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(Slate)   1: Invent a "social disorder" so that losers who can't talk to women don't feel like it's their fault. 2: Design counseling program designed to help the afflicted. 3: Profit   (slate.com ) divider line
    More: Stupid, Social Disorder, program designer, Rebecca, DSM, Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, dance studio, social anxiety disorder, National Institute of Mental Health  
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9680 clicks; posted to Main » on 14 Feb 2013 at 1:45 PM (3 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



237 Comments     (+0 »)
 
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2013-02-14 11:27:41 AM  
You think shyness is a social disorder that's just been invented recently so someone can make money? That's a bit silly, don't you think?
 
2013-02-14 11:40:41 AM  

Slaxl: You think shyness is a social disorder that's just been invented recently so someone can make money? That's a bit silly, don't you think?


it's not that shyness is new. But now it's a "social disorder" that requires pills. I guess hitting the bar with your friends is to hard.

Is there anything we do now a days that doesn't have a pill to help it along?
 
2013-02-14 11:42:18 AM  
Shyness can stop you from doing all the things in life you'd like to.
 
2013-02-14 11:48:06 AM  

BunkoSquad: Shyness can stop you from doing all the things in life you'd like to.


Don't ask me about the time I wrote frightening verse to a buck-toothed girl in Luxembourg.
 
2013-02-14 12:00:31 PM  
It's just more Millennial whinery.

They're victims of SAD because they can't talk to another person and if someone looks at them the wrong way they're victims of bullying.  They're always victims and can't take their eyes off their navels.
 
2013-02-14 12:01:50 PM  

The Stealth Hippopotamus: Slaxl: You think shyness is a social disorder that's just been invented recently so someone can make money? That's a bit silly, don't you think?

it's not that shyness is new. But now it's a "social disorder" that requires pills. I guess hitting the bar with your friends is to hard.

Is there anything we do now a days that doesn't have a pill to help it along?


So you don't think there's a chemical component to pathological shyness?  Do you also think that chronically depressed people just need to suck it up and smile more?
 
2013-02-14 12:18:50 PM  

Mentat: So you don't think there's a chemical component to pathological shyness? Do you also think that chronically depressed people just need to suck it up and smile more?


pathological shyness?!

Maybe they should stop trying to be like everyone else? Maybe we need our shy people? Or we just drug everyone up and turn them into Woo Girls!

img521.imageshack.us

effing makes me sick. You're not like everyone else?! HERE! take a pill.
 
vpb [TotalFark]
2013-02-14 12:20:48 PM  

The Stealth Hippopotamus: Slaxl: You think shyness is a social disorder that's just been invented recently so someone can make money? That's a bit silly, don't you think?

it's not that shyness is new. But now it's a "social disorder" that requires pills. I guess hitting the bar with your friends is to hard.

Is there anything we do now a days that doesn't have a pill to help it along?



michelle2005.files.wordpress.com
 
2013-02-14 12:26:02 PM  
Just meeting the people you chat with online is a huge thing. I've made it a bit of a hobby to actually find the people who I screw around with. And, by default, that means I'll have to travel some pretty good distances.
 
2013-02-14 12:30:21 PM  

vpb:

[michelle2005.files.wordpress.com image 300x229]


Yeah that's it. Compare PTSD to shyness. See how that works out for you.

While you're at it compare child prostitution to not given a kid a participation trophy.
 
2013-02-14 12:44:49 PM  

Snarcoleptic_Hoosier: Just meeting the people you chat with online is a huge thing. I've made it a bit of a hobby to actually find the people who I screw around with. And, by default, that means I'll have to travel some pretty good distances.


I think you were going for:

photos2.meetupstatic.com

But it kinda came off like:

studentbanter.files.wordpress.com
 
2013-02-14 12:48:38 PM  

thismomentinblackhistory: Snarcoleptic_Hoosier: Just meeting the people you chat with online is a huge thing. I've made it a bit of a hobby to actually find the people who I screw around with. And, by default, that means I'll have to travel some pretty good distances.

I think you were going for:

[photos2.meetupstatic.com image 360x270]

But it kinda came off like:

[studentbanter.files.wordpress.com image 625x416]


ok that was worth the time and effort!

Well done sir.
 
2013-02-14 12:50:50 PM  
FTFA: Not all of tonight's participants have been diagnosed with social anxiety disorder (SAD)

No. SAD is for Seasonal Affective Disorder. GO GET YOUR *OWN* ACRONYM!!!
 
2013-02-14 12:52:13 PM  

The Stealth Hippopotamus: thismomentinblackhistory: Snarcoleptic_Hoosier: Just meeting the people you chat with online is a huge thing. I've made it a bit of a hobby to actually find the people who I screw around with. And, by default, that means I'll have to travel some pretty good distances.

I think you were going for:

[photos2.meetupstatic.com image 360x270]

But it kinda came off like:

[studentbanter.files.wordpress.com image 625x416]

ok that was worth the time and effort!

Well done sir.


He has a particular set of skills.
 
2013-02-14 01:00:12 PM  
I know right, those losers should feel like it's their fault, after all there is something wrong with them.
If they can't fix themselves and get confident (stupids!), they deserve to feel bad and be lonely.
People who seek help for mental or emotional problems make me sick! Grrr! What happened to all the real men amiright!

oi49.tinypic.com


Stupid millenials. I weep for this country. Or at least I would, if I were a woman or gay or something.
 
2013-02-14 01:04:53 PM  
This shiat sounds like Scientology talk. These people will be getting tax exempt status if they get the right lawyers.
 
2013-02-14 01:49:13 PM  

L.D. Ablo: It's just more Millennial whinery.

They're victims of SAD because they can't talk to another person and if someone looks at them the wrong way they're victims of bullying.  They're always victims and can't take their eyes off their navels.


Haha. You're old and salty.
 
2013-02-14 01:50:13 PM  
Do the classes work?

Okay. Sign me up.
 
2013-02-14 01:50:38 PM  

This from TFA:

"Girls feel really comfortable around me," one man tells me later.



Reminded me of:
http://www.blackpeopleloveus.com/
 
2013-02-14 01:51:34 PM  
For some people, it's the gym. For others, it's alcohol. And still others, it's expensive clothes/cars/stuff. For these guys, it's classes. Something has always been taking your money to give yourself the courage to talk to women. If it's not one thing, it's another.
 
2013-02-14 01:51:54 PM  

The Stealth Hippopotamus: Slaxl: You think shyness is a social disorder that's just been invented recently so someone can make money? That's a bit silly, don't you think?

it's not that shyness is new. But now it's a "social disorder" that requires pills. I guess hitting the bar with your friends is to hard.

Is there anything we do now a days that doesn't have a pill to help it along?


Pill=encrypted-tbn3.gstatic.com
 
2013-02-14 01:53:59 PM  
Sometimes, not being able to talk to girls works out all right...

images1.wikia.nocookie.net
 
2013-02-14 01:54:04 PM  
So: you're shy? STOP IT!
 
2013-02-14 01:55:08 PM  
"Girls feel really comfortable around me," one man tells me later.

Really?  They don't feel comfortable around me.  Of course, that's because I'm going to have sex with them and they know it.

Even if I'm not.
 
2013-02-14 01:55:12 PM  
What kind of psycho logic are they using?
 
2013-02-14 01:55:17 PM  
Maybe pills are going a little overboard, but I don't think there is anything wrong with a dating workshop.
 
2013-02-14 01:55:30 PM  

blatz514: The Stealth Hippopotamus: Slaxl: You think shyness is a social disorder that's just been invented recently so someone can make money? That's a bit silly, don't you think?

it's not that shyness is new. But now it's a "social disorder" that requires pills. I guess hitting the bar with your friends is to hard.

Is there anything we do now a days that doesn't have a pill to help it along?

Pill=[encrypted-tbn3.gstatic.com image 194x259]


Take several and hope you never remember what you did.
 
2013-02-14 01:56:02 PM  

Slaxl: You think shyness is a social disorder that's just been invented recently so someone can make money? That's a bit silly, don't you think?


things that I am not are all made up because I am on the internet and thusly the most important person on it
 
2013-02-14 01:56:10 PM  

Mentat: So you don't think there's a chemical component to pathological shyness?  Do you also think that chronically depressed people just need to suck it up and smile more?


This thread is too full of pure derp to even try to convince people otherwise.

The main problems, as I see them, are that psychological disorders are overdiagnosed and the diagnoses have inherent subjectivity most times. That being said, having a relatively new awareness about something doesn't mean that it should be automatically disregarded because "it never existed before". Ahh, yes, the good old days, when men were men and everyone drank the same water they shat in.

Things change. Things evolve. Deal with it.
 
2013-02-14 01:57:07 PM  
My main problem with women is that they're always so testy with me once the chloroform wears off.
 
2013-02-14 01:57:13 PM  
Step 4) cruelly make all the instructors women..
 
2013-02-14 01:57:30 PM  
I don't think anyone should rely on a pill, but I can't really understand being incredulous that shy people exists and that there is a class available to assist them.
 
2013-02-14 01:58:04 PM  
The solution to shyness is to be passive-aggressive.  Now give me money.
 
2013-02-14 01:58:06 PM  

TheOther: blatz514: The Stealth Hippopotamus: Slaxl: You think shyness is a social disorder that's just been invented recently so someone can make money? That's a bit silly, don't you think?

it's not that shyness is new. But now it's a "social disorder" that requires pills. I guess hitting the bar with your friends is to hard.

Is there anything we do now a days that doesn't have a pill to help it along?

Pill=[encrypted-tbn3.gstatic.com image 194x259]

Take several and hope you never remember what you did.


What's funny is, when I meet a new girl I tend to drink way faster than I should...rendering me much stupider than usual.
 
2013-02-14 01:58:20 PM  
I just do lots of dissociatives to help deal with my crippling mental illness issues.
/You don't care if you can't feel.
//Been offered PTSD counseling but I'm too scared to go.
 
2013-02-14 01:58:32 PM  

Feral_and_Preposterous: So: you're shy? STOP IT!


media.tumblr.com
 
2013-02-14 01:59:16 PM  
Stupid?  Genius is what THAT is.
 
2013-02-14 01:59:34 PM  
blog.lib.umn.edu

It's been done...
 
2013-02-14 02:00:03 PM  
I'm torn between lambasting subby for not making a better headline or the sad realization that my headline would have never been greenlit because the mods wouldn't have gotten it.

/Shy dates: why not pretty soon?
 
2013-02-14 02:02:07 PM  
1. Invent social "injustice" so that losers and idiots unwilling or unable to obtain marketable skills don't feel like it's their fault when nobody wants to hire them for the job they "deserve".

2. Campaign with the promise to give them other peoples' money.

3. Profit??
 
2013-02-14 02:02:36 PM  
assets.nydailynews.com

submitter
 
2013-02-14 02:03:10 PM  
Some people have rehabilitating shyness due to extreme anxiety in social situations.  Poor responses in social situations cause a feedback loop as people learn to expect poor responses, which makes them even more anxious.

Some medications help reduce the symptoms of anxiety, which along with therapy and social practice, can help people become more comfortable with social interaction.

Ideally, with successful therapy, medication is no longer needed and a person becomes more comfortable with social situations.

I honestly can't see why people would get so high-and-mighty towards people who are seeking help for anxiety issues.

/i am not a psychiatrist or a psychologist, but I do like eating curry.
 
2013-02-14 02:03:53 PM  
As a woman who has occasionally been hit on by shy guys: this is awesome.  Can more guys take classes like this?  I fell in love with my husband because he was shy and it was sweet and endearing - other guys I have met have been shy and it was as awkward as a prairie dog farking a hippo.
 
2013-02-14 02:04:39 PM  

A Terrible Human: I just do lots of dissociatives to help deal with my crippling mental illness issues.
/You don't care if you can't feel.
//Been offered PTSD counseling but I'm too scared to go.


I can't imagine how difficult it would be, but all I can say is that, in the immediate, it will be difficult, but the benefits may be a long term improvement to your quality of life. Your experiences may vary, but emotional suppression of a psychological trauma always seems to catch up to people in a big way if it's not confronted. Although confonting it may be the most difficult thing you've ever done, try thinking in terms of five years from now or ten years from now.

/Just my two cents.
 
2013-02-14 02:05:03 PM  
Not every one can be a winner. The world needs losers too.
 
2013-02-14 02:05:33 PM  

The Stealth Hippopotamus: Is there anything we do now a days that doesn't have a pill to help it along?


Feeling shy? Lonely? New Extravertofil can help you get back in the game by reducing inhibitions and making it easier to engage with the opposite sex. Ask your doctor today if Extravertofil is right for you.

Side effects of Extravertofil may include ill-advised posting of embarrassing pictures on Facebook, beer goggling, hangovers, regrettable hookups, skeletal xylophoning, and REO speedlung. Women who are pregnant should not use Extravertofil because nobody wants to hit that. In rare instances, hard partying lasting more than 16 hours may occur. Seek medical attention immediately if this happens to you. Alcoholics and narcotics users should not use Extravertofil as its active ingredients are alcohol and cocaine.
 
2013-02-14 02:06:53 PM  

TaterTot_HotDish: As a woman who has occasionally been hit on by shy guys: this is awesome.  Can more guys take classes like this?  I fell in love with my husband because he was shy and it was sweet and endearing - other guys I have met have been shy and it was as awkward as a prairie dog farking a hippo.


I really want to GIS "prairie dog farking a hippo"  but the results frighten me.
 
2013-02-14 02:07:15 PM  

TaterTot_HotDish: As a woman who has occasionally been hit on by shy guys: this is awesome.  Can more guys take classes like this?  I fell in love with my husband because he was shy and it was sweet and endearing - other guys I have met have been shy and it was as awkward as a prairie dog farking a hippo.


I will find an opportunity to use this line today.
 
2013-02-14 02:07:18 PM  
No meatloaf man-boobs hug?

/sad
//pours some whiskey to cure the sad
 
2013-02-14 02:07:56 PM  

Mentat: So you don't think there's a chemical component to pathological shyness?


Of course there is.
Pathologically shy people are what is know as knurd-ly.  Unlike regular people, the don't produce natural alcohol, and so are always about two drinks below par.

This is actually the first illness I've seen described on the internet which I know I have.  And it even fits with my knurd theory, since I don't drink and the problem never goes away.
 
2013-02-14 02:08:45 PM  

Mentat: The Stealth Hippopotamus: Slaxl: You think shyness is a social disorder that's just been invented recently so someone can make money? That's a bit silly, don't you think?

it's not that shyness is new. But now it's a "social disorder" that requires pills. I guess hitting the bar with your friends is to hard.

Is there anything we do now a days that doesn't have a pill to help it along?

So you don't think there's a chemical component to pathological shyness?  Do you also think that chronically depressed people just need to suck it up and smile more?


There probably is a chemical component to shyness, sure. And depression is also a real thing.

The problem is that drug companies put advertisements in every single magazine and television show talking about vague symptoms that just about anyone has at some point experienced, and then encourages them to "talk to [their] doctor". Their doctor gets free samples from the drug companies and other perks and often doesn't have time to do a full evaluation of a person to see if they're actually suffering from something pathological as opposed to just being slightly quirky or even completely normal.

We've hit the point where 48% of the American population will be diagnosed with a mental illness at some point in their life. That's twice the rate of the European Union and Canada. Think about that. Either the EU and Canada are massively under-diagnosing people, or we're massively over-diagnosing people.

Lifestyle of course plays a part as well - Europeans tend to exercise more, for example. Moderate exercise has been shown to be as effective in treating depression as any antidepressant yet invented (except for the most severe cases), but we as a culture would rather take a pill with side effects than jog three times a week.

Now, to be clear, before I get attacked: I'm not saying that mental illness doesn't exist or isn't a major health concern. I'm not saying that you, gentle reader, are lying about whatever illness you may have been diagnosed with. I'm just saying that we as a society have a much, much higher rate of mental illnesses diagnosed than the rest of the civilized world and I don't think constant advertising by drug companies helps.
 
