If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(NPR)   Get ready for another Super Volcano   (npr.org) divider line 116
    More: Scary, supervolcanoes, Earth, volcanic gas, seismic waves  
•       •       •

20772 clicks; posted to Main » on 11 Feb 2013 at 11:27 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



116 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

Archived thread
 
2013-02-11 11:29:58 AM
That's more Blow potential than Charlie Sheen on payday.
 
2013-02-11 11:30:09 AM
No.
 
2013-02-11 11:30:27 AM
i45.tinypic.com
 
2013-02-11 11:30:34 AM
That would be awesome.

 It's time to reduce the planet's population by...oh...about 3 billion.
 
2013-02-11 11:31:48 AM
Sometime within the next 100 million years or so. Real critical warning there, Mr. Geologist.
 
2013-02-11 11:31:48 AM
Michael Bay is patiently waiting

/watching and waiting... And when the time comes, he'll be there to learn it's secrets
 
2013-02-11 11:31:50 AM
*grabs marshmallows and sticks*

Ready!
 
2013-02-11 11:32:00 AM
So Taco Bell is adding sour cream to the Volcano or something?
 
2013-02-11 11:32:00 AM
FTA: Thorne published all this in the journal, Earth and Planetary Science Letters. He's rather calm about it, and says it is a slow process from blob to blowout - maybe 100 million years or so.

Okay, that's... plenty of time to get ready. Thanks for the heads up, subby.
 
2013-02-11 11:32:17 AM
So it's basically a big zit.
 
2013-02-11 11:33:26 AM
the funnier part is.. in "geologic time" 100 million years is like.. tomorrow.  seriously.
 
2013-02-11 11:33:49 AM
My three months of food and water won't matter, here in SLC.
*Poof* we are gone.
 
2013-02-11 11:34:43 AM
Hey, let's make a movie out of this! Starring Tommy Lee Jones and Anne Heche!
 
2013-02-11 11:34:57 AM

No Time To Explain: Michael Bay is patiently waiting

/watching and waiting... And when the time comes, he'll be there to learn it's secrets


No, 20 years ago Micheal Bay was told by a gypsy that a super-volcano would erupt someday in his lifetime.  So, he made it his mission to educate the population via a series of informative movies, hoping to save millions of lives.  That he made a tidy profit along the way was just a bonus to the life saving work he has done!

One day you will thank him for being able to out-run an explosion!
 
2013-02-11 11:35:21 AM
The main problem is Volcanic ash and it's not like the ash you find on the barbecue: it is made of tiny pieces of rock. If it falls on your roof, your house can collapse under it's weight. If it gets into contact with cars or airplanes, they will break down or crash. Even worse, if you inhale it, the ash will mix with the liquids in your lungs and form a cement-like substance. You'll literally drown in conrete!

 There are sulphurous gases that turn all rainfall into a blistering downpour of pure sulphuric acid for years to come. There are all kinds of chlorine-bearing compounds, that break down enough of the ozone layer to turn the Sun into a real killer. There's carbon dioxide, the greenhouse gas that not only nibbles at the ozone layer, but also causes long-term global warming. And last but not least, there's soot. A super eruption will darken the Sun, and gradually push the Earth into a nuclear winter for many years, or even centuries, we will have to survive in darkness and cold and no cable TV.
 
2013-02-11 11:36:51 AM

Deep Contact: A super eruption will darken the Sun, and gradually push the Earth into a nuclear winter for many years, or even centuries, we will have to survive in darkness and cold and no cable TV.


You make volcanos not fun :(
 
2013-02-11 11:37:24 AM

Deep Contact: no cable TV


Pfft, I don't even own a TV, who needs one with the Internet?
 
2013-02-11 11:37:35 AM
*reads article*

Don't be an idiot, idiot.
 
2013-02-11 11:37:45 AM
Nice goatse pic.
 
2013-02-11 11:37:50 AM
"We call it a blob of partially molten material," he says.

Dude, cool it with the scientific lingo - use words that we regular folks can understand.
 
2013-02-11 11:39:29 AM

Burr: No Time To Explain: Michael Bay is patiently waiting

/watching and waiting... And when the time comes, he'll be there to learn it's secrets

No, 20 years ago Micheal Bay was told by a gypsy that a super-volcano would erupt someday in his lifetime.  So, he made it his mission to educate the population via a series of informative movies, hoping to save millions of lives.  That he made a tidy profit along the way was just a bonus to the life saving work he has done!

One day you will thank him for being able to out-run an explosion!


It's always the gypsies, isn't it?

