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(SFGate)   Subaru recalling almost 50,000 "zombie cars". BRAAAAAAAAAAAAAKES   (sfgate.com) divider line 45
    More: Strange, Subaru  
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6816 clicks; posted to Business » on 07 Mar 2013 at 6:09 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-03-07 06:13:04 PM  
They're not cars, they're just turbochargers with a very expensive golfcart engine & body attached to them.
 
2013-03-07 06:15:58 PM  
img8.imageshack.us
 
2013-03-07 06:19:55 PM  
Not a fan of the CVT. Do not like.

In any car.
 
2013-03-07 06:21:19 PM  
FTA: "the engines can start on their own "..."if the key fob is dropped, it can malfunction and start the engine"

Um, what? That's not "on their own" - clearly there's an external action that causes to start. Why not recall the key fob? Either way, this is definitely not the 'zombie car' advertised in either the article or the headline.

/Disappointed.
 
2013-03-07 06:21:38 PM  

sethstorm: They're not cars, they're just turbochargers with a very expensive golfcart engine & body attached to them.


Porches?
 
2013-03-07 06:22:58 PM  
Lesbians everywhere are heading to the shop.
 
2013-03-07 06:27:15 PM  
Most boring episode of Walking Dead evar!
 
2013-03-07 06:27:22 PM  
Not a zombie car - but a WERECAR!!
s1.postimage.org
 
2013-03-07 06:33:56 PM  
This is how you know that George Romero is scraping the bottom of the barrel.
 
2013-03-07 06:34:15 PM  

NotoriousFire: FTA: "the engines can start on their own "..."if the key fob is dropped, it can malfunction and start the engine"

Um, what? That's not "on their own" - clearly there's an external action that causes to start. Why not recall the key fob? Either way, this is definitely not the 'zombie car' advertised in either the article or the headline.

/Disappointed.


Remote starting has to be one of the dumbest features ever introduced to cars. You want to warm up your car before you get in it? Why? You're leaving your running while unattended. That's actually against the law in many states. I keep my car in a garage. Do I really want to walk into my garage if it's filled up with carbon monoxide? No, I don't. So it's cold outside. Boo hoo. That's why I wear a coat and if it's really cold I'll break out the hat and the gloves and maybe even a scarf.

I'm not disappointed that my car doesn't have this feature. I'm actually annoyed that it has a remote that can open the trunk. On noes, if I didn't have that I'd have to insert a key to open it. That "feature" has caused me a lot of grief. If that button on the remote gets hit and I didn't mean to, which has happened a couple of times, I'll go out to my car and find that the battery is dead.

If you're going to open the trunk, you're probably going to want to get something out of it or put something into it so why not just insert the farking key. You're right there anyway. And don't tell me it's so you can open the trunk without getting out of the car either because I've got a button on the dash that will do that anyway if the motor is running and I'm in park.
 
2013-03-07 06:35:52 PM  

Night Night Cream Puff: Porches?


They rarely start on their own and take off.

i49.tinypic.com
 
2013-03-07 06:42:55 PM  
When there is no more room in the garage... the cars will start themselves.
 
2013-03-07 06:43:00 PM  

SurelyShirley: Night Night Cream Puff: Porches?

They rarely start on their own and take off.

[i49.tinypic.com image 850x590]


Missing the point of the comment I quoted? He complained about "golf cart engines" so I decided to go snarky and point out Porches also use boxer engines. It shouldn't have been that hard to follow. Yeah, yeah, welcome to Fark and all.
 
2013-03-07 06:46:13 PM  

NotoriousFire: FTA: "the engines can start on their own "..."if the key fob is dropped, it can malfunction and start the engine"

Um, what? That's not "on their own" - clearly there's an external action that causes to start. Why not recall the key fob? Either way, this is definitely not the 'zombie car' advertised in either the article or the headline.

/Disappointed.


FTA: Subaru dealers will replace the fobs free of charge.

