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(The Blaze)   You can go to church and pray, but if you use the name Jesus, we'll sue   (theblaze.com) divider line 75
    More: Asinine, Jesus Christ, Jesus Surfed  
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11646 clicks; posted to Main » on 26 Feb 2013 at 1:59 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



75 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2013-02-26 01:26:45 PM
Wouldnt Prior Art make that patent invalid?
 
2013-02-26 01:31:50 PM
The amount of ass kicking that Biblical Jesus would do if he found out that these assholes were fighting legal battles over who gets to profit off his name would be epic to behold.

Guess it's too bad he doesn't exist.
 
2013-02-26 01:34:21 PM

exick: The amount of ass kicking that Biblical Jesus would do if he found out that these assholes were fighting legal battles over who gets to profit off his name would be epic to behold.

Guess it's too bad he doesn't exist.


Random statement, but, has anyone else noticed the phonetic similarity betwixt Jesus and Zeus?
 
2013-02-26 01:42:05 PM
When businesses do stupid shiat to each other (and us), the dumbest person in the room is the one complaining that the government didn't stop them.

The company did what it did on purpose, man.
 
2013-02-26 01:45:27 PM
There's a whole lot of gardeners in trouble
 
2013-02-26 01:53:34 PM

exick: The amount of ass kicking that Biblical Jesus would do if he found out that these assholes were fighting legal battles over who gets to profit off his name would be epic to behold.

Guess it's too bad he doesn't exist.


If he doesn't exist then why is his middle initial H?
 
2013-02-26 02:00:58 PM

Elzar: exick: The amount of ass kicking that Biblical Jesus would do if he found out that these assholes were fighting legal battles over who gets to profit off his name would be epic to behold.

Guess it's too bad he doesn't exist.

If he doesn't exist then why is his middle initial H?


I'm pretty sure it's F.
 
2013-02-26 02:02:30 PM

cman: Wouldnt Prior Art make that patent invalid?


Only for a line of sandals.
 
2013-02-26 02:04:25 PM

exick: The amount of ass kicking that Biblical Jesus would do if he found out that these assholes were fighting legal battles over who gets to profit off his name would be epic to behold. Guess it's too bad he doesn't exist.


imageshack.us
 
2013-02-26 02:05:10 PM
l rem in LA MOMA gift shop there was a range of "pills" produced by Jesus Had A Sister - things like 'Take one of these and you can fly a 747' type gags
 
2013-02-26 02:06:22 PM
The Blaze? You want us to give them page clicks? EABOD.
 
2013-02-26 02:08:29 PM

cman: Random statement, but, has anyone else noticed the phonetic similarity betwixt Jesus and Zeus?


Especially in Spanish..
 
2013-02-26 02:09:03 PM

TofuTheAlmighty: The Blaze? You want us to give them page clicks? EABOD.


I'd never heard of the site before, but I feel so farking dirty for having gone there.
 
2013-02-26 02:09:51 PM
Who owns the trademark, then?
 
2013-02-26 02:09:59 PM
bobcargill.files.wordpress.com

I guess we can expand that to the marketers, shysters, hucksters, and generally the various snake oil salesmen profiting off of his name.
 
2013-02-26 02:10:03 PM

cman: exick: The amount of ass kicking that Biblical Jesus would do if he found out that these assholes were fighting legal battles over who gets to profit off his name would be epic to behold.

Guess it's too bad he doesn't exist.

Random statement, but, has anyone else noticed the phonetic similarity betwixt Jesus and Zeus?


Zeus came from  Dyeus.

But I doubt Yeshua came from the same place seeing as how one it's Semitic and Zeus is Indo-European.
 
2013-02-26 02:11:04 PM
On JesusSurfed.com, he sells t-shirts, hoodies and bandannas that show Jesus Christ holding a surfboard under a palm tree (these images coincide with Anton's belief that if Jesus were alive today, he'd be a surfer).

