If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(The Sun)   Dear Deidre, my boyfriend and I might be cheating on each other with same guy, on top of that my period is late and I don't know who the dad is (Not safe for work pic)   (thesun.co.uk) divider line 153
    More: Strange  
•       •       •

39133 clicks; posted to Main » on 18 Feb 2013 at 8:31 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



153 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

Archived thread

First | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | » | Last | Show all
 
2013-02-18 09:27:37 PM  
The highlight of TFA for me:
Maria Fowler
 
2013-02-18 09:30:23 PM  
Looks like summer fruit to me.
 
2013-02-18 09:30:25 PM  
Go back to the age of 3. Make all different decisions this time. Everything you have done up until now has been wrong.
 
2013-02-18 09:30:38 PM  

Mija: Bored Horde: I enjoy how the columnist of this MOST ASSUREDLY NOT MADE UP STORY subtly encouraged the young lady to have her little problem taken care of.

DancingElkCondor: She just wrecked her future hook ups as everyone now knows her fun hole has been hit by dudes who been up each other's fart hole.

Yeah I think she's better off avoiding gents who are so squeamish about her past sexual history and so fundamentally ignorant about basic biology.  Someone who is freaked out because a woman had sex with a man who has had sex with another man is probably going to be awful in bed.

So to be good in bed you must have no moral standards and be willing to screwing someone who has dangerous sexual practices that can lead to life ending std's? Damn. I never knew that. There are a lot of people who died of AIDS who would disagree with you.


Bisexuals are disgusting?  Please proceed, Governor.
 
2013-02-18 09:30:44 PM  

remus: Have you heard about the new Birth Control pill for Men?


It changes your blood type...


I'm not sure I get it. Is the joke that someone thinks a paternity test is a test of blood type?
 
2013-02-18 09:30:44 PM  

poison_amy: austin_millbarge: Lenny and Carl: If you're going to model lingerie for stock photos shouldn't your boobs be approximately equal in size?  That left one appears to have a bit of catching up to do.
You also probably think the house at the end of the street is smaller than all the houses that are closer.
/Farking perspective, how does it work?
I don't know...  the boob in the FRONT (her left) is the one that looks smaller.  So if it's a matter of perspective, that means she's even more lopsided than she appears.


It's called foreshortening. It isn't so much that it's in the front, it's that it is pointing towards the camera.
She's also standing at an angle that exaggerates the effect.

Lenny and Carl: she's one of the roughly 46% of women with asymmetrical breasts.


The angles and her position are right to create the illusion that her breasts are different sizes.
They may also actually be different sizes, but usually the difference is so small that it's hard to tell if the woman is wearing a bra.
 
2013-02-18 09:31:45 PM  
Is this where we are now?  Now that women have appropriately coloured anuses and vaginas and nipples, thighs that don't touch, and no hair below the neck... we're going to start harassing them to have corrective surgery to match their breast sizes?
Is there a single person on the planet you'd actually deign to fark?


Easy there, Galahad.  I said it was an undesirable quality in a lingerie model, not a crippling disfigurement.  I'll give you a million dollars if you can find any variation of "unfarkable" in my post.
 
2013-02-18 09:40:58 PM  
No Florida tag?

Oh, must be fake.
 
2013-02-18 09:40:59 PM  

walkerhound: iheartscotch: Why do I keep hearing banjos when I read that article?

/ their getting closer

Their getting closer what?


Whose getting closer.
 
2013-02-18 09:42:12 PM  
Ahhhh, I see the missing piece of the puzzle.  Look closely at the picture.  Look at her shoes!!  That is not the woman who wrote the letter, it is the "man" she was shagging!!  After 2 bottles of wine, she wouldn't have been able to tell another woman from Abe Vigoda.  The whole thing is a setup on the part of her clever boyfriend, who knows she is knocked up but wants to get rid of her and make her think it is her idea.

Well, which is more plausible, my idea or the idea that this actually happened as written?
 
2013-02-18 09:47:47 PM  
Love between two people can be a beautiful thing.
You just have to be between those two hot, ripe, horny people.
 
2013-02-18 09:47:49 PM  
Of all the agony aunts, Deirdre has the best imagination.
 
2013-02-18 09:52:28 PM  

Lenny and Carl: Is this where we are now?  Now that women have appropriately coloured anuses and vaginas and nipples, thighs that don't touch, and no hair below the neck... we're going to start harassing them to have corrective surgery to match their breast sizes?
Is there a single person on the planet you'd actually deign to fark?

Easy there, Galahad.  I said it was an undesirable quality in a lingerie model, not a crippling disfigurement.  I'll give you a million dollars if you can find any variation of "unfarkable" in my post.


