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(The New York Times)   How one couple found a baby in the subway, adopted him as their own, and finally got married by the judge who changed their lives. It's getting really dusty in here   (opinionator.blogs.nytimes.com) divider line 64
    More: Spiffy, baby, Great Idea  
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9407 clicks; posted to Main » on 01 Mar 2013 at 5:03 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-03-01 01:20:35 PM

Willas Tyrell: Another Government Employee: It had been linked to me earlier.

The Judge bent all sorts of rules, but somehow she knew this was the right human.

The Judge didn't bend any rules.  The child was in foster care and it's up to the Judge to ensure an appropriate foster care placement.  If at a hearing three months after the kid was found on the subway the Judge asks a witness about adoption availability, that almost certainly means there are no family members available (given the facts, it's possible the bio-family was never identified).  If the child is in non-kinship, non-preadoptive foster care, and the good samaritan who picked him up off the subway floor passes a preliminary home-study and agrees to be a pre-adoptive foster home this is exactly what should happen.

The adoption didn't happen any faster than the caseworker said; it's just that the couple were the foster parents while it was pending.

My question: why not name the Judge?  Every Family Court Judge who issues an order anyone disagrees with has their name plastered everywhere; this Judge does something everyone seems to agree is great but is left anonymous.


Mitzvah is best done in the dark.
 
2013-03-01 02:10:14 PM

WhyteRaven74: BronyMedic: It's not hard to find these signs.

I don't think those signs were around when they found the baby. Though I wholly endorse the point you're making.


Uh, those signs have been around since at least the mid-80s around here, and I live in Kentucky :D  (Then again, I think KY may well have pioneered the Safe Place program, which was originally meant for teenage runaways and later expanded to baby-safe-haven programs.)

Glad that babby was found and later adopted by what sounds like the best two daddies they could have had.

The two things that do make me sad re this story:

a) Someone abandoned babby in subway rather than dropping babby off at a safe haven, which (last I checked) damn near every police and fire department and lots of hospitals qualify as.

b) There are--sadly--people in the US who would have rather the babby died in the subway rather than be rescued because OH NOES BABBY WOULD HAVE TWO DADDIES AS ITS ADOPTIVE PARENTS.  (Yes, live in and near states that not only have constitutional bans on same-sex marriages, but often ban adoption by same-sex and single parents who'd be quite willing to even give those "Wednesday's Child" special-needs adoptions a home.  But nooooooo, say the dominionists, who apparently live under the peculiar delusion that The Gay is somehow contagious and that babby is being adopted as a future leatherboy bottom-in-training; I seriously have to wonder if they had similar delusions when the same folks railed against mixed-race marriages about the darker partner's colour rubbing off.)

/still, though, lots and lots of blessings upon the happy couple
//and if you has baby and can't care for it, hospitals and fire stations and police stations are baby safe havens in most areas
 
2013-03-01 02:12:21 PM

publikenemy: If they weren't gay, this would not be a story...just sayin


And if the guy had just walked away from the abandoned baby, this wouldn't be a story.  And if the judge hadn't offered adoption, this wouldn't be a story.  And if the author/partner hadn't agreed to become a parent, this wouldn't be a story.  And if the dog hadn't stopped to take a crap, he would have caught the rabbit.

What's your point?
 
2013-03-01 02:14:02 PM

1nsanilicious: publikenemy: If they weren't gay, this would not be a story...just sayin

Well it certainly wouldn't be a story Fark would be interested in.

Also what's with that safe place sign, it looks like the adult is doing something wrong to that child.


Actually, here in KY (where there has been a Safe Place program in conjunction with Home of the Innocents and YMCA for the better part of a quarter century--and yes, as it turns out, Louisville DID pioneer it; national headquarters are still located here) they did recently change the design of the signs to just say "Safe Place" rather than the "adult hugging kid" pic...apparently they'd seen the parodies involving Sandusky online and figured they'd best change it to avoid confusion :D
 
2013-03-01 02:22:01 PM

BronyMedic: Hey, assholes?

[www.familyconnection-inc.org image 462x462]

It's not hard to find these signs. If you don't want your baby, awesome. Deliver it to the nearest place which offers emergency medical treatment and transport -  Fire Station, Ambulance Station, or Hospital ER, and tell them you want to abandon it under the SafePlace Law your state has. They have to do so, no questions asked, if it's under a year. You don't even have to give your contact information, IIRC.

DONT DUMP THE KID IN A farkING SUBWAY.


Or if you're in one of those areas with a long-established program, look for these signs too:

nationalsafeplace.org
(This is the newer variant that looks less gropey, but indicates the same thing--a safe haven for babbies and other kids.  They'll get babby to a place where it can be taken care of with no recrimination to you.)

/of note--Safe Place is also useful for not only runaways but "throwaways"--kids kicked out of their home or who must leave due to a risk of severe abuse.  LGBT kids DO have a disproportionate rate of homelessness because of a disproportionate number of "throwaways", many of whom may be literally running for their lives from anti-LGBT-motivated child abuse.
 
