Russians can't even keep a meteor from exploding over their skies. You know what Russia is? It's a sitting duck, a road apple. Russia is weak. It's feeble. I think it's time to put the hurt on Russia.

Dear Russia,

Please stop trying to make Guam happen.

Sincerely,
America

Slow your roll, Russia! What's that? You're flying Bears? My bad. Can't get much slower than that.

Slaxl: Russians can't even keep a meteor from exploding over their skies. You know what Russia is? It's a sitting duck, a road apple. Russia is weak. It's feeble. I think it's time to put the hurt on Russia.

I am from Russia. What you say Russia weak?

I'm assuming this is why we shot an asteroid at them and Cuba.

In retaliation, Obama fired up the meteor machine. Take that, you dirty Russkies.

This is just to distract the Japanese from the murderous rampage a few days prior.

Wolfman Johnny: I'm assuming this is why we shot an asteroid at them and Cuba.

My posts are too slow.

Oh well, back to the hurricane generator.

Snarfangel: In retaliation, Obama fired up the meteor machine. Take that, you dirty Russkies.

Came for this, thank you:)

I want to warn the Russians, if they tip over Guam, it will be considered an act of war.

Snarfangel: I want to warn the Russians, if they tip over Guam, it will be considered an act of war.

came here for this reference. leaving happy.

Wolfman Johnny: I'm assuming this is why we shot an asteroid at them and Cuba.

I'm assuming this is why we shot an asteroid at them and Cuba. And for good measure, San Francisco...

Hell, I don't even know what to call them. Guambats? The Guamish? Guammy bears?

texdent: Is Guam even that vital to us?

It's our chief source of guamanium.

jake_lex: I wonder how many American planes were probing Russian defenses at around the same time.  Or Chinese defenses.  Or North Korean defenses.  Etc. etc.

Non-story.

We must not allow a probing gap.

First Obama gives away free Reaganphones in Cleveland, now this.

It's like we rebooted Final Fantasy and the last save point was in 1985.

What about all the prisoners at Guamtonomo Bay??

Great clown Pagliacci's pick-me-up: Hell, I don't even know what to call them. Guambats? The Guamish? Guammy bears?

Pretty sure if not serious, but the proper demonym is "Guamanian."  Or "Chamorro," if you're talking about Guam's indigenous people or something specific thereto.

Russians over Guam, a 'vacation' by himself in Hawaii. Something is up.

texdent: Is Guam even that vital to us?

Yeah, pretty much

Forget bear cavalry, the Russkies have bear bombers?!? We're so farked.

jake_lex: I wonder how many American planes were probing Russian defenses at around the same time.  Or Chinese defenses.  Or North Korean defenses.  Etc. etc.

Non-story.

deadsanta: Forget bear cavalry, the Russkies have bear bombers?!? We're so farked.

Not really. They are completely useless in the winter.

I can't believe they would stop stealing from each other long enough to plan a military action like this.

I hear Russian bombers probed your mom.

Do the Russians have the right to bear bombers?

Is Guam a scandal yet?

Since Vladimir Putin reclaimed the Russian presidency, U.S. officials said the number of such flights in the vicinity of the Aleutian Islands and Alaska have increased, but encounters with U.S. aircraft have remained "generally very professional."

How would the encounters end up less than professional without setting them off? Cutting them off in their air traffic lane? If their Russian road rage videos speak for the masses, then it seems like something even that little could spark a war.

/Yea I know their pilots fark around with us by buzzing our territorial waters, we launch our fighters and escort them back.

If we lose Guam then we will only have 56 more states left.

This is a tactic of pick pockets called misdirection. You wave your hand off in some other direction, on the opposite side of the thing you are stealing. So with russian bombers just flying around guam, the thing being robbed would be washington DC...funny, on the same day the president is giving speeches.

texdent: Is Guam even that vital to us?

It's a military strong point with a harbor and a few airfields that is within support distance of many of our Pacific allies.

Guam.

Without it, it would be more difficult to support any major military operations in the Pacific.

Somebody notify Fred Thompson.