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(Uproxx)   Kai the hatchet-wielding heroic homeless hitchhiker gets the autotuning he so richly deserves. Huzzah   (uproxx.com) divider line 65
    More: Followup, hatchet, hitchhikers, news correspondent, homeless  
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10530 clicks; posted to Main » on 07 Feb 2013 at 3:09 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



65 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

Archived thread
 
2013-02-07 01:45:53 PM
sharetv.org

Yo A O, Hom Var Ray,
Yo A Ra, Jerhume Brunnen G
Way Ro Way, Ro Hanna Ro,
A Way Ro Ra, Jay Hanna Ray
Yo A O, Hom Var Ray,
Yo A Ra, Jerhume Brunnen G
Yo A O, Hom Var Ray,
Yo A Ra, Jerhume Brunnen G
Yo A O, Hom Var Ray,
Yo A Ra, Jerhume Brunnen G
Yo A Ra, Jerhume Brunnen G
 
2013-02-07 01:53:16 PM
I give him 6 months before somebody finds him dead in a derelict bus in the Alaskan wilderness.

/don't know why I'm getting that vibe
 
2013-02-07 01:55:05 PM
Oh, this guy's a howl.

Link  (NSFW language)
 
2013-02-07 02:15:07 PM

RexTalionis: [sharetv.org image 225x300]


Came here to post that, but I'll have to go to the backup instead.
24.media.tumblr.com
 
2013-02-07 02:15:59 PM

xanadian: Oh, this guy's a howl.

Link  (NSFW language)


That is awesome.
 
2013-02-07 02:19:14 PM

serial_crusher: RexTalionis: [sharetv.org image 225x300]

Came here to post that, but I'll have to go to the backup instead.
[24.media.tumblr.com image 292x356]


sharetv.org
 
2013-02-07 02:21:31 PM
A star is born.
 
2013-02-07 02:25:26 PM
Much like naming your daughter a "stripper" name ensures their future, naming your son "Kai" does much the same.
 
2013-02-07 03:09:11 PM

TheDumbBlonde: Much like naming your daughter a "stripper" name ensures their future, naming your son "Kai" does much the same.


"Kai" is his nickname. His real name is "Kyle".
 
2013-02-07 03:11:01 PM

TheDumbBlonde: Much like naming your daughter a "stripper" name ensures their future, naming your son "Kai" does much the same.


Kai Ryssdal did pretty well for himself.

www.marketplace.org
 
2013-02-07 03:13:41 PM
Whom?
 
2013-02-07 03:15:30 PM
You know they are just biding their time to throw all these internet people in a house with cameras for a reality show. Let's see, we got Kai, the 'aint no body got time for that' lady, the 'lock your door, they be rapin' guy, and the list goes on. I'd probably check out an episode or two.
 
2013-02-07 03:16:38 PM

RexTalionis: Kai Ryssdal did pretty well for himself.


that is NOT how i pictured him.

this is how i pictured him:

blogs.dallasobserver.com
 
2013-02-07 03:18:03 PM

LeroyBourne: You know they are just biding their time to throw all these internet people in a house with cameras for a reality show. Let's see, we got Kai, the 'aint no body got time for that' lady, the 'lock your door, they be rapin' guy, and the list goes on. I'd probably check out an episode or two.


I would watch a show with Patrick Tribett in a second.
 
2013-02-07 03:18:20 PM
Wow. That didn't take long.
 
2013-02-07 03:21:08 PM
cdn.uproxx.com
 
2013-02-07 03:22:47 PM

FlashHarry: RexTalionis: Kai Ryssdal did pretty well for himself.

that is NOT how i pictured him.

this is how i pictured him:

[blogs.dallasobserver.com image 300x400]


www.vigilantedetective.com
Knows what you mean.
 
2013-02-07 03:24:26 PM
I saw that episode of "I Love Lucy" years ago.

www.oocities.org
 
2013-02-07 03:24:51 PM
t3.gstatic.com
 
2013-02-07 03:30:18 PM
Why is there no commenting on featured partner threads?
 
2013-02-07 03:37:51 PM

Evil Mackerel: Why is there no commenting on featured partner threads?


There is, but the comments are invisible.
 
2013-02-07 03:38:14 PM
This says it all for me.
 
2013-02-07 03:39:32 PM

clintster: [cdn.uproxx.com image 500x282]


this I shall quote to the next proselytizer I meet.
Memorizing it now.
 
2013-02-07 03:39:56 PM

PEEKABOO. ASSHOLE.
 
2013-02-07 03:40:46 PM
In Swahili "kai" means "loveable". Damn straight.

/smash smash smash
/you're worthwhile
 
2013-02-07 03:42:17 PM
media.comicvine.com
PEEKABOO. ASSHOLE.


//Round 2
 
2013-02-07 03:45:23 PM

Evil Mackerel: Why is there no commenting on featured partner threads?


Same reason I wrote a chrome extension to hide them. Because they suck.
 
2013-02-07 03:51:47 PM

StRalphTheLiar: Evil Mackerel: Why is there no commenting on featured partner threads?

Same reason I wrote a chrome extension to hide them. Because they suck.


And all of the comments would be along the lines of... "Fark, you sold out!"

Can I get your extension??
 
2013-02-07 03:56:35 PM
This is sure to be a suh-mash hit.
 
2013-02-07 03:59:43 PM
The internet wins again!!
 
2013-02-07 04:09:03 PM
When you have a hitchhiker admitting to killing a guy, don't you at least take his fingerprints or something?  Just to check them against unsolved murders?
 
2013-02-07 04:09:09 PM
An autotune with a message. Good guy Kai.
 
