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(Rock 103)   Show that woman that's not your wife how much you care today. Feb. 13th is Mistress Day   (rock103.com) divider line 38
    More: Dumbass, Valentine's Day, private investigators  
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6945 clicks; posted to Main » on 13 Feb 2013 at 2:01 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-02-13 02:15:22 PM  
3 votes:

The One True TheDavid: This Feb. 16th will be the 30 anniversary of my ex-wife's desertion. At the time I was bummed out, but after a year I realized she did me a favor: the next one after her was 6 years younger, i.e. 18.

Eventually I learned good blowjobs ain't worth that much pain & suffering. Really, it's better to pay cash.


I'm not sure that counting the years and using words like "desertion" are signs that you've accepted what happened. Also see: remembering head from 30 years ago.
2013-02-13 02:05:18 PM  
3 votes:
No one who actually has a mistress will bother to comment here...they are too busy enjoying their mistress.
2013-02-13 07:03:47 PM  
2 votes:
This thread feels like a scene from "The Breakfast Club."
2013-02-13 04:18:03 PM  
2 votes:

Lipspinach: DROxINxTHExWIND: Lipspinach: I'm nailing my best friends' girlfriend.

She's getting nothing.

/he hates my guts now actually
//they still live together so I don't get to see her on Vday anyway

Thats a serious violation.

What...me screwing my friends girl?
A year ago I would've agreed and I told her it was a bad idea.
This guy was one of my best friends for 25 years
but I started losing respect for him a while ago for various reasons.
And then he started in with this weird control-freak shiat with her.
I stopped counting the black eyes he gave her after around #4.

But yet she won't leave him. Also she is way off the hot/crazy scale.
So you see, all involved in this, especially me, are ridiculously farked up.

tl/dr, it's complicated


LOL WHUT? If you're not man enough to step in and confront your "friend" for putting his hands on a woman then mind your farking business. Also, the fact that he's a woman beater doesn't excuse the snake shiat that you're doing. You gotta keep your hands off of your man's girl. Thats ManLaw.
2013-02-13 03:05:52 PM  
2 votes:

kimwim: IgG4: kimwim: My ex did that. Bought her the same heart shaped box of chocolates he got me. That's how I found out. She had to show me. They're married now. Ask me if they're happy.

Are they happy?

They are not happy. It's glorious. As my mother used to say, revenge is a dish best eaten cold.


I'm sure the idea of him being miserable gives you a little smile now and then, but you need to get over it. Maybe your only talking about it because of the subject of the thread, but I kinda doubt it.

The thing is, he's not going to be miserable forever. He's already proven that he will leave a woman (you), so he'll eventually leave her. As life goes on, his romantic prospects will grow, as most men's does, and he'll find someone nicer and younger, who is willing to forgive his past sins and live a fulfilling life with him. Maybe she'll be Asian and play a ton of tennis, you know, real fit and tons of stamina, but still super feminine, with her jet black hair in a pony tail bouncing playfully on her tan, fit upper back. He will feel terrible for what he did to you, ask your forgiveness and forgive himself. Then he will continue on with his young, energetic little Korean (maybe like 1/2 Korean, 1/2 Japanese, or OH! 1/2 black 1/2 Japanese, so she's got that gorgeous skin tone) spitfire, and all you will have is your bitterness.

My point being, living well and being happy is the only true way to get revenge. I hope that helps.
2013-02-13 02:59:08 PM  
2 votes:

WhippingBoy: Remember - It takes two to cheat:

One to cheat
One to nag incessantly driving your partner into the arms of another woman


Blaming the victim is what weak people do. Take some personal responsibility once in a while, y'know?
2013-02-13 02:41:54 PM  
2 votes:

kimwim: IgG4: kimwim: My ex did that. Bought her the same heart shaped box of chocolates he got me. That's how I found out. She had to show me. They're married now. Ask me if they're happy.

Are they happy?

They are not happy. It's glorious. As my mother used to say, revenge is a dish best eaten  served cold.


