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(Liebert Publications Online)   First they came for the cigarettes, and I didn't speak out because I didn't smoke. Then they came for the alcohol, and I didn't speak out because I didn't drink. Then they came for the caffeine and I said I'LL FARKING CUT YOU   (online.liebertpub.com ) divider line
    More: Scary, First they came..., lethal doses, caffeinated beverages, poison control center, cigarettes, increased heart rate, lotions, Ehlers-Danlos syndrome  
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11957 clicks; posted to Main » on 26 Feb 2013 at 9:50 PM (3 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



Voting Results (Smartest)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

2013-02-26 11:09:59 PM  
3 votes:

ExpressPork: "How many must there be before we regulate?"

Liberalism at it's finest.



As soon as Republican Christian supremacists stop trying to regulate my farking uterus, then perhaps I can believe their whole farking "small government" bullshiat.
2013-02-26 10:16:43 PM  
3 votes:
s14.postimage.org
2013-02-26 09:58:04 PM  
3 votes:
This reminds me very much of the 'gum disease causes heart disease' BS that was floated around for a while.

Guess what. Oxygen is poisonous is large enough amounts. Drinking too much water too quickly will kill you.

I don't care if they want to study it, that's fine, but the breathiness and drama in that article are absurd.
2013-02-26 09:57:58 PM  
3 votes:
At first, I thought it was an Onion piece. To my horror, I was wrong. Remember when we used to laugh when we were told that the tobacco lawsuits would be followed by anti-caffeine crusades?
2013-02-26 10:49:04 PM  
2 votes:

omgwtfbbq69: Go ahead and pound another energy drink, imbibe your two pots of coffee a day.... nothing to see here.


Problem is certain 'energy' drinks are racing to see who can cram more caffeine into a liquid, and you've got people downing 2 or even 3 cans in an hour, who end up with more caffeine in their systems than you could ever possibly get from coffee. They're going to ruin caffeine for us all.
2013-02-26 10:39:20 PM  
2 votes:

tortilla burger: As someone who is getting a kick out of these replies, it would be hard to OD on caffeine. Like, really really hard. You'd have to be eating pure powdered caffeine by the spoonful to get anywhere near the levels required to do permanent damage to yourself. And it's not as if people take caffeine to get high, where there's a biochemical reward for ingesting more.


Gonna have to direct you here:  http://jcp.sagepub.com/content/7/3/131.extract
2013-02-26 10:29:58 PM  
2 votes:
2013-02-26 10:20:47 PM  
2 votes:

Cheesus: I've tried giving up caffeine.  I made it 3 weeks once.  Constant headaches and no energy at all.

/I farking need it


I successfully quit almost a year ago. The withrawal symptoms were intense. Now that I'm off it I use caffeine just for working out and it has a very strong effect. When I was addicted I just felt normal after taking caffeine. Now I feel high when I take it.
2013-02-26 10:18:53 PM  
2 votes:

omgwtfbbq69: I read the article.  Don't.  You'll never get that time back.  Just proves that there are a lot of people with PhD's out there that make up sh*t to worry about.  Go ahead and pound another energy drink, imbibe your two pots of coffee a day.... nothing to see here.



Or...there are people out there with Ph.Ds who still have personal agenda's to push and abuse the authority that a Ph.D should have in a given field to push said personal agenda.

When I was in high school I had a classmate who was a hardcore Mormon.  Being a friend of a member of my small group of friends, she ate lunch with us.  She also voiced her oppinions when any of us used salt, drank cafienated drinks, had a cup of coffee, or smoked in our own privately owned cars.  And when I say "voiced her oppinions" I mean "forced her beliefs upon us to the point where upon salting french fries, she would pick up the container of fries and throw them onto the floor, then explain how she's doing us a favor." (Since she was a female I couldn't deck her.  Thankfully, she was enough of a biatch that other women were more than happy to hit and kick her).  I have no doubt that someone like that with a Ph.D would twist a study filled with cherry picked results to push her own agenda, especially if it could lead to them being able to force their own agenda upon an entire nation.
2013-02-26 10:13:03 PM  
2 votes:
Of more than 2 million notifications received by the American National Poison Data System (NPDS) in 2011, 6,309 "case mentions" included caffeine. The majority of these involved other compounds, and cause of death attributable to caffeine was recorded in only one of a total of 1,995 poisons fatalities registered for that year.
*facepalm*
2013-02-26 09:57:38 PM  
2 votes:
I've tried giving up caffeine.  I made it 3 weeks once.  Constant headaches and no energy at all.