That's a hellbound way to start your business. Using the Lord's name in vain, serving Mammon, and knowingly basing your enterprise around a violation of the commandment against bearing false witness.
 
2013-02-26 02:11:28 PM

Dr Dreidel: Who owns the trademark, then?


Ministry?
 
2013-02-26 02:11:30 PM
Regardless of all the specific derp surrounding this particular story, trademark and patent law needs some serious fine tuning.
 
2013-02-26 02:12:43 PM

cman: exick: The amount of ass kicking that Biblical Jesus would do if he found out that these assholes were fighting legal battles over who gets to profit off his name would be epic to behold.

Guess it's too bad he doesn't exist.

Random statement, but, has anyone else noticed the phonetic similarity betwixt Jesus and Zeus?


encrypted-tbn3.gstatic.com

Why do you keep calling him Jesus? Does he look Puetro Rican to you?
 
2013-02-26 02:14:24 PM

cman: Random statement, but, has anyone else noticed the phonetic similarity betwixt Jesus and Zeus?


images2.wikia.nocookie.net
 
2013-02-26 02:16:56 PM

WhoopAssWayne: exick: The amount of ass kicking that Biblical Jesus would do if he found out that these assholes were fighting legal battles over who gets to profit off his name would be epic to behold. Guess it's too bad he doesn't exist.

[imageshack.us image 399x599]


Not a fan of dreadlocks because of their resemblance to cat-vomit / hairballs and weird, weird smell, but that chick is pretty damn hot. Have those hair turds clipped, bathe her, put some Neil Young on the HiFi, and bring her for me to anoint.
 
2013-02-26 02:17:15 PM
Oh farking wow.

img35.imageshack.us
 
2013-02-26 02:17:31 PM

SN1987a goes boom: cman: exick: The amount of ass kicking that Biblical Jesus would do if he found out that these assholes were fighting legal battles over who gets to profit off his name would be epic to behold.

Guess it's too bad he doesn't exist.

Random statement, but, has anyone else noticed the phonetic similarity betwixt Jesus and Zeus?

[encrypted-tbn3.gstatic.com image 345x146]

Why do you keep calling him Jesus? Does he look Puetro Rican to you?


Too slow I lose.
 
2013-02-26 02:18:01 PM
Not sure he's wearing jeans...

cdn.gunaxin.com
 
2013-02-26 02:18:34 PM
I clicked on the link not knowing what the site was and then up from the bowels of the hell of my company's browser popped a picture of Glen Beck.

Subby, I hope you die.
 
2013-02-26 02:25:04 PM

SlagginOff: I clicked on the link not knowing what the site was and then up from the bowels of the hell of my company's browser popped a picture of Glen Beck.

Subby, I hope you die.


Not even AB+ saved me. Now my day has been ruined by Beck's smarm, which somehow manages to ooze even over tcp/ip.
 
2013-02-26 02:25:34 PM

jigger: cman: exick: The amount of ass kicking that Biblical Jesus would do if he found out that these assholes were fighting legal battles over who gets to profit off his name would be epic to behold.

Guess it's too bad he doesn't exist.

Random statement, but, has anyone else noticed the phonetic similarity betwixt Jesus and Zeus?

Zeus came from  Dyeus.

But I doubt Yeshua came from the same place seeing as how one it's Semitic and Zeus is Indo-European.


However, Ἰησοῦς ("Iēsous") is Greek, which is definitely Indo-European.
 
2013-02-26 02:26:59 PM

SlagginOff: I clicked on the link not knowing what the site was and then up from the bowels of the hell of my company's browser popped a picture of Glen Beck.

Subby, I hope you die.


I believe that Beck is trying to get the "Blaze" channel onto regular cable etc.  I'm a little concerned because I can tell when I look at my TV and that strange orange man is trying to explain why our government no longer represents us that America really is THAT stupid.
 
2013-02-26 02:29:03 PM

meat0918: [bobcargill.files.wordpress.com image 604x456]

I guess we can expand that to the marketers, shysters, hucksters, and generally the various snake oil salesmen profiting off of his name.