It sounds like they are doing just as you stated, and I would not pay a dime for them to replace it.  If I purchased a new Subaru, I wouldn't even want it anymore if it had such a recall, however if it's just the FOB, fine, but if there is something else wrong, screw that car. Probably an electrical disaster waiting to happen.  My Saab FOB was screwed up and cost $80 from the dealership and I had a shiatload of electrical problems with only 30k-40k on it the car.  These little things add up.
 
2013-03-07 06:55:13 PM  

Night Night Cream Puff: SurelyShirley: Night Night Cream Puff: Porches?

They rarely start on their own and take off.

[i49.tinypic.com image 850x590]

Missing the point of the comment I quoted? He complained about "golf cart engines" so I decided to go snarky and point out Porches also use boxer engines. It shouldn't have been that hard to follow. Yeah, yeah, welcome to Fark and all.


GDI, nevermind... spelling FTL...
 
2013-03-07 06:59:57 PM  
Happy Hours:

I agree remote starts are unnecessary, however I don't think they are illegal anywhere.  Flint has the law against unattended running vehicles, but the doors have to be unlocked and the key has to be in the car to get into trouble.  Remotes starts do not make the car drivable, you need the key to unlock the steering column and I don't think you can put it into gear.  They are perfectly fine here.  Besides if all it takes to be illegal is the motor is running, police would have to bust themselves since they do it all the time with the doors locked.

A reason why I never got a remote start is because I read sometime back from a car article that warming the car early is unnecessary.  Two reasons were stated, first the engine will do fine as long as you don't go crazy as soon as you are out of the driveway.  Second, your AT will still be cold and can only warm up as you drive.  So, I give my truck a moment to get the oil moving good and take it easy for the first couple miles.  I haven't had any trouble with that advice.
 
2013-03-07 07:00:30 PM  

JohnnyRebel88: My Saab FOB


Shouldn't that be a FOOB?

Hmm, FOOB rhymes with BOOB, though...
 
2013-03-07 07:02:08 PM  

Happy Hours: NotoriousFire: FTA: "the engines can start on their own "..."if the key fob is dropped, it can malfunction and start the engine"

Um, what? That's not "on their own" - clearly there's an external action that causes to start. Why not recall the key fob? Either way, this is definitely not the 'zombie car' advertised in either the article or the headline.

/Disappointed.

Remote starting has to be one of the dumbest features ever introduced to cars. You want to warm up your car before you get in it? Why? You're leaving your running while unattended. That's actually against the law in many states. I keep my car in a garage. Do I really want to walk into my garage if it's filled up with carbon monoxide? No, I don't. So it's cold outside. Boo hoo. That's why I wear a coat and if it's really cold I'll break out the hat and the gloves and maybe even a scarf.

I'm not disappointed that my car doesn't have this feature. I'm actually annoyed that it has a remote that can open the trunk. On noes, if I didn't have that I'd have to insert a key to open it. That "feature" has caused me a lot of grief. If that button on the remote gets hit and I didn't mean to, which has happened a couple of times, I'll go out to my car and find that the battery is dead.

If you're going to open the trunk, you're probably going to want to get something out of it or put something into it so why not just insert the farking key. You're right there anyway. And don't tell me it's so you can open the trunk without getting out of the car either because I've got a button on the dash that will do that anyway if the motor is running and I'm in park.


Remote start is good for people in cold areas I hear. Keyless trunk is just nice to reduce metal-metal wear in and around the key cylinder.
 
2013-03-07 07:22:19 PM  
What a true "zombie car" looks like:


1.bp.blogspot.com
 
2013-03-07 07:24:55 PM  

NotoriousFire: FTA: "the engines can start on their own "..."if the key fob is dropped, it can malfunction and start the engine"

Um, what? That's not "on their own" - clearly there's an external action that causes to start. Why not recall the key fob? Either way, this is definitely not the 'zombie car' advertised in either the article or the headline.

/Disappointed.


I'm confused. You appear to have read the article, but also appear to have not read the article.
 