/ALWAYS
 
2013-02-11 11:39:34 AM

Deep Contact: The main problem is Volcanic ash and it's not like the ash you find on the barbecue: it is made of tiny pieces of rock. If it falls on your roof, your house can collapse under it's weight. If it gets into contact with cars or airplanes, they will break down or crash. Even worse, if you inhale it, the ash will mix with the liquids in your lungs and form a cement-like substance. You'll literally drown in conrete!

 There are sulphurous gases that turn all rainfall into a blistering downpour of pure sulphuric acid for years to come. There are all kinds of chlorine-bearing compounds, that break down enough of the ozone layer to turn the Sun into a real killer. There's carbon dioxide, the greenhouse gas that not only nibbles at the ozone layer, but also causes long-term global warming. And last but not least, there's soot. A super eruption will darken the Sun, and gradually push the Earth into a nuclear winter for many years, or even centuries, we will have to survive in darkness and cold...


Meh.

and no cable TV.

Oh my God...NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!


/Doesn't actually have cable
 
2013-02-11 11:40:49 AM
farm9.staticflickr.com

So, Subby, I see your mom's been to Yellowstone lately.
 
2013-02-11 11:41:42 AM

Deep Contact: we will have to survive in darkness and cold and no cable TV.


So, Northern Canada then?
 
2013-02-11 11:42:48 AM
We should be so lucky
 
2013-02-11 11:43:12 AM
Weren't Flood Basalts responsible for the End Permian extinctions that were worse than the giant asteroid that killed all the dinosaurs?

I mean, that's hot.
 
2013-02-11 11:43:19 AM
Old news is the best news and when you are at the now-kiddie shop NPR, you get to write fluff news. If one needs a case study in how to take one of the nation's best news organizations and reduce it to crap, NPR is it. So disappointing....
 
2013-02-11 11:45:01 AM

Canton: FTA: Thorne published all this in the journal, Earth and Planetary Science Letters. He's rather calm about it, and says it is a slow process from blob to blowout - maybe 100 million years or so.

Okay, that's... plenty of time to get ready. Thanks for the heads up, subby.


Great use of the scary tag too. Subby must pee his pants if someone walks behind him, or says hi.
 
2013-02-11 11:45:07 AM

Grapple: the funnier part is.. in "geologic time" 100 million years is like.. tomorrow.  seriously.


My paleontology professor once professed to not know much at all about human history he had not personally lived through. When someone mocked him for not getting a reference to Caesar, he said "Look that happened 2000 years ago. I'm an invertebrate paleontologist: I don't do  current events."
 
2013-02-11 11:45:17 AM
Not worried.  There are other supervolcanoes to worry about right now.  Another one a 100 million years from now...pshaw.
If someone had conclusive evidence that there will be no more bacon for anyone, permanently, like tomorrow, that's something to panic over.
 
2013-02-11 11:46:29 AM

StaleCoffee: Weren't Flood Basalts responsible for the End Permian extinctions that were worse than the giant asteroid that killed all the dinosaurs?

I mean, that's hot.


Maybe. Some people think the loss of shallow shore habitat due to the reassemby of the continents and the lack of land based plant life to moderate the climate changes caused by the same had a lot more to do with it.
 
2013-02-11 11:46:58 AM

gopher321: Hey, let's make a movie out of this! Starring Tommy Lee Jones Mia Kirshner and Anne Heche!


Wanted more kinky lesbian sex so I FTFY.
 
2013-02-11 11:47:17 AM
This will shut up those climate alarmists but good!

Weather Today: Nuclear Winter, with periods of Dark.
Temperature: Cold when not being peppered with lava bombs.
Winds: Sulphurous, scorching.
Forecast: Aaaaggghhh.
 
2013-02-11 11:47:41 AM
So if I read that right, the earth has piles.  I hear those can be a pain in the ass.
 
2013-02-11 11:49:11 AM
I don't have to outrun the super-volcano, I just have to outrun you.
 
2013-02-11 11:49:11 AM

HortusMatris: [farm9.staticflickr.com image 320x240]

So, Subby, I see your mom's been to Yellowstone lately.


Hey, that's the picture on the print edition of The Eye of Argon!

/think My Immortal, but actually original
 
2013-02-11 11:49:35 AM
I for one welcome this new form of global climate change.

At some point we all die, I would just prefer that it doesn't all happen at once.
 
2013-02-11 11:49:53 AM

CheatCommando: StaleCoffee: Weren't Flood Basalts responsible for the End Permian extinctions that were worse than the giant asteroid that killed all the dinosaurs?

I mean, that's hot.

