If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(The Sun)   Survey finds some men spend four times longer on grooming than they do having sex -- and by 'some men' they mean 'self-absorbed wankers'   (thesun.co.uk) divider line 57
    More: Fail  
•       •       •

2319 clicks; posted to Main » on 12 Feb 2013 at 4:33 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



57 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

Archived thread

First | « | 1 | 2 | » | Last | Show all
 
2013-02-11 10:12:23 PM
Hardly new
2.bp.blogspot.com
 
2013-02-11 10:47:25 PM
Well, duh, who doesn't spend 2 minutes shaving each morning?

/I've said too much.
 
2013-02-12 12:09:39 AM
Don't most animals spend more time preparing to get f*cked than actually f*cking?

I feel most enlightened by this shocking revelation.
 
2013-02-12 12:14:14 AM
Grooming takes a lot of time and patience.  First, you have to gain the child's trust...

/over there, that seat, please
 
2013-02-12 01:18:00 AM
By "some men" they mean farkers.

0 minutes grooming == (0 x 4) minutes having sex.
 
2013-02-12 04:34:51 AM
That's not fair. I'm a wanker and I spend NO time grooming!
 
2013-02-12 04:39:30 AM
You gotta wash the stank off.
 
2013-02-12 04:41:10 AM

ModernLuddite: You gotta wash the stank off.


Nah. Just pass out and start all over again.
 
2013-02-12 04:46:17 AM
WOW!

I'm getting a lot of sex that I was unaware of.
 
2013-02-12 04:47:07 AM

serial_crusher: By "some men" they mean farkers.

0 minutes grooming == (0 x 4) minutes having sex.


^^ That pretty much covers it.
 
2013-02-12 04:48:02 AM
Four times is a lower bound, right?
 
2013-02-12 04:51:17 AM

serial_crusher: By "some men" they mean farkers.

0 minutes grooming == (0 x 4) minutes having sex.


Ohhhh! It makes sense now.
 
2013-02-12 04:54:51 AM

nmrsnr: Well, duh, who doesn't spend 2 minutes shaving each morning?

/I've said too much.


this
 
2013-02-12 05:22:22 AM
I believe in taking care of myself in a balanced diet, in a rigorous exercise routine.
ln the morning, if my face is a little pufffy I'll put on an icepack while doing my stomach crunches.
I can do a thousand now.

After I remove the icepack, I use a deep pore cleanser lotion.
In the shower I use a water-activated gel cleanser, then a honey-almond bodyscrub.
And on the face, an exfoliating gelscrub.

Then I apply an herb mint facialmasque, which lleave on forten minutes while I prepare the rest of my routine.
I always use an aftershave lotion with little or no alcohol, because alcohol dries your face out and makes you look older.
Then moisturizer, then an anti-aging eye balm, followed by a final moisturizing protective lotion.
 
2013-02-12 05:36:32 AM

C18H27NO3: I believe in taking care of myself in a balanced diet, in a rigorous exercise routine.
ln the morning, if my face is a little pufffy I'll put on an icepack while doing my stomach crunches.
I can do a thousand now.

After I remove the icepack, I use a deep pore cleanser lotion.
In the shower I use a water-activated gel cleanser, then a honey-almond bodyscrub.
And on the face, an exfoliating gelscrub.

Then I apply an herb mint facialmasque, which lleave on forten minutes while I prepare the rest of my routine.
I always use an aftershave lotion with little or no alcohol, because alcohol dries your face out and makes you look older.
Then moisturizer, then an anti-aging eye balm, followed by a final moisturizing protective lotion.


God, I hope your boyfriend appreciates the amount of effort you put into that routine.
 
2013-02-12 05:44:05 AM
It found a third spend 17 minutes a day in front of the mirror
 How many of those minutes are spent fapping?
 
2013-02-12 05:51:45 AM
Well seeing that you have to spend a least a few minutes everyday making yourself presentable. You don't have sex everyday.
 
2013-02-12 05:56:10 AM
I'm not saying i have a gratuitous amount of sex, but this seems normal, if not low.  The amount of time I spend, brushing my teeth, showering, shaving, and manscaping far outweighs the amount of time I spend having sex.  To say otherwise would mak eme question your hygiene
 
2013-02-12 05:57:34 AM
i1079.photobucket.com
 
2013-02-12 06:00:35 AM

AverageAmericanGuy: God, I hope your boyfriend appreciates the amount of effort you put into that routine.