2013-03-07 07:27:53 PM  
fob = fun of a biatch
 
2013-03-07 07:28:17 PM  

Night Night Cream Puff: sethstorm: They're not cars, they're just turbochargers with a very expensive golfcart engine & body attached to them.

Porches?


Then Subarus are just turbochargers with a  moderately expensive golfcart engine and body attached to them.
 
2013-03-07 07:31:45 PM  

Frederf: Remote start is good for people in cold areas I hear. Keyless trunk is just nice to reduce metal-metal wear in and around the key cylinder.


I don't want to get in a pissing match about how cold it can get where I live because I'm sure many here live places where it gets colder, but I do spend much of the winter well below freezing and sometimes it gets below zero (Fahrenheit). I grew up in an area where anything below 40 was considered "cold". I'm now adjusted and I don't consider it "cold" unless it's below 10 degrees.

Sure, it would be nice if my car were warmed up when I got into it, but that's just personal comfort. It's not going to help the car at all and it's only going to burn gas. But that's why I dress for the weather. If it's cold out (below 10), I'm going to put on gloves and a hat in addition to my coat. It takes about 10 minutes before my car generates enough heat for the heater to be effective, but I deal with it. It's just one of life's smaller problems.

As it is now, my garage is noticeably warmer than the great outdoors. The other day the internet told me it was 21 where I lived. I got in my car and it said it was 32. 2 miles later my car's thermometer agreed that it was indeed 21. I survived.

The trunk release thing is just lazy - and has caused me grief by accidentally hitting it and ending up with a dead battery. I'd gladly accept a little metal on metal wear to the lock over being stuck with a dead battery.

One time when that happened I knocked on 5 different neighbor's doors trying to find someone to give me a jump-start. I'm sure some of them weren't home, but jesus farking christ on a cross, I didn't believe all of them weren't.

I ended up standing around in my garage with my jumper cables until I saw someone. I've also taken to very carefully making sure the trunk is shut and carefully holding the key as if it's a bomb when I get home.
 
2013-03-07 07:39:24 PM  
I open the trunk of my car by pushing the latch button on the trunk.  It's not remote release while at the same time I have no "metal on metal" wear.  Crazy Germans.
 
2013-03-07 07:51:29 PM  
This isn't a bug, it's a feature. Just last week, I was going out to get some groceries and dropped the key fob. My Forester started up, backed out of the driveway and took off. My wife and I were debating whether we should call the police or Subaru technical support when the car pulled back into the garage with a full bag of groceries. The only real problem is the car had apparently rejected my list of chocolate, beer and condoms and instead delivered two bags of healthy organic vegetables from Whole Foods.
 
2013-03-07 08:09:49 PM  

waffle299: This isn't a bug, it's a feature. Just last week, I was going out to get some groceries and dropped the key fob. My Forester started up, backed out of the driveway and took off. My wife and I were debating whether we should call the police or Subaru technical support when the car pulled back into the garage with a full bag of groceries. The only real problem is the car had apparently rejected my list of chocolate, beer and condoms and instead delivered two bags of healthy organic vegetables from Whole Foods.


Similar thing happened to me but with a Prius. It took off and was gone for several days. It finally came back with a gay artist from Portland behind the wheel and a university liberal arts associate professor from the Seattle area riding shotgun.

Now I've got TWO holes to dig in the backyard...
 
2013-03-07 08:19:34 PM  
The ones we'd built to be better than flesh and bone,
But the cars were in it, of course . . .
and they hunted us
Like rabbits through the cramped streets on that Bloody Monday,
The Madison Avenue busses leading the charge.
The busses were pretty bad--but I'll not forget
The smash of glass when the Duesenberg Subaru left the show-room
And pinned three brokers to the Racquet Club steps
Or the long howl of the horns when they saw men run,
When they saw them looking for holes in the solid ground . . .
 
2013-03-07 08:45:16 PM  
If you live where it gets truly cold, then remote start is useful;  usually it will automatically turn off after about twenty minutes, so by starting the car a couple of times during a night when you know the temperatures are going negative, the car will actually start up in the morning.

