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(Chaos Computer Club)   The French government has announced a plan to try and "educate" wolves to "not eat sheep"   (thelocal.fr) divider line 59
    More: Strange, French government, Don't Bother, Parisians, wolf attacks, Pyrenees  
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2268 clicks; posted to Main » on 08 Feb 2013 at 10:09 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-02-08 09:24:13 AM
"Morning, Ralph."

"Morning, Sam."
 
2013-02-08 09:52:36 AM
You could I suppose convince them there is easier game out there, but when you get a hungry wolf, sheep look remarkably like dinner no matter how much you train them.
 
2013-02-08 10:06:24 AM
When are they going to educate the shepherds not to screw the sheep?
 
2013-02-08 10:09:45 AM
If they are French wolves, won't they just surrender anyway?
 
2013-02-08 10:10:22 AM

lack of warmth: When are they going to educate the shepherds not to screw the sheep?


Maybe if the sheep didn't dress like hoors, there wouldn't be a problem!
 
2013-02-08 10:11:20 AM
Here in America we educate them with a rifle.
 
2013-02-08 10:11:56 AM
pool.theinfosphere.org
Well, if they can teach a lion to eat tofu . . .
 
2013-02-08 10:12:03 AM
Is the plan to make sheep taste like English food.
 
2013-02-08 10:13:23 AM
We taught a lion to eat tofu, man.
roleplayerslament.files.wordpress.com
 
2013-02-08 10:13:44 AM
Damon, I figured that headline had to be some sort of a metaphor. It seems like sheep would be lousy prey for a wolf anyway. Doesn't the wool get stuck in their teeth?
 
2013-02-08 10:14:00 AM
Damn! And not that close either.
 
2013-02-08 10:15:15 AM
www.mchumor.com
 
2013-02-08 10:15:35 AM
i.imgur.com
 
2013-02-08 10:16:21 AM

Nurglitch: lack of warmth: When are they going to educate the shepherds not to screw the sheep?

Maybe if the sheep didn't dress like hoors, there wouldn't be a problem!


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HNMq8XS4LhE

I know.
 
2013-02-08 10:17:03 AM

jspenguin: "Morning, Ralph."

"Morning, Sam."


i.imgur.com
 
2013-02-08 10:19:11 AM

abfalter: Here in America we educate them with a rifle.


From a helicopter. Truly a manly thing to do.
 
2013-02-08 10:19:39 AM
Easier for them to teach the sheep not to be made out of tasty tasty meat.
 
2013-02-08 10:31:35 AM

jspenguin: "Morning, Ralph."

"Morning, Sam."


Thanks for the laugh, I loved that cartoon. Kids today have no idea what quality cartoons are.

/I sound old
 
2013-02-08 10:34:11 AM
I'm confused. Does this mean France surrendered to the wolves or to the sheep?
 
2013-02-08 10:35:36 AM
 For some reason when I read the headline I was thinking of a wolf stapped up all Clockwork Orange style.

Hypnozombie
 
2013-02-08 10:37:52 AM
Does this involve a rolled up newspaper in any way?
 
das
2013-02-08 10:38:02 AM
Done in one!!!
 
2013-02-08 10:39:22 AM

FullMetalPanda: If they are French wolves, won't they just surrender anyway?


Sure, but then they'll organize an underground resistance movement. You think they're stealthy now...
 
2013-02-08 10:39:38 AM
sphotos-a.xx.fbcdn.net


After her bath Sugar would be glad to take care of any wolf or coyote problems you might have.
 
2013-02-08 10:41:08 AM
There are 250 wolves in all of France?   An area slightly smaller than Texas?

Sorry, I'm not seeing the problem.  This is like complaining about meteor strikes killing sheep instead of other, more common causes of death.
 
2013-02-08 10:44:39 AM
Teach wolves not to eat sheep>

Well, it's probably a helluva lot easier than teaching greedy politicians not to accept bribes from lobbyists.

Those pols just love that easy money from Monsanto, RIAA, MPAA, Oil Industry, Defense industry, pretty much any industry that pollutes...
 
2013-02-08 10:45:41 AM
FTFA: [...]  it entails capturing individual wolves that are known to attack a local flock and then marking these bothersome predators before letting them go.

The theory is that the animal will be so traumatised by the experience that it will leave the sheep alone and instead hunt for deer, boar, rabbits and other wild animals.

 Really?  This is supposed to work?  More like, "Wow, I get captured when I go after sheep.  Maybe I should be more careful/watch out for the French government vans...."
 
2013-02-08 10:47:38 AM

flynn80: Is the plan to make sheep taste like English food.


/the truth is stranger than fiction dept.
/CSB sorta

about 35 years ago i had a college professor that was trying a scheme where the sheep had collars ( i think) laced with potassium chloride which was supposed to make the wolf regurgitate violently after eating the sheep, the thought being that after loosing their lunches enough times they would stop attacking the sheep. I left before the study was finished but don't think the plan was successful.

