FARK.com: (7613808) Okay, based on the greenlit thread of the ten most common strip club songs, what would the absolute WORST song to request at a strip club?

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		Okay, based on the greenlit thread of the ten most common strip club songs, what would the absolute WORST song to request at a strip club? (fark.com)		677
		More: Survey, Sarah McLachlan, SPCA, Tropicana, The Wiggles

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7233 clicks; posted to Main » on 26 Feb 2013 at 2:41 PM | Favorite | share:

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hej		2013-02-26 06:21:42 PM

Lola

megarian		2013-02-26 06:21:45 PM

thecpt: megarian: N.E.R.D - Lapdance

Completely counterproductive.

NERD - all the girls standing in the line for the bathroom

weirdest. dance. ever.

"my lap is wet. not sure if grossed out but flattered, or just grossed out."

...

You have to wonder sometimes...

Purell EVERYTHING!

Molavian		2013-02-26 06:21:51 PM

The_Sponge: The #1 Answer:

Christmas Shoes

Yes, that's the one.

Banned on the Run		2013-02-26 06:22:10 PM

"The Wrong Way" by Sublime

plc5_250		2013-02-26 06:22:55 PM

Sad Eyes by Robert John

Yeah, I am late to the thread - sorry.

Four Flushed on the Flop		2013-02-26 06:23:54 PM

IrieTom: Yakety Sax

Doesn't count. We've watched strippers running around to that song for decades on Benny Hill.

dustygrimp		2013-02-26 06:24:24 PM

"If" - Bread
"Leader of the Band" - Dan Fogelberg
"Photographs and Memories" - Jim Croce
"Fire & Rain" - James Taylor

ravenlore		2013-02-26 06:24:38 PM

The Real Folk Blues?

(I'd tip for awesomeness, but prolly not great for actual stripping)

digitalrain		2013-02-26 06:24:40 PM

Suicide is Painless (the MASH theme)

or

The sad walking away song from Incredible Hulk

unfarkingbelievable		2013-02-26 06:26:55 PM

Crap! So much true brilliant wit (kinda typical for FARK) for me to choose. I have been LMAO the entire thread down, saying, "Yes, THIS!" to nearly everything.

You people humble me. And I love so many of you because of it. truth.

Ryder79		2013-02-26 06:27:35 PM

Anything by Richard Cheese

megarian		2013-02-26 06:27:37 PM

Molavian: The_Sponge: The #1 Answer:

Christmas Shoes

Yes, that's the one.

^^^^^^^^

Slam1263		2013-02-26 06:27:47 PM

spcMike: Just once I want a lap dance to O Fortuna

The Acropolis in PDX?

/ok, nitpicker, milwaukee

JayR30		2013-02-26 06:28:07 PM

Dance with my Father-Luther Vandross
Papa Don't Preach-Madonna
God-Prince

Ryder79		2013-02-26 06:28:36 PM

More specifically, "Me So Horny" by Richard Cheese. EPIC

Fano		2013-02-26 06:28:42 PM

Cat's in the Cradle

SultanofSchwing		2013-02-26 06:28:43 PM

Stan Bush - You Got the Touch

thecpt		2013-02-26 06:29:11 PM

ravenlore: The Real Folk Blues?

(I'd tip for awesomeness, but prolly not great for actual stripping)

it'd probably be better than tank! I'd imagine limbs would tear off during that dance

dustygrimp		2013-02-26 06:29:18 PM

Anything by Red Peters

Fano		2013-02-26 06:29:40 PM

Barnacle Bill the Sailor

olddinosaur		2013-02-26 06:29:59 PM

Anything by Neil Young.

earthworm2.0		2013-02-26 06:30:57 PM

The whisper song (wait til you see my d*ck) by the Yin Yang twins.

shoemakerb		2013-02-26 06:30:57 PM

Everybody's said almost everything I've thought of, but I would suggest that good nudity would make any song bearable.

When I was about 16, I got into a carnival girl show, which was about the only place you could see girls dance completely nude in those days. They evidently paid someone off to work extra "strong" and hell, nobody believes me when I tell this part of the story anyway, but they were drop dead gorgeous, no silicone, and sat on the faces of the guys standing at the edge of the platform (hey, it was the 70s, and no, I wasn't one of them).

Anyhow, to this day I remember the music they used, and compared to the original article on what gets played today, VERY out of place:

All Right Now by Free
D'yer Mak'er by Led Zeppelin (actually not too terrible for bumping and grinding), and worst of all,
You're My Best Friend by Queen, and
Don't Stop by Fleetwood Mac!

