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(The Consumerist)   Southwest Airlines mails back lost cell phone, provides outstanding service and terrible poetry   (consumerist.com) divider line 31
    More: Amusing, southwest, poems, cell phones  
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3190 clicks; posted to Business » on 06 Mar 2013 at 5:38 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



31 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2013-03-06 05:17:16 PM
It's the thought that counts? Bad, bad poem.
 
2013-03-06 05:45:50 PM
Vogons are now working for Southwest Airlines?
 
2013-03-06 05:52:03 PM

RedPhoenix122: Vogons are now working for Southwest Airlines?


Oh slobbering gnaflax on leisurely recreations
Towards skinking floggasms on unfit bowels
Locating misplaced unit of howling indignations
Retrievals unto straggling corporate minion hells
 
2013-03-06 06:03:52 PM
Not surprised given this is from the same airline that brings you seat gambling and higher prices.
 
2013-03-06 06:07:59 PM

RedPhoenix122: Vogons are now working for Southwest Airlines?


I've never had to fill out anything in triplicate when flying on Southwest, so clearly they're not Vogons. Perhaps they're the Azgoths of Kria?
 
2013-03-06 06:35:29 PM
Read worse.  hell I wrote worse in High school.
 
2013-03-06 06:44:11 PM
I left an iPad in a seat pocket on a Southwest flight (derp), they mailed it back to me like two weeks later.  No poetry, but I got my iPad back.

And a little bit of my faith in humanity.
 
2013-03-06 06:55:33 PM

sethstorm: Not surprised given this is from the same airline that brings you seat gambling and higher prices.


www.troll.me
 
2013-03-06 06:57:16 PM

DrVoice: And a little bit of my faith in humanity.


Based on where I now live - Southwest is really the only option for direct flights to most places.  I find myself not hating flying again.
 
2013-03-06 07:14:15 PM
Amateurs.  I once lost my cell phone on the Greyhound and they actually found it, contacted me, shipped it to the weird gas station that doubled as a Greyhound station in my podunk town, where I picked it up.

/yes, it was a Festivus miracle
 
2013-03-06 07:18:15 PM
Cool story, subby. But back in my day we made headlines that weren't quotes of the actual headline

/this is friendly criticism
//still a nice story, and for once I read Consumerist without wanting to choke the writer
 
2013-03-06 07:23:30 PM

AliceBToklasLives: Amateurs.  I once lost my cell phone on the Greyhound and they actually found it, contacted me, shipped it to the weird gas station that doubled as a Greyhound station in my podunk town, where I picked it up.

/yes, it was a Festivus miracle


Greyhound? Damn, that was a Festivus miracle. Glad you got your phone, and glad that there's at least one person (employee or passenger) that isn't an asshole. I had a much worse experience than yours.

Don't get me started on Amtrak.
 
2013-03-06 08:20:58 PM
When I lost a Kindle on a United flight, I didn't have to wait for them to mail it to me.  They flew it back to my home airport and had it waiting for me at the gate when I was scheduled to fly again 48 hours later.  No stupid poem.
 
2013-03-06 08:48:32 PM
Fake social media story plant is fake.
 
2013-03-06 08:51:05 PM
It could have been Ryan Air.


Dear Patron.

Dipshiat. You lost your phone. We are retuning it to you. Attached you will find a bill for our services.

Sanitation Fee....... $5
Labor Charge.......$20
Postage (international).....$50
Packaging...........$5
Cabin crew inconvenience fee.....$15

Come to think of it, we should keep your phone and hocked it on Bay (UK) because if you're cheap enough to fly our airline you probably too cheap to pay us back.

Sincerely

O'LEERy
 
2013-03-06 09:10:16 PM
Somebody should remind SWA that the goal of poetry is to say more with less.  This stuff is the opposite of poetry.
 
2013-03-06 10:08:46 PM

gingerjet: sethstorm: Not surprised given this is from the same airline that brings you seat gambling and higher prices.

[www.troll.me image 552x460]


Not a troll, just citing the facts.
 
2013-03-06 10:11:30 PM
Somehow this reminded of the Sorting Hat rhymes in the Harry Potter books, not Vogon poetry.


Also, the Consumerist posted a POSITIVE customer service story? What's up with that?
 
2013-03-06 10:36:07 PM

gingerjet: DrVoice: And a little bit of my faith in humanity.

Based on where I now live - Southwest is really the only option for direct flights to most places.  I find myself not hating flying again.


Except for the checkin roulette, nonstandard destinations, and that you're still paying for those extra bags with prices well above the rest.

/Why yes, I don't fly Southwest
//Or Delta (after screwing with Northwest's employees wrt labor relations)
///No problems with flying American
 
2013-03-06 10:54:14 PM

sethstorm: Not surprised given this is from the same airline that brings you seat gambling and higher prices.


All airlines are bad, so fly US Air?
 
