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(Fox News)   North Korea threatens pre-emptive nuclear strike in retaliation for Dennis Rodman   (foxnews.com) divider line 278
    More: Scary, Dennis Rodman, North Koreans, United States, Nuclear Non-Proliferation Treaty, international sanctions, nuclear wars, U.N. Security Council, ballistic missiles  
•       •       •

10597 clicks; posted to Main » on 07 Mar 2013 at 8:26 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-03-07 09:01:15 AM
Looks like the final countdown has reached un.
 
2013-03-07 09:07:07 AM

great_tigers: AverageAmericanGuy: Thanks, Dubya. Pre-emptive strikes as foreign policy were a really great idea.

NOT.

Last time I checked, W hasn't been in office in four years. Obama had an opportunity to explore a peaceful resolution to this situation and refused. If you have an opportunity to make amends with a country that has hated your guts for 60 years I think you at least explore it.


A state of war still exists between North and South. Thought you knew...
 
2013-03-07 09:07:57 AM
img.photobucket.com
 
2013-03-07 09:08:33 AM

spentmiles: We should chopper into North Korea, kidnap The Dear Eater, and take him to a warehouse set-up with video equipment.  We then start the cameras rolling and record Dolf Lundgren pulling down Fatty's pants, bending him over his knee, and spanking him.  Then use our broadcast laser to play it on the moon, over and over again, for six weeks.  Then, carpet bomb the entire stretch of desolate shiat farms until every last soldier, civilian, and animal is dead.  Then spray radioactive fluid over every square inch.  Then delete every mention of North Korea from every book on the planet.  Then just wander around, looking at one another, knowing how awesome we are.


A little harsh but I like your enthusiasm.
 
2013-03-07 09:08:56 AM
Love the Bush hate on the thread.  Because you know, for the thousands of years civilization has existed, no armed power ever threatened anyone else with a pre-emptive attack or invented a reason to go to war out of thin air.   And certainly before Bush there were never any power mad dictators who got too big for their britches with inevitable results.
 
2013-03-07 09:09:56 AM
Well crap, India and China are going all first world on us so we're gonna need to take over NK in order to find enough warm bodies to manufacture some cheap shiat for us for a generation or two.  We're not gonna stand around and watch him exploit his people when our conglomerates could be profiting from their misery.  Walmart needs some more dollar towels and tires.

Come at us bro.
 
2013-03-07 09:10:30 AM

yagottabefarkinkiddinme: Do we preempt their attack now?


No. Now is the time for us to protect out precious solidly fluids so that the communists can't sap them and prevent women from robbing us of our essence.
 
2013-03-07 09:12:21 AM

JackieRabbit: yagottabefarkinkiddinme: Do we preempt their attack now?

No. Now is the time for us to protect out precious solidly fluids so that the communists can't sap them and prevent women from robbing us of our essence.


Solidly fluids. That's what bizarro superman ejaculates. I hear it hurts like a sonofabiatch.
 
2013-03-07 09:12:57 AM

I_C_Weener: Imagine if we'd sent RuPaul.


You don't even wanna know how much I'd have paid to see that.
 
2013-03-07 09:13:54 AM
EMP

Look it up.  No fireball of destruction, but oh the misery.

Tip: Fark.com will be down.

hmmm, maybe if we unplug the hipster-juiceboxers, might be a good thing
 
2013-03-07 09:20:07 AM

Community Agitator: EMP

Look it up.  No fireball of destruction, but oh the misery.

Tip: Fark.com will be down.

hmmm, maybe if we unplug the hipster-juiceboxers, might be a good thing


Have you seen a pic of NK at night?  EMP would mean very little to them.
 
2013-03-07 09:21:02 AM

SubBass49: Basically North Korea is the global version of Milton from Office Space.

[www.investitwisely.com image 300x225]

Everybody thinks his mumbling threats are full of shiat...and usually they are...but one of these days something bad will probably happen if something doesn't change.


So we should drop cakes on them instead of nukes? Or big red staplers? Your strange metaphor confuses and frightens me.

/I'm just a caveman
/I will sue you and your whole crummy airline!
 
