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(Today)   Not being invited to a wedding is now a thing   (thelook.today.com) divider line 35
    More: Fail, Emily Post, market trends  
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15596 clicks; posted to Main » on 08 Feb 2013 at 12:15 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



Voting Results (Smartest)
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Archived thread
2013-02-07 11:49:18 PM
7 votes:
What ever happened to saying "we can't afford a big fancy reception, so let's all meet up at some restaurant/bar and party?"
2013-02-08 12:20:08 AM
6 votes:

WordyGrrl: What ever happened to saying "we can't afford a big fancy reception, so let's all meet up at some restaurant/bar and party?"


Yeah, came here to post "Have a ceremony that's within your means and you can invite everyone whom it's appropriate to invite.".
2013-02-08 12:36:46 AM
4 votes:
How is it even possible, with multiple 24/7 news channels screaming "YOU'RE ALL GOING TO DIE" every 10 seconds, with a global information computer network seemingly dedicated to finding and discovering things in our life that are wrong, with 7 billion and counting obsessing over everything from global warming to school shootings to missing honeybees....with all this, we are STILL making up fake problems for ourselves.

It's terrible of me to say, but we need a supervillain or a threat of an asteroid strike or a lava men uprising or something. Just to globally pull back the reigns a bit on stupid shiat.
2013-02-08 12:24:28 AM
4 votes:
I can't imagine being angry not to be invited to someone's wedding, especially if it's not in the city where I live. We spent a lot of money we couldn't really spare to go to a destination wedding last year- and I would have really preferred to save the money and stay home.
2013-02-08 12:50:37 AM
3 votes:
"social media serving as wedding announcements on steroids"

How 'bout you don't post time, date, and location on Facebook if you don't want a bunch of your "friends" to show up for the wedding?
2013-02-08 12:27:10 AM
3 votes:

Isildur: WordyGrrl: What ever happened to saying "we can't afford a big fancy reception, so let's all meet up at some restaurant/bar and party?"

Yeah, came here to post "Have a ceremony that's within your means and you can invite everyone whom it's appropriate to invite.".


Didn't people always used to tell friends and acquaintances they were getting married and only inviting family "and close friends"? The proper response was not to be insulted when that wasn't you.....or is that the new problem? Everyone now assumes that since Joanne has 793 friends on Facebook, when she announces her engagement, THEY are automatically one of her "close friends" and when they don't get an invite, they become mortally insulted?

Chalk up another issue on the "unintended consequences of social media" toteboard, I guess.
2013-02-08 01:09:19 AM
2 votes:

la_cyberchicana: The "non-invites" are just cash and swag grabs aimed at folks who as non-invitees are under no obligation to send a gift.


Invitees are also under no obligation to send a gift.  I hate that people think that they should invite people for that reason.  The whole "cover your plate" thing is BS.  You invite people because you want them to be there, not to get a set of flatware.
2013-02-08 01:00:10 AM
2 votes:

Abox: I wish every wedding invite I ever got and ever will get was a not-invite.


But it is free food, free booze and free access to the girl/boy of your fancy that can't handle their booze, plus you get to dance to all those tunes you secretly sing to when nobody else is looking......all without consequence. All you have to do to gain entry is buy a toaster or some other piece of shiat the happy couple will pawn off in their divorce years ( if it makes the cut and isn't re-gifted). I say invite me to all the weddings you want, as long as there is an open bar.
2013-02-08 12:54:56 AM
2 votes:
This is breathtakingly rude. People know they're not invited when they don't get an invitation. And it's equally rude to ask if you're invited. But I wonder if some people are getting questions from people asking about their invitations or assuming they're invited and don't have the guts to tell them personally that they're not on the list.

There's a problem that crops up frequently. The couple sends an invitation addressed to two people. The reply card comes back with 4 people attending. It's usually people who can't comprehend that their children aren't invited (and often refuse to attend unless the kids are invited).