2013-02-14 02:09:38 PM  
I don't care if you want to get into the semantics of whether or not it's a "disorder," but if he's providing a valuable service to people whose lives will be improved by it, then yes, he deserves to profit.
 
2013-02-14 02:09:44 PM  

Lord Thorn: Sometimes, not being able to talk to girls works out all right...

[images1.wikia.nocookie.net image 376x301]


Yes... once every 30 years...
 
2013-02-14 02:10:04 PM  
The interesting part is that anti anxiety medications often cause sexual dysfunction.

SO, someone takes an anxiety med to get chicks, and then can't get off if he manages to get one in the sack.

Oh, irony. How I love you.
 
2013-02-14 02:10:08 PM  
In business school, step 1 is called "market development".
 
2013-02-14 02:11:19 PM  

Prank Call of Cthulhu: The Stealth Hippopotamus: Is there anything we do now a days that doesn't have a pill to help it along?

Feeling shy? Lonely? New Extravertofil can help you get back in the game by reducing inhibitions and making it easier to engage with the opposite sex. Ask your doctor today if Extravertofil is right for you.

Side effects of Extravertofil may include ill-advised posting of embarrassing pictures on Facebook, beer goggling, hangovers, regrettable hookups, skeletal xylophoning, and REO speedlung. Women who are pregnant should not use Extravertofil because nobody wants to hit that. In rare instances, hard partying lasting more than 16 hours may occur. Seek medical attention immediately if this happens to you. Alcoholics and narcotics users should not use Extravertofil as its active ingredients are alcohol and cocaine.


well played sir.

/fark has been awesome today
 
2013-02-14 02:12:11 PM  

McGrits: No meatloaf man-boobs hug?

/sad
//pours some whiskey to cure the sad


Um...here ya go I guess.  Sicko.

25.media.tumblr.com
 
2013-02-14 02:13:26 PM  
Headline and first half of this thread read like they were written by people confused by their VCR clock.
 
2013-02-14 02:13:36 PM  
This headline affects every person between 15 and 29. They ALL have "social disorders" suddenly.
 
2013-02-14 02:14:33 PM  
"Some people are too shy to succeed."

"So? it's always been that way, suck it up and fark you."

Well, how about fark you? I'm as wary of our tendency to overmedicate as anyone else, but simply acknowledging that this might EXIST and be addressable is not a problem. Don't go tossing pills, but if group therapy helps people become more outgoing, fark you, let them do it.
 
2013-02-14 02:15:26 PM  
Lord Dimwit:
The problem is that drug companies put advertisements in every single magazine and television show talking about vague symptoms that just about anyone has at some point experienced, and then encourages them to "talk to [their] doctor". Their doctor gets free samples from the drug companies and other perks and often doesn't have time to do a full evaluation of a person to see if they're actually suffering from something pathological as opposed to just being slightly quirky or even completely normal.

I think you've hit the nail on the head with this one.  First: direct marketing to consumers for prescription medication.  If you put out an advertisement advising people who suffer from some long list of vague symptoms, you're going to get people biting.

Second, general practitioners diagnosing mental illness is often not a great idea.  Some mental illnesses are pretty cut and dried, like seasonal affective disorder.  Others are very complex, like OCD, ADHD, bipolar, etc. If a person doesn't spend time with an appropriate specialist to get an appropriate medical opinion, you're going to end up with a lot of false diagnosis situations.  A regular doctor who gets to spend 10 minutes for an office visit with a patient really isn't going to have the time (and possibly the training and knowledge) to appropriately assess a patient for these types of conditions.
 
2013-02-14 02:16:04 PM  

Hagenhatesyouall: 1. Invent social "injustice" so that losers, idiots, and waitresses unwilling or unable to obtain marketable skills don't feel like it's their fault when nobody wants to hire them for the job  tips them like they "deserve".


/just trying to cross stream between threads
 
2013-02-14 02:16:13 PM  
I know what would help someone who's shy around girls -- calling them losers and saying that if they try and get help they're suckers who're getting ripped off!

\ Also, interesting that it's "don't feel like it's their fault" but they "talk to women"
 
2013-02-14 02:17:08 PM  

Shyla: This headline affects every person between 15 and 29. They ALL have "social disorders" suddenly.


I've noticed that too... no one views the various obstacles they face as challenges to be overcome anymore. Instead they demand that they be treated as a "special class" and demand that society cater to their challenges.

Personal character, whatever happened to ye?
 
2013-02-14 02:17:36 PM  

The Stealth Hippopotamus: Is there anything we do now a days that doesn't have a pill to help it along?


your curious attitude sounds like a condition, schedule an appointment so we can figure out what kind of pills you need to fix it

Western Psychology-Medicine:

Dr. WesternMedicine: Did you actually just page me to find out how much tylenol pills to give to Mrs. Lensner any random patient?
J.D.: I was worried it could exasterbate the patient's...
Dr. WesternMedicine: Its regular strength tylenol magic pills to make up for incompentent "doctors" who have to make up for incompetent "parents". Here's what you do: Get her to open her mouth, take a handfull and throw it at her. Whatever sticks - that's the correct dosage and/or prescription.

Read more  http://www.tvfanatic.com/quotes/shows/scrubs/episodes/my-first-day/#i x zz2Ku0nEt00
 
2013-02-14 02:18:08 PM  

Nightjars: A regular doctor who gets to spend 10 minutes for an office visit with a patient really isn't going to have the time (and possibly the training and knowledge) to appropriately assess a patient for these types of conditions.


Which is why a good doctors office will offer those services. The place where my mom goes to her primary care doctor also has a psych guy that comes in twice a week and if you're a patient there you have to see him every 1-3 months,he's the one that offered me free counseling but I'm terrified of telling him some of the things that bother me.
 
2013-02-14 02:19:20 PM  
So vudu, how come you aren't seeing anyone?

I haven't met anyone sane enough to put up with but crazy enough to fark me.
 
2013-02-14 02:20:33 PM  

Nightjars: Lord Dimwit:
The problem is that drug companies put advertisements in every single magazine and television show talking about vague symptoms that just about anyone has at some point experienced, and then encourages them to "talk to [their] doctor". Their doctor gets free samples from the drug companies and other perks and often doesn't have time to do a full evaluation of a person to see if they're actually suffering from something pathological as opposed to just being slightly quirky or even completely normal.

I think you've hit the nail on the head with this one.  First: direct marketing to consumers for prescription medication.  If you put out an advertisement advising people who suffer from some long list of vague symptoms, you're going to get people biting.

Second, general practitioners diagnosing mental illness is often not a great idea.  Some mental illnesses are pretty cut and dried, like seasonal affective disorder.  Others are very complex, like OCD, ADHD, bipolar, etc. If a person doesn't spend time with an appropriate specialist to get an appropriate medical opinion, you're going to end up with a lot of false diagnosis situations.  A regular doctor who gets to spend 10 minutes for an office visit with a patient really isn't going to have the time (and possibly the training and knowledge) to appropriately assess a patient for these types of conditions.


Plus there are a lot of people who think doctors are there to give them whatever prescriptions they want, and have no problems switching doctors until they find one who will.
 
2013-02-14 02:20:45 PM  

WhippingBoy: Shyla: This headline affects every person between 15 and 29. They ALL have "social disorders" suddenly.

I've noticed that too... no one views the various obstacles they face as challenges to be overcome anymore. Instead they demand that they be treated as a "special class" and demand that society cater to their challenges.

Personal character, whatever happened to ye?


Do you know how dumb that post sounds, considering that the article is about people taking steps to improve their social anxiety? They are LITERALLY trying to "overcome" their "obstacles."
 
2013-02-14 02:21:13 PM  

WhippingBoy: Shyla: This headline affects every person between 15 and 29. They ALL have "social disorders" suddenly.

I've noticed that too... no one views the various obstacles they face as challenges to be overcome anymore. Instead they demand that they be treated as a "special class" and demand that society cater to their challenges.

Personal character, whatever happened to ye?


My father is a high school teacher. When he gives a test, certain students are exempt from the time limit due to various disorders. The last test he gave, the special-needs group was fully a third of the class. Each of these kids had an official doctor's note and notes from their parents.
 
2013-02-14 02:21:18 PM  
what about social laziness disorder?  Can someone give me an insta-extrovert, bubbly, eyelash batting, flirtacious pill??  That facade is so much work and I am way to lazy to bother with it.
 
2013-02-14 02:22:02 PM  
As the poster child for shyness and awkwardness, I had great success with the "just ask her the fark out already" method.
 
2013-02-14 02:22:34 PM  
For anybody so concerned about the pathologizing of shyness, this book is recommended: Christopher Lane, Shyness: How Normal Behavior Became a Sickness
 
2013-02-14 02:22:54 PM  

A Terrible Human: Nightjars: A regular doctor who gets to spend 10 minutes for an office visit with a patient really isn't going to have the time (and possibly the training and knowledge) to appropriately assess a patient for these types of conditions.

Which is why a good doctors office will offer those services. The place where my mom goes to her primary care doctor also has a psych guy that comes in twice a week and if you're a patient there you have to see him every 1-3 months,he's the one that offered me free counseling but I'm terrified of telling him some of the things that bother me.


That's not a "good" doctor's office - that's an "exceptional" doctor's office. I've never been to an office that did that, neither has my wife, nor my sister, nor anyone else I could ping on Google Talk in the time it took to write this post.
 
2013-02-14 02:23:12 PM  
Alcohol always works for me.


upload.wikimedia.org
//Hotter than Penny
 
2013-02-14 02:23:19 PM  

LasersHurt: WhippingBoy: Shyla: This headline affects every person between 15 and 29. They ALL have "social disorders" suddenly.

I've noticed that too... no one views the various obstacles they face as challenges to be overcome anymore. Instead they demand that they be treated as a "special class" and demand that society cater to their challenges.

Personal character, whatever happened to ye?

Do you know how dumb that post sounds, considering that the article is about people taking steps to improve their social anxiety? They are LITERALLY trying to "overcome" their "obstacles."


Why do they need to let everyone know about it?

/I have a cognitive processing disorder that affects some of the things I write and say (honest). Where's my money???
 
2013-02-14 02:24:19 PM  

WhippingBoy: LasersHurt: WhippingBoy: Shyla: This headline affects every person between 15 and 29. They ALL have "social disorders" suddenly.

I've noticed that too... no one views the various obstacles they face as challenges to be overcome anymore. Instead they demand that they be treated as a "special class" and demand that society cater to their challenges.

Personal character, whatever happened to ye?

Do you know how dumb that post sounds, considering that the article is about people taking steps to improve their social anxiety? They are LITERALLY trying to "overcome" their "obstacles."

Why do they need to let everyone know about it?


It's GROUP THERAPY. That's why they "need to let people know about it." They do it together.

Or do you mean "why is there an article about it?" That's really a question for the author, though.
 
2013-02-14 02:25:44 PM  

my herniated disc: what about social laziness disorder?  Can someone give me an insta-extrovert, bubbly, eyelash batting, flirtacious pill??  That facade is so much work and I am way to lazy to bother with it.


the generic is called booze. there are myriad brand names to choose from.
 
2013-02-14 02:26:54 PM  
WhippingBoy:/I have a cognitive processing disorder that affects some of the things I write and say (honest). Where's my money???

I missed the part where the people who are going through this program are asking for money.
 
2013-02-14 02:28:06 PM  

Nightjars: WhippingBoy:/I have a cognitive processing disorder that affects some of the things I write and say (honest). Where's my money???

I missed the part where the people who are going through this program are asking for money.


Same place where they're getting pills and getting out of highschool tests.

IN SOMEONE'S MIND
 
2013-02-14 02:28:43 PM  

Nightjars: WhippingBoy:/I have a cognitive processing disorder that affects some of the things I write and say (honest). Where's my money???

I missed the part where the people who are going through this program are asking for money.


Group Therapists ain't free!
 
2013-02-14 02:30:00 PM  

Prank Call of Cthulhu: Side effects of Extravertofil may include ill-advised posting of embarrassing pictures on Facebook, beer goggling, hangovers, regrettable hookups, skeletal xylophoning, and REO speedlung. Women who are pregnant should not use Extravertofil because nobody wants to hit that. In rare instances, hard partying lasting more than 16 hours may occur. Seek medical attention immediately if this happens to you. Alcoholics and narcotics users should not use Extravertofil as its active ingredients are alcohol and cocaine.


Not that I am on the hunt for pregnant girls, but I totally wanted to tap that ass of my ex wife when she was preggers with our kid.
 
2013-02-14 02:30:23 PM  
 
2013-02-14 02:30:49 PM  

A Terrible Human: Nightjars: A regular doctor who gets to spend 10 minutes for an office visit with a patient really isn't going to have the time (and possibly the training and knowledge) to appropriately assess a patient for these types of conditions.

Which is why a good doctors office will offer those services. The place where my mom goes to her primary care doctor also has a psych guy that comes in twice a week and if you're a patient there you have to see him every 1-3 months,he's the one that offered me free counseling but I'm terrified of telling him some of the things that bother me.


Am I reading that correctly?

You go to a doctor that REQUIRES you to speak with a psychiatrist every few months?
 
2013-02-14 02:32:16 PM  
Psychiatric medications are huge business, especially in this country.  As others pointed out, the pharmaceutical industry has a huge incentive to increase their usage, and provides free samples, sponsors conventions, etc.  In 2011, the top 10 psychiatric drugs accounted for http://pubs.acs.org/doi/full/10.1021/cn3000923 267.1  million prescriptions filled, and that number grows every year.

There's something seriously wrong here. And it's not that America was a vast, undiagnosed, mentally ill country 30, or 50, or 75 years ago.
 
2013-02-14 02:32:34 PM  

Lord Dimwit: That's not a "good" doctor's office - that's an "exceptional" doctor's office. I've never been to an office that did that, neither has my wife, nor my sister, nor anyone else I could ping on Google Talk in the time it took to write this post.


I know anecdotal evidence is anecdotal. Those guys are really awesome that way but I think it's mostly due to them covering their asses because they write prescriptions for pain meds,Dr.Siler was very nice when I met him while at my mom's appointment for her primary care guy.
 
2013-02-14 02:34:39 PM  
There's these guys out there convinced that women are some strange mystical creatures who are so totally alien & mysterious you can never ever understand them. Then they think they have to follow all these steps like its a magic ritual & all of a sudden the girl will fall in love you for saying certain phrases and performing certain actions. Never crosses their minds that they're just other humans beings. They believe in fantasy fiction bullshiat.
 
2013-02-14 02:36:15 PM  
I'm sorry, but this needs to be re-posted
25.media.tumblr.com
 
2013-02-14 02:36:17 PM  

Clock Spider Jerusalem: There's these guys out there convinced that women are some strange mystical creatures who are so totally alien & mysterious you can never ever understand them. Then they think they have to follow all these steps like its a magic ritual & all of a sudden the girl will fall in love you for saying certain phrases and performing certain actions. Never crosses their minds that they're just other humans beings. They believe in fantasy fiction bullshiat.


PUA's are hilarious.

doczoidberg: Am I reading that correctly?

You go to a doctor that REQUIRES you to speak with a psychiatrist every few months?


My mom actually but is has a shiatload to do with them covering their asses because southeast KY's pill abuse problem.
 
2013-02-14 02:38:13 PM  
SAD tag broken?
 
2013-02-14 02:38:26 PM  
i.imgur.com
 
2013-02-14 02:39:18 PM  

ArkPanda: Second, general practitioners diagnosing mental illness is often not a great idea. Some mental illnesses are pretty cut and dried, like seasonal affective disorder. Others are very complex, like OCD, ADHD, bipolar, etc. If a person doesn't spend time with an appropriate specialist to get an appropriate medical opinion, you're going to end up with a lot of false diagnosis situations. A regular doctor who gets to spend 10 minutes for an office visit with a patient really isn't going to have the time (and possibly the training and knowledge) to appropriately assess a patient for these types of conditions.


