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(Science World Report)   Scientists discover that men are from Mars, women are from planet Oh God Why Are You Still Talking, Sweet Jesus Do You Ever Get to the Point   (scienceworldreport.com) divider line 553
    More: Interesting, get to the point, The Journal of Neuroscience, scientists  
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13472 clicks; posted to Main » on 20 Feb 2013 at 3:12 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-02-20 05:40:22 PM

WhippingBoy: My wife also has this unshakable belief that as long as I'm in the house, no matter what room I'm in or what's going on around her, that if she talks, I can somehow  hear her.

This morning: I'm in the downstairs shower, with the radio blasting. I finish, and walk upstairs...

Her: "Well???"
Me: "Well what?"
Her: "Weren't you listening to me???"
Me: ???


I didn't know I had an alt.
 
2013-02-20 05:40:39 PM

PsiChick: I think it's partly because, in America at least, we have this idea that a true scientist is unemotional, hyperliteral, and incapable of relating to other humans floating around our grab bag of cultural stereotypes. Drives me farking nuts. If you're scared of emotions because you can't play with decimals, that's called social anxiety, not rational behavior.


This is a perfect example of the kind of thing I get exasperated about. That's a common lay stereotype, it is true. It is one shared by many social scientists, it is also true. What is not true is that all or even most natural scientists share it. I have met many garrulous and friendly natural scientists. Research at the university level and teaching requires the ability to deal with human contact, especially in psychology and human biology and other natural science fields that study people.

I have literally studied and worked in both the social milieu of the natural scientists and the social milieu of the social scientists, and as I said I have degrees in both sociology and psychology. Each group holds misperceptions about the work and habits of the other group. It's literally basic tribalism and academic territoriality and it drives me farking nuts every time I have to deal with it because the universe at large does not give the slightest of shiats about the arbitrary boundaries we set up to describe the limits of our system of categorization of knowledge. Human biology and human society do not exist in discrete separate spheres that can be reduced to neat and seperate categories. They are instead a hugely complex system of interacting elements where multiple causality and overlapping influences are the norm, not the exception, and the idiotic wrangling over whose theories should get precedence when attempting to explain it is stupid and counterproductive.

Argh. End rant. As you may be able to tell, this is one of my personal pet peeves with regards to academia and the politics thereof.
 
2013-02-20 05:43:09 PM

fredklein: ciberido: She didn't ask you for advice. She told you she had a problem, because she wanted a shoulder to cry on.

Crying on a shoulder doesn't solve the problem. (unless the problem is a dry shoulder). Solving the problem solves the problem.


She doesn't want the problem solved.
 
2013-02-20 05:44:10 PM

doubled99: you're like a woman.


No, like an academic. The cultural norms are different. We're all long-winded and pedantic, men and women both.
 
2013-02-20 05:46:28 PM

ciberido: sethen320: My wife is horrible at communicating.  Incomplete thoughts, wrong words used, etc...

We just had a conversation about it the other day.  She has a bad habit of doing stuff like not actually pointing at things when asking for help retrieving something or whatnot.  She will "point" by looking at the object and then say "can you hand me that".  This typically leads to me or some other poor soul desperately trying to guess what "that" may be while being polite about it.  Meanwhile she gets more and more frustrated.

Nepalis often point with their lips.  It seems weird at first, but it homes in handy sometimes, mainly when both hands are already occupied.

Apparently some other cultures also point with their lips, as well.


sethen320, congratulations on marrying a Nepali. That's what makes America the great melting pot.

Plus, your children will be awesome mountain climbers.
 
2013-02-20 05:47:48 PM

Ed Grubermann: ciberido: AncientLurker: This thread is golden.
 My personal fav is when the x-wife used to tell me what was wrong in any situation, I would offer advice on how to fix it, which made me a jerk (if you ask me for advice, you should expect it).

She didn't ask you for advice.  She told you she had a problem, because she wanted a shoulder to cry on.

The problem is, you misinterpreted "I want to tell you about this problem" as "I want you to tell me how to fix this problem."

