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(Tech Crunch)   Google releases talking shoe. CONTROL to provide first purchase order   (techcrunch.com) divider line 33
    More: Stupid, Google, SXSW, University of San Diego  
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1539 clicks; posted to Geek » on 10 Mar 2013 at 12:35 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



33 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2013-03-09 10:44:49 PM
CONTROL to provide first purchase order

And they'll miss it by *that* much.
 
2013-03-09 10:49:00 PM
I hope they don't try the cone of silence

/that never ends well
 
2013-03-09 10:49:49 PM

MaudlinMutantMollusk: I hope they don't try the cone of silence


The WHAT?
 
2013-03-09 10:59:15 PM

Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: MaudlinMutantMollusk: I hope they don't try the cone of silence

The WHAT?


YES! YES! YES!
www.healthcare-informatics.com
 
2013-03-09 11:02:41 PM

MaudlinMutantMollusk: YES! YES! YES!
www.healthcare-informatics.com


... WHAT?
 
2013-03-09 11:11:32 PM

Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: MaudlinMutantMollusk: YES! YES! YES!
www.healthcare-informatics.com

... WHAT?


YES!
 
2013-03-10 12:30:53 AM
It's the ol' android talking shoe trick.
 
2013-03-10 12:49:52 AM
Well I can think of 99 reasons why this is dumb.
 
2013-03-10 12:50:03 AM
So what will it say?

As you're kicking someone's ass, will it apologize for you?  "Oh so sorry, Duck's such a terrible brute, might I Google some trauma centers for you?"
 
2013-03-10 12:55:39 AM
About time they found a use for shoes' tongues.
 
2013-03-10 01:09:54 AM
C'mon Google, we don't want talking shoes... we want auto lace shoes.  You have a year and a half.
 
2013-03-10 01:11:09 AM
Would you believe... 3 flip phones and a pair of crocs?
 
2013-03-10 01:14:44 AM

SpdrJay: Well I can think of 99 reasons why this is dumb.


They should just 86 it while they have the chance...

Tozmo: Would you believe... 3 flip phones and a pair of crocs?


I would find that very hard to believe...

Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: CONTROL to provide first purchase order

And they'll miss it by *that* much.


Dammit Larrabee...
 
2013-03-10 01:15:10 AM
You know, I didn't RTFA, but I think it would be farking hilarious if some wise-ass hacked the software so that it would randomly and audibly fart.  Kind of like those annoy-o-trons that you hide on your coworkers that chirp at infrequent intervals.

Farting shoes.  Heh.

I suppose if I read the freaking article I'd find out something disappointing like they transmit via bluetooth rather than an actual in-unit speaker, but dammit, can't the 10-year old boy in me dream?
 
2013-03-10 01:21:46 AM
I bet this just ends in KAOS....
 
2013-03-10 01:37:11 AM
The Craw?
 
2013-03-10 01:42:13 AM
Google's shareholders must be so relieved that google management seems so incline to spend millons on creating wearable objects that have nothing to do with their core business and that no one will actually use.
 
2013-03-10 01:54:15 AM
The Talking Walking Dead?

/"Ugh, this is boring..."
//"Hold on, I see food!"
///Howard Johnson likes this
 
2013-03-10 03:00:45 AM
Was this guy involved?

www.drewblood.com
 
2013-03-10 03:39:24 AM

Harry_Seldon: The Craw?


No, not the Craw,  the CRAW...

RyansPrivates: I bet this just ends in KAOS....


RyansPrivates, zis is FARK. Vee don't pun here!

/much
 
2013-03-10 03:42:09 AM
Someone at Google is trying too hard.
 
2013-03-10 03:57:29 AM
Brilliant!  I can see the ads now....

"You won't have to worry about taking your $700 pair of shoes out in public and having them broken, because you'll be too embarrassed by your ridiculous talking shoes to ever wear them any place another living person will see you!"

I'm sure they'll sell like hotcakes.
 
2013-03-10 04:40:58 AM
I miss Nick at Night....
 
