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(Time)   A fascinating (and heartbreaking) look through a photographer's lens as she chronicles one couple's descent in domestic violence   (lightbox.time.com) divider line 585
    More: Sad, domestic violence, Ohio University  
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30766 clicks; posted to Main » on 28 Feb 2013 at 10:06 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-03-01 08:09:51 AM
Anyone know of resources (online or otherwise) for people who were abused by a partner?  Please note, this Farkette is uninsured.  This thread reminds me of all the unresolved shiat I never addressed.  Being told 'I must have liked it' is the worst, most farking ignorant thing someone can say.

Learning what 'boxing someone's ears' meant was the worst, especially when they do it out of nowhere half a dozen times in one night. Ugh.

/moonscatter?
//it was just last year
 
2013-03-01 08:19:24 AM
In the modern age, where information is everywhere, I have to ask what kind of modern woman would take being abused even once. This is not the 50's where you have nobody to go to. Women do not grow up today ignorant about the world. Why would a woman think getting to know a guy in prison, then dating and being with him is a good idea? Why?

Guys so the same thing, get whipped, have no spine, are miserable and to wuss to do anything about it, so it is not just women. Lots of people who are just maybe weak and scared.
 
2013-03-01 08:20:49 AM
I'm from Perry County OH, and I delivered plenty of pizzas to the trailer park in Somerset growing up. 350 W Sheridan Ave, it's been 12 years now and I still am not about to forget that address.

Business as usual, really. Borderline Appalachian community, basically poor, uneducated white trash. The article does say that they moved to Somerset from somewhere else, though.
 
2013-03-01 08:24:22 AM

Thunderpipes: In the modern age, where information is everywhere, I have to ask what kind of modern woman would take being abused even once. This is not the 50's where you have nobody to go to. Women do not grow up today ignorant about the world. Why would a woman think getting to know a guy in prison, then dating and being with him is a good idea? Why?

Guys so the same thing, get whipped, have no spine, are miserable and to wuss to do anything about it, so it is not just women. Lots of people who are just maybe weak and scared.


Are you trolling or are you always this f*cking retarded?
 
2013-03-01 08:41:26 AM

Tat'dGreaser: Thunderpipes: In the modern age, where information is everywhere, I have to ask what kind of modern woman would take being abused even once. This is not the 50's where you have nobody to go to. Women do not grow up today ignorant about the world. Why would a woman think getting to know a guy in prison, then dating and being with him is a good idea? Why?

Guys so the same thing, get whipped, have no spine, are miserable and to wuss to do anything about it, so it is not just women. Lots of people who are just maybe weak and scared.

Are you trolling or are you always this f*cking retarded?


My points are perfectly valid, you liberal little Cretin. Answer the question. Tell me why Mrs. Saucy Pants went to the prison dating website, why she thought that was a good idea.
 
2013-03-01 08:43:09 AM

Thunderpipes: My points are perfectly valid, you liberal little Cretin. Answer the question. Tell me why Mrs. Saucy Pants went to the prison dating website, why she thought that was a good idea.


No they're not. Thank you for confirming that you're a stupid little man.
 
2013-03-01 08:46:03 AM

Tat'dGreaser: Thunderpipes: My points are perfectly valid, you liberal little Cretin. Answer the question. Tell me why Mrs. Saucy Pants went to the prison dating website, why she thought that was a good idea.

No they're not. Thank you for confirming that you're a stupid little man.


In other words, I am right, you got nothing.

Go get my fries, put your hand in my pocket, and tattoo my name around your neck. I will sell you out for 5 smokes.

Anyone in the world with half a brain could see where her ingenious plan would lead. Fact you are defending that stupidity sheds light on the capacity of your Obama fascinated mind.
 
2013-03-01 08:50:14 AM

Dion Fortune: Does anyone else feel like these pictures are fake/staged?  Maybe I'm just in denial, but it seems too perfect: a cute blonde lady, cuter daughter, a guy with all these tattoos and his shirt off showing off chiseled muscles, and the house is so clean.

Anyway, domestic violence is sad ;_;


Mentioned it, nobody has a response.

Seriously, why would they let a person take pictures like this, and as a photographer, these are NOT snapshots, they required setting up, adjustments, colour balance, etc.

