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(Onion AV Club)   Ted Nugent... Gahhhh, just click and read   (avclub.com) divider line 142
    More: Unlikely, Ted Nugent, B.B. King, Masters Tournament, Black Jews, black community  
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14094 clicks; posted to Entertainment » on 22 Feb 2013 at 4:59 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-02-22 03:30:32 PM
Noted black leader Ted Nugent launches "Black Power" tour, to empower black people

If he really does this, it will be the LOL fest of the year. Do it, Ted: do it!
 
2013-02-22 03:32:57 PM
Isn't that asshole dead YET?

/c'mon, pantsloader... your time is running out
 
2013-02-22 04:02:50 PM
I....uh....wait.....huh? I don't get it.
 
2013-02-22 04:04:48 PM

MaudlinMutantMollusk: Isn't that asshole dead YET?

/c'mon, pantsloader... your time is running out


It's pretty obvious he's asking to get shot.

www.addictinginfo.org
 
2013-02-22 04:05:50 PM

Voiceofreason01: I....uh....wait.....huh? I don't get it.


Ted's intellect is too far beyond us. We have no more hope of understanding him than a cat understands a man doing calculus.
 
2013-02-22 04:11:28 PM
Maybe Ted can make like the  Nation of Islam founder and disappear.
 
vpb [TotalFark]
2013-02-22 04:38:55 PM
Well, the Persians united the Greeks.  Maybe he can do the same for Blacks.
 
2013-02-22 05:01:33 PM
I think Ted's deer meat was a little too gamey.
 
2013-02-22 05:02:50 PM
Well if he's so black, maybe he will finally feel comfortable enough to go to  Libertarian wonderland in Somalia.
 
2013-02-22 05:04:03 PM
Will this tour be stopping at the Watts district of L.A.? 10 to 1 he wouldn't make it out without the help of an ambulance crew.

/Come on Ted, nut up or shut up!
 
2013-02-22 05:06:39 PM
i.imgur.com
 
2013-02-22 05:07:19 PM
Wait. Are we sure the Onion A.V. Club isn't also satire?
 
2013-02-22 05:08:50 PM
content8.flixster.com
 
2013-02-22 05:09:26 PM
DId this guy use a lot of drugs or was it a head injury?
 
2013-02-22 05:09:51 PM

Skyrmion: Wait. Are we sure the Onion A.V. Club isn't also satire?


Only if WND is as well, as they link to his actual article on there.  Although, that would make a lot of people feel better if everyone on WND came out as just being satirical.
 
2013-02-22 05:16:24 PM

Clock Spider Jerusalem: DId this guy use a lot of drugs or was it a head injury?


To his credit, he's strongly anti-drug, and claims to have only ever had 2 beers. Moral: Syphilis is a biatch.
 
2013-02-22 05:16:28 PM
I cant even tell what's satire and what isn't anymore...
 
2013-02-22 05:17:04 PM

Krieghund: MaudlinMutantMollusk: Isn't that asshole dead YET?

/c'mon, pantsloader... your time is running out

It's pretty obvious he's asking to get shot.

[www.addictinginfo.org image 325x220]


Is that Eartha Kitt?
 
2013-02-22 05:17:11 PM
Wow, that's ... interesting.

Keep on going with this "minority outreach," GOP. It's bound to pay off!

/for Dems
 
2013-02-22 05:17:18 PM

Clock Spider Jerusalem: DId this guy use a lot of drugs or was it a head injury?


He claims to have never done drugs, so I'm guess it was from the methane fumes from two weeks worth of Too Crazy To Be Drafted quality fecal matter in his pants.
 
2013-02-22 05:17:30 PM
"Cat Scratch Fever" sucked and his career catapulted into a brick wall. He hasn't been relevant since 1977 and there's a difference between your fame as a musician and your outlandish behavior towards Democrats. Why isn't this asshole dead yet?
 
2013-02-22 05:18:00 PM

astro716: Clock Spider Jerusalem: DId this guy use a lot of drugs or was it a head injury?

To his credit, he's strongly anti-drug, and claims to have only ever had 2 beers. Moral: Syphilis is a biatch.


So he's all natural crazy. He's screwed.
 
2013-02-22 05:18:46 PM
Isn't that asshole dead YET?

He promised that he would be if Obama won.  Now he's reneging.
 
2013-02-22 05:19:40 PM
OK, it's from The Onion, but it's AV Club...is this for farking real?!?!

Goddamn you, Poe.
 
2013-02-22 05:22:48 PM

Skyrmion: Wait. Are we sure the Onion A.V. Club isn't also satire?


It most certainly is "satire," in the sense that it is "a prose composition, in which prevailing vices or follies are held up to ridicule." More specifically, it is journalism ("Ted Nugent is naming his upcoming tour 'Black Power'") reported with a satirical edge, pointing out that despite his claims to the contrary, Ted Nugent lacks sensitivity to racial issues. But simply because something is presented in a satirical way doesn't mean it's fictitious (fictitious satire usually takes on the form of parody, and this article is certainly not parody).
 
2013-02-22 05:23:46 PM
 
2013-02-22 05:25:35 PM

astro716: Clock Spider Jerusalem: DId this guy use a lot of drugs or was it a head injury?