Religion of Peace right? Jesus is so peaceful until he gets all righteous angery - then its ok to be violent...
 
2013-02-26 02:29:07 PM

puckrock2000: owever, Ἰησοῦς ("Iēsous") is Greek, which is definitely Indo-European.


Yeah, but it's just a greekification of the Hebrew, and Iesus is a Latinization of the Greek, and Jesus is just a gringoification of the Latin.

/IANALanguageScholar
 
2013-02-26 02:29:56 PM

cman: Wouldnt Prior Art make that patent invalid?



It would, but the same company also trademarked the words "prior" and "art".

And don't try fighting them in court, because they also trademarked "sue", "suit", "lawsuit", "damages", "infringe" and "frivolous".
 
2013-02-26 02:31:29 PM

cman: exick: The amount of ass kicking that Biblical Jesus would do if he found out that these assholes were fighting legal battles over who gets to profit off his name would be epic to behold.

Guess it's too bad he doesn't exist.

Random statement, but, has anyone else noticed the phonetic similarity betwixt Jesus and Zeus?



Yeah.

In fact, the Spanish pronunciation of "Jesus" is "Hey-Zeus".
 
vpb [TotalFark]
2013-02-26 02:33:42 PM

Raharu: Oh farking wow.

[img35.imageshack.us image 800x423]


They made one specifically for Christie?
 
2013-02-26 02:38:31 PM

vpb: Raharu: Oh farking wow.

[img35.imageshack.us image 800x423]

They made one specifically for Christie?


Just went back... didn't see that there.
 
2013-02-26 02:53:46 PM

dualplains: TofuTheAlmighty: The Blaze? You want us to give them page clicks? EABOD.

I'd never heard of the site before, but I feel so farking dirty for having gone there.


The Glenn Beck pop-up ad didn't help.
 
2013-02-26 02:55:37 PM

cman: Random statement, but, has anyone else noticed the phonetic similarity betwixt Jesus and Zeus?


"Jee-zuhss"

"Zooss"

Nope, not seeing any similarity whatsoever.
 
2013-02-26 02:57:24 PM
Blog sites that I avoid clicking from here:
Daily KOS, The Blaze, Daily Caller, Little Green Footballs, WorldNet Daily, and I'll occasionally give National Review Online a click but I always regret it.

Am I missing anything?  I doubt it.
 
2013-02-26 02:57:44 PM

cman: exick: The amount of ass kicking that Biblical Jesus would do if he found out that these assholes were fighting legal battles over who gets to profit off his name would be epic to behold.

Guess it's too bad he doesn't exist.

Random statement, but, has anyone else noticed the phonetic similarity betwixt Jesus and Zeus?


If you pronouce Jesus in Spanish it comes out as:  "Hey Zeus"
 
2013-02-26 02:58:10 PM

Raharu: Oh farking wow.

[img35.imageshack.us image 800x423]


I didn't realize you needed coffins for a mass grave.
 
2013-02-26 03:00:17 PM

Vodka Zombie: I didn't realize you needed coffins for a mass grave


You can fit a dozen or so in one of those guys, and then the ground doesn't settle as much with decomposition, resulting in less obvious gravesites on Google Maps.
 
2013-02-26 03:00:38 PM
"How anyone can claim the name Jesus for themselves and put a trademark on it is beyond me," said Jeff Lamont.
and isn't just what the yahoo from the states is trying to do
 
2013-02-26 03:03:10 PM

factoryconnection: Blog sites that I avoid clicking from here:
Daily KOS, The Blaze, Daily Caller, Little Green Footballs, WorldNet Daily, and I'll occasionally give National Review Online a click but I always regret it.

Am I missing anything?  I doubt it.


Little Green Footballs has mostly centered itself after initially going off the derp end. This should be obvious by reason of the fact that they're almost extinct around here now. Not enough clickthroughs-to-buy-Drew-beer flame bait anymore.

