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(The Smoking Gun)   During his time inside the store, "(He) proceeded to try on female lingerie and experiment with sex toys for approximately two hours"   (thesmokinggun.com) divider line 27
    More: Sick, female lingerie, Dr. John, Old English, experiments  
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27 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2013-02-25 05:42:18 PM  
Unlocked door at 4 a.m. and nobody around to assist a customer.  That's a firin'.
 
2013-02-25 05:51:43 PM  
Patton Oswalt has really hit the skids
i.cdn.turner.com
 
2013-02-25 05:59:07 PM  

BarkingUnicorn: Unlocked door at 4 a.m. and nobody around to assist a customer.  That's a firin'.


So would that even be "breaking and entering" as TSG asserts? Seems like tresspassing, vandalism and grand theft more than B&E. Then again B&E could be one of those charges that doesn't really exist outside of TV and movies...
 
2013-02-25 06:02:41 PM  

milsorgen: BarkingUnicorn: Unlocked door at 4 a.m. and nobody around to assist a customer.  That's a firin'.

So would that even be "breaking and entering" as TSG asserts? Seems like tresspassing, vandalism and grand theft more than B&E. Then again B&E could be one of those charges that doesn't really exist outside of TV and movies...


breaking and entering

n. 1) the criminal act of entering a residence or other enclosed property through the slightest amount of force (even pushing open a door), without authorization. If there is intent to commit a crime, this is burglary. If there is no such intent, the breaking and entering alone is probably at least illegal trespass, which is a misdemeanor crime. 2) the criminal charge for the above.
 
2013-02-25 06:14:51 PM  

BarkingUnicorn: milsorgen: BarkingUnicorn: Unlocked door at 4 a.m. and nobody around to assist a customer.  That's a firin'.

So would that even be "breaking and entering" as TSG asserts? Seems like tresspassing, vandalism and grand theft more than B&E. Then again B&E could be one of those charges that doesn't really exist outside of TV and movies...

breaking and entering

n. 1) the criminal act of entering a residence or other enclosed property through the slightest amount of force (even pushing open a door), without authorization. If there is intent to commit a crime, this is burglary. If there is no such intent, the breaking and entering alone is probably at least illegal trespass, which is a misdemeanor crime. 2) the criminal charge for the above.


TIL.... Still think the business should forfeit restitution (at least partially) for not securing the premises.
 
2013-02-25 07:57:43 PM  

milsorgen: BarkingUnicorn: Unlocked door at 4 a.m. and nobody around to assist a customer.  That's a firin'.

So would that even be "breaking and entering" as TSG asserts? Seems like tresspassing, vandalism and grand theft more than B&E. Then again B&E could be one of those charges that doesn't really exist outside of TV and movies...


The video shows his starfish cherry being broken and entered.
 
2013-02-25 07:58:12 PM  
Aw come on! Who hasn't been there before, amirite? If I had a dime....
 
2013-02-25 07:59:16 PM  

radiovox: Aw come on! Who hasn't been there before, amirite? If I had a dime....


cft;ls
 
2013-02-25 07:59:34 PM  
Time for new furniture! 1/2 off slightly used Toys!
 
2013-02-25 08:01:01 PM  
Am I just experiencing deja vu or has this story already been posted on Fark?
 
2013-02-25 08:02:00 PM  
Dad?
 
2013-02-25 08:02:57 PM  
Read that as "proceeded to cry on female lingerie"
 
2013-02-25 08:02:58 PM  
Living the dream....
 
2013-02-25 08:06:10 PM  

jimpoz: Read that as "proceeded to cry on female lingerie"


oh boy, been there, done that.  but who hasn't, right?  right?  guys?  hey guys, where's everybody goin?!?
 
2013-02-25 08:06:35 PM  
You know they just rinsed those things off and put them back on the shelf.  Hopefully they rinsed them off first.
 
2013-02-25 08:07:48 PM  
Subby missed his opportunity to increase the clicks.  He should have left off the "(he)"
 
2013-02-25 08:08:35 PM  
it's good to have hobbies
 
2013-02-25 08:14:23 PM  
I have the store video of the 2 hours, but haven't figured out which eBay category to use.
 
2013-02-25 08:14:38 PM  

caddisfly: You know they just rinsed those things off and put them back on the shelf.  Hopefully they rinsed them off first.


In a perfect world sex toys would be like armor in WoW, Bind on Equip, however the world being what it is we would be lucky if the clerk glanced at  a sink on her way to put the aforementioned toys back on the shelf...
 
2013-02-25 08:14:56 PM  
Made me think of this.  Jim Jeffries coke wank.  NOT SAFE FOR WORK
 
2013-02-25 08:16:28 PM  
proves that all fatties are psychotic
 
2013-02-25 08:22:59 PM  
Can't believe he passed up the male lingerie.
 
2013-02-25 08:25:15 PM  
They forgot to mention the part about him submitting an advice thread about it on Fark.
 
2013-02-25 08:26:41 PM  
No matter what they charge him with, or how much he has to pay in fines, he'll always have that one magical night to remember!
 
2013-02-25 08:30:23 PM  
Alright, which of you TFer's was it?
 
2013-02-25 08:35:36 PM  
Again?
 
2013-02-25 08:40:44 PM  
Mea Culpa, fellow farkers.
 
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