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(Nerve)   Your great-grandma's sex toy looked like a cake mixer   (nerve.com) divider line 87
    More: Weird, female sexuality  
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16239 clicks; posted to Main » on 22 Feb 2013 at 7:39 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-02-22 09:06:38 PM
Fark, you're slipping

blog.timesunion.com
 
2013-02-22 09:13:01 PM

jso2897: And did it also smell of elderberries?


Hamsters!
 
2013-02-22 09:20:24 PM

flyinglizard: jso2897: And did it also smell of elderberries?

Hamsters!


Not tuna?
 
2013-02-22 09:21:33 PM
Does this cake taste funny to anybody else?


Happy birthday.
 
2013-02-22 09:21:51 PM

Walosi: Oh. My. God. My grandmother had one of those.  My cousin and I used to play with it.


Go on...
 
2013-02-22 09:27:24 PM

treecologist: Grandma, and PJ Soles.

[www.hollywoodchicago.com image 365x345]


also:

farm9.staticflickr.com
 
2013-02-22 09:36:24 PM
FTFA: ... vibrators stopped looking so much like common household appliances and started resembling what they truly are: tools to make us come.

I really think in this context you might as well just go ahead and spell it "cum."
 
2013-02-22 09:40:20 PM
Me-ma was a bit more hardcore.
www.old-woodworking-tools.net
 
2013-02-22 09:46:16 PM
2.bp.blogspot.com
 
2013-02-22 10:01:22 PM

DS1970: Yeah, right...my finger looks like a cake mixer, does it?


You fingered your great grandmother?
 
2013-02-22 10:02:25 PM
MrEricSir: Grounding? In antique electronics? Oh wait, you're serious. I'd laugh, but I'm too busy being electrocuted by a vibrator up my butt.

This actually exists: Erostek ET302R electro-ejaculator:

www.washingtoncitypaper.com

Per the article, this can be attached to a uh... insertion device... which can then be inserted into an orifice.
 
2013-02-22 10:14:39 PM

orclover: fappomatic: According to my mother, her mother's sex toy WAS a mixer.

farking machines dot com.............cake mixer sex toy............all i'm going to say.


It's not everyday that I see something new on the internet.

\just saw something new on the internet
 
2013-02-22 10:23:39 PM
Relevant to this thread's interests

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hysteria_(2011_film)
 
2013-02-22 10:32:30 PM

Clock Spider Jerusalem: gunther_bumpass: albuquerquehalsey: aspAddict: BarkingUnicorn: My Mom had one of these.  I used the cup attachment on my elbows; it gave me funny feelings.

[www.nerve.com image 600x463]

My mom had one very similar to this...I used to use the bottom left attachment on my scalp, because the farking box SAID "for use on scalp." Now that I know this device's TRUE purpose, I am going to need a LOT of therapy.

And shampoo.

Damn you, internet...

[www.nerve.com image 600x581]

What the phark is the name of the color of the plastic appliances in the 70's were made of? Sandstone? Light Ochre?

Almond.

Popular shades of appliances in the 1970s were bad avocado, carrot puke, poop brown, and jaundice beige.


Don't forget Harvest Gold, or babysh*t yellow as I refer to it.
 
2013-02-22 10:34:12 PM
My mom has one that she actually uses for her back. At least, I hope so - she's always offering to use it on me...
 
2013-02-22 10:59:16 PM
My grandmother was a simple farm girl and didn't need fancy gadgets

i-cdn.apartmenttherapy.com
 
2013-02-22 11:00:00 PM
Your great-grandma's sex toy looked like a cake mixer

Oh, yeah?  Well, YOUR great-grandmother's face looked just like my dog's ass!

I'm rubber...you're glue...
 
2013-02-22 11:17:02 PM
Oh lord, I think my grandmother had one of those things.  She said it was to get the wrinkles out of her face, and even showed me once.  She also kept it in the dining room, in the sideboard.  On the one hand, ew!!!  On the other, yay Grandma!

TheMega: [www.nerve.com image 600x447]


That reminds me of a CSS:  A few years ago I went to an amusement park with friends.  We were taking a break, and saw one of those "foot massager" set-ups - a row of chairs with that bump to separate your legs, and a foot plate.  And because you had to sit close up so your feet touched the plate, this saddle horn like bump was damn close to your crotch.  You paid a buck and it massaged your feet, so I tried it.  In reality, the "foot massager" vibrated your feet and the whole damn chair.  Strongly.  Very strongly.  I had to vacate the item a few seconds after it started, or else it would have become very embarrassing.  My friends saw me leave the chair and asked if I was ok, as I was flushed.  Just fine, it was too ticklish I said.  Man, I want one of those for home!
 
2013-02-22 11:19:13 PM

ReapTheChaos: [www.nerve.com image 600x400]

My barber still uses one of these, best part of getting a haircut.


Dafuq is that? It looks like something you wind transformers with.
 
2013-02-22 11:21:10 PM

Old Gnarled Oak: My grandmother was a simple farm girl and didn't need fancy gadgets

[i-cdn.apartmenttherapy.com image 540x360]


But it doesn't vibrate.

Unless you hollow it out and fill it with angry hornets.

