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(This Is Bristol)   The teen hit the man, then drove off as 'he wasn't exactly dead or anything'   (thisisbristol.co.uk) divider line 46
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8463 clicks; posted to Main » on 06 Mar 2013 at 9:46 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-03-06 09:21:53 AM
He's not dead, he's only resting.
 
2013-03-06 09:49:28 AM
smash, smash, SUMMASH!
 
2013-03-06 09:50:51 AM
i47.tinypic.com

/Approves
//farking douchey kids.
/My lawn... off.
 
2013-03-06 09:51:11 AM
He doesn't want to go on the cart.
 
2013-03-06 09:52:42 AM
this is the "it's not my fault" generation
 
2013-03-06 09:53:13 AM
Checklist:

____ Mostly dead
____ Merely dead
____ Most sincerely dead
 
2013-03-06 09:55:18 AM
Sounds like the beginning of a horror movie.
 
Skr
2013-03-06 09:55:20 AM
I need to remember this excuse. It could prove.... useful.
 
2013-03-06 09:55:45 AM
I think I'll go for a walk. I feel happy!
 
2013-03-06 09:56:41 AM
I wouldn't stop and tangle with Daniel Lewis either.
 
2013-03-06 09:58:22 AM
"The court heard that Churchill had taken over the driving on their trip into Bristol from Yate because Moore had such a "terrible sense of direction"."

Is he right about women, fellas?
 
2013-03-06 09:59:00 AM
Gemma Moore, now his ex-girlfriend

So that's all it takes to get out of a bad relationship?

"Sweetie, can I borrow your car?"
"Sure."

WHAM!

"It's over."
 
2013-03-06 09:59:22 AM
BALLROOM BLITZ!
 
2013-03-06 10:00:57 AM
He should have run the guy over again, to make sure. Otherwise it's the start of a horror movie.
 
2013-03-06 10:02:58 AM
He was only mostly dead
 
2013-03-06 10:03:56 AM

Nurglitch: He should have run the guy over again, to make sure. Otherwise it's the start of a horror movie.


Cletus and Earl go hunting.   Cletus accidentally shoots Earl.  In a panic, Cletus calls 911 on his cellphone.  The dispatcher tries to calm him down, and says "First, make sure he's dead."  The dispatcher hears *BLAM* from the other end of the phone, and Cletus comes back on and said "OK, he's dead for sure.  Now what?"
 
2013-03-06 10:05:02 AM

I_Can't_Believe_it's_not_Boutros


Checklist:

____ Mostly dead
____ Merely dead
____ Most sincerely All dead


OOOooooh, look who knows so much!

captainawkwarddotcom.files.wordpress.com


pic is borrowed
 
2013-03-06 10:06:25 AM
I doubt this will be this D-Bag's last time in court
 
2013-03-06 10:10:57 AM

skinink: "The court heard that Churchill had taken over the driving on their trip into Bristol from Yate because Moore had such a "terrible sense of direction"."

Is he right about women, fellas?


She had a terrible sense of direction but he had a terrible sense for driving...
 
2013-03-06 10:14:27 AM

I_Can't_Believe_it's_not_Boutros: Checklist:

____ Mostly dead
____ Merely dead
____ Most sincerely dead



You forgot:
____ Pushing up the daisies.
____ Bleedin' demised.
____ Bereft of life and resting in peace

And most importantly:
____ an ex-____
 
2013-03-06 10:15:29 AM

UncleStumpy: this is the "it's not my fault" generation


Their parents are Republicans.
 
2013-03-06 10:17:20 AM

Free Radical: UncleStumpy: this is the "it's not my fault" generation

Their parents are Republicans.

Han and Lando

/FTFY
 
2013-03-06 10:19:39 AM
Is it sad that when I read the amount the teen would be paying to the man, I immediately thought of how much the settlement would have been in the US? Covering costs seems reasonable (I would include forced time off from work as a result of any injuries under this heading) to me. But US injury cases throw in tons of random items that also need to be paid. The craziest I've heard was when my ex had rear-ended a pick-up truck at a stoplight on a rainy day. The wife of the pick-up truck's driver demanded that part of the settlement include an award to HER (she was not in the truck) due to months of sexual dissatisfaction while her husband was supposedly too injured to boink her (I say supposedly because his injuries from the accident amounted to minor back pain and a few sessions of PT for his back and shoulder). I'm getting tired of hearing people say that they're "in for a big payday" when they receive their settlement. The point isn't to pay for a new car or a new TV - it's to cover costs directly incurred from the injury.
 
2013-03-06 10:20:15 AM

Skr: I need to remember this excuse. It could prove.... useful.


There's an even better one:

snltranscripts.jt.org
You say.. "Steve.. how can  I be a millionaire.. and  never pay taxes?" First.. get a million dollars. Now.. you say, "Steve.. what do I say to the tax man when he comes to my door and says, 'You.. have  never paid taxes'?"

Two simple words. Two simple words in the English language: "I forgot!" How many times do we let ourselves get into terrible situations because we  don't say "I forgot"? Let's say you're on trial for armed robbery. You say to the judge, "I forgot armed robbery was illegal."
 