2013-03-07 09:21:09 AM

DanInKansas: Love the Bush hate on the thread.  Because you know, for the thousands of years civilization has existed, no armed power ever threatened anyone else with a pre-emptive attack or invented a reason to go to war out of thin air.   And certainly before Bush there were never any power mad dictators who got too big for their britches with inevitable results.


So you admit Bush was a power mad dictator...
 
2013-03-07 09:21:30 AM

my lip balm addiction: Caelistis: As long as they wipe out Seattle, I'm good.

Hey! fark you with a rusty rake!


That's exactly what living in Seattle feels like. It would be no great loss.
 
2013-03-07 09:23:55 AM

Voiceofreason01: BillCo:The only reason they continue to support them is because they know it annoys the rest of the free world.

Or because they have a lot to lose by allowing the US to maintain a large military force too close to a historically disputed border or because they have the most to lose of anybody if N. Korea collapses and millions of starving refugees come flooding into their country, many helpfully trained and armed by Best Korea's bloated military.

/it's almost as if most nations don't base their foreign policy on the same criteria as a first grader on the playground.


Those are all very valid points, but I also think that using the Koreas as surrogates is a way for the US and China to wave their dicks at each other without really risking any actual confrontation between the two super-powers. We don't really like each other, but we are pretty damn dependent on each other economically and a direct confrontation would be devastating for both countries.
 
2013-03-07 09:25:50 AM

TheShavingofOccam123: <b><a href="http://www.fark.com/comments/7630360/82905127#c82905127" target="_blank">SubBass49</a>:</b> <i>Basically North Korea is the global version of Milton from Office Space.

[www.investitwisely.com image 300x225]

Everybody thinks his mumbling threats are full of shiat...and usually they are...but one of these days something bad will probably happen if something doesn't change.</i>

So we should drop cakes on them instead of nukes? Or big red staplers? Your strange metaphor confuses and frightens me.

/I'm just a caveman
/I will sue you and your whole crummy airline!


Drop the entire 1996 Chicago Bulls Team on them.
www.nba.com
 
2013-03-07 09:26:14 AM

Bored Horde: How many times has Fark called for the "glass parking lot" treatment of nations full of tens of millions of people in the middle east?


Fark is not the chief executive officer of the country's military. You can tell I'm not because Cuba is still embargoed. If I were in charge of the US, even for a day, I'd try to lift the sanctions against Cuba and encourage casinos.
 
2013-03-07 09:26:18 AM
2.bp.blogspot.com

Go ahead.  Skin it.  Skin that smokewagon and see what happens.
 
2013-03-07 09:26:35 AM

neongoats: JackieRabbit: yagottabefarkinkiddinme: Do we preempt their attack now?

No. Now is the time for us to protect out precious solidly fluids so that the communists can't sap them and prevent women from robbing us of our essence.

Solidly fluids. That's what bizarro superman ejaculates. I hear it hurts like a sonofabiatch.


You have obviously never seen a Russian drink water, have you? OF COURSE NOT! BECAUSE THEY DRINK VODKA!
 
2013-03-07 09:27:19 AM

mytdawg: Well crap, India and China are going all first world on us so we're gonna need to take over NK in order to find enough warm bodies to manufacture some cheap shiat for us for a generation or two.  We're not gonna stand around and watch him exploit his people when our conglomerates could be profiting from their misery.  Walmart needs some more dollar towels and tires.

Come at us bro.


www.danklyn.com

I admire the seaming and construction of your nautical propulsive tarpaulin
 
2013-03-07 09:27:29 AM

WinoRhino: So now is probably not the time I should be heading to Hawaii for a vacation, huh? Although, front-row seats on the fail might be fun.


Hawaii would be safe from a missile attack from Best Korea; it would be too small of a target for their technology. Mainland USA would be the target as a nuke would cause significant (if not massive) damage anywhere it lands.
 
2013-03-07 09:27:58 AM

Theory Of Null: TheShavingofOccam123: <b><a href="http://www.fark.com/comments/7630360/82905127#c82905127" target="_blank">SubBass49</a>:</b> <i>Basically North Korea is the global version of Milton from Office Space.

[www.investitwisely.com image 300x225]

Everybody thinks his mumbling threats are full of shiat...and usually they are...but one of these days something bad will probably happen if something doesn't change.</i>

So we should drop cakes on them instead of nukes? Or big red staplers? Your strange metaphor confuses and frightens me.