2013-03-01 02:34:37 PM
There ya go, an unintended pregnancy resulting in a shotgun marriage.

Still, lucky Kevin. I cringe to think of what could have happened to the poor little guy.
 
2013-03-01 03:36:50 PM

The Beatings Will Continue Until Morale Improves: Subway babies: eat fresh!


I laughed quite heartily at this.  More than I should have.

On a serious note, that's a god damn wonderful story.  Good on all of the people involved.

/You all needed to know how I felt about the story
//You're welcome!
 
2013-03-01 03:51:21 PM

Great Porn Dragon: WhyteRaven74: BronyMedic: ...b) There are--sadly--people in the US who would have rather the babby died in the subway rather than be rescued because OH NOES BABBY WOULD HAVE TWO DADDIES AS ITS ADOPTIVE PARENTS.  (Yes, live in and near states that not only have constitutional bans on same-sex marriages, but often ban adoption by same-sex and single parents who'd be quite willing to even give those "Wednesday's Child" special-needs adoptions a home.  But nooooooo, say the dominionists, who apparently live under the peculiar delusion that The Gay is somehow contagious and that babby is being adopted as a future leatherboy bottom-in-training; I seriously have to wonder if they had similar delusions when the same folks railed against mixed-race marriages about the darker partner's colour rubbing off.)

/still, though, lots and lots of blessings upon the happy couple
//and if you has baby and can't care for it, hospitals and fire stations and police stations are baby safe havens in most areas


You know, when I first read the story I had a few misgivings on the couple.  But as I went on, I realized they WERE the right parents for the job.  The final test will be in ten years or so when K leaves the nest.  I'm guessing he will be returning more love and blessing (in the form of grandchildren who will also be greatly loved) back.
 
2013-03-01 04:10:23 PM
I love this story. Thanks, Subby!
 
2013-03-01 06:20:04 PM

Great Porn Dragon: WhyteRaven74: BronyMedic: It's not hard to find these signs.

I don't think those signs were around when they found the baby. Though I wholly endorse the point you're making.

Uh, those signs have been around since at least the mid-80s around here, and I live in Kentucky :D  (Then again, I think KY may well have pioneered the Safe Place program, which was originally meant for teenage runaways and later expanded to baby-safe-haven programs.)

Glad that babby was found and later adopted by what sounds like the best two daddies they could have had.

The two things that do make me sad re this story:

a) Someone abandoned babby in subway rather than dropping babby off at a safe haven, which (last I checked) damn near every police and fire department and lots of hospitals qualify as.

b) There are--sadly--people in the US who would have rather the babby died in the subway rather than be rescued because OH NOES BABBY WOULD HAVE TWO DADDIES AS ITS ADOPTIVE PARENTS.  (Yes, live in and near states that not only have constitutional bans on same-sex marriages, but often ban adoption by same-sex and single parents who'd be quite willing to even give those "Wednesday's Child" special-needs adoptions a home.  But nooooooo, say the dominionists, who apparently live under the peculiar delusion that The Gay is somehow contagious and that babby is being adopted as a future leatherboy bottom-in-training; I seriously have to wonder if they had similar delusions when the same folks railed against mixed-race marriages about the darker partner's colour rubbing off.)

/still, though, lots and lots of blessings upon the happy couple
//and if you has baby and can't care for it, hospitals and fire stations and police stations are baby safe havens in most areas


I have you marked as a favorite, so don't kill me.
Texas was the first state to enact a "Baby Moses Law" in 1999.
 
2013-03-01 08:00:22 PM
The best thing about subway babies is that they will have the immune system of a god, having already been exposed to every disease known to mankind.
 
2013-03-01 09:37:46 PM

TheSelphie: publikenemy: If they weren't gay, this would not be a story...just sayin

Bullshiat.  I got to the middle of the article where it says "HE WAS A GAY MAN IN A RELATIONSHIP" before I realized they were talking about a gay couple.  Didn't read the author's name.  It was still an amazing story even before the reveal.


I did the exact same thing. I assumed the writer was a woman. People don't find babies in the subway every day and get to keep them. Life usually doesn't work out this well for this loving couple and their beloved, unexpected son. Great story.
 
2013-03-01 09:57:54 PM

TheSelphie: I got to the middle of the article where it says "HE WAS A GAY MAN IN A RELATIONSHIP" before I realized they were talking about a gay couple. Didn't read the author's name. It was still an amazing story even before the reveal.


The reveal's at the end where the picture indicates HE IS A METS FAN.

Those. Farking. Monsters. They're going to scar that kid for life.
 
2013-03-02 07:35:30 AM

Great Porn Dragon: /of note--Safe Place is also useful for not only runaways but "throwaways"--kids kicked out of their home or who must leave due to a risk of severe abuse.  LGBT kids DO have a disproportionate rate of homelessness because of a disproportionate number of "throwaways", many of whom may be literally running for their lives from anti-LGBT-motivated child abuse.


Yes, but that's celebrated on FARK. Those kids are that way because their parents don't beat them enough. Didn't you read the transgendered kid thread a few days back?
 
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