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(Hampton Roads)   Virginia wants to make "dooring" bicyclists illegal. Subby has always heard it referred as "door-checking"   (hamptonroads.com) divider line 32
    More: Obvious, civil penalty, judicial panel, car doors  
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10046 clicks; posted to Main » on 08 Feb 2013 at 6:30 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



Voting Results (Funniest)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


Archived thread
2013-02-08 12:34:47 AM  
14 votes:
A violation would carry a $100 civil penalty.

Worth it.
2013-02-08 06:40:34 AM  
9 votes:
Seems like a lot of trouble to carry a whole door around just for smacking cyclists.
2013-02-08 06:38:49 AM  
6 votes:

MmmmBacon: In Portlandia, you do that to a Cyclist, the rest of their pack will have you strung up from the nearest Starbucks sign in minutes.


My adventures with Portlandia bikers, summed:

"Cars suck!"
"Yeah, cars suck! They should be outlawed!"
"Bikers rule"
"Yeah! Cars suck! Air-polluting energy wasters for lazy bastards!"

"Um, By the way, I'm moving next week. Does anyone have a truck I can borrow?"
"Yeah, and, uh, I need some help getting groceries and a few things from the hardware store. Can somebody give me a ride?"
2013-02-08 07:01:23 AM  
5 votes:

natas6.0: Working for over a decade in 'frisco
I've learned that cyclists who act like arseholes usually get it in the end
or rather
 dragged by a car, crushed against walls/other vehicles etc
or in one glorious case I worked..hit by a cement truck
driver swears he never saw the idiot playing chicken with him

Hard to keep a straight face with the crying friends and family in their cycling tights
on a good note, the company successfully sued for the loss and cleaning
 of a truck full of cement
so all ended well



Worst.  Poem.  Ever.
2013-02-08 06:37:24 AM  
5 votes:
When I was a cycle courier, it was called "the door prize".

CSB: Saw someone opening a door without a mirror check, right in front of me, and instead of veering out into traffic, I veered into their exiting left leg.

It sounds like celery being snapped inside a towel. The bone, not the screaming.

/CSB.
//I clip the occasional texting jaywalker, too. People think evolution is passive. It's not.
2013-02-08 07:20:33 AM  
4 votes:

Wolf892: ninja parades that no one sees


cassandraparkin.files.wordpress.com
2013-02-08 06:37:20 AM  
3 votes:

djones101: They should give out $100 bonuses for every pretentious bicycling hipster snob that gets door'd.  Sorry, but you do NOT own the lane and the entire road around it.


Hey, hey, everyone!  This guy is EDGY /and/ COOL.  Acknowledge him!
2013-02-08 06:34:42 AM  
3 votes:

MmmmBacon: In Portlandia, you do that to a Cyclist, the rest of their pack will have you strung up from the nearest Starbucks sign in minutes.


I was engaging in angry mob justice before it was cool.
2013-02-08 07:17:17 AM  
2 votes:
People take riding a bike and driving way too seriously. Do you know what's best? Walk. Bike riders, you get just as many health benefits from walking...drivers, if you are going to the store at the end of your street, walk there....
Free up the road for the ninja parades that no one sees passing through.
2013-02-08 06:51:32 AM  
2 votes:
I saw a bicyclist get doored once. It was hilarious.

I laughed even harder as the ambulance carried away his corpse.
2013-02-08 06:48:37 AM  
2 votes:
However, bicyclists will now be arrested and given transvaginal ultrasounds as a matter of routine.
2013-02-08 06:41:10 AM  
2 votes:

djones101: They should give out $100 bonuses for every pretentious bicycling hipster snob that gets door'd.  Sorry, but you do NOT own the lane and the entire road around it.


Valiente: When I was a cycle courier, it was called "the door prize".

CSB: Saw someone opening a door without a mirror check, right in front of me, and instead of veering out into traffic, I veered into their exiting left leg.

It sounds like celery being snapped inside a towel. The bone, not the screaming.

/CSB.
//I clip the occasional texting jaywalker, too. People think evolution is passive. It's not.


You two were made for each other.
2013-02-08 06:34:33 AM  
2 votes:
They should give out $100 bonuses for every pretentious bicycling hipster snob that gets door'd.  Sorry, but you do NOT own the lane and the entire road around it.
2013-02-08 03:22:06 AM  
2 votes:
In Portlandia, you do that to a Cyclist, the rest of their pack will have you strung up from the nearest Starbucks sign in minutes.
2013-02-08 02:29:00 AM  
2 votes:

EatenTheSun: A violation would carry a $100 civil penalty.

Worth it.


