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(ABC)   40 minutes of raunchy phone sex played in court. Greatest. Murder trial. EVER   (abcnews.go.com) divider line 110
    More: Amusing, phone sex  
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10441 clicks; posted to Main » on 13 Feb 2013 at 11:22 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-02-13 11:50:17 AM

spentmiles: When I was thirteen, my best friend started dating this older chick.  They started having sex regularly, which meant the only time he had for me was a few minutes during first lunch to tell me all the crazy things she would do.  He'd always ask me, "You ever had a chick do that?"  He knew I'd never even gotten my skinny dick out of my pants.  He just liked to rub it in that he was getting some and I wasn't.

I wanted to have a story to tell, so I decided to call one of the sex lines advertised in the back of the City Paper.  I stole my dad's credit card information, thinking that I could deny it and the bank would forgive the charges like they did when someone charged $3500 worth of auto parts to my mom's card.

I got the numbers off the card, waited until they were gone for the night, and then settled in with my loving bottle of lube and a warm washcloth.  I called up and got a hot sounding chick, who was a true professional - aggressive, loud, filthy dirty, and who kept putting me on hold every time it sounded like I was about to bust.  Unaware, the minutes were flying by.

Hearing her talk so dirty, I got a rush of temporary confidence.  I started saying all kinds of stuff: "You like it up the tits, honey?  You like it right up the tits?"  Whatever that meant.  "I want to come in your hair and rub it in like shampoo."  That's attentive.  "You ever come so hard you shiat your pants, sweetie?  I can make you thinner."  I was possessed and loving it.

Finally, after an hour or so, I'd rubbed my dick so raw with the wash cloth that I faked an orgasm just so I could hang up.  She begged me to call back later because, as she claimed, she'd never talked to anyone like me before.  I was a stallion.

Well, two weeks later, the credit card bill came.  That little call cost roughly $700.  And the bill line wasn't discrete: "1-900-HOT-SEXX Adult Entertainment."  My dad was livid, but didn't suspect me right off the bat.  He called the credit card company to dispute the charg ...


This very well may be the best post I've ever read on Fark.
 
2013-02-13 11:53:26 AM
This is what happens when sex education is delegated to the internets.
 
2013-02-13 11:54:56 AM

hp6sa: I haven't followed the case that closely - but didn't she stab him like 27 times, and shoot him twice?  It's just kinda hard to argue self-defense in that scenario.


Accident.
 
2013-02-13 11:55:38 AM

Giltric: Agent Smiths Laugh: Well if the guy is on tape having violent rape fantasies, maybe she did the world a favor.

Women also have rape fantasies.


When women have a higher occurrence of committing rape rather than fantasizing about being raped, I'll worry about that.

It's far too easy, and possibly far too common, for men with rape fantasies to take the next step.
 
2013-02-13 11:56:22 AM

Citrate1007: This very well may be the best post I've ever read on Fark.


He's no PocketNinja, but he has his moments.
 
2013-02-13 12:01:05 PM

Agent Smiths Laugh: Giltric: Agent Smiths Laugh: Well if the guy is on tape having violent rape fantasies, maybe she did the world a favor.

Women also have rape fantasies.

When women have a higher occurrence of committing rape rather than fantasizing about being raped, I'll worry about that.

It's far too easy, and possibly far too common, for men with rape fantasies to take the next step.


I'm not talking about woen who fantasize about raping someone...women fantasize about getting raped.

Some women get off on things being out of their control, being tied up, being used, taken and.....ummm BRB.
 
2013-02-13 12:01:26 PM

NightOwl2255: Citrate1007: This very well may be the best post I've ever read on Fark.

He's no PocketNinja, but he has his moments.


Gotta admit man, that was some next level shiat.
 
2013-02-13 12:01:45 PM

spentmiles: When I was thirteen, my best friend started dating this older chick.  They started having sex regularly, which meant the only time he had for me was a few minutes during first lunch to tell me all the crazy things she would do.  He'd always ask me, "You ever had a chick do that?"  He knew I'd never even gotten my skinny dick out of my pants.  He just liked to rub it in that he was getting some and I wasn't.

I wanted to have a story to tell, so I decided to call one of the sex lines advertised in the back of the City Paper.  I stole my dad's credit card information, thinking that I could deny it and the bank would forgive the charges like they did when someone charged $3500 worth of auto parts to my mom's card.

