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(Time)   A fascinating (and heartbreaking) look through a photographer's lens as she chronicles one couple's descent in domestic violence   (lightbox.time.com) divider line 585
    More: Sad, domestic violence, Ohio University  
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30763 clicks; posted to Main » on 28 Feb 2013 at 10:06 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-02-28 06:59:22 PM
wow...
 
2013-02-28 07:18:27 PM
That made me too sad to make any snark about the names of the kids.
 
2013-02-28 08:08:54 PM
Sounds interesting, if only the pics would load
 
2013-02-28 08:23:04 PM
At first I was thinking, "so many pics, really?" Then I was hooked. Horrific.
 
2013-02-28 08:38:07 PM
Jesus Christ. This made makes me sick. This happened, not only in my home state, within arms reach of my alma mater. The damned kids that go to OU will never realize the poverty and social problems that occur around them in that region of the state. They'll get their degree and jump ship without leaving any good mark on the south east.
 
2013-02-28 08:40:09 PM
 
2013-02-28 08:53:17 PM
He doesn't understand why she cares more sour her children than she cares about him?
 
2013-02-28 09:02:44 PM
I love how ignorant people were giving the photographer a bunch of shiat for not "intervening" in the assault.  Maybe she didn't want to get choked out too? She's a f*cking photographer, not a UFC fighter.
 
2013-02-28 09:12:21 PM
Holy shiat. Honestly the slideshow delay caused me to actually think about what as going on.

/why it's a little dusty in here all of a sudden
 
2013-02-28 09:24:04 PM
Wow.

I, uh... I'm gonna go hug my wife and kid now.
 
2013-02-28 09:24:39 PM

whistleridge: Deslidified


Thanks for that, I can finally see them
 
2013-02-28 09:25:38 PM
The thing that choked me up was the little girl trying to intervene and get in between the two.  No thought for herself, just trying to protect her mum.  Kids are capable of some pretty amazing stuff when they have to.
 
2013-02-28 09:31:09 PM
Maggie and Shane's courtship was brief but intense. Shane called her everyday from prison, and upon his release, they began to date.

timethemoment.files.wordpress.com
One month into their courtship, Shane had Maggie's name tattooed on his neck in large black letters.



I'm not a big fan of blaming the victim, but come on now.  This was hardly an unexpected development.
 
2013-02-28 09:36:35 PM
"I was fortunate that the responding officers were well educated on First Amendment laws and did not try to stop me from taking pictures".

I see the convict isn't the only one throwing punches in this article.
 
2013-02-28 09:48:49 PM

jim32rr: whistleridge: Deslidified

Thanks for that, I can finally see them


There really should be a standard Fark protocol now, where the admins deslide a link if the submitter doesn't. Or barring that, the first TFer to comment automatically deslides.
 
2013-02-28 09:51:26 PM
"Shane had been trying to make a career as a singer in a Christian rock band".

Now there's a good solid career plan, 'cause those guys are just swimming in money.
Especially the ones with prison tattoos. It makes them seem more... wholesome.
 
2013-02-28 09:56:39 PM

Aar1012: Jesus Christ. This made makes me sick. This happened, not only in my home state, within arms reach of my alma mater. The damned kids that go to OU will never realize the poverty and social problems that occur around them in that region of the state. They'll get their degree and jump ship without leaving any good mark on the south east.


Ohio is in the South East now? When did it move?
 
2013-02-28 10:06:50 PM
Cowardly shrimp dicked motherfarker needs to be beaten with a sack of doorknobs
 
2013-02-28 10:10:13 PM
Yep.  Horrific.  Glad she got out; hope she and her kids stay away from that poisonous shiat in the future.  That little girl trying to put herself between her mom and that man... telling her mom it would be okay... ugh.
 
2013-02-28 10:11:22 PM

TommyymmoT: "Shane had been trying to make a career as a singer in a Christian rock band".

Now there's a good solid career plan, 'cause those guys are just swimming in money.
Especially the ones with prison tattoos. It makes them seem more... wholesome.


It's the redemption thing. But yeah, not a good plan.
 
2013-02-28 10:11:29 PM
That was really hard to look at, so much so that I stopped and closed the window.  Then started again. Women where ever you are remember that these men are in jail for a reason do not go out with them.
 
2013-02-28 10:13:08 PM
Well that was brutal.
 
2013-02-28 10:14:08 PM
I spent almost two years getting protective orders for victims of domestic violence. I wish I could say this was a unique situation, but it isn't. It reads like a "worst of" the cases I handled. Isolating the victim from her family/support system, attaching at a time of weakness, ensuring that she believes that he can't be better without her, the tattoo (seen variations on this too many times, including a guy who came into court with a t shirt emblazoned with her picture and "i miss you" airbrushed on it).

