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(io9)   12th-century prophecy by Irish archbishop claims Benedict XVI's resignation brings doomsday upon us. Mayans unavailable for comment   (io9.com) divider line 90
    More: Scary, Pope Benedict XVI, prophecy, Discovery News, solar eclipses, John Paul II, documents, mayans  
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6856 clicks; posted to Geek » on 14 Feb 2013 at 3:11 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-02-14 01:45:21 PM
Great. Whatever. Bring it. I'm tired of all the fake outs.

Bronze Age utopia here I come.
 
2013-02-14 02:01:50 PM
blog.lib.umn.edu

"Coincidence?  READ THE BOOK!"
 
2013-02-14 02:05:06 PM
"...The City of the Seven Hills shall be utterly destroyed, and the awful Judge will judge the people."

I think this means that LA will be destroyed and that Scalia will be promoted to Chief Justice.
 
2013-02-14 02:05:26 PM
Take that, Mayans! Cathocalypse FTW!
 
2013-02-14 02:07:22 PM

Angry Drunk Bureaucrat: "...The City of the Seven Hills shall be utterly destroyed, and the awful Judge will judge the people."

I think this means that LA will be destroyed and that Scalia will be promoted to Chief Justice.


Sorry: San Fransisco.
 
2013-02-14 02:10:14 PM
It's just the end of the church, not the end of the world. I'm OK with this
 
2013-02-14 02:10:36 PM
To me, the most shocking thing about this, is that it's somehow not Nostradamus.

You see, History Channel? You start putting on shows about truck drivers and alligators and what's the first thing that happens? Our Nostradamus obsession falls by the wayside. We're getting prophecies from old Popes and blacksmiths and it's just anarchy!
 
2013-02-14 02:14:44 PM

Angry Drunk Bureaucrat: "...The City of the Seven Hills shall be utterly destroyed, and the awful Judge will judge the people."

I think this means that LA will be destroyed and that Scalia will be promoted to Chief Justice.



I was thinking that the "awful Judge" was a reference to Stallone.
 
2013-02-14 02:18:58 PM
Yes.  That prophecy looks really legit when you take abstract facts out of pope's lives and make them fit the bill.  It's like chiseling off the corners of a square peg so it'll fit the round hole.
 
2013-02-14 02:19:45 PM

DjangoStonereaver: [blog.lib.umn.edu image 460x300]

"Coincidence?  READ THE BOOK!"


Nice flashback.
 
2013-02-14 02:23:25 PM
I'm convinced. Time to start murderin folks.
 
2013-02-14 02:26:48 PM

Sybarite: Angry Drunk Bureaucrat: "...The City of the Seven Hills shall be utterly destroyed, and the awful Judge will judge the people."

I think this means that LA will be destroyed and that Scalia will be promoted to Chief Justice.


I was thinking that the "awful Judge" was a reference to Stallone.


That or Simon Cowell.
 
2013-02-14 02:36:27 PM
No, enough. 2012 should have been the last of this end of the world horseshiat. The world will end when the sun burns out. By then we will have either colonized another world or evolved into a new species. Or we'll be sitting in front of our iDevice. But it's not happening in our lifetime, I don't care how much you hate your lives and wish it to be so.
 
2013-02-14 02:52:11 PM

jayhawk88: To me, the most shocking thing about this, is that it's somehow not Nostradamus.

You see, History Channel? You start putting on shows about truck drivers and alligators and what's the first thing that happens? Our Nostradamus obsession falls by the wayside. We're getting prophecies from old Popes and blacksmiths and it's just anarchy!


Actually, there's a theory that it was a Nostradamus prediction, but he didn't want to sign his name to it because it was about the Church.  Telling the Catholic Church that they were eventually doomed once they a certain number of popes might not have gone over too well.
 
2013-02-14 03:19:13 PM
"Mayans unavailable for comment"

Because they're dead due to shiatty forecasting skills.
 
