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(Newser)   Warning to all Florida residents: Be sure to express your love in an Earth-friendly way. A 40-year-old man faces up to five years in prison because of 12 heart-shaped balloons   (newser.com) divider line 32
    More: Florida, warnings, Earth, environmental crimes, Anthony Brasfield, prisons  
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2013-02-25 02:46:45 PM
There goes my plan of carpet bombin Florida with condoms.
 
2013-02-25 02:47:28 PM
When I was in elementary school, we had several mass balloon launches.

What have I done?
 
2013-02-25 02:47:33 PM

Clock Spider Jerusalem: There goes my plan of carpet bombin Florida with condoms.


Spring Break?
 
2013-02-25 02:48:34 PM
i105.photobucket.com
Knows that feel, bro.
 
2013-02-25 02:48:38 PM
This seems like a bit of a dick move. Would it have been too much to pull the guy aside and tell him about the endangered birds or lecturing him and writing a ticket?
 
2013-02-25 02:48:39 PM
He did it again?
 
2013-02-25 02:48:40 PM
Oh man, he is totally going to go away for 12 years. Yep, that is absolutely going to happen. There is no doubt in my mind that this man will serve jail time. 100% sure on it. I am totally not being sarcastic either. Not at all.
 
2013-02-25 02:49:21 PM

Kraftwerk Orange: When I was in elementary school, we had several mass balloon launches.

What have I done?


Probably killed some turtles who ate your deflated balloons as they floated on the ocean because they thought it was a jelly fish. There is a special shlef in hell just for you turtle killer!
 
2013-02-25 02:50:30 PM
Releasing a dozen red balloons for valentine's day - romantic

Staying at Motel 6 for valentine's day - not romantic

/we'll leave the light on for ya.
 
2013-02-25 02:51:05 PM
Hi Pete, this is my friend, repeat.
 
2013-02-25 02:51:32 PM

Kraftwerk Orange: When I was in elementary school, we had several mass balloon launches.

What have I done?


You set off a computer warning system and started WWIII...
 
2013-02-25 02:51:48 PM
Did Pete lease those balloons?
 
2013-02-25 02:51:50 PM

Shvetz: Oh man, he is totally going to go away for 12 years. Yep, that is absolutely going to happen. There is no doubt in my mind that this man will serve jail time. 100% sure on it. I am totally not being sarcastic either. Not at all.


Dont forget they will have to let out a super violent criminal because they'll need the bed space for this eco-terrorist
 
2013-02-25 02:52:27 PM
Felony charge? Jeez, that's pretty stiff. I wonder if the guy gave the trooper some bad attitude? Seems like the kind of thing where a warning would have been sufficient. This being Florida, however, maybe the guy should consider himself lucky that he wasn't shot.
 
2013-02-25 02:53:17 PM

Grandemadaca: Releasing a dozen red balloons for valentine's day - romantic

Staying at Motel 6 for valentine's day - not romantic

/we'll leave the light on for ya.


Better than the back seat of a Hyundai.

/Humm, maybe not
 
2013-02-25 02:53:54 PM

Atomic Spunk: Felony charge? Jeez, that's pretty stiff. I wonder if the guy gave the trooper some bad attitude? Seems like the kind of thing where a warning would have been sufficient. This being Florida, however, maybe the guy should consider himself lucky that he wasn't shot.


For all we know, the trooper could have just told the guy "Hey man, you're not supposed to do that, but since it's valentine's day, no biggy..." and the man said "fark YOU PIG!!!!"
 
2013-02-25 02:54:02 PM

redmid17: This seems like a bit of a dick move. Would it have been too much to pull the guy aside and tell him about the endangered birds or lecturing him and writing a ticket?


Thats what I was thinking...give him a ticket for littering or something. You'd be hard pressed to get me to convict the guy of a felony if I was on the jury.
 
2013-02-25 02:54:13 PM

MattyBlast: He did it again?


Relax... it's just deju vu all over again.  Nothing to see here... again.
 
2013-02-25 02:54:46 PM
i26.photobucket.com
Do what now?
 