2013-03-06 11:54:23 PM
How does SWA compare with Jet Blue? For me Jet Blue seemingly goes everywhere I need to go but I am open to change if SWA is better, cheaper.
 
2013-03-07 12:00:57 AM

sethstorm: gingerjet: DrVoice: And a little bit of my faith in humanity.

Based on where I now live - Southwest is really the only option for direct flights to most places.  I find myself not hating flying again.

Except for the checkin roulette, nonstandard destinations, and that you're still paying for those extra bags with prices well above the rest.

/Why yes, I don't fly Southwest
//Or Delta (after screwing with Northwest's employees wrt labor relations)
///No problems with flying American


I have always found Southwest to be as cheap as any of the other airlines. Is there some super secret booking site I should know about?
 
2013-03-07 01:20:27 AM
And I am not too sure about using the word And to start almost every line And then going on And on over some lost items And then listen to me going on And on...
 
2013-03-07 01:45:06 AM
All least they were trying to be original, unlike subby.
 
2013-03-07 02:45:22 AM

Pentaxian: How does SWA compare with Jet Blue? For me Jet Blue seemingly goes everywhere I need to go but I am open to change if SWA is better, cheaper.


JetBlue is MUCH better than Southwest.  About the only thing in common is the first bag is free.

JetBlue has free DirecTV, lots of free snack choices plus the extra cost box lunch things and assigned seats.

Southwest has peanuts and seat roulette.
 
2013-03-07 11:07:08 AM
So they've changed their policy of sending everything from lost and found over to Salvaton Army and claiming a tax deduction.

Think I'm kidding? I got a thank you note from the University of Chicago for returning a book I found at Salvation Army AND IT WASN'T EVEN OVER DUE YET.
 
2013-03-07 04:02:50 PM

Texas Gabe: All least they were trying to be original, unlike subby.



/self-demonstration
 
2013-03-07 04:31:05 PM

wildcardjack: So they've changed their policy of sending everything from lost and found over to Salvaton Army and claiming a tax deduction.

Think I'm kidding? I got a thank you note from the University of Chicago for returning a book I found at Salvation Army AND IT WASN'T EVEN OVER DUE YET.


How do you know Southwest had a hand in that rather than it just being something mixed up in junk somebody was cleaning out of their house?
 
2013-03-07 07:57:25 PM

clear_prop: Southwest has peanuts and seat roulette.


First of all, peanuts make for a great snack. I've flown a LOT of miles and most other airlines don't even give you peanuts. Pro-tip: Bring your own goddammed snacks.

Secondly, their "seat roulette" is a feature I like. You get to the airport on time and you get a good seat. Did American Airlines ever guarantee me a good seat choice? No, not even when I hit 50,000 miles in one year and attained platinum status When I did hit platinum I was usually able to get an aisle seat, but only usually. I'd rather fly Southwest.

My ONLY complaint about Southwest is when they started assigning boarding groups by allowing you to check in online 24 hours in advance. Hey, I got to the airport 2 hours before departure, I should be in the first boarding group. So yeah, I started checking in online too, but it still means I board at the same time some asshat shows up 5 minutes before departure.

Still, SWA is the only airline I like. I hate every other airline and I've never heard anyone say anything good about any other airline that is based in the US. SWA is also one of the few airlines that manages to turn a profit quarter after quarter. Most of the others seem designed to lose money and beg the government for money.
 
2013-03-08 01:36:42 PM

gingerjet: sethstorm: Not surprised given this is from the same airline that brings you seat gambling and higher prices.

[www.troll.me image 552x460]


Are you kidding? SW's product and service is the worst. I would "almost" go US Air over SW and that's saying something.
 
2013-03-08 01:39:05 PM

Happy Hours: clear_prop: Southwest has peanuts and seat roulette.

First of all, peanuts make for a great snack. I've flown a LOT of miles and most other airlines don't even give you peanuts. Pro-tip: Bring your own goddammed snacks.

Secondly, their "seat roulette" is a feature I like. You get to the airport on time and you get a good seat. Did American Airlines ever guarantee me a good seat choice? No, not even when I hit 50,000 miles in one year and attained platinum status When I did hit platinum I was usually able to get an aisle seat, but only usually. I'd rather fly Southwest.

My ONLY complaint about Southwest is when they started assigning boarding groups by allowing you to check in online 24 hours in advance. Hey, I got to the airport 2 hours before departure, I should be in the first boarding group. So yeah, I started checking in online too, but it still means I board at the same time some asshat shows up 5 minutes before departure.

Still, SWA is the only airline I like. I hate every other airline and I've never heard anyone say anything good about any other airline that is based in the US. SWA is also one of the few airlines that manages to turn a profit quarter after quarter. Most of the others seem designed to lose money and beg the government for money.


Or you could just reserve a good seat on a normal airline.
 
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