I got the numbers off the card, waited until they were gone for the night, and then settled in with my loving bottle of lube and a warm washcloth.  I called up and got a hot sounding chick, who was a true professional - aggressive, loud, filthy dirty, and who kept putting me on hold every time it sounded like I was about to bust.  Unaware, the minutes were flying by.

Hearing her talk so dirty, I got a rush of temporary confidence.  I started saying all kinds of stuff: "You like it up the tits, honey?  You like it right up the tits?"  Whatever that meant.  "I want to come in your hair and rub it in like shampoo."  That's attentive.  "You ever come so hard you shiat your pants, sweetie?  I can make you thinner."  I was possessed and loving it.

Finally, after an hour or so, I'd rubbed my dick so raw with the wash cloth that I faked an orgasm just so I could hang up.  She begged me to call back later because, as she claimed, she'd never talked to anyone like me before.  I was a stallion.

Well, two weeks later, the credit card bill came.  That little call cost roughly $700.  And the bill line wasn't discrete: "1-900-HOT-SEXX Adult Entertainment."  My dad was livid, but didn't suspect me right off the bat.  He called the credit card company to dispute the charg ...


Hence the bright green highlighting. My day is always a bit brighter after a spentmiles post!

/+AAA, would recommend on Angie's List
 
2013-02-13 12:10:20 PM

spentmiles: When I was thirteen, my best friend started dating this older chick.  They started having sex regularly, which meant the only time he had for me was a few minutes during first lunch to tell me all the crazy things she would do.  He'd always ask me, "You ever had a chick do that?"  He knew I'd never even gotten my skinny dick out of my pants.  He just liked to rub it in that he was getting some and I wasn't.

I wanted to have a story to tell, so I decided to call one of the sex lines advertised in the back of the City Paper.  I stole my dad's credit card information, thinking that I could deny it and the bank would forgive the charges like they did when someone charged $3500 worth of auto parts to my mom's card.

I got the numbers off the card, waited until they were gone for the night, and then settled in with my loving bottle of lube and a warm washcloth.  I called up and got a hot sounding chick, who was a true professional - aggressive, loud, filthy dirty, and who kept putting me on hold every time it sounded like I was about to bust.  Unaware, the minutes were flying by.

Hearing her talk so dirty, I got a rush of temporary confidence.  I started saying all kinds of stuff: "You like it up the tits, honey?  You like it right up the tits?"  Whatever that meant.  "I want to come in your hair and rub it in like shampoo."  That's attentive.  "You ever come so hard you shiat your pants, sweetie?  I can make you thinner."  I was possessed and loving it.

Finally, after an hour or so, I'd rubbed my dick so raw with the wash cloth that I faked an orgasm just so I could hang up.  She begged me to call back later because, as she claimed, she'd never talked to anyone like me before.  I was a stallion.

Well, two weeks later, the credit card bill came.  That little call cost roughly $700.  And the bill line wasn't discrete: "1-900-HOT-SEXX Adult Entertainment."  My dad was livid, but didn't suspect me right off the bat.  He called the credit card company to dispute the charg ...


I'm speechless.  Quite possibly the greatest post in history.
 
2013-02-13 12:10:21 PM

spentmiles: When I was thirteen, my best friend started dating this older chick.  They started having sex regularly, which meant the only time he had for me was a few minutes during first lunch to tell me all the crazy things she would do.  He'd always ask me, "You ever had a chick do that?"  He knew I'd never even gotten my skinny dick out of my pants.  He just liked to rub it in that he was getting some and I wasn't.

I wanted to have a story to tell, so I decided to call one of the sex lines advertised in the back of the City Paper.  I stole my dad's credit card information, thinking that I could deny it and the bank would forgive the charges like they did when someone charged $3500 worth of auto parts to my mom's card.

I got the numbers off the card, waited until they were gone for the night, and then settled in with my loving bottle of lube and a warm washcloth.  I called up and got a hot sounding chick, who was a true professional - aggressive, loud, filthy dirty, and who kept putting me on hold every time it sounded like I was about to bust.  Unaware, the minutes were flying by.

Hearing her talk so dirty, I got a rush of temporary confidence.  I started saying all kinds of stuff: "You like it up the tits, honey?  You like it right up the tits?"  Whatever that meant.  "I want to come in your hair and rub it in like shampoo."  That's attentive.  "You ever come so hard you shiat your pants, sweetie?  I can make you thinner."  I was possessed and loving it.

Finally, after an hour or so, I'd rubbed my dick so raw with the wash cloth that I faked an orgasm just so I could hang up.  She begged me to call back later because, as she claimed, she'd never talked to anyone like me before.  I was a stallion.

