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(WTKR)   The Navy goes old school and paints new Littoral Combat Ship in a WWII camouflage pattern, now with color-shifting paint   (wtkr.com) divider line 82
    More: Spiffy, warships  
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9446 clicks; posted to Geek » on 02 Mar 2013 at 12:34 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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NFA [TotalFark]
2013-03-02 09:43:00 AM
Worst video evar!
 
2013-03-02 09:46:41 AM
Ooooh! Littoral... that makes much more sense.
 
2013-03-02 10:06:36 AM
2 minutes o guys painting, 2 seconds of what ship looks like after paint job. Lame.
Here is what a real dazzle ship looks like:
surfcollectivenyc.com
The reason that this is obsolete is because no one targets ships optically anymore. Ships could be painted florescent orange and it wouldn't make a bit of difference.
 
2013-03-02 10:39:59 AM
Still a colossal waste of money.  That ship is exhibit #2 (behind the F35) of complete government waste at the feet of feckless defense contractors.
 
2013-03-02 10:41:31 AM
Oh, and the Navy missed a spot - they forgot to camouflage the farking wake that the ship leaves behind as it moves.

/boats can't be stealthy
//they're boats
 
2013-03-02 11:51:42 AM

Grand_Moff_Joseph: /boats can't be stealthy


cdn.slashgear.com
 
2013-03-02 12:35:00 PM
Hrmh.
 
2013-03-02 12:38:02 PM
No bedazzled ship was ever sunk in WWII.
 
2013-03-02 12:42:53 PM
Another episode of "Pimp my warship".

Reality shows are getting rediculous.
 
2013-03-02 12:46:39 PM
Shifting colors? WHAR?!??! All I see is two lame blocks painted into the side.

Terrible video, misleading premise, crappy results.

I bet that "upgrade" cost the Navy an extra $30 million.
 
2013-03-02 12:58:09 PM

IgG4: 2 minutes o guys painting, 2 seconds of what ship looks like after paint job. Lame.
Here is what a real dazzle ship looks like:
[surfcollectivenyc.com image 500x333]
The reason that this is obsolete is because no one targets ships optically anymore. Ships could be painted florescent orange and it wouldn't make a bit of difference.


Actually there are quite a few guided missile technologies that rely on optical sensors. The AGM-65 Maverick family (and the Russian equivalent...Kh29?) comes to mind. There's probably a way to screw with those targeting systems with the right kind of paint (you'd need something that works in the infrared spectrum probably) and the right patterns (a lot of older seeker heads use straight contrast tracking, that'd probably be pretty easy to mess with).
 
2013-03-02 12:58:14 PM
Cool.

csb
Years ago I worked for a marina and bought a cheap old 16' MFG. 2 cans of white and 1 can of black later I had a Dazzle paint job.  The girl at the Registry didn't understand "Dazzle" as the color. Old Navy guy set her straight. Name? PBR Streetgang.
/csb

More on Dazzle from RISD:
http://dazzle.risd.edu/
 
2013-03-02 12:58:23 PM
Shame about the "music".
 
2013-03-02 01:02:30 PM
surfcollectivenyc.com


vs

yasgargraphics.files.wordpress.com

It looks like zebras evolved their own dazzle coloring.  (or we just copied it from them).

The wide stripes draw attention to the rump.  Here kitty kitty kitty.
 
2013-03-02 01:09:05 PM
Two minute video of paint drying...I don't see it.
 
2013-03-02 01:13:04 PM

Grand_Moff_Joseph: Still a colossal waste of money.  That ship is exhibit #2 (behind the F35) of complete government waste at the feet of feckless defense contractors.


QFT
 
2013-03-02 01:13:31 PM

studebaker hoch: [surfcollectivenyc.com image 500x333]


vs

[yasgargraphics.files.wordpress.com image 507x393]

It looks like zebras evolved their own dazzle coloring.  (or we just copied it from them).

The wide stripes draw attention to the rump.  Here kitty kitty kitty.



We copied it from them.   Abbott Thayer's  Concealing Coloration in the Animal Kingdom (1909) was widely used by the army in WWI in the early efforts to develop camouflage.
 
2013-03-02 01:13:38 PM
I'm all for painting warships in artsy-fartsy ways. We don't need dazzle these days, but I think it gives the ships a nice zing! That said: the modern version is all fail; gimme the old patterns with the new paint.

