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(Mediabistro)   "Storage Wars" cast member takes himself out of the bidding   (mediabistro.com) divider line 22
    More: Sad, carbon monoxide poisons, TMZ, cast member, Mark Balelo  
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11996 clicks; posted to Entertainment » on 12 Feb 2013 at 10:14 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



Voting Results (Smartest)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


Archived thread
2013-02-12 03:35:12 PM
2 votes:

Phoenix_M: meanmutton: I am Wee Todd Ed: I still don't get how the Storage Wars guys make money.

Typical episode:
Dave Hester: "I paid $800 for this locker and boy did I score!  These old faded dirty jeans that I found in a trash bag I'll sell for $50 bucks a piece in my store.  This folding card table with one bent leg easy $350!  And best of all this soiled queen sized mattress with blood stains is easily going to get me $500!  Total profit eleventy billion dollars!!!"

Hester was always the worst at that.  On occasion, he actually got some good, new items that sold for real money but most of the time, he was assigning his own obscene value to absolute junk.

The others tended to be a little more reasonable, though.

Hester bought a locker that had been the inventory of a used book store he was saying he had 10k in books for a locker he paid $500 for; yeah maybe if you opened a bookstore and sold it over a period of years.


Exactly. Not to mention the overhead of transporting, sorting, pricing, storing and displaying the books. If it was that easy to sell the books that's what the previous owner would have done instead of sticking them in a storage locker.
2013-02-12 11:03:27 AM
2 votes:
cdn.cnwimg.com
2013-02-12 10:36:08 AM
2 votes:
I've watched probably 30 episodes of this show and I've never seen this guy.
2013-02-12 10:34:26 AM
2 votes:
Pleasedon'tletitbeBarrypleasedon'tletitbeBarrypleasedon'tletitbeBarry p leasedon'tletitbeBarrypleasedon'tletitbeBarry...

*click*

Who? And why couldn't it have been Hester?
2013-02-12 10:21:14 AM
2 votes:
As long as nothing happened to Brandi's sweater kittens, I think we'll be okay.
2013-02-13 01:04:07 AM
1 votes:

Tyrosine: Prank Call of Cthulhu: Maybe Brandi could sell motorboats.

Which would be great if this sub-human troglodyte hadn't been balls deep in her:

[img.poptower.com image 431x600]

Do you really want to fark someone with standards THAT low??!?


I can't jam my schlong into her her standards, so who cares what shape they're in?
2013-02-12 02:05:59 PM
1 votes:

Prank Call of Cthulhu: There's always Shipping Wars. It's not without its charms.


If nothing else, Shipping Wars has convinced me to give independent shippers an  extremely wide berth on the freeway.
2013-02-12 01:14:36 PM
1 votes:

Prank Call of Cthulhu: Maybe Brandi could sell motorboats.


Which would be great if this sub-human troglodyte hadn't been balls deep in her:

img.poptower.com

Do you really want to fark someone with standards THAT low??!?
2013-02-12 12:56:36 PM
1 votes:
Am I the only one who thinks this chick is stoned 24/7?

www.storagewars-texas.com
2013-02-12 12:31:17 PM
1 votes:

Prank Call of Cthulhu: Maybe Brandi could sell motorboats.


The primary indictment of Brandi is that she's "married" to Jarrod.
2013-02-12 12:09:36 PM
1 votes:

lc6529: IE:  Yeah those jeans with the skidmarks on the inside are worth a hundred dollar bill all day long.


"And they're in a black plastic garbage bag! That bag is a five dollar bill all day!"

Dave would make more money by selling customers the opportunity to punch him in the face. Maybe Brandi could sell motorboats. Barry--shiat, I'd pay good money just to hang out with him all day. I can't even begin to imagine all the random awesomeness that must befall him in the course of an average day.
2013-02-12 12:07:50 PM
1 votes:
Krowdaddy Chixdiggit:

This broad was most likely VERY doable a couple of decades ago.....

/And yes, still very much doable......FOLKS!



