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(The Raw Story)   Salem, Missouri librarian fails to prove ducks and Wiccan websites weigh the same for Federal judge   (rawstory.com) divider line 100
    More: Ironic, Wiccan, Missouri, federal judges  
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9370 clicks; posted to Main » on 07 Mar 2013 at 2:23 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-03-07 04:10:24 AM  

Abacus9: In fact Detroit is the only city in the whole country where you have to go south to get to Canada.


Except for the cities north of Detroit.  Or maybe parts of Alaska.
 
2013-03-07 04:12:06 AM  

LincolnLogolas: By and large, nearly every Wiccan woman I've ever met is bi and large.


small hands. smell like cabbage.
 
2013-03-07 04:16:33 AM  

Pribar: "The Salem Public Library will be a reliable resource center and an advocate of intellectual freedom for the community "


Remember, we're talking about people who believe that "Freedom of religion" means "Free to pick any flavour of far-right evangelical Christianity" and that "Separation of church and state" means "YOU MUST CONSTRUCT ADDITIONAL JESUS."
 
2013-03-07 04:16:41 AM  
Librarian sounds like she's scared of things she was told to be scared of.
 
2013-03-07 04:18:49 AM  

Fluorescent Testicle: "YOU MUST CONSTRUCT ADDITIONAL JESUS."


Yes, I read that in a Protoss voice.
 
2013-03-07 04:20:28 AM  

Alphax: I heard there were some minor Civil War battles in Missouri, but they may have been entirely locals fighting each other. I sorta remember vising a Civil War battle reenactment at Pilot Knob, Missouri, about a hundred miles south of St. Louis, when I was a teen in the 80's.


Yeah, there were some civil war battles down there.  More as you get toward the boot heel area.  Even today they're a racist bunch of farkwads.  But still, there were pro/anti slavery attacks from both sides over here on the MO/KS border.  Kansas burned up lots of Missouri, then they returned the favor.  Then we trashed a couple of towns and they did the same.  I miss them in the Big 12.  It had history.
 
2013-03-07 04:20:39 AM  

algrant33: Salem, MO is a tiny hick town of about 4,000.  It contains a Wal-Mart Distribution Center and a prison.  Those are literally the only two industries in the town.  It's otherwise surrounded by farms and meth producers.

The closest biggish town is 30 miles away in Rolla, MO, a town of about 18,000 which is perhaps most well-known for its engineering school.  Several Farkers went to school there.  I am one of them.  Even with the high-paying university jobs, median HOUSEHOLD income in Rolla, MO hovers at around $26,000/yr.

The librarian is a farking hick, is all I'm saying.


There's worse than Salem in Missouri.   I grew up in a wide spot in the road called Gainesville, at the time I graduated HS, (1995) the town had ~700 people, 4 major last names, and about 20 different churches.
Oh, and the nearest Wal-mart was 30 miles away as of my leaving the state.  Town fathers didn't want the city to grow so refused to let Sam Walton build there

We're talking the kind of town with a school system whose computer network was 10 years old at the time, the science textbooks referred to the moon landing as "planned for the near future", but yeah we had a state of the art basketball gymnasium and a varsity team that repeatedly made it to state.

And speaking of the librarian at the school...  this is the woman who, on the principal saying she couldn't simply ban one type of game from the library (there was a D&D group that met there, as well as magic the gathering, chess and more) banned all gaming of any kind.   That is, in between going through every copy of national Geographic that the school had and taking scissors to any 'smut'.

TL;DR, This freaky hillbilly "god warrior" doesn't surprise me in the least.

/Could be worse
//Went to a baptist college
///Their -single- copy of Fellowship of the ring was defaced with graffiti saying that Gandalf was really an agent of satan and that frodo should have prayed to god.
////Librarian actually said he put that there.
//Slashies Uber Alles
 
2013-03-07 04:24:27 AM  

Aquapope: Abacus9: In fact Detroit is the only city in the whole country where you have to go south to get to Canada.

Except for the cities north of Detroit.


Nope. To cross into Canada, you have to be in a border city. You may have to go south to get to a border city, but Detroit is the only one in which you travel south to reach Canada.

Aquapope: Or maybe parts of Alaska.


Not sure, but I don't think so. Besides, I was only referring to American cities (I keed, I keed).
 
2013-03-07 04:27:26 AM  

HotWingAgenda: andychrist420: HotWingAgenda: Krieghund: SpdrJay: Ah, the southern states...

Not sure if troll, Alaskan, or bad at geography.

Missouri is in the southern half of the United States, although it's classified as Mid-West.  It borders on Arkansas, Tennessee and Kentucky, after all.