Alas, you can paint a floating turd and it's still a floating turd.
 
2013-03-02 01:13:56 PM

Betep: Cool.

csb
Years ago I worked for a marina and bought a cheap old 16' MFG. 2 cans of white and 1 can of black later I had a Dazzle paint job.  The girl at the Registry didn't understand "Dazzle" as the color. Old Navy guy set her straight. Name? PBR Streetgang.
/csb

More on Dazzle from RISD:
http://dazzle.risd.edu/



Did he also sell her a hoodie?
 
2013-03-02 01:15:06 PM
Clitoral combat ship...anyone?
 
2013-03-02 01:16:33 PM
Don't worry, we can rename this thing the Clitoral Wombat Ship and sell it to the Australians. They buy any American crap we shovel their way, and vice versa.
 
2013-03-02 01:17:13 PM

heinrich66: Clitoral combat ship...anyone?


no one would find it then
 
2013-03-02 01:17:44 PM
The purpose of this paint job is to make it difficult to identify the ship optically and to gauge the distance. So the millions spent on this might make like a little harder on the little boats that Iran would use in a swarm.

And since apparently only the LCS is getting this, most of the point is gone.
 
2013-03-02 01:18:31 PM

NFA: Worst video evar!


yeah...really.....thought I was watching a Maaco commercial..except with a ship (pops)
www.maaco.com



Save yourself the time...here is how it ends.
i.imgur.com
 
2013-03-02 01:21:39 PM
i309.photobucket.com
 
2013-03-02 01:22:31 PM

whither_apophis: Grand_Moff_Joseph: Still a colossal waste of money.  That ship is exhibit #2 (behind the F35) of complete government waste at the feet of feckless defense contractors.

QFT


But we named it the Freedom Class!

\Actually unfamiliar with the story behind this one, can anyone fill me in?
 
2013-03-02 01:28:26 PM

Betep: Years ago I worked for a marina and bought a cheap old 16' MFG. 2 cans of white and 1 can of black later I had a Dazzle paint job.  The girl at the Registry didn't understand "Dazzle" as the color. Old Navy guy set her straight. Name? PBR Streetgang.



You named your boat after a fictional boat.  A boat whose crewmembers were attacked by a tiger, killed by gunshot, spearing and beheading, and rendered catatonic after participating in animal sacrifice.

I thought sailors were more superstitious than that.  What are you going to do next, legally change your name to Cap'n Quint?
 
2013-03-02 01:33:27 PM

NFA: Worst video evar!


+1

IgG4: 2 minutes o guys painting, 2 seconds of what ship looks like after paint job.


And they don't show the colors shifting.
 
2013-03-02 01:37:24 PM

cptjeff: whither_apophis: Grand_Moff_Joseph: Still a colossal waste of money.  That ship is exhibit #2 (behind the F35) of complete government waste at the feet of feckless defense contractors.

QFT

But we named it the Freedom Class!

\Actually unfamiliar with the story behind this one, can anyone fill me in?


The Navy needed a minesweeper with enhanced strawberry protection capability.
 
2013-03-02 01:39:15 PM

Honest Bender: Grand_Moff_Joseph: /boats can't be stealthy

[cdn.slashgear.com image 580x395]


Still not stealthy, but not for the reason you might think.

The ship itself it masked from radar very well...so much so that it leaves what essentially appears as an empty void in the middle of the water, which then gives away the ship's position since something must be there making that void.
 
2013-03-02 01:41:59 PM

TheOther: [i309.photobucket.com image 400x199]


i105.photobucket.com

Holy crap, it's a vampire!
 
2013-03-02 01:42:35 PM

Grand_Moff_Joseph: Oh, and the Navy missed a spot - they forgot to camouflage the farking wake that the ship leaves behind as it moves.

/boats can't be stealthy
//they're boats


www.naval-technology.com


The US Navy has had stealth vessels for well over 100 years now.
 
2013-03-02 01:48:54 PM

InfrasonicTom: heinrich66: Clitoral combat ship...anyone?

no one would find it then


So you are saying there is a new stealth technology and we aren't even using it?
 
2013-03-02 02:17:04 PM

Cymbal: InfrasonicTom: heinrich66: Clitoral combat ship...anyone?

no one would find it then

So you are saying there is a new stealth technology and we aren't even using it?