I understand that many on Fark have stories... heck I probably trump most, but my technical side kicked in for this one, and I really don't believe that they let someone take pictures while a full rage scenario was happening.

/my ex, a female, was abusive and violent.
 
2013-03-01 08:50:34 AM

Thunderpipes: Anyone in the world with half a brain could see where her ingenious plan would lead. Fact you are defending that stupidity sheds light on the capacity of your Obama fascinated mind.


Lulz, I voted for Gary Johnson you f*cking moron
 
2013-03-01 08:56:34 AM

schatz: I know FARK is not usually the forum for this sort of post, but I had a hard time with the photo of him chocking her, because my ex choked me a few times, and it was farking terrifying.  The shiat is, I was not raised in an abusive home.  White, Protestant middle-class suburban upbringing.  Strong mom.  Said ex was the only violent one, the rest were lambs.  I didn't think it could happen to me: I was educated, and thought if some guy EVAR tried to hit me, I'd go all GI Jane and kick his ass before kicking him to the curb.  I still can't understand why the hell I put up with several violent incidents before finally leaving when I was being choked again, but from behind with a bread knife scraping across my collarbone.  I still cross my fingers hoping my mom will never notice the scar.


Glad you survived.  Hope God or karma or whatever gets your ex, or he sees the error of his ways and gets some help.

Peace to you
 
2013-03-01 09:02:41 AM
BafflerMeal

FARK rebel soldier: Random Anonymous Blackmail: Date An Inmate

I am sure her release date or 2023-2040 in no way is a red flag.

Would you like letters from both sexes? Yes
and nowhere what she's in for

Murder.


Winner!
 
2013-03-01 09:07:29 AM

imfallen_angel: Dion Fortune: Does anyone else feel like these pictures are fake/staged?  Maybe I'm just in denial, but it seems too perfect: a cute blonde lady, cuter daughter, a guy with all these tattoos and his shirt off showing off chiseled muscles, and the house is so clean.

Anyway, domestic violence is sad ;_;

Mentioned it, nobody has a response.

Seriously, why would they let a person take pictures like this, and as a photographer, these are NOT snapshots, they required setting up, adjustments, colour balance, etc.

I understand that many on Fark have stories... heck I probably trump most, but my technical side kicked in for this one, and I really don't believe that they let someone take pictures while a full rage scenario was happening.

/my ex, a female, was abusive and violent.


Hmm. You are another one who didn't read the article that accompanied the pictures aren't you? If you had you would have know that the photographer was working on a project about the stigma associated with being an ex-con, and this guy had agreed to be the focus of her project, then one night during the course of taking pictures for the project this broke out.
 
2013-03-01 09:17:40 AM

GoSurfing: Not going to claim to be a nice guy, but seriously, the women I've liked that didn't give me the time of day were more talented/smarter/awesome/etc in every way, shape, form. That's honestly what I thought. It wasn't a "putting her on a pedestal" complex either, rather just knowing you couldn't compete with someone way higher on the social ladder.


This is a pattern of thinking. Considering anyone to be "more talented/smarter/awesome/etc in every way, shape, form" screams low self-esteem and strikes me as a bit creepy. If I met someone who thought of me like that, I'd run far and run fast.
 
2013-03-01 09:22:42 AM

ladyfortuna: These threads always make me feel like hugging a lot of you. Curse this digital divide...


If not for the "lady" in your name, I would have found that really creepy.  But seriously, this article and thread are so damn sad.
 
2013-03-01 09:28:12 AM

Mistress Jedana: She missed a lot of warning signs--competition with the young son, overcompensating with the daughter.


The fact that he was in prison when they met.
 
2013-03-01 09:31:30 AM

WhippingBoy: GoSurfing: Not going to claim to be a nice guy, but seriously, the women I've liked that didn't give me the time of day were more talented/smarter/awesome/etc in every way, shape, form. That's honestly what I thought. It wasn't a "putting her on a pedestal" complex either, rather just knowing you couldn't compete with someone way higher on the social ladder.

This is a pattern of thinking. Considering anyone to be "more talented/smarter/awesome/etc in every way, shape, form" screams low self-esteem and strikes me as a bit creepy. If I met someone who thought of me like that, I'd run far and run fast.