/I farking need it
2013-02-26 09:55:34 PM  
2 votes:
I drink coffee.  A lot.  Everyday.  I can't imagine living without it.

Caffeine supplements are bad.
2013-02-27 10:42:15 AM  
1 vote:

The Irresponsible Captain: Yeaaaaaaah. No.

[25.media.tumblr.com image 240x240]
It is by caffeine alone that I set my mind in motion.
It is by the beans of java that thoughts acquire speed.
Hands acquire shaking. The shaking becomes a warning.
It is by caffeine alone that I set my mind in motion.


oh goddammit, I should have read the thread first!

Glad to see somebody else from that long ago.  :-)
2013-02-27 06:09:19 AM  
1 vote:
Coffee dampens migraines. Yeah, I'm with subby.
2013-02-27 04:46:58 AM  
1 vote:

mbillips: One poorly designed study in an obscure journal is obscure and poorly designed. Coffee need fear not.


They published it in a "medical journal" that's more than likely funded by the authors, because they can't get it into one of the actual medical journals.

/IOW, call me when this is published in JAMA.
2013-02-27 01:50:21 AM  
1 vote:

Great Porn Dragon: Fine, they want to take the caffeine out of my coffee, motherfarkers can start paying the $50 a pop for my farking albuterol rescue-inhalers then.

(Seriously, caffeine and coffee are HELPFUL to us asthmatics--because coffee has theophylline which is a natural bronchodilator, and caffeine is ALSO a natural bronchodilator.  So is chocolate, for that matter, which contains theobromine which is a close chemical cousin to theophylline.  And yes, I HAVE on occasion nipped a Potential Asthma Flare Day in the bud with a nice strong bit of "trucker coffee" instead of breaking out the (rather considerably more expensive to the point I like to save that for BAD flares and exercise pre-treatment) albuterol rescue inhaler...to good effect, meaning I didn't HAVE to break out the rescue inhaler.)


I've noticed that caffiene really helps open up my sinuses. Nature's little vasoconstrictor. Black coffee works best, with the additional steaming mug action.
2013-02-27 01:14:58 AM  
1 vote:
Over my dead body!

When I had our store, we had these chocolate covered coffee beans that you would eat like candy.  I was our best customer.  Talk about a caffiene high!

Also had a farmer neighbor come plow my garden up one day.  I asked him if he wanted a cup of coffee.  He said, "I don't drink coffee, I chew it."  He then pulled out a skoal can full of coffee grounds and filled his bottom lip with it.
2013-02-27 12:20:19 AM  
1 vote:
I'm in the wrong thread

// needs more caffeine

// didn't acquire the taste for coffee (I guess I'm sensitive to bitterness so coffee always tasted like crap to me).

// tea doesn't have much caffeine

// mountain dew has too many calories (for the quantities I drank it in)

// solution ... cut out the middle man and go straight to caffeine pills

www.europadatafeed.com

BAM

200mg per pill, 100 pills per bottle, ~$5
2013-02-27 12:19:18 AM  
1 vote:
Obligamatory.

farm3.static.flickr.com
2013-02-27 12:18:27 AM  
1 vote:

Great Porn Dragon: Fine, they want to take the caffeine out of my coffee, motherfarkers can start paying the $50 a pop for my farking albuterol rescue-inhalers then.

Seriously, caffeine is HELPFUL to us asthmatics--

caffeine is a natural bronchodilator.


As a lifelong asthmatic, I can testify to caffeine being a natural bronchodilator, though for fark's sake I didn't learn about it, and quite by accident, until last year.  My first 30 years of asthma could only be treated with an injection from the emergency room followed by the nastiest of nuclear-green liquids taken at home, as this was before inhaled medicine, theophylline and albuterol were available.  Later, when modern bronchodilators and prednisone came along they really were miracle drugs, but I lost health insurance, so instead used over-the-counter Primatene mist and tablets.  When Primatene mist was pulled from the market last year, I was desperate and still with no health insurance.  Then happened to catch a movie where an asthmatic child was kidnapped, and she told her captor that caffeine in coffee would help her breathe better until she got her real medicine.  I tried it, and by golly it really did work.

Caffeine, if used early-on before an asthma attack becomes severe, can sometimes fend off the need for emergency nebulization and prescription meds.  However, asthmatics and COPD patients must always remember that caffeine is not strong enough to qualify as a genuine rescue med once lungs are in lock-down, that caffeine should never be relied on exclusively for severe attacks and that, at best, caffeine might buy a little time until access to serious medication and treatment is obtained.
2013-02-27 12:10:31 AM  
1 vote:

Great Janitor: omgwtfbbq69: I read the article.  Don't.  You'll never get that time back.  Just proves that there are a lot of people with PhD's out there that make up sh*t to worry about.  Go ahead and pound another energy drink, imbibe your two pots of coffee a day.... nothing to see here.