Maybe. Some people think the loss of shallow shore habitat due to the reassemby of the continents and the lack of land based plant life to moderate the climate changes caused by the same had a lot more to do with it.


Wouldn't that be part of the chain of events after that though? I read that the flood basalts and atmospheric temperature increase released a bunch of methane from the ocean floors and ate all the oxygen or somesuch. Now I'm going to spend all day reading about extinction events.
 
2013-02-11 11:50:54 AM
i139.photobucket.com
Harry Turtledove would like to tell you about it.
 
2013-02-11 11:53:25 AM

Deep Contact: The main problem is Volcanic ash and it's not like the ash you find on the barbecue: it is made of tiny pieces of rock. If it falls on your roof, your house can collapse under it's weight. If it gets into contact with cars or airplanes, they will break down or crash. Even worse, if you inhale it, the ash will mix with the liquids in your lungs and form a cement-like substance. You'll literally drown in conrete!

 There are sulphurous gases that turn all rainfall into a blistering downpour of pure sulphuric acid for years to come. There are all kinds of chlorine-bearing compounds, that break down enough of the ozone layer to turn the Sun into a real killer. There's carbon dioxide, the greenhouse gas that not only nibbles at the ozone layer, but also causes long-term global warming. And last but not least, there's soot. A super eruption will darken the Sun, and gradually push the Earth into a nuclear winter for many years, or even centuries, we will have to survive in darkness and cold and no cable TV.


I have Direct TV so I'm ok.
 
2013-02-11 11:54:31 AM

CheatCommando: StaleCoffee: Weren't Flood Basalts responsible for the End Permian extinctions that were worse than the giant asteroid that killed all the dinosaurs?

I mean, that's hot.

Maybe. Some people think the loss of shallow shore habitat due to the reassemby of the continents and the lack of land based plant life to moderate the climate changes caused by the same had a lot more to do with it.


With the giant asteroid that killed all the dinosaurs at the end of the Cretaceous, there were other major geologic events that were happening as well.  There were massive volcanic eruptions in India at about the same geologic time, other asteroid impacts, and the sea levels were lowering as well.  So the Yucatan impact might have just been one factor out of many.
 
2013-02-11 11:55:30 AM

eyeq360: Not worried.  There are other supervolcanoes to worry about right now.  Another one a 100 million years from now...pshaw.
If someone had conclusive evidence that there will be no more bacon for anyone, permanently, like tomorrow, that's something to panic over.



One example is the Yellowstone super volcano, which has blown its top three times in the past 2 million years.
Thorne published all this in the journal, Earth and Planetary Science Letters. He's rather calm about it, and says it is a slow process from blob to blowout - maybe 100 million years or so.


So once every 600,000 years?
So WHY would he pull 100My out of his arse?
 
2013-02-11 11:55:35 AM

KangTheMad: Canton: FTA: Thorne published all this in the journal, Earth and Planetary Science Letters. He's rather calm about it, and says it is a slow process from blob to blowout - maybe 100 million years or so.

Okay, that's... plenty of time to get ready. Thanks for the heads up, subby.

Great use of the scary tag too. Subby must pee his pants if someone walks behind him, or says hi.


And you just know he'll be cowering in a bunker somewhere on Friday...

/Geologic time and astronomic distance. Gotta love 'em.
 
2013-02-11 11:56:08 AM

Mr. Eugenides: So if I read that right, the earth has piles.  I hear those can be a pain in the ass.


It's also infested with humans.

/run mars run!
 
2013-02-11 11:56:35 AM

CheatCommando: Grapple: the funnier part is.. in "geologic time" 100 million years is like.. tomorrow.  seriously.

My paleontology professor once professed to not know much at all about human history he had not personally lived through. When someone mocked him for not getting a reference to Caesar, he said "Look that happened 2000 years ago. I'm an invertebrate paleontologist: I don't do  current events."


Although...isn't 100 million years still a pretty long time, even geologically speaking?  The Earth is *only* 4.5 billion years old right? And unless I am doing my math horribly, horribly wrong, there would be about 45 periods of 100 million years since the earth started...so, the next 100 million years is 1/45th or 1/46th of the total lifespan of the Earth (to date)...I'm not sure if I would call that *tomorrow*, but really it is semantics I guess.

/I'd call it the Earth's mid-life crisis maybe?
//Or "next week" since it is close to 1/52...but that is if you only live for 1 year...
/Did I have a point? No.
 
2013-02-11 11:57:14 AM

namatad: eyeq360: Not worried.  There are other supervolcanoes to worry about right now.  Another one a 100 million years from now...pshaw.
If someone had conclusive evidence that there will be no more bacon for anyone, permanently, like tomorrow, that's something to panic over.