I guess when you're sampling the vag of a stereotypical "farmer's daughter," any music would be tolerated!

Paris1127		2013-02-26 06:31:09 PM

Pomp and Circumstance
Sabre Dance
Flight of the Bumblebee
Pictures at an Exhibition
This one...
And of course, for a Farker we all know, this song...

Fano		2013-02-26 06:31:30 PM

Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious

Anything from Sound of Music

The_Sponge		2013-02-26 06:32:02 PM

Ryder79: Anything by Richard Cheese

Whoa....let's not say things we can't take back.

tunafishbrain		2013-02-26 06:32:29 PM

That's My Job - Conway Twitty

Ryder79		2013-02-26 06:32:36 PM

"The Streak" by Ray Stevens. Hell, ANYTHING by Ray Stevens, really.....

Pollexter		2013-02-26 06:32:38 PM

Fancy by Reba McEntire

jamspoon		2013-02-26 06:33:37 PM

America by Yes

Widor's Toccata on a church organ

I Kill Children by the Dead Kennedys

12349876		2013-02-26 06:33:59 PM

Most people here are going by lyrics, but I'd go for some free jazz or crazy prog stuff that would impossible for your average stripper to find the rhythm.

ReapTheChaos		2013-02-26 06:34:09 PM

The Toadies: Possum Kingdom

ciberido		2013-02-26 06:34:19 PM

JerseyTim: "Maps" by the Yeah Yeah Yeahs

media.rhizome.org

Everywhere like such as.

Ryder79		2013-02-26 06:34:28 PM

The_Sponge: Ryder79: Anything by Richard Cheese

Whoa....let's not say things we can't take back.

I regret nothing....Richard Freakin' Cheese

savethenaugs		2013-02-26 06:34:56 PM

megarian:

Oh wow...thank you for that gift...

We're snowed in. Much appreciated.

try this one. Mighty strange video too. It is even topical since you are snowed in.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JIYKPjalb6Q

Four Flushed on the Flop		2013-02-26 06:35:22 PM

Anything by Everyone!

/should cover them all.....

ciberido		2013-02-26 06:36:33 PM

Trivia Jockey: I_Am_Weasel: Trivia Jockey: "Cat's in the Cradle" by Harry Chapin

Not 30,000 Pounds Of Bananas?

How about "Convoy"?

I was going for the "I miss my children" vibe.

Lucille by Kenny Rogers?

Fano		2013-02-26 06:36:53 PM

Dammit, should have read the thread before posting.

Powerhouse by Raymond Scott

Solid State Vittles		2013-02-26 06:37:23 PM

"What Child is This?"

megarian		2013-02-26 06:38:01 PM

savethenaugs: megarian:

Oh wow...thank you for that gift...

We're snowed in. Much appreciated.

try this one. Mighty strange video too. It is even topical since you are snowed in.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JIYKPjalb6Q

Great. Now I want a tropical beverage with an umbrella.

*puts festive swizzle stick in Bells Teo Hearted ale* close enough.

ravenlore		2013-02-26 06:38:22 PM

ReapTheChaos: The Toadies: Possum Kingdom

I'd...rather like watching that actually.

Solid State Vittles		2013-02-26 06:38:24 PM

"Dear God" XTC

Smackledorfer		2013-02-26 06:38:28 PM

The_Sponge: But a lap dance is so much better when the stripper is crying.

That's what I came to the thread for.

Fano		2013-02-26 06:38:54 PM

Greensleeves

Solid State Vittles		2013-02-26 06:40:07 PM

"Girlfriend in a Coma" the Smiths

WhippingBoy		2013-02-26 06:40:15 PM

"Teddy Bear" by Red Sovine

TrollingForColumbine		2013-02-26 06:40:33 PM

MaMa Tried

12349876		2013-02-26 06:41:25 PM

:in the arms of an angel" by Sarah McLaughlin. With the ASPCA commercial on the TVs.

Solid State Vittles		2013-02-26 06:41:35 PM

"Lonely" Tom Waits

thecpt		2013-02-26 06:41:47 PM

savethenaugs: megarian:

Oh wow...thank you for that gift...

We're snowed in. Much appreciated.

try this one. Mighty strange video too. It is even topical since you are snowed in.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JIYKPjalb6Q

I love these kinds of songs:
dynamite hack - boys in the hood originally Easy E

obadiah parker - Hey Ya originally Outkast
and there's always biatches ain't shiat.

/don't mind me, just bored waiting for things at work.

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