If you're dodging lefty wharrgarbl as well, include Think Progress to your list alongside Daily Kos.
 
2013-02-26 03:05:32 PM

meat0918: [bobcargill.files.wordpress.com image 604x456]

I guess we can expand that to the marketers, shysters, hucksters, and generally the various snake oil salesmen profiting off of his name.


Jesus Rocks
24.media.tumblr.com
 
2013-02-26 03:06:51 PM

TheGogmagog: meat0918: [bobcargill.files.wordpress.com image 604x456]

I guess we can expand that to the marketers, shysters, hucksters, and generally the various snake oil salesmen profiting off of his name.

Jesus Rocks
[24.media.tumblr.com image 450x562]


Rocks? Nah. Jesus is just all right by me.
 
2013-02-26 03:08:48 PM

MaudlinMutantMollusk: There's a whole lot of gardeners in trouble


No kidding. A friend of mine actually has a groundskeeper named Jesus. He's married to her housekeeper, Maria. It takes a lot of self control not to giggle when I go out there and see either one of them.
 
2013-02-26 03:15:51 PM
That whole...you know...swipe thing?  Up then down, left then right, across the chest?

PATENTED, man.
 
2013-02-26 03:28:48 PM
encrypted-tbn3.gstatic.com

/but Esposito scores on the rebound
 
2013-02-26 03:46:35 PM

cman: exick: The amount of ass kicking that Biblical Jesus would do if he found out that these assholes were fighting legal battles over who gets to profit off his name would be epic to behold.

Guess it's too bad he doesn't exist.

Random statement, but, has anyone else noticed the phonetic similarity betwixt Jesus and Zeus?


err, yea sorta kinda
the greeks who called him that

Je Sus (of Zeus) aka - the son of god

// Bullshiat religion has bullshiat foundations
/ who knew ?!?
 
2013-02-26 03:47:31 PM

jigger: cman: exick: The amount of ass kicking that Biblical Jesus would do if he found out that these assholes were fighting legal battles over who gets to profit off his name would be epic to behold.

Guess it's too bad he doesn't exist.

Random statement, but, has anyone else noticed the phonetic similarity betwixt Jesus and Zeus?

Zeus came from  Dyeus.

But I doubt Yeshua came from the same place seeing as how one it's Semitic and Zeus is Indo-European.


Jesus, son of god, born of a mortal woman, going around helping people, performing miracles... hes basically a wussy version of Hercules/Heracles. I mean, picture Jesus... then picture an emaciated Kevin Sorbo with a beard.

And yeah, Glenn Beck popup? Not cool. Wish we could blacklist certain sites on fark...
 
2013-02-26 03:50:17 PM

TofuTheAlmighty: The Blaze? You want us to give them page clicks? EABOD.


Sigh....

Thank Jesus for userscripts....

/adds another one to the black list...
 
2013-02-26 03:52:22 PM

WhoopAssWayne: exick: The amount of ass kicking that Biblical Jesus would do if he found out that these assholes were fighting legal battles over who gets to profit off his name would be epic to behold. Guess it's too bad he doesn't exist.


imageshack.us

That looks like Daniel Radcliffe in dreadlocks.

encrypted-tbn2.gstatic.com

The Snow Dog: WhoopAssWayne: exick:
Not a fan of dreadlocks because of their resemblance to cat-vomit / hairballs and weird, weird smell, but that chick is pretty damn hot. Have those hair turds clipped, bathe her, put some Neil Young on the HiFi, and bring her for me to anoint.



Which makes your comment hilarious if it were him,

/NTTAWWT
 
2013-02-26 04:01:13 PM
Can we please link directly to the WSJ?

Apparently Glenn Beck's website is just another crappy repost blog and he definitely doesn't need anymore hits.

http://online.wsj.com/article/SB1000142412788732443200457830206056050 1 092.html
 
2013-02-26 04:02:13 PM

cfreak: Can we please link directly to the WSJ?