And violence in front of the kids is the same as doing it TO The kids. The damage is incredible to their young  minds/psyches.
 
2013-02-28 10:14:23 PM
Kinda boring ... needs a Milkman, a priest, a 10 year old boy and his older brother BIlly.

/Already have the triple loser with some blue tattoos and a drunk temper that was easy to lose.
 
2013-02-28 10:14:27 PM
At least the someone called the cops and she left. Imagine shiat like that going on almost every night for years.
/I'm gonna go cry in a corner now.
 
2013-02-28 10:14:52 PM
Dysfunction Junction....what's your function?
 
2013-02-28 10:15:06 PM

TommyymmoT: "Shane had been trying to make a career as a singer in a Christian rock band".

Now there's a good solid career plan, 'cause those guys are just swimming in money.
Especially the ones with prison tattoos. It makes them seem more... wholesome.


That so completely ties into the whole idea of "I can't  make it without you, baby, you are the only one who understands me/can help me/redeem me" that I saw waaay too much of in the 280th.
 
2013-02-28 10:16:29 PM

A Terrible Human: At least the someone called the cops and she left. Imagine shiat like that going on almost every night for years.
/I'm gonna go cry in a corner now.


I was impressed as hell that the cops did that - and for those who are curious, that is, in part, what VAWA pays for - training police on how to handle these situations so help can happen BEFORE she/he has been beaten/stabbed/shot to death.

/still wish they'd change the name of the law
 
2013-02-28 10:17:00 PM

Bob Falfa: Aar1012: Jesus Christ. This made makes me sick. This happened, not only in my home state, within arms reach of my alma mater. The damned kids that go to OU will never realize the poverty and social problems that occur around them in that region of the state. They'll get their degree and jump ship without leaving any good mark on the south east.

Ohio is in the South East now? When did it move?


Just, you know, if you missed it.
 
2013-02-28 10:17:12 PM

Thisbymaster: That was really hard to look at, so much so that I stopped and closed the window.  Then started again. Women where ever you are remember that these men are in jail for a reason do not go out with them.


This.  Bad boys are not the answer.  The man with a healthy dose of Fark-It-All and the patience to let the goblins get close before stomping their guts out is the man you want.  Anybody can be a punk.  Not everybody can be a man.  Pick the man.
 
2013-02-28 10:18:58 PM
The incredible thing is that you think people are normal, but can never really tell.  If this family can fall apart, is anyone safe?

timethemoment.files.wordpress.com
 
2013-02-28 10:19:16 PM

Smeggy Smurf: Thisbymaster: That was really hard to look at, so much so that I stopped and closed the window.  Then started again. Women where ever you are remember that these men are in jail for a reason do not go out with them.

This.  Bad boys are not the answer.  The man with a healthy dose of Fark-It-All and the patience to let the goblins get close before stomping their guts out is the man you want.  Anybody can be a punk.  Not everybody can be a man.  Pick the man.


Don't make the mistake of assuming that "bad boys" are the only ones who commit violence. I've prosecuted pastors, law students, medical doctors, rich, poor, in-between.... this is an issue that crosses every societal barrier you care to name.

I actually worry that this will emphasize domestic violence as being a poor people problem, because it isn't
 
2013-02-28 10:19:41 PM

Bob Falfa: Aar1012: Jesus Christ. This made makes me sick. This happened, not only in my home state, within arms reach of my alma mater. The damned kids that go to OU will never realize the poverty and social problems that occur around them in that region of the state. They'll get their degree and jump ship without leaving any good mark on the south east.

Ohio is in the South East now? When did it move?


The OP (Bob) is talking about South Eastern Ohio. It's really part of the alleghenies and has most all of the same problems and benefits of living in places like eastern Kentucky or West Virginia.
 
2013-02-28 10:20:22 PM

whistleridge: Deslidified


Bless your heart.
 
2013-02-28 10:20:33 PM
People (women especially) think they can "save" the other person. We have all seen it before.  This woman was 19 and had 2 kids, so I doubt if it was raining men for her.  At least she had him arrested and pressed charges. If she had allowed him to talk her out of the arrest, she would have been on Fark long ago as another homicide.

That article was a tough read.


/I think it's time to pray for her and a better future.
 
2013-02-28 10:20:33 PM
Wow. Extremely hard to look at, especially if one were to be familiar with that territory.

Good to see someone getting out of something like that.

And that little girl is either going to be extremely farked up or extremely awesome. Maybe both.
 
2013-02-28 10:21:47 PM

serial_crusher: The incredible thing is that you think people are normal, but can never really tell.  If this family can fall apart, is anyone safe?

[timethemoment.files.wordpress.com image 735x490]


See just change out the guy and place but keep the same rage in it and that could be a picture of a childhood memory of mine. It's the rage,not the appearance.
 
