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(Fox News)   Fox's favorite 'perfectly married' douche is back to talk about how perfect his marriage is. "I'm a guy and...." let me stop you right there   (foxnews.com) divider line 268
    More: Obvious, hairline  
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27139 clicks; posted to Main » on 03 Mar 2013 at 11:47 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-03-03 11:05:13 AM
After reading the entire article I came to this part:

Steven Crowder is a comedian and Fox News contributor.

which explained everything.  Comedy gold.
 
2013-03-03 11:24:18 AM
I find this alleged guy to have an extremely punchable face.

And fapable wife.
 
2013-03-03 11:29:44 AM
From his Wikipedia page: He was married in August 2012

Snicker.
 
2013-03-03 11:41:01 AM
A man-child who says he needs a woman to be a better man.

Yeah... There ya go. Good luck with that, kiddo.

I love how he speaks with all-encompassing knowledge on every topic he deigns to enlighten us about.

You're a douchebag. Just own it.
 
2013-03-03 11:41:37 AM

rumpelstiltskin: From his Wikipedia page: He was married in August 2012

Snicker.


They are probably still having sex, even.
 
2013-03-03 11:49:42 AM
Not only is it often as disingenuous as Joe Biden's hairline, but it's incredibly harmful

 Leave the jokes for the funny people, please.
 
2013-03-03 11:51:01 AM
That's disgusting

A married guy who won't disparage his spouse.

Utterly awful
 
2013-03-03 11:52:41 AM
The future Mrs titwrench is a huge pain in my ass. If she wasn't I wouldn't get anything done.
 
2013-03-03 11:53:14 AM
"What kind of an idiot are you to marry a person that you think is an absolute moron?"

Somebody looking for a soul mate?
 
2013-03-03 11:54:16 AM

CujoQuarrel: That's disgusting

A married guy who won't disparage his spouse.

Utterly awful


I never had a bad thing to say about any of my exes for the first six months we were together either.
 
2013-03-03 11:55:19 AM

cmunic8r99: rumpelstiltskin: From his Wikipedia page: He was married in August 2012

Snicker.

They are probably still having sex, even.


With each other, even. That won't last. He'll have a column in a year or three complaining about the cleanliness in Chinese massage parlors or bathroom stalls.
 
2013-03-03 11:56:03 AM
He just got his first "Married Filing Jointly" tax refund. $5 that Wifey will be sick of his shiat first.
 
2013-03-03 11:57:39 AM
Single guy here, reporting with popcorn.
 
2013-03-03 11:57:57 AM
So women never complain about their husbands to each other? Riiiight.
 
2013-03-03 12:00:29 PM
"I'm a man, but I can change, if I have to, I guess."
 
2013-03-03 12:01:25 PM

titwrench: The future Mrs titwrench is a huge pain in my ass. If she wasn't I wouldn't get anything done.


This.
 
2013-03-03 12:02:07 PM
I used to be a pain in my wife's butt then I started using a better lube
 
2013-03-03 12:02:51 PM
My gut reaction after reading TFA was, "...his wife is cheating on him."
Why? Because when you write an article like that, the universe can't resist. It has a dick-ish sense of humor.
 
2013-03-03 12:03:20 PM
He's only been married six months, and he's an expert on marital relationships? I caught a gecko in the summer and released it back outside, yet I'm not calling myself a doctor of zoology.

Come back in forty years.
 
2013-03-03 12:03:28 PM
My wife is a huge pain in the ass, and I love the hell out of her. That's the way it should be.

/Guy must have a boring sex life.
 
2013-03-03 12:03:33 PM

VoodooTaco: titwrench: The future Mrs titwrench is a huge pain in my ass. If she wasn't I wouldn't get anything done.

This.


Carrot AND stick.
Cna't have one with out the other.
 
2013-03-03 12:03:34 PM
www.popcrunch.com

Speaking of hot wives...
 
2013-03-03 12:04:08 PM
Somebody give this douche a thatsthejoke.jpg.

And it's this douche:

cdn.breitbart.com
 
2013-03-03 12:06:28 PM

cmunic8r99: rumpelstiltskin: From his Wikipedia page: He was married in August 2012

Snicker.

They are probably still having sex, even.


But not with each other.
 
2013-03-03 12:06:44 PM

rumpelstiltskin: From his Wikipedia page: He was married in August 2012

Snicker.


Damn, that's bad...I'vebeen married longer than him (April 2011).

I can see where he is TRYING to come from, but he's a dumb ass for thinking wives don't bad mouth their husbands too. Works both ways.

Hell, my man and I have PLENTY we could diss each other about to other people:

-I'm too fat, he's too thin
-He's from California, I'm from Louisiana (This fact makes it FUN when we watch "Cops" together)
-He's lazy about getting stuff done around the house, I biatch and complain too much

and I could go on.

But why biatch and moan to OTHER people to fit in to the stereotype of "oh its such drag being married". OR go into the "Oh I have such a perfect marriage" stereotype.

The fact is, married or not, you got two people living together under one roof. You are gonna find shiat that you can't stand about the other person. You have shiat you love about the person. The only time it gets out of hand is when (and this is just IMHO) no one is communicating that very fact. Come to a compromise or something.It's not that hard!
 
2013-03-03 12:07:16 PM
He won't say anything bad about her, but certainly he lets his fists do all the talking.
 
2013-03-03 12:08:58 PM
"Oh shut the F**k up!" would be my only reply to that guy.
 
2013-03-03 12:10:38 PM
I'm looking for a girl who knows how to make croissants. Good ones.
That would be unbelievably awesome.
 
2013-03-03 12:12:33 PM
If you think your wife, or really anyone you are very close to, is perfect and beyond criticism then you don't actually know them very well. Any two people who live together are going to be out of sync about some things. That's just the nature of not being identical people. That is why people biatch about their spouses because everyone has something they don't like about them. It's the same reason they complain about bad weather to each other. It is a natural and common problem. This guy is wearing blinders but he's probably right that his wife is too good for him.

/or he could just be extremely submissive
//not that there's anything wrong with that with the right dom
 
2013-03-03 12:13:08 PM
He's not complaining - but she probably is.
 
2013-03-03 12:13:20 PM
This reminds me of an episode of Everybody Loves Raymond.  You're in love, God bless you, you know nothing, or something along those lines.

/DNRTFA  (skimmed, which was plenty)
 
2013-03-03 12:14:48 PM

offmymeds: So women never complain about their husbands to each other? Riiiight.


It's not just that; the stuff they say is a complete over-share. Mrs Clam comes home from knitting group with complete horror stories about what these chicks say about their dudes. I can't imagine saying this crap to my best friend, let alone some random people I hardly knew.

Meanwhile, I have never actually heard a guy biatch about his wife. Maybe it's because I don't hang out with enough guys, or maybe it's because my guy friends are gentlemen, or maybe because only one of us has been divorced so far, and he refused to say anything bad about his ex. I like to think it's just part of that guys-will-talk-about-anything-except-their-feelings-and-relationships thing. And that's fine with me.
 
2013-03-03 12:15:37 PM

NewportBarGuy: A man-child who says he needs a woman to be a better man.


There are some cases where this is true.
For instance the deal I have going with my girlfriend. Though we've only been dating since July, we've been best friends forever. And for at least the last ten years we have had a deal worked out where if she tells me to do something I do it, and if she tells me not to do something I don't. No arguing, no discussion.
When she says you need to go to the hospital right now, I skedaddle to the closest hospital. When she says, no! you can't climb on that! I don't. I seem to lack that little voice that says 'hey, maybe that's not a good idea' so she provides it for me =D

\been best friends for almost 25 years (since we were 6)
\\been pretty deeply in love for at least a couple of years before we started dating. ♥
 
2013-03-03 12:16:13 PM

edmo: "What kind of an idiot are you to marry a person that you think is an absolute moron?"

Somebody looking for a soul mate?


Can't.Compete.With.Biblical.Comparisons.

Well played Sir, well played indeed.
 
2013-03-03 12:16:54 PM
I'm very sorry that the article writer was already caught cheating on his wife already, and the article itself is sort of a nice start to kiss and make up.
 
2013-03-03 12:17:28 PM
Why does it say Peter Johnson Jr. above the headline?

Peter...Johnson...Junior
 
2013-03-03 12:17:37 PM
She's standing right behind you, isn't she?
 
2013-03-03 12:18:11 PM

rumpelstiltskin: From his Wikipedia page: He was married in August 2012

Snicker.


This. Sorry,  but I'm not taking marriage advice from someone who is still basically on their honeymoon. I might as well take driving tips from my 14 year-old son. He has a drivers license now, so he must be an expert, right?
 
2013-03-03 12:21:39 PM

Uchiha_Cycliste: NewportBarGuy: A man-child who says he needs a woman to be a better man.

There are some cases where this is true.
For instance the deal I have going with my girlfriend. Though we've only been dating since July, we've been best friends forever. And for at least the last ten years we have had a deal worked out where if she tells me to do something I do it, and if she tells me not to do something I don't. No arguing, no discussion.
When she says you need to go to the hospital right now, I skedaddle to the closest hospital. When she says, no! you can't climb on that! I don't. I seem to lack that little voice that says 'hey, maybe that's not a good idea' so she provides it for me =D

\been best friends for almost 25 years (since we were 6)
\\been pretty deeply in love for at least a couple of years before we started dating. ♥


In other words, you say "Yes dear."  There's only two ways a wife is perfect.  Either you're submissive and do everything she says.  Or she's submissive and does everything you say.  Any other way you disagree and no one's perfect.
 
2013-03-03 12:22:46 PM

Uchiha_Cycliste: NewportBarGuy: A man-child who says he needs a woman to be a better man.

There are some cases where this is true.
For instance the deal I have going with my girlfriend. Though we've only been dating since July, we've been best friends forever. And for at least the last ten years we have had a deal worked out where if she tells me to do something I do it, and if she tells me not to do something I don't. No arguing, no discussion.
When she says you need to go to the hospital right now, I skedaddle to the closest hospital. When she says, no! you can't climb on that! I don't. I seem to lack that little voice that says 'hey, maybe that's not a good idea' so she provides it for me =D

\been best friends for almost 25 years (since we were 6)
\\been pretty deeply in love for at least a couple of years before we started dating. ♥


damn, it's a bit dusty here in casa de la mafiageek all the sudden!
 
2013-03-03 12:22:49 PM
If your spouse is such a horrible person, what does that say about you for marrying her/him, hmmm? I think it's natural to want to vent on occasion but if all you have to say is negative, you're a piece of shiat.
 
2013-03-03 12:22:53 PM
FTA:
When men get together, they moan about their wives.
 
---

Got news for ya bro, she's saying stuff about you when the women get together.
 
2013-03-03 12:24:19 PM
My wife and I have been married almost 8 years, and we get along pretty well. We actually are like best friends and make each other laugh a lot. Even so, there are arguments and disagreements every now and then. You're not being real with each other if you don't have genuine tension sometimes.

That said, like everything else having to do with cable news, Johnny Comedian's remarks on his "perfect marriage" are more about drawing viewers and commentary (like we're all doing) and building his own brand than it is about conveying any real facts or opinions.
 
2013-03-03 12:25:14 PM

I should be in the kitchen: If your spouse is such a horrible person, what does that say about you for marrying her/him, hmmm? I think it's natural to want to vent on occasion but if all you have to say is negative, you're a piece of shiat.


Yes this
 
2013-03-03 12:26:09 PM
This guy's marriage is already on the rocks. He thinks this article will give him a shot at another wet hole soon.
 
2013-03-03 12:27:18 PM
This was the guy in college who would insist to his dorm mates that his freshman year pigwoman was hotter than Angelina Jolie, even if she wasn't there.  And he had boundary issues.
 
2013-03-03 12:28:52 PM

mod3072: This. Sorry, but I'm not taking marriage advice from someone who is still basically on their honeymoon. I might as well take driving tips from my 14 year-old son. He has a drivers license now, so he must be an expert, right?


What maniac gave a 14 year old a drivers license?
 
2013-03-03 12:29:57 PM
Is this the same guy who pontificated that he waited until marraige to have sex?

That guy was a royal douche.
 
2013-03-03 12:30:49 PM
I am a pita. I expect my man to blow off steam with his friends and complain. Otherwise, it would just build up and he would resent me. I do the same to my friends. So, I can come home with a fresh perspective.
 
2013-03-03 12:31:00 PM

Ambivalence: Is this the same guy who pontificated that he waited until marraige to have sex?

That guy was a royal douche.


Surprise! He still is.
 
2013-03-03 12:31:01 PM

Ambivalence: Is this the same guy who pontificated that he waited until marraige to have sex?

That guy was a royal douche.


He's probably a liar as well.
 
2013-03-03 12:31:19 PM
My Grandmother (Who was married to my Grandfather for over 40 years.) had a favorite saying: "Show me a happily married man and I'll show you a wife who isn't doing her job."

From this article I deduce that Steven Crowder either has a lazy wife, or one that has a great job and him being a "comedian" and Fox News contributor doesn't pay the rent.
 
2013-03-03 12:31:20 PM

rumpelstiltskin: From his Wikipedia page: He was married in August 2012

Snicker.


Yeah, the shine is definitely still on the apple.

Not that marriage is miserable in any way, but a year and a half means he's even still probably getting head purely because she felt like it.
 
2013-03-03 12:31:21 PM
When you have problems, you discuss them. (Or biatch about them, if you don't know how to have a discussion.) When you learn how to resolve your problems, there's no need to discuss them other than as anecdotes, the same way you mention a movie you watched recently.

That paragraph wouldn't have made much of an article.
 
2013-03-03 12:31:23 PM
In other news, Jesse Crowder has a tiny penis. It's true. His wife told my wife.
 
2013-03-03 12:33:36 PM
Not sure how Joe Biden's hairline got into that article but ha ha ha I'm still laughing. He must be fun to live with, because, you know, he would make you laugh. Ha ha ha. And that's what women really like about men. Ha ha ha.
 
2013-03-03 12:33:57 PM

Mikey1969: rumpelstiltskin: From his Wikipedia page: He was married in August 2012

Snicker.

Yeah, the shine is definitely still on the apple.

Not that marriage is miserable in any way, but a year and a half means he's even still probably getting head purely because she felt like it.


It's actually less than a year. So your point is even truer.
 
2013-03-03 12:35:18 PM

Uchiha_Cycliste: There are some cases where this is true.


Absolutely, man. Read the rest of it. I was just bashing this guy for being a know-it-all jackass. There are no absolutes and not all situations are the same. I just hate his holier-than-thou approach. "If it works for me, you're an asshole because I'm awesome!"

I only know of a few really strong marriages where I just smile and think it would be cool to have that. It's nice to see the ones that work, but I've seen so many horror shows...

Just glad you're happy because that's really all that matters.
 
2013-03-03 12:36:08 PM
"he said, as we were changing in the gym locker room."

That's all I needed to hear to know this guy's an annoying douche.

It's not the ladies sewing circle.  There's no chit chat in the men's locker room.  Shower and GTFO.
 
2013-03-03 12:36:41 PM

Zelron: In other words, you say "Yes dear."  There's only two ways a wife is perfect.  Either you're submissive and do everything she says.  Or she's submissive and does everything you say.  Any other way you disagree and no one's perfect.


And the missuz sitting next to me says "And that's boring!"

/Luvez my missuz
//She luvez me
///We piss each other off sometimes, tho
 
2013-03-03 12:37:20 PM

thamike: mod3072: This. Sorry, but I'm not taking marriage advice from someone who is still basically on their honeymoon. I might as well take driving tips from my 14 year-old son. He has a drivers license now, so he must be an expert, right?

What maniac gave a 14 year old a drivers license?


I'm curious about this, too. Folks can get a permit here at 15. 
I have a 14 yr old boy. I don't think I'd want him driving yet.
 
2013-03-03 12:37:52 PM

Unlord: "he said, as we were changing in the gym locker room."

That's all I needed to hear to know this guy's an annoying douche.

It's not the ladies sewing circle.  There's no chit chat in the men's locker room.  Shower and GTFO.


To be fair, if you're going to go penis-watching, it's basic etiquette to strike up a conversation.
 
2013-03-03 12:38:32 PM
Although I am still married to the woman I married, the woman I am married to is not the woman I married...
 
2013-03-03 12:38:59 PM

Zelron: Uchiha_Cycliste: NewportBarGuy: A man-child who says he needs a woman to be a better man.

There are some cases where this is true.
For instance the deal I have going with my girlfriend. Though we've only been dating since July, we've been best friends forever. And for at least the last ten years we have had a deal worked out where if she tells me to do something I do it, and if she tells me not to do something I don't. No arguing, no discussion.
When she says you need to go to the hospital right now, I skedaddle to the closest hospital. When she says, no! you can't climb on that! I don't. I seem to lack that little voice that says 'hey, maybe that's not a good idea' so she provides it for me =D

\been best friends for almost 25 years (since we were 6)
\\been pretty deeply in love for at least a couple of years before we started dating. ♥

In other words, you say "Yes dear."  There's only two ways a wife is perfect.  Either you're submissive and do everything she says.  Or she's submissive and does everything you say.  Any other way you disagree and no one's perfect.


