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(Daily Dot)   If you wind up in the hospital with a vibrator stuck in your ass, you might as well livetweet it   (dailydot.com) divider line 162
    More: Dumbass, TMI  
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18494 clicks; posted to Main » on 08 Mar 2013 at 1:39 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-03-08 01:41:08 PM
VIBRATOR IS COMING OUT
 
2013-03-08 01:41:47 PM
If you went camping on the side of the road and woke up with a condom in your ass, would you tell anyone?

No...

Wanna go camping?
 
2013-03-08 01:42:41 PM
Victim not a chick.
 
2013-03-08 01:43:00 PM
getting lemons...making lemonade?
 
2013-03-08 01:43:10 PM
Not.Gay.At.All. I.Slipped. Totally.  One.In.A.Million.Shot.Doc, I.Tell.Ya.
 
2013-03-08 01:43:12 PM
i.imgur.com

Approves of the tweet's phrasing.
 
2013-03-08 01:43:34 PM
Best use of Dumbass tag evar.
 
2013-03-08 01:44:26 PM
Dear Abby: Is it gay when my girl dildoes me in the ass?
 
2013-03-08 01:44:50 PM
'It was a million to one shot, Doc. Million to one.'"
 
2013-03-08 01:44:56 PM
Here's the cyanide pill... You want to take it now, or wait until you get home?
 
2013-03-08 01:45:02 PM
It's pretty common so the guy shouldn't have felt too strange..I've told some here before about my wife's exploits at the hospital she works at. She's in pathology, so she sees everything that comes out of ones body.

At least once a month she gets a container that says "foreign body, rectum"...sometimes the container is vibrating.

Sometimes it's a homemade device, like a piece of steel with a string attached and the string breaks. Sometimes, it's even more odd...like a pair of salad tongs.

And it's NEVER a woman getting it removed
 
2013-03-08 01:45:09 PM

Yogimus: Dear Abby: Is it gay when my girl dildoes me in the ass?


Not if it's a strap on. Then "she's" the gay one.
 
2013-03-08 01:45:51 PM

Harry Freakstorm: 'It was a million to one shot, Doc. Million to one.'"


Me thinks I beat you to it......
 
2013-03-08 01:46:13 PM
www.genderforum.org
 
2013-03-08 01:46:25 PM
so very scared?
 
2013-03-08 01:48:02 PM

exit_wound: Victim not a chick.


It never is.
 
2013-03-08 01:48:11 PM
You people who like to stick things up your bottoms: Don't you think to tie a string to the end of it so you can fetch it back out again?
 
2013-03-08 01:48:43 PM

Yogimus: Dear Abby: Is it gay when my girl dildoes me in the ass?


No, only if you let her boyfriend do it.
 
2013-03-08 01:48:46 PM
notice how he didn't say "my vibrator" but rather "a" vibrator.  like it was just one of those things that happens from time to time, and it's annoying but you just to deal with it.
 
2013-03-08 01:49:33 PM

namegoeshere: You people who like to stick things up your bottoms: Don't you think to tie a string to the end of it so you can fetch it back out again?


Strings break..guess you didn't read my post^^^^^
 
2013-03-08 01:49:37 PM

SirEattonHogg: getting lemons...making lemonade?


not this is 'round the corner where fudge is made.
 
2013-03-08 01:49:57 PM
~ #officer sed voodoo dick my ass lol
 
2013-03-08 01:50:58 PM
AKA typical day on TFD.
 
2013-03-08 01:51:01 PM
Things that make you say "Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm"
 
2013-03-08 01:51:03 PM

publikenemy: namegoeshere: You people who like to stick things up your bottoms: Don't you think to tie a string to the end of it so you can fetch it back out again?

Strings break..guess you didn't read my post^^^^^


Ah. Um... Okay...
 
2013-03-08 01:51:25 PM
My ex worked in a hospital lab on third shift.  The stories she had were amazing.  For instance, sometimes the tempered glass on the coffee table doesn't hold the weight of the suction cupped dildo and the user.  I suspect that was a very painful ER trip.
 
2013-03-08 01:51:33 PM
*vomit*
 
2013-03-08 01:51:53 PM
This article needs a Numbass tag.
 
2013-03-08 01:52:13 PM

namegoeshere: You people who like to stick things up your bottoms: Don't you think to tie a string to the end of it so you can fetch it back out again?


... I read that as "so you can felch it out again", and got an entirely different image in my head than you were going for.


publikenemy: It's pretty common so the guy shouldn't have felt too strange..I've told some here before about my wife's exploits at the hospital she works at. She's in pathology, so she sees everything that comes out of ones body.