To his credit, he's strongly anti-drug, and claims to have only ever had 2 beers. Moral: Syphilis is a biatch.


I don't see that as a credit.  I'm pro-drug.
 
2013-02-22 05:26:46 PM
Satire is supposed to be funny.
 
2013-02-22 05:28:29 PM

ThrnPhl: Here's the same story on Rolling Stone.


Wait....was that not satire?!?!?!
 
2013-02-22 05:29:44 PM

ThrnPhl: Here's the same story on Rolling Stone.


i.imgur.com
 
2013-02-22 05:30:42 PM
So will it end up like this scene in Die Hard 3 with Willis in the ghetto without Samuel L Jackson coming to save the day?

/wouldn't let me post the picture
 
2013-02-22 05:30:55 PM
Some people only troll the internet.

Ted trolls real life.
 
2013-02-22 05:33:52 PM

Nonrepeating Rotating Binary: Some people only troll the internet.

Ted trolls real life.


That is funny.  Well played.
 
2013-02-22 05:33:55 PM
What would be great is if we could resurrect all his black musical heroes just so they could tell Ted his music sucks and to go to hell.
 
2013-02-22 05:34:04 PM
The Nuge:  Now smarter than Barack Obama.

No, seriously.  Stop laughing.  Stop.  STAHP!
 
2013-02-22 05:34:14 PM

Rapmaster2000: astro716: Clock Spider Jerusalem: DId this guy use a lot of drugs or was it a head injury?

To his credit, he's strongly anti-drug, and claims to have only ever had 2 beers. Moral: Syphilis is a biatch.

I don't see that as a credit.  I'm pro-drug.


Seeing Ted's antics; if teetotaling does this to you, I'm waaaaay Pro-drug.


/maybe if he got the right kind of meds, he'd be a productive member of society
 
2013-02-22 05:37:15 PM
I love sober white men. Sooo funny.
 
2013-02-22 05:38:57 PM
I can see it now.  Not a single solitary black person will show up for any of his shows, and he'll get to claim they're the real racists.
 
2013-02-22 05:39:21 PM

OhioUGrad: So will it end up like this scene in Die Hard 3 with Willis in the ghetto without Samuel L Jackson coming to save the day?

/wouldn't let me post the picture


encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com

Ted is about to have a very bad day.
 
2013-02-22 05:40:15 PM

Because People in power are Stupid: Well if he's so black, maybe he will finally feel comfortable enough to go to Libertarian wonderland in Somalia.


Bonus for him--he already knows what to do when there are no toilets handy.
 
2013-02-22 05:41:35 PM

H31N0US: I love sober white men. Sooo funny.


Ted has never had a drug or a drink in his life. As a kid, the way he got high was spinning in circles on the lawn until he fell to the ground from dizziness, this according to him.  I'm not sure that is a healthy alternative to drugs or alcohol.
 
2013-02-22 05:41:39 PM
Because the best person to choose if you are interested in minority outreach is Ted Nugent...yessah.
 
2013-02-22 05:43:33 PM

riverwalk barfly: H31N0US: I love sober white men. Sooo funny.

Ted has never had a drug or a drink in his life. As a kid, the way he got high was spinning in circles on the lawn until he fell to the ground from dizziness, this according to him.  I'm not sure that is a healthy alternative to drugs or alcohol.


It's true. John Drake, original lead singer for the Amboy Dukes confirmed it to me personally that Ted never did drugs back when they were in the band together. He was a pussyhound, but didn't get stoned. Ever.
 
2013-02-22 05:44:20 PM
Do most black people even know who Ted Nugent is?
 
2013-02-22 05:46:37 PM

Dr.Zom: Do most black people even know who Ted Nugent is?


FTFY.
 
2013-02-22 05:47:24 PM
IT'S A TRAP!
 
2013-02-22 05:47:26 PM
Damn, shoulda put Teddy on the deadpool list for this year. Though if Ted wants to donate some of his proceeds to improving music education in primarily black school districts, more power to him.

/[puts the Nuge on next year's deadpool candidate list]
 
2013-02-22 05:48:58 PM

DubyaHater: "Cat Scratch Fever" sucked and his career catapulted into a brick wall. He hasn't been relevant since 1977 and there's a difference between your fame as a musician and your outlandish behavior towards Democrats. Why isn't this asshole dead yet?


Because hand raised deer aren't likely to charge you're pants shiatting ass when you're ten feet away with a bow.
 
2013-02-22 05:49:41 PM

SN1987a goes boom: OhioUGrad: So will it end up like this scene in Die Hard 3 with Willis in the ghetto without Samuel L Jackson coming to save the day?

/wouldn't let me post the picture

[encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com image 256x192]

Ted is about to have a very bad day.


Lets hope so

/had a picture of Willis which is probably why it wouldn't post, with what he had written on his sandwich board
 
2013-02-22 05:50:37 PM

germ78: Damn, shoulda put Teddy on the deadpool list for this year. Though if Ted wants to donate some of his proceeds to improving music education in primarily black school districts, more power to him.

/[puts the Nuge on next year's deadpool candidate list]


53 days

http://teddeadorinjail.com/
 
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