My old add-on remote starter had a "automatic cold start" which did this on it's own, when programmed.
 
2013-03-07 08:53:38 PM  
 Night Night Cream Puff: Porches?

They rarely start on their own and take off.

[i49.tinypic.com image 850x590]


"Missing the point of the comment I quoted? He complained about "golf cart engines" so I decided to go snarky and point out Porches also use boxer engines. It shouldn't have been that hard to follow. Yeah, yeah, welcome to Fark and all."

LOL

Porsches not Porches.

And you even reiterated it without understanding your error.

Snicker

And he politely just gave up on you, figuring it was well over your head. I refuse to give up on you so easily. I believe you CAN learn. Welcome to 2nd grade spelling (spoken all snarky). Hope it's not too hard to follow-

So, welcome to reality and all-

chuckle
 
2013-03-07 09:17:20 PM  

ChicagoKev: If you live where it gets truly cold, then remote start is useful;  usually it will automatically turn off after about twenty minutes, so by starting the car a couple of times during a night when you know the temperatures are going negative, the car will actually start up in the morning.

My old add-on remote starter had a "automatic cold start" which did this on it's own, when programmed.


Define "cold" and define "useful"

I really don't think it's much colder in Chicago than it is where I live. It might not even be as cold.

It's a really stupid feature and it's wasteful. But no matter how cold it gets (I think -14 is the coldest I've experienced) you should always dress for the occasion. Wear a few extra layers of clothing. It's cold outside, there's no kind of atmosphere. Your car's engine is just that - an engine to power your car. It's not a heater so your precious snowflake of a body won't experience the lack of heat outside.
 
2013-03-07 10:02:10 PM  
Happy Hours:
I ended up standing around in my garage with my jumper cables until I saw someone. I've also taken to very carefully making sure the trunk is shut and carefully holding the key as if it's a bomb when I get home.

Out of curiosity, what's causing the battery drain when the trunk is open?  An incandescent trunk light?  If so, maybe consider replacing the light with one or more LEDs?  You could power a small strip of 15-16 LEDs while drawing only 60-80mA.  You could leave your trunk open for a week and still not have a dead battery.  It'd probably be brighter than an incandescent trunk light, too.
 
2013-03-07 10:19:14 PM  

arcas: Happy Hours:
I ended up standing around in my garage with my jumper cables until I saw someone. I've also taken to very carefully making sure the trunk is shut and carefully holding the key as if it's a bomb when I get home.

Out of curiosity, what's causing the battery drain when the trunk is open?  An incandescent trunk light?  If so, maybe consider replacing the light with one or more LEDs?  You could power a small strip of 15-16 LEDs while drawing only 60-80mA.  You could leave your trunk open for a week and still not have a dead battery.  It'd probably be brighter than an incandescent trunk light, too.


Yes, incandescent light and you're right but do I really want to replace it with LEDs? That would be an improvement but I hardly ever open the trunk anyway. It seems like a lot of work and expense.

I can think of a few other better solutions.

1: Disable the trunk switch on the key-fob.
2: Unscrew the light in the trunk and just screw it back in when I need it
3:: Buy a 2nd car - it wouldn't have to be anything great, just something I could use to jump start my daily driver - seems a bit extreme but I've long thought about getting a 2nd car. Not that I need one, just that it would be cool to have options. The only problem is do I get an old Jeep with 4WD or a Bugatti Veyron?
4: Do what I do now and be extra careful to make sure the trunk is closed when I park and make sure I don't hit that button.
5: There's probably a fuse I could remove or failing that a wire I could cut to disable the electronic trunk release.
 
2013-03-07 10:21:12 PM  

Znuh: Not a fan of the CVT. Do not like.

In any car.


I'm not really a fan either, but if it gives the unwashed masses of people, who refuse to use three pedals with their feet, slightly better MPG then I'm all for it.
 
