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(Slate)   "The ideal in the shoe-size-correlation studies would be to measure a fully erect penis...as an alternative, most researchers stretch the non-erect penis before measuring its length. It turns out there is more than one way to stretch a penis"   (slate.com) divider line 159
    More: Interesting, measuring, shoe size, researchers stretch  
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10220 clicks; posted to Main » on 21 Feb 2013 at 8:44 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-02-21 08:13:25 AM
Who cares? If you spend much time worrying about the size of your penis then the size of your penis is not your main problem.
 
2013-02-21 08:31:05 AM
I'm a grower, not a show-er. And stretched out, I know it's not as big as when it's fully...um, engaged, so to speak.
 
2013-02-21 08:37:23 AM

SurfaceTension: I'm a grower, not a show-er. And stretched out, I know it's not as big as when it's fully...um, engaged, so to speak.


Word to that
 
2013-02-21 08:38:39 AM
I just cut out the middleman and measure my dong with a Braddock Device.

Granted, I get some odd looks at Payless, but accuracy is what matters.
 
2013-02-21 08:42:21 AM
FTFA:  Other researchers pull the penis to length three times before measuring it, the way a clown repeatedly stretches a balloon before inflating it and twisting it into the shape of a dog

Anybody else find this line unnecessarily descriptive?
 
2013-02-21 08:46:06 AM

unyon: FTFA:  Other researchers pull the penis to length three times before measuring it, the way a clown repeatedly stretches a balloon before inflating it and twisting it into the shape of a dog

Anybody else find this line unnecessarily descriptive?


Look, anyone who's pulled mine three times better damn well finish the job.
 
2013-02-21 08:46:15 AM

unyon: FTFA:  Other researchers pull the penis to length three times before measuring it, the way a clown repeatedly stretches a balloon before inflating it and twisting it into the shape of a dog

Anybody else find this line unnecessarily descriptive?


You don't do that with your penis? Weird...
 
2013-02-21 08:46:34 AM
Never has such a worry.

/Size 13 shoe, thanks.
 
2013-02-21 08:47:52 AM
Growers unite!  If you consume a healthy amount hallucinogens you will have eventually been naked in front of enough people that you don't even think about how it looks anymore.
 
2013-02-21 08:48:21 AM

unyon: FTFA:  Other researchers pull the penis to length three times before measuring it, the way a clown repeatedly stretches a balloon before inflating it and twisting it into the shape of a dog

Anybody else find this line unnecessarily descriptive?


No.  Medical journals...God...I cannot unsee what I've just read.  Did you really have to describe the surgical removal of a candiru from a guy's groin area?
 
2013-02-21 08:48:53 AM
Idiocracy: Coming to a reality near you.
 
2013-02-21 08:51:24 AM
Large penis, completely average shoe size, 9.5.

And who cares about size when stretched?  Isn't erect all that matters?

/not Ron Jetemy large
 
2013-02-21 08:51:59 AM

Nurglitch: unyon: FTFA:  Other researchers pull the penis to length three times before measuring it, the way a clown repeatedly stretches a balloon before inflating it and twisting it into the shape of a dog

Anybody else find this line unnecessarily descriptive?

You don't do that with your penis? Weird...


I usually turn mine into a 26-inch rendering of the FSM (suitable for framing!).

/Ramen.
 
2013-02-21 08:54:14 AM
Had my wang measured for a "Tanner stage" thing back in my teens. They just pulled it out but at that age it didn't take anything to get instantly boned, so, merry Christmas to them. There it was.
 
2013-02-21 08:54:21 AM
 It turns out there is more than one way to stretch a penis

That's what she said.
 
2013-02-21 08:54:22 AM
Come on, baby.
Let's do the twist.
 
2013-02-21 08:55:01 AM
It truly is unfortunate that so many men suffer needlessly from issues of low self-esteem, self-doubt, and downright paranoia when it come to the size of their penis. The truth is that the vast majority of men, even those who might have an abnormally small penis in the 6-7 inch range, can still enjoy a perfectly functional sex life. Many women are more than happy to pretend they don't care about penis size in order to enjoy other advantages, and recent innovations in self-pleasuring technology help ensure that all women paired with an inadequately endowed lover can still experience an occasional orgasm. Even so, there will always be those men for whom "just another inch, just one more" becomes an all-encompassing mantra.

If this is you, just remember that there are a variety of proven, safe, effective techniques out there that millions of men have used to successfully increase their size. No, they're not the expensive penis pumps and dangerous surgeries, the snake oil pills and the online scams. They're real, and you can do them, easily, yourself.