One example is the Yellowstone super volcano, which has blown its top three times in the past 2 million years.
Thorne published all this in the journal, Earth and Planetary Science Letters. He's rather calm about it, and says it is a slow process from blob to blowout - maybe 100 million years or so.

So once every 600,000 years?
So WHY would he pull 100My out of his arse?


If you had 100My in your ass wouldn't you want it out?
 
2013-02-11 11:57:19 AM

namatad: eyeq360: Not worried.  There are other supervolcanoes to worry about right now.  Another one a 100 million years from now...pshaw.
If someone had conclusive evidence that there will be no more bacon for anyone, permanently, like tomorrow, that's something to panic over.


One example is the Yellowstone super volcano, which has blown its top three times in the past 2 million years.
Thorne published all this in the journal, Earth and Planetary Science Letters. He's rather calm about it, and says it is a slow process from blob to blowout - maybe 100 million years or so.

So once every 600,000 years?
So WHY would he pull 100My out of his arse?


because if you had read tfa, you would know it isn't a supervolcano yet. The semi-molten material is still only just forming. It's like a really massive stick of butter that's only now starting to melt.
 
2013-02-11 11:57:39 AM
 
2013-02-11 11:58:37 AM

Lost Thought 00: Sometime within the next 100 million years or so. Real critical warning there, Mr. Geologist.


I doubt the timescale, since the Earth is only 6,000 years old.
 
2013-02-11 11:59:21 AM
Maybe if we sacrifice a few virgins ...

Quick to Bronycon!
 
2013-02-11 11:59:57 AM

Burr: One day you will thank him for being able to out-run an explosion!


2.bp.blogspot.com

Silly, you don't out-run them. You walk away slowly without looking at them like a boss.
 
2013-02-11 12:01:42 PM
Another?  Its the same damn one they keep talking about.

Every mention of Super Volcano is Yellowstone.
 
2013-02-11 12:03:38 PM

Snort: Another?  Its the same damn one they keep talking about.

Every mention of Super Volcano is Yellowstone.


Nah, it's under Samoa.

And if I discovered it, I would name it shiat. So eventually in the future, the news headlines will read "Shiat's gonna blow"
 
2013-02-11 12:04:09 PM
The process takes 100 million years... but the results manifest every few million years?

I think there *may* just be some gaps in the context, to square those statements.
 
2013-02-11 12:04:37 PM

Snort: Another?  Its the same damn one they keep talking about.

Every mention of Super Volcano is Yellowstone.


Yea what's gonna be funny is when one blows and it's not Yellowstone, well not so much HaHa funny but...
 
2013-02-11 12:04:59 PM
FTFA: Think of the Earth as an avocado, and the pit is the core.

Avocados are not round.
 
2013-02-11 12:07:42 PM

Random Anonymous Blackmail: FTFA: Think of the Earth as an avocado, and the pit is the core.

Avocados are not round.


Nor is Earth, it's an oblate spheroid.
 
2013-02-11 12:07:47 PM

Random Anonymous Blackmail: FTFA: Think of the Earth as an avocado, and the pit is the core.

Avocados are not round.


Neither is the earth!

/not a perfect spheriod
 
2013-02-11 12:08:13 PM
www.global-air.com

Everything you want to know about volcanoes. (new window)
 
2013-02-11 12:08:28 PM

Random Anonymous Blackmail: FTFA: Think of the Earth as an avocado, and the pit is the core.

Avocados are not round.


Neither is the Earth?
 
2013-02-11 12:08:41 PM

KangTheMad: Random Anonymous Blackmail: FTFA: Think of the Earth as an avocado, and the pit is the core.

Avocados are not round.

Nor is Earth, it's an oblate spheroid.


You win this round...but I shall return!
 
2013-02-11 12:11:06 PM
Is there really anything we can do about this? I'd figure the geologists would have some crazy plan to stop/halt the build up.

I mean aside from building vast self sustaining underground compounds (MINESHAFT GAP), any one of these going off looks like an extinction level event.

I mean we COULD go to space, but a self sustaining Moon/Mars base is a hundred years off, easy.
 
2013-02-11 12:11:55 PM

Burr: KangTheMad: Random Anonymous Blackmail: FTFA: Think of the Earth as an avocado, and the pit is the core.

Avocados are not round.

Nor is Earth, it's an oblate spheroid.

You win this round...but I shall return!


And I'll be waiting, and I'll be your Hamilton.
 
2013-02-11 12:14:15 PM
OK Everybody - Time to don your parrot hat and sing along!