Apparently Glenn Beck's website is just another crappy repost blog and he definitely doesn't need anymore hits.

http://online.wsj.com/article/SB1000142412788732443200457830206056050 1 092.html


Well ... total failure there.
 
2013-02-26 04:08:52 PM
3.bp.blogspot.com
Bobblehead Muhammed
I'm OK with this.
Muhammed  Mini skirts, bikinis?. (For women, not men or goats)
 
2013-02-26 04:24:01 PM
Oh,that's beck's blog?

No wonder there are so many wackos on there defending the Reedemer's right to exist. From one: "When he comes back, he isn't going to be a baby in a manger!"
 
2013-02-26 04:39:16 PM

cfreak: cfreak: Can we please link directly to the WSJ?

Apparently Glenn Beck's website is just another crappy repost blog and he definitely doesn't need anymore hits.

http://online.wsj.com/article/SB100014241278873244320045783020605605 0 1 092.html

Well ... total failure there.



See the s p a c e s in the URL?

1. copy
2. Paste
3. Remove the spaces


/WSJ HATES Fark
//Or is it the other way-round?
///Farking 1%'ers
 
2013-02-26 04:42:48 PM

incendi: Vodka Zombie: I didn't realize you needed coffins for a mass grave

You can fit a dozen or so in one of those guys, and then the ground doesn't settle as much with decomposition, resulting in less obvious gravesites on Google Maps.


Wow. That Obama kid is pretty smart. I didn't think about the earth settling.

It's too bad that we have such a stigma about incineration. Sure, you'd lose the quality fertilizer a decomposing human produces, but from a cleanliness standpoint, it's hard to beat cremation.
 
2013-02-26 04:54:24 PM

factoryconnection: Blog sites that I avoid clicking from here:
Daily KOS, The Blaze, Daily Caller, Little Green Footballs, WorldNet Daily, and I'll occasionally give National Review Online a click but I always regret it.

Am I missing anything?  I doubt it.


Breitbart and Free Republic.
 
2013-02-26 05:21:59 PM

MacWizard: factoryconnection: Blog sites that I avoid clicking from here:
Daily KOS, The Blaze, Daily Caller, Little Green Footballs, WorldNet Daily, and I'll occasionally give National Review Online a click but I always regret it.

Am I missing anything?  I doubt it.

Breitbart and Free Republic.


Town Hall & American "Thinker."
 
2013-02-26 06:00:57 PM

rufus-t-firefly: MacWizard: factoryconnection: Blog sites that I avoid clicking from here:
Daily KOS, The Blaze, Daily Caller, Little Green Footballs, WorldNet Daily, and I'll occasionally give National Review Online a click but I always regret it.

Am I missing anything?  I doubt it.

Breitbart and Free Republic.

Town Hall & American "Thinker."


American Thinker is always worth a click. They're the kind of people who mistake the Onion for real journalism, while publishing articles the Onion might mistake for satire. I'll gladly lend my eyeballs to keep such a hilarious place open for business. I mean, look, I don't support bioterrorism, but I'll buy a spray can of fake dog poo.
 
2013-02-26 07:11:40 PM

The Snow Dog: Regardless of all the specific derp surrounding this particular story, trademark and patent law needs some serious fine tuning.


This.

But just for fun, d'ya think they'd let anyone trademark the name of Muhammed to sell beachwear or jeans...before they got their shops exploded?

farking ridiculous. Revoke the trademark and don't let anyone have it; it's obscene, regardless of whose faith you're trying to trademark and make money off of (I have a problem with televangelists too, so I'm not limiting myself to being annoyed with these idiots).
 
2013-02-26 07:15:15 PM
Buddy Christ?  He's way friendlier.
 
2013-02-26 07:15:44 PM
WhoopAssWayne:

[imageshack.us image 399x599]

I don't think there's nearly as much crossover between crunchy homeopathic hippies and bitter mocking atheists as your macro implies.
 