We do disagree sometimes, but it usually results in us both learning something and coming at something from different POVs that we share. Never on important things though. With the deal we have worked out, often I'll call or text her and ask if I can do this or that, or I'll let her know if something not good is happening and ask her advice. Other times I can just ask myself, if she were here... would she let me do this? And that's kept me pretty safe (ie not severely injured and alive =D)
We have some debate about this, but we suspect because of the way we grew up, and the influence we've had on each other's tastes over time has resulted in us pretty much feeling the same about most things. Everything important at least. Likewise because of how we've pulled each other through bad times there's no one that knows each of us better than us in the whole world =D. She knows what I'm thinking and vice versa, almost like mind reading.

Interestingly, most of our disagreements occur over subjects involving race. For instance (and this happened yesterday morning, before we drove me to the airport). We were discussing the NoFx song "Don't call me white" I interpret it as don't make assumptions based on race, she thinks they are avoiding and disregarding white privilege. But pretty much there are no situations where submission is required, we are always on the same wavelength. If we differ, we argue on the merits of the situation. An engineer and a doctor are an awesome couple.
 
2013-03-03 12:39:01 PM

MurphyMurphy: I find this alleged guy to have an extremely punchable face.


cdn.breitbart.com
s3.chelseafcblog.net
 
2013-03-03 12:41:38 PM

MurphyMurphy: Ambivalence: Is this the same guy who pontificated that he waited until marraige to have sex?

That guy was a royal douche.

Surprise! He still is.


Wow.  It's amazing I could tell that just by his writing style (I wouldn't remember his name or face).  You have to be a painfully brilliant douche to be that obvious.
 
2013-03-03 12:42:05 PM

FloydA: I never had a bad thing to say about any of my exes for the first six months we were together either.


That was my first thought. "Go ahead, idiot, and shine your newlywed wisdom all over the men who have 20-30 years in and be sure to share the secrets of how you've lasted this long." Even before my husband and I were married, I could tell you that our relationship wasn't perfect. No relationship is. And me venting or joking to my girlfriends (or him to his guy friends) is a perfectly normal and healthy way of getting that out. It has abso-farking-lutely nothing to do with peer pressure.

But yeah... I guess if my husband and I held it all in and then let it occasionally explode in some glorious screaming match every few days, we'd have a much better marriage. Personally, I prefer not having to sneak around my house to avoid the other people living in it. Having a husband who's more interested ripping off my yoga pants than griping about how I burned dinner doesn't hurt, either.

So I'll conclude... Either he's lying about how perfect things are, he's delusional, or this thing has maybe another year or two before it ends with one of them banging the neighbor and/or a murder/suicide.

/Married 10 years in May.
 
2013-03-03 12:42:38 PM
In a couple of months I will celebrate my 20th wedding anniversary with my wife.  We still love each other, and get along great.  But the author hasn't lived long enough or had enough experience in the world if he thinks a spouse, even a loving, kind, funny, happy, cool, sexy one, will not ever be a pain in the ass.  I try not to disparage my wife in front of others, but he's in a fantasy land if he thinks a good marriage never has any arguments or times when one or both partners are not perfect.  Sometimes my wife has been a pain in my ass.  Sometimes I've been a pain her hers.  A good marriage is not one that never experiences difficulties, but one in which both partners work through them together when they do occur.
 
2013-03-03 12:43:01 PM

Johnsnownw: My wife is a huge pain in the ass, and I love the hell out of her. That's the way it should be.

/Guy must have a boring sex life.


Probably only missionary and no beej, ever.

Sucks for him! (well she probably doesn't)
 
2013-03-03 12:43:08 PM

NewportBarGuy: Uchiha_Cycliste: There are some cases where this is true.

Absolutely, man. Read the rest of it. I was just bashing this guy for being a know-it-all jackass. There are no absolutes and not all situations are the same. I just hate his holier-than-thou approach. "If it works for me, you're an asshole because I'm awesome!"

I only know of a few really strong marriages where I just smile and think it would be cool to have that. It's nice to see the ones that work, but I've seen so many horror shows...

Just glad you're happy because that's really all that matters.


Thanks!
If this guy is the prick he sounds like, he'll get what's coming to him. To quote The Streets, "We met through a shared view, she loved me and I did too". She's gonne be unhappy when she realizes that he cares more for himself than her, and with any luck she'll make him miserable.

On a side note, we like to joke amongst ourselves about how backwards we've done things. Already best friends, and pretty much wanna spend the rest of our lives together, then found ourselves deeply and madly in love, and then we decided you know what, we should start dating. =P

\love her so much.
 
2013-03-03 12:45:40 PM
While I agree with the small kernal of a central principle that you shoot your own self in the foot by taking on the attitude that your partner is a pain in the ass and outwardly biatch about it....... yeah this guy is setting himself up for a world of disappointment.

A smug married of only 6 months, who only lost his virginity in the same time frame still thinks his wife hung the moon? Surely there is no other explanation for this other than that she is the world's perfect woman.
 
2013-03-03 12:45:44 PM

Unlord: "he said, as we were changing in the gym locker room."

That's all I needed to hear to know this guy's an annoying douche.

It's not the ladies sewing circle. There's no chit chat in the men's locker room. Shower and GTFO.


basically that comment is code to let his audience know that he is a closeted self-hater
 
2013-03-03 12:47:50 PM

FloydA: CujoQuarrel: That's disgusting

A married guy who won't disparage his spouse.

Utterly awful

I never had a bad thing to say about any of my exes for the first six months we were together either.


8 years here, and still never say anything negative about my wife. And partly because of that, our marriage just keeps getting better and better.
 
2013-03-03 12:48:03 PM

No_Good_Name: I am a pita. I expect my man to blow off steam with his friends and complain. Otherwise, it would just build up and he would resent me. I do the same to my friends. So, I can come home with a fresh perspective.


Exactly.  I don't know what kind of people the author hangs out with, but for most people I know (who don't genuinely have marital issues, in which case they're often looking for support from their friends to help them through a difficult time) most of the "complaining" just boils down to letting off steam about living in close quarters with someone you love but who isn't perfect.

Hence why I don't feel the need to march off in a huff, complaining about my vapors when I hear it.
 
2013-03-03 12:48:25 PM

kid_icarus: My gut reaction after reading TFA was, "...his wife is cheating on him."
Why? Because when you write an article like that, the universe can't resist. It has a dick-ish sense of humor.


I had the same gut reaction. It was when he said "I married somebody better than myself."

Someone better than you will get sick of you much quicker than you get sick of them. Of course this guy won`t badmouth his wife, she is much better than him. He won`t ever get sick of her. He knows that he is a coonts hair away from her realising she could do much better and deciding to fark the pool boy and then running off to Rio with half his money...
 
2013-03-03 12:48:33 PM
I read it as "when girly men get together, they moan about their wives."

/got no farther in the reading thing
 
2013-03-03 12:48:36 PM
I'm sure my husband thought I was amazing for the first year we were married. 
We're coming up at 22 years now. I'm sure he knows most of my faults by now.
 
2013-03-03 12:49:10 PM

Uchiha_Cycliste: We were discussing the NoFx song "Don't call me white" I interpret it as don't make assumptions based on race, she thinks they are avoiding and disregarding white privilege.


How that conversation doesn't end with the car swerving into the divider, I'll never know.
 
2013-03-03 12:50:03 PM
FTA Hold your nose though, because here comes the really cold water

Lolwut?
 
2013-03-03 12:50:22 PM

mafiageek1980: Uchiha_Cycliste: NewportBarGuy: A man-child who says he needs a woman to be a better man.

There are some cases where this is true.
For instance the deal I have going with my girlfriend. Though we've only been dating since July, we've been best friends forever. And for at least the last ten years we have had a deal worked out where if she tells me to do something I do it, and if she tells me not to do something I don't. No arguing, no discussion.
When she says you need to go to the hospital right now, I skedaddle to the closest hospital. When she says, no! you can't climb on that! I don't. I seem to lack that little voice that says 'hey, maybe that's not a good idea' so she provides it for me =D

\been best friends for almost 25 years (since we were 6)
\\been pretty deeply in love for at least a couple of years before we started dating. ♥

damn, it's a bit dusty here in casa de la mafiageek all the sudden!


would the dustiness be mitigated with the unavoidable irritation from us acting like young high school sweet hearts? =P

Heh, I think it's funny that for years now we've talked about marriage and kids and stuff, mostly in general terms for all our conversations but (apparently) it was in the back of both our minds that these conversations would possibly/probably actually be bout us. Also, I know her well enough that on a little vacation we took a while ago I asked her, no that's not right, i stated, you don't want to take my name if we get married do you. Which she agreed. What was neat was that we both knew her answer but it took a long time for us to dig down into why she said no. Well, the obvious solution is that I'll take her name. All that's important to me is that were we to get married we have the same last name as a symbolic statement that we are starting a family together. I don't particularly care if we keep mine, or I have hers as long as ew share the same surname.  I know it ages down the road, but I can't wait to be married.
 
2013-03-03 12:50:36 PM

ISO15693: FloydA: CujoQuarrel: That's disgusting

A married guy who won't disparage his spouse.

Utterly awful

I never had a bad thing to say about any of my exes for the first six months we were together either.

8 years here, and still never say anything negative about my wife. And partly because of that, our marriage just keeps getting better and better.


3 years for me.  My biggest complaint is the broad keeps getting in my way in the kitchen.  She needs to stay the fark out.  I cook, she cleans.
 
2013-03-03 12:51:21 PM

megalynn44: While I agree with the small kernal of a central principle that you shoot your own self in the foot by taking on the attitude that your partner is a pain in the ass and outwardly biatch about it....... yeah this guy is setting himself up for a world of disappointment.

A smug married of only 6 months, who only lost his virginity in the same time frame still thinks his wife hung the moon? Surely there is no other explanation for this other than that she is the world's perfect woman.


Codependency is a b*tch.
 
2013-03-03 12:51:23 PM

Mrbogey: Uchiha_Cycliste: We were discussing the NoFx song "Don't call me white" I interpret it as don't make assumptions based on race, she thinks they are avoiding and disregarding white privilege.

How that conversation doesn't end with the car swerving into the divider, I'll never know.


we were in bed drinking the morning coffee =D. I drove us to the airport 5 min later, then she drove to work and I went home =(.
 
2013-03-03 12:51:56 PM

Ambivalence: Is this the same guy who pontificated that he waited until marraige to have sex?

That guy was a royal douche.


OH, he`s THAT guy!

/he MUST be trolling the interwebs, there`s no way someone could be THAT much of a douche...
//that or he isn`t telling is he has sex with the children he has locked in the basement
 
2013-03-03 12:52:10 PM

Paul Baumer: FTA Hold your nose though, because here comes the really cold water

Lolwut?


Waterboarding is a staple of right wing humor.
 
2013-03-03 12:52:19 PM

ThatGuyFromTheInternet: Mikey1969: rumpelstiltskin: From his Wikipedia page: He was married in August 2012

Snicker.

Yeah, the shine is definitely still on the apple.

Not that marriage is miserable in any way, but a year and a half means he's even still probably getting head purely because she felt like it.

It's actually less than a year. So your point is even truer.


Oh shiat, you're right... Been a bit out of it all weekend, I was doing math for Aug of `11..
 
2013-03-03 12:54:58 PM
Twenty bucks says he's a wife beater, now or later.
 
2013-03-03 12:54:59 PM
His wife is cheating on him.  For a guy like this, that's an automatic.
Can't wait to see him turn into Sam Kinison after he gets divorced.

www.biography.com
 
2013-03-03 12:55:03 PM

thamike: megalynn44: While I agree with the small kernal of a central principle that you shoot your own self in the foot by taking on the attitude that your partner is a pain in the ass and outwardly biatch about it....... yeah this guy is setting himself up for a world of disappointment.

A smug married of only 6 months, who only lost his virginity in the same time frame still thinks his wife hung the moon? Surely there is no other explanation for this other than that she is the world's perfect woman.

Codependency is a b*tch.


9th grade english. I had an old crone for a teacher that was (or acted like a romantic) and had us role play / read Romeo and Juliet in class and then write an essay. I wrote my essay on the fallacies of codependency. She was unamused =D.

Also y'all that have seen Warm bodies? It's a reverse Romeo and Juliet. Even down to the names. Julia and R... I'd wager that R is Romeo. ;) and thinking so make me happy. They even had the balcony scene/

\Juliet says hey it's Romeo, you nearly gimme me a heart attack
\\He's underneath the window she's singing hey la my boyfriend's back
\\\You shouldn't come around here singing up at people like that
\\\\Anyway what you gonna do about it?
 
2013-03-03 12:55:05 PM
There is a scene in Requiem for a Dream where Marion imagines herself stabbing her date in the hand with a fork, screaming "YOU SMUG F*CK!!!"

I'm imagining the same about this guy right now.
 
2013-03-03 12:55:22 PM
I have no idea who his wife is, but it is my new life's mission to introduce her to Hernando, who would leave her wrapped, twisted around damp sheets, panting and hair-matted and with claw-marks across the nightstand that she would shamefacedly have to explain to this horrifically unfunny hack writer hubby of hers.
 
2013-03-03 01:02:01 PM

Uchiha_Cycliste: 9th grade english. I had an old crone for a teacher that was (or acted like a romantic) and had us role play / read Romeo and Juliet in class and then write an essay. I wrote my essay on the fallacies of codependency. She was unamused =D.


12th grade English.  My  teacher wanted us to write about how The Godfather mirrors Macbeth for our final essay.  We had an option to disagree.  I wrote an entire paper--a well written one with citations and footnotes--about how they in no way  mirrored one another (besides the point that power is a corrupter, which is too vague a concept to make a declarative comparison).  I had to fight off a D, because apparently this dipsh*t had fancied himself a genius for coming up with the idea, and took my response personally.

I have yet to find an educational department more full of sh*t on average than high school English departments.
 
2013-03-03 01:03:27 PM
My husband and I knew each other for 13 years before we got married, and we are rapidly approaching our silver anniversary.  We constantly harp at each other, the nagging and whining are legendary, and the best part is neither of us is afraid to say exactly what's on our mind to the other.  I absolutely despise women who act all sweetness and light around their spouses, and then as soon as they are in different locales, blammo, out pop the real feelings and thoughts.  Hell, even my kids picked up on the number of adults that are two-faced around their significant others, and my kids aren't the sharpest knives in the drawer.

Nobody's perfect, and grow up.
 
2013-03-03 01:04:52 PM
The key to a good marriage is to provoke key arguments on your terms on stuff you have a strong opinion about. If you can steer her to the conclusion you wanted in the first place, and let her think she won, who REALLY won?

Look dumbfounded anytime your wife is yelling at you on her terms about anything else. She'll drop it quick. And just do whatever she tells you when she's angry. You're going to do it anyway.
 
2013-03-03 01:04:54 PM
biatching about your wife 1. Makes you a biatch. 2. Is like telling everyone you don't lock your doors and you don't own weapons. Nobody else is tired of her shiat. I rarely hear men complain about their wives.
Complain away about your ex. It makes you look bad, keep that in mind.
If you complain about your girlfriend, you should just die.
 
2013-03-03 01:04:57 PM

thamike: Uchiha_Cycliste: 9th grade english. I had an old crone for a teacher that was (or acted like a romantic) and had us role play / read Romeo and Juliet in class and then write an essay. I wrote my essay on the fallacies of codependency. She was unamused =D.

12th grade English.  My  teacher wanted us to write about how The Godfather mirrors Macbeth for our final essay.  We had an option to disagree.  I wrote an entire paper--a well written one with citations and footnotes--about how they in no way  mirrored one another (besides the point that power is a corrupter, which is too vague a concept to make a declarative comparison).  I had to fight off a D, because apparently this dipsh*t had fancied himself a genius for coming up with the idea, and took my response personally.

I have yet to find an educational department more full of sh*t on average than high school English departments.


yeah, I considered my essay pretty well written, but my abysmal score reflected our *ah hem* differences in opinion. =/
 
2013-03-03 01:04:59 PM

ThatGuyFromTheInternet: Mikey1969: rumpelstiltskin: From his Wikipedia page: He was married in August 2012

Snicker.

Yeah, the shine is definitely still on the apple.

Not that marriage is miserable in any way, but a year and a half means he's even still probably getting head purely because she felt like it.

It's actually less than a year. So your point is even truer.


THIS. Every time a friend, family member or co-worker gets married I know that somewhere between 6 months to 2 years the "You know how to keep a marriage together? Well let me tell you..." crap is coming. It's the same thing with kids too. People have a new baby and you know the old Advice Train is coming down the line somewhere.

Unlord: "he said, as we were changing in the gym locker room."

That's all I needed to hear to know this guy's an annoying douche.

It's not the ladies sewing circle.  There's no chit chat in the men's locker room.  Shower and GTFO.


ALSO THIS.
 
2013-03-03 01:05:17 PM
None of my friends who were at the 6 month mark in a relationship have ever been all "Let me explain relationships to you all". But I have known people who went to Law School and Medical School, and they were all about as insufferable as can be for the first year about law and medicine, respectively.

I'm assuming this guy is doing the same thing, just regarding his weirdo wife.
 