You're getting dangerously close to self-patronizing territory.  "That person's not better than me.  We've just made different life choices.  I'm exactly the person who I want to be, yeah really, and if I was that person the [insert trivial detail] would make all the money and power totally not worth it to me.  Seriously guys, I mean that.  My girlfriend in Canada tells me wealth matters even less than penis size, which totally doesn't matter to her but if it did I'd still be on top of the charts.  She doesn't like when it's too big."

No, you live in a trailer park and I live in a mansion.  I am better than you.  Deal with it.
Reese Witherspoon is better than me, and as a result I'll never be with her.  And I'm OK with that.  Accepted it years ago.
/Plus Legally Blonde 2 kind of knocked her down a peg IMHO.
 
2013-03-01 09:51:36 AM
They need to show this kind of thing in schools. Maybe it will help some dumb kids from making these same mistakes.
 
2013-03-01 09:57:57 AM

serial_crusher: WhippingBoy: GoSurfing: Not going to claim to be a nice guy, but seriously, the women I've liked that didn't give me the time of day were more talented/smarter/awesome/etc in every way, shape, form. That's honestly what I thought. It wasn't a "putting her on a pedestal" complex either, rather just knowing you couldn't compete with someone way higher on the social ladder.

This is a pattern of thinking. Considering anyone to be "more talented/smarter/awesome/etc in every way, shape, form" screams low self-esteem and strikes me as a bit creepy. If I met someone who thought of me like that, I'd run far and run fast.

You're getting dangerously close to self-patronizing territory.  "That person's not better than me.  We've just made different life choices.  I'm exactly the person who I want to be, yeah really, and if I was that person the [insert trivial detail] would make all the money and power totally not worth it to me.  Seriously guys, I mean that.  My girlfriend in Canada tells me wealth matters even less than penis size, which totally doesn't matter to her but if it did I'd still be on top of the charts.  She doesn't like when it's too big."

No, you live in a trailer park and I live in a mansion.  I am better than you.  Deal with it.
Reese Witherspoon is better than me, and as a result I'll never be with her.  And I'm OK with that.  Accepted it years ago.
/Plus Legally Blonde 2 kind of knocked her down a peg IMHO.


I try to treat women (and men) as human beings, not unattainable, "superhuman" goddesses or conquests for met to obtain.
Using your example, from what I know about her (which isn't much), my impression of Ms. Witherspoon is that she's somewhat humourless and not a particularly pleasant person. As a result, she'll never be with me.

I guess I'm just more of a sociopath than you.
 
2013-03-01 09:59:55 AM
i.imgur.com

I'm sorry, but with a neck tattoo there's little chance this would end happily.

/do disagree with the lower arm in red in this pic, but for the most part it's spot on.
 
2013-03-01 10:03:40 AM

John Buck 41: 19 y/o and she has a 4 y/o? Wow. Not that he's an angel, for sure.

Sad tag fits. Too well.


It kind of makes sense I suppose. I mean, she's just a kid.  And kids made dumb mistakes.  Everyone else can tell you that you're walking into a trap, but when you're seeing everything for the first time - when it's your first rodeo - you think it'll be different. or at least not that bad. Or that you're unstoppable, that invincibility complex and danger rush that just goads you into the very thing you should avoid.  I pity her.  It's a hard lesson.
 
2013-03-01 10:05:55 AM
Someone posted this in the NH Rep thread Wednesday night. Still working through the comments... just want to know, wtf?... this week has been a bastion of domestic violence triggers. Had one of the worst night terrors last night, feel like a zombie today and see this on here with close to 500 comments.

My blood won't boil reading it though. I'm too numb, so at least there's that.
 
2013-03-01 10:07:12 AM

ongbok: Hmm. You are another one who didn't read the article that accompanied the pictures aren't you? If you had you would have know that the photographer was working on a project about the stigma associated with being an ex-con, and this guy had agreed to be the focus of her project, then one night during the course of taking pictures for the project this broke out.


hmm... I did.. and that still doesn't invalid my question...

Someone that's going full retard wouldn't stop and pose for someone standing right there with a camera, they'd either tell them to get the fark out, or get stupid (and possibly violent) with them, but they sure wouldn't stand for the shutter clicking while in full rage.

