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(Atlanta Journal Constitution)   Snow and ice fall in Georgia. Milk and bread suppliers give each other high fives, light cigars with $100 bills   (ajc.com) divider line 64
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4453 clicks; posted to Main » on 19 Dec 2003 at 5:47 PM (11 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2003-12-19 11:00:08 AM  
At least everything closes here and the whole city goes into freak-out mode. When I lived in Colorado, driving through a foot of snow was a miserable pain in the ass. And the drivers aren't much better.
 
2003-12-19 11:08:16 AM  
Same thing, different year.
 
2003-12-19 12:13:01 PM  
Weather cliches are outstanding!

/milhouse paraphrased
 
2003-12-19 01:14:33 PM  
It's funny 'cause it's true.

Time for me to make some milk-and-bread casserole, along with some heapin' helpings of toilet paper and beer.
 
2003-12-19 02:37:23 PM  
Why the dairy products? I never understood that. If the power goes out, they'll be the first things to spoil.
 
2003-12-19 03:58:38 PM  
that's weird, my mother used to stockpile batteries whenever a big storm was about to hit...but she never bothered to buy any food.
 
2003-12-19 05:50:25 PM  
"Why the dairy products? I never understood that. If the power goes out, they'll be the first things to spoil."


ok ding dongs, when its freezing outside, and the power goes off, you put the things that need to be cold in a cooler OUTSIDE!
 
2003-12-19 05:50:56 PM  
Hilarious headline.
 
2003-12-19 05:54:07 PM  
That joke was tired the first time it appeared on Fark, yay these many winters ago.
 
2003-12-19 05:55:12 PM  
Driving to Asheville, NC tomorrow. Ought to be loads of fun.
 
2003-12-19 05:56:51 PM  
it's a bad joke, but it's a sad truth. lol. when I first moved out here my roommate said "we're supposed to get our first freeze tonight. so I'm going to go to the store and stock up on milk and bread" and I was like "wtf? If we get snowed in are we just going to dip the bread in the milk? Get some burritos or something". But she said that's what her mom always did too.

/thinks I told this story lastyear.
 
2003-12-19 05:57:57 PM  
As a former resident of the Southeast, I don't miss this kind of thing a bit. Now I just have to put up with it flooding everytime it rains.
 
2003-12-19 06:00:26 PM  
Farkin pussies. I'm still waiting for a good storm here in Colorado, though. Great headline too.
 
2003-12-19 06:02:24 PM  
They should try putting crushed glass on the roads. I here that works good and kids love the taste
 
2003-12-19 06:03:16 PM  


I know it's a Metro and all, but how on earth is this car stuck?
 
2003-12-19 06:04:54 PM  
wheatweasel,

The milk -- it's not so much a power-outage concern. It's a "being snowed/iced in with nothing to eat" concern. If you have milk, you're halfway to a big bowl of cereal. Or you could make hot chocolate -- which is always great in winter weather. You could add the milk to your oatmeal or eat it with a pop-tart. You'll also need some milk for mac-n-cheese. If you are out of milk, you'll eat dry cereal, powdery mac-n-cheese, watery hot chocolate, etc.
 
2003-12-19 06:05:27 PM  
Just stay home and cower in fear of the big bad snowflakes.
 
2003-12-19 06:06:55 PM  
wantedman

Can't you just link it yourself?
 
2003-12-19 06:08:22 PM  
Criscodisco

It's not stuck. It just finally dawned on her that she was driving a Geo. The street sweepers will take care of it tomorrow.
 
2003-12-19 06:08:45 PM  
criscodisco,

That car is stuck because the road is a sheet of ice. That ain't snow. That's ice. The South wishes it would snow instead of freeze-rain. Ice is what the South gets a lot of -- sleet, freezing rain -- not snow, by the way.
 
kcm
2003-12-19 06:09:47 PM  
 
2003-12-19 06:12:21 PM  
Criscodisco
Exactly what I was thinking. She's probably crying about it, too.
 
2003-12-19 06:19:20 PM  
"Fannin County schools were closed Friday."

FOR FOUR INCHES OF SNOW?!?!?!

I have lived in Alberta my whole life, and have never, never had a day of school cancelled for snow!

When it hit -40, we weren't allowed to walk home for lunch, but that was it!

You Americans are such pussies.
 
2003-12-19 06:19:36 PM  
chudstud

yeah, but I thought that Metro's came with a spare Metro in the trunk. Couldn't she just drive that home? Or at least head in the direction of the 90's, where people don't wear stirrup pants with a big shirt?
 
2003-12-19 06:21:31 PM  
**yawning** in Atlanta at the supposed *STORM*
 
2003-12-19 06:22:47 PM  
 
2003-12-19 06:26:04 PM  
Did the center of the Universe get some snow?

Meanwhile, eastern Canada is experiencing one of the mildest winters on record.