/end CSB
 
2013-02-08 10:50:02 AM
Why not just issue the shepherds "wolf insurance"?  For most of the year, if the last documentary I watched was to be believed, Wolves sustain themselves on a diet of mice and other very, very small game...
Of course, these were Alaskan wolves, who picked off weaker caribou every time the herds migrated through.  I have no idea what the 250 french wolves eat most of the year.
/probably not snails.
//even wolves have their standards.
 
2013-02-08 10:50:18 AM

lecas: about 35 years ago i had a college professor that was trying a scheme where the sheep had collars ( i think) laced with potassium chloride which was supposed to make the wolf regurgitate violently after eating the sheep [...]


Wolf1: Any suggestions on these sheep?
Wolf2: Oh, leave the collars alone, they taste like crap.  Rest of the sheep's real tasty, though!
 
2013-02-08 10:50:40 AM

jspenguin: "Morning, Ralph."

"Morning, Sam."


I have not witnessed win such as this in a very long time.

It burns!

/right in the boobies
 
2013-02-08 10:59:46 AM
Isn't that what they tried to do with Hitler?
 
2013-02-08 11:00:30 AM
We already did that, we call them dogs.
 
2013-02-08 11:01:53 AM
And the boobies wins. Well done.

I want transcripts of all the meetings while they're doing this.

darth_badger: [sphotos-a.xx.fbcdn.net image 600x450]


After her bath Sugar would be glad to take care of any wolf or coyote problems you might have.


That's a big-ass lawn-ornament. I don't like anything bigger than a gnome, really.
 
2013-02-08 11:07:23 AM
I suggest the old bait & switch...

4.bp.blogspot.com
 
2013-02-08 11:11:06 AM
Is this a new political science class or something...?
 
2013-02-08 11:11:28 AM

grokca: We already did that, we call them dogs.


Yep. That was totally successful.

/Wolves are preferable, frankly.
 
2013-02-08 11:14:48 AM
I don't understand why most humans think the way they do.  When you move in on a predator's natural habitat and engage in practices that either kills or runs off its natural prey, what do you expect it to do?
 
2013-02-08 11:21:52 AM

Fool_Marquis: For most of the year, if the last documentary I watched was to be believed, Wolves sustain themselves on a diet of mice and other very, very small game...


Pretty much this.  Because small game is much more plentiful and frankly,  a lot less work.  The life expectancy of a bunny is 5 weeks.  Hopping lunches, they are.
 
2013-02-08 11:26:59 AM
Well that should work about as well as the Maginot Line.

WordsnCollision: I suggest the old bait & switch...

[4.bp.blogspot.com image 634x423]


Why? Are the wolves muslims?
 
2013-02-08 11:42:32 AM
We could try that in America, but I think they'd still vote democrat.
 
2013-02-08 11:54:17 AM

Fool_Marquis: Why not just issue the shepherds "wolf insurance"?  For most of the year, if the last documentary I watched was to be believed, Wolves sustain themselves on a diet of mice and other very, very small game...
Of course, these were Alaskan wolves, who picked off weaker caribou every time the herds migrated through.  I have no idea what the 250 french wolves eat most of the year.
/probably not snails.
//even wolves have their standards.


Because that would make too much sense.
 
2013-02-08 11:59:11 AM
Next step - teaching the sheep to fly! But think of the possibilities of ovine aviation!
'arold, that most dangerous of animals, a clever sheep - not available for comment.
 
2013-02-08 12:00:49 PM
Yes, that's right.  Teach them not to eat sheep.  Then they'll just go after your kids.  Sounds like a great plan.
 
2013-02-08 12:10:19 PM
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHA

srsly, they named the dog  Great Pyrenees for some reason
you'd think that french folks would have heard of 'em
 
2013-02-08 12:14:22 PM
Guard Ligers are clearly the solution
 
2013-02-08 12:19:40 PM

Cloudchaser Sakonige the Red Wolf: I don't understand why most humans think the way they do.  When you move in on a predator's natural habitat and engage in practices that either kills or runs off its natural prey, what do you expect it to do?


Surrender. Just like the French.
 
2013-02-08 12:40:24 PM

NutWrench: [pool.theinfosphere.org image 225x150]
Well, if they can teach a lion to eat tofu . . .


I think we're done here.
 
2013-02-08 12:45:42 PM
Sounds like a plot of a Warner Brother cartoon.
 
2013-02-08 12:50:27 PM
Maybe they could hire a few of these.

/Kangal dogs are awesome
//I got to meet one at the Indianapolis Zoo.  They're used in the cheetah conservation effort 'cause they scare the cheetahs away from livestock so the ranchers are less likely to resort to deadly force.
 
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