2013-02-26 07:17:02 PM

rufus-t-firefly: MacWizard: factoryconnection: Blog sites that I avoid clicking from here:
Daily KOS, The Blaze, Daily Caller, Little Green Footballs, WorldNet Daily, and I'll occasionally give National Review Online a click but I always regret it.

Am I missing anything?  I doubt it.

Breitbart and Free Republic.

Town Hall & American "Thinker."


Fox News Nation.
 
2013-02-26 07:20:00 PM

incendi: puckrock2000: owever, Ἰησοῦς ("Iēsous") is Greek, which is definitely Indo-European.

Yeah, but it's just a greekification of the Hebrew, and Iesus is a Latinization of the Greek, and Jesus is just a gringoification of the Latin.

/IANALanguageScholar


Perhaps not, but you are correct. Some get into semantics and demand one or the other be used, but they mean--literally--the same thing.

/did a lot of study of ancient Hebrew and Greek when I was younger and in bible college
//don't care about the semantics--if God knows the thoughts and intents of the heart (I believe He does), then he certainly knows to whom you are referring, regardless of your spoken language
 
2013-02-26 07:26:43 PM

cman: Wouldnt Prior Art make that patent invalid?


This is a trademark registration not a patent so prior art is irrelevant. Trademark registrations, muthafarker, understand them.
 
2013-02-26 07:41:48 PM

tarheel07: dualplains: TofuTheAlmighty: The Blaze? You want us to give them page clicks? EABOD.

I'd never heard of the site before, but I feel so farking dirty for having gone there.

The Glenn Beck pop-up ad didn't help.


Yep. I'm glad I saw that pop-up. Now I know to never click on a The Blaze link again.
 
2013-02-26 08:53:34 PM

cman: exick: The amount of ass kicking that Biblical Jesus would do if he found out that these assholes were fighting legal battles over who gets to profit off his name would be epic to behold.

Guess it's too bad he doesn't exist.

Random statement, but, has anyone else noticed the phonetic similarity betwixt Jesus and Zeus?


And Amadeus!
 
2013-02-26 08:56:41 PM
Dammit...mad at myself for clicking the link.

I knew about "The Blaze"...I just wasn't paying attention. By the by...if you have cable/satellite tv you soon may be paying more than just attention to "The Blaze" as good ole Glenn is pressing several systems to make his channel  part of their line up. So, whether you watch it or not...you will still be paying for it!

I won't click the link here or elsewhere again.

I urge folks to let their providers not to include "The Blaze" in their channel line up.
 
2013-02-26 09:09:03 PM
I couldn't help it.

I read the comments.

The Blaze commenters say Jesus wouldn't be a liberal.

Christ Almighty indeed.
 
2013-02-26 10:08:33 PM

cman: exick: The amount of ass kicking that Biblical Jesus would do if he found out that these assholes were fighting legal battles over who gets to profit off his name would be epic to behold.

Guess it's too bad he doesn't exist.

Random statement, but, has anyone else noticed the phonetic similarity betwixt Jesus and Zeus?


Yep.  I noticed that when I was a little kid and wondered about it.  Also wondered if we went to Heaven if we coud still sin.  Wouldn't God forgiving the Devil and welcoming him and his angels back be the ultimate act of forgiveness?
 
2013-02-26 10:44:49 PM
Bong hits 4 Jesus!
 
2013-02-27 09:41:37 AM
these images coincide with Anton's belief that if Jesus were alive today, he'd be a surfer

I remember that show!

www.metroactive.com
 
2013-02-27 06:25:48 PM

factoryconnection: Blog sites that I avoid clicking from here:
Daily KOS, The Blaze, Daily Caller, Little Green Footballs,


You mean currently? LGF was one of the right-wingers that rebelled during the Palin Fiasco and converted to Moderateism.

Maybe your no-go list is trying to avoid bias entirely, but it seems pretty rational as far as political blogs go.
 
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