Subtle but important difference.
2013-02-13 02:24:06 PM  
2 votes:

DROxINxTHExWIND: Lucidz: I'm an out of work mid thirties recovering alcoholic. I can barely hold on to a wife, let alone get a mistress.

I think I found your problem.


In point of fact, I think most mistresses would take umbrage to the "out of work" part over the other two.  And I did say recovering.  Cut me some slack.
2013-02-13 02:16:58 PM  
2 votes:

IamAwake: The One True TheDavid: Eventually I learned good blowjobs ain't worth that much pain & suffering. Really, it's better to pay cash.

which hey, if your reason for getting married was to get blowjobs, then sure.


It is as good a reason as any other, since there are no good reasons.
2013-02-13 02:15:22 PM  
2 votes:

Diogenes: kimwim: She had to show me.

You knew her?

What's the etiquette here?  Do you have to buy your husband's mistress a gift, too?


Literally, she was the milkmaid. No, I didn't get her a gift. I was surprised, and relieved I didn't get a "gift" from her.
2013-02-13 02:08:16 PM  
2 votes:

Skyd1v: I barely have enough time keeping one woman's likes, dislikes, birthday, name, and food allergies straight.  I'm supposed to take on a second one as well?

I don't *think* so...


The second one is just to be a cash and carry operation.  You just have to be a sugar daddy, not that track all that shiat.
2013-02-13 02:07:00 PM  
2 votes:

kimwim: My ex did that. Bought her the same heart shaped box of chocolates he got me. That's how I found out. She had to show me. They're married now. Ask me if they're happy.


I feel sorry for people that get the typical box of chocolates.  They suck ass.   seriously horrible flavors inside.
2013-02-13 12:37:40 PM  
2 votes:
Don't I do enough for her already? What is she, my freaking wife???
2013-02-13 08:57:32 PM  
1 votes:

The One True TheDavid: FizixJunkee:

P.S. Always swallow. No ifs, ands, or buts about it.

I don't really care where the damn cum goes. I don't recall ever being blown by a guy who didn't swallow, but it seems like another guy thing I just don't get. Men are weird.

Most of my female partners didn't like the taste or the consistency and I can't say I blame them, so my usual practice was to keep a wad of tissue handy and catch it in that. But one of my hardest orgasms was when I spared the chick the yuckiness at the last split-second and directed it out into the room: I swear it spurted about 3 feet, copiously. This made me dizzy and I fell over. (No "substances" were involved.)

I was 15 when I gave my first blowjob -- I picked the victim and insisted he let me -- and it surprised me that he didn't believe it was my first: part of it was that it turned out to be fun, and part was that I "instinctively" gulped & swallowed. When it hits the front of the tongue you get the taste & consistency, when it blasts into the back of the throat it's gagging time, but there's a sweet spot right in the middle of the tongue where you can swallow easily without really tasting or registering it. But I only gave a handful of BJs to completion so I claim no expertise.

One thing I don't understand is "facials," eye-shots, bukake or especially pissing on the person afterward: it seems the intent is to degrade the cocksucker, while as far as I'm concerned getting my cock sucked is a favor to be grateful for, especially when I don't have to beg, buy dinner or pay.

Naturally it blew my mind when some guy picked me up in Oklahoma City and insisted on paying me to blow me, which struck me then as rather backward. It's not so hard to understand now that I'm "mature" but it's still kind of sad.

Anyway, like I said, blowing me is doing me a favor. I'm not averse to paying when I can afford it, but it is better with someone who does it for fun. However, and this is important, it displeases me when somebody expects ...


Ewww. Just Ewwww!
2013-02-13 08:44:44 PM  
1 votes:
FizixJunkee:

P.S. Always swallow. No ifs, ands, or buts about it.

I don't really care where the damn cum goes. I don't recall ever being blown by a guy who didn't swallow, but it seems like another guy thing I just don't get. Men are weird.

