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(The Raw Story)   Salem, Missouri librarian fails to prove ducks and Wiccan websites weigh the same for Federal judge   (rawstory.com) divider line 27
    More: Ironic, Wiccan, Missouri, federal judges  
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9362 clicks; posted to Main » on 07 Mar 2013 at 2:23 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



Voting Results (Funniest)
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Archived thread
2013-03-07 03:09:21 AM
5 votes:
By and large, nearly every Wiccan woman I've ever met is bi and large.
2013-03-07 02:33:18 AM
5 votes:

Weaver95: i'm kinda pissed off that a librarian would block wiccan websites at all.  they're probably the LEAST harmful sites on the 'net.  WTF man?


It's all the sex inherent in Wicca and neo-Paganism.  The Great Rite, fertility goddesses, Dionysus, Charge of the Goddess, skyclad rites, acceptance of homosexuality, being generally sex-positive.  All that stuff leads to dancing!
2013-03-07 03:08:32 AM
4 votes:

phalamir: fusillade762: The ACLU filed a lawsuit against the Salem Public Library

BURN THEM!

No one was burned in Salem.  They hung them


No one was hung in Salem. They all had small penises.

/hanged
2013-03-07 02:26:24 AM
3 votes:
The ACLU filed a lawsuit against the Salem Public Library

BURN THEM!
2013-03-07 01:02:30 AM
3 votes:
It's a fair cop
2013-03-07 04:16:33 AM
2 votes:

Pribar: "The Salem Public Library will be a reliable resource center and an advocate of intellectual freedom for the community "


Remember, we're talking about people who believe that "Freedom of religion" means "Free to pick any flavour of far-right evangelical Christianity" and that "Separation of church and state" means "YOU MUST CONSTRUCT ADDITIONAL JESUS."
2013-03-07 02:50:54 AM
2 votes:

phalamir: fusillade762: The ACLU filed a lawsuit against the Salem Public Library

BURN THEM!

No one was burned in Salem.  They hung them


I knew that. But "HANG THEM!" just doesn't have the same ring to it.
2013-03-07 02:39:14 AM
2 votes:
What the residents of Salem, MO might look like:

encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com
2013-03-07 02:31:41 AM
2 votes:

SpdrJay: Ah, the southern states...


Not sure if troll, Alaskan, or bad at geography.
2013-03-07 02:30:05 AM
2 votes:

Weaver95: i'm kinda pissed off that a librarian would block wiccan websites at all.  they're probably the LEAST harmful sites on the 'net.  WTF man?


Because it's the religion of the DEVIL, you sick loincloth-wearin' goat-sacrificin' deerhumper!
2013-03-07 12:43:39 PM
1 votes:

The Southern Dandy: I happen to be a direct descendant of both the official Minister, and the principal law enforcement officer of the Salem witch trials, so watch your step, heathen farkers!


Ha ha, you'll never catch me!
2013-03-07 10:21:52 AM
1 votes:

Somacandra: If you're classifying Amerindian religions as "occult" and you're a librarian, you need a serious punch in the gonads to begin with because there is no possible rational way to attach those two topics together. Quanah Parker and Cornelius Agrippa may have both been carbon-based life forms, but any similarity ends there.


It ... is occult.   Simple test: is it about magic and/or the super- or para- natural?  That is, anything which cannot be explained or caused within our knowledge of the natural laws?  Then it's occult.

Who falls into this group?  Wiccan beliefs, American Indian spirits, alchemy, acupuncture, chiropracty, homeopathic medicine, oh, and every major and minor mythology system out there including Christianity and the Flying Spaghetti Monster.

To be fair, I think it makes some sense to block access to this information to children, as it could cause them irreparable harm.
2013-03-07 08:07:53 AM
1 votes:

GWSuperfan: Yeah, way to violate not only federal law, but the standards of your governing professional organization, the ALA.

/Librarian sounds like she needs a swift kick in the coont.


THIS

i548.photobucket.com

/sounds like she needs to turn in *puts on sunglasses* her librarian card
2013-03-07 06:07:55 AM
1 votes:

algrant33: You idiots are thinking of the Missouri Compromise.


mens-haircuts.net

Missouri Compromise?
2013-03-07 04:38:24 AM
1 votes:

Aquapope: Krieghund: SpdrJay: Ah, the southern states...

Not sure if troll, Alaskan, or bad at geography.

Missouri was on the Confederate side (the South).  Maybe he meant south politically, not geographically.