/I'm just a caveman
/I will sue you and your whole crummy airline!

Drop the entire 1996 Chicago Bulls Team on them.
[www.nba.com image 350x240]


Can we drop ship the entire world supply of air Jordan's on them too? Motivate our urban minded youths to invade.
 
2013-03-07 09:28:25 AM

H31N0US: The mouse that roared.


Do they have a Q bomb?
 
2013-03-07 09:30:54 AM

Theory Of Null: TheShavingofOccam123: <b><a href="http://www.fark.com/comments/7630360/82905127#c82905127" target="_blank">SubBass49</a>:</b> <i>Basically North Korea is the global version of Milton from Office Space.

[www.investitwisely.com image 300x225]

Everybody thinks his mumbling threats are full of shiat...and usually they are...but one of these days something bad will probably happen if something doesn't change.</i>

So we should drop cakes on them instead of nukes? Or big red staplers? Your strange metaphor confuses and frightens me.

/I'm just a caveman
/I will sue you and your whole crummy airline!

Drop the entire 1996 Chicago Bulls Team on them.
[www.nba.com image 350x240]


This is way off topic but there is a stunning lack of tattoos in that photo. Also, who the fark is #54 and #34? Looks like they picked those guys right out of my local YMCA.
 
2013-03-07 09:31:34 AM

ferretman: Mainland USA would be the target as a nuke would cause significant (if not massive) damage anywhere it lands.


ಠ_ಠ

Have you never heard of Ohio?
 
2013-03-07 09:32:22 AM

SubBass49: AverageAmericanGuy: Thanks, Dubya. Pre-emptive strikes as foreign policy were a really great idea.

NOT.

I'm not exactly a pro-war guy, but I'd love to see China stand off to the side and say, "Sorry guys, you're on your own...take your best shot USA, we're not getting involved."  Just park a few destroyers and carriers off the coast and light the damn place up like the 4th of July.  Make sure we've got a STABLE shadow government waiting in the wings.

Then reunification, etc.


You're onto a great idea: sit off the coast with a couple of battleships and launch fireworks to explode high in the sky over Kimmy's house for the whole night. Then we send our ambassador over to knock on his door and ask him how the nuke Program is going. Make Rodman the ambassador...
 
2013-03-07 09:34:08 AM

MmmmBacon: GiantRex: Does North Korea even have the ability to launch a nuclear missile as far as Alaska? Let alone the mainland US. I haven't really been paying attention, but I thought that most of their stuff tended to either fizzle or blow up on the launchpad.

No, but they can place bombs in a container ship and make San Francisco harbor useless for quite a while. It would be a "blow against the Imperialist Dogs", symbolic and ultimately deadly to the NK leadership. SF wouldn't be destroyed, but a lot of damage near the bay and probably thousands of sick and injured civilians, deaths under 5000 at most.


you obviously no nothing about nuclear weapons. Best Korea doesn't have tactical battlefield nukes (which would cause small casualties. They would have something similar to Hiroshima or Nagasaki...you'd be talking high 5 figure deaths at a a minimum.
 
2013-03-07 09:35:16 AM

ferretman: you obviously no nothing about nuclear weapons. Best Korea doesn't have tactical battlefield nukes (which would cause small casualties. They would have something similar to Hiroshima or Nagasaki...you'd be talking high 5 figure deaths at a a minimum.


ಠ_ಠ

Have you never heard of Ohio? the midwest?
 
2013-03-07 09:35:27 AM

deanis: Theory Of Null: TheShavingofOccam123: <b><a href="http://www.fark.com/comments/7630360/82905127#c82905127" target="_blank">SubBass49</a>:</b> <i>Basically North Korea is the global version of Milton from Office Space.

[www.investitwisely.com image 300x225]

Everybody thinks his mumbling threats are full of shiat...and usually they are...but one of these days something bad will probably happen if something doesn't change.</i>

So we should drop cakes on them instead of nukes? Or big red staplers? Your strange metaphor confuses and frightens me.

/I'm just a caveman
/I will sue you and your whole crummy airline!

Drop the entire 1996 Chicago Bulls Team on them.
[www.nba.com image 350x240]

This is way off topic but there is a stunning lack of tattoos in that photo. Also, who the fark is #54 and #34? Looks like they picked those guys right out of my local YMCA.