Bzzzzz...bzzzz....
 
2013-02-22 11:22:13 PM

Duck_of_Doom: Oh lord, I think my grandmother had one of those things.  She said it was to get the wrinkles out of her face, and even showed me once.  She also kept it in the dining room, in the sideboard.  On the one hand, ew!!!  On the other, yay Grandma!

TheMega: [www.nerve.com image 600x447]

That reminds me of a CSS:  A few years ago I went to an amusement park with friends.  We were taking a break, and saw one of those "foot massager" set-ups - a row of chairs with that bump to separate your legs, and a foot plate.  And because you had to sit close up so your feet touched the plate, this saddle horn like bump was damn close to your crotch.  You paid a buck and it massaged your feet, so I tried it.  In reality, the "foot massager" vibrated your feet and the whole damn chair.  Strongly.  Very strongly.  I had to vacate the item a few seconds after it started, or else it would have become very embarrassing.  My friends saw me leave the chair and asked if I was ok, as I was flushed.  Just fine, it was too ticklish I said.  Man, I want one of those for home!


So I take it grandma used the same hand to pass the gravy
 
2013-02-22 11:54:33 PM

digitalrain: ReapTheChaos: [www.nerve.com image 600x400]

My barber still uses one of these, best part of getting a haircut.

Dafuq is that? It looks like something you wind transformers with.


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f26PkyZ4afI
 
2013-02-23 12:00:55 AM

FizixJunkee: orclover: fappomatic: According to my mother, her mother's sex toy WAS a mixer.

farking machines dot com.............cake mixer sex toy............all i'm going to say.

It's not everyday that I see something new on the internet.

\just saw something new on the internet


Glad I could help.  I have a 2 Terabyte removable hard drive with just 1 folder on it thats labeled "Sybian".  I dont have a problem or an addiction, I have FOCUS.

/and some crazy lady married me, can you believe it?
 
2013-02-23 12:37:14 AM
You gotta go old school sometimes

oldbulllee.com
 
2013-02-23 12:38:12 AM
i.imgur.com
 
2013-02-23 12:53:10 AM

MaxxLarge: Oh, Jesus. My mom had one of these in the hall closet, too.

Shiat.


And that is all I ever needed to know about your childhood. Kindly leave the internet and don't let the door hit you on the way out.

TheMega: [www.nerve.com image 600x447]

Geez, can't believe this thing is that old. Have this exact item, even sticker is worn ( and still works).  Got it in a yard sale and GREAT for bad back. Lay down on it, then position yourself where there is a disc out and stretch.. *POP*.. 90% of the time I can get my back to go back in place.
Doesn't seem to vibrate very much, though - wouldn't think women would get much of a rush out of it - of course back in the 60's with nothing else around... maybe they did.

/great, now I have this horrible image of some little old, ugly old, wrinkled old lady sexually abusing my back cracker.... screw u subby!!!


AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH

/My girlfriend has a thing with Hello Kitty on it. She uses it for her neck. She's weird.
 
2013-02-23 12:57:54 AM
i162.photobucket.com
 
2013-02-23 12:59:48 AM

orclover: Glad I could help. I have a 2 Terabyte removable hard drive with just 1 folder on it thats labeled "Sybian". I dont have a problem or an addiction, I have FOCUS.


Do you have this in your collection? (nsfw)
 
2013-02-23 01:19:25 AM

Ivo Shandor: orclover: Glad I could help. I have a 2 Terabyte removable hard drive with just 1 folder on it thats labeled "Sybian". I dont have a problem or an addiction, I have FOCUS.

Do you have this in your collection? (nsfw)


Everything.

/everything
 
2013-02-23 01:27:11 AM

Ivo Shandor: orclover: Glad I could help. I have a 2 Terabyte removable hard drive with just 1 folder on it thats labeled "Sybian". I dont have a problem or an addiction, I have FOCUS.

Do you have this in your collection? (nsfw)


idontwanttoliveonthisplanetanymore.jpg
 
2013-02-23 01:37:50 AM
so
this is one of those stories which green lit every couple of months?
YAWNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN

what is the time limit on a repeat?
same story identical story posted on a different website?

/hmmmmmmmmmmmmm note to self: repost this story once a week until I get a greenlight
/profit
 
2013-02-23 02:01:35 AM
Link

Song extremely relevant.
 
2013-02-23 06:06:49 AM

thepeterd: [upload.wikimedia.org image 784x1024]


I remember attending a church pot-luck dinner and hearing several of the church-going ladies going on and on about 'unbalancing the load".

Now I know WTF they meant.

/Ewwwww
 
2013-02-23 06:40:36 AM
Pretty sure my great grandmas sex toy looked like great grandpa. They had clown car numbers of childrens
 
2013-02-23 08:42:27 AM
 "It would fit over the clitoris quite nicely."

GEEZ, how bit is your clitoris?!!?
No wonder grandma and grandpa had separate beds.
 
2013-02-23 09:24:32 AM

Badgers: [i.imgur.com image 850x637]


Why did you share your mom's toy with us all?
 
2013-02-23 03:05:57 PM
For when those wicked thoughts about Richard Harding Davis became just too much........
 
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