Well, two weeks later, the credit card bill came.  That little call cost roughly $700.  And the bill line wasn't discrete: "1-900-HOT-SEXX Adult Entertainment."  My dad was livid, but didn't suspect me right off the bat.  He called the credit card company to dispute the charg ...


dude, if you didn't have TF already, I would've sponsored your ass so hard, your eyes would see detroit
 
2013-02-13 12:18:12 PM

somedude210: "I'm going to tie you to a tree and put it in your ass,"

wait...put the tree in her ass? Cause how can you do that if you're tied to it? THESE ARE IMPORTANT QUESTIONS, PEOPLE!!!!


That little birch had it coming
 
2013-02-13 12:19:17 PM
This very well may be the best post I've ever read on Fark.

He's no PocketNinja, but he has his moments.


Please. he's ten times more entertaining (spentmiles, that is)
 
2013-02-13 12:22:02 PM

spentmiles: When I was thirteen, my best friend started dating this older chick.....


spentmiles, I love you so much.
 
2013-02-13 12:22:40 PM

NightOwl2255: In case TTIWWOP, NSFW pics of Miss Arias.


Wow... and I thought I've seen pink scrambled eggs before. I was wrong.
 
2013-02-13 12:24:23 PM

spentmiles: When I was thirteen, my best friend started dating this older chick.   ...


Best thing I ever read on Fark!  awesome!
 
2013-02-13 12:24:35 PM
He would still be alive if he had kept her properly tied up.
So its his own fault.
 
2013-02-13 12:27:05 PM
I was bumping around downtown a couple of weeks ago and I'm 99% sure I saw her defense attorney shlumping to the courthouse.
 
2013-02-13 12:28:09 PM

Somacandra: FTFA: her voice on the recording could be heard moaning and her mother and sister listened from the front row of the court room gallery....Eventually, Arias orgasms, and Alexander tells her, "You sound like a 12 year old having an orgasm, that's so hot, like little girl."....."You're bad, you make me feel so dirty," Arias responded.

Wow. There's awkward, and then there's A-W-K-W-A-R-D.


Yeah, that is just gross.
 
2013-02-13 12:32:09 PM

spentmiles: When I was thirteen, my best friend started dating this older chick.  They started having sex regularly, which meant the only time he had for me was a few minutes during first lunch to tell me all the crazy things she would do.  He'd always ask me, "You ever had a chick do that?"  He knew I'd never even gotten my skinny dick out of my pants.  He just liked to rub it in that he was getting some and I wasn't.

I wanted to have a story to tell, so I decided to call one of the sex lines advertised in the back of the City Paper.  I stole my dad's credit card information, thinking that I could deny it and the bank would forgive the charges like they did when someone charged $3500 worth of auto parts to my mom's card.

I got the numbers off the card, waited until they were gone for the night, and then settled in with my loving bottle of lube and a warm washcloth.  I called up and got a hot sounding chick, who was a true professional - aggressive, loud, filthy dirty, and who kept putting me on hold every time it sounded like I was about to bust.  Unaware, the minutes were flying by.

Hearing her talk so dirty, I got a rush of temporary confidence.  I started saying all kinds of stuff: "You like it up the tits, honey?  You like it right up the tits?"  Whatever that meant.  "I want to come in your hair and rub it in like shampoo."  That's attentive.  "You ever come so hard you shiat your pants, sweetie?  I can make you thinner."  I was possessed and loving it.

Finally, after an hour or so, I'd rubbed my dick so raw with the wash cloth that I faked an orgasm just so I could hang up.  She begged me to call back later because, as she claimed, she'd never talked to anyone like me before.  I was a stallion.

Well, two weeks later, the credit card bill came.  That little call cost roughly $700.  And the bill line wasn't discrete: "1-900-HOT-SEXX Adult Entertainment."  My dad was livid, but didn't suspect me right off the bat.  He called the credit card company to dispute the charg ...


did not see that coming....
 
2013-02-13 12:37:53 PM
Stop feeding the troll.
 
2013-02-13 12:40:54 PM

rickythepenguin: I was bumping around downtown a couple of weeks ago and I'm 99% sure I saw her defense attorney shlumping to the courthouse.


CSB!
 
2013-02-13 12:44:46 PM
i know the rule is to never put your dick in crazy, but i think i have accidently broken that rule - i hope i don't end up murdered to death too.

this chick on trial is much further down the crazy road though.
 
