ZAZ: I think the dog shot them both then shot itself after realizing it couldn't work the can opener.

Okay all you Farkers study this well. THIS is actual snarl. I know many CLAIM it on Fark, but without actual humor it is called just being an asshole.

jim32rr: On the Sunday morning sidewalk,
Wishing, Lord, that I was stoned.
'Cos there's something in a Sunday,
Makes a body feel alone.
And there's nothin' short of dyin',
Half as lonesome as the sound,
On the sleepin' city sidewalks:
Sunday mornin' comin' down

Borrowed/Stolen/Whateva

Was that Maroon 5, No Doubt or Julian Lennon?

thefatbasturd: ZAZ: I think the dog shot them both then shot itself after realizing it couldn't work the can opener.

Okay all you Farkers study this well. THIS is actual snarl. I know many CLAIM it on Fark, but without actual humor it is called just being an asshole.

Looks more like snark to me.

TommyymmoT: The Larch: js34603: Good thing she has that gun handy in case someone broke into her house.

That's the crazy thing. She attempted suicide multiple times, had an arrest record longer than your arm, and was a suspect in the death of her boyfriend. Why did she have a gun at all?

Because this.

Well, if she went to the closest school and shot up the....

Naw, school officials would just ban edgy, non-Bieber non-Taylor heavy metal "terristic" music instead. The gun debate would just derp along.

Mulchpuppy: thefatbasturd: ZAZ: I think the dog shot them both then shot itself after realizing it couldn't work the can opener.

Okay all you Farkers study this well. THIS is actual snarl. I know many CLAIM it on Fark, but without actual humor it is called just being an asshole.

Looks more like snark to me.

frigging phone touch screen...

Ruff way to go out.

On Fark, when a mentally ill woman and a dog die, we only feel bad for the dog.

Fano: jim32rr: CarnySaur: jim32rr: On the Sunday morning sidewalk,
Wishing, Lord, that I was stoned.
'Cos there's something in a Sunday,
Makes a body feel alone.
And there's nothin' short of dyin',
Half as lonesome as the sound,
On the sleepin' city sidewalks:
Sunday mornin' comin' down

Borrowed/Stolen/Whateva

Was that Maroon 5, No Doubt or Julian Lennon?

Sorry not familiar with any of them, emerging Auto-Tune singers?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3aF9AJm0RFc

Here's that guy's first original hit


Actually, it's a Kris Kristofferson song.  Johnny had a hit with it before Kris, "grew some legs" and recorded his own version.

I love you, you are my master. *puts snout on her lap* You look so sad mum. *looks up with baleful eyes and nuzzles hand*

BLAM!

/selfish biatch
//glad the kids weren't there

fark her dog. all dogs go to heaven, remember.

I'm sad that she died.  I really hate suicide, but what are you going to do.

Suicide is not selfishness.  It's painless.  Sorry.  Life sucks.

*woof* *woof* - *BANG* - *BANG*

That's three verses, did I get it right?

Several stations around here have listed her death as being due to alcoholism. I suppose if you have an agenda, you can bend facts however it best suits you...

Hit me with you best shot...fire away....

It's assholes like this that make the two or three dozen responsible gun owners in this country look bad.

MFAWG: Seriously: why?

Maybe she was really close to the dog, and didn't want the dog to be sad and alone after she died. Too bad she didn't think that about her kids. Maybe the dog shiat one too many times on the rug, and it sent her over the edge. Who the hell knows.

Let her RIP.  It was bound to not end well.

LDM90: On Fark, when a mentally ill woman and a dog die, we only feel bad for the dog.

Only one of them wanted to die.

Here's how it went down...
Crazy b*tch killed dog
then She suicided herself
The End!

Prank Call of Cthulhu: Good move. Otherwise the dog might get all OMNOMNOMNOM on your corpse afterwards. Consider offing the dog a little insurance against post-mortem snacking.

Some years ago a study was done about something called 'survival predation' - to put it bluntly, how long a household pet would go before chowing down on your mortal remains if you passed away in the house and nobody realized it.  After correlating information from a number of cases, the scientists figured out that on average, dogs would go three to SEVEN days before finally saying the doggie equivalent of 'Screw it, I'm hungry."

Cats give you, on average, twenty-four hours.

Remember that the next time you wake up and find your cat staring at you..

Oh and by the way, "BUTTONS!!!!!! Silly puppy!" BANG!

AtlanticCoast63: Cats give you, on average, twenty-four hours.

That sounds like a bullshiat study.

My cat would give me five minutes, tops.

Prank Call of Cthulhu: AtlanticCoast63: Cats give you, on average, twenty-four hours.

That sounds like a bullshiat study.

My cat would give me five minutes, tops.

YMMV :D