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(Time)   Facebook can make you depressed when you realize how much better your "friends" lives are   (healthland.time.com) divider line 104
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4247 clicks; posted to Main » on 10 Feb 2013 at 2:04 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-02-10 10:53:16 AM
Until you realize they're all lying and/or neurotic.
 
2013-02-10 11:01:41 AM
Until they realize I am the one who will lead them to salvation. So say we all.
 
2013-02-10 11:26:26 AM
I don't have any friends,therefore I don't use Facebook.
Not even my wife will talk to me.
 
2013-02-10 11:31:59 AM
Is this a repeat? It sounds like it should be, but I'm not certain

Anyway, the take home message is -- you live every moment of your life, including all the boring, uninteresting "poop is coming out" moments. Your friend's facebook feeds are just the exciting highlights. You only see the pictures of their vacations, not pictures of them doing the dishes.
 
2013-02-10 11:41:42 AM
Particularly when a "buddy" of yours that owes you $6500 bucks is posting pictures of new stuff he is buying and traveling without paying you back even one red cent.
 
2013-02-10 12:40:35 PM

Beerguy: Particularly when a "buddy" of yours that owes you $6500 bucks is posting pictures of new stuff he is buying and traveling without paying you back even one red cent.


You sound bitter.

/I would be too
 
2013-02-10 12:54:37 PM
Facebook is a tool to make your life seem better than it actually is, not the other way around.
 
2013-02-10 01:12:13 PM

ajgeek: Facebook is full of a tools  to make your life seem better than it actually is, not the other way around.


FTFY
 
2013-02-10 02:06:55 PM

Beerguy: Particularly when a "buddy" of yours that owes you $6500 bucks is posting pictures of new stuff he is buying and traveling without paying you back even one red cent.


I can't ever imagine loaning more than 1/5th of my annual salary to someone who can only be classified as "buddy"

/or to anyone else, for that matter.
 
2013-02-10 02:08:30 PM
The most common cause of Facebook frustration came from users comparing themselves socially to their peers, while the second most common source of dissatisfaction was "lack of attention" from having fewer comments, likes and general feedback compared to friends.

Wow, first world problems indeed. How about just not using Facebook if it makes you sad?
 
2013-02-10 02:08:48 PM
I have a few Facebook friends that seem determined to convince the world their life is awesome.  Deep down, I might suspect they are trying to convince themselves.
 
2013-02-10 02:09:06 PM
People tend to present themselves on Facebook the same way they represent themselves in real life.  If you're good at selling yourself, you're going to post about the great night you had with your friends and you're going to refrain from posting about the night you spent drinking vodka and crying. It's not like it was ever a glimpse into what your life is like, it's a glimpse of what you want other people to believe your life is like.
 
2013-02-10 02:09:45 PM
People still use Facebook?  Closed and deleted my account years ago.  My life isn't that interesting, and honestly, neither is yours.
 
2013-02-10 02:09:48 PM
Aren't most facebook users depressed anyway because they're either teenagers or the elderly and infirmed?
 
2013-02-10 02:09:53 PM
On the contrary, my FB friends make me feel better about myself. It's like watching Hoarders and realizing my house isn't all that messy after all.
 
2013-02-10 02:09:58 PM
Maybe it's because I'm getting older, but my friends used Facebook as a sounding board to biatch about their kids. I closed my account because it was making me depressed.
/Child-free
//Thank god apparently
 
2013-02-10 02:10:35 PM
That is one of the gayest things I ever read.  I cant imagine being so petty and self absorbed as to get upset if someone else has more "likes", comments, vacations or money.  Probably one of the reasons I have never used facebook or any other social network (excluding linked in which sort of serves a purpose).
 
2013-02-10 02:13:20 PM

Donnchadha: Is this a repeat? It sounds like it should be, but I'm not certain

Anyway, the take home message is -- you live every moment of your life, including all the boring, uninteresting "poop is coming out" moments. Your friend's facebook feeds are just the exciting highlights. You only see the pictures of their vacations, not pictures of them doing the dishes.


If only. I'm subjected to boring meals, kid poop updates, idiotic "million likes" posts, idiotic conservative propaganda, etc.
 
2013-02-10 02:14:23 PM

HaywoodJablonski: If only. I'm subjected to boring meals, kid poop updates, idiotic "million likes" posts, idiotic conservative propaganda, etc.


Then facebook is probably not making you depressed
 
2013-02-10 02:14:48 PM

Ima4nic8or: I cant imagine being so petty and self absorbed as to get upset if someone else has more "likes", comments, vacations or money.