Yeah, but I doubt they are as lopsided as you suggest.  One is full-on, the other is profiled.  Because of her posture, her left shoulder is up high, which will pull that breast up, while her right shoulder is down, which will let that breast fall more.  And since she is wearing a bra, the right breast can't just hang, so all the "droop" is going to fill the cup; for the right all the slack is going toward the shoulder, and not in the cup.  But her hips are canted the other way, so the breasts are still being pulled in opposite directions, but the hips bring them back down in line.  If she kept her shoulders in the same position  but stood wither her hips level, you would swear she has a very bad case of scoliosis.  Make her stand normal, full on to the camera, and I doubt you could tell any real difference
 
2013-02-18 09:53:13 PM  
the

it fits.
 
2013-02-18 09:55:04 PM  
I would plow the model in that picture like paul bunyan's ox.

/ Lopsided tits and all
 
2013-02-18 09:56:33 PM  
So there are two two-timers and one double two-timer?
 
2013-02-18 09:56:55 PM  

Bored Horde: Bisexuals are disgusting? Please proceed, Governor.


Just the dudes.
 
2013-02-18 09:58:13 PM  
... fap?
 
2013-02-18 10:00:47 PM  

mcmnky: The highlight of TFA for me:
Maria Fowler


I agree. I clicked, then I right clicked.
 
2013-02-18 10:03:45 PM  

SmithHiller: So there are two two-timers and one double two-timer?


Dude?  You'd plow his ox?
 
2013-02-18 10:04:13 PM  
...and on to more advanced anatomy critique:

Her Legs !!!
One is definitely longer than the other!!!

/why no fall down go boom?
//Boom!
 
2013-02-18 10:06:30 PM  
I often wonder why her advice isn't more like, "Is there a loaded handgun nearby that you could put in your mouth, or perhaps a length of rope or some cyanide?"
 
2013-02-18 10:06:52 PM  

finnished: Typical - she's cheating on him, but at the same time jealous that he might be cheating on her.


She didn't mention jealousy; she's just confused.
 
2013-02-18 10:09:20 PM  
If these two guys have been exchanging naked pictures, gay or straight, neither of them is treating your relationship seriously nor likely to prove an involved and caring dad. Being a single mum in such circumstances is tough.

As opposed to being a single mom who  farking cheated. Yeah. She's serious and likely to prove an involved and caring mom! Go, Diedre!

/The fark is this shiat?
 
2013-02-18 10:09:55 PM  

antidisestablishmentarianism: poison_amy: I don't know...  the boob in the FRONT (her left) is the one that looks smaller.  So if it's a matter of perspective, that means she's even more lopsided than she appears.

I think this needs to become a boob thread so we can evaluate the phenomenon of angles and boobie asymmetry.


I just checked in the mirror... I think mine are pretty much the same size... but oddly enough, one is about a quarter of an inch HIGHER than the other.  I never noticed before.
 
2013-02-18 10:13:00 PM  

vudukungfu: Love between two people can be a beautiful thing.
You just have to be between those two hot, ripe, horny people.


LOL : )
 
2013-02-18 10:13:50 PM  
I'm talking about masturbation on my Facebook page today.
 
2013-02-18 10:18:36 PM  
They work in a call center. This kind of behavior shouldn't be all that surprising.
 
2013-02-18 10:19:26 PM  
You got what you deserved, whore.
 
2013-02-18 10:20:26 PM  

MBooda: Dear Sandwiched, dear Sandwiched, you have no complaint...


I think that's the first Prine reference I've seen on Fark. And now that song will be stuck in my head for the rest of the evening.
 
2013-02-18 10:21:11 PM  
Love the nitwits answer that the b/f wasn't taking the relationship serious......but the slut got nailed on the couch and totally isn't to blame, and if she's not pregnant she's lucky and in the clear.

Just when you think idiotic women cannot get more idiotic.
 
2013-02-18 10:23:21 PM  
If you really get advice from a newspaper that reserves page 3 for pictures of women who are naked and big breasted, then you're more farked than you realize.
 
gja [TotalFark]
2013-02-18 10:25:16 PM  

stuhayes2010: More importantly, why doesn't your boyfriend have a smart phone?


[img.thesun.co.uk image 620x930]


Why should he have a smart phone? There isn't one smart gene in their entire pool. What possible use could they have for it?
 
2013-02-18 10:25:22 PM  
1) I find it odd that any man would look at that picture and think about lopsided breasts.
2) The advice makes no mention of the extreme wrongness of the cheating girl (I realize it's self-evident but I'm used to the Dear Abby moral compass type advice).
 
2013-02-18 10:25:57 PM  
if she chose high heels over wingtips this never would have happened.
 
2013-02-18 10:27:16 PM  

BarkingUnicorn: finnished: Typical - she's cheating on him, but at the same time jealous that he might be cheating on her.

She didn't mention jealousy; she's just confused.


Yeah, sure. The cell phone just fell into her hands and opened up in the right menu option. I've heard that before.
 