"Security by obscurity" is hardly a new concept. Just because something is hidden under a blanket next to a pile of blankets doesn't mean that a dedicated person won't just look under every blanket in order to find what he's looking for.
 
2013-03-02 02:19:02 PM

One Bad Apple: Grand_Moff_Joseph: Oh, and the Navy missed a spot - they forgot to camouflage the farking wake that the ship leaves behind as it moves.

/boats can't be stealthy
//they're boats

[www.naval-technology.com image 550x367]


The US Navy has had stealth vessels for well over 100 years now.


Submarine =/= boat.

No, I don't care what it's called by who. It's not a boat. It's a sub.
 
2013-03-02 02:20:19 PM
I was hoping for at least a computer generated pattern or something like the pixel type camouflage patterns.
 
2013-03-02 02:22:36 PM
Some modern  missles from various countries use automatic target recognition where the seeker head compares what it is seeing to a data base of objects.

Some missles also use guidance systems based on optical recognition....oh look theres a creek theres a mountian and a farmhouse....time to turn left.
 
2013-03-02 02:37:56 PM
I've done a fair amount of work on the LCS ships, both the Monohull and Trimaran types. I *heart* the trimaran sooo much, because it looks bad ass, and because it has a humongous equipment bay and flight deck. The basic idea, having a "seaframe" that you install modular mission packages on is a great idea, and ultimately something that will save us money, IF it's done right.

Dislike: There really isn't any need for the damm things to go 40 knots. You need quick reaction? Launch aircraft and drones. The compromises they made to get these ships up to 40 knots are unacceptable. They could had had a much tougher and cheaper ship if they had avoided the waterjet/gas turbine crap.

Like: the trimaran bridge. It is the most Star Trekkie looking bridge in the Navy. More flatscreens than a sports bar, and carpeted floor. And cupholders. Really.
 
2013-03-02 02:41:51 PM

madgonad: The purpose of this paint job is to make it difficult to identify the ship optically and to gauge the distance. So the millions spent on this might make like a little harder on the little boats that Iran would use in a swarm.

And since apparently only the LCS is getting this, most of the point is gone.


Right. Razzle-Dazzle was designed to screw with submarines trying to calculate a ship's speed and direction based solely on visual info. And torpedo bombers from above. Sonar and radar made such camouflage obsolete.
 
2013-03-02 02:42:40 PM

ThatGuyOverThere: Cymbal: InfrasonicTom: heinrich66: Clitoral combat ship...anyone?

no one would find it then

So you are saying there is a new stealth technology and we aren't even using it?

"Security by obscurity" is hardly a new concept. Just because something is hidden under a blanket next to a pile of blankets doesn't mean that a dedicated person won't just look under every blanket in order to find what he's looking for.


There is no sense in searching for that which does not exist.
 
2013-03-02 02:43:00 PM

kroonermanblack: One Bad Apple: Grand_Moff_Joseph: Oh, and the Navy missed a spot - they forgot to camouflage the farking wake that the ship leaves behind as it moves.

/boats can't be stealthy
//they're boats

[www.naval-technology.com image 550x367]


The US Navy has had stealth vessels for well over 100 years now.

Submarine =/= boat.

No, I don't care what it's called by who. It's not a boat. It's a sub.


It's a boat.
 
2013-03-02 03:01:46 PM
With a name like Littoral, I expect a more cunning headline.
 
2013-03-02 03:03:39 PM
It's a electric boat.
 
2013-03-02 03:11:08 PM
Cool paint job.  So what?  Given what's under the hood it's like getting an awesome new paint job on an '86 Fiero.
 
2013-03-02 03:54:50 PM
Can we go back to painting teeth and naked ladies on jets now, too?
 
2013-03-02 04:00:17 PM
Color shifting paint?

upload.wikimedia.org
 
2013-03-02 04:08:16 PM

studebaker hoch: It looks like zebras evolved their own dazzle coloring. (or we just copied it from them).

The wide stripes draw attention to the rump. Here kitty kitty kitty.


No the stripes aren't for the lions. They are to confuse biting insects.
 
2013-03-02 04:10:08 PM
Corporate sponsorship of military ships, planes, tanks is the way to go. What would Coca-Cola or Budweiser pay for a fleet of ships with their logos protecting the Strait of Hormuz? The buzz created would be priceless.
 
2013-03-02 04:27:49 PM
I don't even have to know how much that ship cost to know it cost too much.
 
2013-03-02 04:48:08 PM
 
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