Does that make Michigan part of Canada?

Why would the fact that Missouri is in the south make Michigan part of another country?


It's right next to it.  I'm just using the same logic that puts Missouri in the south. Missouri was never part of the Confederacy IIRC.
 
2013-03-07 04:29:01 AM  
I didnt expect a Farker's geographical ignorance to evolve into an enjoyable discussion on Civil War history.
 
2013-03-07 04:33:29 AM  

LincolnLogolas: By and large, nearly every Wiccan woman I've ever met is bi and large.




The GIS for 'wiccan woman' returns art like this...

lh3.ggpht.com

But pictures of actual women like this...

studentwork.hss.uts.edu.au

So, while you may be right I think the sex may be worth the hex!
 
2013-03-07 04:38:24 AM  

Aquapope: Krieghund: SpdrJay: Ah, the southern states...

Not sure if troll, Alaskan, or bad at geography.

Missouri was on the Confederate side (the South).  Maybe he meant south politically, not geographically.


These days, the 3/5ths Compromise now means that if you aren't a business owner, you're 3/5ths of a constituent.  This also means that not being a business owner is about the same as being the wrong race.
 
2013-03-07 05:31:36 AM  
We shall use my larger scales
 
2013-03-07 05:47:03 AM  

Rufus Lee King: SpdrJay: Ah, the southern states...

where aggressive ignorance is a point of pride and honor.

Gee, I dunno, Beav.

[www.nwmissouri.edu image 452x280]


See you and raise you the handy dandy map here.

isthereagod.files.wordpress.com
 
2013-03-07 05:56:06 AM  

LincolnLogolas: By and large, nearly every Wiccan woman I've ever met is bi and large.


I see what you did there, clever.
 
2013-03-07 05:58:24 AM  

phalamir: fusillade762: The ACLU filed a lawsuit against the Salem Public Library

BURN THEM!

No one was burned in Salem.  They hung them


"More weight."
 
2013-03-07 06:03:29 AM  

gibbon1: See you and raise you the handy dandy map here.


Hmm, so are those Indians in OK Baptists?  Just wondering.
 
2013-03-07 06:05:55 AM  

LincolnLogolas: By and large, nearly every Wiccan woman I've ever met is bi and large.


This.

\date a Wiccan, she's neither
 
2013-03-07 06:07:55 AM  

algrant33: You idiots are thinking of the Missouri Compromise.


mens-haircuts.net

Missouri Compromise?
 
2013-03-07 06:23:05 AM  

MmmmBacon: I see what you did there, clever.


If by "Clever" you mean "Posted on every Wicca thread since the Usenet days," then sure, clever.
 
2013-03-07 06:44:10 AM  

LincolnLogolas: By and large, nearly every Wiccan woman I've ever met is bi and large.


You should get out more. Pagan festivals are a great time, usually involving massive quantities of alcohol and/or more illicit substances.
 
2013-03-07 07:09:30 AM  

thisispete: As a librarian - albeit in a university (although I was a library assistant in a public library) - I look very sternly on censorship in libraries. It's not up to us to make those kinds of judgments, and betraying the principles behind free access to information tarnishes the profession as a whole. For decades librarians have tried to get rid of the image of the petty authoritarian censorious shusher. This kind of thing doesn't help.


I'm the librarian for a Catholic high school and even I wouldn't try and censor wicca, native spirituality or anything of the type. I have to put up with some system wide censorship (designed because some of the schools in our network don't want the net to be a distraction full of fun things). But the school allows me to have an unfiltered PC on my desk, so that if anyone needs something which is accidentally blocked I can get it.
Back when I was in public libraries the rule was nothing with a visual which would have been classified MA15+ if it was in print. And that was not about censorship, but about the legality of having such images in a public space where they could be viewed by people under 15 (or by people who just wouldn't want to see it). And it wasn't a mindless automated filter that made the decision, it was the staff who would give someone a tap on the shoulder and tell them it was inappropriate.
That said, I did actually do some censorship myself yesterday. Not the simple decision not to buy a book, but I discovered we had a copy of David Irving'shiatler's War on the shelves. Given that we have a lot of kids for whom English is not their first language, I suspected they might not have the skills to evaluate Irving's idea that Hitler wasn't such a bad bloke after all. Even then, there was no book burning. The book has simply been relocated to the history faculty office, where the teachers can use it with the more advanced history students.
 
2013-03-07 07:29:18 AM  

Rufus Lee King: Rufus Lee King: Sudo_Make_Me_A_Sandwich: LincolnLogolas: By and large, nearly every Wiccan woman I've ever met is bi and large.