The other pictures (before the violence) I understand and they did the setup and such, and that's fine, but during the fit itself...?

Sorry but I don't see it happening... the camera or even manual focus wouldn't have been fast enough in an enclosed room while the guy's storming about... this isn't a sport moment with high-end equipment with small aperture and high (day) light... most of these are images that are using proper lighting, and not a flash, and those with flash, aren't the result that you can get under snapshot circumstances and you can't get this sort of exposure in low light situation on the whim.

The arguing in the car for example... come on... who would light the interior car lights while arguing?  If an outside light, well crap, they'd say something about that I'd think.

As if the girl (at the stove) wouldn't be yelling "help" to the person taking the picture when being slapped around and choked.

Then the little girl getting in there while the person taking the picture just stands there... way to cripple that kid even more by adding your nonchalant presence.... "Hey kid, get involved with your mom's beating while I snap pictures for a school project... it's be cool, it'll add drama to all this, and you'll now know that people just stand there when crap happens."

Sorry, but while I'm completely on the side that abusive relationships are nasty (having lived it myself)... this doesn't show me anything that doesn't prove that it's not staged.

I can almost hear "Jerry, Jerry, Jerry" in the background.

As a project, it's very visual, and the tattooed guy in the personification of the stereotype of what people consider what abusive men look like.

Has anyone found the arrest info, mugshot?
 
2013-03-01 10:10:33 AM
Jesus Christ this is heartbreaking.  Not surprised at all this happened in SE Ohio.  That place may be beyond help.
 
2013-03-01 10:13:43 AM
Funny how white trash always find cash for tats, piercing, booze and smokes but find buying food for the kids challenging.
 
2013-03-01 10:16:32 AM

imfallen_angel: As a project, it's very visual, and the tattooed guy in the personification of the stereotype of what people consider what abusive men look like.


You should take a look at my abusive ex. Middle class, damn good job (at the time), no tattoos, well dressed, clean cut.

Other than that, I just don't have the heart today to argue any of your other points.
 
2013-03-01 10:19:30 AM

Slam1263: ...

No fisticuffs, no hard ass noise, just a little bit of experience with dumb young males, I am a former Marine, I was young and dumb, and everyone went home verticle.

Honest ...


there was an almost indentical situation in my city recently, where the Slam1263 equivalent got stabbed to death doing this
 
2013-03-01 10:22:24 AM

schatz: Anyone know of resources (online or otherwise) for people who were abused by a partner?  Please note, this Farkette is uninsured.  This thread reminds me of all the unresolved shiat I never addressed.  Being told 'I must have liked it' is the worst, most farking ignorant thing someone can say.

Learning what 'boxing someone's ears' meant was the worst, especially when they do it out of nowhere half a dozen times in one night. Ugh.

/moonscatter?
//it was just last year


Wow, I am so sorry that you dealt with idiots. There are lots of free counseling and other services available to victims of domestic violence. I know; I am myself. If you want to it may be easier to discuss in email rather than posting everything, if not I understand. It is really easier to find by state, even easier by city. Here in Pierre, for example, is Missouri Shores. Lots of resources.

/EIP if you want some links to various services
//truly hope that you find people who are not so dumb... deserved it... damn that pisses me off
 
2013-03-01 10:23:27 AM

gaslight: So, she left the soldier hubby when he was deployed because Mr Rock'n'Roll would give her bad boy thrills....and we're supposed to feel sorry for her? I feel sorry for her kids, certainly and her ex-husband, but she seems like a fool.


as christopher waltz would say, that's a bingo
 
2013-03-01 10:25:16 AM

moonscatter: 2wolves: moonscatter: gja: serial_crusher: "found jesus in prison"

Wow. Even he got busted?
DAY-UM!

I seriously had a running joke about a "pastor of the week" being a respondent in a protective order case. Even had one asshole state that "demons made me do it" and tried to elicit testimony from the victim that demons were real. Utterly bizarre.

Thank you for your service.

It was a privilege, no thanks will ever be needed.I wish every day I could have done more. And I have two dear friends who fight in the trenches still every day and I do all I can to support them. Every pro  bono case I take involves domestic violence on some level.