2013-03-07 11:04:34 PM  
i46.tinypic.com

sethstorm: They're not cars, they're just turbochargers with a very expensive golfcart engine & body attached to them.


My golf cart engine has 400hp and 300lb of torque with a stage 2 tune, handles like a dream, and embarasses all but the most powerful V8s.  You can keep your shiatty Honda Civic.
 
2013-03-07 11:19:35 PM  

Happy Hours: 3:: Buy a 2nd car - it wouldn't have to be anything great, just something I could use to jump start my daily driver - seems a bit extreme but I've long thought about getting a 2nd car. Not that I need one, just that it would be cool to have options. The only problem is do I get an old Jeep with 4WD or a Bugatti Veyron?


These are way cheaper.

http://www.autozone.com/autozone/accessories/Electrical/Battery-Boos te r-Jump-Starter-Pack/_/N-2629
 
2013-03-07 11:39:07 PM  

saturn badger: Happy Hours: 3:: Buy a 2nd car - it wouldn't have to be anything great, just something I could use to jump start my daily driver - seems a bit extreme but I've long thought about getting a 2nd car. Not that I need one, just that it would be cool to have options. The only problem is do I get an old Jeep with 4WD or a Bugatti Veyron?

These are way cheaper.

http://www.autozone.com/autozone/accessories/Electrical/Battery-Boos te r-Jump-Starter-Pack/_/N-2629


Yeah, I thought about that too, but making sure the trunk isn't open is way easier. And cheaper.

CSB

I got a delivery person to give me a jump start once.

Also when I bought a new battery I thought I could stop for beer and restart the car. I couldn't. Had to jump it to go to AutoZone. AutoZone is really nice in that they'll actually help you out with simple things like replacing a car battery. Unless it's a Chrysler where they put the battery in the front fender.

When I bought the current battery and asked if they would help install it, they asked what kind of car I drove. And they said no. FFS, if it was a normal car with the battery under the hood like almost every other car in the world, I wouldn't need help replacing it, would I?

The owner's manual says you don't have to take the wheel off to replace the battery. It's full of shiat. I can't even imagine how the fark you would get the old battery out without taking the wheel off. It was hard enough to do even with the wheel off. Jack up the car, take the wheel off, mess with the fender cover, pull old battery out, put it all back together. Fark you Chrysler.

At least I only have to do that about once every 9 or 10 years. Hopefully I'll have a newer car before my current battery dies.


lol "current" "battery".....I swear I didn't realize the joke until I wrote it.
 
2013-03-08 12:03:43 AM  

PsychoPhil: JohnnyRebel88: My Saab FOB

Shouldn't that be a FOOB?

Hmm, FOOB rhymes with BOOB, though...


It's a Saab faab.
 
2013-03-08 12:10:14 AM  

Happy Hours: saturn badger: Happy Hours: 3:: Buy a 2nd car - it wouldn't have to be anything great, just something I could use to jump start my daily driver - seems a bit extreme but I've long thought about getting a 2nd car. Not that I need one, just that it would be cool to have options. The only problem is do I get an old Jeep with 4WD or a Bugatti Veyron?

These are way cheaper.

http://www.autozone.com/autozone/accessories/Electrical/Battery-Boos te r-Jump-Starter-Pack/_/N-2629

Yeah, I thought about that too, but making sure the trunk isn't open is way easier. And cheaper.

CSB

I got a delivery person to give me a jump start once.

Also when I bought a new battery I thought I could stop for beer and restart the car. I couldn't. Had to jump it to go to AutoZone. AutoZone is really nice in that they'll actually help you out with simple things like replacing a car battery. Unless it's a Chrysler where they put the battery in the front fender.

When I bought the current battery and asked if they would help install it, they asked what kind of car I drove. And they said no. FFS, if it was a normal car with the battery under the hood like almost every other car in the world, I wouldn't need help replacing it, would I?

The owner's manual says you don't have to take the wheel off to replace the battery. It's full of shiat. I can't even imagine how the fark you would get the old battery out without taking the wheel off. It was hard enough to do even with the wheel off. Jack up the car, take the wheel off, mess with the fender cover, pull old battery out, put it all back together. Fark you Chrysler.