Sh*t, I'd give anything for a white christmas.
 
GTP
2003-12-19 06:28:07 PM  
True, you only have to mention the s-word to get things closed around here. But, if you do get snow in Atlanta, it's bad. Not because of the weather per se, but because you have to watch twice as hard for the Atlanta drivers.
 
2003-12-19 06:28:10 PM  
Ahhh I don't miss those idiot-ridden days in Norcross at all. Hell, I had to turn on my A/C today going to lunch in Santa Monica!
 
2003-12-19 06:29:36 PM  
Sure, we'll barricade our houses when we get a few flurries, but all of you northern types start screaming about the fiery wrath of god being upon you when it cracks 70 in the summer.

Hell, I once wore an electrically heated ski parka on a noon jog when it was 130-something here in Georgia. Never once had to pull out my combination water atomizer/fan. Quite comfortable, as a matter of fact.
 
2003-12-19 06:31:31 PM  
GTP

Now now, I've lived in Atlanta before, and we both know that Atlanta drivers are plenty deadly without having snow to blame.
 
2003-12-19 06:33:10 PM  
Until the sun comes out and we get help from the Lord, it's just going to be a battle.


Just like a Georgian to make everything up to God...Lady, the Lord put that ice on those bridges in the first place....and the sun coming out? You make it sound like divine intervention everytime the Earth rotates.

 
2003-12-19 06:33:26 PM  
"We've had crews working since about midnight in five counties -- Lumpkin, Rabun, Towns, Union and White," said DOT spokeswoman Teri Pope. "There are icy spots in all five of those counties."

I'd like to know where. Perhaps up on the mountain passes, but there wasn't any where I was driving today in these counties. And what is this shiat about four inches of snow? Maybe on top of Brasstown Bald. This wasn't even worth reporting on. But it's snowing again!
 
2003-12-19 06:34:37 PM  
Arthur Figgis: OK, you got me there. I don't think I could survive more than a day in 100+ weather. Especially with humidity like you get down in Georgia and Florida.

Give me -40 any day, at least then you can just put on a sweater and drink Irish Coffee. When it's that hot, there's no way to escape it.
 
2003-12-19 06:38:29 PM  
Criscodisco: three words: Front wheel drive.
 
2003-12-19 06:38:29 PM  
Just thought I'd check in from central New York.. yeah, we got snow.
 
2003-12-19 06:38:57 PM  
Just like a farker to show religious intolerance and ridicule towards a Christian.
 
2003-12-19 06:42:27 PM  
Ugh. Georgia drivers. Insane rich woman speeding down the wrong side of the road in her '02 Corvette recently deprived me of my precious '96 Camry via 30 mph of silver fiberglass piloted directly into my drivers' side.

I crawled out of the passenger side of my car, dazed and bleeding a little, and she screams "You f-cking teen driver! I had the right of way!"

Compassion and basic motor skills are dead in the Peach state.
 
2003-12-19 06:45:10 PM  
gromky: Just like a farker to show religious intolerance and ridicule towards a Christian.


No gromky, I am showing intolerance and ridicule towards a complete moron. Two actually.

 
2003-12-19 06:46:48 PM  
And on the subject of Fannin County schools closing, those slackjaws over there will close the schools if they see an ice cube on the road. Those kids get more snow days than 90% of the world.
 
2003-12-19 06:49:31 PM  
2003-12-19 03:58:38 PM someguy50


that's weird, my mother used to stockpile batteries whenever a big storm was about to hit...but she never bothered to buy any food.


There's a vibrator joke in there somewhere, but I'm too nice of a guy to set it free.
 
2003-12-19 06:50:12 PM  
I'm a native Californian. None of this makes any sense to me. Do your stores just close when it snows?
 
2003-12-19 06:59:46 PM  
Nah, they don't close, unless it snows really heavily. People just get scared of being trapped at home for a few days, so they go bonkers. And it feeds itself, because the people who aren't scared of being trapped go to the store to buy the stuff because they're afraid that there won't be any left.
 
2003-12-19 07:05:45 PM  
As a resident of Georgia, I take offense to that headline...it's more like $1,000 dollar bills.
 
2003-12-19 07:06:54 PM  
haysoos

I hear ya. I'm in Edmonton, and this sounds like typical driving conditions six months out of the year. Of course, we are the worst drivers in the country.
 
2003-12-19 07:37:15 PM  
Your Name Here

Hey, speak for yourself. I'm in Edmonton too, and I am not a bad driver.

All those other morons who insist on going the speed limit and not moving when I tail-gate them through red lights or cut them off when switching lanes are the bad drivers.
 
2003-12-19 07:48:13 PM  
Figgis: you shoulda whacked 'er with yer tar arn....
 