I imagine you are happier than most people.
 
2013-02-10 02:16:27 PM

Ima4nic8or: That is one of the gayest things I ever read.  I cant imagine being so petty and self absorbed as to get upset if someone else has more "likes", comments, vacations or money.  Probably one of the reasons I have never used facebook or any other social network (excluding linked in which sort of serves a purpose).


My favorite is people dismissing your opinions on Twitter because they have more followers than you.  It's like a modern Monty Python sketch.
 
2013-02-10 02:18:20 PM
uh, no, all my friends lives suck equally to mine. if anything it makes me depressed that all of our lives collectively suck so much.
 
2013-02-10 02:19:08 PM

Beerguy: Particularly when a "buddy" of yours that owes you $6500 bucks is posting pictures of new stuff he is buying and traveling without paying you back even one red cent.


Must have been some really good sex you two were having.
 
2013-02-10 02:19:21 PM
I guess these people have never heard of the "hide" feature- I probably have about 4 people that actually show up on my feed...they are the only ones with anything interesting at all to read.  I know I don't do anything interesting, since I have two kids...but I do the world a favor and don't post anything about 99% of the time.  I know people don't really care if my kids are teething or not.
 
2013-02-10 02:21:01 PM
Believe me the dozens of baby pictures and complaints about no sleep, stretched budgets and lack of down time really gets to me.  Just yesterday one of my friends posted a fuzzy story about how to keep paying for daycare he had to take a second job, I almost spat my greygoose all over the patio around the resort's pool, I was so envious.

imgs.xkcd.com
 
2013-02-10 02:21:31 PM
Facebook can make you depressed when you realize how much better your friends "lives" are

FTFSubby
 
2013-02-10 02:23:08 PM
It is interesting to watch people you know have messy lives online telling the world how wonderful they are while you know they are a train wreck. Most of the people I know who post happy look at how great we are photos are full of shiat. I stopped logging on because it is hard for me to watch all the bragging. The compliment fishing ticks me off too. Especially when it comes to overblowing kid's accomplishments. Wow! Little Joey can write his name. Well holy fark you are a super parent and he must be a genius. Nevermind I saw you in Walmart ready to smack little Joey upside the head because he is actually a monster.
 
2013-02-10 02:25:02 PM
spacebison.com
 
2013-02-10 02:25:38 PM

BumpInTheNight: Believe me the dozens of baby pictures and complaints about no sleep, stretched budgets and lack of down time really gets to me.  Just yesterday one of my friends posted a fuzzy story about how to keep paying for daycare he had to take a second job, I almost spat my greygoose all over the patio around the resort's pool, I was so envious.


I feel for you. Must be hard to live with all that jealousy. Next time you are getting a massage poolside just remember not all people can be lucky. Life is rough, and you seem to have pulled the short straw.
 
2013-02-10 02:26:45 PM

SpaceBison: [spacebison.com image 511x103]


My favorite part is that she doesn't specify whose turd.
 
2013-02-10 02:26:49 PM
oh...so you think they put the truth up there??


/you haven't been on the internet long have you...
 
2013-02-10 02:28:06 PM
I am amazed by the number of otherwise intelligent people I know who have been sucked into the Facebook phenom.
First of all, if you want to publicize yourself on the Web, pay honest money for a decent website.
Secondly, why would you want to publicize yourself on the Web, unless "you" are a business or legitimate nonprofit?
 
2013-02-10 02:28:38 PM
*shrug* So can sitcoms. Did you guys know: If you go to the same bar night after night, drink lots of beer and liquor and eat wings and fries and burgers constantly, there is a very SMALL chance you will come out looking like Neil Patrick Harris and getting laid constantly? True story!

/just finished HIMYM season 2
//nobody's lives are that cool
///turns out TV is fantasy. And so are your friends facebook pages.
 
2013-02-10 02:30:24 PM
I thought I read somewhere that the only way you can be depressed with Facebook is when you don't realize people are posting their "greatest hits" of their lives. They'll talk about the good things that happened to them and play down the bad unless there's a way to get something good out of sympathy. "Fishing for Complements" is what I call it.
 
2013-02-10 02:30:33 PM
We'd all be a lot happier if only we realized how, deep down inside, everyone is miserable.
 
2013-02-10 02:30:53 PM
Facebook can make you depressed when you realize how much better narcissistic and judgmental your friends lives are

/FTFM
 
2013-02-10 02:30:59 PM
Its not an issue for me anymore. Most of my FB "friends" I know in RL. I've always been aware that my life has sucked compared to theirs.
 