I don't know
I don't know
I don't know
where I'm a-gonna go
When the volcano blows!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wSNxu_405Mk
 
2013-02-11 12:14:28 PM
We need to lit these high capacity assault volcanos
 
2013-02-11 12:15:06 PM

Government Fromage: We need to lit these high capacity assault volcanos


Limit
 
2013-02-11 12:16:15 PM
Burr

Random Anonymous Blackmail: FTFA: Think of the Earth as an avocado, and the pit is the core.

Avocados are not round.

Neither is the earth!

/not a perfect spheriod


True, round being used as a general term.
 
2013-02-11 12:19:38 PM
Anaximander told me the earth is really a push pop.
 
2013-02-11 12:20:54 PM
Wow. Talk about an article written down to the lowest common denominator. Rock piles.....rock piles.....oh, yeah, rock piles.
 
2013-02-11 12:22:06 PM

Old Gnarled Oak: I don't have to outrun the super-volcano, I just have to outrun you.

media.tumblr.com

/I lol'd : D
 
2013-02-11 12:22:42 PM
All we need to do is pass legislation outlawing volcanoes.

/problem solved
 
2013-02-11 12:24:00 PM
A super eruption will darken the Sun, and gradually push the Earth into a nuclear winter for many years, or even centuries, we will have to survive in darkness and cold...
i208.photobucket.com
 
2013-02-11 12:24:12 PM

nmemkha: All we need to do is pass legislation outlawing volcanoes.

/problem solved


Somehow I believe this will happen ; )
 
2013-02-11 12:26:27 PM

Alebak: I mean we COULD go to space, but a self sustaining Moon/Mars base is a hundred years off, easy.


we could start building a moonbase tomorrow. it would take redirecting, say, 90% of the dod budget.
economy of scale would greatly reduce the launch costs quickly.
redirecting the military industrial complex of weapons to moonbase stuff would keep unemployment from growing out of control.

but humans have never been good at long term planning

KangTheMad: because if you had read tfa, you would know it isn't a supervolcano yet. The semi-molten material is still only just forming. It's like a really massive stick of butter that's only now starting to melt.


http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Supervolcano#Massive_explosive_eruption s
Strangely enough, this isnt the first article which I have read on the subject. In fact, this is less an article and more light, news-candy.
Given the number and frequency of the last 10-20 yellowstone hotspot eruptions, I somehow doubt that this guys 100My number is correct. My guess is that he was misquoted or quoted out of context or didnt want to sound like a tool by saying that we are overdue for an eruption.

I will bet 37exadollars that we have a super volcano eruption in the next 1My.
/yes, I will be there to collect your losing bet.
/lol
 
2013-02-11 12:27:36 PM

uncleacid: Nice goatse pic.


More like this...

i.imgur.com
 
2013-02-11 12:29:36 PM
cache.gizmodo.com
 
2013-02-11 12:32:10 PM
I'm not sure I get the worrying about it part.  If Mother Earth wants to wipe herself clean of humans, we are pretty farked.  No amount of preparation will allow us to live through something like that.....and who in the fark would want to anyway?

Like the prepers.  Good for you for surviving doomsday.  Now you get to live in a wasteland with very few other humans and little to no surviving infrastructure.  I'm not sure WHY you think that's awesome.
 
2013-02-11 12:33:10 PM
There are six known supervolcanoes on dry land, while some six more are located under the oceans. Three of these supervolcanoes are in the United States: Yellowstone in Wyoming, Long Valley in California, and Valles Caldera in New Mexico
 
2013-02-11 12:34:56 PM
Bodies were molded from volcanic ash during the Pompeii eruption.
pompeiidiscoveries.webs.com
 
2013-02-11 12:38:38 PM
Super volcanoes are the hipster-bacon of the disaster world.
 
2013-02-11 12:39:39 PM
And it will erupt all because someone does this:

http://www.liveleak.com/view?i=a94_1340566754

(ignore the title that references a person, it's garbage. Literally!)
 
2013-02-11 12:41:51 PM

doczoidberg: That would be awesome.

 It's time to reduce the planet's population by...oh...about 3 billion.


I think we're quite capable of doing that without any help from Mother Nature, thank you for offering.

Many countries are facing a demographic population bust from aging populations (a billion there), there's massive risk of political and economic collapse in other countries (a billion) and then there's climate change and sea-level rise--Bangladesh is basically a giant river delta that's barely above water at the best of times (a billion people could lose their lives due to flooding, starvation or migration).

