No one who actually has a mistress will bother to comment here...they are too busy enjoying their mistress.

IgG4: kimwim: My ex did that. Bought her the same heart shaped box of chocolates he got me. That's how I found out. She had to show me. They're married now. Ask me if they're happy.

Are they happy?

A quick pork before I go back to the ol' ball & chain!
Say - are those implants?

kimwim: My ex did that. Bought her the same heart shaped box of chocolates he got me. That's how I found out. She had to show me. They're married now. Ask me if they're happy.

I feel sorry for people that get the typical box of chocolates.  They suck ass.   seriously horrible flavors inside.

I barely have enough time keeping one woman's likes, dislikes, birthday, name, and food allergies straight.  I'm supposed to take on a second one as well?

I don't *think* so...

I've always wanted two women.  One to cook and one to clean.

/ba-dum-tish

Note to myself: don't buy the same stuff for the wife and the mistress, ever.

Do hookers count?

This Feb. 16th will be the 30 anniversary of my ex-wife's desertion. At the time I was bummed out, but after a year I realized she did me a favor: the next one after her was 6 years younger, i.e. 18.

Eventually I learned good blowjobs ain't worth that much pain & suffering. Really, it's better to pay cash.

Any one notice the ad for Elton john and his piano at the bottom of the article.

Skyd1v: I barely have enough time keeping one woman's likes, dislikes, birthday, name, and food allergies straight.  I'm supposed to take on a second one as well?

I don't *think* so...

My sister-in-law is about to be widowed.  As soon as she moves to this city it's going to be like having two wives but without the doubled up sexy time.  I'm going to throw a pity party next year if I'm still alive

The One True TheDavid: Eventually I learned good blowjobs ain't worth that much pain & suffering. Really, it's better to pay cash.

which hey, if your reason for getting married was to get blowjobs, then sure.  Some of us consider women, and companionship in general, to be worth more than just life support systems for lips and vaginas.  Silly us.

Smeggy Smurf: Skyd1v: I barely have enough time keeping one woman's likes, dislikes, birthday, name, and food allergies straight.  I'm supposed to take on a second one as well?

I don't *think* so...

My sister-in-law is about to be widowed.  As soon as she moves to this city it's going to be like having two wives but without the doubled up sexy time.  I'm going to throw a pity party next year if I'm still alive

Solution to your problems.

http://news.yahoo.com/sister-open-marriage-takes-sharing-too-far-050 02 1131.html

kimwim: My ex did that. Bought her the same heart shaped box of chocolates he got me. That's how I found out. She had to show me. They're married now. Ask me if they're happy.

I wonder what the thought process was for her... all giddy with glee "I can't wait to show kimwim what I got! Yaaaaay!"  Seriously, you're better off without those two Mensa members in your life.


/dude can't even cheat right

The One True TheDavid: Eventually I learned good blowjobs ain't worth that much pain & suffering.

I thought those were supposed to go together, plus the dog chain.

Smeggy Smurf: As soon as she moves to this city it's going to be like having two wives but without the doubled up sexy time

I suspect it will change the frequency, however.  Which direction - is up to you.

kimwim: My ex did that. Bought her the same heart shaped box of chocolates he got me. That's how I found out. She had to show me. They're married now. Ask me if they're happy.

I'm trying hard to figure this out.  How did you find out?  Did he have her name on the box he gave to you?  Maybe I need some food but I can't figure it out.

Get your mistress something from Jared. The Subway sandwich guy.

If you're going to really man-up you have two wives.

DROxINxTHExWIND: Actually, that's the 15th, Subby. You spend the 14th avoiding and not returning calls because you're with the wife. After making the wife feel special enough that she'll let you out of the house without giving you the side eye, you go see the mistress with a gift and a bullshiat story about having to bail your brother out of jail the night before.

Naw.  Just make sure your girlfriend knows you're married and that you'll be spending the day with your wife.

/also helps if your girlfriend is married
//so I hear...

I'm an out of work mid thirties recovering alcoholic.  I can barely hold on to a wife, let alone get a mistress.

new wave hairdos

kimwim: IgG4: kimwim: My ex did that. Bought her the same heart shaped box of chocolates he got me. That's how I found out. She had to show me. They're married now. Ask me if they're happy.

Are they happy?

They are not happy. It's glorious. As my mother used to say, revenge is a dish best eaten cold.

Love me some revenge cole slaw

"Well," said the computer programmer, "Ideally, you should have both a wife, *and* a mistress.  And they should know about each other.  That way, you can tell your wife you're with your mistress, and you can tell your mistress you're with your wife, and meanwhile, you can go in to the office and get some code written."

/I swear that's why half the geeks I know are poly

DROxINxTHExWIND: Lucidz: I'm an out of work mid thirties recovering alcoholic. I can barely hold on to a wife, let alone get a mistress.

I think I found your problem.

In point of fact, I think most mistresses would take umbrage to the "out of work" part over the other two.  And I did say recovering.  Cut me some slack.

kimwim: TNel: How did you find out? Did he have her name on the box he gave to you?

She thought if she showed me I'd immediately leave, move out, and give her the gift of him. It didn't quite work out that way. Not quite.

You don't sound at all clingy or unstable.  Or bitter.  I can't imagine why he cheated.

/...may they never meet.
//hot, Hot, HOT!

Good Behavior Day: I've always wanted two women.  One to cook and one to clean.

/ba-dum-tish

I hear digging but I don't hear chopping.

hartzdog: kimwim: TNel: How did you find out? Did he have her name on the box he gave to you?

She thought if she showed me I'd immediately leave, move out, and give her the gift of him. It didn't quite work out that way. Not quite.

You don't sound at all clingy or unstable.  Or bitter.  I can't imagine why he cheated.


0/10

IamAwake: The One True TheDavid:

Eventually I learned good blowjobs ain't worth that much pain & suffering. Really, it's better to pay cash.

which hey, if your reason for getting married was to get blowjobs, then sure.  Some of us consider women, and companionship in general, to be worth more than just life support systems for lips and vaginas.  Silly us.

Of course that wasn't my only reason: I was deeply in love. And 19-20. And wanted so much to be a "normal" person. Why I picked her for that is beyond me: I must have been mentally ill.

Everybody has to be good at something: for Becky Lynn it was making out in cars and giving enthusiastic head.

She had a few other skills but I valued those less. I'm glad she left before I stabbed her. You know how some crazy people bring out the psycho in others? Uh-huh.