2013-02-18 10:28:26 PM  

PsiChick: If these two guys have been exchanging naked pictures, gay or straight, neither of them is treating your relationship seriously nor likely to prove an involved and caring dad. Being a single mum in such circumstances is tough.

As opposed to being a single mom who  farking cheated. Yeah. She's serious and likely to prove an involved and caring mom! Go, Diedre!

/The fark is this shiat?


I've 100% had it with the single mom worship, dad hatred... makes my head hurt
 
2013-02-18 10:29:15 PM  
Really the only problem I see is the dishonesty. I'm mean really. Although there was a movie sorta like this.
encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com
 
2013-02-18 10:31:49 PM  
*looks at picture on article*

notbad.jpg

Sounds like these three are missing an opportunity for a threesome. The guys won't even have to worry about the balls touching.
 
2013-02-18 10:33:06 PM  

mrswood: This is the apparent order of importance of issues in the article.
1. My boyfriend may be cheating
2. My boyfriend is gay
3. Pregnant, who's the baby daddy?
Sure, that seems right to me



Approves
ecx.images-amazon.com
/hot like Sally Bowles
 
2013-02-18 10:36:30 PM  

Alexei Novikov: *looks at picture on article*

notbad.jpg

Sounds like these three are missing an opportunity for a threesome. The guys won't even have to worry about the balls touching.


That's the only fun kind, wut?
 
2013-02-18 10:39:11 PM  

NameDot: PsiChick: If these two guys have been exchanging naked pictures, gay or straight, neither of them is treating your relationship seriously nor likely to prove an involved and caring dad. Being a single mum in such circumstances is tough.

As opposed to being a single mom who  farking cheated. Yeah. She's serious and likely to prove an involved and caring mom! Go, Diedre!

/The fark is this shiat?

I've 100% had it with the single mom worship, dad hatred... makes my head hurt


...You do know this is fake, and most single moms\absent dads are nothing like this, right?
 
2013-02-18 10:39:53 PM  

tinfoil-hat maggie: Really the only problem I see is the dishonesty. I'm mean really. Although there was a movie sorta like this.
[encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com image 189x267]


Really? I was thinking of something else:

i2.listal.com
 
2013-02-18 10:41:06 PM  
Menages a trois DO NOT WORK THAT WAY!
 
2013-02-18 10:41:43 PM  

FARTNOISE FARTNOISE JUNIOR: MBooda: Dear Sandwiched, dear Sandwiched, you have no complaint...

I think that's the first Prine reference I've seen on Fark. And now that song will be stuck in my head for the rest of the evening.



Also, this.
 
2013-02-18 10:44:40 PM  

belhade: tinfoil-hat maggie: Really the only problem I see is the dishonesty. I'm mean really. Although there was a movie sorta like this.
[encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com image 189x267]

Really? I was thinking of something else:

[i2.listal.com image 720x574]


Well your example was consensual everyone knowing what's going on and well in Plan B that's not the case.
 
2013-02-18 10:46:55 PM  

DancingElkCondor: She just wrecked her future hook ups as everyone now knows her fun hole has been hit by dudes who been up each other's fart hole.


The story is obviously fake in the genre of Dear Penthouse Forum, I never thought this would happen to me...... That being said, DancingElkCondor, that is one of the funniest things I have read all year. Thank you sincerely for the lulz.
 
2013-02-18 10:49:00 PM  
I feel stuck in some warped love triangle.
I feel
stuck in some warped love triangle.
I feel stuck in
some warped love triangle.
That's because you are.
That's
because you are.
That's
because you are.

Quit calling me I'm not the one.
 
2013-02-18 10:52:41 PM  

thorthor: DancingElkCondor: She just wrecked her future hook ups as everyone now knows her fun hole has been hit by dudes who been up each other's fart hole.

The story is obviously fake in the genre of Dear Penthouse Forum, I never thought this would happen to me...... That being said, DancingElkCondor, that is one of the funniest things I have read all year. Thank you sincerely for the lulz.


Yeah the story is probably fake, but these type of things do happen in real life, and more than you would think. I have known a couple of women who had done this with a man and a woman that were in a relationship, and were hetting money and gifts from both of them.
 
2013-02-18 10:53:35 PM  

belhade: tinfoil-hat maggie: Really the only problem I see is the dishonesty. I'm mean really. Although there was a movie sorta like this.
[encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com image 189x267]

Really? I was thinking of something else:

[i2.listal.com image 720x574]


Ahh, before Lara Flyyn Boyle turned into a plastic surgery nightmare...
 
Displayed 50 of 153 comments

First | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | » | Last | Show all

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


This thread is archived, and closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »
On Twitter





In Other Media


  1. Links are submitted by members of the Fark community.

  2. When community members submit a link, they also write a custom headline for the story.

  3. Other Farkers comment on the links. This is the number of comments. Click here to read them.

  4. Click here to submit a link.

Report