It's not exclusively a gender problem (both men and women do it, not all men do it), but it seems to happen more often with men for whatever reason.

Men fix things. It's what we do, and what we've been trained to do. It takes years to figure out that women don't want you to fix their problems. It might take less time f they'd just farking tell us in the first place. But most of them don't. We can't read minds.



Yes, but if you really want to assign blame, it's as much the man's fault for assuming without asking that the woman wanted a solution as it is her fault for not explicitly telling the man that she didn't want one.  Essentially, they're equally at fault, her for assuming he'd operate by "the women's rules" and him for assuming she'd operate by "the men's rules."

But for what it's worth, I take that into account now.  I've actually started prefacing stories with, "Now, I'm not asking you what I should do, but ..."

Also, and perhaps more importantly, I try to accept advice as "his way of telling me he cares" rather than "him telling me what to do."    It actually helps a lot.

(And again, it's not exclusively a male-vs-female thing.)
 
2013-02-20 05:48:16 PM
I typically walk around with an image of myself as a bad-ass apex predator, but whenever my wife begins a sentence with the word, "So..." (ellipses intentional) I freeze like a baby bunny in the underbrush. Sometimes, if I stay still and silent long enough, I blend back into her perceptual background and escape the hour-long, one-sided conversation about nothing she was about to initiate.
 
2013-02-20 05:48:28 PM

Talos: I'm surprised no one has brought up the cell phone factor.

When there's a cell phone involved the amount of superfluous b.s. women feel the need to talk about goes up by a factor of about 39 brazillion.


A magic puck that lets her talk to anybody, any time and anywhere?  Of COURSE it does.  Just be thankful they're not typing on it while piloting an SUV they can barely see over the steering wheel of.
 
2013-02-20 05:48:49 PM

Magnanimous_J: "She's the one who just had the baby, right?"

"The other women at work are threatened by your ideas."

"That sucks sweetheart, I'm sorry to hear that."

"I understand why that would be frustrating."

"You were right to react that way."


Shakeweight: Why don't you tell me about that woman you hate at work.
southparkstudios.mtvnimages.com
Shakeweight: What.
Shakeweight: What.
 
2013-02-20 05:50:33 PM
I have one!  It's called "the Dinner Game":

M: Where do you want to eat?
F: I don't know...
M: How about Jimmies?
F: No...
M: OK, how about Lobster Pile?
F: No...
M: OK, how about Steak and Poop?
F: No...
M: Well, where would YOU like to go?
F: I don't know...
M: OK, how about Miles O' Bacon?
F: No...
M: OK, how about Cheese Weasel?
F: No...
M: Well, I guess we could stay in then.
F: BUT YOU SAID WE WERE GOING OUUUUUUT!
 
2013-02-20 05:51:01 PM

ciberido: Yes, but if you really want to assign blame, it's as much the man's fault for assuming without asking that the woman wanted a solution as it is her fault for not explicitly telling the man that she didn't want one.  Essentially, they're equally at fault, her for assuming he'd operate by "the women's rules" and him for assuming she'd operate by "the men's rules."


Well that's true, until you realize that talking about a problem without seeking a solution is a galactic waste of time and pointless beyond belief.  This is particularly true when the solution is as simple as "have you considered talking to ______ and saying everything you just told me?"
 
2013-02-20 05:51:51 PM

Snarfangel: ciberido: sethen320: My wife is horrible at communicating.  Incomplete thoughts, wrong words used, etc...

We just had a conversation about it the other day.  She has a bad habit of doing stuff like not actually pointing at things when asking for help retrieving something or whatnot.  She will "point" by looking at the object and then say "can you hand me that".  This typically leads to me or some other poor soul desperately trying to guess what "that" may be while being polite about it.  Meanwhile she gets more and more frustrated.

Nepalis often point with their lips.  It seems weird at first, but it homes in handy sometimes, mainly when both hands are already occupied.

Apparently some other cultures also point with their lips, as well.

sethen320, congratulations on marrying a Nepali. That's what makes America the great melting pot.

Plus, your children will be awesome mountain climbers.


No, she's from here...just weird.
 