1) Remember that the size of your penis is controlled greatly by the amount of blood flow it receives. The greater the blood flow, the greater the size. Obviously, then, the larger the veins, the larger the penis. But how do you increase your vein size? Well, veins are a lot like muscles. When you work out and get sore, what's really happening is that muscle fibers are tearing and then repairing themselves. They repair themselves bigger and stronger than they were before. If you bruise the veins in your penis, it will hurt, but they'll be bigger when they heal. Do it enough, and you'll be astounded by the results.

What's important here is that you start with baby steps. Do not start punching your penis right on day one...much as in exercise, where newbies go whole-hog at the start and then quickly tire and lose interest, you want to begin with a relatively simple routine. Start by flicking yourself with your finger perhaps 30 times in a row, up and down all the veins that you can see. When it hurts too much to go on, give yourself another 3 or 4 flicks, then call it a day. Rest for two days, then repeat. If there's a little bruising, don't worry, that's normal. When you've successfully acclimated yourself to the flicking, move on to slapping, then clapping. Full on punching is the last step.

2) Also remember that your penis DOES have actual muscles in it. In fact, it is a muscle. So work it out! Any time your find yourself taking your penis out -- after a shower, at a urinal, watching porn, etc. -- don't just play with, exercise it! After a shower, get yourself erect and walk around for 10 or 15 minutes with a towel hanging from your penis. Start with the lighter towels, the wash cloths and hand towels, and work your way up to bath towels. You can do basic isometrics at a urinal...again, get yourself erect and then, with your palm, push down on your erection. Then push back up against your palm. Do about 20 or 30 of these "penis hand pushes," as they're called, and you'll see results within weeks.

3) Don't forget diet! Get in the habit of only eating when you have an erection. The extra blood flow to your penis will carry additional calories there, which will essentially deposit fatty tissue. Now, disclosure here: this won't do much to increase your length. But it WILL increase your girth. And trust me, guys...ladies like a girthy penis.

4) Finally, don't forget the power of the mind. Study after study has shown what an enormous effect positive thinking can have on everything from disease to happiness to overall mental well-being. Repeat the following Buddhist mantra to yourself at least four times an hour, every day:  I have a large penis. I am well endowed. Women are in awe of my penis. Men cower in the presence of my penis. You're not going to see immediate results here, but over the long term, you'll be amazed.

Remember, men: just because your not blessed at the outset doesn't mean you can't find ways to catch up. Seize the day, and seize your penis.
 
2013-02-21 08:55:51 AM
They did not account for the YAW factor.
 
2013-02-21 08:56:11 AM
Aren't all feet a foot long?*

*in no way refers to Subway's method of measuring a foot.
 
2013-02-21 08:56:12 AM
I just measure using Starbucks cups. I thought everyone did. Venti.
 
2013-02-21 08:56:20 AM
southparkstudios.mtvnimages.com
 
2013-02-21 08:57:27 AM
My feet aren't that big, but they are wide.  What does that mean?
 
2013-02-21 08:58:06 AM
It's a BRANNOCK Device, not Braddock. I wear a 14.
 
2013-02-21 09:00:41 AM

PsyLord: My feet aren't that big, but they are wide.  What does that mean?


It means you're fat.
 
2013-02-21 09:00:54 AM
I'm a size 11 but I wear 14's to impress the ladies.
 
2013-02-21 09:02:51 AM
...They can't figure out how to....what, are all the Scientists here under 12 years of age? I don't remember anyone needing to ask this question in high school. I think, by then, everyone had figured it out. Maybe they need some extra training.
 
2013-02-21 09:03:29 AM
"Different urologists may have their own views on how much force can be comfortably applied to the flaccid penis of a volunteer study participant."

are there any good looking female urologists for this study?
 
2013-02-21 09:05:44 AM
It might be small, but it holds a lot of blood!
 
2013-02-21 09:07:37 AM

hangloose: PsyLord: My feet aren't that big, but they are wide.  What does that mean?

It means you're fat.


stickerish.com
 
2013-02-21 09:09:51 AM

PsyLord: hangloose: PsyLord: My feet aren't that big, but they are wide.  What does that mean?

It means you're fat.

[stickerish.com image 145x154]


I apologize for saying that.
 