I also think, whatever her name is, storage hostess type lady...
Is most likely a hellcat in the sack. Was/is still ok looking to a point...but I get the feeling she'd do just about anything in bed and be pretty farking happy about it.
2013-02-12 11:57:03 AM
1 votes:

The Great EZE: Brand-who? The new hotness is Candy from Storage Wars New York.




A challenger appears....

www.aetv.com
2013-02-12 11:54:12 AM
1 votes:

Ctrl-Alt-Del: I am Wee Todd Ed: I still don't get how the Storage Wars guys make money.

Hester owns his own auction house
Jarrod and the twins sell the crap in a thrift store.
Darrell sells the crap at swap meets

You have to remember most of the TV hype about values, profit, loss, etc are completely made up dramatic crap for the show. Much of that stuff they pass over as "worthless" for the cameras goes right out onto the shelves in their store/flea market table. Fifty miscellaneous doodads that sell for twenty bucks each will more than make up for the cost of most of the lockers they buy. Also, they buy stuff from other, more traditional sources as well, so it's not like the profit from the lockers is the only money they make


And, of course, I'm sure they earn a hefty salary to appear on (inexplicably) one of the most popular series in A&E history.
2013-02-12 11:44:16 AM
1 votes:

EyeballKid: And Hester would run the bid up just to screw with, let's say, either Brandi's husband or Wow Factor guy who looks like a replicant.


Hester's been fired. The profile from the show spurred him to move from consignment store to auction house and slap a trademark on 'yup', but the auction house tanked, he started losing money, he found he couldn't scale back down to consignment store, he went from unstoppable force to annoying gadfly to troll who barely wins anything anymore, and then he decided to take the show down with him in a hissy fit by suing it for being fake, and then the show fired his sorry ass.
2013-02-12 11:37:16 AM
1 votes:
I still don't get how the Storage Wars guys make money.

Typical episode:
Dave Hester: "I paid $800 for this locker and boy did I score!  These old faded dirty jeans that I found in a trash bag I'll sell for $50 bucks a piece in my store.  This folding card table with one bent leg easy $350!  And best of all this soiled queen sized mattress with blood stains is easily going to get me $500!  Total profit eleventy billion dollars!!!"

or

"So I found this old painting with Van Goghs name on it in a box marked, "Grandma's home decor" under a soiled mattress and next to a christmas tree.  I'm not real familiar with art but luckily I know an art buddy who is totally available to give me a free estimate of its worth!"

Art Guy: "Oh yeah, you hit the jackpot!  See this a painting by Van Gogh and even though it says reproduction at the bottom on the back with a Kmart barcode just adds to the value!  I've seen somthing like this go for a billion dollars at an art auction recently.  So you should get atleast a half a billion!"
2013-02-12 11:23:49 AM
1 votes:

Persnickety: To kill yourself via carbon monoxide posioning, you need to put yourself in a small enclosed place.  I wonder where he found a place like that.


It's a shame he didn't do it that way. Get a storage locker under a phony name, off himself in it without telling anyone, and then in a couple of months after the rent has been defaulted on: Best...episode...of...storage...wars...EVER!

"OK folks, we've got a 9 x 12 here, have a look inside, don't touch anything and---OH MY GOD!!!"
2013-02-12 11:20:47 AM
1 votes:

Flappyhead: No, not the man purse!!


THAT'S MY PURSE!  I DON'T KNOW YOU!
2013-02-12 10:57:15 AM
1 votes:
To kill yourself via carbon monoxide posioning, you need to put yourself in a small enclosed place.  I wonder where he found a place like that.
2013-02-12 10:50:22 AM
1 votes:
img.poptower.com

"That's it, folks, and don't forget to pay the ferryman!"
M-G
2013-02-12 10:45:47 AM
1 votes:

browser_snake: I've watched probably 30 episodes of this show and I've never seen this guy.


This.
2013-02-12 10:29:39 AM
1 votes:
Storage Wars regular Mark Balelo committed suicide on Monday by way of carbon monoxide poisoning, reportedly after learning that he was a regular on the reality television show, Storage Wars.
 
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