Stay the course à la George "Peanut Butter Sandwich" Bush and population will peak at 9 or 10 billion, then drop by half over the next century or two.

We could also face a food crisis bigger than the one feared in the 1970s.

The people who mock at environmentalists and other "alarmists" aren't out of the Malthusian woods yet. Malthus never named a date. He's not tied down to any particular resource peak or collapse. All of the quibbles are based on a misunderstanding of Malthus' point or begging the question. Sure, we haven't hit the wall--yet--but he never said WHEN we would hit the wall. He never said which resource would run out and leave us fighting over what's left of a declining pile. He never anticipated rapid technological growth but then again, can you eat computer chips? No. And making them uses increasing amounts of scarce fresh water, reducing the amount of food you CAN eat.

We don't need no stinking volcanoes. We are our own nemesis. Of course, the volcanoes, asteroids, solar flares, and so forth are real threats and they'll get us eventually, but not necessarily in the next few centuries--some of them are long shots, not immediate and present dangers.

Personally, I suspect that the carrying capacity of the Earth in the long run is about 3 billion--which is about what the population was when I was born. At that level of population we were not depleting the oceans fish stocks or destroying the world's rain forests yet. With technology, a lot of environmental work rebuilding damaged ecosystems, birth control, a balanced population, neither too old nor too young, and wisdom and luck, we could sustain such a population provided we start working at it yesterday.

We need a lot of maintenance and repairs to reach that long-term sustainability, however.

Lots of luck, humanity, you stupid slut!
 
2013-02-11 12:43:01 PM
s3.amazonaws.com
 
2013-02-11 12:45:08 PM

DoBeDoBeDo: I'm not sure I get the worrying about it part.  If Mother Earth wants to wipe herself clean of humans, we are pretty farked.  No amount of preparation will allow us to live through something like that.....and who in the fark would want to anyway?

Like the prepers.  Good for you for surviving doomsday.  Now you get to live in a wasteland with very few other humans and little to no surviving infrastructure.  I'm not sure WHY you think that's awesome.


Their descendents will presumably repopulate the Earth.

www.ngmweb.com
 
2013-02-11 12:45:32 PM

Old Gnarled Oak: I don't have to outrun the super-volcano, I just have to outrun you.


Um, I think this might be one of those things where that rule doesn't work. The thing is, the smothering super-hot pyroclastic flow can get to the place you're running to before you do, which more or less means that it won't be there any more, even if it didn't block transportation by air, water and land ahead of you.

But, of course, I am aware you are almost certainly joking. I just like pointing out the obvious because I've learned that people need help seeing it far more often than you'd think.
 
2013-02-11 12:47:18 PM

BobCumbers: Deep Contact: The main problem is Volcanic ash and it's not like the ash you find on the barbecue: it is made of tiny pieces of rock. If it falls on your roof, your house can collapse under it's weight. If it gets into contact with cars or airplanes, they will break down or crash. Even worse, if you inhale it, the ash will mix with the liquids in your lungs and form a cement-like substance. You'll literally drown in conrete!

 There are sulphurous gases that turn all rainfall into a blistering downpour of pure sulphuric acid for years to come. There are all kinds of chlorine-bearing compounds, that break down enough of the ozone layer to turn the Sun into a real killer. There's carbon dioxide, the greenhouse gas that not only nibbles at the ozone layer, but also causes long-term global warming. And last but not least, there's soot. A super eruption will darken the Sun, and gradually push the Earth into a nuclear winter for many years, or even centuries, we will have to survive in darkness and cold and no cable TV.

I have Direct TV so I'm ok.


DirectTv doesn't work when it's raining, let alone when it is raining sulphur and ash.  You will be the first to go insane from loss of tv.
 
2013-02-11 12:49:33 PM

dryknife: There are six known supervolcanoes on dry land, while some six more are located under the oceans. Three of these supervolcanoes are in the United States: Yellowstone in Wyoming, Long Valley in California, and Valles Caldera in New Mexico


So, um... Nothing to worry about, right? At least for those of us in Florida?

Oh wait, there's a reason for the Florida tag, which would probably make up for any chances of survival during a SV eruption...
 
2013-02-11 12:49:51 PM

Deep Contact: Bodies were molded from volcanic ash during the Pompeii eruption.
[pompeiidiscoveries.webs.com image 409x281]


was he fapping?
 
2013-02-11 12:51:28 PM
I'm more concerned about that island off of africa.  Story is that if an earthquake happens near there that enough soil will slide into the ocean to cause a giant tsunami heading towards the east coast. Or something like that.
 
2013-02-11 12:52:36 PM
Hope ours goes before the one in Italy. USA! USA! USA!