Only if your local YMCA tends to have 7 footers running around. I'm pretty sure 34 is Bill Wennington
 
2013-03-07 09:36:40 AM

Bored Horde: tom baker's scarf: Even as a card carrying liberal (it's an expression, I don't have a card) this is the kind of statement that gets me in a bombthebastardsbecausewecan kind of mood.  We're not talking about them counterfeiting US currency, selling weapons, or producing heroin anymore.  Nuclear strike is not something you get to trot out in a pissing contest.  The consequences of that action or the threat of that action are too severe to be the plaything of a fat, petulant, hyper-privileged manboy.

[thepowerofwordss.files.wordpress.com image 450x386]

But seriously, this is what nuclear armed nations do when they get into pissing matches.  It's normal.  Hell, America has openly postured with nuclear weapons against non-nuclear nations.  America has been leading a global effort to turn the screws on the DPRK leadership in an effort to cause rebellion, making military conquest easier.  This is the logical end-game of the sanctions.

How many times has Fark called for the "glass parking lot" treatment of nations full of tens of millions of people in the middle east?  Feeling threatened because a nuclear-armed nation is posturing against America?  You'll get over it.



#1 I'm not a supporter of the Dubya, or how he dealt with other countries, or for that matter how he handled just about anything.

#2 Not advocating a glass parking lot, never have. I think the best thing to do would be to blanket the country with letter bombs that say something along the lines of "We dropped this on your house and BestestFearless Leader couldn't do a thing to stop it. Have a pleasant evening."

#3 I recognize the manboy comment applies to Dubya as well and Best Korea's BestestFearless Leader.  It was done intentionally.

#4 Posturing is one thing and nuclear brinksmanship isn't commonplace. Threatening to wipe out 100K people is how things get out of hand in a hurry.
 
2013-03-07 09:37:01 AM
Best Korea:
www.nicklasholmgren.com

They think they want our attention. They don't.
 
2013-03-07 09:37:20 AM

ferretman: MmmmBacon: GiantRex: Does North Korea even have the ability to launch a nuclear missile as far as Alaska? Let alone the mainland US. I haven't really been paying attention, but I thought that most of their stuff tended to either fizzle or blow up on the launchpad.

No, but they can place bombs in a container ship and make San Francisco harbor useless for quite a while. It would be a "blow against the Imperialist Dogs", symbolic and ultimately deadly to the NK leadership. SF wouldn't be destroyed, but a lot of damage near the bay and probably thousands of sick and injured civilians, deaths under 5000 at most.

you obviously no nothing about nuclear weapons. Best Korea doesn't have tactical battlefield nukes (which would cause small casualties. They would have something similar to Hiroshima or Nagasaki...you'd be talking high 5 figure deaths at a a minimum.


No, sorry. Stupid scenario is stupid. Really stupid, and you are stupid for not calling it stupid to its stupid face.
 
2013-03-07 09:39:04 AM

ferretman: MmmmBacon: GiantRex: Does North Korea even have the ability to launch a nuclear missile as far as Alaska? Let alone the mainland US. I haven't really been paying attention, but I thought that most of their stuff tended to either fizzle or blow up on the launchpad.

No, but they can place bombs in a container ship and make San Francisco harbor useless for quite a while. It would be a "blow against the Imperialist Dogs", symbolic and ultimately deadly to the NK leadership. SF wouldn't be destroyed, but a lot of damage near the bay and probably thousands of sick and injured civilians, deaths under 5000 at most.

you obviously no nothing about nuclear weapons. Best Korea doesn't have tactical battlefield nukes (which would cause small casualties. They would have something similar to Hiroshima or Nagasaki...you'd be talking high 5 figure deaths at a a minimum.


But don't you actually have to be sending shipments of things to a country first before you can run the nuke in a container ship gambit. They have no trade with the US, so sending a container ship to us seems a bit suspicious. Maybe they could sneak something in through China, but you'd think the Chinese would frown upon shenanigans that threaten its global trade.
 
2013-03-07 09:41:15 AM
3.bp.blogspot.com
imghumour.com
 
2013-03-07 09:41:36 AM

Mad_Radhu: ferretman: MmmmBacon: GiantRex: Does North Korea even have the ability to launch a nuclear missile as far as Alaska? Let alone the mainland US. I haven't really been paying attention, but I thought that most of their stuff tended to either fizzle or blow up on the launchpad.

