Candygram.

Good riddance...

Well, they probably only "opened fire" once.

FTA:  'He was still alive. He put his head up. We called him to swim over the rock to where we were.'
'He raised his hand up and then while he was rising his hand up we saw another attack and pull him in the water.
'He came back up. His head was on the water...then we notice he was already dead'

Holy bleepity, bleep BLEEP! That is straight out of a horror movie. I didn't even witness it but the image in my head makes me want to curl up in a ball and weep for my mommy.

Clearly this means we must hunt all sharks to Extinction, right?

/maybe not a good idea to look like a seal from the Sharks' point of view.

After RTFA, sounds like a pretty awful way to go. Not real good for the swimmer either.

/ Bummer for all involved.

Actually, he's just a dolphin.

It was a shark. It was a shark with a bite radius about a yard across.

Wanted for questioning:

If you gain their trust, great white sharks are actually quite docile.

Landshark?

I blame Peter Jackson.

AverageAmericanGuy: If you gain their trust, great white sharks are actually quite docile.

Hell of a step one there though.

stevie1der: AverageAmericanGuy: If you gain their trust, great white sharks are actually quite docile.

Hell of a step one there though.

Really. What if the Great White is just an asshole or has trust issues?

BronyMedic: Clearly this means we must hunt all sharks to Extinction, right?

feed this one to the shark next

stevie1der: AverageAmericanGuy: If you gain their trust, great white sharks are actually quite docile.

Hell of a step one there though.

Doesn't seem so hard. Here's some chick swimming with a white.

Also...

Shame all the sharks that will be killed over this. No snark, i think a dozen or so dead people is kind of a bargain compared with the massive amounts of sharks we harvest.

TNel: That's why I will not swim in the ocean.  Humans are not apex predators once we step foot into the water, screw it the sharks can have the water.

I know the odds of getting attacked are slim to none but that guy probably thought the same thing before he became dinner.  Just need to get the kids terrified of sharks and then I won't ever have to go the beach again (other than lakes of course, and then only  waist deep... damn phobias)

Bull Sharks and Greenland Sharks tolerate and hunt fresh water.  Have a nice bath.

Two16: [2.bp.blogspot.com image 400x179]

Well, this was no boat accident.

Friends said they would never meat a better chum.

TheGogmagog: Friends said they would never meat a better chum.

TOO SOON!

AverageAmericanGuy: stevie1der: AverageAmericanGuy: If you gain their trust, great white sharks are actually quite docile.

Hell of a step one there though.

Doesn't seem so hard. Here's some chick swimming with a white.

[www.nydailynews.com image 635x338]

He's probably thinking, "Guess I'll have carryout tonight..."

that boat does not look nearly big enough

AverageAmericanGuy: stevie1der: AverageAmericanGuy: If you gain their trust, great white sharks are actually quite docile.

Hell of a step one there though.

Doesn't seem so hard. Here's some chick swimming with a white.

[www.nydailynews.com image 635x338]

O sure, they're BFF's now, just wait until she gets a visit from her Aunt Flo.

Tanthalas39: Candygram.

Mrs. Arlen?  Mrs. Burling?

Meethos: Shame all the sharks that will be killed over this. No snark, i think a dozen or so dead people is kind of a bargain compared with the massive amounts of sharks we harvest.

If only there were some other way to avoid getting attacked by sharks....

impromptu complete-the-caption-contest:

"We're gonna need a bigger..."

MBooda: impromptu complete-the-caption-contest:

"We're gonna need a bigger..."

Plant Rights Activist: [i.dailymail.co.uk image 634x414]

that boat does not look nearly big enough

Neither do those guns.
Assault rifles aren't known for being very powerful.

/Guns VS things under water isn't the best situation to begin with.
/Bring a grenade.

Japanese submarine slammed two torpedoes into our side, chief. It was comin' back, from the island of Tinian to Laytee, just delivered the bomb. The Hiroshima bomb. Eleven hundred men went into the water. Vessel went down in twelve minutes. Didn't see the first shark for about a half an hour. Tiger. Thirteen footer. You know how you know that when you're in the water, chief? You tell by lookin' from the dorsal to the tail. What we didn't know... was our bomb mission had been so secret, no distress signal had been sent. Huh huh. They didn't even list us overdue for a week. Very first light, chief. The sharks come cruisin'. So we formed ourselves into tight groups. You know it's... kinda like ol' squares in battle like a, you see on a calendar, like the battle of Waterloo. And the idea was, the shark comes to the nearest man and that man, he'd start poundin' and hollerin' and screamin' and sometimes the shark would go away. Sometimes he wouldn't go away. Sometimes that shark, he looks right into you. Right into your eyes. You know the thing about a shark, he's got...lifeless eyes, black eyes, like a doll's eye. When he comes at ya, doesn't seem to be livin'. Until he bites ya and those black eyes roll over white. And then, ah then you hear that terrible high pitch screamin' and the ocean turns red and spite of all the poundin' and the hollerin' they all come in and rip you to pieces.

Y'know by the end of that first dawn, lost a hundred men! I don't know how many sharks, maybe a thousand! I don't know how many men, they averaged six an hour. On Thursday mornin' chief, I bumped into a friend of mine, Herbie Robinson from Cleveland. Baseball player, boson's mate. I thought he was asleep, reached over to wake him up. Bobbed up and down in the water, just like a kinda top. Up ended. Well... he'd been bitten in half below the waist. Noon the fifth day, Mr. Hooper, a Lockheed Ventura saw us, he swung in low and he saw us. He's a young pilot, a lot younger than Mr. Hooper, anyway he saw us and come in low. And three hours later a big fat PBY comes down and start to pick us up. You know that was the time I was most frightened? Waitin' for my turn. I'll never put on a lifejacket again. So, eleven hundred men went in the water, three hundred and sixteen men come out, the sharks took the rest, June the 29, 1945. Anyway, we delivered the bomb.

/sharks repeating

mhd: Landshark?
[i.imgur.com image 300x200]

dang, I haven't seen that picture in a loooong time.

thanks for the memory whip.