2013-02-20 05:52:25 PM

KiltedBastich: PsiChick: ...Anthropology actually discusses the difference between a social trait and a biological trait as part of its field. Like, again, this is what they teach in 101. As do most other social sciences. Part of the waist-hip thing is that any biological inclination would be very slight, like TFA--so slight as to be, for all intents and purposes, nonexistant. Humans do not have many true instincts, and there are some behaviors that pattern across all cultures. Schizophrenia, for example, manifests the same way in every culture. That's a biological trait.

This study, in my eyes, may well have found a slight indicator of a mild tendency to language. But that's about it. In another culture, it would be unnoticeable, which means there's very little value in the real world in looking at it as an indicator, although certainly it's of value to further research. But at some point, .00000000000000001 is just 0.

Yeah, they discuss it, and they often get it wrong, because they are generally lay people with respect to the expression of biological traits in behaviour who have distinct biases against the very concept. I've got degrees in sociology and psychology. I've taken those 101 classes you speak of and they get a lot wrong when they talk about the natural science when you compare it with what the natural sciences are actually saying (and vice versa, of course; both sides of this issue exasperate me).

To continue the example, the waist-hip thing is found everywhere, in wildly varying cultures all over the world. It's common as dirt and it works cross culturally, in that people from one culture who share the trait will be able to accurately judge the relative attractiveness of women from very different cultures who share that particular trait. There are some culttures that display very different tendencies, but all of those are very specific to the particular cultures, and do not generalize well. The culture can overwrite the basic tendency. But the tendency is there, a ...


Controlled studies of word use between women and men have consistently found no significant difference between words per day.
The article links another article as 'evidence' for the 7k word per day difference, yet the linked article absolutely does not support that claim.

Other than anecdote, there's really no evidence that men speak less (or women speak more). Rather, there's a wide range of speech use in both men and women, and we tend to remember individuals who violate the norm (for example, women who talk a lot).  A lot of this is confirmation bias.

There are gender differences in what people talk about, but not how much across the day.

http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=11762186

Disagree? Show me a well documented, peer reviewed, adequately controlled experiment that shows a significant difference between gender that's not explained by other factors.
 
2013-02-20 05:52:41 PM

Raoul Eaton: If we need to make a simple functional phone call and time is short, "Mrs. Eaton" has me make the call, even though she likes talking on the phone and I don't.  Make that, because she likes talking on the phone and I don't.  She can take 20 minutes to ask if we should bring a salad to the potluck, and I'll do the same conversation in less than a minute.  Each of us is in awe of the other on this.


Now that there is how to make the best out of a potentially difficult situation.  And doing that repeatedly is the secret to a good marriage.

I salute you, sir.
 
2013-02-20 05:53:12 PM

noitsnot: I have one!  It's called "the Dinner Game":

M: Where do you want to eat?
F: I don't know...
M: How about Jimmies?
F: No...
M: OK, how about Lobster Pile?
F: No...
M: OK, how about Steak and Poop?
F: No...
M: Well, where would YOU like to go?
F: I don't know...
M: OK, how about Miles O' Bacon?
F: No...
M: OK, how about Cheese Weasel?
F: No...
M: Well, I guess we could stay in then.
F: BUT YOU SAID WE WERE GOING OUUUUUUT!


I never get past two suggestions before giving up and telling her to pick something, ANYTHING, because I'm not her goddamn event planner.
 
2013-02-20 05:53:56 PM

noitsnot: I have one!  It's called "the Dinner Game":

M: Where do you want to eat?
F: I don't know...
M: How about Jimmies?
F: No...
M: OK, how about Lobster Pile?
F: No...
M: OK, how about Steak and Poop?
F: No...
M: Well, where would YOU like to go?
F: I don't know...
M: OK, how about Miles O' Bacon?
F: No...
M: OK, how about Cheese Weasel?
F: No...
M: Well, I guess we could stay in then.
F: BUT YOU SAID WE WERE GOING OUUUUUUT!


SO MUCH THIS
 
2013-02-20 05:56:13 PM
My current GF is a pre-school teacher.