No, but they can place bombs in a container ship and make San Francisco harbor useless for quite a while. It would be a "blow against the Imperialist Dogs", symbolic and ultimately deadly to the NK leadership. SF wouldn't be destroyed, but a lot of damage near the bay and probably thousands of sick and injured civilians, deaths under 5000 at most.

you obviously no nothing about nuclear weapons. Best Korea doesn't have tactical battlefield nukes (which would cause small casualties. They would have something similar to Hiroshima or Nagasaki...you'd be talking high 5 figure deaths at a a minimum.

But don't you actually have to be sending shipments of things to a country first before you can run the nuke in a container ship gambit. They have no trade with the US, so sending a container ship to us seems a bit suspicious. Maybe they could sneak something in through China, but you'd think the Chinese would frown upon shenanigans that threaten its global trade.


Only a few of the eleventhousandmillionbillion reasons why the entire "OMGZ Container ships!!11eleventy!!" scenario is so completely retarded that only the criminally stupid keep bringing it up.
 
2013-03-07 09:43:07 AM

BillCo: The only reason they continue to support them is because they know it annoys the rest of the free world.


No, look at a map.

Beijing is about 500km from China's border with North Korea. If the Koreas are ever re-united, they will probably be dominated politically by the Southern politicians, who may allow the US to station troops (or more likely short range missiles) within range of the Chinese capital.

That's the reason why China is supporting the North Korean regime.
 
2013-03-07 09:44:00 AM

deanis: <b><a href="http://www.fark.com/comments/7630360/82906000#c82906000" target="_blank">Theory Of Null</a>:</b> <i>TheShavingofOccam123: <b><a href="http://www.fark.com/comments/7630360/82905127#c82905127" target="_blank">SubBass49</a>:</b> <i>Basically North Korea is the global version of Milton from Office Space.

[www.investitwisely.com image 300x225]

Everybody thinks his mumbling threats are full of shiat...and usually they are...but one of these days something bad will probably happen if something doesn't change.</i>

So we should drop cakes on them instead of nukes? Or big red staplers? Your strange metaphor confuses and frightens me.

/I'm just a caveman
/I will sue you and your whole crummy airline!

Drop the entire 1996 Chicago Bulls Team on them.
[www.nba.com image 350x240]</i>

This is way off topic but there is a stunning lack of tattoos in that photo. Also, who the fark is #54 and #34? Looks like they picked those guys right out of my local YMCA.



34 Bill Wennington was the center. 54 was just some dude named Jack.
 
2013-03-07 09:44:28 AM
well there's some spicy kim-chi.
 
2013-03-07 09:45:11 AM
Unidentified Spokesman?  Who, Kyong Lee in farming village #347?
 
2013-03-07 09:45:46 AM

Danack: BillCo: The only reason they continue to support them is because they know it annoys the rest of the free world.

No, look at a map.

Beijing is about 500km from China's border with North Korea. If the Koreas are ever re-united, they will probably be dominated politically by the Southern politicians, who may allow the US to station troops (or more likely short range missiles) within range of the Chinese capital.

That's the reason why China is supporting the North Korean regime.


Uh, look at that map again, and realize that Seoul is just about as close already.
 
2013-03-07 09:45:47 AM
For a long time, the US feared the Soviets would detonate a nuclear device underwater in New York harbor.

The resulting tsunami would have scraped most of NYC bare.

nctr.pmel.noaa.gov
 
2013-03-07 09:46:03 AM
Is there psychedelics in the water over there? Or has the food shortage finally reached the upper levels of their society?
 
2013-03-07 09:46:40 AM
if north korea nukes washington, or if anyone nukes washington really...  Does that mean we can stop paying federal taxes?
 
2013-03-07 09:47:47 AM

Mad_Radhu: ferretman: MmmmBacon: GiantRex: Does North Korea even have the ability to launch a nuclear missile as far as Alaska? Let alone the mainland US. I haven't really been paying attention, but I thought that most of their stuff tended to either fizzle or blow up on the launchpad.

