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(Kickstarter)   Help a veteran of the LA Riots, both Gulf Wars, and Bosnia publish his war novel, "A Werewolf Stole My Cigarettes"   (kickstarter.com) divider line 11
    More: Plug, Bosnia, war novel  
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334 clicks; posted to FarkUs » on 07 Mar 2013 at 7:37 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-03-07 06:05:08 PM
I'd like to meet his tailor.
 
2013-03-07 07:48:20 PM
I'm going to go out on an unpopular limb here and say "write a GOOD novel. Then a traditional publisher will publish it for you. They'll do all the printing, all the marketing, all the distribution for you."

Vanity press is a ripoff, a dead end for people who want to write but are afraid of the hard work that it takes to get a novel published.

If you are who you say you are, I'm pretty sure you're not afraid of hard work.
 
2013-03-07 08:14:45 PM
I'll buy one if you promise to go back on your medication and stay on it.
 
2013-03-07 09:16:12 PM
Thanks for your service of the country. I mean that sincerely.

But I'd give a big "no" on the writing, at least based on the excerpt. You need to work on developing a readable narrative voice. That clipped, Noir-ish style of first-person internal monologue gets really difficult to stick with, page after page, without some good chunks of more conventional exposition to break them up. (Even Dashiell Hammett and Raymond Carver keep that stuff dialed back most of the time.) And unless you're going for the Faulkner-style "unreliable narrator" bit, your narrator character needs to be able to stick with one thought long enough to move the scene along. Your narrator's tendency to drift away from getting the story set up (a soldier turned into a dog and killed a bunch of enemies, is what I'm getting) and instead indulge every tangential thought becomes infuriating within just a page or two.

You also lean way too heavy on military jargon and speech patterns. I know you're trying to have it sound authentic, but it also needs to be comprehensible to readers who don't have that kind of background. Read some of Tom Clancy's early books to get a feel for how much military lingo and conversational style you can get away with before you have to drop back to standard English to explain it to the civilians (hint: it's less than you'd think).

And just from a straight-up copy-editing perspective, you've got lots of grammatical and punctuation errors that need fixing, and your verb tenses jump around randomly seemingly randomly.

But hey, you're already funded, so don't let me drag you down.
 
2013-03-07 11:19:59 PM

Uzzah: Thanks for your service of the country. I mean that sincerely..


Maybe you mean it sincerely but thanking servicemen for their service has become so cliche that it's less than meaningless.

+1 for the title,

-1 for referencing Reno 911 (worst comedy ever - yeah, I know a lot of farkers love that show, but it's stupid)

The actual writing seems okay. I might be inclined to read it if the internet is down and I have nothing better to do or if I'm stuck in an airport.
 
2013-03-08 05:47:49 AM
Hemingway didn't need kickstart to finish a book. He needed booze.
 
2013-03-08 09:36:44 AM

unlikely: I'm going to go out on an unpopular limb here and say "write a GOOD novel. Then a traditional publisher will publish it for you. They'll do all the printing, all the marketing, all the distribution for you."

Vanity press is a ripoff, a dead end for people who want to write but are afraid of the hard work that it takes to get a novel published.

If you are who you say you are, I'm pretty sure you're not afraid of hard work.


Yep, there are far too many folks out there who write something and then send it out to agents.  When their very rough draft gets rejected, they immediately blame the industry and go to publish on their own, so they can proclaim themselves a writer.

I have two novels in my drawer right now that have gone through multiple drafts.  I won't be getting them self-published, but I will keep tinkering with them until they attract the attention of agents.  It's sort of a self-respect thing.
 
2013-03-08 09:52:26 AM
Which side did you fight n in the LA riots?
 
2013-03-08 10:37:20 AM

whizbangthedirtfarmer: Yep, there are far too many folks out there who write something and then send it out to agents.  When their very rough draft gets rejected, they immediately blame the industry and go to publish on their own, so they can proclaim themselves a writer author.


Pet peeve.

Plenty of writers never become authors.
 
2013-03-08 11:18:00 AM

Old_Chief_Scott: whizbangthedirtfarmer: Yep, there are far too many folks out there who write something and then send it out to agents.  When their very rough draft gets rejected, they immediately blame the industry and go to publish on their own, so they can proclaim themselves a writer author.

Pet peeve.

Plenty of writers never become authors.


On the other hand, plenty of authors aren't writers.
 
2013-03-08 11:49:13 AM

whizbangthedirtfarmer: Old_Chief_Scott: whizbangthedirtfarmer: Yep, there are far too many folks out there who write something and then send it out to agents.  When their very rough draft gets rejected, they immediately blame the industry and go to publish on their own, so they can proclaim themselves a writer author.

Pet peeve.

Plenty of writers never become authors.

On the other hand, plenty of authors aren't writers.


On this we can agree.
 
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