2013-03-03 01:06:17 PM
I have to say, as someone who hears the female and male version of this all this time, yeah, I'm with this guy, STFU. If you marry a man-child\shrewish biatch,  go figure out a way to make it work or get a divorce, but don't clutter up girl\guy time with biatching about it. "Oh, yeah, last Tuesday I had to help my husband run the dishwasher, he just couldn't figure it out, ha ha!" "My wife's such a biatch, she's calling me every ten seconds to be sure I'm not cheating, ha ha!".

I mean, I'm sure this is funny to some people, but the rest of us are looking at you and idly considering introducing your head to a large blunt object to fix whatever obvious brain damage you had marrying such a nimrod in the first place.
 
2013-03-03 01:06:59 PM
If you have that much to biatch about, you need a new wife.

If you have kids, sorry man, you're permafarked.
 
2013-03-03 01:07:14 PM

Uchiha_Cycliste: thamike: Uchiha_Cycliste: 9th grade english. I had an old crone for a teacher that was (or acted like a romantic) and had us role play / read Romeo and Juliet in class and then write an essay. I wrote my essay on the fallacies of codependency. She was unamused =D.

12th grade English.  My  teacher wanted us to write about how The Godfather mirrors Macbeth for our final essay.  We had an option to disagree.  I wrote an entire paper--a well written one with citations and footnotes--about how they in no way  mirrored one another (besides the point that power is a corrupter, which is too vague a concept to make a declarative comparison).  I had to fight off a D, because apparently this dipsh*t had fancied himself a genius for coming up with the idea, and took my response personally.

I have yet to find an educational department more full of sh*t on average than high school English departments.

yeah, I considered my essay pretty well written, but my abysmal score reflected our *ah hem* differences in opinion. =/


Don't take it personally... English class is more of a... "write what the teacher/professor" believes and not so much a "Write what you believe..."
 
2013-03-03 01:08:19 PM

Uchiha_Cycliste: mafiageek1980: Uchiha_Cycliste: NewportBarGuy: A man-child who says he needs a woman to be a better man.

There are some cases where this is true.
For instance the deal I have going with my girlfriend. Though we've only been dating since July, we've been best friends forever. And for at least the last ten years we have had a deal worked out where if she tells me to do something I do it, and if she tells me not to do something I don't. No arguing, no discussion.
When she says you need to go to the hospital right now, I skedaddle to the closest hospital. When she says, no! you can't climb on that! I don't. I seem to lack that little voice that says 'hey, maybe that's not a good idea' so she provides it for me =D

\been best friends for almost 25 years (since we were 6)
\\been pretty deeply in love for at least a couple of years before we started dating. ♥

damn, it's a bit dusty here in casa de la mafiageek all the sudden!

would the dustiness be mitigated with the unavoidable irritation from us acting like young high school sweet hearts? =P

Heh, I think it's funny that for years now we've talked about marriage and kids and stuff, mostly in general terms for all our conversations but (apparently) it was in the back of both our minds that these conversations would possibly/probably actually be bout us. Also, I know her well enough that on a little vacation we took a while ago I asked her, no that's not right, i stated, you don't want to take my name if we get married do you. Which she agreed. What was neat was that we both knew her answer but it took a long time for us to dig down into why she said no. Well, the obvious solution is that I'll take her name. All that's important to me is that were we to get married we have the same last name as a symbolic statement that we are starting a family together. I don't particularly care if we keep mine, or I have hers as long as ew share the same surname.  I know it ages down the road, but I can't wait to be married.


Taking her name is expensive and difficult bro. Good luck.
 
2013-03-03 01:09:37 PM

Uchiha_Cycliste: yeah, I considered my essay pretty well written, but my abysmal score reflected our *ah hem* differences in opinion. =/


In 7th grade I got a D on a "what I wanna be when i grow up" essay because "Cartoonist isn't a real career."  I'm not paraphrasing.   That was the only reason for the grade.
 
2013-03-03 01:11:50 PM
Steven Crowder is just a troll Fox gets to stand in when Dennis Miller is unavailable or they don't want to pay his fee. His goal is to agitate, not inform, educate or otherwise further the discussion of whatever topic his fishing with.

DNFTT
i.imgur.com
 
2013-03-03 01:12:44 PM
Married 32 years to the right one. Good luck finding one today.
 
2013-03-03 01:14:15 PM
The two biggest arguments my husband and I have ever had in 10 years of marriage:

1. The Great Chicken Salad Sandwich Debate of 2007. This was a basic Arby's versus Chick-fil-A argument that turned into a shouting match.

2. The yelling match that started over which of us could hook up the television to the myriad of gaming consoles we have in our possession the fastest. After an hour of him fumbling with various cords, I did it in about two minutes. I still don't let him set up the electronic devices. Seriously, I recently shoved him out of my office chair after he attempted to learn Windows 8 and decided to instead go with Google for a solution to my problem.

I also yell at him from time to time when he gets my takeout order wrong.
 
2013-03-03 01:18:11 PM
Haters gonna hate. That said, you may want to wait till the first year is wrapped up before dispensing marriage advice.
 
2013-03-03 01:19:51 PM

mainstreet62: The key to a good marriage is to provoke key arguments on your terms on stuff you have a strong opinion about. If you can steer her to the conclusion you wanted in the first place, and let her think she won, who REALLY won?

Look dumbfounded anytime your wife is yelling at you on her terms about anything else. She'll drop it quick. And just do whatever she tells you when she's angry. You're going to do it anyway.


Or you can get a boat and learn to fish.
 
2013-03-03 01:20:35 PM

PsiChick: I have to say, as someone who hears the female and male version of this all this time, yeah, I'm with this guy, STFU. If you marry a man-child\shrewish biatch,  go figure out a way to make it work or get a divorce, but don't clutter up girl\guy time with biatching about it. "Oh, yeah, last Tuesday I had to help my husband run the dishwasher, he just couldn't figure it out, ha ha!" "My wife's such a biatch, she's calling me every ten seconds to be sure I'm not cheating, ha ha!".

I mean, I'm sure this is funny to some people, but the rest of us are looking at you and idly considering introducing your head to a large blunt object to fix whatever obvious brain damage you had marrying such a nimrod in the first place.


I have a relative who lives to biatch about her spouse. I just don't engage anymore. Yeah, we know. He sucks. You hate him and it's plain as day you should leave but won't. There's really nothing for me to say here.
 
2013-03-03 01:21:33 PM

Donkey Hodie: In a couple of months I will celebrate my 20th wedding anniversary with my wife.



Good choice!  I tried celebrating an anniversary with somebody else's wife once.  Didn't work out so well.
 
2013-03-03 01:22:44 PM

megalynn44: I have a relative who lives to biatch about her spouse. I just don't engage anymore. Yeah, we know. He sucks. You hate him and it's plain as day you should leave but won't. There's really nothing for me to say here.


Start a dead pool with the rest of your friends.
 
2013-03-03 01:23:53 PM
What's this guy's fixation with other guys doing squats?
 
2013-03-03 01:26:51 PM

Wendy's Chili: What's this guy's fixation with other guys doing squats?


images.politico.com
 
2013-03-03 01:27:31 PM

CujoQuarrel: That's disgusting

A married guy who won't disparage his spouse.

Utterly awful


Well, duh. His wife didn't give him permission.  That should be obvious.
 
2013-03-03 01:27:39 PM

supayoda: The two biggest arguments my husband and I have ever had in 10 years of marriage:

1. The Great Chicken Salad Sandwich Debate of 2007. This was a basic Arby's versus Chick-fil-A argument that turned into a shouting match.

2. The yelling match that started over which of us could hook up the television to the myriad of gaming consoles we have in our possession the fastest. After an hour of him fumbling with various cords, I did it in about two minutes. I still don't let him set up the electronic devices. Seriously, I recently shoved him out of my office chair after he attempted to learn Windows 8 and decided to instead go with Google for a solution to my problem.

I also yell at him from time to time when he gets my takeout order wrong.


Our last argument was because I was looking up plans to build an adult sized soap box racer. The future Mrs. titwrench explained that I was not allowed to build it until I finish my hovercraft. I protested, she won.
 
kth
2013-03-03 01:29:32 PM

Uchiha_Cycliste: Mrbogey: Uchiha_Cycliste: We were discussing the NoFx song "Don't call me white" I interpret it as don't make assumptions based on race, she thinks they are avoiding and disregarding white privilege.

How that conversation doesn't end with the car swerving into the divider, I'll never know.

we were in bed drinking the morning coffee =D. I drove us to the airport 5 min later, then she drove to work and I went home =(.


That makes me smile so very very much. I love the random conversations that happen while snuggling.

My husband and I had a long conversation a few nights ago before we went to sleep about how if corporations are people too (my friend), then can they get married? And if so, how can we be sure of gender so they don't (gasp) get gay married?  And at what point is a subsidiary considered alive? Yeah, we're dorks.
 
2013-03-03 01:31:01 PM

Uchiha_Cycliste: NewportBarGuy: A man-child who says he needs a woman to be a better man.

There are some cases where this is true.
For instance the deal I have going with my girlfriend. Though we've only been dating since July, we've been best friends forever. And for at least the last ten years we have had a deal worked out where if she tells me to do something I do it, and if she tells me not to do something I don't. No arguing, no discussion.
When she says you need to go to the hospital right now, I skedaddle to the closest hospital. When she says, no! you can't climb on that! I don't. I seem to lack that little voice that says 'hey, maybe that's not a good idea' so she provides it for me =D

\been best friends for almost 25 years (since we were 6)
\\been pretty deeply in love for at least a couple of years before we started dating. ♥


Good for you, and much happiness.
/been married to my best friend for 23 years... Dated her for 9 years before that
 
2013-03-03 01:35:48 PM
I think there is a difference between biatching about something your spouse has done and them personally.    I don't see an issue with the 1st unless it's constantly.  The 2nd however indicates to me that you really are incompatible and probably making each other unhappy.  If you attack the person constantly or personally then it may be best to rethink your relationship.  With that said  e all do something stupid or irritating to the other person at some point.  I think what makes a lasting marriage is the ability to overcome those issues/times.

As for the author, thanks for the advice and after giving it some thought I don't think your advice is helpful for a healthy long term relationship over the years.  Being upset about something that bothers you and not getting it off your chest doesn't strike me as the best course of action.
 
2013-03-03 01:37:09 PM
The Douche masterfully separated his beautiful new wife from a modest guy who really loved her, by employing bluster and coercion.  Her resentment is building every second and will be brought to a head when he is discovered with the pool boy in the cabana.  Or the cabana boy in the pool.
 
2013-03-03 01:37:13 PM
This is why gay men should be allowed to get married.  Neither one will ever complain about his wife.
 
2013-03-03 01:37:13 PM

Smeggy Smurf: I used to be a pain in my wife's butt then I started using a better lube


Winner!!!
 
2013-03-03 01:38:46 PM
// think 38 years but I'll have to ask :)
 
2013-03-03 01:38:53 PM
Check out his other articles.

http://www.foxnews.com/archive/author/steven-crowder/index.html

Pretty sure half of those have been greened here before.
 
2013-03-03 01:39:56 PM

supayoda: The two biggest arguments my husband and I have ever had in 10 years of marriage:

1. The Great Chicken Salad Sandwich Debate of 2007. This was a basic Arby's versus Chick-fil-A argument that turned into a shouting match.

2. The yelling match that started over which of us could hook up the television to the myriad of gaming consoles we have in our possession the fastest. After an hour of him fumbling with various cords, I did it in about two minutes. I still don't let him set up the electronic devices. Seriously, I recently shoved him out of my office chair after he attempted to learn Windows 8 and decided to instead go with Google for a solution to my problem.

I also yell at him from time to time when he gets my takeout order wrong.


Takeout the garbage? How can he go wrong?

/loves Chick-Fil-a. Too bad we have none up here in the Great Northwest.
//when I'm in need of a lube job there's a Popeye's down the road.
 
2013-03-03 01:41:27 PM
From somewheres on teh interwebs...

For those of you that want to know what it's like to be in a serious relationship with a woman - I just found out that I'm on the third day of an argument that I didn't know I was having.
 
2013-03-03 01:42:16 PM

towatchoverme: I have no idea who his wife is, but it is my new life's mission to introduce her to Hernando, who would leave her wrapped, twisted around damp sheets, panting and hair-matted and with claw-marks across the nightstand that she would shamefacedly have to explain to this horrifically unfunny hack writer hubby of hers.


Hernando?  Your gardener?
 
2013-03-03 01:44:10 PM

Smeggy Smurf: I used to be a pain in my wife's butt then I started using a better lube


vudukungfu: Carrot AND stick.
Cna't have one with out the other.



Two unrelated comments, yet somehow they go perfectly together.
 
2013-03-03 01:44:55 PM

hutchkc: As for the author, thanks for the advice and after giving it some thought I don't think your advice is helpful for a healthy long term relationship over the years. Being upset about something that bothers you and not getting it off your chest doesn't strike me as the best course of action.


Can you imagine being in a gym and saying to an acquaintance, "Man oh man, gotta go back home to the wife and pretend she knows how to cook, know what i mean?."  And some gladhanding meathead goes, "No, I don't know what you mean.  My marriage's perfect."  It's a weaponized form of self loathing.
 
2013-03-03 01:47:59 PM

ISO15693: 8 years here, and still never say anything negative about my wife. And partly because of that, our marriage just keeps getting better and better.


7 years married, and I *do* say negative things. They're usually to her, and phrased in a polite, constructive manner. Also, they're usually said after some thought, but not after a long enough period of time to allow resentment or anger to build up. It's the first lesson I learned. She does the same for me. "It bothers me when you do X, Y, or Z." Discussion ensues, an agreement is reached, problem solved.

As for the "lack of sex in marriage" jokes, yeah, that happens. It happens because there are more important things to do in an ever increasingly hectic life, and with anything, the thrill wears off unless you keep it interesting. What have you done lately for her in that area? If you're trying (and not just ham-fisted attempts at shoving your dick in her mouth) and she still in disinterested, maybe divorce is right for you. Or try having a talk.
 
2013-03-03 01:50:23 PM
Why are people mad at this guy? Because he won't talk crap about his wife to strangers at the gym?  What a  monster.
Yeah sure, he probably won't feel quite this schoompy once he's been married longer, but the general idea--don't hate your spouse, don't talk shiat about them in public--is a pretty sound one, I think.
 
2013-03-03 01:52:19 PM

homelessdude: Steven Crowder is just a troll Fox gets to stand in when Dennis Miller is unavailable or they don't want to pay his fee. His goal is to agitate, not inform, educate or otherwise further the discussion of whatever topic his fishing with.

DNFTT
[i.imgur.com image 225x195]


I agree in general. I don't see what's wrong with what he said in this particular article, though.
 
2013-03-03 01:55:55 PM

eddiesocket: Why are people mad at this guy? Because he won't talk crap about his wife to strangers at the gym? What a monster.


Nobody's mad at the guy.  They're calling him out for being a glib asshole.  Nobody asked him to talk crap about his wife to strangers at the gym.  In fact, nobody asked him to talk to strangers at the gym in the first place.  Because of whatever personality disorder he has, he feels compelled to aim the only positive thing he imagines he has--a perfect marriage--at other men to make them feel more inferior than he does.  That's open hostility in its most banal form.
 
2013-03-03 01:58:40 PM

Wendy's Chili: What's this guy's fixation with other guys doing squats?


Because if you're going to insult your wife, you better at least have a nice round ass that he can ogle?
 
2013-03-03 02:00:26 PM

Koodz: Uchiha_Cycliste: mafiageek1980: Uchiha_Cycliste: NewportBarGuy: A man-child who says he needs a woman to be a better man.

There are some cases where this is true.
For instance the deal I have going with my girlfriend. Though we've only been dating since July, we've been best friends forever. And for at least the last ten years we have had a deal worked out where if she tells me to do something I do it, and if she tells me not to do something I don't. No arguing, no discussion.
When she says you need to go to the hospital right now, I skedaddle to the closest hospital. When she says, no! you can't climb on that! I don't. I seem to lack that little voice that says 'hey, maybe that's not a good idea' so she provides it for me =D

\been best friends for almost 25 years (since we were 6)
\\been pretty deeply in love for at least a couple of years before we started dating. ♥

damn, it's a bit dusty here in casa de la mafiageek all the sudden!

would the dustiness be mitigated with the unavoidable irritation from us acting like young high school sweet hearts? =P

Heh, I think it's funny that for years now we've talked about marriage and kids and stuff, mostly in general terms for all our conversations but (apparently) it was in the back of both our minds that these conversations would possibly/probably actually be bout us. Also, I know her well enough that on a little vacation we took a while ago I asked her, no that's not right, i stated, you don't want to take my name if we get married do you. Which she agreed. What was neat was that we both knew her answer but it took a long time for us to dig down into why she said no. Well, the obvious solution is that I'll take her name. All that's important to me is that were we to get married we have the same last name as a symbolic statement that we are starting a family together. I don't particularly care if we keep mine, or I have hers as long as ew share the same surname.  I know it ages down the road, but I can't wait to be m ...


Taking her name is expensive and difficult bro. Good luck.