Very much this. In college, I complained of ADHD symptoms to a local GP doctor and she literally threw Strattera at me.

After being pestered by my parents, eventually I went to the psych department for testing. The department threw me into a battery of tests and told me I had some symptoms, but wasn't diagnosed with ADHD.

I'll also say that licensed specialists treat mental disorders much differently from GPs. They're also much better ad ferreting out effective treatments besides just throwing pills at people.

/end csb
 
2013-02-14 02:40:40 PM  
www.leveledmag.com

can talk to women
 
2013-02-14 02:41:57 PM  
I would totally sign up for that class to gain some confidence when talking with women at events and bars. I do tend toward shyness and I would probably gain greater deep connections.

My wife might disagree with the choice.
 
2013-02-14 02:43:26 PM  
25.media.tumblr.com
I've had good results with ether...
 
2013-02-14 02:44:02 PM  
I see how this works: person A has debilitating social anxiety which prevents them forming relationships the usual way because that involves interacting with strangers.  However if charged for the experience and told it will help them manage said disorder, shy person will suddenly drop all their inhibitions, spend time with a bunch of strangers and tell them of their personal difficulties.  I see a money-making opportunity for all of you with "shy" friends, relatives and co-workers - make them pay you for socializing with them.  They will feel in control of their affliction and you will get free drinks/dinner.
 
2013-02-14 02:45:08 PM  
What a therapy session may look like:


/sign me up
 
2013-02-14 02:50:39 PM  
I don't know what all of the hate is about.  While I don't personally believe in taking drugs for something of this nature (at least for myself), I don't see what's wrong with seeking help on improving yourself in hopes that it will make you happier or aid you in doing things in life you wouldn't normally be able to do.  I don't need help with dating, but I've thought about trying to go to someone who can help me be more outgoing and less shy on a personal and professional level.  I tend to be passive, timid, and apologetic because it's how I've been my entire life.  It's not exactly a recipe for success.  I try to force myself to be more outgoing but it always ends up coming out wrong in some way (awkward or overly assertive).  I'm not sure why it would be wrong to seek help in changing this.  It might not work, but it's worth a try.
 
2013-02-14 02:51:26 PM  

Spaced Cowboy: What a therapy session may look like:


/sign me up


OK, so Fark hates all of my hotlinks, so have a regular link.  http://images2.fanpop.com/image/photos/11000000/Blades-of-Glory-jenna - fischer-11015863-853-480.jpg
 
2013-02-14 02:52:13 PM  
It's times like this that call for the wisdom of Three Amigos

"In a way, all of us has an El Guapo to face. For some, shyness might be their El Guapo. For others, a lack of education might be their El Guapo. For us, El Guapo is a big, dangerous man who wants to kill us. But as sure as my name is Lucky Day, the people of Santa Poco can conquer their own personal El Guapo, who also happens to be *the actual* El Guapo!"
 
2013-02-14 02:52:21 PM  

ACunningPlan: person A has debilitating social anxiety which prevents them forming relationships the usual way because that involves interacting with strangers. However if charged for the experience and told it will help them manage said disorder, shy person will suddenly drop all their inhibitions, spend time with a bunch of strangers and tell them of their personal difficulties.


This is exactly why I haven't gone to the free counseling I was offered.
 
2013-02-14 02:53:59 PM  

LowbrowDeluxe: TaterTot_HotDish: As a woman who has occasionally been hit on by shy guys: this is awesome.  Can more guys take classes like this?  I fell in love with my husband because he was shy and it was sweet and endearing - other guys I have met have been shy and it was as awkward as a prairie dog farking a hippo.

I will find an opportunity to use this line today.


It's going into my weekly status report if it's the last thing I do.
 
2013-02-14 02:54:42 PM  

Prank Call of Cthulhu: The Stealth Hippopotamus: Is there anything we do now a days that doesn't have a pill to help it along?

Feeling shy? Lonely? New Extravertofil can help you get back in the game by reducing inhibitions and making it easier to engage with the opposite sex. Ask your doctor today if Extravertofil is right for you.

Side effects of Extravertofil may include ill-advised posting of embarrassing pictures on Facebook, beer goggling, hangovers, regrettable hookups, skeletal xylophoning, and REO speedlung. Women who are pregnant should not use Extravertofil because nobody wants to hit that. In rare instances, hard partying lasting more than 16 hours may occur. Seek medical attention immediately if this happens to you. Alcoholics and narcotics users should not use Extravertofil as its active ingredients are alcohol and cocaine.


mygoditsfullofwin.jpg
 
2013-02-14 02:55:16 PM  
4) You really are an asshole subby.
 
2013-02-14 02:56:25 PM  
I want to know when they are going to determine that being an a-hole is a "disorder" and come up with the pill to fix that. I wouldn't mind if a few more people were doped up and less douchey.
 
2013-02-14 03:01:08 PM  
I always got more girls when I wasn't trying to get more girls. Once I decide to just have a fun night with my friends goofing around, the girls seem to appear, sometimes as unwanted distractions. Depends on how much I've had to drink and what drugs are involved.
 
2013-02-14 03:02:22 PM  

AgentBang: I want to know when they are going to determine that being an a-hole is a "disorder" and come up with the pill to fix that. I wouldn't mind if a few more people were doped up and less douchey.


Who are you to say it isn't? *I'm* the Victim™ here. Give me money.
 
2013-02-14 03:04:48 PM  
There is a rather large difference between the kind of shyness you can fix with a little alcohol and a disabling terror of personal interaction.
One of the reasons I started Farking was a hope that anonymous interaction would lead to easier "real" interaction. It didn't work. I seem normal when I interact with people, but that's only due to years of practicing coping strategies. I tried the 'have a few drinks' method for years but found I still couldn't speak to women unless I was so drunk I was incoherent. The only way I can talk to women in public is convine myself of their unavailability. In fact, it's bad enough that I rarely post anything but lame attempts at humor even with the anonymity of Fark. Just typing this personal of a response is causing an anxiety reaction.
To sum up, in spite of being incomprehensible to most, shyness can be debilitating.
 
2013-02-14 03:06:09 PM  

A Terrible Human: ACunningPlan: person A has debilitating social anxiety which prevents them forming relationships the usual way because that involves interacting with strangers. However if charged for the experience and told it will help them manage said disorder, shy person will suddenly drop all their inhibitions, spend time with a bunch of strangers and tell them of their personal difficulties.

This is exactly why I haven't gone to the free counseling I was offered.


Don't blame you:)
 
2013-02-14 03:06:30 PM  

Bartleby the Scrivener: my herniated disc: what about social laziness disorder?  Can someone give me an insta-extrovert, bubbly, eyelash batting, flirtacious pill??  That facade is so much work and I am way to lazy to bother with it.

the generic is called booze. there are myriad brand names to choose from.



Its a fine line... too much makes me tired and even more introverted. (and pukey, a sure social turn-off)


maybe I should try cocaine!  3 million Albertans can't be wrong!
 
vpb [TotalFark]
2013-02-14 03:08:25 PM  

The Stealth Hippopotamus: vpb:

[michelle2005.files.wordpress.com image 300x229]

Yeah that's it. Compare PTSD to shyness. See how that works out for you.

While you're at it compare child prostitution to not given a kid a participation trophy.


Why not?  PTSD isn't any more or less real than Social Anxiety Disorder.  Back then we had ignorant rednecks who claimed that there ws no such thing as PTSD and now we have ignorant clowns who say the same thing about Social Anxiety Disorder.

Times change, but ignorance remains the same.
 
2013-02-14 03:09:41 PM  
Maybe this may help:

contentmarketingtoday.com
 
2013-02-14 03:10:26 PM  

Slaxl: You think shyness is a social disorder that's just been invented recently so someone can make money? That's a bit silly, don't you think?


The disorder is real, but the bar getting lowered and pushed with self-diagnosis so that everyone can cash in is bullshiat.

I guess Aspergers and ADHD are out of fashion now.
 
2013-02-14 03:12:45 PM  
Feeling inferior is something that all of us have had to deal with at times. This is the whole reason behind social anxiety. Not one of us has ever not had this feeling at one time or another. You don't need some dime store doctor to tell you this, get over it, grab some balls from the nutsack and get into having a good time. Face your fears and learn that they're not your fears after all. Stop grasping for being perfect, no one is, we're all goofy and stupid. Let go of it and have a good time. Heck that girl you're talking to is just as self conscious as you are. Let it go. Be safe in knowing that you are who you are and no one, no one, can change you. You are who are and enjoy yourself for just that.....yourself.

/from the beginning of time
 
2013-02-14 03:15:51 PM  

bigbadideasinaction: I guess Aspergers and ADHD are out of fashion now.


If I am not mistaken, the last rev of the DSM did away with aspergers.
 
2013-02-14 03:20:55 PM  
I'd like to thank Subby and a healthy chunk of posters for making me realize this entire time I just needed to man up! All those psych sessions to get over picking up the phone, passing a stranger on the street without crossing it to avoid them, getting so anxious at social events with my (now ex!) wife that I couldn't go anywhere with her, were just money wasted on a corrupt, money grabbing medical field. All the free samples of meds I got until I found the right balance (a nice $4 generic) really drained my pocket-book and lined the corporate coffers of CEOs everywhere.

And don't even mention the psych ward visit!!! What was I thinking, being so depressed that I couldn't function even close to normally in social situations that I tried to end my life. Good thing that was fake too! Nevermind that I have an excellent job, pay my taxes to society, have never been on any sort of government assistance...I'm a gen Y-er! Gimme gimme gimme!

End rant: Some people need pills. As someone who went through 7 different meds before finding the right one, I'm guessing it's not a placebo effect. Therapy is also required though, cognitive is what worked well for me. I still suck socially but you can get to a point where its not terrible. Good enough though. I applaud the people doing this, the best way to get over a fear is to live it. Talking in front of a group with like-minded individuals is an amazing feeling.

tl;dr - fark you subby.
 
2013-02-14 03:23:42 PM  
Now we can engineer a class-action suit against homeopathic placebos.

"Your honor, these zinc pills gave me Social Anxiety Disorder."

"Objection!  There's no way to prove this thing even exists or does anything!  Oh wait, nevermind"
 
2013-02-14 03:23:54 PM  
is there a pill to cure farkers?
 
2013-02-14 03:27:12 PM  
I used to be completely incapable of talking to women.  I'd stutter, blush, and say weird shiat from nervousness if I could even open my mouth at all.  I'd be fine in professional contexts, but just could not socialize.  The problem was only overcome when I learned to adopt a more misogynistic worldview.

Let me explain.

Nervousness talking to women comes from a place where you fear their rejection or forming a negative opinion of you.  If you can convince yourself that they don't matter, you're immune to the sting of rejection.  Who cares what she thinks?  She's just a piece of ass.  After I started thinking this way, I started approaching women.  At first I was terrible, caused a lot of offense, and was slapped more than once.  But flirting is a skill like any other skill, and eventually I learned.  Today I no longer hold women in contempt because I don't need to, the successes I gained being a misogynist gave me the skill set and confidence I needed to stop being one.
 
2013-02-14 03:28:14 PM  

The Stealth Hippopotamus: Slaxl: You think shyness is a social disorder that's just been invented recently so someone can make money? That's a bit silly, don't you think?

it's not that shyness is new. But now it's a "social disorder" that requires pills. I guess hitting the bar with your friends is to hard.

Is there anything we do now a days that doesn't have a pill to help it along?


Go look up the four D's, you idiot. There is in fact a critera for this, and while modern psychology is basically shiat on a stick, it's not so hopeless it outright makes things up.

Also, it's usually not shyness. It's usually nearly having a panic attack in a social situation. That's a bit different.
 
2013-02-14 03:31:56 PM  

PsiChick: The Stealth Hippopotamus: Slaxl: You think shyness is a social disorder that's just been invented recently so someone can make money? That's a bit silly, don't you think?

it's not that shyness is new. But now it's a "social disorder" that requires pills. I guess hitting the bar with your friends is to hard.

Is there anything we do now a days that doesn't have a pill to help it along?

Go look up the four D's, you idiot. There is in fact a critera for this, and while modern psychology is basically shiat on a stick, it's not so hopeless it outright makes things up.

Also, it's usually not shyness. It's usually nearly having a panic attack in a social situation. That's a bit different.


The illnesses defined in the DSM are actually disorders - one of the diagnostic criteria is usually that the illness causes someone to be unable to live their lives or function in society. "Normal" shyness hasn't been pathologized.

The problem is that there's going to be a TV commercial saying "do you sometimes feel awkward in social situations? You should talk to your doctor about drug <xyz>." Some people who aren't actually ill by the DSM definition are going to think "yeah, sometimes I feel awkward in social situations! I should talk to my doctor about drug <xyz>!" This is why we have twice-or-more the incidence of mental illness than the rest of the industrialized world. It also cheapens the diagnosis for people who are genuinely ill.
 
2013-02-14 03:32:51 PM  
JesusJuice:  After I started thinking this way, I started approaching women. At first I was terrible, caused a lot of offense, and was slapped more than once. But flirting is a skill like any other skill, and eventually I learned. Today I no longer hold women in contempt because I don't need to, the successes I gained being a misogynist gave me the skill set and confidence I needed to stop being one.

Jesus.  I hate to ask how you learned to drive, walk down stairs or pour scalding water out of a teakettle.
 
2013-02-14 03:33:48 PM  
I may be shy but.. fark you all.
 
2013-02-14 03:35:10 PM  

PsiChick: Go look up the four D's, you idiot. There is in fact a critera for this, and while modern psychology is basically shiat on a stick, it's not so hopeless it outright makes things up.


Dodge, duck, dive, and dodge?
 
2013-02-14 03:41:13 PM  
Totally agree with the headline.

Pretty much all psychological "disorders" are bullshiat.  ADHD?  Bring back corporal punishment and keep the brats in check.  Social anxiety/autism?  Make them get out of the basement once in a while.  Depression?  Stop being sad and smile once in a goddamn while.

Seriously, we're turning into a bunch of pussies.  None of this existed fifteen years ago, it's just a bunch of trendy crap like gluten "allergies".
 
2013-02-14 03:42:50 PM  
Well, I don't have a particular problem, so obviously everyone that claims to have that problem is either making it up or a pussy.
 
2013-02-14 03:46:44 PM  

mutterfark: There is a rather large difference between the kind of shyness you can fix with a little alcohol and a disabling terror of personal interaction.
One of the reasons I started Farking was a hope that anonymous interaction would lead to easier "real" interaction. It didn't work. I seem normal when I interact with people, but that's only due to years of practicing coping strategies. I tried the 'have a few drinks' method for years but found I still couldn't speak to women unless I was so drunk I was incoherent. The only way I can talk to women in public is convine myself of their unavailability. In fact, it's bad enough that I rarely post anything but lame attempts at humor even with the anonymity of Fark. Just typing this personal of a response is causing an anxiety reaction.
To sum up, in spite of being incomprehensible to most, shyness can be debilitating.


Only if you choose to let it be debilitating.  Due to a set of shiatty and ridiculously complicated circumstances, any type of "real" socializing is a complete nightmare for me.  I can do it extremely well, but I would rather eat ground glass, avoid it as much as possible and think "thank christ that's over" when it's finished.  I started Farking for the same reasons; although I'd lurked for years and in a truly perverse way, Fark restored my faith in humanity a bit....make of that what you will.  And when there is a Fark party in my area, I may well attend - out of curiosity:)

The point is I could classify myself as shy or having a social anxiety disorder and blame those traits for the difficulty.  In reality, it's a choice.  Is it a good one? Maybe not, but handing over money &/or taking pills to "fix" me, likewise seems a bit daft.  Not saying all mental illnesses &/or disorders aren't real, or treatable with appropriate therapies.  Just that some of what's peddled as needing help or medication is exaggerated.
 
2013-02-14 03:54:30 PM  

vpb: Why not? PTSD isn't any more or less real than Social Anxiety Disorder. Back then we had ignorant rednecks who claimed that there ws no such thing as PTSD and now we have ignorant clowns who say the same thing about Social Anxiety Disorder.