I wish I had the strength to make it a career, but perhaps among the most heartbreaking professions are those that deal with this. And the people who do this work are my personal heroes, each and every one.


Gosh it's dusty in here...
 
2013-03-01 10:26:36 AM

moonscatter: I spent almost two years getting protective orders for victims of domestic violence. I wish I could say this was a unique situation, but it isn't. It reads like a "worst of" the cases I handled. Isolating the victim from her family/support system, attaching at a time of weakness, ensuring that she believes that he can't be better without her, the tattoo (seen variations on this too many times, including a guy who came into court with a t shirt emblazoned with her picture and "i miss you" airbrushed on it).

And violence in front of the kids is the same as doing it TO The kids. The damage is incredible to their young  minds/psyches.


i spent near five years at the public defenders office.  at one time we were allowed to resolve domestic violence cases with what's known as "civil compromise"

"civil compromise" is an agreement between the victim and defendant to avoid criminal charges & prosecution, usually in exchange for money or the defendant providing a service

- i.e. if the defendant was accused of breaking the victim's window, defendant would pay to fix window and perhaps help install it or even come over to clean it.. entirely up to the victim.  as long as the defendant agreed and did it, everyone went on their merry way - no records, no trials etc.)

so we used to be allowed to resolve domestic violence cases this way -

the classic line when we showed up to the victim to propose this was "sign the papers or go another round with the champ."

they almost always signed

/may sound brutal, but when they stopped allowing this remedy we'd show up and just ask the victim "are you coming to trial??"  -  they almost always refused to
/csb
 
2013-03-01 10:29:12 AM
let's all jizz into a sock and beat him with it
 
2013-03-01 10:33:43 AM

bunner: Let's cut the sh*t once and fer all on all of this "women only like jerks" and "nice guys never get a chance" crap.

Of course some women like jerks.  It's vanity.  They're not in that relationship to be with that guy.  They're in that relationship to prove to themselves that they can "tame" him, straighten him out and so she can tell her BFFs all about how "oh, he has a temper but I can wrap him around my finger if I want to".  Cause she's good enough.  She's got the goods.  She can ride that tiger and give as good as she gets!  Woo.  And that's nice.  So, hey nice guys?  You really want somebody like that that in your life?  Who sees  relationships in that way?  No.  You don't.

Now then, guess how many shallow meatheads want a Barbie doll or a shrew or both because "oh, hey, you know she's the boss! Yeah, she keeps me in line! Heh heh"  Nudge wink.  Guess how many of them are "nice guys".  A lot.  And both of these sort are cut from the same cloth.  And we can only hope they find each other.  But it's not the point.  Desirable man does not equal slab o' beef with a mean streak any more than desirable woman is one who has a hot ass and a stick up it or the word "welcome" embossed on her back.  So it seems that a lot of this boo hooing about "nice guys never getting the hot girl" and "there's just no good men" is a load of horesesh*t from people who ever never managed to or bothered to sit down next to somebody and actually shoot the sh*t with them long enough to find out if THEY LIKE WHO THAT PERSON IS.  Cause that's the point.

So if you want to waltz through your whole life wondering why that size 8 doesn't fit your size 10 foot or looking for somebody to read the other half of the movie script you etched in stone that shall be your love life, well, GREAT.  But shut the f*ck up about it when nobody is quite oppressive or disposable enough to read their lines to your liking.  Cause that ain't love, that's dress up.  And even if you hit paydirt, you'll get bored sh*less with not having anything to complain about. Love isn't just staring into each other's eyes longingly for hours on end.  It's wonderful, but it's just the frosting.  The cake is being able to sit out and look at the world together and see the same view.  There is an ass for every seat, but stop trying to sell yourself people who don't need to be with who they see you as.  It's pointless.  The day you are ready to find love is the day that you stop givin' a William or Nilliam f*ck as to what your friends, mommy, daddy or people at work will think of them because you're too busy getting ready for what promises to be a really wonderful adventure for two.  Let the trophy hunters play by their own idiot rules.  Yeah, even the victims, the lunkheads, the shallow cows and the nice guys.  Be better.  Try smiling more.  People are attracted to happy people. Seriously. The chip on your shoulder or the bug up your ass is barbed wire.


