FARK.com: (7581834) The French government has announced a plan to try and "educate" wolves to "not eat sheep"

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		The French government has announced a plan to try and "educate" wolves to "not eat sheep" (thelocal.fr)		59
		More: Strange, French government, Don't Bother, Parisians, wolf attacks, Pyrenees

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2224 clicks; posted to Main » on 08 Feb 2013 at 10:09 AM | Favorite | share:

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jspenguin		2013-02-08 09:24:13 AM

"Morning, Ralph."

"Morning, Sam."

EvilEgg		2013-02-08 09:52:36 AM

You could I suppose convince them there is easier game out there, but when you get a hungry wolf, sheep look remarkably like dinner no matter how much you train them.

lack of warmth		2013-02-08 10:06:24 AM

When are they going to educate the shepherds not to screw the sheep?

FullMetalPanda		2013-02-08 10:09:45 AM

If they are French wolves, won't they just surrender anyway?

Nurglitch		2013-02-08 10:10:22 AM

lack of warmth: When are they going to educate the shepherds not to screw the sheep?

Maybe if the sheep didn't dress like hoors, there wouldn't be a problem!

abfalter		2013-02-08 10:11:20 AM

Here in America we educate them with a rifle.

NutWrench		2013-02-08 10:11:56 AM

Well, if they can teach a lion to eat tofu . . .

flynn80		2013-02-08 10:12:03 AM

Is the plan to make sheep taste like English food.

Wellon Dowd		2013-02-08 10:13:23 AM

We taught a lion to eat tofu, man.
roleplayerslament.files.wordpress.com

Yes please		2013-02-08 10:13:44 AM

Damon, I figured that headline had to be some sort of a metaphor. It seems like sheep would be lousy prey for a wolf anyway. Doesn't the wool get stuck in their teeth?

Wellon Dowd		2013-02-08 10:14:00 AM

Damn! And not that close either.

eyeq360		2013-02-08 10:15:15 AM

theurge14		2013-02-08 10:15:35 AM

EvilEgg		2013-02-08 10:16:21 AM

Nurglitch: lack of warmth: When are they going to educate the shepherds not to screw the sheep?

Maybe if the sheep didn't dress like hoors, there wouldn't be a problem!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HNMq8XS4LhE

I know.

A Shambling Mound		2013-02-08 10:17:03 AM

jspenguin: "Morning, Ralph."

"Morning, Sam."

i.imgur.com

2wolves		2013-02-08 10:19:11 AM

abfalter: Here in America we educate them with a rifle.

From a helicopter. Truly a manly thing to do.

Mayhem of the Black Underclass		2013-02-08 10:19:39 AM

Easier for them to teach the sheep not to be made out of tasty tasty meat.

LovingTeacher		2013-02-08 10:31:35 AM

jspenguin: "Morning, Ralph."

"Morning, Sam."

Thanks for the laugh, I loved that cartoon. Kids today have no idea what quality cartoons are.

/I sound old

turboke		2013-02-08 10:34:11 AM

I'm confused. Does this mean France surrendered to the wolves or to the sheep?

HypnozombieX		2013-02-08 10:35:36 AM

For some reason when I read the headline I was thinking of a wolf stapped up all Clockwork Orange style.

Hypnozombie

Oliver Twisted		2013-02-08 10:37:52 AM

Does this involve a rolled up newspaper in any way?

das		2013-02-08 10:38:02 AM

Done in one!!!

Canton		2013-02-08 10:39:22 AM

FullMetalPanda: If they are French wolves, won't they just surrender anyway?

Sure, but then they'll organize an underground resistance movement. You think they're stealthy now...

darth_badger		2013-02-08 10:39:38 AM

After her bath Sugar would be glad to take care of any wolf or coyote problems you might have.

bubo_sibiricus		2013-02-08 10:41:08 AM

There are 250 wolves in all of France? An area slightly smaller than Texas?

Sorry, I'm not seeing the problem. This is like complaining about meteor strikes killing sheep instead of other, more common causes of death.

Day_Old_Dutchie		2013-02-08 10:44:39 AM

Teach wolves not to eat sheep>

Well, it's probably a helluva lot easier than teaching greedy politicians not to accept bribes from lobbyists.

Those pols just love that easy money from Monsanto, RIAA, MPAA, Oil Industry, Defense industry, pretty much any industry that pollutes...

stevarooni		2013-02-08 10:45:41 AM

FTFA: [...] it entails capturing individual wolves that are known to attack a local flock and then marking these bothersome predators before letting them go.

The theory is that the animal will be so traumatised by the experience that it will leave the sheep alone and instead hunt for deer, boar, rabbits and other wild animals.
Really? This is supposed to work? More like, "Wow, I get captured when I go after sheep. Maybe I should be more careful/watch out for the French government vans...."

lecas		2013-02-08 10:47:38 AM

flynn80: Is the plan to make sheep taste like English food.

/the truth is stranger than fiction dept.
/CSB sorta

about 35 years ago i had a college professor that was trying a scheme where the sheep had collars ( i think) laced with potassium chloride which was supposed to make the wolf regurgitate violently after eating the sheep, the thought being that after loosing their lunches enough times they would stop attacking the sheep. I left before the study was finished but don't think the plan was successful.

