Nobody wants to go to your wedding anyways. Boats and ho's - rent em.

A thing for idiots, yeah.

WordyGrrl: What ever happened to saying "we can't afford a big fancy reception, so let's all meet up at some restaurant/bar and party?"

Yeah, came here to post "Have a ceremony that's within your means and you can invite everyone whom it's appropriate to invite.".

OK here's the deal. You throw a party - food, liquor, maybe even entertainment. In return I'll bring a gift, even a gift you've yourself chosen. That's the deal.

It is things like this, coupled with my first wedding experience, that makes me glad Ms Buzzcut v 2.0 wanted a simple affair announced at the last minute to a very few select people.

By few, I mean a couple to sign the witness lines on the certificate.

Isildur: WordyGrrl: What ever happened to saying "we can't afford a big fancy reception, so let's all meet up at some restaurant/bar and party?"

Yeah, came here to post "Have a ceremony that's within your means and you can invite everyone whom it's appropriate to invite.".

Didn't people always used to tell friends and acquaintances they were getting married and only inviting family "and close friends"? The proper response was not to be insulted when that wasn't you.....or is that the new problem? Everyone now assumes that since Joanne has 793 friends on Facebook, when she announces her engagement, THEY are automatically one of her "close friends" and when they don't get an invite, they become mortally insulted?

Chalk up another issue on the "unintended consequences of social media" toteboard, I guess.

You could do it the seinfeld way and get people their invitations the week before the ceremony.  It's an unvitation!

Yay! My disdain for a large segment of the human race is justified once again.

I wish every wedding invite I ever got and ever will get was a not-invite.

Dear Abby:
I didn't get invited to thousands of weddings last weekend, but I also didn't get not-invited to the same thousand weddings.  How should I feel?  I did go to twenty of them and swiped some good loot and a few bottles of booze, though.

I don't mind going to friend's weddings, but if one said "We don't want an expensive wedding with a lot of guests," I would be fine with sitting it out. It's not my wedding, after all, so why would I stress out about it?

It's one of the times being a schizoid homebound misanthrope really comes in handy. The number of people I know well enough to invite to a wedding is probably under 20.

Of course, being a schizoid homebound misanthrope makes me about as likely to find and land a husband as the Vikings are to win the Super Bowl, so the whole "who to invite to my wedding" issue has become largely moot.

All I know is that CafeMom and eyeball-rolling go hand in hand for me.

As a sufferer of pretty bad social anxiety, I'm alright with this.
Wedding invitations are the worst because you have so long to stew over it.

BarkingUnicorn: I was invited a wedding once, back in college.  I farked the bride during the reception and bragged about it.  Nobody ever bothered me with that shiat again.

One day I'm gon' marry a porn star
We'll have a big ass crib and a long yard
We'll have a mansion and some fly maids
Nothin' to hide, we both screwed the bridesmaid

We just threw a BBQ for people who weren't invited to our small wedding.  Helluva lot cheaper and they still were compelled to buy us a gift

I don't give a fark if I'm invited to most people's weddings, and I have the common sense to know that not receiving an invitation means I'm not invited, but I would show up out of spite if someone explicitly informed me that I was not invited.

jayhawk88: It's terrible of me to say, but we need a supervillain or a threat of an asteroid strike or a lava men uprising or something. Just to globally pull back the reigns a bit on stupid shiat.



/I know
//I know
///keep the monsters in their thread

I am a-okay with not going to some idiotic wedding.

CSB:
My fiancé got an invite to the wedding of a guy she went to grad school with. Apparently he had a huge thing for her to the point that he wrote her a bunch of shiatty love poems. He sent me the non-vite but included the info for his Amazon registry. My fiance politely declined. I sent his bride something similar to this:

"social media serving as wedding announcements on steroids"

How 'bout you don't post time, date, and location on Facebook if you don't want a bunch of your "friends" to show up for the wedding?

The financial consequences associated with a failed marriage don't warrant the risk.

You don't need to be married to have a physical relationship anymore.

You don't need to be married to have a kid anymore either.

Save your cash and quit falling for this achaic trap.

WordyGrrl: What ever happened to saying "we can't afford a big fancy reception, so let's all meet up at some restaurant/bar and party?"

Two of my friends did similar, but she spread it out as a few weeks before the wedding a party with his friends and a party with her friends, and after the wedding a party for the family/friends of anyone who wanted to join them.  It was actually more fun than most wedding, and they even let us know to not get them a gift, but just have fun and tip your servers well.  The wedding itself was immediate family and a few like-family friends, and I heard it was great but I really didn't mind missing it.

They're both bartenders who are in college, there was no way they could afford a traditional wedding with as many friends as they have.  I'm surprised more couples don't do similar.

This is breathtakingly rude. People know they're not invited when they don't get an invitation. And it's equally rude to ask if you're invited. But I wonder if some people are getting questions from people asking about their invitations or assuming they're invited and don't have the guts to tell them personally that they're not on the list.

There's a problem that crops up frequently. The couple sends an invitation addressed to two people. The reply card comes back with 4 people attending. It's usually people who can't comprehend that their children aren't invited (and often refuse to attend unless the kids are invited).

When I was wedding planning and going on planning message boards, I found that a lot of people are doing things backward. They pick a reception venue, then they realize they can't invite many people either because the place is too small or it's too expensive.

I have professional event planning and experience and people have asked me for wedding planning advice. Then they tell me I'm wrong or they ignore what I tell them. It's why I won't do wedding planning. It's impossible to get some people to understand budgeting. I tell them it needs to be their first step: determine the total amount of money you have to spend. And they something like "I can't do that until I know how much things cost." Or "well, how much will it cost?" It can cost any amount you like. "No, how much does a regular wedding cost?" And then I strangle her.

If you don't want someone at your wedding, don't tell them you're getting married.  Unless they are so unhinged that they would stalk you, find out about the wedding, and crash it with a flamethrower.  If that is the case, you need a police restraining order, not an un-invitation.

Phins: People know they're not invited when they don't get an invitation.

This is an incorrect assumption far too many times these days.

BarkingUnicorn: I was invited a wedding once, back in college.  I farked the bride during the reception and bragged about it.  Nobody ever bothered me with that shiat again.

You were invited to a wedding once, and never again, huh? You sound really popular.

My friends showed up at the parking lot of the reception with a beer keg in the back of a pickup.
I went out and had a good time with them while all the guests (who jumped the food line while the pictures were being taken so that there was nothing left for the bride and groom) were drinking campaign.

NobleHam: I don't give a fark if I'm invited to most people's weddings, and I have the common sense to know that not receiving an invitation means I'm not invited, but I would show up out of spite if someone explicitly informed me that I was not invited.

Hell, I'd show up with fellow non-invitees in tow.

I got a non-invite last year -- from the sister of the bride, no less. I wasn't particularly close to the bride (she was a former co-worker whom I hadn't heard from in a few years), so I wasn't expecting an invite anyways, and until a mutual friend e-mailed me about the wedding, wasn't even aware she was marrying. And yet, her sister calls me to tell me I'm not invited, "... but if you want to participate in the wedding, you can still send a gift." fark that. The "non-invites" are just cash and swag grabs aimed at folks who as non-invitees are under no obligation to send a gift.

HotWingAgenda: If you don't want someone at your wedding, don't tell them you're getting married.

And how exactly are you supposed to do that?  Make the friends you do want to invite sign a contract saying they won't mention it to the friends who aren't invited?  Block your Facebook status update to certain friends?  Negotiate with the newspaper to "accidentally" not deliver the day's paper to certain friends?  Get the registry websites to block certain IP addresses of the friends you don't want to invite?