2013-02-14 03:24:30 PM
Another doomsday prediction?
I'm getting mighty sick & tired of stocking and unstocking that damned underground bunker of mine. Mrs. Henry won't go in it anymore after my "canned chili" aftermath.
 
2013-02-14 03:30:17 PM
i.qkme.me
 
2013-02-14 03:32:05 PM

Mugato: No, enough. 2012 should have been the last of this end of the world horseshiat. The world will end when the sun burns out. By then we will have either colonized another world or evolved into a new species. Or we'll be sitting in front of our iDevice. But it's not happening in our lifetime, I don't care how much you hate your lives and wish it to be so.


I would say there is still a small chance for a nuclear apocalypse in our lifetime.
 
2013-02-14 03:34:38 PM
"Mayans unavailable for comment"

static.tvfanatic.com
 
2013-02-14 03:42:13 PM

The Angry Hand of God: Mugato: No, enough. 2012 should have been the last of this end of the world horseshiat. The world will end when the sun burns out. By then we will have either colonized another world or evolved into a new species. Or we'll be sitting in front of our iDevice. But it's not happening in our lifetime, I don't care how much you hate your lives and wish it to be so.

I would say there is still a small chance for a nuclear apocalypse in our lifetime.


I don't know. I like to think of Africa as the world's guide to the "End of the World". Europe has farked it up so much that everyday there is some sort of road warrior crap going on in some such a country. So assuming Nuclear apocalypse happens, We have relatively small pockets of land that will be un-livable (and face it, in the end of the world, I would rather live in the country on a farming village compound than a concrete desert), and the rest will just be...smaller countries, assuming EMPs manage to destroy all the worlds communication. But honestly, the Middle East seems to do fine without cell phones, so whatever.

Basically, I call the End of the World an impossibility. It's just the end of an era. Unless Jesus, then giving god his omnipotence...sure.
 
2013-02-14 03:48:20 PM
Pope Lenny Bruce is not afraid.
 
2013-02-14 03:52:09 PM

oldfarthenry: Another doomsday prediction?
I'm getting mighty sick & tired of stocking and unstocking that damned underground bunker of mine. Mrs. Henry won't go in it anymore after my "canned chili" aftermath.



Your "aftermath" is why I had to build my damned bunker.
I recommend Bean-O and Febreeze.
 
2013-02-14 03:58:00 PM
Somewhat widespread apocalypse predictions (very incomplete listing): 183
Correct apocalypse predictions: 0

I'm obviously pretty nervous about this one though, it seems legit.
 
2013-02-14 04:10:12 PM

Angry Drunk Bureaucrat: Angry Drunk Bureaucrat: "...The City of the Seven Hills shall be utterly destroyed, and the awful Judge will judge the people."

I think this means that LA will be destroyed and that Scalia will be promoted to Chief Justice.

Sorry: San Fransisco.


well the 49ers were destroyed in the super bowl, so maybe the catholic church will just go bankrupt and we'll get a less-flashy end of the world
 
2013-02-14 04:10:15 PM

pastorkius: Somewhat widespread apocalypse predictions (very incomplete listing): 183
Correct apocalypse predictions: 0

I'm obviously pretty nervous about this one though, it seems legit.



Still better odds than the Powerball
 
2013-02-14 04:11:27 PM
Damn Irish!
 
2013-02-14 04:11:52 PM
Why is it that most of this end of the world prophacy BS usually comes from people that don't look at enough internet porn?
 
2013-02-14 04:13:40 PM
Imagine a world where children aren't given to authority figures to be raped by their pious, stupid parents.

BRING ON THE END TIMES!
 
2013-02-14 04:13:51 PM

pastorkius: Somewhat widespread apocalypse predictions (very incomplete listing): 183
Correct apocalypse predictions: 0

I'm obviously pretty nervous about this one though, it seems legit.


you know who said "i correctly predicted the end of the world"? nobody ever
 
2013-02-14 04:17:02 PM
Well, I'll not go canceling any reservations or anything.
I lost a bundle on that 2012 winter solstice booking, and all for nothing.