You. I like you.
 
2013-03-01 10:35:34 AM

Tat'dGreaser: Thunderpipes: My points are perfectly valid, you liberal little Cretin. Answer the question. Tell me why Mrs. Saucy Pants went to the prison dating website, why she thought that was a good idea.

No they're not. Thank you for confirming that you're a stupid little man.


lulz

are you really defending the idea of looking for "mr. right" on a prison dating site?

and you have the balls to call someone else 'stupid'

9/10  - you earned every bit of that
 
2013-03-01 10:36:11 AM

CapeFearCadaver: imfallen_angel: As a project, it's very visual, and the tattooed guy in the personification of the stereotype of what people consider what abusive men look like.

You should take a look at my abusive ex. Middle class, damn good job (at the time), no tattoos, well dressed, clean cut.

Other than that, I just don't have the heart today to argue any of your other points.


Actually that is my point exactly...

My ex, female, most wouldn't have had a clue that she was this bad, and then she'd flip out and they'd see the reality, but no one saw it as bad and as much as I did.

I have no point to argue.. I simply believe that the pictures are staged, as this is a school project and I don't believe an abuser like this, would stand having someone stand there snapping pictures of him while he's trashing the woman around..
 
2013-03-01 10:36:37 AM

schatz: I know FARK is not usually the forum for this sort of post, but I had a hard time with the photo of him chocking her, because my ex choked me a few times, and it was farking terrifying.  The shiat is, I was not raised in an abusive home.  White, Protestant middle-class suburban upbringing.  Strong mom.  Said ex was the only violent one, the rest were lambs.  I didn't think it could happen to me: I was educated, and thought if some guy EVAR tried to hit me, I'd go all GI Jane and kick his ass before kicking him to the curb.  I still can't understand why the hell I put up with several violent incidents before finally leaving when I was being choked again, but from behind with a bread knife scraping across my collarbone.  I still cross my fingers hoping my mom will never notice the scar.


It's hard to head things that mirror something I have been through. My sympathies.

I probably wouldn't be here if my family wasn't so awesome. A good education helped, too.
 
2013-03-01 10:37:36 AM

Random Anonymous Blackmail: BafflerMeal

FARK rebel soldier: Random Anonymous Blackmail: Date An Inmate

I am sure her release date or 2023-2040 in no way is a red flag.

Would you like letters from both sexes? Yes
and nowhere what she's in for

Murder.

Winner!


Back off scumbags, she's MINE.
 
2013-03-01 10:39:08 AM

megarian: schatz: I know FARK is not usually the forum for this sort of post, but I had a hard time with the photo of him chocking her, because my ex choked me a few times, and it was farking terrifying.  The shiat is, I was not raised in an abusive home.  White, Protestant middle-class suburban upbringing.  Strong mom.  Said ex was the only violent one, the rest were lambs.  I didn't think it could happen to me: I was educated, and thought if some guy EVAR tried to hit me, I'd go all GI Jane and kick his ass before kicking him to the curb.  I still can't understand why the hell I put up with several violent incidents before finally leaving when I was being choked again, but from behind with a bread knife scraping across my collarbone.  I still cross my fingers hoping my mom will never notice the scar.

It's hard to head things that mirror something I have been through. My sympathies.

I probably wouldn't be here if my family wasn't so awesome. A good education helped, too.


*hard to hear things

/coffee
 
2013-03-01 10:42:52 AM

dennysgod: [i.imgur.com image 610x629]

I'm sorry, but with a neck tattoo there's little chance this would end happily.

/do disagree with the lower arm in red in this pic, but for the most part it's spot on.


================

Having tats on your forearms means you will never have a real job?   I know a cop who had full sleeves on both arms.

/It isn't what you know, it's who you know.
 
2013-03-01 10:46:19 AM

GoodOmens: Surprised no one's commented on the fact that this couple would argue over money yet had a huge ass TV in their living room.

Priorities I guess - poor kids.


According to TFA, they're at a friend's house.
 
2013-03-01 10:47:15 AM
I am not blaming her for the domestic violence, but part of being a Mother is making sure you can financially support your children.  She was looking to him for financial support, and he could not even provide for himself. Before you give birth, make sure you can afford your children.  Many times, the father of your children will not or cannot provide for them.  It's sad, but true.
 