I swear to God I know all the kids' names and who they're friends with and I've never walked in the door of this place.
 
2013-02-20 05:58:42 PM

oldfarthenry: In the early years of our marriage I used to be able to stop Mrs, Henry's babble-yakking with a loud burst of flatulence.
Now all it does is switch the subject noise to "poor air quality", "stubborn laundry stains" and "demands to see a doctor".


Aaand I just snerk'd trail mix out of my nose.
 
2013-02-20 05:59:46 PM
So, what have we learned from all of these battle of the sexes threads?  Here's what I've learned.  Gender based habits and perceptions lead to cultural constructs, some useful, some not, and men and women hate it when somebody who isn't another man or another women calls them on their crap.  I doubt there will be a forthcoming thesis.
 
2013-02-20 06:00:26 PM
I admit, I'm a chatterbox. I'll start going on and on about nothing, but I'll stop midway and ask if I'm annoying him. He'll just tell me it's lulling, especially if we're having this conversation before bed.

/shrug
 
2013-02-20 06:01:00 PM

gmpathfinder: KiltedBastich: PsiChick: ...Anthropology actually discusses the difference between a social trait and a biological trait as part of its field. Like, again, this is what they teach in 101. As do most other social sciences. Part of the waist-hip thing is that any biological inclination would be very slight, like TFA--so slight as to be, for all intents and purposes, nonexistant. Humans do not have many true instincts, and there are some behaviors that pattern across all cultures. Schizophrenia, for example, manifests the same way in every culture. That's a biological trait.

This study, in my eyes, may well have found a slight indicator of a mild tendency to language. But that's about it. In another culture, it would be unnoticeable, which means there's very little value in the real world in looking at it as an indicator, although certainly it's of value to further research. But at some point, .00000000000000001 is just 0.

Yeah, they discuss it, and they often get it wrong, because they are generally lay people with respect to the expression of biological traits in behaviour who have distinct biases against the very concept. I've got degrees in sociology and psychology. I've taken those 101 classes you speak of and they get a lot wrong when they talk about the natural science when you compare it with what the natural sciences are actually saying (and vice versa, of course; both sides of this issue exasperate me).

To continue the example, the waist-hip thing is found everywhere, in wildly varying cultures all over the world. It's common as dirt and it works cross culturally, in that people from one culture who share the trait will be able to accurately judge the relative attractiveness of women from very different cultures who share that particular trait. There are some culttures that display very different tendencies, but all of those are very specific to the particular cultures, and do not generalize well. The culture can overwrite the basic tendency. But the tende ...


Nope. Nobody has any need to respond to you. In the culture of the majority of users on this site, men speak far less than women. There is no more need to cite evidence than to convince you that the sky is the same color where I live as where you live. It's not up for debate; your questions are neither helpful nor permitted.

Women talk more than men. Now, on with the thread.
 
2013-02-20 06:03:49 PM
DNRTFA or the CT.

i.imgur.com

All you need to know.
 
2013-02-20 06:03:59 PM

my alt's alt's alt: I think it has more to do with personality type. In the eyes of Myers-Briggs, the typical "most womanly" personality type of ESFP is overtly talkative and superfluous in their speech patterns. Whereas myself, the INTJ woman, considers small talk stupid and pointless.

/other women don't "get" me, especially when my eyes glaze over while they ramble about talk shows and shoes
//men think I'm "cold"
///fark the lot of them


Amen, sister. INTP here; I had to tell my sister that, while I was excited that she thought she had met 'the one,' I wasn't going to be the best choice to

PanicAttack: my alt's alt's alt: I think it has more to do with personality type. In the eyes of Myers-Briggs, the typical "most womanly" personality type of ESFP is overtly talkative and superfluous in their speech patterns. Whereas myself, the INTJ woman, considers small talk stupid and pointless.

/other women don't "get" me, especially when my eyes glaze over while they ramble about talk shows and shoes
//men think I'm "cold"
///fark the lot of them

As an ISTJ, I completely agree.


INTP here. Yep.
 