That's an absurdly non-obscure movie reference to miss, there.

25.media.tumblr.com
 
2013-02-12 06:01:24 AM

Jim_Callahan: AverageAmericanGuy: God, I hope your boyfriend appreciates the amount of effort you put into that routine.

That's an absurdly non-obscure movie reference to miss, there.

[25.media.tumblr.com image 458x451]


Sorry. What movie is that?
 
2013-02-12 06:01:59 AM
I spend 10 seconds combing my hair in the dark. We need a reasearch group to re-evaluate this.
 
2013-02-12 06:02:20 AM
Much of that "grooming" seems to be basic hygiene which you don't necessarily do because you want to get laid, but because having teeth pulled and skin infections isn't a whole lot of fun.
 
2013-02-12 06:04:52 AM

abhorrent1: It found a third spend 17 minutes a day in front of the mirror
 How many of those minutes are spent fapping?


17
 
2013-02-12 06:14:27 AM
 
2013-02-12 06:20:53 AM
It normally takes me about 15 minutes to have sex (if we're in a hurry).  So, this means I'm supposed to spend an hour getting ready?!  Who makes this stuff up?
 
2013-02-12 06:25:18 AM

AverageAmericanGuy: Jim_Callahan: AverageAmericanGuy: God, I hope your boyfriend appreciates the amount of effort you put into that routine.

That's an absurdly non-obscure movie reference to miss, there.

[25.media.tumblr.com image 458x451]

Sorry. What movie is that?


wow, just wow. do you like Huey Lewis and the news?
 
2013-02-12 06:34:03 AM

AverageAmericanGuy: Jim_Callahan: AverageAmericanGuy: God, I hope your boyfriend appreciates the amount of effort you put into that routine.

That's an absurdly non-obscure movie reference to miss, there.

[25.media.tumblr.com image 458x451]

Sorry. What movie is that?


Here's a clue, your handle is close
 
2013-02-12 06:34:06 AM
Hrm. I spend maybe 6 minutes a day in front of the mirror, teeth brushing. An extra 2 minutes once a week to shave, since I don't grow facial hair very fast on account of a wee bit of injun blood, and I keep my hair short and product free cause I'm not a hippie or a metrosexual. So not quite 40 minutes. These days the wife and I only bone an hour a week. Back before she put on her work stress weight, it was a good 10 or so hours of sex a week. Who spends 17 minutes in front of the mirror if you're not a homosexual or really in love with your reflection?
 
2013-02-12 06:47:36 AM
www.armagideon-time.com
 
2013-02-12 07:02:17 AM

AndyChrist_AUS: AverageAmericanGuy: Jim_Callahan: AverageAmericanGuy: God, I hope your boyfriend appreciates the amount of effort you put into that routine.

That's an absurdly non-obscure movie reference to miss, there.

[25.media.tumblr.com image 458x451]

Sorry. What movie is that?

Here's a clue, your handle is close


I`m guessing american psycho. Is it american psycho?
 
2013-02-12 07:18:23 AM
17 minutes a day in front of a mirror doesn't seem disgusting to me, but I don't know how long it takes a guy to shave. Let's say he shaves daily, brushes his teeth (and maybe flosses), then uses a mirror to tie a tie - wouldn't that account for about 17 minutes without spilling over into meterosexual territory?
 
2013-02-12 07:20:29 AM
It's called an investment in yourself.  Or,  you could just be a slob and get NO sex, but whatever strokes your snake...
 
2013-02-12 07:29:53 AM

Abox: [www.armagideon-time.com image 485x344]


ehhhh
 
2013-02-12 07:33:29 AM

dready zim: AndyChrist_AUS: AverageAmericanGuy: Jim_Callahan: AverageAmericanGuy: God, I hope your boyfriend appreciates the amount of effort you put into that routine.

That's an absurdly non-obscure movie reference to miss, there.

[25.media.tumblr.com image 458x451]

Sorry. What movie is that?

Here's a clue, your handle is close

I`m guessing american psycho. Is it american psycho?