Or...there are people out there with Ph.Ds who still have personal agenda's to push and abuse the authority that a Ph.D should have in a given field to push said personal agenda.

When I was in high school I had a classmate who was a hardcore Mormon.  Being a friend of a member of my small group of friends, she ate lunch with us.  She also voiced her oppinions when any of us used salt, drank cafienated drinks, had a cup of coffee, or smoked in our own privately owned cars.  And when I say "voiced her oppinions" I mean "forced her beliefs upon us to the point where upon salting french fries, she would pick up the container of fries and throw them onto the floor, then explain how she's doing us a favor." (Since she was a female I couldn't deck her.  Thankfully, she was enough of a biatch that other women were more than happy to hit and kick her).  I have no doubt that someone like that with a Ph.D would twist a study filled with cherry picked results to push her own agenda, especially if it could lead to them being able to force their own agenda upon an entire nation.


I've known people like that, but never one who went nuts over  salt for fark's sake.

A while back, after a lot of hemming and hawing, I took up pipe smoking.  I could make all sorts of arguments about how I only do it occasionally or that it isn't as bad as cigarettes, but the simple fact is I know it isn't great for me but I enjoy doing it.  I find it relaxing.  Perhaps in fifty years I'll feel differently, but right now I'm ok with the fact that it is probably unhealthy.
2013-02-27 12:05:51 AM  
1 vote:

ExpressPork: "How many must there be before we regulate?"

Liberalism at it's finest.


So are you alleging that ANY regulation of substances marketed as consumable is bad, or just caffeine?
Because I'm left of left, and I think this caffeine thing is completely retarded.
2013-02-26 11:56:22 PM  
1 vote:
Coffee is lame. $4 for a cup of bean soup.
2013-02-26 11:43:50 PM  
1 vote:

Bbbbut I'm doing this  for your own good!
i224.photobucket.com

2013-02-26 11:31:38 PM  
1 vote:
If my morning coffee gets farking government regulated I swear I will walk through Times Square with a bloody machete and eat every single tourist alive. I will strangle someone if I can't have my 2 cups of coffee. I'm a girl but ill fark Bloombergs mom. I'll do it. He farking touches my coffee, I'll farking do it.
2013-02-26 11:23:51 PM  
1 vote:

OooShiny: ExpressPork: "How many must there be before we regulate?"

Liberalism at it's finest.


As soon as Republican Christian supremacists stop trying to regulate my farking uterus, then perhaps I can believe their whole farking "small government" bullshiat.


i.imgur.com
2013-02-26 11:08:18 PM  
1 vote:
Actually, first they came for the alcohol. It didn't go too well.
2013-02-26 10:58:53 PM  
1 vote:
this talk of coffee got me wanting a cup.

i try to point out to folks who want to ban energy drinks because someone died:
if you make it illegal for minors to purchase the energy drinks they will find a way just like beer and smokes.
if you regulate it, you are going to have your coffee and soft drinks regulated (not to mention those nice cold glasses of sweet tea in the summer)
and granted, it is sad that someone died after drinking the stuff, but, the cans do say not intended for children.
AND weren't all of these incidents (or a good part of them) linked to an existing condition that ingesting copious amounts of caffeine would only aggravate?
2013-02-26 10:54:33 PM  
1 vote:
Yeaaaaaaah. No.

25.media.tumblr.com
It is by caffeine alone that I set my mind in motion.
It is by the beans of java that thoughts acquire speed.
Hands acquire shaking. The shaking becomes a warning.
It is by caffeine alone that I set my mind in motion.
2013-02-26 10:38:22 PM  
1 vote:
www.keurig.com

we just bought one of these.  i have two cups in the morning before I head off to work then I will usually drink about three to four cups at work but also drink plenty of water between cups as well due to the diuretic effect.  I also love the occasional bottle of Dr. Pepper.  I don't do the monsters five hours and the like.  I have tried to stop drinking coffee before and yes caffeine is a drug and you do have withdrawals, but a cup of coffee and a cigarette in the morning are pretty damn good if you ask me.  Wife said, "oh it's just the energy drinks they are targeting"  had to explain about the FDA.  She isn't too happy now either since she loves her some donut house coffee in the morning as well.

/how long before we are relegated to buying coffee from some shady individual in a dark alley?
2013-02-26 10:35:55 PM  
1 vote:
I don't use caffeine at all, because every once in a while, I really, really need it.