2013-02-20 06:05:11 PM

fusillade762: Contrabulous Flabtraption: Women do indeed do this. They also "tell" you things without actually doing so, then get angry when you forget.

My mom did this to me the other night at dinner.

Her: "I think I'll have a glass of wine with dinner"
Me: "OK"

Her (later at dinner): "WHY DIDN'T YOU GET ME A GLASS OF WINE?!?"
Ladies, if you have a request please please please phrase it as one, not as a statement we're supposed to interpret.


Mrs. B's preferred phraseology is "Do you want to X" which can be loosely translated as "You will X or you will hear about it for the next five days."
 
2013-02-20 06:05:37 PM

YixilTesiphon: WTF is wrong with your wives?


They are female.
 
2013-02-20 06:06:15 PM

Fark Rye For Many Whores: PsiChick: Humans do not have many true instincts,

Wat.

and there are some behaviors that pattern across all cultures. Schizophrenia, for example, manifests the same way in every culture.

Horseshiat, it's demon possession, it's the voice of one god, another, across cultures.

That's a biological trait.

Yeah mostly.

This study, in my eyes, may well have found a slight indicator of a mild tendency to language. But that's about it. In another culture

Agreed, this diff could be all cultural.


...No, I mean that while they  interpret it different ways, there's still a basic pattern: A schizophrenic will hallucinate, have disordered speech, etc.. The symptom list is basically the same, even if they say it's different.

KiltedBastich: PsiChick:  lots of words ...


A) Psychology is usually considered a social science. Neurology isn't, but psychology is. That's part of why psychology has a field devoted to uncovering the differences in psychology between cultures; there are very few hard and fast rules when you leave neurology behind.

B) I think you're mistaking my point. I'm not arguing that biology isn't an influence; I'm arguing that we all experience the same mild, universal biological urges, that our social training then translates on an  unconscious level. It  looks like instinct. It is  not. Let's ignore your waist-to-hip ratio example and look at your example of parrots bobbing their heads. Why is the human bobbing their head? To keep in time with the crappy Vanilla Ice song they're playing. Why is the parrot bobbing his head? He's saying you have something he wants--it's body language. That's  not the same thing.

What I'm talking about is better described using this example: In America, common methods of suicide are guns and knives, but in the Middle East, it's fire. Why? Because the same urge--a strong one, in this case--is translated differently due to  unrelated ideas about symbolism, sexyness of weapons, etc.. That's culture. It gives a lens for a biologically-based reaction, or sometimes psychologically-based. Now, language is  much more complicated, and from what I know feral children never learn it without someone actively teaching it to them. That indicates that it's insanely unlikely that any biology has such an effect on language that it would influence word count. But a researcher might find that if they hadn't studied social sciences and didn't realize language is not innate.
 
2013-02-20 06:07:50 PM

KiltedBastich: PsiChick: I think it's partly because, in America at least, we have this idea that a true scientist is unemotional, hyperliteral, and incapable of relating to other humans floating around our grab bag of cultural stereotypes. Drives me farking nuts. If you're scared of emotions because you can't play with decimals, that's called social anxiety, not rational behavior.

This is a perfect example of the kind of thing I get exasperated about. That's a common lay stereotype, it is true. It is one shared by many social scientists, it is also true. What is not true is that all or even most natural scientists share it. I have met many garrulous and friendly natural scientists. Research at the university level and teaching requires the ability to deal with human contact, especially in psychology and human biology and other natural science fields that study people.

I have literally studied and worked in both the social milieu of the natural scientists and the social milieu of the social scientists, and as I said I have degrees in both sociology and psychology. Each group holds misperceptions about the work and habits of the other group. It's literally basic tribalism and academic territoriality and it drives me farking nuts every time I have to deal with it because the universe at large does not give the slightest of shiats about the arbitrary boundaries we set up to describe the limits of our system of categorization of knowledge. Human biology and human society do not exist in discrete separate spheres that can be reduced to neat and seperate categories. They are instead a hugely complex system of interacting elements where multiple causality and overlapping influences are the norm, not the exception, and the idiotic wrangling over whose theories should get precedence when attempting to explain it is stupid and counterproductive.