2013-02-13 12:44:55 PM
img27.imageshack.us
 
2013-02-13 12:46:15 PM
"I'm going to tie you to a tree and put it in your ass,"

Don't care how much they tease for the reboot. If it doesn't have Bruce Campbell, I'm not watching it.
 
2013-02-13 12:52:21 PM
Anyone who's been following this trial at all can see this woman is completely nutters...  I came in to comment on the last line in the article...

The long, meandering conversations ends with the pair singing a variety of songs, including the National Anthem, together until Alexander falls asleep.

Is this something the kids are doing now?  Signing off from their raunchy phone sex with the Star Spangled Banner?  Was I born in the wrong decade, or what?  Did Manti Teo do this too?

Having said all this, that phone sex story above was worth the price of admission...
 
2013-02-13 12:54:21 PM

somedude210: "I'm going to tie you to a tree and put it in your ass,"

wait...put the tree in her ass? Cause how can you do that if you're tied to it? THESE ARE IMPORTANT QUESTIONS, PEOPLE!!!!


Well if it was a sapling, he could just bend it until it reached her ass.
 
2013-02-13 12:56:00 PM

Agent Smiths Laugh: Well if the guy is on tape having violent rape fantasies, maybe she did the world a favor.


Yes, it is very important to kill or at least arrest people for their thoughts and fantasies.
 
2013-02-13 12:56:12 PM
 
2013-02-13 12:57:42 PM

spentmiles: When I was thirteen,



Is it bad that I'm laughing really hard because the manager got shot in the face?Yes.
 
2013-02-13 01:05:05 PM

NightOwl2255: In case TTIWWOP, NSFW pics of Miss Arias.


In an attempt to insult the woman's labia, one of the commenters in the linked thread posted a picture of a roast beef sandwich. However, the sandwich looks supremely delicious.
 
2013-02-13 01:16:27 PM

spentmiles: When I was thirteen,..


You sound like fun... call me sometime!
 
2013-02-13 01:21:32 PM

spentmiles: When I was thirteen,


That was the most epic CSB I've read on Fark in years!!!
 
2013-02-13 01:22:35 PM

spentmiles: When I was thirteen, my best friend started dating this older chick.  They started having sex regularly, which meant the only time he had for me was a few minutes during first lunch to tell me all the crazy things she would do.  He'd always ask me, "You ever had a chick do that?"  He knew I'd never even gotten my skinny dick out of my pants.  He just liked to rub it in that he was getting some and I wasn't.

I wanted to have a story to tell, so I decided to call one of the sex lines advertised in the back of the City Paper.  I stole my dad's credit card information, thinking that I could deny it and the bank would forgive the charges like they did when someone charged $3500 worth of auto parts to my mom's card.

I got the numbers off the card, waited until they were gone for the night, and then settled in with my loving bottle of lube and a warm washcloth.  I called up and got a hot sounding chick, who was a true professional - aggressive, loud, filthy dirty, and who kept putting me on hold every time it sounded like I was about to bust.  Unaware, the minutes were flying by.

Hearing her talk so dirty, I got a rush of temporary confidence.  I started saying all kinds of stuff: "You like it up the tits, honey?  You like it right up the tits?"  Whatever that meant.  "I want to come in your hair and rub it in like shampoo."  That's attentive.  "You ever come so hard you shiat your pants, sweetie?  I can make you thinner."  I was possessed and loving it.

Finally, after an hour or so, I'd rubbed my dick so raw with the wash cloth that I faked an orgasm just so I could hang up.  She begged me to call back later because, as she claimed, she'd never talked to anyone like me before.  I was a stallion.

Well, two weeks later, the credit card bill came.  That little call cost roughly $700.  And the bill line wasn't discrete: "1-900-HOT-SEXX Adult Entertainment."  My dad was livid, but didn't suspect me right off the bat.  He called the credit card company to dispute the charg ...


Great Story Bro
 
2013-02-13 01:28:13 PM

Citrate1007: spentmiles: When I was thirteen, my best friend started dating this older chick.


This very well may be the best post I've ever read on Fark.

Is there a Fark C/S/B Award?
 
2013-02-13 01:30:05 PM
"Oh my gosh, that is so debasing, I like it," Arias responded

if she likes being debased then hearing this tape played in public must be orgasmic
 
2013-02-13 01:33:05 PM

KarmicDisaster: hp6sa: I haven't followed the case that closely - but didn't she stab him like 27 times, and shoot him twice?  It's just kinda hard to argue self-defense in that scenario.