Hypnozombie
 
2013-02-14 04:22:41 PM

AdamK: pastorkius: Somewhat widespread apocalypse predictions (very incomplete listing): 183
Correct apocalypse predictions: 0

I'm obviously pretty nervous about this one though, it seems legit.

you know who said "i correctly predicted the end of the world"? nobody ever


Oh weird!  How does that work???
 
2013-02-14 04:32:05 PM
Thats the real reason for the end of the world BS. Its gonna be a black pope.
 
2013-02-14 04:32:52 PM
www.ivg.it
 
2013-02-14 04:34:27 PM
And then it turned out that Benedict XVI himself was a horcrux.
/Gandalf and Snape rode jet packs together.
 
2013-02-14 04:36:00 PM
I blame O'Bama.
 
2013-02-14 04:38:06 PM

Angry Drunk Bureaucrat: Sybarite: Angry Drunk Bureaucrat: "...The City of the Seven Hills shall be utterly destroyed, and the awful Judge will judge the people."

I think this means that LA will be destroyed and that Scalia will be promoted to Chief Justice.


I was thinking that the "awful Judge" was a reference to Stallone.

That or Simon Cowell.


Oh god, it's Nikki Minaj!  That's it, we're boned.
 
2013-02-14 04:42:01 PM
*16th-century "prophecy" falsely attributed to 12-century Irish archbishop
 
2013-02-14 04:42:41 PM
it was a mis-translation.  The original Irish saint wasn't St. Malachy, it was St. Malarky.

Quite the prankster that Malarky.

and that is why we have Marmelade today.

// almost a blacksmithing trifecta
/ no, I have no reason to say that.
 
2013-02-14 04:43:17 PM
As for the doomsday pope, one would think we are quite safe: according to church tradition, no pope can take the name Peter II.
However, one of the favorites to succeed Benedict XVI is Ghanaian Cardinal Turkson. His first name is Peter.


Also running for title Cardinal Peter Erdo, of Budapest, and Cardinal Odilo Pedro Scherer, of São Paulo.
 
2013-02-14 04:45:45 PM
Were all to be judged by the awful judge. Is that a good way to describe god? The only thing I fear about being judged awfully is the awful part.
 
2013-02-14 04:52:38 PM
www.theforce.net
Something, something ... complete.

/I care a lot.
 
2013-02-14 04:56:01 PM

Lonestar: [www.ivg.it image 800x538]


I hope he is the one elected.  The butthurt will be glorious.
 
2013-02-14 04:58:54 PM
"According to the premonition, Peter the Roman would "feed his flock amid many tribulations "

sounds like something a god damn Canadian would do.
 
2013-02-14 05:11:43 PM
See, this is why Benedict should have taken George Ringo as his regnal name.

We'd have John Paul, and then George Ringo, and then the reign of the Popes would end with..

Peter the Best.
 
2013-02-14 05:14:09 PM
This claim has been made about the last three Popes. Baloney!
 
2013-02-14 05:20:04 PM
Seems legit. The only question is which seven-hilled city will be destroyed.

/I vote Staten Island
 
2013-02-14 05:24:35 PM
If the next Pope is black, will he take the name, Malcolm XI?
 
2013-02-14 05:25:31 PM

Supes: Seems legit. The only question is which seven-hilled city will be destroyed.

/I vote Staten Island


Winnipeg has 7 man made snow chutes.....
 
2013-02-14 05:31:23 PM

A Terrible Human: /Gandalf and Snape rode jet packs together.


SPOILER ALERT!!!!
 
2013-02-14 05:35:37 PM
I've always been far more creeped out by these prophecies: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Three_Secrets_of_F%C3%A1tima

And I vaguely remember one from some girls in Mexico(?) that had needles put in their eyes (to test them!) while supposedly communing with God/archangel/Mary/whatever.  I, also vaguely, remember seeing grainy b&w video of them but my Google skills find nothing.

/Atheist
//Still find this kind of stuff interesting if only because the believers are <i>so sure</i>.
///Ever danced with the devil in the pale moon light?
 
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