Argh. End rant. As you may be able to tell, this is one of my personal pet peeves with regards to academia and the politics thereof.


...I said it was a stereotype. People do display stereotypes sometimes, but I certainly wasn't saying that everyone who goes into hard sciences actually acts like that. It's just the occasional idiot who then makes a Fark page.
 
2013-02-20 06:08:36 PM

Pilikia: I typically walk around with an image of myself as a bad-ass apex predator, but whenever my wife begins a sentence with the word, "So..." (ellipses intentional) I freeze like a baby bunny in the underbrush. Sometimes, if I stay still and silent long enough, I blend back into her perceptual background and escape the hour-long, one-sided conversation about nothing she was about to initiate.


Yep... I know exactly what you're talking about.
 
2013-02-20 06:09:13 PM
HER: "What did you buy at Walgreens today?
ME: "Where?"
HER: "Walgreens. I was looking at the checking account online and saw a debit card transaction for $5.43."
ME: "Oh. Tylenol. I had a bad headache."
HER: "I thought we were going to discuss debit card purchases together before making them as part of our new family budget plan."
ME: "Um..."
HER: "I mean, you can't just live your own separate life like this. We need to communicate if we're going to make this budget work. You know the Millers, right? They put all of their expenditures from each day into a spreadsheet together, every night, and they..."
ME: (leaving room)
HER: "Where are you going?"
ME: "Getting the Tylenol."
 
2013-02-20 06:09:44 PM

Klippoklondike: Article says women are better at small talk?  If the point at small talk is to say 20 gazillion words with no clear point and no single topic or direction then yes, women are great at small talk.  If the point is to kill time and actually learn something, men are better at small talk.


This is known as the "Bechdel Test".
 
2013-02-20 06:10:37 PM

Pilikia: noitsnot: I have one!  It's called "the Dinner Game":

M: Where do you want to eat?
F: I don't know...
M: How about Jimmies?
F: No...
M: OK, how about Lobster Pile?
F: No...
M: OK, how about Steak and Poop?
F: No...
M: Well, where would YOU like to go?
F: I don't know...
M: OK, how about Miles O' Bacon?
F: No...
M: OK, how about Cheese Weasel?
F: No...
M: Well, I guess we could stay in then.
F: BUT YOU SAID WE WERE GOING OUUUUUUT!

SO MUCH THIS


Once my wife did this.  I walked out, got in the car, went to In-n-Out, had a nice burger, fries, and coke, then drove home.  She asked me where the hell I went.  I told her I had dinner.  So I didn't get any sex that night.  Nor any for the next week.

I am no longer married.
 
2013-02-20 06:12:42 PM
My current wife has a bad habit of starting to talk to me from another room while I am doing something.   If I stop, give her attention, and ask her to start over, so I can catch up, I get something snarky like "The price of tea in China has doubled in the past year".

My Ex-wife is driving me crazy right now.   Our son won't talk to her anymore.   He wants nothing to do with her, no texts, no phone calls, no hugs, nothing.   I tried counseling, but it did no good, because all he would tell the counselor is "I don't like her anymore", and then go silent.   He won't talk to me about it.    I have full custody, but now she the ex- has a tax return and she is mad he won't deal with her.   Now she is all angry and screaming at me because the son won't give her a hug.    She is going to try and get Court Ordered Counseling to fix it.  I am a horrible father because I can't see how much pain he is in and I haven't done enough to fix it.    "He doesn't like you" and "He only appears to be in pain when he is dealing with you" just get cuss words.    She got a new fiance' at Christmas.    Now I am not a real man, like he is.   She always mistakes my politeness towards her as friendship.    I let her know this weekend that my veneer of civility is just that.   She stepped over the line, and now she is clear that the line exists.     I will probably end up in court within the month.
 
2013-02-20 06:13:18 PM
I love this thread. I am sorely tempted to show it to my girlfriend but I don't think she'll understand why. For me, it'd be about empathy, for her, it'd be able re-inforcing stereotypes and disrespecting her.
 