Italy volcano raising anxiety

http://www.news24.com/Green/News/Italy-volcano-raising-anxiety-20130 20 5

Naples - A restive "super volcano" west of Naples is raising nervousness in the local Italian population. The ground of the Campi Flegrei "burning fields", also known as the Phlegraean Fields, has risen more in recent weeks than it has in a long time.

Drill Baby Drill

Yes they drilled theirs...
 
2013-02-11 12:54:22 PM
So I guess the question is, if any of these super volcanoes blow, where are you (and your offspring) most likely to survive?  They said eruptions can last 1,000 years, but even 10 or 20 years is going to exhaust the best preppers shelter.

I assume regardless of which one blows, pretty much the entire planet is going to deal with the ash, and that the sun is going to be blocked out for a long time.
 
2013-02-11 12:56:58 PM
The Yellowstone National Park super volcano has erupted about three times in the last couple of million years. Depending on the wind direction and the size of the eruption, it covered a large part of the West, and can even reach into Canada. A big eruption would not spare Ottawa or Montreal.

So much for Canadian congenital smugness. We're not out of danger in Southern Ontario, or possibly the industrial corridor of Quebec even. Two thirds of the population of Canada is down-wind from the super-volcano, so to speak.

I'm afraid that if a big eruption happened, New England and the Atlantic provinces of Canada might have to ask the Mother Country if we could move back in with the Commonwealth for a while, pending an opportunity to get our house in order. Enough of the West Coast would probably survive to prevent the Mexicans from claiming the whole South West and maybe there'd be survivors in the South and Florida, God help us all if you have to restock the United States with those schmucks.

I mean really, they weren't God's first choice as His Chosen People, which is why he keeps pounding them with hurricanes, tornadoes and other natural disasters, although the message never seems to get through.
 
2013-02-11 12:57:24 PM
poetrybrain.files.wordpress.com

Oh my GOD! WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE!!!
 
2013-02-11 12:58:14 PM

brantgoose: doczoidberg: That would be awesome.

 It's time to reduce the planet's population by...oh...about 3 billion.

I think we're quite capable of doing that without any help from Mother Nature, thank you for offering.

Many countries are facing a demographic population bust from aging populations (a billion there), there's massive risk of political and economic collapse in other countries (a billion) and then there's climate change and sea-level rise--Bangladesh is basically a giant river delta that's barely above water at the best of times (a billion people could lose their lives due to flooding, starvation or migration).

Stay the course à la George "Peanut Butter Sandwich" Bush and population will peak at 9 or 10 billion, then drop by half over the next century or two.

We could also face a food crisis bigger than the one feared in the 1970s.

The people who mock at environmentalists and other "alarmists" aren't out of the Malthusian woods yet. Malthus never named a date. He's not tied down to any particular resource peak or collapse. All of the quibbles are based on a misunderstanding of Malthus' point or begging the question. Sure, we haven't hit the wall--yet--but he never said WHEN we would hit the wall. He never said which resource would run out and leave us fighting over what's left of a declining pile. He never anticipated rapid technological growth but then again, can you eat computer chips? No. And making them uses increasing amounts of scarce fresh water, reducing the amount of food you CAN eat.

We don't need no stinking volcanoes. We are our own nemesis. Of course, the volcanoes, asteroids, solar flares, and so forth are real threats and they'll get us eventually, but not necessarily in the next few centuries--some of them are long shots, not immediate and present dangers.

Personally, I suspect that the carrying capacity of the Earth in the long run is about 3 billion--which is about what the population was when I was born. At that level of population we ...


You forgot one: Crowding due to overpopulation has historically resulted in communicable diseases that proliferate through the populace like wildfire. Add to that our new-found ability to abuse antibiotics in such a way as to create drug resistant strains and worldwide transportation. Depopulation is only a sneeze away.
 
2013-02-11 12:58:55 PM
Seen 'em on PBS! Born to love volcanoes. My apartment is a mess.

Maybe they need my money more than a man without a home. Gonna' watch a documentary about the footpaths of ancient Rome.

Born to love volcanoes volcanoes volcanoes volcanooooooeeeeeeeeeees
 
2013-02-11 12:59:26 PM
Picture in the article is obviously fake due to the lack of a wedding band.
 
2013-02-11 01:00:00 PM
4.bp.blogspot.com
 
2013-02-11 01:00:12 PM

Random Anonymous Blackmail: FTFA: Think of the Earth as an avocado, and the pit is the core.

Avocados are not round.


Well, the Earth has gone sort of pear-shaped, also.
 