Times change, but ignorance remains the same.



Yeah PTSD is brought on by people going to war. Social Anxiety Disorder is bought on by normal day activity that is suddenly feeling of unhappiness and they cause you to be shy. Some days I dont feel like the Commander of the Universe that I am maybe I should call my doctor and get a thousand count bottle shipped to my house.

PsiChick: Go look up the four D's, you idiot.


Easy there. You dont want to hurt my self esteem.

PsiChick: There is in fact a critera for this, and while modern psychology is basically shiat on a stick, it's not so hopeless it outright makes things up.

Also, it's usually not shyness. It's usually nearly having a panic attack in a social situation. That's a bit different.



Yes there is a difference and I have never ever said anything about panic attacks. I've been talking about shyness. That's why I type the world shyness. Because you know I'm talking about shyness. shyness.

If you're just feeling shy buck up and get going. Or be shy! It's not a problem you need to fix by pumping your body full of drugs. Like I asked before do we really want to drug everyone up so they fit into our little mold of a perfect person? My wife is shy. I think it's cute. If I could give her a pill to turn her into a social butterfly I wouldn't.

Lord Dimwit: The problem is that there's going to be a TV commercial saying "do you sometimes feel awkward in social situations? You should talk to your doctor about drug <xyz>." Some people who aren't actually ill by the DSM definition are going to think "yeah, sometimes I feel awkward in social situations! I should talk to my doctor about drug <xyz>!" This is why we have twice-or-more the incidence of mental illness than the rest of the industrialized world. It also cheapens the diagnosis for people who are genuinely ill.


exactly. you got a problem get it fixed. You have a problem talking to girls? welcome to the male species

/type social anxiety drug into Google Images. Hundreds of "welcome to fark" pictures
 
2013-02-14 03:56:20 PM  

tallguywithglasseson: I know right, those losers should feel like it's their fault, after all there is something wrong with them.
If they can't fix themselves and get confident (stupids!), they deserve to feel bad and be lonely.
People who seek help for mental or emotional problems make me sick! Grrr! What happened to all the real men amiright!

[oi49.tinypic.com image 537x357]


Stupid millenials. I weep for this country. Or at least I would, if I were a woman or gay or something.


I can't see the photo (due to work blockies), but I really hope it was a mugshot of a mentally ill person.

For those saying to "JUST" go and talk to people, you clearly have never hung out with a person as shy as they're describing.
 
2013-02-14 03:56:25 PM  
I feel anxious talking to women because I feel entitled to sex every time I talk to them, but in reality that hardly ever happens.  Subby is right to rail on people who have social anxiety because they are all men and men don't deserve compassion ever because of millions of years of privilege and oppressing women.  I blame feminism for this situation, things were so much better back in the 50's when women were all docile chattel and didn't have the right to vote.  Men have evolved over millions of years to have dominance over women, but now we are lost without those readymade roles therefore social anxiety has become prevalent.  I mean why is rape even illegal?  Any man who is honest with himself would agree with me:  cisgender scum our patriarchy because that heteronormative wharrgbl sdf dsljksdlfkj woeiu sjfldsdk dlsjljklk...
 
2013-02-14 03:59:17 PM  
Is it the image filter at work or have there been no Magnolia references yet?
 
2013-02-14 03:59:44 PM  

The Stealth Hippopotamus: Lord Dimwit: The problem is that there's going to be a TV commercial saying "do you sometimes feel awkward in social situations? You should talk to your doctor about drug <xyz>." Some people who aren't actually ill by the DSM definition are going to think "yeah, sometimes I feel awkward in social situations! I should talk to my doctor about drug <xyz>!" This is why we have twice-or-more the incidence of mental illness than the rest of the industrialized world. It also cheapens the diagnosis for people who are genuinely ill.

exactly. you got a problem get it fixed. You have a problem talking to girls? welcome to the male species


For the record, you're misinterpreting what I'm saying. What I was trying to say is that, while Social Anxiety Disorder (for example), is an actual illness, the pharmaceutical companies are going to run ads with intentionally vaguer symptoms than those required for diagnosis, in the hopes that some not-actually-ill patients will talk to their doctors about a disease they don't actually have, while simultaneously giving doctors free samples and other perks in the hopes of getting a new prescription written.

Long story short: SAD exists, but pharmaceutical companies are not above making patients and doctors the diagnostic criteria are looser than they are.
 
2013-02-14 04:01:41 PM  

Dion Fortune: I feel anxious talking to women because I feel entitled to sex every time I talk to them, but in reality that hardly ever happens.  Subby is right to rail on people who have social anxiety because they are all men and men don't deserve compassion ever because of millions of years of privilege and oppressing women.  I blame feminism for this situation, things were so much better back in the 50's when women were all docile chattel and didn't have the right to vote.  Men have evolved over millions of years to have dominance over women, but now we are lost without those readymade roles therefore social anxiety has become prevalent.  I mean why is rape even illegal?  Any man who is honest with himself would agree with me:  cisgender scum our patriarchy because that heteronormative wharrgbl sdf dsljksdlfkj woeiu sjfldsdk dlsjljklk...


Very nice.
 
2013-02-14 04:04:10 PM  

ACunningPlan: mutterfark: There is a rather large difference between the kind of shyness you can fix with a little alcohol and a disabling terror of personal interaction.
One of the reasons I started Farking was a hope that anonymous interaction would lead to easier "real" interaction. It didn't work. I seem normal when I interact with people, but that's only due to years of practicing coping strategies. I tried the 'have a few drinks' method for years but found I still couldn't speak to women unless I was so drunk I was incoherent. The only way I can talk to women in public is convine myself of their unavailability. In fact, it's bad enough that I rarely post anything but lame attempts at humor even with the anonymity of Fark. Just typing this personal of a response is causing an anxiety reaction.
To sum up, in spite of being incomprehensible to most, shyness can be debilitating.

Only if you choose to let it be debilitating.  Due to a set of shiatty and ridiculously complicated circumstances, any type of "real" socializing is a complete nightmare for me.  I can do it extremely well, but I would rather eat ground glass, avoid it as much as possible and think "thank christ that's over" when it's finished.  I started Farking for the same reasons; although I'd lurked for years and in a truly perverse way, Fark restored my faith in humanity a bit....make of that what you will.  And when there is a Fark party in my area, I may well attend - out of curiosity:)

The point is I could classify myself as shy or having a social anxiety disorder and blame those traits for the difficulty.  In reality, it's a choice.  Is it a good one? Maybe not, but handing over money &/or taking pills to "fix" me, likewise seems a bit daft.  Not saying all mental illnesses &/or disorders aren't real, or treatable with appropriate therapies.  Just that some of what's peddled as needing help or medication is exaggerated.


 Not going to dispute most of what you wrote, but choice is a difficult word here. I am much better at 48 than I was at 18. As they say now, 'It gets better'. But there was no 'choice' in the begining. It took being exposed to people who had made it through for me to believe that I could get better. Then years of working on the problem.
I was just pointing out that from my experience shyness can be debilitaing, not that it has to stay that way.
 
2013-02-14 04:05:02 PM  

The Stealth Hippopotamus: Slaxl: You think shyness is a social disorder that's just been invented recently so someone can make money? That's a bit silly, don't you think?

it's not that shyness is new. But now it's a "social disorder" that requires pills. I guess hitting the bar with your friends is to hard.

Is there anything we do now a days that doesn't have a pill to help it along?


If you're shy you're going to struggle to a) have friends in the first place, b) go to bars.
 
2013-02-14 04:10:14 PM  
I'm really bad to the point where I don't talk to unavailable unfamiliar people. My personal treatment is start going alone to events. Eventually I'll have to talk to someone.

/right?
 
2013-02-14 04:10:29 PM  
Sounds like Fark, only there's no counseling here, only bitterness.
 
2013-02-14 04:11:29 PM  

AngryPanda: I'm really bad to the point where I can barely talk to unavailable unfamiliar people. My personal treatment is start going alone to events. Eventually I'll have to talk to someone.

/right?


FTFM
 
2013-02-14 04:13:39 PM  

Lord Dimwit: For the record, you're misinterpreting what I'm saying. What I was trying to say is that, while Social Anxiety Disorder (for example), is an actual illness, the pharmaceutical companies are going to run ads with intentionally vaguer symptoms than those required for diagnosis, in the hopes that some not-actually-ill patients will talk to their doctors about a disease they don't actually have, while simultaneously giving doctors free samples and other perks in the hopes of getting a new prescription written.

Long story short: SAD exists, but pharmaceutical companies are not above making patients and doctors the diagnostic criteria are looser than they are.



I think that exactly what I said. All be it in a very condensed way. If you really have a problem, a really real problem then go to a doctor/profession and get help. If you just feel a little shy buck up little soldier and carry on. Here's a little test: If you're at the bar with friends and you don't talk to the pretty girl because you're scared of rejection you dont need a pill. You're huddled in a corner and you've been crying for the last hour because you have to go to the store to buy food, you need a pill.
 
2013-02-14 04:20:46 PM  
As long as I have something external to blame my faults on, I never have to work on improving myself.
 
2013-02-14 04:23:04 PM  

fireclown: If I am not mistaken, the last rev of the DSM did away with aspergers.


Well you are mistaken. The people who wrote the DSM5 just came to the conclusion that "Autism", "Asperger's", and "PDD-NOS" were redundant classifications of the same disorder.

They removed the category of "Asperger's", but that doesn't in any way imply that people diagnosed as having Asperger's don't have something. People diagnosed with "Asperger's" are now just called "autistic". They have "Autism Spectrum Disorder", a.k.a. "Autism".
 
2013-02-14 04:24:42 PM  

The Stealth Hippopotamus: it's not that shyness is new. But now it's a "social disorder" that requires pills. I guess hitting the bar with your friends is to hard.


Real shy people don't have friends
 
2013-02-14 04:25:46 PM  

ACunningPlan: mutterfark: There is a rather large difference between the kind of shyness you can fix with a little alcohol and a disabling terror of personal interaction.
One of the reasons I started Farking was a hope that anonymous interaction would lead to easier "real" interaction. It didn't work. I seem normal when I interact with people, but that's only due to years of practicing coping strategies. I tried the 'have a few drinks' method for years but found I still couldn't speak to women unless I was so drunk I was incoherent. The only way I can talk to women in public is convine myself of their unavailability. In fact, it's bad enough that I rarely post anything but lame attempts at humor even with the anonymity of Fark. Just typing this personal of a response is causing an anxiety reaction.
To sum up, in spite of being incomprehensible to most, shyness can be debilitating.

Only if you choose to let it be debilitating.  Due to a set of shiatty and ridiculously complicated circumstances, any type of "real" socializing is a complete nightmare for me.  I can do it extremely well, but I would rather eat ground glass, avoid it as much as possible and think "thank christ that's over" when it's finished.  I started Farking for the same reasons; although I'd lurked for years and in a truly perverse way, Fark restored my faith in humanity a bit....make of that what you will.  And when there is a Fark party in my area, I may well attend - out of curiosity:)

The point is I could classify myself as shy or having a social anxiety disorder and blame those traits for the difficulty.  In reality, it's a choice.  Is it a good one? Maybe not, but handing over money &/or taking pills to "fix" me, likewise seems a bit daft.  Not saying all mental illnesses &/or disorders aren't real, or treatable with appropriate therapies.  Just that some of what's peddled as needing help or medication is exaggerated.


except social anxiety is more than just shyness, it can be accompanied by debilitating physical reactions.. (like full on panic attacks) So yeah, maybe you could classify yourself as shy, but a full blown anxiety disorder? not so much.  I believe that actual disorder is more akin to pstd.. I don't think folks can just "will" themselves out of pstd symptoms.

There may be plenty of people who don't actually have an anxiety disorder  but still self-diagnose and self-medicate needlessly. That does not mean the actual disorder doesn't really exist.

I think its completely bizarre how drug companies can just advertise on tv, pretty much making up any random crap and offering pills for it. It de-legitimizes people who have genuine afflictions and need help.
 
2013-02-14 04:29:04 PM  

I drunk what: is there a pill to cure farkers?


img.fark.net
 
2013-02-14 04:33:37 PM  
Hah, I came back to check in and it was pretty much what I expected...lotta herp...lotta derp...kinda funny, kinda sad.
 
2013-02-14 04:37:44 PM  

Smelly Pirate Hooker: Sounds like Fark, only there's no counseling here, only bitterness.


It's not Fark, it's reality. Let it go........
 
2013-02-14 04:38:18 PM  

mutterfark: ACunningPlan: mutterfark: There is a rather large difference between the kind of shyness you can fix with a little alcohol and a disabling terror of personal interaction.
One of the reasons I started Farking was a hope that anonymous interaction would lead to easier "real" interaction. It didn't work. I seem normal when I interact with people, but that's only due to years of practicing coping strategies. I tried the 'have a few drinks' method for years but found I still couldn't speak to women unless I was so drunk I was incoherent. The only way I can talk to women in public is convine myself of their unavailability. In fact, it's bad enough that I rarely post anything but lame attempts at humor even with the anonymity of Fark. Just typing this personal of a response is causing an anxiety reaction.
To sum up, in spite of being incomprehensible to most, shyness can be debilitating.

Only if you choose to let it be debilitating.  Due to a set of shiatty and ridiculously complicated circumstances, any type of "real" socializing is a complete nightmare for me.  I can do it extremely well, but I would rather eat ground glass, avoid it as much as possible and think "thank christ that's over" when it's finished.  I started Farking for the same reasons; although I'd lurked for years and in a truly perverse way, Fark restored my faith in humanity a bit....make of that what you will.  And when there is a Fark party in my area, I may well attend - out of curiosity:)

The point is I could classify myself as shy or having a social anxiety disorder and blame those traits for the difficulty.  In reality, it's a choice.  Is it a good one? Maybe not, but handing over money &/or taking pills to "fix" me, likewise seems a bit daft.  Not saying all mental illnesses &/or disorders aren't real, or treatable with appropriate therapies.  Just that some of what's peddled as needing help or medication is exaggerated.

 Not going to dispute most of what you wrote, but choice is a difficult wo ...


Pretty much agree with you.  There is one very simple rule to remember: always get the other person to talk about themselves &/or what interests them - most people will oblige & as for the rest, no-one ever gets along with everyone:)
 
2013-02-14 04:42:56 PM  

mutterfark: There is a rather large difference between the kind of shyness you can fix with a little alcohol and a disabling terror of personal interaction.
One of the reasons I started Farking was a hope that anonymous interaction would lead to easier "real" interaction. It didn't work. I seem normal when I interact with people, but that's only due to years of practicing coping strategies. I tried the 'have a few drinks' method for years but found I still couldn't speak to women unless I was so drunk I was incoherent. The only way I can talk to women in public is convine myself of their unavailability. In fact, it's bad enough that I rarely post anything but lame attempts at humor even with the anonymity of Fark. Just typing this personal of a response is causing an anxiety reaction.
To sum up, in spite of being incomprehensible to most, shyness can be debilitating.



Wrong answer, if your able to type out your thoughts then your able to speak them. You did a real nice try at attempting to be "shy", but, your trying to convince the wrong people. The only one you need to deal with is yourself.
 
2013-02-14 04:47:04 PM  
I am ridiculously shy and got worse as I got further along in my 20's, worked through it without drugs and now, I'm a crazy shy guy with a wife and a kid.  Now at one point I got panic attacks.  THAT shiat is REAL.  Shyness?  As a disease?  Not so much.  I'd buy depression.  I'd buy crazy.  I'd buy being so farking shy it makes you crazy, but general shyness is just a part of life.
 
2013-02-14 04:49:27 PM  
4.bp.blogspot.com

/All anyone needs to know about shyness and depression.
//Suck it up, nancy boys.
///Slashies are AWESOME.
 