You should get out more. Pagan festivals are a great time, usually involving massive quantities of alcohol and/or more illicit substances.

Yeah, from what I've read, they seem like a lot of fun. I could dig attending one.

I forgot to ask: I assume you Wiccan types are tolerant of us Discordians?

[i209.photobucket.com image 350x350]


Most of the Wiccans I know are also Popes, including myself. So, essentially, yes.
 
2013-03-07 08:07:53 AM  

GWSuperfan: Yeah, way to violate not only federal law, but the standards of your governing professional organization, the ALA.

/Librarian sounds like she needs a swift kick in the coont.


THIS

i548.photobucket.com

/sounds like she needs to turn in *puts on sunglasses* her librarian card
 
2013-03-07 08:35:59 AM  

FizixJunkee: Somacandra: If you're classifying Amerindian religions as "occult" and you're a librarian, you need a serious punch in the gonads to begin with because there is no possible rational way to attach those two topics together. Quanah Parker and Cornelius Agrippa may have both been carbon-based life forms, but any similarity ends there.


I bet the lady is a librarian in name only (e.g., she doesn't have any real credentials).  All the real librarians---those well-read and intelligent folks with Master's degrees in library science---I've known are quite liberal and open-minded about things.


It's a town of 5,000 people in the Ozarks. Also the county seat. Very likely.
 
2013-03-07 08:38:08 AM  
Wait a minute.  One aspect of this story is not being discussed enough in this thread:

Who are these mysterious "proper authorities" that this woman supposedly reported people to?  It is not illegal to research the funeral practices of Native Americans, so who did she report people's browsing habits to?

/what a boring life she must lead that she thinks that it is alright to track what people do online in a public library
 
2013-03-07 08:52:44 AM  
Most librarians are liberal, freedom of speech, pro-sex types. I wonder if local politics were at play here.

\librarian
 
2013-03-07 09:32:57 AM  

algrant33: Salem, MO is a tiny hick town of about 4,000.  It contains a Wal-Mart Distribution Center and a prison.  Those are literally the only two industries in the town.  It's otherwise surrounded by farms and meth producers.

The closest biggish town is 30 miles away in Rolla, MO, a town of about 18,000 which is perhaps most well-known for its engineering school.  Several Farkers went to school there.  I am one of them.  Even with the high-paying university jobs, median HOUSEHOLD income in Rolla, MO hovers at around $26,000/yr.

The librarian is a farking hick, is all I'm saying.




The Wal-Mart warehouse is in St James 30 miles away. While Salem residents may drive there it's not in Salem. The prison is in Licking which is south of Houston in Texas county roughly 40 miles away. Most jobs in Salem center around logging and trout fishing.
 
2013-03-07 09:37:55 AM  

Alphax: Aquapope: Krieghund: SpdrJay: Ah, the southern states...

Not sure if troll, Alaskan, or bad at geography.

Missouri was on the Confederate side (the South).  Maybe he meant south politically, not geographically.

Incorrect.  It was one of 3 border states where slavery was legal, but they didn't join the Confederacy.  The other two were Maryland and Kentucky, IIRC.




Incorrect! The legitimate legislative bodies passed a bill to break away from the union. However, the federal government forced it and the governor in to exile. Then the Feds gave Missouri a military governor.
 
2013-03-07 10:05:33 AM  
The Ozarks aren't much different than the tribal mountain regions of Afghanistan and Pakistan, they just have better infrastructure.
 
2013-03-07 10:08:23 AM  

Taylor Mental: The Ozarks aren't much different than the tribal mountain regions of Afghanistan and Pakistan, they just have better infrastructure.


Citation please.

/Sorta kidding ; )
 
2013-03-07 10:15:31 AM  

Mid_mo_mad_man: Incorrect! The legitimate legislative bodies passed a bill to break away from the union. However, the federal government forced it and the governor in to exile. Then the Feds gave Missouri a military governor.


Know how I know you're from Neosho?

The elected government convened a Constitutional Convention to discuss amending Missouri's Constitution to allow for secession, which wasn't permitted under the existing law. They adjourned without doing anything of the sort, leaving Gov. Claiborne Jackson and the legislature without the authority to secede. Then the whole Nathaniel Lyon - Sterling Price explosion happened, when Lyon, who was a hothead, maneuvered all the adults out of the room and proceeded to make an ass of himself, forcing the hand of the southern sympathizers, who'd been willing to keep the peace to that point. Once that happened, the situation quickly deteriorated, and the elected government took to their heels, running from the Army, culminating in the Battle of Wilson's Creek (which finally got rid of Lyon, but too late to do any good).