2013-02-25 02:55:44 PM
From the comments:

=====
DougMasters

1 hour, 41 minutes ago"the reality was that a Florida Highway Patrol trooper was watching too, and deemed the act an environmental crime." Dick.
======


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Can I do two out of the three?
 
2013-02-25 02:56:12 PM
USA USA USA!
 
2013-02-25 02:56:23 PM
Talk about a jilted cop, also I highly doubt the prosecutor will pursue this.
 
2013-02-25 02:56:49 PM
Imagine the penalty if he had released 99 of them.
 
2013-02-25 02:56:49 PM

stonicus: Atomic Spunk: Felony charge? Jeez, that's pretty stiff. I wonder if the guy gave the trooper some bad attitude? Seems like the kind of thing where a warning would have been sufficient. This being Florida, however, maybe the guy should consider himself lucky that he wasn't shot.

For all we know, the trooper could have just told the guy "Hey man, you're not supposed to do that, but since it's valentine's day, no biggy..." and the man said "fark YOU PIG!!!!"


We certainly don't know that that isn't the case, but I'm not inclined to give benefit of the doubt to cops with regard to them being level-headed.  Based on general police  behavior, it seems way more likely that this cop was power-tripping and looking for trouble.
 
2013-02-25 02:57:41 PM
Wasting our helium reserves, a crime, the culprit:  The government
 
2013-02-25 02:57:51 PM

FloydA: [i105.photobucket.com image 300x453]
Knows that feel, bro.


wow she's still looking good. Wonder if she ever shaved her pits?
 
2013-02-25 02:58:56 PM
Unsurprising.  The henpecking from the bureaucrats never ends.  You have to do something to protect your job when your produce nothing and have no real value to society.
 
2013-02-25 02:59:53 PM
Given that the asshole trooper charged him with "polluting to harm animals" I think he will get acquitted.

Got to love that some Trooper's self-righteousness is so strong that he chose the harshest charges, but he forgot these charges require provable intent. And I don't think any prosecuter can argue that this guy released the balloons because he actively wanted to harm wildlife.

The trooper should have just given him a ticket for littering and let it go.
 
2013-02-25 03:01:03 PM

darklingscribe: Given that the asshole trooper charged him with "polluting to harm animals" I think he will get acquitted.

Got to love that some Trooper's self-righteousness is so strong that he chose the harshest charges, but he forgot these charges require provable intent. And I don't think any prosecuter can argue that this guy released the balloons because he actively wanted to harm wildlife.

The trooper should have just given him a ticket for littering and let it go.


Is it even littering until it lands?
 
2013-02-25 03:03:56 PM
Hang the cop and anybody that goes forward with this.
 
2013-02-25 03:07:00 PM
When I was a kid, my step-dad bought my step-mom two dozen helium filled hearts.  Unfortunately, my step-mom was having sex with the air conditioning repair guy when he arrived to give them to her.  He stormed off to get drunk while she and Mr. Freon Penis went to dinner.

I figured I'd put the balloons to use, so I tied them to our Shih Tzu's collar and let her go in the living room, which had a twenty foot ceiling.  And a ceiling fan.  The dog floated straight up in a half a second.  The fan smashed the balloons, whipping the little dog this way and that.  Then one of the strings finally caught and the whole mess sucked into the fan motor, twisting the collar around the dog's neck.  I just stood there, open mouthed, staring up at the wreck, dog piss raining down.  After a few minutes, she stopped squirming and went limp.

Luckily, my step parents were so mad at each other, that they'd just storm through the house, slamming doors and yelling, never looking up.  That was June, so by Christmas, most of the organic parts had dripped off the skeleton.  They were so sorry about basically ignoring me that I got a Sega handheld and a bunch of games.  Say what you will about troubled homes, but sometimes all that strive pays off in the end.
 
2013-02-25 04:33:37 PM

stonicus: darklingscribe: Given that the asshole trooper charged him with "polluting to harm animals" I think he will get acquitted.

Got to love that some Trooper's self-righteousness is so strong that he chose the harshest charges, but he forgot these charges require provable intent. And I don't think any prosecuter can argue that this guy released the balloons because he actively wanted to harm wildlife.

The trooper should have just given him a ticket for littering and let it go.

Is it even littering until it lands?


Littering and?
 
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