2013-02-14 04:53:30 PM  

my herniated disc: ACunningPlan: mutterfark: There is a rather large difference between the kind of shyness you can fix with a little alcohol and a disabling terror of personal interaction.
One of the reasons I started Farking was a hope that anonymous interaction would lead to easier "real" interaction. It didn't work. I seem normal when I interact with people, but that's only due to years of practicing coping strategies. I tried the 'have a few drinks' method for years but found I still couldn't speak to women unless I was so drunk I was incoherent. The only way I can talk to women in public is convine myself of their unavailability. In fact, it's bad enough that I rarely post anything but lame attempts at humor even with the anonymity of Fark. Just typing this personal of a response is causing an anxiety reaction.
To sum up, in spite of being incomprehensible to most, shyness can be debilitating.

Only if you choose to let it be debilitating.  Due to a set of shiatty and ridiculously complicated circumstances, any type of "real" socializing is a complete nightmare for me.  I can do it extremely well, but I would rather eat ground glass, avoid it as much as possible and think "thank christ that's over" when it's finished.  I started Farking for the same reasons; although I'd lurked for years and in a truly perverse way, Fark restored my faith in humanity a bit....make of that what you will.  And when there is a Fark party in my area, I may well attend - out of curiosity:)

The point is I could classify myself as shy or having a social anxiety disorder and blame those traits for the difficulty.  In reality, it's a choice.  Is it a good one? Maybe not, but handing over money &/or taking pills to "fix" me, likewise seems a bit daft.  Not saying all mental illnesses &/or disorders aren't real, or treatable with appropriate therapies.  Just that some of what's peddled as needing help or medication is exaggerated.

except social anxiety is more than just shyness, it can be accompanied by debilitating physical reactions.. (like full on panic attacks) So yeah, maybe you could classify yourself as shy, but a full blown anxiety disorder? not so much.  I believe that actual disorder is more akin to pstd.. I don't think folks can just "will" themselves out of pstd symptoms.
There may be plenty of people who don't actually have an anxiety disorder  but still self-diagnose and self-medicate needlessly. That does not mean the actual disorder doesn't really exist.

I think its completely bizarre how drug companies can just advertise on tv, pretty much making up any random crap and offering pills for it. It de-legitimizes people who have genuine afflictions and need help.

 ...
To be fair, I didn't say the disorder didn't exist and there are a lot of factors involved as to how it manifests and can affect someone; age, cause etc., etc.  Someone who has truly debilitating difficulties is unlikely to be able to attend group therapy sessions in the first place, so I think the setup in TFA isn't referring to those types of people.  But actually yes you can "will" yourself out of ptsd symptoms - depending on the severity of course - because life goes on and survival is a very powerful instinct.  All one has to do is establish what the cost might be & the pay-off - ensuring that the latter is worth the former and then you're good to go and one endures the downside for however long is necessary.

Agree with you on the drug companies & t.v. stuff.
 
2013-02-14 05:02:28 PM  

super_grass: Totally agree with the headline.

Pretty much all psychological "disorders" are bullshiat.  ADHD?  Bring back corporal punishment and keep the brats in check.  Social anxiety/autism?  Make them get out of the basement once in a while.  Depression?  Stop being sad and smile once in a goddamn while.

Seriously, we're turning into a bunch of pussies.  None of this existed fifteen years ago, it's just a bunch of trendy crap like gluten "allergies".


Nobody ever got depressed or had symptoms that could be considered autustic before fifteen years ago? LOL! Sylvia Plath, Ernest Hemingway, Winston Churchill and Isaac Newton think you're a douchepocket.
 
2013-02-14 05:05:56 PM  

Mentat: Do you also think that chronically depressed people just need to suck it up and smile more?


I know you weren't being serious here, but....it worked for me. It's worth a shot.
 
2013-02-14 05:13:04 PM  
Love the trolly headline.  Got the job done well, Subby!

Can't see a workshop helping me though.  Just looking another person in the eyes causes physical pain (have to force myself to stay locked-on, then force myself some more to not stare like a creep due to forcing myself to lock onto their eyes in the first place).  Actually going up to a stranger (especially someone I find attractive) trip my fight-or-flight response, resulting in having to force myself to even say a single word while somehow stopping my legs from bolting in the opposite direction.

Then there's the issue where I am incapable of blind empathy.  I can't "put myself in their shoes" in order to find something to talk about, because until I've already gotten to know them, they are completely empty of any interests at all.  On top of *that* is the problem where I am a tremendous geek.  When somebody states an interest in a particular subject, I can't help but begin conversing about the most esoteric details of the topic.

Oh, and let's not forget how "confidence" is an alien concept.  I mean that literally.  I don't know what it is or how it feels.  I whip myself around a race track on a motorcycle in excess of 160mph, but I can't claim any feeling I might describe as "confidence."  I just do it, while focusing on the minute, exceedingly important details one must manage in order to avoid eating a cement barrier.  When I think about it, I feel quite worried that I'm going to screw up and get mangled.  I love pushing my own limits on/in machines though, so I keep going back to track days on my bike, in my car, or at the kart track.

Nobody's been able to tell me what's wrong with me, but then again I grew up in the 80's before anybody gave a damn.  All I was ever told was "NUT UP!"

tl;dr - socializing with strangers causes physical and psychological trauma, as does expressing feelings of attraction, and there's no way to get around those pains.  Not even booze helps in the slightest.
 
2013-02-14 05:14:48 PM  

CutBoard: mutterfark: There is a rather large difference between the kind of shyness you can fix with a little alcohol and a disabling terror of personal interaction.
One of the reasons I started Farking was a hope that anonymous interaction would lead to easier "real" interaction. It didn't work. I seem normal when I interact with people, but that's only due to years of practicing coping strategies. I tried the 'have a few drinks' method for years but found I still couldn't speak to women unless I was so drunk I was incoherent. The only way I can talk to women in public is convine myself of their unavailability. In fact, it's bad enough that I rarely post anything but lame attempts at humor even with the anonymity of Fark. Just typing this personal of a response is causing an anxiety reaction.
To sum up, in spite of being incomprehensible to most, shyness can be debilitating.


Wrong answer, if your able to type out your thoughts then your able to speak them. You did a real nice try at attempting to be "shy", but, your trying to convince the wrong people. The only one you need to deal with is yourself.


Wrong answer? Attempting to be shy? I have worked very hard to be where I am today and will continue to work at improvement until I die. As for being able to post here? Are you telling me you can't see a world of difference between an ordinary face to face interaction and anonymous chatting on Fark?
 
2013-02-14 05:19:52 PM  
Hey look! It's a thread full of sociopathic assholes who've never had a panic attack and have no empathy for those who have!

/welcome_to_fark.jpg
 
2013-02-14 05:23:12 PM  

Kuroshin: tl;dr - socializing with strangers causes physical and psychological trauma, as does expressing feelings of attraction, and there's no way to get around those pains.  Not even booze helps in the slightest.


The only way to get over the fear of rejection is constant rejection. It really sucks. Some people are born salesmen - they have the ability to shrug off embarrassment or rejection with ease. Some people can learn to do this after a lot of hard and painful experience with it. Some people can't ever force themselves through the process. I see it in similar terms to track - some people are born to run, some people can learn to run, and some people can't ever get comfortable with running. Unfortunately, skills and abilities are not evenly distributed through the population. I would be willing to bet that you *could*, after taking an enormous amount of psychological trauma, lose at least some of your shyness. The question is, would the result be worth what you have to go through to get there?
 
2013-02-14 05:25:56 PM  

super_grass: [4.bp.blogspot.com image 500x500]

/All anyone needs to know about shyness and depression.
//Suck it up, nancy boys.
///Slashies are AWESOME.


Yeah, that's all they need to know. Life isn't puppy dogs and ice cream all the time, dolt.

For the rest of you that talk about us with severe anxiety, saying we're pussies, from the anonymity of internet: Fine. I can assure you, however, that I wouldn't hesitate to give you a knuckle sandwich if you had the balls to say it to my face. I wouldn't be shy about that. I'd be extremely confident about stomping you into the pavement.

Social anxiety does exist.
 
2013-02-14 05:27:09 PM  
www.perlstorm.net

/Q&D
 
2013-02-14 05:30:12 PM  

super_grass: Totally agree with the headline.

Pretty much all psychological "disorders" are bullshiat. ADHD? Bring back corporal punishment and keep the brats in check. Social anxiety/autism? Make them get out of the basement once in a while. Depression? Stop being sad and smile once in a goddamn while.

Seriously, we're turning into a bunch of pussies. None of this existed fifteen years ago, it's just a bunch of trendy crap like gluten "allergies".


Wow. That's pretty uninformed even by fark trolling standards. So here's the deal- since you clearly don't think it will be a problem, why don't we lock you in a room with several paranoid schizophrenics. After all, their hallucinations and delusions are clearly just them being pussies - so they couldn't possibly do anything dangerous right? And if you're right, you'll cure the incurable with the healing powers of your baseless mental health criticism. That'll show em'.
 
2013-02-14 05:30:33 PM  

untaken_name: Mentat: Do you also think that chronically depressed people just need to suck it up and smile more?

I know you weren't being serious here, but....it worked for me. It's worth a shot.


Tried it for 10 years. Didn't work. Now what?
 
2013-02-14 05:33:16 PM  

untaken_name: Kuroshin: tl;dr - socializing with strangers causes physical and psychological trauma, as does expressing feelings of attraction, and there's no way to get around those pains.  Not even booze helps in the slightest.

The only way to get over the fear of rejection is constant rejection. It really sucks. Some people are born salesmen - they have the ability to shrug off embarrassment or rejection with ease. Some people can learn to do this after a lot of hard and painful experience with it. Some people can't ever force themselves through the process. I see it in similar terms to track - some people are born to run, some people can learn to run, and some people can't ever get comfortable with running. Unfortunately, skills and abilities are not evenly distributed through the population. I would be willing to bet that you *could*, after taking an enormous amount of psychological trauma, lose at least some of your shyness. The question is, would the result be worth what you have to go through to get there?


It's not fear.  I never characterized it as such.  I know fear, and I can deal with fear.  Like I said, I send myself whizzing around a race track with nothing between myself and a belt sander but 2mm of leather.  Fear is psychological.  This is neurological.  I can't even look my own wife directly in the eye without massive effort and discomfort.

Also note that I do put in the effort, but it never gets any easier.
 
2013-02-14 05:35:59 PM  

GoSurfing: super_grass: [4.bp.blogspot.com image 500x500]

/All anyone needs to know about shyness and depression.
//Suck it up, nancy boys.
///Slashies are AWESOME.

Yeah, that's all they need to know. Life isn't puppy dogs and ice cream all the time, dolt.

For the rest of you that talk about us with severe anxiety, saying we're pussies, from the anonymity of internet: Fine. I can assure you, however, that I wouldn't hesitate to give you a knuckle sandwich if you had the balls to say it to my face. I wouldn't be shy about that. I'd be extremely confident about stomping you into the pavement.

Social anxiety does exist.


People and animals who have not been socialized properly are dangerous and unpredictable in a social environment.  Short of culling these sick animals, I try to avoid them in general before they shoot up a school or lock themselves in a cabin and lighting it on fire.

Looking at you spaz out in a fit of tardrage only reinforces my point.
 
2013-02-14 05:36:31 PM  

Bartleby the Scrivener: I drunk what: is there a pill to cure farkers?

[img.fark.net image 197x70]


i said cure not cause it
 
2013-02-14 05:39:20 PM  

super_grass: GoSurfing: super_grass: [4.bp.blogspot.com image 500x500]

/All anyone needs to know about shyness and depression.
//Suck it up, nancy boys.
///Slashies are AWESOME.

Yeah, that's all they need to know. Life isn't puppy dogs and ice cream all the time, dolt.

For the rest of you that talk about us with severe anxiety, saying we're pussies, from the anonymity of internet: Fine. I can assure you, however, that I wouldn't hesitate to give you a knuckle sandwich if you had the balls to say it to my face. I wouldn't be shy about that. I'd be extremely confident about stomping you into the pavement.

Social anxiety does exist.

People and animals who have not been socialized properly are dangerous and unpredictable in a social environment.  Short of culling these sick animals, I try to avoid them in general before they shoot up a school or lock themselves in a cabin and lighting it on fire.

Looking at you spaz out in a fit of tardrage only reinforces my point.


Your disillusionment with reality only reinforces my point.
 
2013-02-14 05:40:13 PM  

super_grass: GoSurfing: super_grass: [4.bp.blogspot.com image 500x500]

/All anyone needs to know about shyness and depression.
//Suck it up, nancy boys.
///Slashies are AWESOME.

Yeah, that's all they need to know. Life isn't puppy dogs and ice cream all the time, dolt.

For the rest of you that talk about us with severe anxiety, saying we're pussies, from the anonymity of internet: Fine. I can assure you, however, that I wouldn't hesitate to give you a knuckle sandwich if you had the balls to say it to my face. I wouldn't be shy about that. I'd be extremely confident about stomping you into the pavement.

Social anxiety does exist.

People and animals who have not been socialized properly are dangerous and unpredictable in a social environment.  Short of culling these sick animals, I try to avoid them in general before they shoot up a school or lock themselves in a cabin and lighting it on fire.

Looking at you spaz out in a fit of tardrage only reinforces my point.


Now that's some fine trolling.
 
2013-02-14 05:42:54 PM  

CutBoard: mutterfark: There is a rather large difference between the kind of shyness you can fix with a little alcohol and a disabling terror of personal interaction.
One of the reasons I started Farking was a hope that anonymous interaction would lead to easier "real" interaction. It didn't work. I seem normal when I interact with people, but that's only due to years of practicing coping strategies. I tried the 'have a few drinks' method for years but found I still couldn't speak to women unless I was so drunk I was incoherent. The only way I can talk to women in public is convine myself of their unavailability. In fact, it's bad enough that I rarely post anything but lame attempts at humor even with the anonymity of Fark. Just typing this personal of a response is causing an anxiety reaction.
To sum up, in spite of being incomprehensible to most, shyness can be debilitating.


Wrong answer, if your able to type out your thoughts then your able to speak them. You did a real nice try at attempting to be "shy", but, your trying to convince the wrong people. The only one you need to deal with is yourself.


The internet is fairly anonymous in most places and thus is easier for someone to put forward a little bit of themselves they wouldn't do it in person.

Go back to your cave, troll.
 
2013-02-14 05:42:58 PM  

GoSurfing: super_grass: GoSurfing: super_grass: [4.bp.blogspot.com image 500x500]

/All anyone needs to know about shyness and depression.
//Suck it up, nancy boys.
///Slashies are AWESOME.

Yeah, that's all they need to know. Life isn't puppy dogs and ice cream all the time, dolt.

For the rest of you that talk about us with severe anxiety, saying we're pussies, from the anonymity of internet: Fine. I can assure you, however, that I wouldn't hesitate to give you a knuckle sandwich if you had the balls to say it to my face. I wouldn't be shy about that. I'd be extremely confident about stomping you into the pavement.

Social anxiety does exist.

People and animals who have not been socialized properly are dangerous and unpredictable in a social environment.  Short of culling these sick animals, I try to avoid them in general before they shoot up a school or lock themselves in a cabin and lighting it on fire.

Looking at you spaz out in a fit of tardrage only reinforces my point.

Your disillusionment with reality only reinforces my point.


Wrong word, that's funny right there.
 
2013-02-14 05:43:16 PM  

GoSurfing: super_grass: GoSurfing: super_grass: [4.bp.blogspot.com image 500x500]

/All anyone needs to know about shyness and depression.
//Suck it up, nancy boys.
///Slashies are AWESOME.

Yeah, that's all they need to know. Life isn't puppy dogs and ice cream all the time, dolt.

For the rest of you that talk about us with severe anxiety, saying we're pussies, from the anonymity of internet: Fine. I can assure you, however, that I wouldn't hesitate to give you a knuckle sandwich if you had the balls to say it to my face. I wouldn't be shy about that. I'd be extremely confident about stomping you into the pavement.