2013-02-28 10:22:06 PM

moonscatter: I spent almost two years getting protective orders for victims of domestic violence. I wish I could say this was a unique situation, but it isn't. It reads like a "worst of" the cases I handled. Isolating the victim from her family/support system, attaching at a time of weakness, ensuring that she believes that he can't be better without her, the tattoo (seen variations on this too many times, including a guy who came into court with a t shirt emblazoned with her picture and "i miss you" airbrushed on it).

And violence in front of the kids is the same as doing it TO The kids. The damage is incredible to their young  minds/psyches.


I've done quite a few CPOs in my career as well.  It's almost a 50/50 split between this kind of heartbreaking stuff and people who want to file a BS pre-emptive strike for divorce purposes.  I wish I had photographic evidence like this in more cases.
 
2013-02-28 10:22:21 PM

TommyymmoT: "Shane had been trying to make a career as a singer in a Christian rock band".

Now there's a good solid career plan, 'cause those guys are just swimming in money.
Especially the ones with prison tattoos. It makes them seem more... wholesome.


"found jesus in prison" is probably a good schtick for a Christian rock musician.  There's a certain amount of their intended audience for whom that is true, but lazy parents might buy it for their kids as an attempt to combine Scared Straight with good old Christian values.
 
2013-02-28 10:23:13 PM

Aar1012: Jesus Christ. This made makes me sick. This happened, not only in my home state, within arms reach of my alma mater. The damned kids that go to OU will never realize the poverty and social problems that occur around them in that region of the state. They'll get their degree and jump ship without leaving any good mark on the south east.


Well, two points. 1) the photographer is a woman, submitter, and 2) she is a student at Ohio University, and so, judging by the reaction of this thread, is working on illuminating the poverty and social problems just outside the Athens city limits. There are students from OU who care and contribute to the community and its issues. And, admittedly, thousands who drink themselves silly on Court Street Thursday through Saturday.
 
2013-02-28 10:23:16 PM

what_now: He doesn't understand why she cares more sour her children than she cares about him?


Maggie would often say that she could sense the competition between Kayden and Shane

Should have been her first indication to run like hell.
 
2013-02-28 10:23:57 PM

NuttierThanEver: Cowardly shrimp dicked motherfarker needs to be beaten with a sack of doorknobs

 
2013-02-28 10:24:18 PM

Anderson's Pooper: moonscatter: I spent almost two years getting protective orders for victims of domestic violence. I wish I could say this was a unique situation, but it isn't. It reads like a "worst of" the cases I handled. Isolating the victim from her family/support system, attaching at a time of weakness, ensuring that she believes that he can't be better without her, the tattoo (seen variations on this too many times, including a guy who came into court with a t shirt emblazoned with her picture and "i miss you" airbrushed on it).

And violence in front of the kids is the same as doing it TO The kids. The damage is incredible to their young  minds/psyches.

I've done quite a few CPOs in my career as well.  It's almost a 50/50 split between this kind of heartbreaking stuff and people who want to file a BS pre-emptive strike for divorce purposes.  I wish I had photographic evidence like this in more cases.


Me, too.

Thankfully, we were very selective about the cases we took - and as part of the DA's office, we could not take any cases where a divorce action had been filed.

And omg yes on the photographs, although I could usually find enough idiocy  between text messages, facebook and twitter to make my point to the judge.

/the few cases that fell apart on testimony? I dismissed them right in front of the judge.
// too many people needed real help for me to mess around with people out for "revenge"
 
2013-02-28 10:24:47 PM
Young women LOVE men like this and they get what they deserve.  They reject the "nice" guy.  So, now she knows. Fark her.

The dude is an obvious scumbag.  A few more years of anal rape in prison will give him food for thought.

I have zero empathy for either one of these people.
 
KIA
2013-02-28 10:25:49 PM
Welcome to redneck America.  Oh, and... don't date felons or people who carry visible demonstrations of their inability to make good life choices.
 
2013-02-28 10:26:07 PM
Don't forget, ladies, he'll change for you. That nice guy at the office is just so boring and nerdy.
 
2013-02-28 10:26:43 PM
The guy is a cock, but I can't help be feel sorry for him as well. He's just too flat out stupid to control his emotions. It's not like he set out to be a terrible human being. Alcohol, lack of an education, unresolved emotional issues and just plain stupidity are a bad mixture.
 
2013-02-28 10:26:45 PM
That neck tattoo is the dumbest thing I've ever seen.
 
2013-02-28 10:26:52 PM
He looks like he masturbates to Nascar.
 
2013-02-28 10:27:04 PM
FTA : I intended to paint a portrait of the catch-22 of being a released ex-convict: even though they are physically free, the metaphorical prison of stigma doesn't allow them to truly escape.


Turns out the problem wasnt the stigma after all.
 
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