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(Cracked)   The five most unintentionally hilarious '80s music videos, and before you ask, yes, Billy Squier's "Rock Me Tonite" made the list   (cracked.com) divider line 103
    More: Fail, Billy Squier, Wham, Hip hop, Wham Rap, Revenge of the Nerds, music videos, Run Dmc, dance music  
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8611 clicks; posted to Entertainment » on 02 Mar 2013 at 3:14 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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Pud [TotalFark]
2013-03-02 12:39:49 PM  
#6?

/It go so bad at one point that if I heard that one more time I was going to get stabby
 
2013-03-02 01:04:50 PM  
#5. Wham! -- "Wham Rap!" (1982)
i.imgur.com
 
2013-03-02 02:20:55 PM  

homelessdude: Wham Rap!


Coincidentally, that's what George Michael now calls it when he slaps a man in the face with his cock while they're in a men's room stall.
 
2013-03-02 03:03:15 PM  
 
2013-03-02 03:22:08 PM  
The Journey one where they wear zebra stripe prints and walk toward the cameraman a lot. The drummer may even be holding his drumsticks.
 
2013-03-02 03:26:39 PM  

Pud: #6?

/It go so bad at one point that if I heard that one more time I was going to get stabby


Rapture is so white, even the black guy in the video has no rhythm.
 
2013-03-02 03:30:11 PM  

Pud: #6?

/It go so bad at one point that if I heard that one more time I was going to get stabby


dude, disco/rap?
 
2013-03-02 03:36:29 PM  
They forgot..
v026o.popscreen.com

Now it;s over
 
2013-03-02 03:37:06 PM  

Great Janitor: Pud: #6?

/It go so bad at one point that if I heard that one more time I was going to get stabby

dude, disco/rap?


Doesn't sound like a test
 
Pud [TotalFark]
2013-03-02 03:39:48 PM  

Great Janitor: Pud: #6?

/It go so bad at one point that if I heard that one more time I was going to get stabby

dude, disco/rap?


Disco was mostly late 70's. In the early 80's white people were trying to mix disco with rap for some damned reason (maybe it was supposed to be "cool"). I think it was more of a withdrawal than innovation. Disco Stue, and Jane needed something ..ANYTHING.
Think about it for a moment.

unyon: Pud: #6?

/It go so bad at one point that if I heard that one more time I was going to get stabby

Rapture is so white, even the black guy in the video has no rhythm.


It sucked out loud ....literally.
 
2013-03-02 03:45:21 PM  

Pud: In the early 80's white people were trying to mix disco with rap


White people looked different in the early 80's

userserve-ak.last.fm
 
2013-03-02 03:52:54 PM  
at least they didn't have justin beiber
 
2013-03-02 03:55:22 PM  
 
2013-03-02 03:56:18 PM  
 
2013-03-02 04:01:53 PM  
 
2013-03-02 04:05:52 PM  
 
2013-03-02 04:08:59 PM  
Missing Candlemass and Grim Reaper.

Or really, any music video from a low budget metal band.
 
2013-03-02 04:09:54 PM  

Iggie: Aldo Nova - Fantasy

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MUL_VgxxYus


I forgot about that one. I love that song! Used to hear it all the time at the roller rink and the bowling alley.

/"I'm Still Standing" has Bruno Tonioli in it, it can't be bad.
 
2013-03-02 04:10:38 PM  
What about Pat Benatar "Love is a Battlefield"

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j9J9rTZJBmw
 
2013-03-02 04:14:03 PM  
 
2013-03-02 04:14:28 PM  
I was surprised this slice of classic 80s WTF didn't make the list.
 
2013-03-02 04:21:52 PM  
No one considered any of that stuff to be gay in the 80's. In fact, you could walk down the street chugging a big fat cock, and no one would bat an eye.
 
2013-03-02 04:22:16 PM  
One of these links has to be a rickroll, right?

/seems oblig
 
2013-03-02 04:24:20 PM  

WhippingBoy: No one considered any of that stuff to be gay in the 80's. In fact, you could walk down the street chugging a big fat cock, and no one would bat an eye.


...while wearing your vest with no shirt underneath and hanging out at a factory that manufactured sparks?

/oh, wait, that was only if you were a 1980s metal fan.
 
2013-03-02 04:27:10 PM  

WhippingBoy: No one considered any of that stuff to be gay in the 80's. In fact, you could walk down the street chugging a big fat cock, and no one would bat an eye.


No one knew. We thought it was just heavy metal.

http://www.bing.com/videos/search?q=judas+priest+video&mid=94C33B47A 9C 3810D814494C33B47A9C3810D8144&view=detail&FORM=VIRE6
 
2013-03-02 04:29:03 PM  
Oh lord, we've got ourselves a skipper.

I love this so much.
 
2013-03-02 04:44:49 PM  
Looking back you'll realize that pretty much every music video from the 80s is unintentionally hilarious. Between the clothing, hair, makeup and cheesy effects they're all pretty funny to watch. My contribution.

Safety Dance
 
2013-03-02 04:45:34 PM  

FirstNationalBastard: WhippingBoy: No one considered any of that stuff to be gay in the 80's. In fact, you could walk down the street chugging a big fat cock, and no one would bat an eye.

...while wearing your vest with no shirt underneath and hanging out at a factory that manufactured sparks?

/oh, wait, that was only if you were a 1980s metal fan.