Most of my female partners didn't like the taste or the consistency and I can't say I blame them, so my usual practice was to keep a wad of tissue handy and catch it in that. But one of my hardest orgasms was when I spared the chick the yuckiness at the last split-second and directed it out into the room: I swear it spurted about 3 feet, copiously. This made me dizzy and I fell over. (No "substances" were involved.)

I was 15 when I gave my first blowjob -- I picked the victim and insisted he let me -- and it surprised me that he didn't believe it was my first: part of it was that it turned out to be fun, and part was that I "instinctively" gulped & swallowed. When it hits the front of the tongue you get the taste & consistency, when it blasts into the back of the throat it's gagging time, but there's a sweet spot right in the middle of the tongue where you can swallow easily without really tasting or registering it. But I only gave a handful of BJs to completion so I claim no expertise.

One thing I don't understand is "facials," eye-shots, bukake or especially pissing on the person afterward: it seems the intent is to degrade the cocksucker, while as far as I'm concerned getting my cock sucked is a favor to be grateful for, especially when I don't have to beg, buy dinner or pay.

Naturally it blew my mind when some guy picked me up in Oklahoma City and insisted on paying me to blow me, which struck me then as rather backward. It's not so hard to understand now that I'm "mature" but it's still kind of sad.

Anyway, like I said, blowing me is doing me a favor. I'm not averse to paying when I can afford it, but it is better with someone who does it for fun. However, and this is important, it displeases me when somebody expects or worse wants to be treated like a dirty filthy slut for doing it: I won't take that put up with that when I'm going down, and of course my standards are the most correct.
2013-02-13 08:04:04 PM  
1 votes:

KiwDaWabbit: I will never understand how someone can claim to love somebody and cheat.


Ditto.  I never considered cheating when I was married, even when my (now ex) wife was ignoring me and (as it turned out) cheating.
2013-02-13 08:00:26 PM  
1 votes:
I will never understand how someone can claim to love somebody and cheat.
2013-02-13 06:36:02 PM  
1 votes:

DROxINxTHExWIND: Lipspinach: DROxINxTHExWIND: Lipspinach: I'm nailing my best friends' girlfriend.

She's getting nothing.

/he hates my guts now actually
//they still live together so I don't get to see her on Vday anyway

Thats a serious violation.

What...me screwing my friends girl?
A year ago I would've agreed and I told her it was a bad idea.
This guy was one of my best friends for 25 years
but I started losing respect for him a while ago for various reasons.
And then he started in with this weird control-freak shiat with her.
I stopped counting the black eyes he gave her after around #4.
But yet she won't leave him. Also she is way off the hot/crazy scale.
So you see, all involved in this, especially me, are ridiculously farked up.

tl/dr, it's complicated

LOL WHUT? If you're not man enough to step in and confront your "friend" for putting his hands on a woman then mind your farking business. Also, the fact that he's a woman beater doesn't excuse the snake shiat that you're doing. You gotta keep your hands off of your man's girl. Thats ManLaw.


I'm going to have to side with Droix on this.  Man up or get lost.
2013-02-13 04:20:40 PM  
1 votes:

jst3p: This is how you spot a guy pretending to be a chick on the internet.


That, or an ugmo.

"Please pay attention to me, guys! PLEASE!!!!"
2013-02-13 04:17:32 PM  
1 votes:

FizixJunkee: Lucidz: I never met a normal girl who just absolutely loved giving head.  I know that's weird, but hear me out.  I'm relatively normal, I think... I like doing the face plant on a girl, personally.  But I've NEVER known of a girl who excitedly verbalized her enjoyment of it, or said "I'm REALLY good at it", or "I JUST LOVE doing it" that turned out to be normal.

I have NO scientific evidence to back this up or even explain it, its just personal experience.  Interestingly enough, having a wife who has friends with such nick-names as "triple digits" (This refers to how many dudes she's blown in a parking lot to get free drinks) I've found that the girls that "love it" or "do it for drinks" etc, either hold no value in the act, or feel some very bizarre sense of control over the man while doing it.  It seems not at all related to the actual fact that they are pleasuring the man.