2013-02-10 02:32:54 PM

murdoch's_weeners: *shrug* So can sitcoms. Did you guys know: If you go to the same bar night after night, drink lots of beer and liquor and eat wings and fries and burgers constantly, there is a very SMALL chance you will come out looking like Neil Patrick Harris and getting laid constantly? True story!

/just finished HIMYM season 2
//nobody's lives are that cool
///turns out TV is fantasy. And so are your friends facebook pages.


I don't know about you, but all my female friends look like Robin and Lily, and they're constantly falling into bed with me. (Please don't tell my wife... Morgan Fairchild!)
 
2013-02-10 02:33:48 PM
if someone is getting depressed over a friend having it "better" than them, they need their head checked ASAP. Seriously.

Besides, it might "appear" as though their life is "better" but you never know the real story.

Grow a pair, pussies!
 
2013-02-10 02:34:11 PM
I disagree with that , I use it to feel better about myself with all the posts of "I wish I could disappear from the world" "I feel like a failure" "Why do these things always happen to me" . My life looks awsome.
 
2013-02-10 02:35:01 PM
Not me. I wouldn't have their crappy lives. And if I did, I wouldn't sit around whining about it on Facebook.
 
2013-02-10 02:36:41 PM

Raider_dad: I disagree with that , I use it to feel better about myself with all the posts of "I wish I could disappear from the world" "I feel like a failure" "Why do these things always happen to me" . My life looks awsome.


I hate that crap too, I used to defriend those people but now you can at least just set them to ignore.  Sure it made the following mothers day a little awkward but I tell you my facebook feed is so much nicer to read.
 
2013-02-10 02:37:40 PM
Hmm. I live in Santa Monica and regularly to go events of national interest, like watching the Space Shuttle drive through the street, and seeing A-list celebrities.

My "friends" haven't moved out of suburban Pittsburgh and have all kinds of kids and mediocre jobs.

I guess I don't see what the problem is.
 
2013-02-10 02:37:44 PM
and to get over it I come beat up some nerds at Fark
 
2013-02-10 02:40:04 PM

BlackFoltz: On the contrary, my FB friends make me feel better about myself. It's like watching Hoarders and realizing my house isn't all that messy after all.


Amen.  And it's also good for figuring out who cannot be trusted.  Come to work, whining about your pitiful paycheck, mooching meals off others, then posting about your new tablet, phone, car, etc.  Pathetic.
 
2013-02-10 02:41:13 PM

stiletto_the_wise: How about just not using Facebook if it makes you sad?


So goes the old expression "If it hurts, stop doing it."

Though, I do always get a kick out of people who never miss a chance to post about how they deleted or never had a Facebook account. You all are so farking cool that you might get mistaken for Dos Equis Guy, Jr., a.k.a. the most interesting offspring in the world.
 
2013-02-10 02:42:08 PM
Facebook makes me depressed looking at what's happened to all my friends. I look at them and think, "This wasn't what your life was suppose to be. You weren't suppose to end up like this. You were suppose to go to college and become an engineer. Instead you didn't go to college and got knocked up at 19 by some guy 15 years older than you. Now you're trying to start a catering business. What the fark happened?" That's the story for like 75% of my high school friends. So much lost potential. Maybe I was just too optimistic.
 
2013-02-10 02:43:52 PM

Mawson of the Antarctic: I thought I read somewhere that the only way you can be depressed with Facebook is when you don't realize people are posting their "greatest hits" of their lives. They'll talk about the good things that happened to them and play down the bad unless there's a way to get something good out of sympathy. "Fishing for Complements" is what I call it.


It's kind of like when people tell you how they "won big" at the casino last night. You never ever hear about when they lose (which is most of the time).
 
2013-02-10 02:44:39 PM

Huck And Molly Ziegler: I am amazed by the number of otherwise intelligent people I know who have been sucked into the Facebook phenom.
First of all, if you want to publicize yourself on the Web, pay honest money for a decent website.
Secondly, why would you want to publicize yourself on the Web, unless "you" are a business or legitimate nonprofit?


I do miss the days when myself and my 'nerdy' friends had our stupid individual 'websites'.  Not as clumsy or random as a Facebook Timeline.....an elegant means of communication, for a simpler time.
 
2013-02-10 02:46:43 PM
I realized during my childhood that if you feel as bad as it is possible to feel about yourself at all times, no one can make you feel any worse. It makes you immune to insults. It's similar to the way the Russians would burn their own cities as they retreated from advancing enemies.
 
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