2003-12-19 08:05:11 PM  
criscodisco, look who's driving....nuf said
 
2003-12-19 08:12:56 PM  
Yo haysoos, Pussies? check it out: I live in Nebraska.Evey winter we get several weeks at -20 and below with wind chills of -80. Where I live four wheel drive is not just a luxery. Why your little Canadian arse would have to curl up in your little maple leaf and crawl back to your local balmy weather in -80 wind chills. Not all of the USA is 70 degrees year round. Just though you ought ot know.
 
2003-12-19 08:43:19 PM  
2003-12-19 06:38:29 PM skiinstructor
Criscodisco: three words: Front wheel drive.


And on top of that, the 3-cylinder engine in those "cars" puts out around 80HP if you're lucky, which gets transmitted to the road through a pair of tires the same width as the spare tires on real cars.

I did something similar with my Geo during a huge rainstorm in a less-developed section of town about seven years ago. I tried to pull a U-turn and dropped the front end off the pavement and slid into a ditch. Had to be pulled out by a wrecker.

I totaled the car the following month in a rear-end collision with a foreign couple going 40mph or less in the CENTER FARKING LANE of the interstate, at midnight. I do miss the 45+ mpg fuel economy, though.
 
2003-12-19 08:54:38 PM  
I did my grocery shopping this afternoon. It was not unlike any other day.

Fark succumbs to idiocy, once again.
 
2003-12-19 10:59:26 PM  
I never understood this little bit of snow shuts down the city thing that these southerners allegedly have going on.

I am very much accustomed to this "snow," but I would love to see this all go down. Assuming it all happens like I have heard.

/by the bye, it's snowing now. I like snow.
 
2003-12-19 11:23:58 PM  
Technically, the thing that kills us here in Georgia is the ice. In the north, it's more than likely snow and that's it. However, here you usually get sheets of black ice. No matter where you're from or how well you can drive...you touch some black ice and you're gonna be sitting in a ditch.
 
2003-12-19 11:34:31 PM  
I remembered when it snowed in San Angelo, good god. The people in that town can't drive when it is dry or when it sprinkles, much less in snow and ice.
 
2003-12-19 11:47:17 PM  
Mad props for the headline! Nothing funier in this world than native Southerners trying to drive on snow & ice! God Times.
 
2003-12-20 12:01:20 AM  
Live in Sandy Springs, drive to work in Norcross...

If we're getting a light dusting of flurries... er... uh, "snow", then I guess I'll have the roads to myself tomorrow! yay!
 
2003-12-20 12:15:39 AM  
As a former Atlanta resident, best of luck to the folks driving on the 400 tomorrow.
 
2003-12-20 12:47:20 AM  
Yeah, yeah, Southerners don't know how to handle the snow. But that's because it's rare and it rarely gets all that cold and winter is very short. So, we may be big wussies when it comes to snow, but at least we're smart enough to live in a nice climate. Well, most of us...

(bundles up, sits next to radiator, wonders why the hell I moved to Chicago...)
 
2003-12-20 12:50:06 AM  


crap! now I have to allow a sunny day at the north pole
 
2003-12-20 01:57:51 AM  
FOR FOUR INCHES OF SNOW?!?!?!

I have lived in Alberta my whole life, and have never, never had a day of school cancelled for snow!

When it hit -40, we weren't allowed to walk home for lunch, but that was it!

You Americans are such pussies.


Maybe the people south of Minnesota, but here I sit in Minnesota laughing my a$$ off at those wussies down south.

I was at Ft. Benning during that ice storm that was mentioned...early 80's...ice everywhere...Benning WAS shut down for a couple days...and I laughed.

Another little tidbit - Minnesota has extreme fluctuations in temperature throughout the year...it can be -60 F in the winter (I've experienced it) up to over 100 F with a nice dose of humidity (I've experienced that, too). The only other place that has this temperature extreme is in the middle of Farking Siberia!

WHY DO I LIVE HERE??!!
 
2003-12-20 07:34:12 AM  
Try 6 months in the year when you have to deal with snow, ice, black ice, freezing rain and hail.
Otherwise known as Nova Scotia.
 
2003-12-20 04:54:59 PM  
haysoos:

You say that you've never had a day of school cancelled for snow, while we here in GA have had MANY. I don't know about you, but I loved school cancellations when I was a kid. So let's ask the question: Are we pussies or are you guys just stupid? Ah... maybe both. :)
 
2003-12-20 07:32:53 PM  
I was thinking about this the other day. Lighting a 100 dollar bill means twice as much effort in lighting a cigar.

Light cigar with lighter (easy)

Light 100 bill+light cigar with 100 bill = 2x effort. plus thats 100 bucks they could be giving santa's lapdances.
 
Ni!
2003-12-20 08:13:32 PM  
Hey! I live in Fannin County. All they were doing on Friday was a Christmas (gasp!) show anyway, so they figured there was no need to bother going. And yes, people freaked. Hell, I grew up in Central Florida and the natives here were more in an uproar about it than I was.

It's pretty though.
 
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