YMMV


I'm a chick who really enjoys giving head.  In my opinion, it's a lot of fun.  It's one of those skills that you continue to improve upon.  Once you've mastered the standard blowjob (i.e., the one that's guaranteed to make your guy cum) you move on to perfecting all the variations:

a.  quantity and quality of saliva
b.  zero, one, or two hands (don't forget to give some thought to your particular hand lotion...most women wear hand lotion, and a fair amount of lotion can taste nasty, which can be distracting when you're going down on someone)
c.  rhythm and pace (e.g., slow and steady, or slow at the start and picking up pace as you go on)
d.  relative body angles (e.g., if you're on the bed, you can approach his cock from the side or in between his legs---maximal view of the action from his POV---or you can hover over him 69-style
e.  where in the mouth to work his dick (e.g., more or less cheek or throat action)
f.   where to stroke his dick with your tongue (each guy is different in this regard)
g.  how much pressure to apply with your lips and tongue
h.  how much you want to "tease ...


This is how you spot a guy pretending to be a chick on the internet.
2013-02-13 04:14:20 PM  
1 votes:

Lucidz: I never met a normal girl who just absolutely loved giving head.  I know that's weird, but hear me out.  I'm relatively normal, I think... I like doing the face plant on a girl, personally.  But I've NEVER known of a girl who excitedly verbalized her enjoyment of it, or said "I'm REALLY good at it", or "I JUST LOVE doing it" that turned out to be normal.

I have NO scientific evidence to back this up or even explain it, its just personal experience.  Interestingly enough, having a wife who has friends with such nick-names as "triple digits" (This refers to how many dudes she's blown in a parking lot to get free drinks) I've found that the girls that "love it" or "do it for drinks" etc, either hold no value in the act, or feel some very bizarre sense of control over the man while doing it.  It seems not at all related to the actual fact that they are pleasuring the man.

YMMV



I'm a chick who really enjoys giving head.  In my opinion, it's a lot of fun.  It's one of those skills that you continue to improve upon.  Once you've mastered the standard blowjob (i.e., the one that's guaranteed to make your guy cum) you move on to perfecting all the variations:

a.  quantity and quality of saliva
b.  zero, one, or two hands (don't forget to give some thought to your particular hand lotion...most women wear hand lotion, and a fair amount of lotion can taste nasty, which can be distracting when you're going down on someone)
c.  rhythm and pace (e.g., slow and steady, or slow at the start and picking up pace as you go on)
d.  relative body angles (e.g., if you're on the bed, you can approach his cock from the side or in between his legs---maximal view of the action from his POV---or you can hover over him 69-style
e.  where in the mouth to work his dick (e.g., more or less cheek or throat action)
f.   where to stroke his dick with your tongue (each guy is different in this regard)
g.  how much pressure to apply with your lips and tongue
h.  how much you want to "tease" his cock before you start sucking it in earnest
i.   kind and amount of ball-fondling

At this point, I feel like I have a couple dozen varieties of blowjob to offer.  Each one is different from the last.  Keeps it exciting.

P.S.  Always swallow.  No ifs, ands, or buts about it.
2013-02-13 03:36:03 PM  
1 votes:

Lipspinach: I'm nailing my best friends' girlfriend.

She's getting nothing.

/he hates my guts now actually
//they still live together so I don't get to see her on Vday anyway


Thats a serious violation.
2013-02-13 03:10:48 PM  
1 votes:

kimwim: It's sad what my kids had to go through.
I'm very happily remarried.


As far as you know.
2013-02-13 03:08:09 PM  
1 votes:

WhippingBoy: Quit nagging me!!!


Touché.

Girion47: Your profile says BIE.


What's your point?

Are you offering or just being observant?
2013-02-13 02:54:19 PM  
1 votes:
Remember - It takes two to cheat:

One to cheat
One to nag incessantly driving your partner into the arms of another woman
2013-02-13 02:53:41 PM  
1 votes:

Knucklepopper: kimwim: IgG4: kimwim:

My ex did that. Bought her the same heart shaped box of chocolates he got me. That's how I found out. She had to show me. They're married now. Ask me if they're happy.