Oh I was. I was.
 
2013-03-02 04:48:37 PM  
 
2013-03-02 04:52:33 PM  

Dingleberry Dickwad: Looking back you'll realize that pretty much every music video from the 80s is unintentionally hilarious. Between the clothing, hair, makeup and cheesy effects they're all pretty funny to watch. My contribution.

Safety Dance


That dance wasn't as safe as they made it out to be.
 
2013-03-02 04:52:41 PM  
Golden Earring

NSFW

Love the song, but the video is a bit dopey. Nice little 80's breasts though.
 
2013-03-02 04:54:05 PM  

pounddawg: What about Pat Benatar "Love is a Battlefield"

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j9J9rTZJBmw


THREATENING BOOBIE SHAKE!!
 
2013-03-02 04:58:55 PM  
Turn around, bright eyes.
 
2013-03-02 05:06:31 PM  

DeathRaySanta: Peter Cetera stars as The Indestructible Pussy-Whipped Man


Stalkers across America saw the video and went 'slow down there, fella.'  But still... dayum. I'd drive her Olds.
 
2013-03-02 05:08:11 PM  

Iggie: Aldo Nova - Fantasy


Guitar phasers and leopard-print spandex. We're totally done here.
 
2013-03-02 05:08:57 PM  

SurfaceTension: pounddawg: What about Pat Benatar "Love is a Battlefield"

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j9J9rTZJBmw

THREATENING BOOBIE SHAKE!!


What boobies?
 
2013-03-02 05:15:17 PM  

SPna15: Missing Candlemass and Grim Reaper.

Or really, any music video from a low budget metal band.


You leave Grim Reaper out of this!

They're a guilty pleasure of mine, but it's true...they were awful, and so were their videos.

I don't remember anything from the list except the Billy Squier video; I'm pretty sure it ruined his career.
 
2013-03-02 05:18:32 PM  
No Journey Separate Ways?

/invisible instruments FTW
 
2013-03-02 05:28:46 PM  
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oVnKhB3pt4A (sfw if not your non-14 year-old-ears)

Can you guess the scene that would never make it to the final edit were this to be filmed today? (superhint: it's found betwixt 2:15 and 2:45).

VH1 Classic Metal Mania for the...win?
 
2013-03-02 05:33:20 PM  
And one misplaced hyphen for the lose.
 
2013-03-02 05:41:08 PM  

pounddawg: What about Pat Benatar "Love is a Battlefield"

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j9J9rTZJBmw


I remember reading/hearing somewhere that she hated making that video. I don't blame her one bit, either.
 
2013-03-02 05:56:46 PM  
And you cannot forget Tawny Kitaen writhing all over that Jaguar in the Whitesnake video, "Here I Go Again"?

i.imgur.com


More recently she was in one of the earlier incarnations of Celebrity Rehab.
www.tawny-kitaen.com
 
2013-03-02 06:01:54 PM  

Iggie: Aldo Nova - Fantasy

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MUL_VgxxYus



Came for this, etc, etc.

/Great tune, though
 
2013-03-02 06:07:40 PM  
There was no way that list would not include "I'm Still Standing." That video made some of Freddie's drag stuff look silly.

Speaking of the god himself... It's hard to pick just one that's not ridiculous beyond words.  That being said, I choose this one.
 
2013-03-02 06:15:54 PM  
Billy Squier should be #1 because that video essentially ended his career.
 
2013-03-02 06:21:20 PM  

hogans: Turn around, bright eyes.


I walk onto a terrace
where I think I'm alone.
But Arthur Fonzarelli's
got an army of clones.
(Fonzi's been cloned!)

They do the Macarena
but I'm still not impressed.
They beg for me
to dance with them,
but not in this dress!
 
2013-03-02 06:25:14 PM  
Queen of the Ryche.

The song shreds and they're one of my favorite bands, but this video is cheesier than Lambeau Field during a Packer's home game.
 
2013-03-02 06:26:53 PM  

Free Radical: No Journey Separate Ways?

/invisible instruments FTW


I remember a number of years ago when either MTV or VH1 did a countdown of the worst videos ever, and that one made #1.  Now I'm a big Journey fan, but I will agree that that was pretty horrific, but compared to some of these, at least that one didn't make a person cringe QUITE as much. IMO
 
2013-03-02 06:37:12 PM  

homelessdude: And you cannot forget Tawny Kitaen writhing all over that Jaguar in the Whitesnake video, "Here I Go Again"?


HEY!  For a great many farkers (and people in general) of a certain age, many presumably on this thread, that was some Excellent fap material, up there with Cindy Crawford in bikinis back in the day!  You show some respect!

Although looking at it now, pretty much everything Whitesnake ever did was unintentionally funny.  For that matter, the same applied looking at it then.  So I guess just leave '80's Tawny and carry on.
 
2013-03-02 06:54:05 PM  
No Journey Separate Ways?

/invisible instruments FTW

I remember a number of years ago when either MTV or VH1 did a countdown of the worst videos ever, and that one made #1.  Now I'm a big Journey fan, but I will agree that that was pretty horrific, but compared to some of these, at least that one didn't make a person cringe QUITE as much. IMO


OH COME ON GUYS
it's a great video. sure, it's cheesy, but it's pretty cool. it's not just a shot of the singer the whole time. They equally film the whole band. And no cheezy animated or computer graphics.
 
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