One time, I had to stay awake for 4 days at a go.  Starting the end of day 1, I was averaging 200mg every hour, for about 3 days.  By day 4, I was simultaneously twitching from all the caffeine, and lurching when I walked from the tiredness, so that I looked like a zombie with Parkinsons.  Had a really nasty headache too.

/Also, never understood the point of coffee.  Both times I've tried it, one sip burned all the tastebuds off my tongue and I couldn't taste anything for 3 days.
2013-02-26 10:32:13 PM  
1 vote:

cman: Isnt it considerably easier to die with swallowing pills than dying from a caffeine overdose?


CSB Time:

As a teenager, I did my share of stupid things. One of which was to take about 3/4 a box of caffeine pills at once on a dare. I did not go to the hospital (probably should have), but spent about 8 delirious heart racing hours on the family living room couch covered in my own vomit, too nauseous to move. Parents were out of town and I caught hell for puking on the couch when they got home. Said I caught a stomach bug. Mom bought it, but dad thought I had gotten drunk and hungover. I wish.

Good times.
2013-02-26 10:26:50 PM  
1 vote:
I'd quit heroin before I quit caffeine.
2013-02-26 10:24:23 PM  
1 vote:
So, this isn't about coffee, but the massive amounts of caffiene in diet pills, isn't it?

//Oh, cookies beeped.
2013-02-26 10:20:20 PM  
1 vote:

omgwtfbbq69: I read the article.  Don't.  You'll never get that time back.  Just proves that there are a lot of people with PhD's out there that make up sh*t to worry about.  Go ahead and pound another energy drink, imbibe your two pots of coffee a day.... nothing to see here.


I read the article, and have a Ph.D. (not in caffeine studies, though), so I'm getting a kick.

This sounds to me like a study that tried to identify the safe limits of a chemical beyond which bad things happen.

The article is pretty poorly written, but at least it does toss in embarrassing cop-outs like "Notwithstanding the obvious need for further research" and "Although the anecdotal nature of some of the evidence and the general paucity of systematic data preclude firm conclusions"... and they seem to be saying some people are taking megadoses of caffeine pills to commit suicide. Similar to controlling the sale of pseudephedrine, they note that reducing the quantity of caffeine pills that one can purchase at a pop seems to be an effective approach for reducing suicides.

/all that said, my Ph.D. is in Computer Science, so there's that
2013-02-26 10:19:51 PM  
1 vote:
Don't worry, Bloomberg is working on it.
2013-02-26 10:19:30 PM  
1 vote:
I will likely never quit coffee, so you can pry it from my cold dead hands.
2013-02-26 10:19:01 PM  
1 vote:
saeco-kavegepek.com

No you don't!
2013-02-26 10:18:24 PM  
1 vote:
If you'll notice, it's from Iceland. Who have already banned porn and are considering banning internet porn. So banning or regulating caffeine for being too useful wouldn't be a huge surprise.
2013-02-26 10:17:16 PM  
1 vote:

andychrist420: pots


I drink a little over a liter a day.  French press a big pot in the morning, put it in carafe, have great coffee till it's gone sometime around 1400
2013-02-26 10:12:14 PM  
1 vote:
"How many must there be before we regulate?"

Liberalism at it's finest.
2013-02-26 10:10:02 PM  
1 vote:

Cheesus: I've tried giving up caffeine.  I made it 3 weeks once.  Constant headaches and no energy at all.

/I farking need it


That's a way worse physiological reaction than I had when I quit smoking. Of course, I was unsuccessful.
2013-02-26 10:04:25 PM  
1 vote:
I read the article.  Don't.  You'll never get that time back.  Just proves that there are a lot of people with PhD's out there that make up sh*t to worry about.  Go ahead and pound another energy drink, imbibe your two pots of coffee a day.... nothing to see here.
2013-02-26 10:02:45 PM  
1 vote:
One poorly designed study in an obscure journal is obscure and poorly designed. Coffee need fear not.
2013-02-26 09:59:16 PM  
1 vote:
Bloomberg is reading this...  And smiling....


// They came for the large sodas, and I did nothing....
2013-02-26 09:57:44 PM  
1 vote:
I drink 2 pots of coffee a day.  Shouldn't I be dead?
2013-02-26 09:52:50 PM  
1 vote:
DRTFA, but loving the headline.
2013-02-26 09:11:42 PM  
1 vote:
I can only imagine it's like to work at the Journal of Caffeine Research.
2013-02-26 09:11:17 PM  
1 vote:
I'LL FARKING CUT YOU,  BIATCH!

You left that off, subbs.
 
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