2013-03-01 10:52:21 AM

imfallen_angel: I simply believe that the pictures are staged, as this is a school project and I don't believe an abuser like this, would stand having someone stand there snapping pictures of him while he's trashing the woman around..


When your ex was in a rage that was directed at you, would anything else take her attention off of that rage she had with you? Could she be snapped to notice anything else that was going on around her besides her anger with you?

The way my ex was, he wouldn't have even noticed another person around at certain point of his rage. Every ounce of his attention was focused on me and his rage at me and his need to punish me. Anything else peripheral did not enter the equation. I can totally see it.
 
2013-03-01 10:54:42 AM

dennysgod: [i.imgur.com image 610x629]

I'm sorry, but with a neck tattoo there's little chance this would end happily.

/do disagree with the lower arm in red in this pic, but for the most part it's spot on.


lol freaking wut? that graph is just dumb
guessing these folks pay a LOT more taxes than any of us do

4.bp.blogspot.com
beckhamtattoo.com
hoopdrive.com

/dumb stereotype is dumb
 
2013-03-01 10:56:02 AM
Ok.... Kept telling myself I wouldn't post this but here goes. abbreviated CSB: Dad respected in the community, mom stayed married to him 20+ years, beatings, guns pulled, verbal and mental abuse... Mom finally divorces him in '78 (me 10, older brother 14, younger sister 7) Moves us 1600 miles away in '79 because she realized that it would just continue even with the divorce. Fast forward WAY to many years.... Married to a wonderful woman (that puts up with my crap) and we have three amazing kids that I am awed by every single day. Every time I feel that I am about to Lose my temper I stop and remember the terror when I saw my father on top of my mom choking her and my older brother (11years old) with a shotgun pointed at my fathers head....... Well the cycle of abuse CAN be broken. And all it takes is self awareness, the will to do better and realizing that the only people that truly have your back in this world are dearly loved friends and family. The question I always had was: why would you abuse the only people in this world that would accept you for who you are, no matter what?!?!
 
2013-03-01 10:56:46 AM

serial_crusher: He's probably illiterate and the tattooist told him it means "strength"


Friend came back from summer camp convinced they'd named him "trash" because they liked him so much, which got a lot of snickers behind his back. I thought that was a bit too far. He was more just a screwup.
 
2013-03-01 10:58:06 AM

FarkAllPoliticians: The question I always had was: why would you abuse the only people in this world that would accept you for who you are, no matter what?!?!


I just want to internet hug you. Thank you for breaking that cycle.
 
2013-03-01 10:59:44 AM

serial_crusher: Onkel Buck: If you ladies ever ask yourself where all the good guys are, they are right where you left them, in the "Friend Zone"

I try not to stick around that long after being friendzoned.  If that "nice guy" is still where you left him, he's probably a wimp.


I agree, which brings us to the other end of the spectrum, the reason she isn't dating you is because she already has a pussy
 
2013-03-01 11:01:29 AM

inner ted: lol freaking wut? that graph is just dumb
guessing these folks pay a LOT more taxes than any of us do

[4.bp.blogspot.com image 400x352]
[beckhamtattoo.com image 430x247]
[hoopdrive.com image 500x347]

/dumb stereotype is dumb


Implying they aren't hard prison inmates with the $ to stay out...
 
2013-03-01 11:03:53 AM

CapeFearCadaver: When your ex was in a rage that was directed at you, would anything else take her attention off of that rage she had with you? Could she be snapped to notice anything else that was going on around her besides her anger with you?

The way my ex was, he wouldn't have even noticed another person around at certain point of his rage. Every ounce of his attention was focused on me and his rage at me and his need to punish me. Anything else peripheral did not enter the equation. I can totally see it.


This. Predator sees only movement, crazy sees only their target.
 
2013-03-01 11:04:36 AM

Yogimus: Staple this to your door. (literally this: print it out)

[media.masslive.com image 665x481]


He looks like back up QB Charlie Batch.
 
2013-03-01 11:06:29 AM

what_now: He doesn't understand why she cares more sour her children than she cares about him?


Warning sign #1, huh?
 
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