When I was wedding planning and going on planning message boards, I found that a lot of people are doing things backward. They pick a reception venue, then they realize they can't invite many people either because the place is too small or it's too expensive.

I have professional event planning and experience and people have asked me for wedding planning advice. Then they tell me I'm wrong or they ignore what I tell them. It's why I won't do wedding planning. It's impossible to get some people to understand budgeting. I tell them it needs to be their first step: determine the total amount of money you have to spend. And they something like "I can't do that until I know how much things cost." Or "well, how much will it cost?" It can cost any amount you like. "No, how much does a regular wedding cost?" And then I strangle her.
2013-02-08 12:43:30 AM
2 votes:
I don't give a fark if I'm invited to most people's weddings, and I have the common sense to know that not receiving an invitation means I'm not invited, but I would show up out of spite if someone explicitly informed me that I was not invited.
2013-02-08 12:41:04 AM
2 votes:
So 12yo girls are wedding planners now?
2013-02-08 12:33:49 AM
2 votes:
Yay! My disdain for a large segment of the human race is justified once again.
2013-02-08 12:20:35 AM
2 votes:
I would be happy as hell to receive these. People invite me all the time and I have to find a way out without pissing them off. But when they divorce I start seeing them again and say "I told you so"
2013-02-08 09:40:05 AM
1 votes:
One New Jersey bride informed second-tier friends they were on the wait list, and sure enough, when there were openings, they gladly accepted the full invite - but not without some blowback. "There was some resentment," said the bride, who preferred to go unnamed. "One still refers to himself as a 'B-list' friend."

That is completely and utterly insulting.  I have no problem with not being invited....it's their day not mine so I wouldn't get all butt-hurt about it.  But to call up people and say they are on the waiting list?  That's farked up.
2013-02-08 06:08:26 AM
1 votes:
I refuse to attend weddings. I am opposed to the wedding-industrial complex. Mrs. PCoC is lucky I attended our wedding (in fairness it consisted of us, our parents, her sister, a public officiant, and a nice dinner for all afterward). I would be overjoyed to receive one of these. Actually, if there's a way I could get some kind of blanket immunity from ever being invited to weddings, that would be great.
2013-02-08 03:26:07 AM
1 votes:
courthouse marriage for me. it was fun - the vows were administered by a woman whose first language was not english so we were asked "have you ever been married in a previous life?" my wedding gift from the county was a bag which included a small box of laundry detergent and diaper coupons.

several weeks later we had an open house/reception and invited all our new neighbors - didn't get many gifts but made some long-term new friends

25 years and counting - and telling my mother on a friday i was getting married on monday still makes me smile

big weddings? pass
2013-02-08 03:25:02 AM
1 votes:
I would send a thank you note if i got one of these un-invitations.

But the whole practice of it is conceited and presumptuous. It is as if everybody feels that everybody else is dying to go to their wedding. When in fact, there are many people like me who cannot stand the entire thing.

I would even be satisfied going to the ceremony and not the reception. For me, it is the wedding vows that is the part I want to witness and be happy about, not whether I got some free fish, chicken or beef.
2013-02-08 03:01:48 AM
1 votes:
I wouldn't care if someone didn't invite me, but if someone specifically sent me and uninvitation, I'd be pissed as hell and unfriend them. Which I guess in the day of facebook doesn't mean very much, as I'd have to do that in rl since I don't use facebook, and no one cares what happens in the actual world anymore.

Also the strategies for getting on the guest list thingy confounds me. Who actually likes going to weddings? Aren't they boring as hell, even when people are drunk? I hear things occasionally about getting laid at weddings, but dear god, aren't there better ways to do that? I think of weddings as something I'm obligated to attend and pretend I don't hate to give people their special day, as opposed to something I'm desperately hoping to get invited to.
2013-02-08 01:26:13 AM
1 votes:

Twitch Boy: I would have LOVED to receive one of these so I didn't have to blow two grand and a third of my annual leave flying from Alaska to farking Saginaw for three days.