Social anxiety does exist.

People and animals who have not been socialized properly are dangerous and unpredictable in a social environment.  Short of culling these sick animals, I try to avoid them in general before they shoot up a school or lock themselves in a cabin and lighting it on fire.

Looking at you spaz out in a fit of tardrage only reinforces my point.

Your disillusionment with reality only reinforces my point.


encrypted-tbn3.gstatic.com

GO - GOSURFING

GOSURFING GOSURFING GOSURFING

go-go-gosurfing
 
2013-02-14 05:45:16 PM  

Kuroshin: untaken_name: Kuroshin: tl;dr - socializing with strangers causes physical and psychological trauma, as does expressing feelings of attraction, and there's no way to get around those pains.  Not even booze helps in the slightest.

The only way to get over the fear of rejection is constant rejection. It really sucks. Some people are born salesmen - they have the ability to shrug off embarrassment or rejection with ease. Some people can learn to do this after a lot of hard and painful experience with it. Some people can't ever force themselves through the process. I see it in similar terms to track - some people are born to run, some people can learn to run, and some people can't ever get comfortable with running. Unfortunately, skills and abilities are not evenly distributed through the population. I would be willing to bet that you *could*, after taking an enormous amount of psychological trauma, lose at least some of your shyness. The question is, would the result be worth what you have to go through to get there?

It's not fear.  I never characterized it as such.  I know fear, and I can deal with fear.  Like I said, I send myself whizzing around a race track with nothing between myself and a belt sander but 2mm of leather.  Fear is psychological.  This is neurological.  I can't even look my own wife directly in the eye without massive effort and discomfort.

Also note that I do put in the effort, but it never gets any easier.


Weird. I didn't notice anything like that about you at the PDX Fark party. You hide it REALLY well.
 
2013-02-14 05:46:19 PM  

ialdabaoth: Tried it for 10 years. Didn't work. Now what?


Well don't give up now!

quitter
 
2013-02-14 05:48:04 PM  

12monkeys: Hey look! It's a thread full of sociopathic assholes who've never had a panic attack and have no empathy for those who have!

/welcome_to_fark.jpg


What's the value of empathy, again?
 
2013-02-14 05:48:55 PM  

The Stealth Hippopotamus: it's not that shyness is new. But now it's a "social disorder" that requires pills. I guess hitting the bar with your friends is to hard.


I know, the cool kids don't RTFA, but its point was that the workshop is designed to teach participants skills and let them practice them to reduce anxiety.  The not-pill nature was mentioned explicitly.
 
2013-02-14 05:50:25 PM  

Kuroshin: Fear is psychological. This is neurological. I can't even look my own wife directly in the eye without massive effort and discomfort.

Also note that I do put in the effort, but it never gets any easier.


Can you identify what exactly about eye contact makes you uncomfortable?
 
2013-02-14 05:50:45 PM  

chrylis: The Stealth Hippopotamus: it's not that shyness is new. But now it's a "social disorder" that requires pills. I guess hitting the bar with your friends is to hard.

I know, the cool kids don't RTFA, but its point was that the workshop is designed to teach participants skills and let them practice them to reduce anxiety.  The not-pill nature was mentioned explicitly.


Pills, not-pills, it's all the same thing: giving weaklings an opportunity to survive in the real world.

Why do we want that, again?
 
2013-02-14 05:51:24 PM  

fusillade762: Kuroshin: untaken_name: Kuroshin: tl;dr - socializing with strangers causes physical and psychological trauma, as does expressing feelings of attraction, and there's no way to get around those pains.  Not even booze helps in the slightest.

The only way to get over the fear of rejection is constant rejection. It really sucks. Some people are born salesmen - they have the ability to shrug off embarrassment or rejection with ease. Some people can learn to do this after a lot of hard and painful experience with it. Some people can't ever force themselves through the process. I see it in similar terms to track - some people are born to run, some people can learn to run, and some people can't ever get comfortable with running. Unfortunately, skills and abilities are not evenly distributed through the population. I would be willing to bet that you *could*, after taking an enormous amount of psychological trauma, lose at least some of your shyness. The question is, would the result be worth what you have to go through to get there?

It's not fear.  I never characterized it as such.  I know fear, and I can deal with fear.  Like I said, I send myself whizzing around a race track with nothing between myself and a belt sander but 2mm of leather.  Fear is psychological.  This is neurological.  I can't even look my own wife directly in the eye without massive effort and discomfort.

Also note that I do put in the effort, but it never gets any easier.

Weird. I didn't notice anything like that about you at the PDX Fark party. You hide it REALLY well.


Or it just blends into the background of nerdiness. ;)

But yeah, I had to really fight.  You probably didn't notice, but I didn't look anybody directly in the eye, and I had been at the bar for at least thirty minutes before wandering over.  But hey, we've also got one thing automatically in common, right?
 
2013-02-14 05:53:36 PM  

chrylis: Kuroshin: Fear is psychological. This is neurological. I can't even look my own wife directly in the eye without massive effort and discomfort.

Also note that I do put in the effort, but it never gets any easier.

Can you identify what exactly about eye contact makes you uncomfortable?


The eye contact.

It's akin to attempting to push like-poled magnets together.  Resistance becomes greater the closer they get, and they want nothing more than to slide away.  It takes greater and greater effort, and there's a physical feeling of pressure just as with magnets.  Then the creeping feeling of panic sets in...
 
2013-02-14 05:55:21 PM  
I'll ask again: if you're successful, and protected against retribution, why is compassion or empathy towards those who are not valuable?
 
2013-02-14 05:55:22 PM  

Kuroshin: super_grass: GoSurfing: super_grass: [4.bp.blogspot.com image 500x500]

/All anyone needs to know about shyness and depression.
//Suck it up, nancy boys.
///Slashies are AWESOME.

Yeah, that's all they need to know. Life isn't puppy dogs and ice cream all the time, dolt.

For the rest of you that talk about us with severe anxiety, saying we're pussies, from the anonymity of internet: Fine. I can assure you, however, that I wouldn't hesitate to give you a knuckle sandwich if you had the balls to say it to my face. I wouldn't be shy about that. I'd be extremely confident about stomping you into the pavement.

Social anxiety does exist.

People and animals who have not been socialized properly are dangerous and unpredictable in a social environment.  Short of culling these sick animals, I try to avoid them in general before they shoot up a school or lock themselves in a cabin and lighting it on fire.

Looking at you spaz out in a fit of tardrage only reinforces my point.

Now that's some fine trolling.


Me, or him? I don't think he's trolling, and I hope I'm not coming across as such. He has a valid point- some people are unpredictable. I know I surely am, just not in a violent sense. I know it may seem like the contrary, but really, call any man in a public place a pussy and guess the outcome. This is the internet, and all of us saying these things from anonymity on fark that we'd never really say to anyone in public...we'll I guess that makes us all pussies.

/The most succinct way of defining social anxiety is being trapped in a negative feedback loop, as others here have touched on.
//Two types of depressed people: those that take it out on others, those that take it out on themselves. I'm the latter.
///I don't medicate. Life is a garden, dig it. I try to overcome anxiety by facing it head-on, every day, as I've done for years now. It's just that nothing "clicks", and I never make any progress.
 
2013-02-14 05:56:25 PM  
I've found that if you buy a few dances the girls will sit and talk to you.

They you can find out if they like your chloroform rag collection.
 
2013-02-14 05:58:40 PM  

Kuroshin: Can you identify what exactly about eye contact makes you uncomfortable?

The eye contact.


Yes, but I was asking whether you noted anything specific about the path.  Have you compared yourself to the list of autistic symptoms, particularly unusual sensitivity to bright lights or loud sounds?
 
2013-02-14 06:05:36 PM  

ialdabaoth: untaken_name: Mentat: Do you also think that chronically depressed people just need to suck it up and smile more?

I know you weren't being serious here, but....it worked for me. It's worth a shot.

Tried it for 10 years. Didn't work. Now what?


I have no idea, I'm sorry. Like I said, it worked for me. Once it worked, I stopped looking for solutions.
 
2013-02-14 06:10:04 PM  

ialdabaoth: I'll ask again: if you're successful, and protected against retribution, why is compassion or empathy towards those who are not valuable?


1) You are never as protected as you think.  You may be successful and safe today, but tomorrow anything may happen.

2) I cannot imagine that I would have any joy or quality of life with compassion and empathy for people around me.  I have no data to back that up, but it seems like it would be the difference between 3D and 2D.
 
2013-02-14 06:11:00 PM  

Kuroshin: Fear is psychological.  This is neurological.


Okay, well, let's get hung up on semantics, then. :) I'm sure that will help! ;) Like I said, skills and abilities aren't evenly distributed. I'll never be a track star, but I can hobble along. Some people can't even do that. Some people could but don't, some people can't. It sounds like you're on the can't side of that. If nothing's working and it is painful to you to try, my advice is to stop trying. You won't be any less shy, but you'll be in less pain.
 
2013-02-14 06:11:59 PM  

The Stealth Hippopotamus: effing makes me sick. You're not like everyone else?! HERE! take a pill.


No one is forcing these people into treatment. These people self-identified a skill they would like to improve and are educating themselves to become more proficient. How can you be upset with that?

As for the pills: you need to refine your point because what you complain about here is exactly what physicians do when treating bodily illness. Have a pulmonary infection -- take a pill. Don't want polio -- take a pill. I assume you don't object to that sort of chemical treatment; if that's the case you need to make a distinction between that sort of pill use and the type of use you don't like.
 
2013-02-14 06:13:01 PM  

Graffito: ialdabaoth: I'll ask again: if you're successful, and protected against retribution, why is compassion or empathy towards those who are not valuable?

1) You are never as protected as you think.  You may be successful and safe today, but tomorrow anything may happen.


Which is why you never pass up an opportunity to crush the downtrodden. The wider the gap, the less likely anyone is to jump it.

2) I cannot imagine that I would have any joy or quality of life with compassion and empathy for people around me.  I have no data to back that up, but it seems like it would be the difference between 3D and 2D.

True, but what if people like it better that way? I mean, judging by human behavior, having contempt for others who are too weak to do anything about it feels GREAT.
 
2013-02-14 06:14:14 PM  

untaken_name: Kuroshin: Fear is psychological.  This is neurological.

Okay, well, let's get hung up on semantics, then. :) I'm sure that will help! ;) Like I said, skills and abilities aren't evenly distributed. I'll never be a track star, but I can hobble along. Some people can't even do that. Some people could but don't, some people can't. It sounds like you're on the can't side of that. If nothing's working and it is painful to you to try, my advice is to stop trying. You won't be any less shy, but you'll be in less pain.


I thought only pussies gave up when it got too hard, and only idiots kept going. (For winners, it just never gets too hard in the first place.)
 
2013-02-14 06:16:40 PM  

ialdabaoth: untaken_name: Kuroshin: Fear is psychological.  This is neurological.

Okay, well, let's get hung up on semantics, then. :) I'm sure that will help! ;) Like I said, skills and abilities aren't evenly distributed. I'll never be a track star, but I can hobble along. Some people can't even do that. Some people could but don't, some people can't. It sounds like you're on the can't side of that. If nothing's working and it is painful to you to try, my advice is to stop trying. You won't be any less shy, but you'll be in less pain.

I thought only pussies gave up when it got too hard, and only idiots kept going. (For winners, it just never gets too hard in the first place.)


It's an equation you're going to have to work out for yourself. It's not that things are easy for winners. It's that people for whom things are easy naturally win. It's a subtle distinction, but important.
 
2013-02-14 06:18:39 PM  
Some fat people have glandular issues, most don't.
 
2013-02-14 06:18:43 PM  

untaken_name: ialdabaoth: untaken_name: Kuroshin: Fear is psychological.  This is neurological.

Okay, well, let's get hung up on semantics, then. :) I'm sure that will help! ;) Like I said, skills and abilities aren't evenly distributed. I'll never be a track star, but I can hobble along. Some people can't even do that. Some people could but don't, some people can't. It sounds like you're on the can't side of that. If nothing's working and it is painful to you to try, my advice is to stop trying. You won't be any less shy, but you'll be in less pain.

I thought only pussies gave up when it got too hard, and only idiots kept going. (For winners, it just never gets too hard in the first place.)

It's an equation you're going to have to work out for yourself. It's not that things are easy for winners. It's that people for whom things are easy naturally win. It's a subtle distinction, but important.


It's a distinction that winners and society don't bother making, so what's the point of making it?
 
2013-02-14 06:19:19 PM  

Champion of the Sun: Some fat people have glandular issues, most don't.


And even the ones that do are better off treated as if they don't, because fark them.
 
2013-02-14 06:22:45 PM  

ialdabaoth: It's a distinction that winners and society don't bother making, so what's the point of making it?


Because "technically" is the best kind of correct? I don't know. I'm not on a forum for winners and society, I'm on Fark.
 
2013-02-14 06:23:20 PM  
As a former shy-guy .....

1) If your mind ever goes blank, ask a question about her/him or comment on something in your proximity.

2) Smile when you're talking. People like to feel that the other person enjoys their company.

3) Make eye-contact when you are speaking with them and hold the eye contact. As a shy person it took me forever to force myself to not look away.

4) Watch your ticks. For me it's leg shaking. If I'm bored or nervous I shake my leg like crazy. People like other people who exude an air of tranquility. (I'm still working on this one)

5) Not everyone is attracted to everyone else. Just because you get rejected doesn't mean you're any less of a person, it just means that particular person didn't feel you were compatible as a lover.

6) Last but not least, watch your mood. Humans are amazing at reading even the smallest body language and can pickup negative signs. So if you're ever feeling down, you need to mentally rally yourself! Tell yourself that you are an amazing person, tell yourself you look fine, and remember that everyone from the President of the United States to Kate Upton to the coworker sitting beside you ... from time to time ... has horrible broken-glass-shiats. The kind where you almost want to cry it's so painful. It'll help you mentally bring everyone to the same level.

Have a fun life!
 
2013-02-14 06:27:54 PM  

The Stealth Hippopotamus: Here's a little test: If you're at the bar with friends and you don't talk to the pretty girl because you're scared of rejection you dont need a pill. You're huddled in a corner and you've been crying for the last hour because you have to go to the store to buy food, you need a pill.


I want beer. I really want beer. I don't have much to do tonight and I enjoy the taste (as well as the general numbness to emotions that comes with the first half of being drunk). Problem is: I don't have any beer. I've been fighting with myself the past few hours just to convince myself to go out because of my social anxiety. Objectively, I know the reward (yummy tasty beer) is far greater than the risk (a few fleeting seconds of social interaction), but in my mind that risk seems insurmountably daunting.
 
2013-02-14 06:46:01 PM  

GoSurfing: Me, or him? I don't think he's trolling, and I hope I'm not coming across as such. He has a valid point- some people are unpredictable. I know I surely am, just not in a violent sense. I know it may seem like the contrary, but really, call any man in a public place a pussy and guess the outcome. This is the internet, and all of us saying these things from anonymity on fark that we'd never really say to anyone in public...we'll I guess that makes us all pussies.



Him.  He's trolling.  It's obvious.  It's de rigueur to post up that stale nonsense in a thread such as this, because plenty of people will bite.  I'm not talking the ITG stuff, but more the "it isn't real durr hurr" bollocks.

chrylis: Kuroshin: Can you identify what exactly about eye contact makes you uncomfortable?

The eye contact.

Yes, but I was asking whether you noted anything specific about the path.  Have you compared yourself to the list of
autistic symptoms, particularly unusual sensitivity to bright lights or loud sounds?