2013-02-21 09:09:56 AM
I always heard the shoe-size-correlation was for women.....and case in point:  My wife wears a size 12 pump and down there it's like the Darvaza Gas Crater.

www.puppiesandflowers.com
 .
 
2013-02-21 09:11:21 AM
What is average on the internets these days?  Nine?  Eight inches?

BTW-  been to India--- and I swear they just hand out shoes to poor people.... shocked at the number of waifish men wearing size 14 shoes.
 
2013-02-21 09:11:58 AM
I'm a 14 and you should see the canoes I strap to my feet.
 
2013-02-21 09:12:04 AM

karnal: I always heard the shoe-size-correlation was for women.....and case in point:  My wife wears a size 12 pump and down there it's like the Darvaza Gas Crater.

[www.puppiesandflowers.com image 450x300]
 .


Sulfurous?
 
2013-02-21 09:12:18 AM
Is this why I have to wear clown shoes?
 
2013-02-21 09:12:40 AM
Pocket Ninja:  those who might have an abnormally small penis in the 6-7 inch range


Pfft. My girlfriend's clit is bigger than that.
 
2013-02-21 09:12:56 AM
Pocket Ninja:

Bravo, good sir
 
2013-02-21 09:12:58 AM
FTFA:  The ideal in the shoe-size-correlation studies would be to measure a fully erect penis, but that's not feasible.

Why the hell not?  I mean, you're already handling the guys junk, why not ask him to get it up before doing so?
 
2013-02-21 09:14:24 AM

TheAlgebraist: karnal: I always heard the shoe-size-correlation was for women.....and case in point:  My wife wears a size 12 pump and down there it's like the Darvaza Gas Crater.

[www.puppiesandflowers.com image 450x300]
 .

Sulfurous?


Door to Hell
 
2013-02-21 09:15:19 AM

Pocket Ninja: It truly is unfortunate that so many men suffer needlessly from issues of low self-esteem, self-doubt, and downright paranoia when it come to the size of their penis. The truth is that the vast majority of men, even those who might have an  abnormally small penis in the 6-7 inch range, can still ...


<you're not helping.jpg>
 
2013-02-21 09:15:33 AM

Pocket Ninja: snipped so I don't read it again and start crying all over...



You are beautiful no matter what they say. Words can't bring you down.You are beautiful in every single way
 
2013-02-21 09:15:52 AM
FTFA: Other researchers pull the penis to length three times before measuring it, the way a clown repeatedly stretches a balloon before inflating it and twisting it into the shape of a dog.

Now all the Farkers on here are gonna picture a clown yankin' their weener, then blowing into it.
 
2013-02-21 09:17:04 AM
I couldn't categorically state where I exist on the spectrum of dong length, but I'm gonna go out on a limb and presume that nobody else on Fark wears a size 14AA shoe.

Fortunately my friendly neighborhood family boot store is happy to take bespoke orders, and there's still an American manufacturer who produces shoes in that size...
 
2013-02-21 09:17:31 AM

Mr. Coffee Nerves: I just cut out the middleman and measure my dong with a Braddock Device.

Granted, I get some odd looks at Payless, but accuracy is what matters.


Brannock, not Braddock. (I work at a shoe store)

/count me in with the growers
 
2013-02-21 09:17:42 AM

xanadian: FTFA: Other researchers pull the penis to length three times before measuring it, the way a clown repeatedly stretches a balloon before inflating it and twisting it into the shape of a dog.

Now all the Farkers on here are gonna picture a clown yankin' their weener, then blowing into it.


I have the weirdest boner right now.
 
2013-02-21 09:17:57 AM

xanadian: FTFA: Other researchers pull the penis to length three times before measuring it, the way a clown repeatedly stretches a balloon before inflating it and twisting it into the shape of a dog.

Now all the Farkers on here are gonna picture a clown yankin' their weener, then blowing into it.


I just beat off using balloon dogs
 
2013-02-21 09:18:04 AM
Is this the one where he sued for $500 million in reputational damage for a third party app that sold like 17 copies? I can understand people going in high when suing to make it easier to settle for a lesser amount, but surely it backfires if you go as far as that?
 
2013-02-21 09:18:39 AM
But my shoe size is only a 9 ???
 
2013-02-21 09:19:05 AM
This place is like Lake Woebegone.  And all the men are above average...
 
2013-02-21 09:19:49 AM

Abox: Pocket Ninja:  those who might have an abnormally small penis in the 6-7 inch range


Pfft. My girlfriend's clit is bigger than that.


Are you dating Chyna?

/Clenis
 
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