Are they happy?

They are not happy. It's glorious. As my mother used to say, revenge is a dish best eaten cold.

It's sad though that you are still dwelling on it.


I think it's her best trait. That I've seen here anyway: it humanizes her a little, y'know.
2013-02-13 02:38:47 PM  
1 votes:

kimwim: IgG4: kimwim: My ex did that. Bought her the same heart shaped box of chocolates he got me. That's how I found out. She had to show me. They're married now. Ask me if they're happy.

Are they happy?

They are not happy. It's glorious. As my mother used to say, revenge is a dish best eaten cold.


It's sad though that you are still dwelling on it.
2013-02-13 02:32:02 PM  
1 votes:
The 14th is wife's day.   The rest of the year is mistress day, rotating between them.

/gets tedious
2013-02-13 02:23:22 PM  
1 votes:
"Well," said the computer programmer, "Ideally, you should have both a wife, *and* a mistress.  And they should know about each other.  That way, you can tell your wife you're with your mistress, and you can tell your mistress you're with your wife, and meanwhile, you can go in to the office and get some code written."

/I swear that's why half the geeks I know are poly
2013-02-13 02:18:55 PM  
1 votes:

DROxINxTHExWIND: Actually, that's the 15th, Subby. You spend the 14th avoiding and not returning calls because you're with the wife. After making the wife feel special enough that she'll let you out of the house without giving you the side eye, you go see the mistress with a gift and a bullshiat story about having to bail your brother out of jail the night before.


Naw.  Just make sure your girlfriend knows you're married and that you'll be spending the day with your wife.

/also helps if your girlfriend is married
//so I hear...
2013-02-13 02:17:48 PM  
1 votes:
If you're going to really man-up you have two wives.
2013-02-13 02:15:07 PM  
1 votes:

Smeggy Smurf: As soon as she moves to this city it's going to be like having two wives but without the doubled up sexy time


I suspect it will change the frequency, however.  Which direction - is up to you.
2013-02-13 02:14:06 PM  
1 votes:

Smeggy Smurf: Skyd1v: I barely have enough time keeping one woman's likes, dislikes, birthday, name, and food allergies straight.  I'm supposed to take on a second one as well?

I don't *think* so...

My sister-in-law is about to be widowed.  As soon as she moves to this city it's going to be like having two wives but without the doubled up sexy time.  I'm going to throw a pity party next year if I'm still alive


Solution to your problems.

http://news.yahoo.com/sister-open-marriage-takes-sharing-too-far-050 02 1131.html
2013-02-13 02:13:59 PM  
1 votes:

The One True TheDavid: Eventually I learned good blowjobs ain't worth that much pain & suffering. Really, it's better to pay cash.


which hey, if your reason for getting married was to get blowjobs, then sure.  Some of us consider women, and companionship in general, to be worth more than just life support systems for lips and vaginas.  Silly us.
2013-02-13 02:11:51 PM  
1 votes:
Actually, that's the 15th, Subby. You spend the 14th avoiding and not returning calls because you're with the wife. After making the wife feel special enough that she'll let you out of the house without giving you the side eye, you go see the mistress with a gift and a bullshiat story about having to bail your brother out of jail the night before.
2013-02-13 02:09:52 PM  
1 votes:
This Feb. 16th will be the 30 anniversary of my ex-wife's desertion. At the time I was bummed out, but after a year I realized she did me a favor: the next one after her was 6 years younger, i.e. 18.

Eventually I learned good blowjobs ain't worth that much pain & suffering. Really, it's better to pay cash.
2013-02-13 02:09:35 PM  
1 votes:
Note to myself: don't buy the same stuff for the wife and the mistress, ever.
2013-02-13 02:07:14 PM  
1 votes:
I barely have enough time keeping one woman's likes, dislikes, birthday, name, and food allergies straight.  I'm supposed to take on a second one as well?

I don't *think* so...
 
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