Can't say that I have.  Or at least, I haven't knowingly.  Supposedly there were some autism tests done when I was a young teen, along with tests for learning disorders (had a 1.0GPA).  Kinda laughable, since I was in TAG and out-scored just about everybody else in the State on IQ tests.  Still, I was never made privy to the fact of the tests until very recently, and I was never told what they did or did not find.  My mom said that they ignored the results because at worst I was "high functioning", which they didn't care about (doesn't affect learning), and at best wasn't afflicted with autism at all.  As for bright lights, I *am* photophobic, but that's likely due to two unrelated issues: 1) actual construction of my eye/retina, 2) encephalitis when I was 11.  The photosensitivity didn't really crop up until I was hitting puberty, but with so many other things going on at the time, who's to say what caused it?  There were other signs pointing to possible autism (hyper emotionality, difficulties socializing, compulsive obsession with symmetry, etc.), but like I said, never fully tested or diagnosed.  I'm not the kind of person who puts stock in self-diagnosis of neurological issues, and once I was out on my own I am not the kind of person to spend thousands of dollars just to find a diagnosis that does nothing to change my situation.  Even if I were diagnosed with high-functioning autism, that would just tell me what's wrong without any way of fixing anything.  Waste of money.  Better  to spend it on track days and faster motorcycles.

untaken_name: Kuroshin: Fear is psychological.  This is neurological.

Okay, well, let's get hung up on semantics, then. :) I'm sure that will help! ;) Like I said, skills and abilities aren't evenly distributed. I'll never be a track star, but I can hobble along. Some people can't even do that. Some people could but don't, some people can't. It sounds like you're on the can't side of that. If nothing's working and it is painful to you to try, my advice is to stop trying. You won't be any less shy, but you'll be in less pain.



On the other hand, without trying, I can't socialize at all, and no matter how badly I wish it were otherwise, I suffer the same trauma others do by being shut out from society.  No friends.  No lovers.  Depression.  Self-loathing.  You know, all those things that normal people feel when they get put into solitary confinement.

Gotta keep trying, even though it always ends in failure.  Either that, or buy a bottle of nitrogen and put myself out of my misery.
 
2013-02-14 06:50:01 PM  
I don't have any problem going up to women and talking to them.  It's continuing the conversation as they are screaming and running away that's the hard part.
 
2013-02-14 06:53:16 PM  
>  On the other hand, without trying, I can't socialize at all, and no matter how badly I wish it were otherwise, I suffer the same trauma others do by being shut out from society.  No friends.  No lovers.  Depression.  Self-loathing.  You know, all those things that normal people feel when they get put into solitary confinement.

The difference is, the common judgment is that people like us *deserve* it.

And it's funny.

...well, no, actually, the common consensus is that people like them deserve it too, when they get it. Our society adores the "just world hypothesis".
 
2013-02-14 06:53:36 PM  
Ask your doctor if Shy-Away* is right for you.

*Call your doctor if you experience fever, stiff muscles, confusion, sweating, fast or uneven heartbeats, jerky muscle movements you cannot control, sudden numbness or weakness, headache, confusion, or problems with vision, speech, or balance, fever, chills, body aches, flu symptoms, sores in your mouth and throat, increased thirst or urination, loss of appetite, fruity breath odor, drowsiness, dry skin, nausea, and vomiting, seizure (convulsions), thoughts of hurting yourself, feeling like you might pass out, jaundice (yellowing of your skin or eyes), or urinating less than usual or not at all. You should not take Shy-Away if you're pregnant, having your period, have a pre-existing heart condition, have a history of blood clots or have breathed outside air once in your life.
 
2013-02-14 06:54:34 PM  
There are people who can't leave their house because of anxiety.  When they take a pill, some of these people can leave their house and live normal lives.

Clearly the take away is that they are all scammers who take medication with obnoxious side effects for the attention and that modern psychology is a scam.  There is no chemical reaction that could possibly effect how anxious someone feels or lower their inhibitions.
 
2013-02-14 06:56:23 PM  

HoratioGates: There are people who can't leave their house because of anxiety.  When they take a pill, some of these people can leave their house and live normal lives.

Clearly the take away is that they are all scammers who take medication with obnoxious side effects for the attention and that modern psychology is a scam.  There is no chemical reaction that could possibly effect how anxious someone feels or lower their inhibitions.


No, the take away is "fark them anyways, I don't care how it works because they're farking losers anyways. Anyone who life shiats on is a bad person if I don't feel like helping them."

And you know what? As attitudes go, it *works*. It helps you conserve resources and get ahead in a dog-eat-dog world where everyone else is just as ruthless as you are. And if they aren't, fark 'em.
 
2013-02-14 06:59:52 PM  

ialdabaoth: >  On the other hand, without trying, I can't socialize at all, and no matter how badly I wish it were otherwise, I suffer the same trauma others do by being shut out from society.  No friends.  No lovers.  Depression.  Self-loathing.  You know, all those things that normal people feel when they get put into solitary confinement.

The difference is, the common judgment is that people like us *deserve* it.

And it's funny.

...well, no, actually, the common consensus is that people like them deserve it too, when they get it. Our society adores the "just world hypothesis".


And yet, here we are.  A nation where NASCAR and McDonald's are king, and rampant obesity due to over-indulgence is the norm.  Yup, it truly is a 'just' world.  These are obviously the cutting edge of Humanity.  'Murrica, fark yeah!
 
2013-02-14 07:12:02 PM  

xanadian: FTFA: Not all of tonight's participants have been diagnosed with social anxiety disorder (SAD)

No. SAD is for Seasonal Affective Disorder. GO GET YOUR *OWN* ACRONYM!!!


Came to say this...

/SAD!
 
2013-02-14 07:14:33 PM  
Gmutterfark: CutBoard: mutterfark: There is a rather large difference between the kind of shyness you can fix with a little alcohol and a disabling terror of personal interaction.
One of the reasons I started Farking was a hope that anonymous interaction would lead to easier "real" interaction. It didn't work. I seem normal when I interact with people, but that's only due to years of practicing coping strategies. I tried the 'have a few drinks' method for years but found I still couldn't speak to women unless I was so drunk I was incoherent. The only way I can talk to women in public is convine myself of their unavailability. In fact, it's bad enough that I rarely post anything but lame attempts at humor even with the anonymity of Fark. Just typing this personal of a response is causing an anxiety reaction.
To sum up, in spite of being incomprehensible to most, shyness can be debilitating.


Wrong answer, if your able to type out your thoughts then your able to speak them. You did a real nice try at attempting to be "shy", but, your trying to convince the wrong people. The only one you need to deal with is yourself.

Wrong answer? Attempting to be shy? I have worked very hard to be where I am today and will continue to work at improvement until I die. As for being able to post here? Are you telling me you can't see a world of difference between an ordinary face to face interaction and anonymous chatting on Fark?



Got you to work up and chat. That's a world of difference. Sometimes, it helps to be a little irritated when you're talkting to people, after all, that little irritation, is the same thing that get's you up in the morning and to get going. Congrats.
 
2013-02-14 07:15:12 PM  

CutBoard: Smelly Pirate Hooker: Sounds like Fark, only there's no counseling here, only bitterness.

It's not Fark, it's reality. Let it go........


No, it's Fark. The bitterness is super-concentrated, like Starbucks coffee and long-term marriage.
 
2013-02-14 07:21:24 PM  

Kuroshin: ialdabaoth: >  On the other hand, without trying, I can't socialize at all, and no matter how badly I wish it were otherwise, I suffer the same trauma others do by being shut out from society.  No friends.  No lovers.  Depression.  Self-loathing.  You know, all those things that normal people feel when they get put into solitary confinement.

The difference is, the common judgment is that people like us *deserve* it.

And it's funny.

...well, no, actually, the common consensus is that people like them deserve it too, when they get it. Our society adores the "just world hypothesis".

And yet, here we are.  A nation where NASCAR and McDonald's are king, and rampant obesity due to over-indulgence is the norm.  Yup, it truly is a 'just' world.  These are obviously the cutting edge of Humanity.  'Murrica, fark yeah!


And we still lead the world in prison rape, drone bombings of civilian children, secret torture facilities, nuclear weapons, naval superiority, ground force superiority, and air superiority - so your choices are to be a part of 'Murrica, or raped in the ass by 'Murrica.

"You are under the impression that hatred is more exhausting than love. Why should it be? And if it were, what difference would that make? Suppose that we choose to wear ourselves out faster. Suppose that we quicken the tempo of human life till men are senile at thirty. Still what difference would it make?"
 
2013-02-14 07:50:02 PM  
0.5:  eat a medical marijuana lollipop
1: profit from writing book about scneratio involving parallel universes
 
2013-02-14 07:59:56 PM  

ACunningPlan: my herniated disc: ACunningPlan: mutterfark: There is a rather large difference between the kind of shyness you can fix with a little alcohol and a disabling terror of personal interaction.
One of the reasons I started Farking was a hope that anonymous interaction would lead to easier "real" interaction. It didn't work. I seem normal when I interact with people, but that's only due to years of practicing coping strategies. I tried the 'have a few drinks' method for years but found I still couldn't speak to women unless I was so drunk I was incoherent. The only way I can talk to women in public is convine myself of their unavailability. In fact, it's bad enough that I rarely post anything but lame attempts at humor even with the anonymity of Fark. Just typing this personal of a response is causing an anxiety reaction.
To sum up, in spite of being incomprehensible to most, shyness can be debilitating.

Only if you choose to let it be debilitating.  Due to a set of shiatty and ridiculously complicated circumstances, any type of "real" socializing is a complete nightmare for me.  I can do it extremely well, but I would rather eat ground glass, avoid it as much as possible and think "thank christ that's over" when it's finished.  I started Farking for the same reasons; although I'd lurked for years and in a truly perverse way, Fark restored my faith in humanity a bit....make of that what you will.  And when there is a Fark party in my area, I may well attend - out of curiosity:)

The point is I could classify myself as shy or having a social anxiety disorder and blame those traits for the difficulty.  In reality, it's a choice.  Is it a good one? Maybe not, but handing over money &/or taking pills to "fix" me, likewise seems a bit daft.  Not saying all mental illnesses &/or disorders aren't real, or treatable with appropriate therapies.  Just that some of what's peddled as needing help or medication is exaggerated.

except social anxiety is more than just shyness, it can ...


yeah, fair enough.  in retrospect I see you didn't actually say such disorders don't actually exist.

I think I was reacting to the general lack of compassion and sense of hostility I am seeing on this thread :S.  Of course one doesn't come to fark to see people giving other people the benefit of the doubt!
 
2013-02-14 09:21:24 PM  

Snarcoleptic_Hoosier: Just meeting the people you chat with online is a huge thing. I've made it a bit of a hobby to actually find the people who I screw around with. And, by default, that means I'll have to travel some pretty good distances.


i think that's awesome. not many people venture out like that, it shows a lot of spirit and interest in your fellow mankind. i admire that. if you're ever in No.NJ you're invited to a home cooked, get to meet my new dog.
 
2013-02-14 09:21:39 PM  

Kuroshin: And yet, here we are.  A nation where NASCAR and McDonald's are king, and rampant obesity due to over-indulgence is the norm.  Yup, it truly is a 'just' world.  These are obviously the cutting edge of Humanity.  'Murrica, fark yeah!


Wait, NASCAR?  What does NASCAR have to do with the world being just or unjust?  Does NASCAR involve torturing babies?
 
2013-02-14 09:27:07 PM  
I've seen a psychiatrist because of social anxiety. I'm probably not as bad of a case than many others, I don't need any medication, and talk therapy seems to work pretty well for me. So paying a copay to see a professional for an hour every few weeks to me is definitely worth. I actually like the doctor a lot, and look forward to going there.

For me, talking one-on-one is not a problem at all. Even a group of three people is fine, I can be really outgoing. But once the group gets bigger, it gets really uncomfortable really quickly.

Anyway, there is a certain feedback loop to the whole thing. I realize very well that my anxiety is not reasonable, and I don't want to feel like it. But the realization in a way makes it worse, because you feel less of yourself, so that in turn makes you more vulnerable to the anxiety and even obsessing over wondering how other people are seeing you.

And since feelings come from thoughts, it's easy to see how that would reinforce itself.

But fortunately, for anyone who is living with this kind of condition, you can overcome it. It will require work, but just like you can practice your muscles, you can practice your brain too.

Telling my friends about it helped a lot. Ignoring the problem doesn't help. You need to acknowledge and validate your own feelings, and it's great if you can get your friends to validate your feelings too. Feelings aren't wrong or right, they just are what they are.

Anyone who's battling with this issue, don't be afraid to see a psychologist or psychiatrist.

Also, ironically, if you care about the people on Fark (and outside of Fark) who say "Man up!" you are only reinforcing the negative thought patterns. So the best you can do is ignore them.
 
2013-02-14 09:31:03 PM  

Xcott: Kuroshin: And yet, here we are.  A nation where NASCAR and McDonald's are king, and rampant obesity due to over-indulgence is the norm.  Yup, it truly is a 'just' world.  These are obviously the cutting edge of Humanity.  'Murrica, fark yeah!

Wait, NASCAR?  What does NASCAR have to do with the world being just or unjust?  Does NASCAR involve torturing babies?


Every engine that is made, every tire changed, every gallon of gas burned signifies, in the final sense, a theft from those who hunger and are not fed, those who are cold and are not clothed. This world in derp is not spending money alone. It is spending the sweat of its laborers, the genius of its scientists, the hopes of its children.
 
2013-02-14 09:31:59 PM  
>  Telling my friends about it helped a lot. Ignoring the problem doesn't help. You need to acknowledge and validate your own feelings, and it's great if you can get your friends to validate your feelings too. Feelings aren't wrong or right, they just are what they are.

That's not what my friends tell me.

> Anyone who's battling with this issue, don't be afraid to see a psychologist or psychiatrist.

Assuming you can afford one.

> Also, ironically, if you care about the people on Fark (and outside of Fark) who say "Man up!" you are only reinforcing the negative thought patterns. So the best you can do is ignore them.

Why? If enough of them say it, it must be true.
 
2013-02-14 09:44:05 PM  

Smelly Pirate Hooker: CutBoard: Smelly Pirate Hooker: Sounds like Fark, only there's no counseling here, only bitterness.

It's not Fark, it's reality. Let it go........

No, it's Fark. The bitterness is super-concentrated, like Starbucks coffee and long-term marriage.


If you're going to compare Fark to coffee I'd go with kopi luwak.
 
2013-02-14 09:45:07 PM  

ialdabaoth: That's not what my friends tell me.


Well, what do your friends tell you?

> Anyone who's battling with this issue, don't be afraid to see a psychologist or psychiatrist.

Assuming you can afford one.


Now, that's a true issue right there. I think there's a shortage of psychiatrists too, so that makes it even more difficult to find one.
 
2013-02-14 09:50:22 PM  
Social Anxiety Disorder may be controversial, but it's not a conspiracy. Sorry, but people find out about real conspiracies. And it isn't about "guys who can't talk to girls". It's about people who can't talk to anyone.The kind of people who go years without making a single friend. Part of what makes a personality disorder a disorder is when it severely affects that person's mental or physical well-being. If you can reliably diagnose someone with that disorder based on a collective set of symptoms, and then can test those diagnosed for increased risk of mental harm, physical harm, or death, which you can do with social anxiety disorder, and find that people with the disorder are consistently at a higher risk for all three, then you can reliably call this a personality disorder. Really, I can understand indifference in this issue, but  aversion is more harmful to those inflicted than most people can guess. Sort of like the effects of homophobia on gays, causing an increased risk of mental harm, physical harm, or death.
 
2013-02-14 09:50:24 PM  

finnished: ialdabaoth: That's not what my friends tell me.

Well, what do your friends tell you?


That it's painful to talk to me for extended periods of time, and that I'm not really their problem, and that THEY at least have a life, and should be getting back to it.
 
2013-02-14 09:51:07 PM  

chatikh: Social Anxiety Disorder may be controversial, but it's not a conspiracy. Sorry, but people find out about real conspiracies. And it isn't about "guys who can't talk to girls". It's about people who can't talk to anyone.The kind of people who go years without making a single friend. Part of what makes a personality disorder a disorder is when it severely affects that person's mental or physical well-being. If you can reliably diagnose someone with that disorder based on a collective set of symptoms, and then can test those diagnosed for increased risk of mental harm, physical harm, or death, which you can do with social anxiety disorder, and find that people with the disorder are consistently at a higher risk for all three, then you can reliably call this a personality disorder. Really, I can understand indifference in this issue, but  aversion is more harmful to those inflicted than most people can guess. Sort of like the effects of homophobia on gays, causing an increased risk of mental harm, physical harm, or death.