But.... it's easier for me than her. She's a doc, got licenses and stuff, and I don't.it makes sense... also screw the patriarchy =D
 
2013-03-03 02:04:40 PM

eddiesocket: I agree in general. I don't see what's wrong with what he said in this particular article, though.


1 - His tone.  He's lecturing and self-righteous.
2 - His woefully ignorant point of view. Conflict is a natural part of marriage, men discuss it sometimes flippantly.  To do so is not the downfall of marriage or Western civilization.
3 - His conclusion.  He actually demands his readers rethink how they address their respective wives, but only after an article filled with a semi-coherent rant full of his opinion and no facts.
I realize his screed passes for a PhD thesis on Fox News where denying science is considered rational, reasonable and patriotic, but for anyone who wants a citation more credible than this drooling, closet knob gobbler's opinion it just won't do.

That help you any?
 
2013-03-03 02:04:44 PM

Johnsnownw: My wife is a huge pain in the ass, and I love the hell out of her. That's the way it should be.

/Guy must have a boring sex life.



Hate to do it, but "this".  My wife of 15 years is cray cray and an unpredictable uncontrollable pain in the ass.  Guess what?  I have my own shortcomings she lives with too.  I wouldn't have it any other way.

///Plenty of sex.

////Helps that we both try to keep it together exercise wise and look pretty good for oldsters.
 
2013-03-03 02:06:05 PM

Ambivalence: MurphyMurphy: Ambivalence: Is this the same guy who pontificated that he waited until marraige to have sex?

That guy was a royal douche.

Surprise! He still is.

Wow.  It's amazing I could tell that just by his writing style (I wouldn't remember his name or face).  You have to be a painfully brilliant douche to be that obvious.


Maybe he's still too amazed and grateful for finally getting laid. Also, saying your spouse is a pain in the ass is just blowing off steam.
 
2013-03-03 02:07:36 PM

notatrollorami: Johnsnownw: My wife is a huge pain in the ass, and I love the hell out of her. That's the way it should be.

/Guy must have a boring sex life.


Hate to do it, but "this".  My wife of 15 years is cray cray and an unpredictable uncontrollable pain in the ass.  Guess what?  I have my own shortcomings she lives with too.  I wouldn't have it any other way.

///Plenty of sex.

////Helps that we both try to keep it together exercise wise and look pretty good for oldsters.


Out of curiosity - kids or no kids?
 
2013-03-03 02:08:30 PM
It's not the ladies sewing circle.  There's no chit chat in the men's locker room.  Shower and GTFO.

thamike:To be fair, if you're going to go penis-watching, it's basic etiquette to strike up a conversation.

Are you insane? That's precisely why we  don't strike up conversations. So we can have plausible deniability when we get caught peeking.

Maybe if you wanted to  be watched, you could be a little chatty. But not if you're watching. Jeez, it's n00bs like you, making everyone all suspicious and guarded, who make it tough for me to get my gym bag with the hidden camera positioned just right.
 
2013-03-03 02:08:55 PM

Uchiha_Cycliste: NewportBarGuy: A man-child who says he needs a woman to be a better man.

There are some cases where this is true.
For instance the deal I have going with my girlfriend. Though we've only been dating since July, we've been best friends forever. And for at least the last ten years we have had a deal worked out where if she tells me to do something I do it, and if she tells me not to do something I don't. No arguing, no discussion.
When she says you need to go to the hospital right now, I skedaddle to the closest hospital. When she says, no! you can't climb on that! I don't. I seem to lack that little voice that says 'hey, maybe that's not a good idea' so she provides it for me =D

\been best friends for almost 25 years (since we were 6)
\\been pretty deeply in love for at least a couple of years before we started dating. ♥



Good for you!  You're gonna get snark by I think that's badass.
 
2013-03-03 02:09:18 PM

technofiend: eddiesocket: I agree in general. I don't see what's wrong with what he said in this particular article, though.

1 - His tone.  He's lecturing and self-righteous.
2 - His woefully ignorant point of view. Conflict is a natural part of marriage, men discuss it sometimes flippantly.  To do so is not the downfall of marriage or Western civilization.
3 - His conclusion.  He actually demands his readers rethink how they address their respective wives, but only after an article filled with a semi-coherent rant full of his opinion and no facts.
I realize his screed passes for a PhD thesis on Fox News where denying science is considered rational, reasonable and patriotic, but for anyone who wants a citation more credible than this drooling, closet knob gobbler's opinion it just won't do.

That help you any?


And let's not forget that the gym story was probably fabricated in order to justify all of the above.  How many levels of pathetic is that?
 
2013-03-03 02:11:09 PM

thamike: Wendy's Chili: What's this guy's fixation with other guys doing squats?

[images.politico.com image 605x328]


dayum.. are those 80ib dumbells Paul Ryan is curling?  dude may be skinny but he is strong as an ox!
 
2013-03-03 02:12:44 PM
FTA "Here's my challenge to the real men out there; it's very simple. If you have a good marriage, talk about it. If you love your wife, say it. If some moron tells you that you're merely a "newlywed" or that you're still just "too young to understand," correct them. Openhanded slaps to the face are preferable.'

Um, who slaps another guy in the face?
 
2013-03-03 02:12:44 PM

semiotix: It's not the ladies sewing circle.  There's no chit chat in the men's locker room.  Shower and GTFO.

thamike:To be fair, if you're going to go penis-watching, it's basic etiquette to strike up a conversation.

Are you insane? That's precisely why we  don't strike up conversations. So we can have plausible deniability when we get caught peeking.

Maybe if you wanted to  be watched, you could be a little chatty. But not if you're watching. Jeez, it's n00bs like you, making everyone all suspicious and guarded, who make it tough for me to get my gym bag with the hidden camera positioned just right.


I scream in German while I bugeye everybody's junk.  Now who's the noob, creeper?
 
2013-03-03 02:13:53 PM
jdawg3k:
Um, who slaps another guy in the face?

Dead people and Kurt Russell.
 
2013-03-03 02:17:43 PM

eddiesocket: Why are people mad at this guy? Because he won't talk crap about his wife to strangers at the gym?  What a  monster.
Yeah sure, he probably won't feel quite this schoompy once he's been married longer, but the general idea--don't hate your spouse, don't talk shiat about them in public--is a pretty sound one, I think.


Regardless if he ever talks bad about his wife or not, he didn't need to bother the other guy who just needed to vent.  Venting sometimes needs to happen.  I had a coworker that was going through a hard time with his wife and he would vent like mad at work.  Once, he called her a whore, which caused me to wince.  They later worked it out and got back together, maybe his venting allowed him to cool down so he could talk to her again.  Frustrations builds, for sanity's sake we need the understanding ear to either nod or give us some words of wisdom.  Judging someone who is frustrated will only mean they will now be angry with you.  He isn't a monster, but he is an obvious troll.

/I don't consider locker rooms to be public exactly, I would hope some privacy would take place
//Although, watch your words if an in-law is in the room
 
2013-03-03 02:17:45 PM
I don't think he realizes just how stupid he sounds. I also attempted to listen to one of his stand-up shows and he sounds like a cross between Dane Cook and someone else equally as unfunny.

Anyone who thinks their partner is the epitome of perfection, with no fault ever, should probably have never married in the first place. You don't know someone until you've lived with them.
 
2013-03-03 02:19:59 PM

Uchiha_Cycliste: mafiageek1980: Uchiha_Cycliste: NewportBarGuy: A man-child who says he needs a woman to be a better man.

There are some cases where this is true.
For instance the deal I have going with my girlfriend. Though we've only been dating since July, we've been best friends forever. And for at least the last ten years we have had a deal worked out where if she tells me to do something I do it, and if she tells me not to do something I don't. No arguing, no discussion.
When she says you need to go to the hospital right now, I skedaddle to the closest hospital. When she says, no! you can't climb on that! I don't. I seem to lack that little voice that says 'hey, maybe that's not a good idea' so she provides it for me =D

\been best friends for almost 25 years (since we were 6)
\\been pretty deeply in love for at least a couple of years before we started dating. ♥

damn, it's a bit dusty here in casa de la mafiageek all the sudden!

would the dustiness be mitigated with the unavoidable irritation from us acting like young high school sweet hearts? =P

Heh, I think it's funny that for years now we've talked about marriage and kids and stuff, mostly in general terms for all our conversations but (apparently) it was in the back of both our minds that these conversations would possibly/probably actually be bout us. Also, I know her well enough that on a little vacation we took a while ago I asked her, no that's not right, i stated, you don't want to take my name if we get married do you. Which she agreed. What was neat was that we both knew her answer but it took a long time for us to dig down into why she said no. Well, the obvious solution is that I'll take her name. All that's important to me is that were we to get married we have the same last name as a symbolic statement that we are starting a family together. I don't particularly care if we keep mine, or I have hers as long as ew share the same surname.  I know it ages down the road, but I can't wait to be married.



OK now I'm starting to think you're trolling.  She doesn't have to take your name, of course that's reasonable, but you're going to take hers?  Just go ahead and slice of your nads and hang them on a chain around her neck rather than be weakly metaphorical about it.
 
2013-03-03 02:22:00 PM

Uchiha_Cycliste: Zelron: Uchiha_Cycliste: NewportBarGuy: A man-child who says he needs a woman to be a better man.

There are some cases where this is true.
For instance the deal I have going with my girlfriend. Though we've only been dating since July, we've been best friends forever. And for at least the last ten years we have had a deal worked out where if she tells me to do something I do it, and if she tells me not to do something I don't. No arguing, no discussion.
When she says you need to go to the hospital right now, I skedaddle to the closest hospital. When she says, no! you can't climb on that! I don't. I seem to lack that little voice that says 'hey, maybe that's not a good idea' so she provides it for me =D

\been best friends for almost 25 years (since we were 6)
\\been pretty deeply in love for at least a couple of years before we started dating. ♥

In other words, you say "Yes dear."  There's only two ways a wife is perfect.  Either you're submissive and do everything she says.  Or she's submissive and does everything you say.  Any other way you disagree and no one's perfect.

We do disagree sometimes, but it usually results in us both learning something and coming at something from different POVs that we share. Never on important things though. With the deal we have worked out, often I'll call or text her and ask if I can do this or that, or I'll let her know if something not good is happening and ask her advice. Other times I can just ask myself, if she were here... would she let me do this? And that's kept me pretty safe (ie not severely injured and alive =D)
We have some debate about this, but we suspect because of the way we grew up, and the influence we've had on each other's tastes over time has resulted in us pretty much feeling the same about most things. Everything important at least. Likewise because of how we've pulled each other through bad times there's no one that knows each of us better than us in the whole world =D. She knows what I'm thinking and vice versa, almost like mind reading.

Interestingly, most of our disagreements occur over subjects involving race. For instance (and this happened yesterday morning, before we drove me to the airport). We were discussing the NoFx song "Don't call me white" I interpret it as don't make assumptions based on race, she thinks they are avoiding and disregarding white privilege. But pretty much there are no situations where submission is required, we are always on the same wavelength. If we differ, we argue on the merits of the situation. An engineer and a doctor are an awesome couple.


Fat Mike is also a douche
And show pony but that's a good tune about a dirty white boy that can't admit he's part of the problem
 
2013-03-03 02:29:37 PM

kth: Uchiha_Cycliste: Mrbogey: Uchiha_Cycliste: We were discussing the NoFx song "Don't call me white" I interpret it as don't make assumptions based on race, she thinks they are avoiding and disregarding white privilege.

How that conversation doesn't end with the car swerving into the divider, I'll never know.

we were in bed drinking the morning coffee =D. I drove us to the airport 5 min later, then she drove to work and I went home =(.

That makes me smile so very very much. I love the random conversations that happen while snuggling.

My husband and I had a long conversation a few nights ago before we went to sleep about how if corporations are people too (my friend), then can they get married? And if so, how can we be sure of gender so they don't (gasp) get gay married?  And at what point is a subsidiary considered alive? Yeah, we're dorks.


Yeah, conversations like this are really fun. Also, I consider her to be smarter than me, which absolutely means the world to me. I've had roommates and neighbors before that ranged from not so sharp to honest to god dumb. Those conversations are either very restricted on what topics we can talk about and how much depth we caI had  n continue on with and sometimes it was very lonely... I had no one to really talk to. With her we can really talk about anything, work excepted because it requires such specific knowledge that isn't easy to abstract to discuss. She makes me think and listens and I make her think and listen the best I can, just often having things repeated because of my hearing. It just means so much to me that we can talk like that and that she contribute and understands and we compliment each other so well.

Just as importantly, we can sit there and say nothing and it never becomes uncomfortable. I had a roommate for a while that couldn't stand silence, it was almost bizarre but something had to be on: radio, tv, movie in the background, or HAD to be talking. For some reason silence wasn't okay, and I really appreciated with her and I we can have silence.
 
2013-03-03 02:30:12 PM

nucal: notatrollorami: Johnsnownw: My wife is a huge pain in the ass, and I love the hell out of her. That's the way it should be.

/Guy must have a boring sex life.


Hate to do it, but "this".  My wife of 15 years is cray cray and an unpredictable uncontrollable pain in the ass.  Guess what?  I have my own shortcomings she lives with too.  I wouldn't have it any other way.

///Plenty of sex.

////Helps that we both try to keep it together exercise wise and look pretty good for oldsters.

Out of curiosity - kids or no kids?


Two, 8 and 12.  Why do you ask?
 
2013-03-03 02:31:14 PM

Trillian Astra: I also attempted to listen to one of his stand-up shows and he sounds like a cross between Dane Cook and someone else equally as unfunny.


I agree that Dane Cook is an excellent point of comparison for "not funny." But in Dane Cook's defense (shudder) he's head and shoulders above anyone I've ever heard him explicitly compared with, this guy most definitely included.

There's a huge difference between setting the bar an inch above the ground and clearing it by a millimeter, which is what the Dane Cooks and  Two Broke Girlses of the comedy world do, and "comedians" who fundamentally misunderstand the nature of comedy. Crowder's kind of schtick is like watching someone who thinks they speak fluent Spanish because they memorized every word in a pocket dictionary. ("Hello! I be to have your morning-good! For your favor, my chestnuts is toasty this daybreak!" Actually, strike that analogy, because that sounds like it could be pretty funny.)

Damn, when I got up this morning I didn't think I'd be white-knighting Dane Cook. I need to go watch the last twenty minutes of  Mr. Brooks to cleanse the palate.
 
2013-03-03 02:35:23 PM
I've been checking out his articles. The article titles are pretty funny...but c'mon. This one, it sounds exactly like my redneck grampa when my uncle has him cornered and he's tired of arguing.

"Say what you want about George W. Bush, but the guy is a man's man. He means what he says, and he says what he means. Whether you agree with the Texan or not, at least one always knows where they stand with him."

This guy is not for real, is he??
 
2013-03-03 02:36:00 PM
My wife always comes home from girls night out horny. I always figure it's because they all complain about their husbands, and I'm the least bad.

/at least that's what I tell myself
 
2013-03-03 02:37:16 PM

notatrollorami: OK now I'm starting to think you're trolling.  She doesn't have to take your name, of course that's reasonable, but you're going to take hers?  Just go ahead and slice of your nads and hang them on a chain around her neck rather than be weakly metaphorical about it.


Yup. I seriously am.
Like I mentioned, it's something important to me because of the symbolism. It's also worth noting that for a very long time now... 20+ years, we have firmly believed in men and women, boys and girls being equal. There are some different dangly bits but that's about it. I just want our family to have the same last name, but which way it goes doesn't matter to me. And because of all the licensing she has and I don't it just makes more sense.

Why do you think it's any different that a girl taking a guys name, just opposite?
 
2013-03-03 02:38:33 PM
I complain about the soon to be Mrs Crazy when I'm hanging out with the guys. And the reason I do it is that she's not perfect. We've been dating for 3 years, living together for 2, and engaged for half a year, and I love her more every day. But still, she has some traits that annoy me. When I'm with her, I'm too busy staring at her like a love-struck puppy to notice, but when she's not there I can think enough to be bothered by those annoying traits. Also, I can't wait to be back with her to be annoyed some more.

I am capable of loving someone I see as a person instead of an ideal. So stick that in your pipe and smoke it, Stevie.
 
2013-03-03 02:38:41 PM

spentshells: Fat Mike is also a douche
And show pony but that's a good tune about a dirty white boy that can't admit he's part of the problem


So she was right? Or at least more right than I was?
Can you elaborate a little please so that I can understand better? thanks a ton.

\I plan to pass along everything I learn to her.
 
2013-03-03 02:39:59 PM

notatrollorami: nucal: notatrollorami: Johnsnownw: My wife is a huge pain in the ass, and I love the hell out of her. That's the way it should be.

/Guy must have a boring sex life.


Hate to do it, but "this".  My wife of 15 years is cray cray and an unpredictable uncontrollable pain in the ass.  Guess what?  I have my own shortcomings she lives with too.  I wouldn't have it any other way.

///Plenty of sex.

////Helps that we both try to keep it together exercise wise and look pretty good for oldsters.

Out of curiosity - kids or no kids?

Two, 8 and 12.  Why do you ask?


Just trying to figure out if lack of kids helped you keep it together.  Certainly changes the couple dynamic, that's for sure.
 