Accident.


The Aristocrats!
 
2013-02-13 01:48:25 PM

spentmiles: I had to get a job at McDonald's, which really sucked because one night we got robbed and I watched my manager lady get shot in the face, point blank, brains all over the coffee pot and shake machine.


i.imgur.com
 
2013-02-13 01:49:54 PM
spentmiles:

Favorited.
 
2013-02-13 01:55:33 PM
It's amazing how many people in this thread have never heard of spentmiles.

Do yourselves a favor and favorite this genius in a bright color.  Also, never take anything he says as truth; enjoy it for the beautiful fiction that it is.
 
2013-02-13 02:08:37 PM

Giltric: I'm not talking about woen who fantasize about raping someone...women fantasize about getting raped.

Some women get off on things being out of their control, being tied up, being used, taken and.....ummm BRB.


There are cultural factors influencing that. Until not terribly long ago (10-odd years, maybe?), in romance novels, the first sex between the lead characters was always a rape.

That way, the female protagonist got to have sex, without having done anything so horrible as wanting to have sex.

Usually things got consensual after that. I think.
 
2013-02-13 02:13:39 PM
More like testimoaning amirite?!?
 
2013-02-13 02:20:36 PM

spentmiles: When I was thirteen, my best friend started dating this older chick.  They started having sex regularly, which meant the only time he had for me was a few minutes during first lunch to tell me all the crazy things she would do.  He'd always ask me, "You ever had a chick do that?"  He knew I'd never even gotten my skinny dick out of my pants.  He just liked to rub it in that he was getting some and I wasn't.

I wanted to have a story to tell, so I decided to call one of the sex lines advertised in the back of the City Paper.  I stole my dad's credit card information, thinking that I could deny it and the bank would forgive the charges like they did when someone charged $3500 worth of auto parts to my mom's card.

I got the numbers off the card, waited until they were gone for the night, and then settled in with my loving bottle of lube and a warm washcloth.  I called up and got a hot sounding chick, who was a true professional - aggressive, loud, filthy dirty, and who kept putting me on hold every time it sounded like I was about to bust.  Unaware, the minutes were flying by.

Hearing her talk so dirty, I got a rush of temporary confidence.  I started saying all kinds of stuff: "You like it up the tits, honey?  You like it right up the tits?"  Whatever that meant.  "I want to come in your hair and rub it in like shampoo."  That's attentive.  "You ever come so hard you shiat your pants, sweetie?  I can make you thinner."  I was possessed and loving it.

Finally, after an hour or so, I'd rubbed my dick so raw with the wash cloth that I faked an orgasm just so I could hang up.  She begged me to call back later because, as she claimed, she'd never talked to anyone like me before.  I was a stallion.

Well, two weeks later, the credit card bill came.  That little call cost roughly $700.  And the bill line wasn't discrete: "1-900-HOT-SEXX Adult Entertainment."  My dad was livid, but didn't suspect me right off the bat.  He called the credit card company to dispute the charge.  The bank investigated, contacted the phone sex operator, who then miraculously produced, for all parties involved, the recording of the conversation.  I was in my bedroom, listening through the air vent, while my dad played it for my mom in the basement.  It was all my slick lines, consummated with my bellowing, dramatic orgasm.

My parents were laughing so hard that my mom threw up.  I still to this day have never lived it down - every birthday card I get has a twenty dollar bill in it with a little note encouraging me to enjoy some phone sex, "on them."  I had to get a job at McDonald's, which really sucked because one night we got robbed and I watched my manager lady get shot in the face, point blank, brains all over the coffee pot and shake machine.  Trauma breeds trauma I guess.

So yeah, stay away from phone sex lines, and encourage your children to do the same.


I really need to start looking at usernames before reading posts, but then it wouldn't be as fun.
 
2013-02-13 02:22:09 PM
She killed him because this is a classic case of "the girl you fark but won't take home to mother." She said the only time he paid attention to her was when they were alone. He didn't show any affection to her in front of other people.

She was just his skank on the side but she deluded herself that he loved her and she would do anything to please him, including converting to Mormonism so he would eventually marry her.

When she finally realized her true place in his life, she killed him.

She admitted she did it and the self-defense claim is bullcrap. He was in the shower. The only "self-defense" part was her defending her herself emotionally, not physically.

/a woman, BTW, and have no sympathy for her
 
2013-02-13 02:23:36 PM

spentmiles: When I was thirteen...