At least I only have to do that about once every 9 or 10 years. Hopefully I'll have a newer car before my current battery dies.


lol "current" "battery".....I swear I didn't realize the joke until I wrote it.


Earlier this week I lost my battery. It was all good then after work it was gone. No warning. I called my mechanic and even though it was after hours he sent his son out with a jumper box. He is not far away from where I was and told me to drive it over. They stress tested the charging system (it was good) and installed a new battery. It is easy to get to, unlike yours. He was busy with a few latecomer customers and told me to come by the next night to settle up.

I'm thinking of getting one of those boxes because I do forest roads on occaision. I can see how it might save my ass one of these days. You never know when that battery is going to south on you.

/nice to know a shop that takes care of me
 
2013-03-08 02:00:28 AM  
Chrysler did weird things. I remember reading on the PT Cruiser, how I had to remove one of the front axle assemblies to replace the alternator.

That's retarded.

Then I reconnected the turbo hose where it had mysteriously popped off the intercooler of a friends' 'top of the line' HHR. Go to start the car, and it behaved like a person possessed. Turns out GM put the main ground point for the Computer's harness on.....the front of the bottom of the oil pan. Where it gets coated with crud. Cleaned that up and amazingly, once ground was restored, everything worked as if nothing had happened.

There's a huge recent outpouring of Engineers completely not thinking and doing some of the most idiotic things with design. With the PT, it was like they just said 'fark you'; with the HHR, "We don't give a crap if this strands you with some of the most bizarre, impossible to diagnose symptoms ever, since the Computer in this thing controls everything from Engine Management to the car's Climate Control".

Fark. That.
 
2013-03-08 02:20:01 AM  
I'm picking up my 2013 Impreza tomorrow, so i'm getting a kick etc.
 
2013-03-08 08:12:41 AM  
Bung_Howdy:LOL

Porsches not Porches.

And you even reiterated it without understanding your error.

Snicker

And he politely just gave up on you, figuring it was well over your head. I refuse to give up on you so easily. I believe you CAN learn. Welcome to 2nd grade spelling (spoken all snarky). Hope it's not too hard to follow-

So, welcome to reality and all-

chuckle


And if you'll notice, I caught myself 10 minutes later after waking up a bit. Being at work for 15 hours and Farking at the same time probably isn't smart, but I did get the joke. You, however, couldn't help but make a snide post 2 hours later. Did it really take you that long to come up with your witty retort or did you just stop in your tracks and not bother reading a whole 2 more posts before replying? It's not like this thread had hundreds of posts and you'd have to read 5 pages before getting your chance to strike. You must be an internet bad ass.
 
2013-03-08 09:48:52 AM  

Znuh: Not a fan of the CVT. Do not like.

In any car.


May I be so bold as to ask why?  I imagine there's a good reason why the technology isn't common in cars
 
2013-03-08 10:03:18 AM  

sethstorm: They're not cars, they're just turbochargers with a very expensive golfcart engine & body attached to them.


ORLY?

www.autospectator.com
 
2013-03-08 11:05:14 AM  

Fade2black: [i46.tinypic.com image 640x480]
sethstorm: They're not cars, they're just turbochargers with a very expensive golfcart engine & body attached to them.

My golf cart engine has 400hp and 300lb of torque with a stage 2 tune, handles like a dream, and embarasses all but the most powerful V8s.  You can keep your shiatty Honda Civic.


rawr

i21.photobucket.com
 
2013-03-08 02:54:57 PM  

Girion47: Fade2black: [i46.tinypic.com image 640x480]
sethstorm: They're not cars, they're just turbochargers with a very expensive golfcart engine & body attached to them.

My golf cart engine has 400hp and 300lb of torque with a stage 2 tune, handles like a dream, and embarasses all but the most powerful V8s.  You can keep your shiatty Honda Civic.

rawr


Bro fist.
 
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