Man, they must have had some heavy evidence on you.  Embezzlment?  Drugs?  Bestiality?
2013-02-08 01:22:44 AM
1 votes:
I would have LOVED to receive one of these so I didn't have to blow two grand and a third of my annual leave flying from Alaska to farking Saginaw for three days.
2013-02-08 01:15:39 AM
1 votes:

HotWingAgenda: If you don't want someone at your wedding, don't tell them you're getting married.


And how exactly are you supposed to do that?  Make the friends you do want to invite sign a contract saying they won't mention it to the friends who aren't invited?  Block your Facebook status update to certain friends?  Negotiate with the newspaper to "accidentally" not deliver the day's paper to certain friends?  Get the registry websites to block certain IP addresses of the friends you don't want to invite?
2013-02-08 01:05:44 AM
1 votes:

NobleHam: I don't give a fark if I'm invited to most people's weddings, and I have the common sense to know that not receiving an invitation means I'm not invited, but I would show up out of spite if someone explicitly informed me that I was not invited.


Hell, I'd show up with fellow non-invitees in tow.

I got a non-invite last year -- from the sister of the bride, no less. I wasn't particularly close to the bride (she was a former co-worker whom I hadn't heard from in a few years), so I wasn't expecting an invite anyways, and until a mutual friend e-mailed me about the wedding, wasn't even aware she was marrying. And yet, her sister calls me to tell me I'm not invited, "... but if you want to participate in the wedding, you can still send a gift." fark that. The "non-invites" are just cash and swag grabs aimed at folks who as non-invitees are under no obligation to send a gift.
2013-02-08 12:49:59 AM
1 votes:
CSB:
My fiancé got an invite to the wedding of a guy she went to grad school with. Apparently he had a huge thing for her to the point that he wrote her a bunch of shiatty love poems. He sent me the non-vite but included the info for his Amazon registry. My fiance politely declined. I sent his bride something similar to this:
www.trophystore.co.uk
2013-02-08 12:42:53 AM
1 votes:

Watubi: We just threw a BBQ for people who weren't invited to our small wedding.  Helluva lot cheaper and they still were compelled to buy us a gift


Hell, that was our reception.
2013-02-08 12:41:29 AM
1 votes:
We just threw a BBQ for people who weren't invited to our small wedding.  Helluva lot cheaper and they still were compelled to buy us a gift
2013-02-08 12:37:13 AM
1 votes:
This is probably sent by brides who want the full princess treatment and this is a kind way to say 'you don't fit into my definition of princesshood...so kindly go fark off'
2013-02-08 12:36:06 AM
1 votes:
www.bundyology.com
2013-02-08 12:34:04 AM
1 votes:
I wish every wedding invite I ever got and ever will get was a not-invite.
2013-02-08 12:33:58 AM
1 votes:
I was invited a wedding once, back in college.  I farked the bride during the reception and bragged about it.  Nobody ever bothered me with that shiat again.
2013-02-08 12:28:07 AM
1 votes:
You could do it the seinfeld way and get people their invitations the week before the ceremony.  It's an unvitation!
2013-02-08 12:27:20 AM
1 votes:
Weddings and funerals - I've got better things to do.
2013-02-08 12:26:06 AM
1 votes:
It is things like this, coupled with my first wedding experience, that makes me glad Ms Buzzcut v 2.0 wanted a simple affair announced at the last minute to a very few select people.

By few, I mean a couple to sign the witness lines on the certificate.
2013-02-08 12:24:09 AM
1 votes:
OK here's the deal. You throw a party - food, liquor, maybe even entertainment. In return I'll bring a gift, even a gift you've yourself chosen. That's the deal.
2013-02-08 12:18:53 AM
1 votes:
A thing for idiots, yeah.
2013-02-07 11:10:48 PM
1 votes:
The really good ones say, "You're not invited, but if you wish to send a gift..."
 
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