No, but they can place bombs in a container ship and make San Francisco harbor useless for quite a while. It would be a "blow against the Imperialist Dogs", symbolic and ultimately deadly to the NK leadership. SF wouldn't be destroyed, but a lot of damage near the bay and probably thousands of sick and injured civilians, deaths under 5000 at most.

you obviously no nothing about nuclear weapons. Best Korea doesn't have tactical battlefield nukes (which would cause small casualties. They would have something similar to Hiroshima or Nagasaki...you'd be talking high 5 figure deaths at a a minimum.

But don't you actually have to be sending shipments of things to a country first before you can run the nuke in a container ship gambit. They have no trade with the US, so sending a container ship to us seems a bit suspicious. Maybe they could sneak something in through China, but you'd think the Chinese would frown upon shenanigans that threaten its global trade.


I'd figure China would be monitoring for radiation as well in their shipping hubs, unless they secretly sponsored doing this... which would be economic suicide for them, not to mention if it traced back would be even more suicidal...

Chinese leadership isn't interested in suicide, unlike their NK pets are...
 
2013-03-07 09:47:55 AM

Theory Of Null: shiat could get real. His father wasn't this stupid.


I blame video games and soda pop.


It may be stupid, but you have to wonder if Man-boy here is trying to show he's more of a boss than his daddy and grand-daddy. He may be so totally convinced of his nation's superiority that he truthfully feels that he can push the world around and come out standing on top.
 
2013-03-07 09:48:05 AM

Danack: BillCo: The only reason they continue to support them is because they know it annoys the rest of the free world.

No, look at a map.

Beijing is about 500km from China's border with North Korea. If the Koreas are ever re-united, they will probably be dominated politically by the Southern politicians, who may allow the US to station troops (or more likely short range missiles) within range of the Chinese capital.

That's the reason why China is supporting the North Korean regime.


If Korea were to reunite, the most likely result is far fewer US troops there, not more.
 
2013-03-07 09:48:07 AM

AverageAmericanGuy: Thanks, Dubya. Pre-emptive strikes as foreign policy were a really great idea.

NOT.


Congratulations. This is the first "I blame Bush" whine I've seen in at least a month or so. We need more people like you to stay on point and keep old and busted memes alive and well. Seriously, do you actually think you can keep it going until 2016? Please respond; serious bet money is riding on it.
 
2013-03-07 09:48:53 AM

ferretman: MmmmBacon: GiantRex: Does North Korea even have the ability to launch a nuclear missile as far as Alaska? Let alone the mainland US. I haven't really been paying attention, but I thought that most of their stuff tended to either fizzle or blow up on the launchpad.

No, but they can place bombs in a container ship and make San Francisco harbor useless for quite a while. It would be a "blow against the Imperialist Dogs", symbolic and ultimately deadly to the NK leadership. SF wouldn't be destroyed, but a lot of damage near the bay and probably thousands of sick and injured civilians, deaths under 5000 at most.

you obviously no nothing about nuclear weapons. Best Korea doesn't have tactical battlefield nukes (which would cause small casualties. They would have something similar to Hiroshima or Nagasaki...you'd be talking high 5 figure deaths at a a minimum.


Here's your scenario mapped out.  I was generous and gave them a 25 kT bomb (larger than anything they've tested so far) smuggled into the harbor in San Francisco and detonated on a docked ship.  You'd probably lose a few city blocks around the immediate blast area and have a lot of broken windows but it wouldn't be the conflagration you're making it out to be, especially in a major West Coast city with earthquake-hardened buildings.  Sure people would be killed and everybody would be pissed off but we wouldn't lose a city by any stretch of the imagination.

http://meyerweb.com/eric/tools/gmap/hydesim.html?dll=37.80437,-122.3 96 58&yd=25&zm=11&op=156
 
2013-03-07 09:48:55 AM

mytdawg: Well crap, India and China are going all first world on us so we're gonna need to take over NK in order to find enough warm bodies to manufacture some cheap shiat for us for a generation or two.  We're not gonna stand around and watch him exploit his people when our conglomerates could be profiting from their misery.  Walmart needs some more dollar towels and tires.

Come at us bro.


Walmart has dollar tires? I'm outta here, time get a fresh set.
 
2013-03-07 09:51:32 AM
i280.photobucket.com
 
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