2013-03-03 02:40:13 PM

thamike: Wendy's Chili: What's this guy's fixation with other guys doing squats?


Those would look a lot less ridiculous without that stupid hat. Or that face.
 
2013-03-03 02:41:55 PM

El Dudereno: thamike: Wendy's Chili: What's this guy's fixation with other guys doing squats?

Those would look a lot less ridiculous without that stupid hat. Or that face.


I'm still wondering how many photographers Time had to go through before they found one who wouldn't burst into crippling peals of laughter.
 
2013-03-03 02:43:15 PM

NewportBarGuy: A man-child who says he needs a woman to be a better man.

Yeah... There ya go. Good luck with that, kiddo.

I love how he speaks with all-encompassing knowledge on every topic he deigns to enlighten us about.

You're a douchebag. Just own it.


Why is he a 'douche bag'?
 
2013-03-03 02:46:24 PM

AlwaysRightBoy: Uchiha_Cycliste: NewportBarGuy: A man-child who says he needs a woman to be a better man.

There are some cases where this is true.
For instance the deal I have going with my girlfriend. Though we've only been dating since July, we've been best friends forever. And for at least the last ten years we have had a deal worked out where if she tells me to do something I do it, and if she tells me not to do something I don't. No arguing, no discussion.
When she says you need to go to the hospital right now, I skedaddle to the closest hospital. When she says, no! you can't climb on that! I don't. I seem to lack that little voice that says 'hey, maybe that's not a good idea' so she provides it for me =D

\been best friends for almost 25 years (since we were 6)
\\been pretty deeply in love for at least a couple of years before we started dating. ♥

Good for you, and much happiness.
/been married to my best friend for 23 years... Dated her for 9 years before that


That's so awesome.
This is my third serious relationship and her first. I think there is really something extra special about us already having been best friends and already knowing everything there is to know about the other. There's none of the time spent worrying about comparability or what kind of a person this one really is, or what their childhood was like. Not to mention there is no stress about meeting the parents, since they already know me pretty well. Hell, technically our first date was the brunch the morning after my little sister's wedding, and we sat with my parents =/.
that's right, I was damn near 30 and the first date with the woman I love and plan to marry was also with my parents =(. though it was a little bit of fun because they weren't privy to our status change yet.
 
2013-03-03 02:47:54 PM
I have a great marriage.  It's been a long one.  We recently celebrated our third anniversary.  I had to find a clever way to ask my parents what day I got married because I honestly couldn't remember.  I've only told my wife once that I love her.  She tells me quite often.  I respond with "I know" and "As well you should."  I do have a nickname for her.  Sometime's it's 'Kitchen biatch'.  She's short, so my other nickname for her is 'Person McNugget'.  Now I will admit, that second one is a rather new one.

I have improved her life and made her a better person.  She used to watch sports.  I have pointed out what a waste of time that was and shown her 'Star Trek'.  Now she knows all the Star Trek captains and the difference between a Galaxy Class starship and a Miranda class starship.  She has improved so much that she missed the superbowl this year.  As the person who's been improving her life, I felt proud of this.

It's really a great marriage, one to be envied...
 
2013-03-03 02:50:31 PM

Donkey Hodie: In a couple of months I will celebrate my 20th wedding anniversary with my wife.  We still love each other, and get along great.  But the author hasn't lived long enough or had enough experience in the world if he thinks a spouse, even a loving, kind, funny, happy, cool, sexy one, will not ever be a pain in the ass.  I try not to disparage my wife in front of others, but he's in a fantasy land if he thinks a good marriage never has any arguments or times when one or both partners are not perfect.  Sometimes my wife has been a pain in my ass.  Sometimes I've been a pain her hers.  A good marriage is not one that never experiences difficulties, but one in which both partners work through them together when they do occur.


Basically, this. My husband and I will be married 32 years on April 1st, and we've been exclusively a couple for 37 years at the end of May (we had to wait five years until we were old enough to get married and take care of ourselves).

We've been pains in each other's asses on many occasions over the years, but the thing is, we *still* have never disparaged each other to our friends or co-workers or anyone else. We have disagreements, but we don't say to a friend "God, what a biatch my wife is sometimes!" or "He's such a prick when he gets on his high horse" or whatever.

I think the point about not running down your spouse to other people is a very good one. The more you think and say such things about someone you ostensibly love the easier it is to see them as a "biatch" or "prick".

This guy's a jerk, but that point stands, and that's coming from someone with a lot more "married years" under her belt.
 
2013-03-03 02:50:46 PM
Great Janitor: I have a great marriage.  It's been a long one.  We recently celebrated our third anniversary.  I had to find a clever way to ask my parents what day I got married because I honestly couldn't remember.  I've only told my wife once that I love her.  She tells me quite often.  I respond with "I know" and "As well you should."  I do have a nickname for her.  Sometime's it's 'Kitchen biatch'.  She's short, so my other nickname for her is 'Person McNugget'.  Now I will admit, that second one is a rather new one.

I have improved her life and made her a better person.  She used to watch sports.  I have pointed out what a waste of time that was and shown her 'Star Trek'.  Now she knows all the Star Trek captains and the difference between a Galaxy Class starship and a Miranda class starship.  She has improved so much that she missed the superbowl this year.  As the person who's been improving her life, I felt proud of this.

It's really a great marriage, one to be envied...

Keep reaching for the spentMiles "achievement unlocked" you've got some work to do but you'll get there.
 
2013-03-03 02:51:35 PM
He may be a douche in the way he presents his point, but he does have one. I married a dud the first time around. By the end I really hated the guy. When I got divorced I promised myself I wouldn't stay in a relationship with someone who wasn't right for me. The big sign that I am not doing that now is that I really don't have anything to complain about. My fiancée is a wonderful fit for me. I wouldn't be marrying him if I thought he was a pain in the ass. If I spent most of my time talking badly about him the relationship would be over. He isn't perfect, and neither am I, but we are perfect for eachother. After 2 years of being together, and 17 years of knowing eachother we are still really happy. I spent many years complaining about someone who was wrong for me, and have watched a few friends do the same. Now I could go on and on about how great my so is. I don't though. Who the hell wants to sit and listen to that either?
 
2013-03-03 02:53:31 PM

El Dudereno: My wife always comes home from girls night out horny. I always figure it's because they all complain about their husbands, and I'm the least bad.

/at least that's what I tell myself


Thats cause she let the cute guy at the bar fingerbang her in the parking lot to get her ready for you.
 
2013-03-03 02:56:37 PM

Uchiha_Cycliste: notatrollorami: OK now I'm starting to think you're trolling.  She doesn't have to take your name, of course that's reasonable, but you're going to take hers?  Just go ahead and slice of your nads and hang them on a chain around her neck rather than be weakly metaphorical about it.

Yup. I seriously am.
Like I mentioned, it's something important to me because of the symbolism. It's also worth noting that for a very long time now... 20+ years, we have firmly believed in men and women, boys and girls being equal. There are some different dangly bits but that's about it. I just want our family to have the same last name, but which way it goes doesn't matter to me. And because of all the licensing she has and I don't it just makes more sense.

Why do you think it's any different that a girl taking a guys name, just opposite?



I don't think it is fundamentally different for either gender.  The reality, though, is that you are buying a lifetimes worth of perception problems when dealing with other people.

I was a stay at home dad for a few years, which was absolutely wonderful.  I loved all the time just being a dad; it just suits me.  She on the other hand is fond of the corporate rat race while I hate it and taking a few years off when the kids were small gave me the opportunity to restart with a contracting career I enjoy.  So it was best for US.  But I was astonished at how much it changed the perception of me and us from the outside, including long time friends.

It doesn't matter if it should be that way or not, this is the society we live in and it's draining to run counter to it.  For that situation and for my wife and I and that was the right decision to make, but there were real social repercussions far beyond what I anticipated.  I wouldn't deal with that for a name, personally,  But you're you and I'm not.
 
2013-03-03 02:56:42 PM

5monkeys: He may be a douche in the way he presents his point, but he does have one. I married a dud the first time around. By the end I really hated the guy. When I got divorced I promised myself I wouldn't stay in a relationship with someone who wasn't right for me. The big sign that I am not doing that now is that I really don't have anything to complain about. My fiancée is a wonderful fit for me. I wouldn't be marrying him if I thought he was a pain in the ass. If I spent most of my time talking badly about him the relationship would be over. He isn't perfect, and neither am I, but we are perfect for eachother. After 2 years of being together, and 17 years of knowing eachother we are still really happy. I spent many years complaining about someone who was wrong for me, and have watched a few friends do the same. Now I could go on and on about how great my so is. I don't though. Who the hell wants to sit and listen to that either?


Congrats! I wish you a long happy life and marriage and all that jazz. ♥
 
2013-03-03 02:59:59 PM

5monkeys: I could go on and on about how great my so is. I don't though. Who the hell wants to sit and listen to that either?


I'll make you a deal. You listen to me talk about how amazing my fiancee is, and I'll listen to you. I'll even nod at all the right times!

I think a lot of my friends are sick of it. Not that I plan to stop - when you've got a woman as great as her, it's hard not to brag.
 
2013-03-03 03:01:12 PM
FTFA: Imagine actually thinking that I married somebody better than myself.

Actually as a happily married man who has been married since 2001 and has two young daughters, I can very easily imagine you married somebody better than you. I don't find that hard to believe at all. I also don't find it hard to believe you are pedestal-izing her.
 
2013-03-03 03:03:33 PM
"The gentlemen had certainly never heard, nor ever expected to hear, a response like that from "one of the guys" for as long as he'd live."

This statement is unbelievably naive, presumptuous, pompous, and grammatically incorrect. Fox News delivers.
 
2013-03-03 03:04:41 PM

silvervial: I think the point about not running down your spouse to other people is a very good one. The more you think and say such things about someone you ostensibly love the easier it is to see them as a "biatch" or "prick".


The point is a good one. I don't say anything about my wife to anyone that I wouldn't say to her face. But the fact the author thinks this is some sort of revelation and is bragging on the internet doesn't make him any less of a douche. A asshole weatherman might be right when he says the sun is coming up tomorrow, but that doesn't make him any less of an asshole.
 
2013-03-03 03:07:40 PM

El Dudereno: My wife always comes home from girls night out horny. I always figure it's because they all complain about their husbands, and I'm the least bad.


I have my own theories, but don't let me interrupt. I guess what I'm saying is.....go on...
 
2013-03-03 03:08:14 PM

notatrollorami: Uchiha_Cycliste: notatrollorami: OK now I'm starting to think you're trolling.  She doesn't have to take your name, of course that's reasonable, but you're going to take hers?  Just go ahead and slice of your nads and hang them on a chain around her neck rather than be weakly metaphorical about it.

Yup. I seriously am.
Like I mentioned, it's something important to me because of the symbolism. It's also worth noting that for a very long time now... 20+ years, we have firmly believed in men and women, boys and girls being equal. There are some different dangly bits but that's about it. I just want our family to have the same last name, but which way it goes doesn't matter to me. And because of all the licensing she has and I don't it just makes more sense.

Why do you think it's any different that a girl taking a guys name, just opposite?


I don't think it is fundamentally different for either gender.  The reality, though, is that you are buying a lifetimes worth of perception problems when dealing with other people.

I was a stay at home dad for a few years, which was absolutely wonderful.  I loved all the time just being a dad; it just suits me.  She on the other hand is fond of the corporate rat race while I hate it and taking a few years off when the kids were small gave me the opportunity to restart with a contracting career I enjoy.  So it was best for US.  But I was astonished at how much it changed the perception of me and us from the outside, including long time friends.

It doesn't matter if it should be that way or not, this is the society we live in and it's draining to run counter to it.  For that situation and for my wife and I and that was the right decision to make, but there were real social repercussions far beyond what I anticipated.  I wouldn't deal with that for a name, personally,  But you're you and I'm not.


I hadn't even begun to consider something like that. I suppose part of me can't imagine it being a problem. However, I will default to the fact you almost certainly have more life experience than me and it's something that I should take into account and steel myself against. My thoughts were that I know my friends understand me and will totally get what I'm doing. I assume that my coworkers wwon't care much because we are all excessively pedantic as engineers and all I have to do is explain to those who ask or care and it should be cool.
My mom thinks my dad will blow a gasket, but fark 'm. I'm still me and if he takes issue to this I think that would be just absurd.
 
2013-03-03 03:13:11 PM
Poor, poor Steven Crowder. Not only is he delusional, but he is an idiot. I have known those types since middle school. The ones that would have their mom dye their jocks the team color, the ones that swore abstinence until marriage, the ones who belonged to Fellowship of Christian Athletes, the ones that dated the prudish straight A girl with her hair in a bun and sweater covering her tits in July. So now Steve married the girl of his dreams and absolutely adores her because he got his first piece of pie in his life. Maybe it was her first, too, but since she got a little feel for it and quickly figured out he had no idea how to use his tool, she will find somebody that does. I am 99.998% positive Mrs. Crowder is going to pulling the Reading RR in no time and those guys in the locker will not be able to look at him without laughing.

(Smoked with the cool kids)
 
2013-03-03 03:14:46 PM

Uchiha_Cycliste: Yup. I seriously am.
Like I mentioned, it's something important to me because of the symbolism. It's also worth noting that for a very long time now... 20+ years, we have firmly believed in men and women, boys and girls being equal. There are some different dangly bits but that's about it. I just want our family to have the same last name, but which way it goes doesn't matter to me. And because of all the licensing she has and I don't it just makes more sense.


if it wasn't such a pain in the arse i'd take my GFs name. her name is easy to spell and pronounce and my name is a Frankenstein born out of ellis island. but its a not easy to do and costs a lot for a man, so i'll just keep my poorly pronounced and oddly spelled moniker
 
2013-03-03 03:16:47 PM

wagnerism: For those of you that want to know what it's like to be in a serious relationship with a woman - I just found out that I'm on the third day of an argument that I didn't know I was having.


A girlfriend was once shiatty with me for three days because I was mean to her in a dream.
 
2013-03-03 03:17:25 PM

tlchwi02: Uchiha_Cycliste: Yup. I seriously am.
Like I mentioned, it's something important to me because of the symbolism. It's also worth noting that for a very long time now... 20+ years, we have firmly believed in men and women, boys and girls being equal. There are some different dangly bits but that's about it. I just want our family to have the same last name, but which way it goes doesn't matter to me. And because of all the licensing she has and I don't it just makes more sense.

if it wasn't such a pain in the arse i'd take my GFs name. her name is easy to spell and pronounce and my name is a Frankenstein born out of ellis island. but its a not easy to do and costs a lot for a man, so i'll just keep my poorly pronounced and oddly spelled moniker


really?
Can you elaborate please? I'm really curious and interested.
 
2013-03-03 03:18:11 PM

bratface: NewportBarGuy: A man-child who says he needs a woman to be a better man.

Yeah... There ya go. Good luck with that, kiddo.

I love how he speaks with all-encompassing knowledge on every topic he deigns to enlighten us about.

You're a douchebag. Just own it.

Why is he a 'douche bag'?


I think that's been studied exhaustively in this thread.
 
2013-03-03 03:18:39 PM

Wyalt Derp: wagnerism: For those of you that want to know what it's like to be in a serious relationship with a woman - I just found out that I'm on the third day of an argument that I didn't know I was having.

A girlfriend was once shiatty with me for three days because I was mean to her in a dream.


did she also believe in astrology?
 
2013-03-03 03:19:21 PM

Wyalt Derp: A girlfriend was once shiatty with me for three days because I was mean to her in a dream.


She did you a favor by giving you three reasons why she's not wife material.
 
2013-03-03 03:23:48 PM

silvervial: Donkey Hodie: In a couple of months I will celebrate my 20th wedding anniversary with my wife.  We still love each other, and get along great.  But the author hasn't lived long enough or had enough experience in the world if he thinks a spouse, even a loving, kind, funny, happy, cool, sexy one, will not ever be a pain in the ass.  I try not to disparage my wife in front of others, but he's in a fantasy land if he thinks a good marriage never has any arguments or times when one or both partners are not perfect.  Sometimes my wife has been a pain in my ass.  Sometimes I've been a pain her hers.  A good marriage is not one that never experiences difficulties, but one in which both partners work through them together when they do occur.

Basically, this. My husband and I will be married 32 years on April 1st, and we've been exclusively a couple for 37 years at the end of May (we had to wait five years until we were old enough to get married and take care of ourselves).

We've been pains in each other's asses on many occasions over the years, but the thing is, we *still* have never disparaged each other to our friends or co-workers or anyone else. We have disagreements, but we don't say to a friend "God, what a biatch my wife is sometimes!" or "He's such a prick when he gets on his high horse" or whatever.

I think the point about not running down your spouse to other people is a very good one. The more you think and say such things about someone you ostensibly love the easier it is to see them as a "biatch" or "prick".

This guy's a jerk, but that point stands, and that's coming from someone with a lot more "married years" under her belt.


I think these two post have more good information than entire FA.  Ms. Gough and I will celebrate our 41st anniversary this summer.  We've followed Paul Newman's advice:  "we try to fix the toaster instead of throwing it away, and when Joanne and I get in trouble we try to fix it "
 
2013-03-03 03:25:39 PM

Gough: Ms. Gough and I will celebrate our 41st anniversary this summer.