The elected legislature reconvened in Neosho and passed a secession bill, but it was too late - the Constitutional Convention had reconvened and kicked them all out of office. Besides, there's doubts that there were even enough of them down there to have a quorum - they were basically a rump on the run who passed a bill only after they'd already rebelled. So, after the Constitutional Convention expelled them from office and held new elections, they were no longer the legitimate government and the secession bill they passed had no effect.
 
2013-03-07 10:19:49 AM  
TIL I'm Southern. Help me.
 
2013-03-07 10:21:52 AM  

Somacandra: If you're classifying Amerindian religions as "occult" and you're a librarian, you need a serious punch in the gonads to begin with because there is no possible rational way to attach those two topics together. Quanah Parker and Cornelius Agrippa may have both been carbon-based life forms, but any similarity ends there.


It ... is occult.   Simple test: is it about magic and/or the super- or para- natural?  That is, anything which cannot be explained or caused within our knowledge of the natural laws?  Then it's occult.

Who falls into this group?  Wiccan beliefs, American Indian spirits, alchemy, acupuncture, chiropracty, homeopathic medicine, oh, and every major and minor mythology system out there including Christianity and the Flying Spaghetti Monster.

To be fair, I think it makes some sense to block access to this information to children, as it could cause them irreparable harm.
 
2013-03-07 10:53:10 AM  

tinfoil-hat maggie: Taylor Mental: The Ozarks aren't much different than the tribal mountain regions of Afghanistan and Pakistan, they just have better infrastructure.

Citation please.

/Sorta kidding ; )


Just a personal observation from getting to know people from the area as well as traveling through it. I once broke down while driving through the Ozarks to my home in Kansas City and this really nice guy pulled over and offered to give me a ride up to the next town. While we were driving all he did was talk about Jesus and how evil the federal government was. I tried to be nice but it was creepy. It was the same area some of those notorious insurrectionists had a compound. Then he turned off the highway and went down a long dirt road, told me he had to give his wife some stuff before going on to town.

When we got to his house he asked me to stay for dinner and started explaining how he needed help around the farm for his business. I'm like no, I have to get home. And he kept making excuses to avoid taking me to town, so I just finally walked out of there and hitchhiked. When I got a ride the guy asked where I was going, where I was coming from, etc. When I told him he said, man, you're way off the main road. Turned out that crazy religious farker had drove all the way over into another county while I was asleep.

There have been instances in the past where these hillbillies pick up stranded motorists or hitch hikers and force them into servitude. I know, it sounds crazy, but it's no different than the "good Samaritan" who offers help with a flat in the city but robs you instead. What they all have in common is they think the federal government is making everyone lazy, and they are entitled to cheap/slave labor because the Bible says so.

Oh, and if you go to their church they always seem to have snakes in a box.
 
2013-03-07 10:57:02 AM  

Somacandra: If you're classifying Amerindian religions as "occult" and you're a librarian, you need a serious punch in the gonads to begin with because there is no possible rational way to attach those two topics together. Quanah Parker and Cornelius Agrippa may have both been carbon-based life forms, but any similarity ends there.


Ummm, it's Missouri?  Sure, it's a step up from Mississippi, but then Mississippi is a step down from the Stone Age, so that's not saying much.
 
2013-03-07 11:08:28 AM  
Being from Salem, I'm getting a kick out of these replies...


algrant33: Salem, MO is a tiny hick town of about 4,000.  It contains a Wal-Mart Distribution Center and a prison.  Those are literally the only two industries in the town.  It's otherwise surrounded by farms and meth producers.

The closest biggish town is 30 miles away in Rolla, MO, a town of about 18,000 which is perhaps most well-known for its engineering school.  Several Farkers went to school there.  I am one of them.  Even with the high-paying university jobs, median HOUSEHOLD income in Rolla, MO hovers at around $26,000/yr.

The librarian is a farking hick, is all I'm saying.


There is no Wal-mart distro center, its a supercenter, and there is no prision, just a hospital and a few chain resturants.  Oh and the population is about 5k, not 4 and Salem's median hosehold income is 28k, and Rolla's is 29.9k.  Also, there have been ZERO reported drug labs in that area since 2000, Holister , MO is where the meth is.  Little things, but they matter to those in the area.
 
2013-03-07 11:09:25 AM  

illannoyin: LincolnLogolas: By and large, nearly every Wiccan woman I've ever met is bi and large.

The GIS for 'wiccan woman' returns art like this...

[lh3.ggpht.com image 500x473]

But pictures of actual women like this...