Seriously. I would have never considered doing this as I thought it would result in criminal charges... but $100 fine? That makes it tempting.
2013-02-08 08:56:25 AM  
1 votes:

HotIgneous Intruder: However, bicyclists will now be arrested and given transvaginal ultrasounds as a matter of routine.


and we're done here.
2013-02-08 08:53:31 AM  
1 votes:

Norad: Yay. Another 'dick cyclist/motorist' thread.


We need to get them all one the same road at the same time, let the first responders get some practice cleaning up the bodies and get on with our lives.
2013-02-08 08:32:23 AM  
1 votes:

djones101: They should give out $100 bonuses for every pretentious bicycling hipster snob that gets door'd.  Sorry, but you do NOT own the lane and the entire road around it.


Wow that was Alpha. I bet you just REEK of Axe.
2013-02-08 08:29:20 AM  
1 votes:
CSB Time:

Was getting out of a taxi in DC one day and, I guess, some biker had decided that he REALLY needed to go around between the sidewalk and the cab.

Opened the door right into his front tire, dude went flying face first into the bumper of the car parked by the cab.

Looked like it hurt like hell
2013-02-08 08:19:37 AM  
1 votes:

MythDragon: IAMTHEINTARWEBS: I love riding my bike. Most fun I have had getting some exercise aside from martial arts class or sex butt guys

You get exercise from sex butt guys?

Is that in martial arts class, or does that happen later?


OH man. Never post before caffiene. There's my little PSA for you all.

I did make me LOL though
so I got that going for me
2013-02-08 08:09:44 AM  
1 votes:
Valiente:  I consider my fellow humans incapable of logic or impulse control.

Says the person who's first impulse is to try and break someone's leg when they could have avoided them or 'clips' people for not paying attention to them.

~rolls eyes~
2013-02-08 07:50:19 AM  
1 votes:

Valiente: When I was a cycle courier, it was called "the door prize".

CSB: Saw someone opening a door without a mirror check, right in front of me, and instead of veering out into traffic, I veered into their exiting left leg.

It sounds like celery being snapped inside a towel. The bone, not the screaming.

/CSB.
//I clip the occasional texting jaywalker, too. People think evolution is passive. It's not.


I would love to run you over with my suv......then back up over you.
2013-02-08 07:47:02 AM  
1 votes:

LDM90: They should somehow work tipping into these bicyclist threads. The comments would be in the 1000s!


Do you tip your courier that delivered by bike? Obviously he could use extra cash to afford a car.
db2
2013-02-08 07:24:43 AM  
1 votes:
What about front-bumpering? Still okay?
2013-02-08 07:13:05 AM  
1 votes:

Valiente: When I was a cycle courier, it was called "the door prize".

CSB: Saw someone opening a door without a mirror check, right in front of me, and instead of veering out into traffic, I veered into their exiting left leg.

It sounds like celery being snapped inside a towel. The bone, not the screaming.

/CSB.
//I clip the occasional texting jaywalker, too. People think evolution is passive. It's not.



Valiente: Dick cyclists annoy me as well as any driver


Do you even have any self-awareness?
2013-02-08 07:05:42 AM  
1 votes:

LDM90: They should somehow work tipping into these bicyclist threads. The comments would be in the 1000s!


Never happen, you have to be clean to work in a restaurant.
2013-02-08 06:59:58 AM  
1 votes:
farm1.static.flickr.com

/ what a REAL doorcheck looks like
// tips hat to TACPs & FACs
2013-02-08 06:56:05 AM  
1 votes:
Working for over a decade in 'frisco
I've learned that cyclists who act like arseholes usually get it in the end
or rather
 dragged by a car, crushed against walls/other vehicles etc
or in one glorious case I worked..hit by a cement truck
driver swears he never saw the idiot playing chicken with him

Hard to keep a straight face with the crying friends and family in their cycling tights
on a good note, the company successfully sued for the loss and cleaning
 of a truck full of cement
so all ended well
2013-02-08 06:54:53 AM  
1 votes:
Got doored about 5 years ago. Would have been okay, but unfortunately there was a car behind me that drove over me when I was on the ground.
/painful story, bro
2013-02-08 06:39:47 AM  
1 votes:
but what's the fine for damaging my poor car door?
2013-02-08 06:38:00 AM  
1 votes:

Vodka Zombie: I've always heard it referred to as assault or assault with a deadly weapon.


Really? I always heard that you should be careful when riding your bicycle and follow the rules of the road.
2013-02-08 01:47:49 AM  
1 votes:
mojoimage.com


"What's happening, Luther?"


/not a bicycle, but still funny
 
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