Holy crap! You're my hero
 
2013-03-03 03:26:48 PM

Uchiha_Cycliste: really?
Can you elaborate please? I'm really curious and interested.


technically its supposed to be the same as a woman taking a mans name, and on paper it should be as simple. the problem is that because its still very unusual it seems (anecdotally) like there are a lot more problems where government and banks and other institutions put you through the ringer. maybe its just because the anecdotes are currently popular to print and 99% of people don't have a problem, but my name isn't so terrible that I want to take the risk
 
2013-03-03 03:27:53 PM

thamike: bratface: NewportBarGuy: A man-child who says he needs a woman to be a better man.

Yeah... There ya go. Good luck with that, kiddo.

I love how he speaks with all-encompassing knowledge on every topic he deigns to enlighten us about.

You're a douchebag. Just own it.

Why is he a 'douche bag'?

I think that's been studied exhaustively in this thread.


I think his use of the phrase "urinate-and-moan" really sums it up nicely. What kind of worthless prick needs that vulgar phrase so badly that they must use it, but can't bring themselves to use it honestly?
 
2013-03-03 03:33:12 PM

supayoda: FloydA: I never had a bad thing to say about any of my exes for the first six months we were together either.

That was my first thought. "Go ahead, idiot, and shine your newlywed wisdom all over the men who have 20-30 years in and be sure to share the secrets of how you've lasted this long." Even before my husband and I were married, I could tell you that our relationship wasn't perfect. No relationship is. And me venting or joking to my girlfriends (or him to his guy friends) is a perfectly normal and healthy way of getting that out. It has abso-farking-lutely nothing to do with peer pressure.

But yeah... I guess if my husband and I held it all in and then let it occasionally explode in some glorious screaming match every few days, we'd have a much better marriage. Personally, I prefer not having to sneak around my house to avoid the other people living in it. Having a husband who's more interested ripping off my yoga pants than griping about how I burned dinner doesn't hurt, either.

So I'll conclude... Either he's lying about how perfect things are, he's delusional, or this thing has maybe another year or two before it ends with one of them banging the neighbor and/or a murder/suicide.

/Married 10 years in May.


Why is your husband wearing your yoga pants in the first place?  Doesn't he have his own?  (Sorry, but I couldn't resist.  Congrats on having a good marriage, I'm still waiting for Faith Hill to dump Tim McGraw.)
 
2013-03-03 03:34:12 PM

thurstonxhowell: I think his use of the phrase "urinate-and-moan" really sums it up nicely. What kind of worthless prick needs that vulgar phrase so badly that they must use it, but can't bring themselves to use it honestly?


i47.tinypic.com

"I'm a raving douchebag!"
 
2013-03-03 03:35:24 PM

eddiesocket: Why are people mad at this guy? Because he won't talk crap about his wife to strangers at the gym?  What a  monster.
Yeah sure, he probably won't feel quite this schoompy once he's been married longer, but the general idea--don't hate your spouse, don't talk shiat about them in public--is a pretty sound one, I think.


Because most them are a bunch of no-hope losers who screwed up their own marriages...?
 
2013-03-03 03:35:56 PM

Uchiha_Cycliste: really?
Can you elaborate please? I'm really curious and interested.


oh and I don't want my poor GF to have my name. her name starts with "ch" and my last name also does. it would sound weird.
 
2013-03-03 03:37:31 PM

tlchwi02: Uchiha_Cycliste: really?
Can you elaborate please? I'm really curious and interested.

technically its supposed to be the same as a woman taking a mans name, and on paper it should be as simple. the problem is that because its still very unusual it seems (anecdotally) like there are a lot more problems where government and banks and other institutions put you through the ringer. maybe its just because the anecdotes are currently popular to print and 99% of people don't have a problem, but my name isn't so terrible that I want to take the risk


that's really interesting.
It sounds like maybe things are partially automated for a woman that goes through this process, but not men? Hmm, if... *IF* gay marriage were to become legal across the nation I bet it would become significantly easier to do. But I don't think that will be happening soon =/
The way I think, both she and I would have a handful of stuff we have to do, but she has licenses and other medical stuff in addition. I can't help think that it would be a huger hassle for her, which makes me sad.
 
2013-03-03 03:39:03 PM

I should be in the kitchen: If your spouse is such a horrible person, what does that say about you for marrying her/him, hmmm? I think it's natural to want to vent on occasion but if all you have to say is negative, you're a piece of shiat.


This.

I don't think the author is complaining about men who on occasion have a grumble about their wives, but rather the ball slapped men who must put down their wives just because it seems to be the thing to do.

Ball slapped, by the way,  is very similar to pussy whipped but rather than meekly just doing what their girlfriends want,  these men do anything their male mates want even though they do not want to.
 
2013-03-03 03:40:31 PM

tlchwi02: Uchiha_Cycliste: really?
Can you elaborate please? I'm really curious and interested.

oh and I don't want my poor GF to have my name. her name starts with "ch" and my last name also does. it would sound weird.


Like Chris Christie?  It worked for him.
 
2013-03-03 03:41:48 PM
That guy is a comedian? Does he do stand-up where he gets on stage and talks down to the audience and dispenses advice that he's woefully unqualified to give? Sounds hilarious.
 
2013-03-03 03:42:49 PM

Gough: silvervial: Donkey Hodie: In a couple of months I will celebrate my 20th wedding anniversary with my wife.  We still love each other, and get along great.  But the author hasn't lived long enough or had enough experience in the world if he thinks a spouse, even a loving, kind, funny, happy, cool, sexy one, will not ever be a pain in the ass.  I try not to disparage my wife in front of others, but he's in a fantasy land if he thinks a good marriage never has any arguments or times when one or both partners are not perfect.  Sometimes my wife has been a pain in my ass.  Sometimes I've been a pain her hers.  A good marriage is not one that never experiences difficulties, but one in which both partners work through them together when they do occur.

Basically, this. My husband and I will be married 32 years on April 1st, and we've been exclusively a couple for 37 years at the end of May (we had to wait five years until we were old enough to get married and take care of ourselves).

We've been pains in each other's asses on many occasions over the years, but the thing is, we *still* have never disparaged each other to our friends or co-workers or anyone else. We have disagreements, but we don't say to a friend "God, what a biatch my wife is sometimes!" or "He's such a prick when he gets on his high horse" or whatever.

I think the point about not running down your spouse to other people is a very good one. The more you think and say such things about someone you ostensibly love the easier it is to see them as a "biatch" or "prick".

This guy's a jerk, but that point stands, and that's coming from someone with a lot more "married years" under her belt.

I think these two post have more good information than entire FA.  Ms. Gough and I will celebrate our 41st anniversary this summer.  We've followed Paul Newman's advice:  "we try to fix the toaster instead of throwing it away, and when Joanne and I get in trouble we try to fix it "



...and never go to bed, work or where ever angry.

Total of 32 years married. (Married young...widowed...married again and I am a very lucky man).  I would never talk ill of my wife to others.

/congratulations on your 41st.  That needs to happen more often in marriages.
 
2013-03-03 03:44:01 PM
Who says you have to be married to be "happy"?
 
2013-03-03 03:49:15 PM

lack of warmth: Like Chris Christie? It worked for him.


yeah except my last name is of polish extract, has about 20 letters and is pronounced phonetically. if we went back to the original pronunciation it wouldn't be so bad (supposed to sound like a "sh") I've been sort of flirting with going back to the original pronunciation but never really gotten serious about it

Uchiha_Cycliste: that's really interesting.
It sounds like maybe things are partially automated for a woman that goes through this process, but not men? Hmm, if... *IF* gay marriage were to become legal across the nation I bet it would become significantly easier to do. But I don't think that will be happening soon =/
The way I think, both she and I would have a handful of stuff we have to do, but she has licenses and other medical stuff in addition. I can't help think that it would be a huger hassle for her, which makes me sad.


the issues I've seen tend to be banks or local government thinking your name change is due to some sort of "scam" or something of the sort. its really just because of the cultural prejudice we have against men doing it. I figure what we'll end up doing is she'll take my name, even though I'd prefer she just keep hers (and we could decide on the kids later, or even let them decide when they're old enough.) she is a bit traditional in that respect (although she's lobbying if we use my name that we start pronouncing it correctly)
 
2013-03-03 03:49:56 PM

Uchiha_Cycliste: notatrollorami: Uchiha_Cycliste: notatrollorami: OK now I'm starting to think you're trolling.  She doesn't have to take your name, of course that's reasonable, but you're going to take hers?  Just go ahead and slice of your nads and hang them on a chain around her neck rather than be weakly metaphorical about it.

Yup. I seriously am.
Like I mentioned, it's something important to me because of the symbolism. It's also worth noting that for a very long time now... 20+ years, we have firmly believed in men and women, boys and girls being equal. There are some different dangly bits but that's about it. I just want our family to have the same last name, but which way it goes doesn't matter to me. And because of all the licensing she has and I don't it just makes more sense.

Why do you think it's any different that a girl taking a guys name, just opposite?


I don't think it is fundamentally different for either gender.  The reality, though, is that you are buying a lifetimes worth of perception problems when dealing with other people.

I was a stay at home dad for a few years, which was absolutely wonderful.  I loved all the time just being a dad; it just suits me.  She on the other hand is fond of the corporate rat race while I hate it and taking a few years off when the kids were small gave me the opportunity to restart with a contracting career I enjoy.  So it was best for US.  But I was astonished at how much it changed the perception of me and us from the outside, including long time friends.

It doesn't matter if it should be that way or not, this is the society we live in and it's draining to run counter to it.  For that situation and for my wife and I and that was the right decision to make, but there were real social repercussions far beyond what I anticipated.  I wouldn't deal with that for a name, personally,  But you're you and I'm not.

I hadn't even begun to consider something like that. I suppose part of me can't imagine it being a problem. However, I w ...


Your assumption that your coworkers (and presumably by extension your neighbors, acquaintances, and UPS guy) will not care is regrettably false.  That's what I failed to anticipate.  Because the decision you're considering is atypical it will become your defining attribute.  There's the one armed guy, the cat lady, the midget, the guy with the mullet.  You will be the "guy who took his wifes name".  And the inevitable underpinnings of the conversation that will occur thousands of times as soon as you walk away will be about whether this indicates you are perhaps a nice and considerate husband or a shrinking violet whose wife wears the pants or if you were actively working to end your family name.  Which, BTW, will be the real reason your dad will be upset whether he can effectively communicate it or not.  It will be something he either tries to hide or ignore or the subject of shame and speculation among his peer group.  It's just the nature of going against the grain.

I'm not trying to convince you to change your mind.  At all.  I'm just saying you owe it to yourself and your soon to be wife to really think/talk through the reality of the situation rather than blithely dismissing the repercussions of such a decision.  And if you do take her name be especially wary of gradually developing over-machismo attributes to counteract the inevitable perception of emasculation you will encounter.

Best of luck though man.  Marriage (propertly fed and watered) can make your life better and more meaningful than anything you can possible experience as an individual.

//If your dad is a good guy try to be gentle breaking the news.  Whether justified or not on the basis of names meaning anything, he'll probably take it a lot better if you can make him believe and understand you're not doing it to slight the family name.
 
2013-03-03 03:51:45 PM
Yeah, this guy's been married all of seven months. As much as I think in general he has a good point (some guys are pretty relentless about badmouthing the wife), he hasn't even gotten to the hard part yet and he's criticizing guys who have been in the hard part for 5, 10, 20 years. Seven months, fer reals?! He might as well call from his honeymoon while catching his breath between farks and tell all guys they're jerks for badmouthing their wives or marriage. Total dick move.

And notice he conveniently left this tidbit out of his column. He didn't bring it up in the interview either, the anchor had to ask him.
 
2013-03-03 03:57:07 PM

notatrollorami: /If your dad is a good guy try to be gentle breaking the news.  Whether justified or not on the basis of names meaning anything, he'll probably take it a lot better if you can make him believe and understand you're not doing it to slight the family name.


in a lot of ways, my dad isn't a good guy =/

\I plan to respond to the rest, but I'm so close to FINALLY finishing peeling all these almonds so I'm gonna finish that then come back to here =F

\\frigging pound of almonds.
 
2013-03-03 04:00:57 PM

Uchiha_Cycliste: tlchwi02: Uchiha_Cycliste: really?
Can you elaborate please? I'm really curious and interested.

technically its supposed to be the same as a woman taking a mans name, and on paper it should be as simple. the problem is that because its still very unusual it seems (anecdotally) like there are a lot more problems where government and banks and other institutions put you through the ringer. maybe its just because the anecdotes are currently popular to print and 99% of people don't have a problem, but my name isn't so terrible that I want to take the risk

that's really interesting.
It sounds like maybe things are partially automated for a woman that goes through this process, but not men? Hmm, if... *IF* gay marriage were to become legal across the nation I bet it would become significantly easier to do. But I don't think that will be happening soon =/
The way I think, both she and I would have a handful of stuff we have to do, but she has licenses and other medical stuff in addition. I can't help think that it would be a huger hassle for her, which makes me sad.



I believe in some states they allow the couple to create a new last name that both take
 
2013-03-03 04:03:15 PM

hutchkc: Uchiha_Cycliste: tlchwi02: Uchiha_Cycliste: really?
Can you elaborate please? I'm really curious and interested.

technically its supposed to be the same as a woman taking a mans name, and on paper it should be as simple. the problem is that because its still very unusual it seems (anecdotally) like there are a lot more problems where government and banks and other institutions put you through the ringer. maybe its just because the anecdotes are currently popular to print and 99% of people don't have a problem, but my name isn't so terrible that I want to take the risk

that's really interesting.
It sounds like maybe things are partially automated for a woman that goes through this process, but not men? Hmm, if... *IF* gay marriage were to become legal across the nation I bet it would become significantly easier to do. But I don't think that will be happening soon =/
The way I think, both she and I would have a handful of stuff we have to do, but she has licenses and other medical stuff in addition. I can't help think that it would be a huger hassle for her, which makes me sad.

I believe in some states they allow the couple to create a new last name that both take


I would think if any state was gonna do that, it would be mine (CA)
 
2013-03-03 04:03:56 PM

Uchiha_Cycliste: 5monkeys: He may be a douche in the way he presents his point, but he does have one. I married a dud the first time around. By the end I really hated the guy. When I got divorced I promised myself I wouldn't stay in a relationship with someone who wasn't right for me. The big sign that I am not doing that now is that I really don't have anything to complain about. My fiancée is a wonderful fit for me. I wouldn't be marrying him if I thought he was a pain in the ass. If I spent most of my time talking badly about him the relationship would be over. He isn't perfect, and neither am I, but we are perfect for eachother. After 2 years of being together, and 17 years of knowing eachother we are still really happy. I spent many years complaining about someone who was wrong for me, and have watched a few friends do the same. Now I could go on and on about how great my so is. I don't though. Who the hell wants to sit and listen to that either?

Congrats! I wish you a long happy life and marriage and all that jazz. ♥


Thanks!
 
2013-03-03 04:09:57 PM

I May Be Crazy But...: 5monkeys: I could go on and on about how great my so is. I don't though. Who the hell wants to sit and listen to that either?

I'll make you a deal. You listen to me talk about how amazing my fiancee is, and I'll listen to you. I'll even nod at all the right times!

I think a lot of my friends are sick of it. Not that I plan to stop - when you've got a woman as great as her, it's hard not to brag.


Deal! I feel like a jerk saying anything when most of the people I know sound like they want to hire a hit man, or are forever alones. I just try to listen and be supportive.
 
2013-03-03 04:11:18 PM

thurstonxhowell: I think his use of the phrase "urinate-and-moan" really sums it up nicely. What kind of worthless prick needs that vulgar phrase so badly that they must use it, but can't bring themselves to use it honestly?


Worthless pricks who were raised by this:

download.lardlad.com

/HIS BLADDER'S FULL!  FULL OF URINE!
 
2013-03-03 04:15:24 PM

frankmigacz: He just got his first "Married Filing Jointly" tax refund. $5 that Wifey will be sick of his shiat first.


The article is satire for sure, but the big change that comes with checking a different box on your 1040 isn't.
 
2013-03-03 04:23:49 PM
Even when I was married to a person that drove me crazy and depressed me completely, I didn't talk shiat about her if I could avoid it.

And now that I'm with my best friend-- someone I've loved since 1988-- I would never speak ill of her to others. On the contrary, I want to BRAG about how awesome she is! And we are most certainly not in our honeymoon phase, either. We just know how to communicate with each other, and we have a lot of love and passion for one another, too.

But then, I'm not one of those repressed homosexual, knuckle-dragging types who needs to hang out in a locker room with other half-naked guys and do the whole "guy talk" thing. I think a lot of these guys say misogynistic shiat about their wives because they think it makes them a bro.

If you treat your spouse like an adversary, she'll become one.

I also find it sad that a lot of you guys are saying the guy who WON'T insult his wife is the one who is being cheated on. Actually, it's the other way around. The ones who DO insult their wives end up losing them to a guy who isn't a complete ass, who treats her like she deserves (i.e. not talking shiat about her behind her back), and who actually listens and communicates with her.