2013-03-06 10:24:28 AM

Free Radical: UncleStumpy: this is the "it's not my fault" generation

Their parents are Republicans.


Im England? Most unusual!
What does one call the children of English Democrats?
 
2013-03-06 10:25:50 AM
Must be a fan of Homeland
 
2013-03-06 10:35:02 AM

dv-ous: [i47.tinypic.com image 480x360]

/Approves
//farking douchey kids.
/My lawn... off.


That is exactly the kind of chav i pictured when I RTFA - what a punchable face that twot has.
 
2013-03-06 10:35:33 AM

UncleStumpy: this is the "it's not my fault" generation


Yep.  I wish they could be more like all of the previous generations throughout history in which everyone took responsibility for their actions and no one ever tried to get away with anything.  Man, we're all awesome except for these rotten kids today.
 
2013-03-06 10:48:57 AM
It might have been better that he didn't stop.  Do you guys remember a while back some pot heads were running over women joggers so they could rape them?  It didn't matter if they died from getting hit or not, they just wanted to rape them.
 
2013-03-06 10:49:45 AM

I_Can't_Believe_it's_not_Boutros: Checklist: ____ Mostly dead ____ Merely dead ____ Most sincerely dead


4.bp.blogspot.com

/approves of this message
 
2013-03-06 10:51:48 AM
Broken phone?   Did he throw it at the car as it sped off??
 
2013-03-06 11:05:54 AM
Unrelated. How the fark does this place get its own tag and Arizona has YET to get one...
 
2013-03-06 11:05:59 AM
jaydeanhcr.files.wordpress.com

Sometimes, dead is bettah.
 
2013-03-06 11:07:17 AM

mikaloyd: Free Radical: UncleStumpy: this is the "it's not my fault" generation

Their parents are Republicans.

Im England? Most unusual!
What does one call the children of English Democrats?

"On The Dole."
 
2013-03-06 11:13:07 AM
I liked the part where he said he was afraid the guy he hit was carrying a knife.  I wonder what gave him that indication.
 
2013-03-06 11:13:14 AM

FullMetalPanda: Do you guys remember a while back some pot heads were running over women joggers so they could rape them?


no
 
2013-03-06 11:19:30 AM
FTFA: "Mr (Daniel) Lewis was half way across the road when he was struck.  The defendant then continued to drive over his foot.  He didn't stop."

Obviously... (Takes off sunglasses.)  His Left Foot.  YEAAAAH!

/Thank you!  All week, tip, veal, etc...
//Daniel Day Lewis was in a movie called "My Left Foot."  Never saw it, but I think it's about his left foot.
///Comedy is fun!
////I made it up to four slashies!  My high score!
 
2013-03-06 11:33:12 AM
FTA:"At a different hearing, Ms Li added that Churchill struck Daniel Lewis as he turned into Lower Castle Street."

Neat trick
 
2013-03-06 12:04:55 PM

dv-ous: [i47.tinypic.com image 480x360]

/Approves
//farking douchey kids.
/My lawn... off.


ha yeah - first thing i thought of too.
except that kid is awesome
 
2013-03-06 12:05:21 PM

FullMetalPanda: It might have been better that he didn't stop.  Do you guys remember a while back some pot heads were running over women joggers so they could rape them?  It didn't matter if they died from getting hit or not, they just wanted to rape them.


Pot heads can't even find their car, let alone summon up the initiative to get off the couch and put that plan into action.
 
2013-03-06 12:15:19 PM

mikaloyd: Free Radical: UncleStumpy: this is the "it's not my fault" generation

Their parents are Republicans.

Im England? Most unusual!
What does one call the children of English Democrats?


Scotts
 
2013-03-06 01:51:10 PM
It's somehow perversely reassuring that the UK has as much of a problem with personal responsibility as the rest of the world.
 
2013-03-06 02:16:12 PM
But did he get better?
 
2013-03-06 04:30:24 PM

Bubbacus: FTFA: "Mr (Daniel) Lewis was half way across the road when he was struck.  The defendant then continued to drive over his foot.  He didn't stop."

Obviously... (Takes off sunglasses.)  His Left Foot.  YEAAAAH!

/Thank you!  All week, tip, veal, etc...
//Daniel Day Lewis was in a movie called "My Left Foot."  Never saw it, but I think it's about his left foot.
///Comedy is fun!
////I made it up to four slashies!  My high score!


Reeeeeeeeeally too bad there's no way to have looked up the information before posting.

/Someone really should invent the interwebs.
 
2013-03-06 05:02:09 PM

I_Can't_Believe_it's_not_Boutros: Checklist:

____ Mostly dead
____ Merely dead
____ Most sincerely dead


Legitimately dead
 
2013-03-07 04:26:12 AM

BarkingUnicorn: I_Can't_Believe_it's_not_Boutros: Checklist:

____ Mostly dead
____ Merely dead
____ Most sincerely dead

Legitimately dead




He's just pining.
 
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