/end CSB

Fool_Marquis		2013-02-08 10:50:02 AM

Why not just issue the shepherds "wolf insurance"? For most of the year, if the last documentary I watched was to be believed, Wolves sustain themselves on a diet of mice and other very, very small game...
Of course, these were Alaskan wolves, who picked off weaker caribou every time the herds migrated through. I have no idea what the 250 french wolves eat most of the year.
/probably not snails.
//even wolves have their standards.

stevarooni		2013-02-08 10:50:18 AM

lecas: about 35 years ago i had a college professor that was trying a scheme where the sheep had collars ( i think) laced with potassium chloride which was supposed to make the wolf regurgitate violently after eating the sheep [...]

Wolf1: Any suggestions on these sheep?
Wolf2: Oh, leave the collars alone, they taste like crap. Rest of the sheep's real tasty, though!

TheMysticS		2013-02-08 10:50:40 AM

jspenguin: "Morning, Ralph."

"Morning, Sam."

I have not witnessed win such as this in a very long time.

It burns!

/right in the boobies

Lerxst2k		2013-02-08 10:59:46 AM

Isn't that what they tried to do with Hitler?

grokca		2013-02-08 11:00:30 AM

We already did that, we call them dogs.

ecmoRandomNumbers		2013-02-08 11:01:53 AM

And the boobies wins. Well done.

I want transcripts of all the meetings while they're doing this.darth_badger: [sphotos-a.xx.fbcdn.net image 600x450]

After her bath Sugar would be glad to take care of any wolf or coyote problems you might have.

That's a big-ass lawn-ornament. I don't like anything bigger than a gnome, really.

WordsnCollision		2013-02-08 11:07:23 AM

I suggest the old bait & switch...

4.bp.blogspot.com

Elroydb		2013-02-08 11:11:06 AM

Is this a new political science class or something...?

Canton		2013-02-08 11:11:28 AM

grokca: We already did that, we call them dogs.

Yep. That was totally successful.

/Wolves are preferable, frankly.

Cloudchaser Sakonige the Red Wolf		2013-02-08 11:14:48 AM

I don't understand why most humans think the way they do. When you move in on a predator's natural habitat and engage in practices that either kills or runs off its natural prey, what do you expect it to do?

bubo_sibiricus		2013-02-08 11:21:52 AM

Fool_Marquis: For most of the year, if the last documentary I watched was to be believed, Wolves sustain themselves on a diet of mice and other very, very small game...

Pretty much this. Because small game is much more plentiful and frankly, a lot less work. The life expectancy of a bunny is 5 weeks. Hopping lunches, they are.

Agent Smiths Laugh		2013-02-08 11:26:59 AM

Well that should work about as well as the Maginot Line.

WordsnCollision: I suggest the old bait & switch...

[4.bp.blogspot.com image 634x423]

Why? Are the wolves muslims?

meta1hed		2013-02-08 11:42:32 AM

We could try that in America, but I think they'd still vote democrat.

Oldiron_79		2013-02-08 11:54:17 AM

Fool_Marquis: Why not just issue the shepherds "wolf insurance"? For most of the year, if the last documentary I watched was to be believed, Wolves sustain themselves on a diet of mice and other very, very small game...
Of course, these were Alaskan wolves, who picked off weaker caribou every time the herds migrated through. I have no idea what the 250 french wolves eat most of the year.
/probably not snails.
//even wolves have their standards.

Because that would make too much sense.

DupeOfURL		2013-02-08 11:59:11 AM

Next step - teaching the sheep to fly! But think of the possibilities of ovine aviation!
'arold, that most dangerous of animals, a clever sheep - not available for comment.

FatherChaos		2013-02-08 12:00:49 PM

Yes, that's right. Teach them not to eat sheep. Then they'll just go after your kids. Sounds like a great plan.

IAMTHEINTARWEBS		2013-02-08 12:10:19 PM

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHAHAHAHAHA

srsly, they named the dog Great Pyrenees for some reason
you'd think that french folks would have heard of 'em

Oldiron_79		2013-02-08 12:14:22 PM

Guard Ligers are clearly the solution

offmymeds		2013-02-08 12:19:40 PM

Cloudchaser Sakonige the Red Wolf: I don't understand why most humans think the way they do. When you move in on a predator's natural habitat and engage in practices that either kills or runs off its natural prey, what do you expect it to do?

Surrender. Just like the French.

TanSau		2013-02-08 12:40:24 PM

NutWrench: [pool.theinfosphere.org image 225x150]
Well, if they can teach a lion to eat tofu . . .

I think we're done here.

gerrychampoux		2013-02-08 12:45:42 PM

Sounds like a plot of a Warner Brother cartoon.

Strix occidentalis		2013-02-08 12:50:27 PM

Maybe they could hire a few of these.

/Kangal dogs are awesome
//I got to meet one at the Indianapolis Zoo. They're used in the cheetah conservation effort 'cause they scare the cheetahs away from livestock so the ranchers are less likely to resort to deadly force.

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