Wayne Kerr
 
2013-02-12 07:34:42 AM
Does scratching my ass count as grooming or sex?
 
2013-02-12 07:57:36 AM
The 17 minutes a day in front of a mirror doesn't seem crazy, it is the only getting 30 minutes of sex a week that is sad.
 
2013-02-12 08:05:21 AM

entropic_existence: The 17 minutes a day in front of a mirror doesn't seem crazy, it is the only getting 30 minutes of sex a week that is sad.


Don't get married. Five years into your marital bliss, 30 minutes a week will seem like a full blown orgy.
 
2013-02-12 08:21:47 AM
Well, women spend hours grooming before going out and then they don't have sex. Isn't that worse?
 
2013-02-12 08:39:07 AM
This is why the Joy of Sex album comes equipped with BIG JIM SLADE.Big Jim, former tight end for the Kansas City Chiefs, is outfitted with various whips, chains, and a sexual appetite that will knock your socks off! Big Jim has satisfied women throughout the world, and the capital of Nebraska is Lincoln!
 
2013-02-12 08:40:08 AM
elia.jootamam.net
 
2013-02-12 09:09:02 AM

C18H27NO3: I believe in taking care of myself in a balanced diet, in a rigorous exercise routine.
ln the morning, if my face is a little pufffy I'll put on an icepack while doing my stomach crunches.
I can do a thousand now.

After I remove the icepack, I use a deep pore cleanser lotion.
In the shower I use a water-activated gel cleanser, then a honey-almond bodyscrub.
And on the face, an exfoliating gelscrub.

Then I apply an herb mint facialmasque, which lleave on forten minutes while I prepare the rest of my routine.
I always use an aftershave lotion with little or no alcohol, because alcohol dries your face out and makes you look older.
Then moisturizer, then an anti-aging eye balm, followed by a final moisturizing protective lotion.


You sound hot.
 
2013-02-12 09:20:16 AM

BetterMetalSnake: Does scratching my ass count as grooming or sex?


Both, and that makes you a very efficient person.
 
2013-02-12 09:39:52 AM

BetterMetalSnake: Does scratching my ass count as grooming or sex?


Foreplay
 
2013-02-12 09:42:24 AM
These sorts of things always prompt me to think of strange questions of the survey.   When they say 'time having sex' are they limiting it to just the raw, in and out thrusting part? Or, are they inclusive of all the foreplay leading up to that?
 
2013-02-12 09:51:30 AM

dready zim: AndyChrist_AUS: AverageAmericanGuy: Jim_Callahan: AverageAmericanGuy: God, I hope your boyfriend appreciates the amount of effort you put into that routine.

That's an absurdly non-obscure movie reference to miss, there.

[25.media.tumblr.com image 458x451]

Sorry. What movie is that?

Here's a clue, your handle is close

I`m guessing american psycho. Is it american psycho?


Wrong, the movie is Average Pyshco Guy
 
2013-02-12 10:02:01 AM
Being an "average" those numbers can be skewed depending on the scale used to determine it. For instance this week 0 sex and shaving daily would equal maybe 50-60 mins grooming vs 0 sexy time. Two weeks ago on the other hand we'd see shaving twice and maybe 41/2 - 5 hours of the sex. (maybe if I shaved less the sex would happen more?) A good portion of the sample for the survey would likely be single, meaning no regular sex pattern but regular grooming, that said if 2 hours a week is your average and you're getting nothing for it you're trying too hard. A real man never borrows a woman's make-up.

/he buys his own.
 
2013-02-12 10:30:48 AM

Nogale: 17 minutes a day in front of a mirror doesn't seem disgusting to me, but I don't know how long it takes a guy to shave. Let's say he shaves daily, brushes his teeth (and maybe flosses), then uses a mirror to tie a tie - wouldn't that account for about 17 minutes without spilling over into meterosexual territory?


For me, that's about accurate. And not being a morning person I tend to move in slow motion.
 
2013-02-12 10:58:03 AM
Back in the day these kinds of fellows were known as popinjays. But hey, to each his own.
 
2013-02-12 11:03:06 AM
I've never spend 12 hours grooming... guess I'm not one of these guys...
 
Displayed 50 of 57 comments

First | « | 1 | 2 | » | Last | Show all

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


This thread is closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »






Report