And it works both ways, ladies. Talk shiat about your man, and I guarantee he'll get wind of it and eventually decide to be with someone else. And he's right to do so. Just as you would be if he insults you when around his buddies.

If you don't appreciate your spouse, then why be with them? If they aren't the one person who stands by your side and communicates honestly, without penalty, then what the hell are you married for, anyway?

Communicate, have frequent sex, compromise when there's a dispute, and never walk away angry.
 
2013-03-03 04:24:57 PM

WorkingInParadise: Although I am still married to the woman I married, the woman I am married to is not the woman I married...


That is why I soon will no longer be married. You summed it up quite nicely, sir.
 
2013-03-03 04:25:34 PM

p51d007: Who says you have to be married to be "happy"?


Co-dependent people.
 
2013-03-03 04:26:01 PM
I am twice divorced. I had no intention of divorcing either when I married them. I was with one about 11 years, the other about 13 years.

It happens. Guy is so damn naive it is almost cute.
 
2013-03-03 04:31:42 PM
Look, guys. You don't talk bad about your wife to other guys.

You do it on a CBS sitcom.
 
2013-03-03 04:35:29 PM

Uchiha_Cycliste: Great Janitor: I have a great marriage.  It's been a long one.  We recently celebrated our third anniversary.  I had to find a clever way to ask my parents what day I got married because I honestly couldn't remember.  I've only told my wife once that I love her.  She tells me quite often.  I respond with "I know" and "As well you should."  I do have a nickname for her.  Sometime's it's 'Kitchen biatch'.  She's short, so my other nickname for her is 'Person McNugget'.  Now I will admit, that second one is a rather new one.

I have improved her life and made her a better person.  She used to watch sports.  I have pointed out what a waste of time that was and shown her 'Star Trek'.  Now she knows all the Star Trek captains and the difference between a Galaxy Class starship and a Miranda class starship.  She has improved so much that she missed the superbowl this year.  As the person who's been improving her life, I felt proud of this.

It's really a great marriage, one to be envied...

Keep reaching for the spentMiles "achievement unlocked" you've got some work to do but you'll get there.


Janitor put some effort into it but it lacked a little something. I'll offer a 6/10 because I can feel the potential. I was hoping for a line about how her cooking has improved since he threw dinner in the trash until she learned to do better.
/I love Spentmiles.
//happy Uchica is deliriously in love!
 
2013-03-03 04:35:36 PM

Uchiha_Cycliste: NewportBarGuy: A man-child who says he needs a woman to be a better man.

There are some cases where this is true.
For instance the deal I have going with my girlfriend. Though we've only been dating since July, we've been best friends forever. And for at least the last ten years we have had a deal worked out where if she tells me to do something I do it, and if she tells me not to do something I don't. No arguing, no discussion.
When she says you need to go to the hospital right now, I skedaddle to the closest hospital. When she says, no! you can't climb on that! I don't. I seem to lack that little voice that says 'hey, maybe that's not a good idea' so she provides it for me =D

\been best friends for almost 25 years (since we were 6)
\\been pretty deeply in love for at least a couple of years before we started dating. ♥


Congrats on finding the perfect dom

I keed...
 
2013-03-03 04:40:08 PM

Uchiha_Cycliste: hutchkc: Uchiha_Cycliste: tlchwi02: Uchiha_Cycliste: really?
Can you elaborate please? I'm really curious and interested.

technically its supposed to be the same as a woman taking a mans name, and on paper it should be as simple. the problem is that because its still very unusual it seems (anecdotally) like there are a lot more problems where government and banks and other institutions put you through the ringer. maybe its just because the anecdotes are currently popular to print and 99% of people don't have a problem, but my name isn't so terrible that I want to take the risk

that's really interesting.
It sounds like maybe things are partially automated for a woman that goes through this process, but not men? Hmm, if... *IF* gay marriage were to become legal across the nation I bet it would become significantly easier to do. But I don't think that will be happening soon =/
The way I think, both she and I would have a handful of stuff we have to do, but she has licenses and other medical stuff in addition. I can't help think that it would be a huger hassle for her, which makes me sad.

I believe in some states they allow the couple to create a new last name that both take

I would think if any state was gonna do that, it would be mine (CA)


CA allowed Elton John's spouse to be listed as mother on the birth certificates of both sons. That's a bit over the top of a name change.
 
2013-03-03 04:41:30 PM

5monkeys: I May Be Crazy But...: 5monkeys: I could go on and on about how great my so is. I don't though. Who the hell wants to sit and listen to that either?

I'll make you a deal. You listen to me talk about how amazing my fiancee is, and I'll listen to you. I'll even nod at all the right times!

I think a lot of my friends are sick of it. Not that I plan to stop - when you've got a woman as great as her, it's hard not to brag.

Deal! I feel like a jerk saying anything when most of the people I know sound like they want to hire a hit man, or are forever alones. I just try to listen and be supportive.


I recently stopped myself about a second away from bragging to a friend who just went through a messy breakup. Could have been terrible.

Then, on Valentines Day, I complained to a single (and not happy about it) friend that I wasn't going to get to see my fiancee until late in the evening. His expression was a terrifying mixture of jealousy and sadness. I felt like a real ass.
 
2013-03-03 04:42:38 PM

Uchiha_Cycliste: spentshells: Fat Mike is also a douche
And show pony but that's a good tune about a dirty white boy that can't admit he's part of the problem

So she was right? Or at least more right than I was?
Can you elaborate a little please so that I can understand better? thanks a ton.

\I plan to pass along everything I learn to her.


Would but my kids are running wild
 
2013-03-03 04:44:46 PM

NewportBarGuy: thurstonxhowell: I think his use of the phrase "urinate-and-moan" really sums it up nicely. What kind of worthless prick needs that vulgar phrase so badly that they must use it, but can't bring themselves to use it honestly?

[i47.tinypic.com image 465x523]

"I'm a raving douchebag!"


That pic set my gadar off. I'm seeing sparklies and rainbows swirling all around him.
 
2013-03-03 04:46:13 PM
Go on, guys.  Get married.  Your life will be sooo much happier.

www.swaggermagazine.com
 
2013-03-03 04:58:13 PM

lack of warmth: tlchwi02: Uchiha_Cycliste: really?
Can you elaborate please? I'm really curious and interested.

oh and I don't want my poor GF to have my name. her name starts with "ch" and my last name also does. it would sound weird.

Like Chris Christie?  It worked for him.


I was thinking "Ch-ch-ch-ch-ch-ch" like Jason Voorhees is sneaking up on you.
 
2013-03-03 04:59:36 PM

Uchiha_Cycliste: Zelron: Uchiha_Cycliste: NewportBarGuy: A man-child who says he needs a woman to be a better man.

There are some cases where this is true.
For instance the deal I have going with my girlfriend. Though we've only been dating since July, we've been best friends forever. And for at least the last ten years we have had a deal worked out where if she tells me to do something I do it, and if she tells me not to do something I don't. No arguing, no discussion.
When she says you need to go to the hospital right now, I skedaddle to the closest hospital. When she says, no! you can't climb on that! I don't. I seem to lack that little voice that says 'hey, maybe that's not a good idea' so she provides it for me =D

\been best friends for almost 25 years (since we were 6)
\\been pretty deeply in love for at least a couple of years before we started dating. ♥

In other words, you say "Yes dear."  There's only two ways a wife is perfect.  Either you're submissive and do everything she says.  Or she's submissive and does everything you say.  Any other way you disagree and no one's perfect.

We do disagree sometimes, but it usually results in us both learning something and coming at something from different POVs that we share. Never on important things though. With the deal we have worked out, often I'll call or text her and ask if I can do this or that, or I'll let her know if something not good is happening and ask her advice. Other times I can just ask myself, if she were here... would she let me do this? And that's kept me pretty safe (ie not severely injured and alive =D)
We have some debate about this, but we suspect because of the way we grew up, and the influence we've had on each other's tastes over time has resulted in us pretty much feeling the same about most things. Everything important at least. Likewise because of how we've pulled each other through bad times there's no one that knows each of us better than us in the whole world =D. She knows what I'm thinking and vice versa, almost like mind reading.

Interestingly, most of our disagreements occur over subjects involving race. For instance (and this happened yesterday morning, before we drove me to the airport). We were discussing the NoFx song "Don't call me white" I interpret it as don't make assumptions based on race, she thinks they are avoiding and disregarding white privilege. But pretty much there are no situations where submission is required, we are always on the same wavelength. If we differ, we argue on the merits of the situation. An engineer and a doctor are an awesome couple.


Jesus Christ, you talk more than my wife. And, like my wife, all I heard was static. You sure you have testicles?
 
2013-03-03 05:00:43 PM

notatrollorami: Your assumption that your coworkers (and presumably by extension your neighbors, acquaintances, and UPS guy) will not care is regrettably false.  That's what I failed to anticipate.  Because the decision you're considering is atypical it will become your defining attribute.  There's the one armed guy, the cat lady, the midget, the guy with the mullet.  You will be the "guy who took his wifes name".  And the inevitable underpinnings of the conversation that will occur thousands of times as soon as you walk away will be about whether this indicates you are perhaps a nice and considerate husband or a shrinking violet whose wife wears the pants or if you were actively working to end your family name.  Which, BTW, will be the real reason your dad will be upset whether he can effectively communicate it or not.  It will be something he either tries to hide or ignore or the subject of shame and speculation among his peer group.  It's just the nature of going against the grain.

I'm not trying to convince you to change your mind.  At all.  I'm just saying you owe it to yourself and your soon to be wife to really think/talk through the reality of the situation rather than blithely dismissing the repercussions of such a decision.  And if you do take her name be especially wary of gradually developing over-machismo attributes to counteract the inevitable perception of emasculation you will encounter.

Best of luck though man.  Marriage (propertly fed and watered) can make your life better and more meaningful than anything you can possible experience as an individual.


First off, and this is both I think fitting and ironic. Besides licensing and what have you, part of the reason my GF doesn't want to take my name is that it's a reflection of the (still) heavily patriarchal society we have and she doesn't want to be a party to all of that and all of it's assumptions and rules. Personally I can get behind that 100%   and in fact all this extra hassle that it sounds like I'll go through is just another reminder of that state of things. I'm totally okay going the extra mile here to buck that trend and not be a party to it myself.

Next, I would say that I know a lot of my co-workers pretty well and I am pretty darned sure that a decision like this wouldn't be a big bother to them. Partially I think it helps that they are all hardware engineers and we all think a certain way and partially I already have a pretty strong label at work as a hard core cyclist. I ride in every day, I help every one with their bikes. I have a bike stand and wheel truing stand and a tool kit at work. When anyone has any questions, or thoughts about bikes everyone in my building (and the next over) know to come to me. Next, cycling aside, I carry a label of being disabled (hearing loss) and am known for having hearing aids and not always hearing very well. I firmly believe that these labels will stick more strongly than a label whose origin is in my name change. I think I can see how other workplaces and other environments that wouldn't be true, but I really think that doesn't apply as much to my people.  Along those lines, I'm used to having the same conversation a thousand times because of my hearing, and honestly I'd be happier talking about my wife than my ears. =D

As long as one of my two other male cousins get married and have kids my line won't die out. And while I personally don't care much, I should hope that would be enough for my dad.  Although Mom and I don't think that's why he would be upset. We think he'll take it as a personal insult, which is ridiculous, childish and self absorbed. My decision in what I'm doing with my name has nothing to do with him, he doesn't factor into these decisions in any way and I hope I will be able to get him to see that.

I know that my gf would likely be just as happy were we to simply keep our names, but it's important to be (again cuz symbolism) for us to have the same last name as a sign that we have started a new family unit together. =3

You really have given me a lot to think about, and I reckon these things you have said will apply, from a lot of people. I just don't think that my closest and immediate co-workers will be one of those groups. And I know for damn sure it won't be an issue with my friends, who for the most part are already privy to my intentions.  I think it's really interesting to be exposed to all these possible views of what should really be considered a minor thing. A name is just an identifying label used for distinction. I'm still me, and my name doesn't really have anything to do with me, it's just the easiest way to distinguish me from everyone else.  I find it especially interesting and ironic that (apparently) my biggest hurdle will come from my financial institutions. I would have thought that they would actually care the least, not the most. My money doesn't have my signature written on it why on earth do they take such an interest in things as long as the money keeps flowing like always. Anyways thanks again for the heads up and the warning.
 
2013-03-03 05:02:48 PM

rumpelstiltskin: From his Wikipedia page: He was married in August 2012

Snicker.


i0.kym-cdn.com

Give it a decade tough guy.

/by then your back will be f'd up from those squats too if you aren't careful
//douche
 
2013-03-03 05:04:20 PM
Douche of an author aside, I do often wonder why men get married at all when the prevailing attitude seems to be that marriage is the worst mistake you'll ever make, and why you're apparently supposed to resent the person you married.  If she's such a stupid biatch, why did you marry her?  If you think she's a total idiot, can't stand being in the same room with her, want to go out with your buddies just to get away from that nagging harpy of a hedgehog you're married to.... yo, divorce is legal?  Same for women who are always whining about how stupid and lazy their husbands are.  Why did you marry him, then?  Did you not realize he was a dumb, useless oaf looking for a second mommy before you said "I do?"  Occasionally complaining about your spouse is natural-- everyone is annoying sometimes, or has habits you don't like, or whatever, but I don't know.  I just wonder... why did these people marry someone they seem to hate?
 
2013-03-03 05:04:47 PM

ZeroCorpse: The ones who DO insult their wives end up losing them to a guy who isn't a complete ass, who treats her like she deserves (i.e. not talking shiat about her behind her back), and who actually listens and communicates with her.


Nice guys are notorious for getting all the chicks.
 
2013-03-03 05:05:07 PM

JohnnyBravo: Jesus Christ, you talk more than my wife. And, like my wife, all I heard was static. You sure you have testicles?


I can't help it, I just really really love my GF. Talking about her like I have been in this thread makes me happy, because it's a whole bunch of time I get to spend thinking of her =3

I love her so much.
 
2013-03-03 05:15:48 PM

Uchiha_Cycliste: JohnnyBravo: Jesus Christ, you talk more than my wife. And, like my wife, all I heard was static. You sure you have testicles?

I can't help it, I just really really love my GF. Talking about her like I have been in this thread makes me happy, because it's a whole bunch of time I get to spend thinking of her =3

I love her so much.


www.geekosystem.com

/they don't grow back
 
2013-03-03 05:16:57 PM

Uchiha_Cycliste: JohnnyBravo: Jesus Christ, you talk more than my wife. And, like my wife, all I heard was static. You sure you have testicles?

I can't help it, I just really really love my GF. Talking about her like I have been in this thread makes me happy, because it's a whole bunch of time I get to spend thinking of her =3

I love her so much.


Personally, I think that's great.  I'm happy for you, and everyone else who has a good relationship.

I've done nothing but make sarcastic remarks in this thread, but I really do feel happy for you.  Cheers!
 
2013-03-03 05:21:58 PM
FTFA: When men get together, they moan about their wives.

I have never, ever, ever heard that happening.
 
2013-03-03 05:35:08 PM

FloydA: Uchiha_Cycliste: JohnnyBravo: Jesus Christ, you talk more than my wife. And, like my wife, all I heard was static. You sure you have testicles?

I can't help it, I just really really love my GF. Talking about her like I have been in this thread makes me happy, because it's a whole bunch of time I get to spend thinking of her =3

I love her so much.

Personally, I think that's great.  I'm happy for you, and everyone else who has a good relationship.

I've done nothing but make sarcastic remarks in this thread, but I really do feel happy for you.  Cheers!


=3 thanks!
 
2013-03-03 05:36:11 PM

Giant Clown Shoe: Uchiha_Cycliste: JohnnyBravo: Jesus Christ, you talk more than my wife. And, like my wife, all I heard was static. You sure you have testicles?

I can't help it, I just really really love my GF. Talking about her like I have been in this thread makes me happy, because it's a whole bunch of time I get to spend thinking of her =3

I love her so much.

[www.geekosystem.com image 550x330]

/they don't grow back


I assure you, your accusations are just plain nuts.
 
2013-03-03 05:36:28 PM

orbister: FTFA: When men get together, they moan about their wives.

I have never, ever, ever heard that happening.


Ya no shiat... all the wives always know each other.  You think I'm going to trust one of my drunk buddies? F that.

/that's what bartenders and strangers are for.
 
2013-03-03 05:41:31 PM

Uchiha_Cycliste: Giant Clown Shoe: Uchiha_Cycliste: JohnnyBravo: Jesus Christ, you talk more than my wife. And, like my wife, all I heard was static. You sure you have testicles?

I can't help it, I just really really love my GF. Talking about her like I have been in this thread makes me happy, because it's a whole bunch of time I get to spend thinking of her =3

I love her so much.

[www.geekosystem.com image 550x330]

/they don't grow back

I assure you, your accusations are just plain nuts.


Perhaps he's just feeling a bit testy.
 
2013-03-03 05:50:40 PM
"Befuddled mastiff". The kind of phrase rightwingers think makes them sound articulate and masculine. Instead of phony and...phony.

I give him credit for not using "come a cropper."
 
2013-03-03 06:07:17 PM
B'stlla takes for f*cking ever to cook! Started at noon.
 