[studentwork.hss.uts.edu.au image 251x350]

So, while you may be right I think the sex may be worth the hex!


That's pretty smokin' for a Wiccan.
 
2013-03-07 11:11:10 AM  

Rufus Lee King: Rufus Lee King: Sudo_Make_Me_A_Sandwich: LincolnLogolas: By and large, nearly every Wiccan woman I've ever met is bi and large.

You should get out more. Pagan festivals are a great time, usually involving massive quantities of alcohol and/or more illicit substances.

Yeah, from what I've read, they seem like a lot of fun. I could dig attending one.

I forgot to ask: I assume you Wiccan types are tolerant of us Discordians?

[i209.photobucket.com image 350x350]


How do you enforce that "No Rules Enforced" rule?
 
2013-03-07 11:14:28 AM  

tinfoil-hat maggie: Taylor Mental: The Ozarks aren't much different than the tribal mountain regions of Afghanistan and Pakistan, they just have better infrastructure.

Citation please.

/Sorta kidding ; )


That's a fair argument.  Ozark infrastructure isn't that much to write home about.
 
2013-03-07 11:56:26 AM  
This is the part that scares me the most:

The library director allegedly also said she had an "obligation" to call the "proper authorities" to report people who wanted to view blocked websites.

I'm reminded of something I read recently regarding the Gestapo in WWII-era Germany: The local offices did not actually engage in the sort of stealth and spying that one would expect of secret police. They didn't have the time to, because their available time and manpower were occupied almost exclusively by local citizens denouncing each other. Apparently people were practically tripping over each other to report others to the secret police. We like to think "it could never happen here" -- but it just did.
 
2013-03-07 12:01:31 PM  

Rufus Lee King: SpdrJay: Ah, the southern states...

where aggressive ignorance is a point of pride and honor.

Gee, I dunno, Beav.

[www.nwmissouri.edu image 452x280]


There's only one response to that kind of insult

F*** You
 
amo [TotalFark]
2013-03-07 12:12:18 PM  

algrant33: Jeff


You know how I know where you're from? ;)

/former Jaybird

Alphax: I heard there were some minor Civil War battles in Missouri, but they may have been entirely locals fighting each other.  I sorta remember vising a Civil War battle reenactment at Pilot Knob, Missouri, about a hundred miles south of St. Louis, when I was a teen in the 80's.


There were minor battles, but there were several major ones, and all of them put together they accounted for close to 20% of all Civil War battles. Only Virginia and Tennessee had more battles than Missouri.
 
2013-03-07 12:43:39 PM  

The Southern Dandy: I happen to be a direct descendant of both the official Minister, and the principal law enforcement officer of the Salem witch trials, so watch your step, heathen farkers!


Ha ha, you'll never catch me!
 
2013-03-07 01:03:52 PM  

Rreal: There's worse than Salem in Missouri.


Cuba.

/FARK Cuba
 
2013-03-07 02:17:54 PM  
No, you idiot 'librarian', you cannot block sites just because they're teh icky pagan heathens who will turn your chickens gay. Goddamn, some people are stupid.

/Pagan
//Fairly used to this
///CSS: Weirdest moment of my life was when I was at my mom's friends' house (we were on vacation, they're long-distance friends so we kids all got kicked out to the rather nice rec room while they chatted) and the youngest kid walks up and asks "what's your religion?". Naturally I answer "Pagan", because yes, I am, and I swear the other kids looked like I'd murdered someone. o.O
////Seriously, don't become Pagan unless you have a high tolerance for really weird, stupid-based shiat. Weird, stupid-based shiat happens a lot.
//You get great stories to tell the grandkids.
 
2013-03-07 03:27:59 PM  

stevetherobot: How do you enforce that "No Rules Enforced" rule?


And thus is the paradox that leads to freedom.  Or a headache.  Enlightenment does may your eyes go crossed.
 
2013-03-07 05:05:12 PM  
A librarian removed the D&D material so generously donated. Her and I had a chat about that. I made it clear that she was basing her choices - as a state employee - on her religious views. The stuff went back up.
 
2013-03-07 06:11:16 PM  

Abacus9: [upload.wikimedia.org image 640x360]

Seriously though, a lot of Michigan IS like Canada. In fact Detroit is the only city in the whole country where you have to go south to get to Canada.


Now that RTW got ramrodded, the jurisdiction of Hell, MI now includes the entire state.
 
2013-03-08 02:57:29 PM  
It is Salem, let's give them a trial period.
Ahh, Arkansas, the state that gave us Bubba and Hilary.
 
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