But if they don't have any friends, then there isn't anyone to care about them, so why bother worrying about them?
 
2013-02-14 09:58:36 PM  
(Cue the "well, with all the shiat you spew on here all the time, no wonder no one wants to hang out with you!", which... trust me, I know.)
 
2013-02-14 10:03:59 PM  

ialdabaoth: finnished: ialdabaoth: That's not what my friends tell me.

Well, what do your friends tell you?

That it's painful to talk to me for extended periods of time, and that I'm not really their problem, and that THEY at least have a life, and should be getting back to it.


I've felt that way too. I've felt that I'm a burden, and then that makes me withdraw even more. And then I wonder why no-one wants to talk to me, and then I realize it's because I'm a burden, and the cycle is complete.

This is where the professional help comes in - they can help you break the cycle of feeling bad.

If you can't afford to pay a professional, there might be other ways of getting help. I wonder if there are any volunteer or charity organizations that organize help like this. I don't know.
 
2013-02-14 10:29:28 PM  
>  If you can't afford to pay a professional, there might be other ways of getting help. I wonder if there are any volunteer or charity organizations that organize help like this. I don't know.

If there are, they aren't in Arizona. Or at least, not if you're an unemployed 30-something man with no children and no criminal record.
 
2013-02-14 10:38:53 PM  

ialdabaoth: If there are, they aren't in Arizona. Or at least, not if you're an unemployed 30-something man with no children and no criminal record.


You could try one of these, if they are close to you:
http://www.mhaarizona.org/SupportGroups.html

Or
http://www.psychforums.com/
 
2013-02-14 10:39:55 PM  
I have social anxiety disorder. I'm the fourth generation. I take medication and it works but the pills will NOT do everything. You also take therapy to tackle the issues. I'm almost 100% better and I am loving life. But just because you take a pill doesn't men you will not have to push yourself and go into uncomfortable situations. You'll have to face the fear at some point.
 
2013-02-14 11:35:37 PM  

thismomentinblackhistory: Snarcoleptic_Hoosier: Just meeting the people you chat with online is a huge thing. I've made it a bit of a hobby to actually find the people who I screw around with. And, by default, that means I'll have to travel some pretty good distances.

I think you were going for:

[photos2.meetupstatic.com image 360x270]

But it kinda came off like:

[studentbanter.files.wordpress.com image 625x416]


Actually, it's the other way around.
 
2013-02-14 11:36:37 PM  

broadsword: CutBoard: mutterfark: There is a rather large difference between the kind of shyness you can fix with a little alcohol and a disabling terror of personal interaction.
One of the reasons I started Farking was a hope that anonymous interaction would lead to easier "real" interaction. It didn't work. I seem normal when I interact with people, but that's only due to years of practicing coping strategies. I tried the 'have a few drinks' method for years but found I still couldn't speak to women unless I was so drunk I was incoherent. The only way I can talk to women in public is convine myself of their unavailability. In fact, it's bad enough that I rarely post anything but lame attempts at humor even with the anonymity of Fark. Just typing this personal of a response is causing an anxiety reaction.
To sum up, in spite of being incomprehensible to most, shyness can be debilitating.


Wrong answer, if your able to type out your thoughts then your able to speak them. You did a real nice try at attempting to be "shy", but, your trying to convince the wrong people. The only one you need to deal with is yourself.

The internet is fairly anonymous in most places and thus is easier for someone to put forward a little bit of themselves they wouldn't do it in person.

Go back to your cave, troll



I'm sorry if you were thinking that I was trolling as that wasn't the intent at all. What you are talking about is one of the worst situations that we deal with today in that a lot of people are so worried about offending someone else that the only way they feel like they can talk to people is anonymously on the internet. Just as someone pointed out earlier, social interaction is a learned ability. I'm sorry that you haven't learned that yet.
 
2013-02-14 11:46:48 PM  

ialdabaoth: I'll ask again: if you're successful, and protected against retribution, why is compassion or empathy towards those who are not valuable?


I know very few people that I would consider invaluable to the human race. Being shy, doesn't fit that bill. I do feel compassion and empathise with the people that are shy or introverted. That doesn't mean in any way shape of form that they are invaluable as people. They just need to realize that they are valuable as people and that they might just have something of value to say. That's what the learning process is about in life, they sure don't need to look down upon themselves because they don't think that they don't have something that others can learn from them. I've never met a person that I couldn't learn something from. No matter good or bad.
 
2013-02-14 11:59:12 PM  

Snarcoleptic_Hoosier: Just meeting the people you chat with online is a huge thing. I've made it a bit of a hobby to actually find the people who I screw around with. And, by default, that means I'll have to travel some pretty good distances.


It's not really the same thing.

If I understand you correctly you might meet up with say "me" and you don't know me and you really don't care what I think about you but you can say you weren't shy because you chose to meet me.

No, true shyness is much deeper. It's more like I think that girl is cute but I'm scared to go talk to her because I'm sure she'll think I'm some kind of basement dweller. It's not really logical. I can be shy and she'll not notice me or I can go up and talk to her and she'll probably think I'm a basement dweller but she might actually like me - or maybe she'd just view me as a fellow human being.

It really doesn't make sense. A shy person may avoid other people because they might reject them, but by avoiding other people you've automatically been rejected.


To take things to the extreme I could go out to the bars every weekend and ask every woman I see "Wanna fark?" and probably 99% of them would tell me to go to hell, but that 1% might say "Okay!". Meanwhile, that shy person gets 0% of the pussy they didn't feel confident enough to ask for.
 
2013-02-15 12:09:12 AM  
Subby obviously has never had a social anxiety disorder. You sound like an asshole.
 
2013-02-15 12:52:45 AM  

chatikh: Social Anxiety Disorder may be controversial, but it's not a conspiracy. Sorry, but people find out about real conspiracies. And it isn't about "guys who can't talk to girls". It's about people who can't talk to anyone.The kind of people who go years without making a single friend. Part of what makes a personality disorder a disorder is when it severely affects that person's mental or physical well-being. If you can reliably diagnose someone with that disorder based on a collective set of symptoms, and then can test those diagnosed for increased risk of mental harm, physical harm, or death, which you can do with social anxiety disorder, and find that people with the disorder are consistently at a higher risk for all three, then you can reliably call this a personality disorder. Really, I can understand indifference in this issue, but  aversion is more harmful to those inflicted than most people can guess. Sort of like the effects of homophobia on gays, causing an increased risk of mental harm, physical harm, or death.


First time I've ever heard it described as controversial, as if it isn't a real thing. I graduated at the top of my high school class and had plenty of friends in high school, but I was never the social type and despite having a tight circle of five friends, only one was female. In college, I stopped talking to my friends from high school, but made a few friends in the same dorm but would often throw them away, preferring to sit alone in my room. After graduating college, I moved back home and stopped talking to my remaining friends from college, afraid that I would have nothing to talk about and embarrassed that I was so lonely. I had no friends for five years, despite there being plenty of interesting and outgoing people the same age as me at work. I didn't buy clothes or anything for myself, and wouldn't open my mail for months at a time, once going 18 months before I read any of it. I didn't talk to anyone that I didn't know, and would usually mumble anything I had to say. I'm improving now, after one of my friends from high school contacted me out of the blue, but I'm still unable to talk to women and to make friends. I'm not terrified of speaking to strangers, but I still find small talk useless since I am still in the pattern of thinking that I won't be making friends with anybody. I find that my body language is still often awkward and usually evokes 'get me the hell out of here', but I can read myself better and am slowly trying to adjust it. The source of everything since I was young was having an intense fear of rejection. I was verbally abused by my peers from 2nd to 7th grade, usually taunted because I had a lisp. I wasn't physically bullied because I was much smaller than everyone else; always looking at least two years younger. If I tried to speak, I'd be taunted down. Back then, even the nicest people would tell me to my face that I was creepy looking. I knew that I wasn't normal even back then. The earliest I thought of killing myself was in fifth grade. I had gone to the Museum of Natural History earlier in the year, and the chaperone was a classmate's father. On my birthday, I found out that he had died of a heart attack in his sleep, and I blamed myself for killing him. This is obviously turning into a journal entry, but I'm posting anyway to let people know that I am fully aware that all of these thoughts are not normal. They prevent you from having anything but loneliness in your life. I don't appreciate hearing that I'm simply a loser, and have been one since I was a child.
 
2013-02-15 01:25:41 AM  

GranoblasticMan: The Stealth Hippopotamus: Here's a little test: If you're at the bar with friends and you don't talk to the pretty girl because you're scared of rejection you dont need a pill. You're huddled in a corner and you've been crying for the last hour because you have to go to the store to buy food, you need a pill.

I want beer. I really want beer. I don't have much to do tonight and I enjoy the taste (as well as the general numbness to emotions that comes with the first half of being drunk). Problem is: I don't have any beer. I've been fighting with myself the past few hours just to convince myself to go out because of my social anxiety. Objectively, I know the reward (yummy tasty beer) is far greater than the risk (a few fleeting seconds of social interaction), but in my mind that risk seems insurmountably daunting.


UPDATE: (not that anyone cares) I finally bought beer.
 
2013-02-15 03:05:27 AM  

doczoidberg: The interesting part is that anti anxiety medications often cause sexual dysfunction.

SO, someone takes an anxiety med to get chicks, and then can't get off if he manages to get one in the sack.

Oh, irony. How I love you.


During orientation when I did my volunteer thing at the state mental hospital the educators said that patients masturbate because they don't know if their equipment works anymore due to the side effects of their meds.
 
2013-02-15 03:30:44 AM  

evilboyevil: chatikh: Social Anxiety Disorder may be controversial, but it's not a conspiracy. Sorry, but people find out about real conspiracies. And it isn't about "guys who can't talk to girls". It's about people who can't talk to anyone.The kind of people who go years without making a single friend. Part of what makes a personality disorder a disorder is when it severely affects that person's mental or physical well-being. If you can reliably diagnose someone with that disorder based on a collective set of symptoms, and then can test those diagnosed for increased risk of mental harm, physical harm, or death, which you can do with social anxiety disorder, and find that people with the disorder are consistently at a higher risk for all three, then you can reliably call this a personality disorder. Really, I can understand indifference in this issue, but  aversion is more harmful to those inflicted than most people can guess. Sort of like the effects of homophobia on gays, causing an increased risk of mental harm, physical harm, or death.

First time I've ever heard it described as controversial, as if it isn't a real thing. I graduated at the top of my high school class and had plenty of friends in high school, but I was never the social type and despite having a tight circle of five friends, only one was female. In college, I stopped talking to my friends from high school, but made a few friends in the same dorm but would often throw them away, preferring to sit alone in my room. After graduating college, I moved back home and stopped talking to my remaining friends from college, afraid that I would have nothing to talk about and embarrassed that I was so lonely. I had no friends for five years, despite there being plenty of interesting and outgoing people the same age as me at work. I didn't buy clothes or anything for myself, and wouldn't open my mail for months at a time, once going 18 months before I read any of it. I didn't talk to anyone that I didn't know, and would us ...


I can personally relate to some of what you said because I've been there.and experienced it. Not everything, but those that I can't personally relate to have other things which I've experienced in my own life.

When people in Washington talk about improving mental health care I sort of get my hopes up for a minute or two and then I realize they don't want to help people with mental problems like you or me, they just want to identify the ones which will go on shooting rampages which is definitely not me and I doubt you are one of those either.

take care of yourself
others won't do it
 
2013-02-15 07:38:33 AM  

Shyla: This headline affects every person between 15 and 29. They ALL have "social disorders" suddenly.


yup. and seem proud of it.
 
2013-02-15 09:25:24 AM  
Guys have trouble talking to chicks because they have trouble talking to people. Learn to start and maintain conversations with random strangers first, then it will be easy to have conversations with the random strangers in to whom you want to stick your dick.

Talking to people is a learned skill, some people never got or never gave themselves the opportunity to practice.

Then combine that with a healthy dose of stop giving a shiat what other people think then the shyest dude will be on his way to getting laid.

----------------------

Quick course for all you over 18 virgins:

Read this: http://www.heartless-biatches.com/rants/niceguys/spineless.shtml

Watch this: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KBgcjtE0xrE

Then read these: http://www.askmen.com/dating/doclove/archive1.html (I know its an ask men link but give it a try, other than his archaic obsession with home phone numbers the advice is great)
 
2013-02-15 03:00:10 PM  

Xcott: Kuroshin: And yet, here we are.  A nation where NASCAR and McDonald's are king, and rampant obesity due to over-indulgence is the norm.  Yup, it truly is a 'just' world.  These are obviously the cutting edge of Humanity.  'Murrica, fark yeah!

Wait, NASCAR?  What does NASCAR have to do with the world being just or unjust?  Does NASCAR involve torturing babies?


The second-lowest form of racing, only requiring slightly more driving skill than NHRA drag racing, providing zero advancements in mechanical engineering, and demanding the least possible attention from its fans is the number one motorsport in the US.  If you can't find the irony in people who believe in a just world, believing themselves to be premier among the world, while being the least intellectually and physically active, I can't help you.
 
2013-02-15 03:05:53 PM  

RembrandtQEinstein: Guys have trouble talking to chicks because they have trouble talking to people. Learn to start and maintain conversations with random strangers first, then it will be easy to have conversations with the random strangers in to whom you want to stick your dick.

Talking to people is a learned skill, some people never got or never gave themselves the opportunity to practice.

Then combine that with a healthy dose of stop giving a shiat what other people think then the shyest dude will be on his way to getting laid.



Not even close to being true.  Talking to random people does not trigger the same emotional or psychological response as talking to someone you find attractive.  Not.  Even.  Close.
 
2013-02-15 04:40:57 PM  
My 2 cents:

It became an "Illness" because to get insurance to pay for it you have to be labeled with a "disorder" or pay lots of money out of your pocket. For some people their "shyness" does inhibit their day to day life (won't talk to anyone to get a job, etc) and really do need help.

However, for "shyness" saying "Here's some pills have a nice day" isn't going to "cure" you. You'll need cognitive-behavioral therapy and social skills classes like this to help you learn the ropes.

Social Skills are just like regular skills, you need to use them or you lose them. Some people pick these up naturally and others need more help.

That being said, I do feel like we're trying to force people into a very narrow definition of what "normal" is, not everyone is an extrovert and as long as they can interface with the world enough to hold down a decent job and feel fairly comfortable in their life it isn't a problem.

/I kinda want to take this guy's class I feel that my social skills are slipping.
 
2013-02-15 05:06:14 PM  

Kuroshin: Xcott: Kuroshin: And yet, here we are.  A nation where NASCAR and McDonald's are king, and rampant obesity due to over-indulgence is the norm.  Yup, it truly is a 'just' world.  These are obviously the cutting edge of Humanity.  'Murrica, fark yeah!

Wait, NASCAR?  What does NASCAR have to do with the world being just or unjust?  Does NASCAR involve torturing babies?

The second-lowest form of racing, only requiring slightly more driving skill than NHRA drag racing, providing zero advancements in mechanical engineering, and demanding the least possible attention from its fans is the number one motorsport in the US.


Why does it matter whether a sport or competitive event provides advancements in engineering, or demands a great deal of attention from spectators?   Is the Olympic 100-meter dash some sort of low point for humanity, because they don't use hoverskates and you don't have to pay very close attention to keep track of it?

I think you're confusing the concepts of "unjust" and "too mundane for my snobby tastes."  There's nothing about a football game or a NASCAR race or meal at Applebee's that is inherently unjust, or an indictment of humanity---except to hypercritical people who have a huge hangup about anything too mainstream.
 
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