At least once a month she gets a container that says "foreign body, rectum"...sometimes the container is vibrating.

Sometimes it's a homemade device, like a piece of steel with a string attached and the string breaks. Sometimes, it's even more odd...like a pair of salad tongs.

And it's NEVER a woman getting it removed


So, guys like stuff in their asses, too, but don't want to admit it?
 
2013-03-08 01:54:06 PM
Came for pic of the Anal Intruder. Leaving...too early?

/Three hours
//Smile
 
2013-03-08 01:54:16 PM

mancheese: Best use of Dumbass tag evar.


I completely agree with your assessment and came here to say the same.  Well done.
 
2013-03-08 01:54:35 PM
At least a guy who doesn't complain "It was an accident! I accidental sat down on a powered vibrator!"

/Still lol-ing about the dickhead
 
2013-03-08 01:54:48 PM
Is this the story on the confused MMA fighter?
 
2013-03-08 01:57:32 PM
Would a nice big fart help in a situation like this?
 
2013-03-08 01:57:35 PM
Apparently it was no big deal...
 
2013-03-08 01:58:00 PM

Anderson's Pooper: My ex worked in a hospital lab on third shift.  The stories she had were amazing.  For instance, sometimes the tempered glass on the coffee table doesn't hold the weight of the suction cupped dildo and the user.  I suspect that was a very painful ER trip.


Which is why you use masonry bolts and a concrete wall.

...So I've heard
 
2013-03-08 01:58:46 PM
/waiting on RugbyJock's comments ... ...

// crickets chirping
 
2013-03-08 01:58:49 PM
I just read this story to my GF right now. Maybe if I wasn't lol'g so hard I would've realized that she was, at that moment, stuffing a chicken with apple and onion.

Can't wait for dinner.
 
2013-03-08 01:59:01 PM
Pretty dumb of him, if he had posted it live on Fark, I bet he could have gotten a submission credit.
 
2013-03-08 01:59:07 PM
I'm sure if you did something that asinine and came to my local hospital they'd add insult to injury and tell you to take a seat and wait your turn.
 
2013-03-08 01:59:50 PM
Was that Sam Rockwell movie any good?
 
2013-03-08 01:59:58 PM
My god I gotta find and post the pic wifey showed me of the 5lb solid steel coke can sized device with coned ends and a loop to tie a rope to that came outta some poor bastard.

Rope broke of course

It was quite the surgery to remove it..


But HOW THE FARK did he get it up there that far!?
 
2013-03-08 02:01:40 PM

Anderson's Pooper: My ex worked in a hospital lab on third shift.  The stories she had were amazing.  For instance, sometimes the tempered glass on the coffee table doesn't hold the weight of the suction cupped dildo and the user.  I suspect that was a very painful ER trip.


Not as painful as the guy that came into our ER after inserting a light bulb in his butt and it BROKE.
 
2013-03-08 02:02:17 PM
Only if you call your vibrator "pickle".
 
2013-03-08 02:02:22 PM
Did they put it in a bag so he could take it back home?
 
2013-03-08 02:02:30 PM
Did you guys see the comments on that page?

"There must be a lawsuit in here somewhere"

I didn't want to register to ask... But is this idiot for real??
 
2013-03-08 02:04:50 PM
That's the best ad for energizer I ever saw.
 
2013-03-08 02:05:32 PM
CSB

Knew a hospital resident once that had a collection of X-rays he had stolen from the hospital. This was apparently a common-ish practice amongst the younger ER doctors at this hospital, and in fact, another doctor at the same hospital lost his license about a month later for putting x-rays up on the Internet.

Anyway, all of the x-rays had the ID stickers cut off, and all of them were pics of the ole "foreign object in rectum."

It was an amazing collection. There are three that I particularly remember. A lightbulb was one. A Barbie was another.

But the one that scarred me for life.... that one was a half-roll of paper towels wrapped in duct tape. It was farking enormous - I have no clue how it even arrived at its final location, given its size.

/csb
 
2013-03-08 02:07:00 PM

FirstNationalBastard: namegoeshere: You people who like to stick things up your bottoms: Don't you think to tie a string to the end of it so you can fetch it back out again?

... I read that as "so you can felch it out again", and got an entirely different image in my head than you were going for.


Depends on how flexible the guy is.
 
2013-03-08 02:07:25 PM
toolvinyl.com
 
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