2013-03-03 06:08:47 PM

FloydA: Uchiha_Cycliste: Giant Clown Shoe: Uchiha_Cycliste: JohnnyBravo: Jesus Christ, you talk more than my wife. And, like my wife, all I heard was static. You sure you have testicles?

I can't help it, I just really really love my GF. Talking about her like I have been in this thread makes me happy, because it's a whole bunch of time I get to spend thinking of her =3

I love her so much.

[www.geekosystem.com image 550x330]

/they don't grow back

I assure you, your accusations are just plain nuts.

Perhaps he's just feeling a bit testy.


His jokes prostrated themselves.
 
2013-03-03 06:09:59 PM

rumpelstiltskin: From his Wikipedia page: He was married in August 2012

Snicker.


Roflmao

Get back to me in 20 years, kid.
 
2013-03-03 06:17:01 PM

violetvolume: Douche of an author aside, I do often wonder why men get married at all when the prevailing attitude seems to be that marriage is the worst mistake you'll ever make, and why you're apparently supposed to resent the person you married.  If she's such a stupid biatch, why did you marry her?  If you think she's a total idiot, can't stand being in the same room with her, want to go out with your buddies just to get away from that nagging harpy of a hedgehog you're married to.... yo, divorce is legal?  Same for women who are always whining about how stupid and lazy their husbands are.  Why did you marry him, then?  Did you not realize he was a dumb, useless oaf looking for a second mommy before you said "I do?"  Occasionally complaining about your spouse is natural-- everyone is annoying sometimes, or has habits you don't like, or whatever, but I don't know.  I just wonder... why did these people marry someone they seem to hate?


I think this pretty much explains why we get married.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1tWHaId1s8U">http://www.youtube.com/w atch?v=1tWHaId1s8U
 
2013-03-03 06:30:46 PM

AbbeySomeone: Uchiha_Cycliste: Great Janitor: I have a great marriage.  It's been a long one.  We recently celebrated our third anniversary.  I had to find a clever way to ask my parents what day I got married because I honestly couldn't remember.  I've only told my wife once that I love her.  She tells me quite often.  I respond with "I know" and "As well you should."  I do have a nickname for her.  Sometime's it's 'Kitchen biatch'.  She's short, so my other nickname for her is 'Person McNugget'.  Now I will admit, that second one is a rather new one.

I have improved her life and made her a better person.  She used to watch sports.  I have pointed out what a waste of time that was and shown her 'Star Trek'.  Now she knows all the Star Trek captains and the difference between a Galaxy Class starship and a Miranda class starship.  She has improved so much that she missed the superbowl this year.  As the person who's been improving her life, I felt proud of this.

It's really a great marriage, one to be envied...

Keep reaching for the spentMiles "achievement unlocked" you've got some work to do but you'll get there.

Janitor put some effort into it but it lacked a little something. I'll offer a 6/10 because I can feel the potential. I was hoping for a line about how her cooking has improved since he threw dinner in the trash until she learned to do better.
/I love Spentmiles.
//happy Uchica is deliriously in love!


I guess no one could possibly start as SpentMiles. He did do well enough that his homage was recognizable, that is a big step in the right direction. I think, I think I agree with your score as long as we agree that the scale is 0- wtfisthisshiat to 10- authentic SM prose.

and Uchiha *IS* deliriously in love.
 
2013-03-03 06:34:24 PM

tlchwi02: lack of warmth: Like Chris Christie? It worked for him.

yeah except my last name is of polish extract, has about 20 letters and is pronounced phonetically. if we went back to the original pronunciation it wouldn't be so bad (supposed to sound like a "sh") I've been sort of flirting with going back to the original pronunciation but never really gotten serious about it

Uchiha_Cycliste: that's really interesting.
It sounds like maybe things are partially automated for a woman that goes through this process, but not men? Hmm, if... *IF* gay marriage were to become legal across the nation I bet it would become significantly easier to do. But I don't think that will be happening soon =/
The way I think, both she and I would have a handful of stuff we have to do, but she has licenses and other medical stuff in addition. I can't help think that it would be a huger hassle for her, which makes me sad.

the issues I've seen tend to be banks or local government thinking your name change is due to some sort of "scam" or something of the sort. its really just because of the cultural prejudice we have against men doing it. I figure what we'll end up doing is she'll take my name, even though I'd prefer she just keep hers (and we could decide on the kids later, or even let them decide when they're old enough.) she is a bit traditional in that respect (although she's lobbying if we use my name that we start pronouncing it correctly)


I mentioned this to  notatrollorami but I think it's Ironic that financial institutions are the biggest pricks about name changes. They strike me as the people that should care the least, it's not like I ave to sign all my bills with my name, as long as the money keeps flowing and they keep getting their cut, one would think they couldn't care less what the name is of the person sending the dough their way.
 
2013-03-03 06:34:28 PM
Go screw yourself buddy...It's my god born American right to detest my marriage...
 
2013-03-03 06:44:40 PM

FarKY502: Go screw yourself buddy...It's my god born American right to detest my marriage...


Then go and do so with ll your heart.
 
2013-03-03 07:19:28 PM

Burn_The_Plows: My Grandmother (Who was married to my Grandfather for over 40 years.) had a favorite saying: "Show me a happily married man and I'll show you a wife who isn't doing her job."


I have never understood it.  Now, granted, I'm not married, mostly because I just recently moved to a place where it's actually legal for me to get married.  But seriously - why do married couples stay in these relationships if they're so farking awful?  Why do they think it's okay to constantly insult and undermine a person they supposedly love?  And why the fark do they stay with someone who constantly criticizes or complains to others about them?

I honestly don't get it.
 
2013-03-03 07:27:13 PM
FTFA: Not only are you a loser for dishonoring the woman who is now an extension of yourself

Mrs. Crowder must feel so honored.
 
2013-03-03 07:44:48 PM

Benevolent Misanthrope: But seriously - why do married couples stay in these relationships if they're so farking awful?


a) Catholicism
b) tradition
c) money
d) shunning
e) fear of dying alone
f) medical insurance.
 
2013-03-03 07:46:59 PM

Karne: p51d007: Who says you have to be married to be "happy"?

Co-dependent people.


I thought it was about the tax breaks. Or should I stop banging married chicks?
 
2013-03-03 08:01:26 PM

Uchiha_Cycliste: Benevolent Misanthrope: But seriously - why do married couples stay in these relationships if they're so farking awful?

a) Catholicism
b) tradition
c) money
d) shunning
e) fear of dying alone
f) medical insurance.


Seriously?  Or are you joking?  Because it doesn't have to be that way - I'm doing just fine on my own, thank you, no need to depend on someone else for money or insurance.  It didn't just happen, either - I grew up poor and put myself through school to get a decent job.  And the other reasons should apply to me, a single woman, but I seem to be surviving happily.

Oh well.  Each to his own, I suppose.  Then again, maybe my refusal to be miserable, support a freeloader, ignore abusive behavior, or put up with more-than-average shiat is why I'm still single.  So there's that.
 
2013-03-03 08:07:03 PM

frankmigacz: He just got his first "Married Filing Jointly" tax refund. $5 that Wifey will be sick of his shiat first.


Yup.  Given what an amazingly acute dickberry he continues to demonstrate that he is, unless playing a character as masterfully as Stephen Colbert, she's gonna dump him pretty quick.
 
2013-03-03 08:28:16 PM
When men get together, they moan about their wives

i152.photobucket.com
 
2013-03-03 08:51:26 PM

Uchiha_Cycliste: FloydA: Uchiha_Cycliste: Giant Clown Shoe: Uchiha_Cycliste: JohnnyBravo: Jesus Christ, you talk more than my wife. And, like my wife, all I heard was static. You sure you have testicles?

I can't help it, I just really really love my GF. Talking about her like I have been in this thread makes me happy, because it's a whole bunch of time I get to spend thinking of her =3

I love her so much.

[www.geekosystem.com image 550x330]

/they don't grow back

I assure you, your accusations are just plain nuts.

Perhaps he's just feeling a bit testy.

His jokes prostrated themselves.


I agree, but you must admit that it made a vast deferens to the thread.
 
2013-03-03 09:12:26 PM
Stupid article written by an ignorant douchebag, but whatever floats his boat...I've been married once and divorced once.  I'm living in sin with the love of my life that I met almost 20 years ago.  Will we get married?  Probably, but not for at least another 5 years until his son turns 18.  I will not take his name, nor will I merge finances, etc.  He knows this, bless him.  However, we live as man and wife, and have held ourselves out in public as such, so in Colorado, we're legally married.  I am not eager to jump back on to the marriage bandwagon anymore than he is, but there is something to be said of marriage, and although my experience was awful, I do love to read of my fellow Farkers and Farkettes sharing their happy and (probably) honest stories.
 
2013-03-03 10:20:54 PM

Benevolent Misanthrope: Uchiha_Cycliste: Benevolent Misanthrope: But seriously - why do married couples stay in these relationships if they're so farking awful?

a) Catholicism
b) tradition
c) money
d) shunning
e) fear of dying alone
f) medical insurance.

Seriously?  Or are you joking?  Because it doesn't have to be that way - I'm doing just fine on my own, thank you, no need to depend on someone else for money or insurance.  It didn't just happen, either - I grew up poor and put myself through school to get a decent job.  And the other reasons should apply to me, a single woman, but I seem to be surviving happily.

Oh well.  Each to his own, I suppose.  Then again, maybe my refusal to be miserable, support a freeloader, ignore abusive behavior, or put up with more-than-average shiat is why I'm still single.  So there's that.


You seem to be free of the burdens of societal trapping/mindf*ckings and the anguish that follows. Good for you.
 
2013-03-03 10:40:43 PM

AbbeySomeone: Benevolent Misanthrope: Uchiha_Cycliste: Benevolent Misanthrope: But seriously - why do married couples stay in these relationships if they're so farking awful?

a) Catholicism
b) tradition
c) money
d) shunning
e) fear of dying alone
f) medical insurance.

Seriously?  Or are you joking?  Because it doesn't have to be that way - I'm doing just fine on my own, thank you, no need to depend on someone else for money or insurance.  It didn't just happen, either - I grew up poor and put myself through school to get a decent job.  And the other reasons should apply to me, a single woman, but I seem to be surviving happily.

Oh well.  Each to his own, I suppose.  Then again, maybe my refusal to be miserable, support a freeloader, ignore abusive behavior, or put up with more-than-average shiat is why I'm still single.  So there's that.

You seem to be free of the burdens of societal trapping/mindf*ckings and the anguish that follows. Good for you.


Thanks.  It took time to get myself unf*cked, though.
 
2013-03-04 12:00:10 AM

Donkey Hodie: In a couple of months I will celebrate my 20th wedding anniversary with my wife.  We still love each other, and get along great.  But the author hasn't lived long enough or had enough experience in the world if he thinks a spouse, even a loving, kind, funny, happy, cool, sexy one, will not ever be a pain in the ass.  I try not to disparage my wife in front of others, but he's in a fantasy land if he thinks a good marriage never has any arguments or times when one or both partners are not perfect.  Sometimes my wife has been a pain in my ass.  Sometimes I've been a pain her hers.  A good marriage is not one that never experiences difficulties, but one in which both partners work through them together when they do occur.


Agreeing with all this (almost 16 years married here).

I'll say that he sounds like he does have some reasonably toxic friends though. I consulted with Mr. Brug and we agreed that, while our respective friends might occasionally complain a bit about spouses, generally speaking it's mild and in passing - not some tirade (unless there really are some serious marital difficulties, trending towards divorce).
 
2013-03-04 12:34:50 AM

Benevolent Misanthrope: Uchiha_Cycliste: Benevolent Misanthrope: But seriously - why do married couples stay in these relationships if they're so farking awful?

a) Catholicism
b) tradition
c) money
d) shunning
e) fear of dying alone
f) medical insurance.

Seriously?  Or are you joking?  Because it doesn't have to be that way - I'm doing just fine on my own, thank you, no need to depend on someone else for money or insurance.  It didn't just happen, either - I grew up poor and put myself through school to get a decent job.  And the other reasons should apply to me, a single woman, but I seem to be surviving happily.

Oh well.  Each to his own, I suppose.  Then again, maybe my refusal to be miserable, support a freeloader, ignore abusive behavior, or put up with more-than-average shiat is why I'm still single.  So there's that.


I am being serious. And unfortunately speaking from close and extended family experiences. I guess e) was sarcastic, but all the others I *know* people that stick in a marriage because of them. I don't really think it's so good of an arrangement, but it's not my place to say anything. I'm just sharing reasons that I know of for people having not divorced.
 
2013-03-04 01:00:10 AM

Cubs300: WorkingInParadise: Although I am still married to the woman I married, the woman I am married to is not the woman I married...

That is why I soon will no longer be married. You summed it up quite nicely, sir.


"Men marry women thinking that they'll never change;
Women marry men thinking of all the ways they're going to change them."

-- Confucious say??!!
 
2013-03-04 01:05:21 AM
Umm... I would never badmouth my husband. He wouldn't do it to me either. Why is this so hard to believe for so many people?
 
2013-03-04 01:15:32 AM

dramarama: Umm... I would never badmouth my husband. He wouldn't do it to me either. Why is this so hard to believe for so many people?


Umm... It's not hard to believe that a recently married man that has never had sex until marriage would not bad mouth his wife.  I think most people here have no problem believing that he is madly in love and with no complaints about his beautiful marriage.   The thing is, for most men, after a few years or five or ten, things change and there usually becomes some issues that a man can complain about, whether it's lack of sex, a wife that put on 80 lbs, a wife that doesn't do anything, or one that spends money like its going out of style even when the family is deeply in debt.   Of course there are a few exceptions, but they are few and far between.
 
2013-03-04 01:57:00 AM
How many of you get paid to write this?

While we're having so much fun here let's not let the release of the new healthcare law or the us credit rating get in our way
 
2013-03-04 02:15:28 AM
Well, I didn't hate this article.  I mean, if you don't like who you're married to then why the fark are you still married?

But seriously, when he's been married 30 years and doesn't even feel the need to shut the door when he shiats, then he can come back and tell us what's wrong with us sluts.
 
2013-03-04 03:15:43 AM

not_an_indigo: Well, I didn't hate this article.  I mean, if you don't like who you're married to then why the fark are you still married?

But seriously, when he's been married 30 years and doesn't even feel the need to shut the door when he shiats, then he can come back and tell us what's wrong with us sluts.


I'm not married, but I've been owned by a wonderful woman for ten years. I would not dream of even farting in her presence.

Worship her, guys.  Like a goddess. That is the road to happiness.
 
2013-03-04 07:22:29 AM

ten foiled hats: This reminds me of an episode of Everybody Loves Raymond.  You're in love, God bless you, you know nothing, or something along those lines.

/DNRTFA  (skimmed, which was plenty)


Was it that one episode where Ray did something stupid, his wife got pissed, and he spent the rest of the episode trying to make it up to her?  Remember that one?
 
2013-03-04 08:26:16 AM

frankmigacz: He just got his first "Married Filing Jointly" tax refund. $5 that Wifey will be sick of his shiat first.


You sure about that?  I don't think he has had time for the "Oh its a tax BILL? well you pay it honey" vs next years "Oh a tax refund, its half mine! Gimmie!"
 
2013-03-04 08:38:26 AM

orbister: FTFA: When men get together, they moan about their wives.

I have never, ever, ever heard that happening.


It's different.  Women will get together and biatch about how their husbands aren't treating them as the center of the universe.  Then they tell each other how they are right to feel that way, and let's start planning that 'girls trip to Jamaica'.

Men get together and biatch about what their wives have each done to torpedo their financial lives.  In the end, they go home thinking that life could be worse, so they better go to work the next day.
 
2013-03-04 09:52:25 AM
Dear Author,

Congratulations on transforming a private joy into mere fodder for the culture wars.
Your lovely wife must be so pleased, if she's as shallow and insecure as you are.

- Fifteen Years of Bliss, Bickering, and None-of-your-Business
 
2013-03-04 10:30:20 AM
My girlfriend and I just stayed with my ex-wife and her fiance for a the weekend so I'm getting.. off... about some of your replies.  :)

O yes, we fought and I biatched about her.  Whatever.
 
2013-03-04 11:32:00 AM
Wow, that guy... what an asshole.  I could care less that he gets along with his wife OF A COUPLE OF MONTHS.  The whole tone of that self righteous screed was ... god damn, what a dick!  fark you.  I love my wife.  We fight, we have snappy moments, we laugh, we make up, we plan.  If everything was perfect IT WOULD BE BORING.  I didn't marry ME I married HER.  And yeah, sometimes she pisses me off, that's because I'm INVESTED.  I CARE and sometimes she does things that I don't agree with and gives me crap about things about which I should know better.  It's annoying because I UNDERSTAND THAT SHE CARES TOO.

All those people with "perfect" spouses are fooling themselves.  Either you or they are sweeping the problems under the rug or you simply don't care enough to address them.

That and, I just... I want to punch this guy.  What a dick!
 
2013-03-04 03:42:10 PM
Oh it is that guy.  He is a troll, just like everyone else at fnc.
 
2013-03-07 10:49:33 AM
 
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