These days, the 3/5ths Compromise now means that if you aren't a business owner, you're 3/5ths of a constituent.  This also means that not being a business owner is about the same as being the wrong race.
2013-03-07 04:33:29 AM
1 votes:

LincolnLogolas: By and large, nearly every Wiccan woman I've ever met is bi and large.




The GIS for 'wiccan woman' returns art like this...

lh3.ggpht.com

But pictures of actual women like this...

studentwork.hss.uts.edu.au

So, while you may be right I think the sex may be worth the hex!
2013-03-07 04:20:28 AM
1 votes:

Alphax: I heard there were some minor Civil War battles in Missouri, but they may have been entirely locals fighting each other. I sorta remember vising a Civil War battle reenactment at Pilot Knob, Missouri, about a hundred miles south of St. Louis, when I was a teen in the 80's.


Yeah, there were some civil war battles down there.  More as you get toward the boot heel area.  Even today they're a racist bunch of farkwads.  But still, there were pro/anti slavery attacks from both sides over here on the MO/KS border.  Kansas burned up lots of Missouri, then they returned the favor.  Then we trashed a couple of towns and they did the same.  I miss them in the Big 12.  It had history.
2013-03-07 04:18:49 AM
1 votes:

Fluorescent Testicle: "YOU MUST CONSTRUCT ADDITIONAL JESUS."


Yes, I read that in a Protoss voice.
2013-03-07 04:03:27 AM
1 votes:
content8.flixster.com
2013-03-07 03:46:36 AM
1 votes:
I happen to be a direct descendant of both the official Minister, and the principal law enforcement officer of the Salem witch trials, so watch your step, heathen farkers!
2013-03-07 02:44:57 AM
1 votes:

AverageAmericanGuy: U.S. District Judge E. Richard Webber said Tuesday the library could only block websites labelled "adult image," "pornography," "phishing," "proxy anonymizer," "viruses," or "web chat."

Reminds me of
Group W's where they put you if you may not be moral enough to join the armyafter committing your special crime, and there was all kinds of mean nasty uglylooking people on the bench there. Mother rapers. Father stabbers. Fatherrapers! Father rapers sitting right there on the bench next to me! Andthey was mean and nasty and ugly and horrible crime-type guys sitting on thebench next to me. And the meanest, ugliest, nastiest one, the meanestfather raper of them all, was coming over to me and he was mean 'n' ugly'n' nasty 'n' horrible and all kind of things and he sat down next to meand said, "Kid, whad'ya get?" I said, "I didn't get nothing, I had to pay$50 and pick up the garbage." He said, "What were you arrested for, kid?"And I said, "Littering."



And causing a public nuisance.
2013-03-07 02:44:07 AM
1 votes:
I work in a library, so I'm getting a kick...

We draw the line at kiddie pron.  Even then, it isn't blocked, we just call the cops and let them deal with you.
2013-03-07 02:43:19 AM
1 votes:
U.S. District Judge E. Richard Webber said Tuesday the library could only block websites labelled "adult image," "pornography," "phishing," "proxy anonymizer," "viruses," or "web chat."

Reminds me of
Group W's where they put you if you may not be moral enough to join the armyafter committing your special crime, and there was all kinds of mean nasty uglylooking people on the bench there. Mother rapers. Father stabbers. Fatherrapers! Father rapers sitting right there on the bench next to me! Andthey was mean and nasty and ugly and horrible crime-type guys sitting on thebench next to me. And the meanest, ugliest, nastiest one, the meanestfather raper of them all, was coming over to me and he was mean 'n' ugly'n' nasty 'n' horrible and all kind of things and he sat down next to meand said, "Kid, whad'ya get?" I said, "I didn't get nothing, I had to pay$50 and pick up the garbage." He said, "What were you arrested for, kid?"And I said, "Littering."
2013-03-07 02:39:25 AM
1 votes:

MadCat221: Weaver95: i'm kinda pissed off that a librarian would block wiccan websites at all.  they're probably the LEAST harmful sites on the 'net.  WTF man?

Because it's the religion of the DEVIL, you sick loincloth-wearin' goat-sacrificin' deerhumper!


www.ted.me

FOOSBALL IS THE DEVIL, BOBBEH.
2013-03-07 02:26:51 AM
1 votes:
Ah, the southern states...

where aggressive ignorance is a point of pride and honor.
2013-03-07 01:15:51 AM
1 votes:
i'm kinda pissed off that a librarian would block wiccan websites at all.  they're probably the LEAST harmful sites on the 'net.  WTF man?
2013-03-07 12:14:17 AM
1 votes:
You can't research viruses at the library?  That seems improper.
 
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