2013-02-20 06:14:04 PM
OgreMagi:Once my wife did this.  I walked out, got in the car, went to In-n-Out, had a nice burger, fries, and coke, then drove home.  She asked me where the hell I went.  I told her I had dinner.  So I didn't get any sex that night.  Nor any for the next week.

Probably because you silently mimed "In-n-Out burger" with hip thrusts. You have to admit that looks pretty obscene.
 
2013-02-20 06:16:02 PM
KiltedBastich:

Everything we do, cognitively speaking, can be detected in other animals. The difference is in degree, not kind.

It's fun to watch my dog think and to keep track of his facial expressions: he knows what "fairness" is for example, and he obviously tries to find ways to get me to not go home. (The ex keeps him.) I'll grant you he's not so smart in human terms, unlike cats he can't even read with his butt, but it's not a matter of anthropomorphizing  him as much as realizing we share some traits & capabilities.

I'd bet it's possible to find commonality with fungi and virii if you pay attention, though making friends with a mushroom is beyond my ken.
 
2013-02-20 06:17:37 PM

weiserfireman: My current wife has a bad habit of starting to talk to me from another room while I am doing something.   If I stop, give her attention, and ask her to start over, so I can catch up, I get something snarky like "The price of tea in China has doubled in the past year".


We have something similar, except it's as I'm leaving the room to go do something. Not just walking out, but actually a couple of feet through the door into the next room. For some reason it makes me short-circuit and do things I normally wouldn't, like forget my wallet on the table if I'm going to the hardware store, that kind of thing.
 
2013-02-20 06:18:11 PM

Acharne: I love this thread. I am sorely tempted to show it to my girlfriend but I don't think she'll understand why. For me, it'd be about empathy, for her, it'd be able re-inforcing stereotypes and disrespecting her.


Dude go alpha.

OgreMagi: Pilikia: noitsnot: I have one!  It's called "the Dinner Game":

M: Where do you want to eat?
F: I don't know...
M: How about Jimmies?
F: No...
M: OK, how about Lobster Pile?
F: No...
M: OK, how about Steak and Poop?
F: No...
M: Well, where would YOU like to go?
F: I don't know...
M: OK, how about Miles O' Bacon?
F: No...
M: OK, how about Cheese Weasel?
F: No...
M: Well, I guess we could stay in then.
F: BUT YOU SAID WE WERE GOING OUUUUUUT!

SO MUCH THIS

Once my wife did this.  I walked out, got in the car, went to In-n-Out, had a nice burger, fries, and coke, then drove home.  She asked me where the hell I went.  I told her I had dinner.  So I didn't get any sex that night.  Nor any for the next week.

I am no longer married.


You lucky barstad!!!
Wish I had thought of that.
 
2013-02-20 06:18:49 PM
Her: What do you want for supper?
Me: How about steak?
Her: I defrosted the salmon.
Me: OK, let's have the salmon.
Her: But I don't have an onion for the rice!
Me: I'll go get one.
Her: I don't really feel like cooking the salmon.
Me: OK.
Her: Unless you really want it.
Me: No, what would you like?
Her: But I defrosted the salmon, I don't want it to go bad.
Me: OK.
Her: What do you want with it.
Me: Why don't we have some of those frozen vegies we have.
Her: We could have steak, there's some in the freezer.
Me: Great.
Her: unless you want the salmon.
 
2013-02-20 06:20:36 PM

weiserfireman: I will probably end up in court within the month.


Some women seek a mate and a partner.  Some women seek leverage points.  And there are a metric f*ckton of them provided in the more arcane points of matrimonial law and all of it's overwrought postures.  Try and avoid the latter group as they are often largely uninterested in your happiness or theirs.
 
2013-02-20 06:21:02 PM

Glancing Blow: Her: What do you want for supper?
Me: How about steak?
Her: I defrosted the salmon.
Me: OK, let's have the salmon.
Her: But I don't have an onion for the rice!
Me: I'll go get one.
Her: I don't really feel like cooking the salmon.
Me: OK.
Her: Unless you really want it.
Me: No, what would you like?
Her: But I defrosted the salmon, I don't want it to go bad.
Me: OK.
Her: What do you want with it.
Me: Why don't we have some of those frozen vegies we have.
Her: We could have steak, there's some in the freezer.
Me: Great.
Her: unless you want the salmon.