2013-02-11 01:02:57 PM

drayno76: [cache.gizmodo.com image 504x614]


ugg...yeah, good example that overheated volcanoes make toxic smoke, not nice vapour.

/felt my throat twitch just looking at that douches bags
 
2013-02-11 01:03:18 PM

Deep Contact: Bodies were molded from volcanic ash during the Pompeii eruption.
[pompeiidiscoveries.webs.com image 409x281]


i.imgur.com
 
2013-02-11 01:10:03 PM
The coffee enema thread was last week, dude.
 
2013-02-11 01:13:03 PM
steelturman.typepad.com
 
2013-02-11 01:17:11 PM
I like how every other person on the NPR comments thread comes across as an "expert".  Correcting each other, citing studies and such...as though any of them actually knew more than an atom of info before they hurried off to the mighty Google to find something to support their opinion.

Come to think of it, NPR and Fark have a lot in common that way...
 
2013-02-11 01:33:13 PM

doczoidberg: That would be awesome.

 It's time to reduce the planet's population by...oh...about 3 billion.


starting with you and your family, sure.
 
2013-02-11 02:09:46 PM

ChipNASA: uncleacid: Nice goatse pic.

More like this...

[i.imgur.com image 555x418]


Ring on both hands.  Two point deduction.
 
2013-02-11 02:24:38 PM
If Discovery Channel will not spend 60 min hyping/teasing about somethin, NPR shouldn't bother either.
 
2013-02-11 02:37:01 PM
This is why I decided to get my PhD in C.H.U.D.
 
2013-02-11 02:37:25 PM

ItchyBrother: [s3.amazonaws.com image 600x450]


Those blobs appear to be swelling, leading to sympathetic tectonic rises in my southern hemisphere, but I'm too hypnotized by the awesome power of nature to run away.
 
2013-02-11 02:48:24 PM

Deep Contact: Bodies were molded from volcanic ash during the Pompeii eruption.
[pompeiidiscoveries.webs.com image 409x281]



That guy must have known the ash was about to come down, and decided, "Fark it. I'm going to squeeze one more off while I still have the chance!"

I admire him.
 
2013-02-11 03:03:32 PM

doczoidberg: That would be awesome.

 It's time to reduce the planet's population by...oh...about 3 billion.


You and your family can go first.
 
2013-02-11 03:18:48 PM

doczoidberg: That would be awesome.

 It's time to reduce the planet's population by...oh...about 3 billion.


Most people who agree that this is an excellent idea. The problem is finding three billion volunteers.

/my wife and I are not having kids
//how about you?
 
Bf+
2013-02-11 04:26:38 PM

Deep Contact: The main problem is Volcanic ash and it's not like the ash you find on the barbecue: it is made of tiny pieces of rock. If it falls on your roof, your house can collapse under it's weight. If it gets into contact with cars or airplanes, they will break down or crash. Even worse, if you inhale it, the ash will mix with the liquids in your lungs and form a cement-like substance. You'll literally drown in conrete!

 There are sulphurous gases that turn all rainfall into a blistering downpour of pure sulphuric acid for years to come. There are all kinds of chlorine-bearing compounds, that break down enough of the ozone layer to turn the Sun into a real killer. There's carbon dioxide, the greenhouse gas that not only nibbles at the ozone layer, but also causes long-term global warming. And last but not least, there's soot. A super eruption will darken the Sun, and gradually push the Earth into a nuclear winter for many years, or even centuries, we will have to survive in darkness and cold and no cable TV.


That right there is an awesome post.
 
2013-02-11 06:16:41 PM

Grapple: the funnier part is.. in "geologic time" 100 million years is like.. tomorrow.  seriously.


That would be true if recorded human history only stretched back for a month and a half. (1 day = 100 million years means 45 days = 4.5 billion years, or, the age of the Earth).

It's relatively short, but even in geologic time it's a significant amount of time. After all, 100 million years ago, Brazil was just off the coast of Africa.
 
2013-02-11 07:54:07 PM
This posted yet (oblig)?  Apologies if duplicate, not all pics came through at work:
imgs.xkcd.com
 
2013-02-12 12:54:03 PM
YellowStone DOES seem to be a recurring entry  http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Megavolcano
Deaths 1000 miles away  http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ashfall_Fossil_Beds
but no mention of Santorini  http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Santorini
 
2013-02-12 01:14:25 PM

KangTheMad: Nah, it's under Samoa.


"Stop pushing, Daddy!"

/ obscure?
// couldn't find the actual strip online
 
Displayed 116 of 116 comments

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


This thread is archived, and closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »






Report