2013-03-10 07:17:35 AM
My mate Petersen once bought a pair of shoes with Artificial Intelligence. 'Smart Shoes' they were called. It was a neat idea. No matter how blind drunk you were, they could always get you home. But he got rattled one night in Oslo and woke up the next morning in Burma. You see, his shoes got bored going from his local to his flat. They wanted to see the world, you know. He had a hell of a job getting rid of them. No matter who he sold them to, they'd show up again the next day. He tried to shut them out, but they just kicked the door down. The last thing I heard, they sort of... robbed a car and drove it into a canal. They couldn't steer, you see. Petersen was really, really blown away about it. He went to see a priest. The priest told him... he said it was alright and all that, when shoes are happy that they'd get into heaven. You see, it turns out shoes have 'soles'.
 
2013-03-10 07:41:04 AM
www.classictvbeauties.com
 
2013-03-10 07:43:07 AM
media.liveauctiongroup.net
 
2013-03-10 08:26:14 AM
www.byhandmedia.net
 
2013-03-10 08:37:28 AM
arago4.tnw.utwente.nl
 
2013-03-10 09:36:48 AM

Honest Bender: My mate Petersen once bought a pair of shoes with Artificial Intelligence. 'Smart Shoes' they were called. It was a neat idea. No matter how blind drunk you were, they could always get you home. But he got rattled one night in Oslo and woke up the next morning in Burma. You see, his shoes got bored going from his local to his flat. They wanted to see the world, you know. He had a hell of a job getting rid of them. No matter who he sold them to, they'd show up again the next day. He tried to shut them out, but they just kicked the door down. The last thing I heard, they sort of... robbed a car and drove it into a canal. They couldn't steer, you see. Petersen was really, really blown away about it. He went to see a priest. The priest told him... he said it was alright and all that, when shoes are happy that they'd get into heaven. You see, it turns out shoes have 'soles'.


What a sad story.

Wait a minute... How did they open the car door?
 
2013-03-10 11:09:20 AM

SomethingToDo: Honest Bender: My mate Petersen once bought a pair of shoes with Artificial Intelligence. 'Smart Shoes' they were called. It was a neat idea. No matter how blind drunk you were, they could always get you home. But he got rattled one night in Oslo and woke up the next morning in Burma. You see, his shoes got bored going from his local to his flat. They wanted to see the world, you know. He had a hell of a job getting rid of them. No matter who he sold them to, they'd show up again the next day. He tried to shut them out, but they just kicked the door down. The last thing I heard, they sort of... robbed a car and drove it into a canal. They couldn't steer, you see. Petersen was really, really blown away about it. He went to see a priest. The priest told him... he said it was alright and all that, when shoes are happy that they'd get into heaven. You see, it turns out shoes have 'soles'.

What a sad story.

Wait a minute... How did they open the car door?


Sounds like they went out and picked up some street walkers and had their pimp glove open it for them.

/yeah..that was horrible.
 
2013-03-10 12:38:32 PM
I can see the next headline :"Google's CEO asks if you've ever seen anyone say goodbye to a shoe, nukes France, buys and gives away Denver Broncos"
 
2013-03-10 03:46:54 PM
Wake me when Apple releases iMaxiPad with streaming media.
 
2013-03-10 05:03:10 PM

Honest Bender: My mate Petersen once bought a pair of shoes with Artificial Intelligence. 'Smart Shoes' they were called. It was a neat idea. No matter how blind drunk you were, they could always get you home. But he got rattled one night in Oslo and woke up the next morning in Burma. You see, his shoes got bored going from his local to his flat. They wanted to see the world, you know. He had a hell of a job getting rid of them. No matter who he sold them to, they'd show up again the next day. He tried to shut them out, but they just kicked the door down. The last thing I heard, they sort of... robbed a car and drove it into a canal. They couldn't steer, you see. Petersen was really, really blown away about it. He went to see a priest. The priest told him... he said it was alright and all that, when shoes are happy that they'd get into heaven. You see, it turns out shoes have 'soles'.


A round of smeggin' applause.
 
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