"Both" is an acceptable answer. Then the leftovers can be eaten for the next meal, bypassing the circular discussion completely.
 
2013-02-20 06:21:11 PM

badgerb: Acharne: I love this thread. I am sorely tempted to show it to my girlfriend but I don't think she'll understand why. For me, it'd be about empathy, for her, it'd be able re-inforcing stereotypes and disrespecting her.

Dude go alpha.
OgreMagi: Pilikia: noitsnot: I have one!  It's called "the Dinner Game":

M: Where do you want to eat?
F: I don't know...
M: How about Jimmies?
F: No...
M: OK, how about Lobster Pile?
F: No...
M: OK, how about Steak and Poop?
F: No...
M: Well, where would YOU like to go?
F: I don't know...
M: OK, how about Miles O' Bacon?
F: No...
M: OK, how about Cheese Weasel?
F: No...
M: Well, I guess we could stay in then.
F: BUT YOU SAID WE WERE GOING OUUUUUUT!

SO MUCH THIS

Once my wife did this.  I walked out, got in the car, went to In-n-Out, had a nice burger, fries, and coke, then drove home.  She asked me where the hell I went.  I told her I had dinner.  So I didn't get any sex that night.  Nor any for the next week.

I am no longer married.

You lucky barstad!!!
Wish I had thought of that.


Going to In-N-Out or getting divorced?
 
2013-02-20 06:21:50 PM

farkingnotworking: YixilTesiphon: WTF is wrong with your wives?

I'm wondering that too.  And why do you stay with them if they annoy you so?


I didn't.
 
2013-02-20 06:22:07 PM

Glancing Blow: Her: What do you want for supper?


"Pizza.  I ordered it"

"What about the salmon?"

"F*ck the salmon."
 
2013-02-20 06:22:17 PM

Pilikia: I typically walk around with an image of myself as a bad-ass apex predator, but whenever my wife begins a sentence with the word, "So..." (ellipses intentional) I freeze like a baby bunny in the underbrush. Sometimes, if I stay still and silent long enough, I blend back into her perceptual background and escape the hour-long, one-sided conversation about nothing she was about to initiate.


So back in the heyday of World of Warcraft, my then-gf got cornered at work by some obnoxious loudmouth coworker lady, who is one of those people who spends all day moving from cubicle to cubicle, complaining.  About anything and everything.  Just complaining.

The lady had just oozed up to my gf's desk when another (much younger) coworker walked past the office and yelled "Feign death!".  My gf (and nearby coworkers, equally tired of the biatchfest) laughed so loudly that the complainhose briefly paused in confusion, allowing them all to make up excuses for leaving.

The CSB ends with the gf and I breaking up a few months later, which is totally irrelevant to the rest of the story... and now I sound like she did.  Aigh.
 
2013-02-20 06:22:33 PM
 
2013-02-20 06:23:55 PM
 
2013-02-20 06:26:10 PM
I don't want to denigrate this important discussion, but am I the only one who thought, damn, that's a mighty come-over-here-big-boy mouth when the article opened.
 
2013-02-20 06:26:23 PM

vegaswench: I am going to teach a class. "How To Respond When Someone At Work Asks You How You Are 101."

Only accetable answer: "Fine, how are you?"

All other responses get an F.


I hate this shiat.  If you don't want to know how I am, don't ask the question, you shallow, disingenuous prick.  Also, don't stand there looking offended when I don't ask you the same question.  I don't ask unless I care enough about the answer to want a real one.
 
2013-02-20 06:26:51 PM

ennuie: Women don't talk more than men.


Yes they do. It's not up for debate- we're stuck to it. If you find a study that says otherwise, then there's a fault in the study.
Say, in picking students- they're forced to talk for school.
 
2013-02-20 06:27:11 PM

ennuie: Women don't talk more than men.


Yeah, but we say more.
 
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