Whenever spentmiles shows up to a thread, we've reached the apex of posting...there's nowhere left to go but down.  Once again, you've outdone yourself and made our posts pedestrian in comparison.
 
2013-02-13 02:36:09 PM
cdn.stripersonline.com
 
2013-02-13 02:51:58 PM

mudpants: [cdn.stripersonline.com image 320x240]


Came for this... leaving extra satisfied thanks to spentmiles.
 
2013-02-13 03:19:53 PM
Gosh, what a dirty, filthy hooooorrrrrrrr

She sort of reminds me of an ex.
 
2013-02-13 03:42:48 PM

spentmiles: When I was thirteen, my best friend started dating this older chick.  They started having sex regularly, which meant the only time he had for me was a few minutes during first lunch to tell me all the crazy things she would do.  He'd always ask me, "You ever had a chick do that?"  He knew I'd never even gotten my skinny dick out of my pants.  He just liked to rub it in that he was getting some and I wasn't.

I wanted to have a story to tell, so I decided to call one of the sex lines advertised in the back of the City Paper.  I stole my dad's credit card information, thinking that I could deny it and the bank would forgive the charges like they did when someone charged $3500 worth of auto parts to my mom's card.

I got the numbers off the card, waited until they were gone for the night, and then settled in with my loving bottle of lube and a warm washcloth.  I called up and got a hot sounding chick, who was a true professional - aggressive, loud, filthy dirty, and who kept putting me on hold every time it sounded like I was about to bust.  Unaware, the minutes were flying by.

Hearing her talk so dirty, I got a rush of temporary confidence.  I started saying all kinds of stuff: "You like it up the tits, honey?  You like it right up the tits?"  Whatever that meant.  "I want to come in your hair and rub it in like shampoo."  That's attentive.  "You ever come so hard you shiat your pants, sweetie?  I can make you thinner."  I was possessed and loving it.

Finally, after an hour or so, I'd rubbed my dick so raw with the wash cloth that I faked an orgasm just so I could hang up.  She begged me to call back later because, as she claimed, she'd never talked to anyone like me before.  I was a stallion.

Well, two weeks later, the credit card bill came.  That little call cost roughly $700.  And the bill line wasn't discrete: "1-900-HOT-SEXX Adult Entertainment."  My dad was livid, but didn't suspect me right off the bat.  He called the credit card company to dispute the charg ...


I seriously love you.

So goddamn funny all the time, every time.
 
2013-02-13 04:07:04 PM

spentmiles: When I was thirteen, my best friend started dating this older chick.  They started having sex regularly, which meant the only time he had for me was a few minutes during first lunch to tell me all the crazy things she would do.  He'd always ask me, "You ever had a chick do that?"  He knew I'd never even gotten my skinny dick out of my pants.  He just liked to rub it in that he was getting some and I wasn't.

I wanted to have a story to tell, so I decided to call one of the sex lines advertised in the back of the City Paper.  I stole my dad's credit card information, thinking that I could deny it and the bank would forgive the charges like they did when someone charged $3500 worth of auto parts to my mom's card.

I got the numbers off the card, waited until they were gone for the night, and then settled in with my loving bottle of lube and a warm washcloth.  I called up and got a hot sounding chick, who was a true professional - aggressive, loud, filthy dirty, and who kept putting me on hold every time it sounded like I was about to bust.  Unaware, the minutes were flying by.

Hearing her talk so dirty, I got a rush of temporary confidence.  I started saying all kinds of stuff: "You like it up the tits, honey?  You like it right up the tits?"  Whatever that meant.  "I want to come in your hair and rub it in like shampoo."  That's attentive.  "You ever come so hard you shiat your pants, sweetie?  I can make you thinner."  I was possessed and loving it.

Finally, after an hour or so, I'd rubbed my dick so raw with the wash cloth that I faked an orgasm just so I could hang up.  She begged me to call back later because, as she claimed, she'd never talked to anyone like me before.  I was a stallion.

Well, two weeks later, the credit card bill came.  That little call cost roughly $700.  And the bill line wasn't discrete: "1-900-HOT-SEXX Adult Entertainment."  My dad was livid, but didn't suspect me right off the bat.  He called the credit card company to dispute the charg ...


I used to say that you were a poor man's Pocket Ninja, but you are really coming into your own.  Well done sir.  Well done.
 
2013-02-13 04:27:07 PM
Quick questions - who recorded this? And why?
 
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