2013-02-07 04:10:35 PM

SmellsLikePoo: Can I get your extension??


seconded.
 
2013-02-07 04:15:53 PM
We have got to get these two guys together....
mcself.files.wordpress.com
 
2013-02-07 04:24:02 PM
Good for Kai.  He sounds like a righteous dude.

We need more humans like him.
 
2013-02-07 04:26:58 PM
Homeless hitchhiking hatchet-wielding hillbillies represent...

http://wvgazette.com/News/201302050221">http://wvgazette.com/News/20 13 02050221

Respeck, redneck.
 
2013-02-07 04:36:15 PM

Evil Mackerel: Why is there no commenting on featured partner threads?


Remember the heckling the Cuervo Moment of the Day sponsored links got? That's why.
 
2013-02-07 04:40:09 PM
Aw, they didn't use "Straight Outta Dogtown".
 
2013-02-07 04:44:37 PM
I'm worthwhile. Kai said so.
 
2013-02-07 04:56:35 PM
I want to have a beer with Kai. Seems like an awesome dude to chill with.
 
2013-02-07 05:31:20 PM

RexTalionis: TheDumbBlonde: Much like naming your daughter a "stripper" name ensures their future, naming your son "Kai" does much the same.

Kai Ryssdal did pretty well for himself.


So that's what that douche looks like.
 
2013-02-07 05:32:44 PM
I wish he would have stayed around the area, I would have bought homie a pint or two.

/Fresno
 
2013-02-07 05:34:36 PM

Bathia_Mapes: TheDumbBlonde: Much like naming your daughter a "stripper" name ensures their future, naming your son "Kai" does much the same.

"Kai" is his nickname. His real name is "Kyle".


Or, if you name your kid Kai, you might just be Finnish.
 
2013-02-07 05:42:49 PM

RexTalionis: [sharetv.org image 225x300]

serial_crusher: RexTalionis: [sharetv.org image 225x300]

RexTalionis: serial_crusher: RexTalionis: [sharetv.org image 225x300]

img5.imageshack.us
 
2013-02-07 06:51:47 PM
Kinda felt like schmoyoho was phoning it in on this one. Nowhere near as catchy as bed intruder or dayum dayum dayum.
 
2013-02-07 06:59:16 PM

BokChoy: Kinda felt like schmoyoho was phoning it in on this one. Nowhere near as catchy as bed intruder or dayum dayum dayum.


Links?

I thought this was pretty good but Kai is just brain damaged whether he knows it or not.
 
2013-02-07 07:01:23 PM
sharetv.org
The dead do not autotune.
 
2013-02-07 07:04:40 PM
4.bp.blogspot.com

Homeless huh? Did someone blow up his planet?
 
2013-02-07 07:10:28 PM

xanadian: I give him 6 months before somebody finds him dead in a derelict bus in the Alaskan wilderness.

/don't know why I'm getting that vibe


bingo.

what i don't get - Kai claims he's been homeless (raped for hours age 17) etcetera but there he is clean shaven, teeth in good repair, wearing a trendy hip t shirt and toting a nice clean big buck back pack. me thinks Kai is not who he pretends he is. still, 6 months tops is okay with me.
 
2013-02-07 07:12:35 PM

fireclown: When you have a hitchhiker admitting to killing a guy, don't you at least take his fingerprints or something?  Just to check them against unsolved murders?


no one died
 
2013-02-07 07:26:30 PM

KrispyKritter: what i don't get - Kai claims he's been homeless (raped for hours age 17) etcetera but there he is clean shaven, teeth in good repair, wearing a trendy hip t shirt and toting a nice clean big buck back pack. me thinks Kai is not who he pretends he is. still, 6 months tops is okay with me.


WTF?
 
2013-02-07 07:28:09 PM
The dude is awesome, but that Autotune was not nearly as good as I thought it could be.
 
2013-02-07 08:56:44 PM
I'm I the only one sick of this guy?

/I was sick of him several seconds into his first interview.
//Not sick of the Last of the Brunnen-G
 
2013-02-07 09:08:29 PM
Who is the copyright troll at KMPH? farking douche bags need a big steaming pile of shiat delivered to the office!!
 
2013-02-07 10:29:20 PM

KrispyKritter: xanadian: I give him 6 months before somebody finds him dead in a derelict bus in the Alaskan wilderness.

/don't know why I'm getting that vibe

bingo.

what i don't get - Kai claims he's been homeless (raped for hours age 17) etcetera but there he is clean shaven, teeth in good repair, wearing a trendy hip t shirt and toting a nice clean big buck back pack. me thinks Kai is not who he pretends he is. still, 6 months tops is okay with me.


Dr. Bruce Banner would prefer to keep a low profile.
 
2013-02-07 10:42:36 PM
What about Roland the headless thompson gunner?
 
2013-02-07 10:48:46 PM

Smgth: I'm I the only one sick of this guy?

/I was sick of him several seconds into his first interview.
//Not sick of the Last of the Brunnen-G


Like a turd in the punchbowl, you must be an utter hit at parties.
 
2013-02-07 10:53:17 PM
That was really weak. We need schmoyoho or whoever they are on this
 
2013-02-07 10:55:16 PM

Evil Mackerel: Why is there no commenting on featured partner threads?


Those featured partner threads are getting me closer and closer to leaving fark for good.

yeah yeah there's the door, etc
 
2013-02-07 11:05:24 PM

UncleStumpy: Evil Mackerel: Why is there no commenting on featured partner threads?

Those featured partner threads are getting me closer and closer to leaving fark for good.

yeah yeah there's the door, etc


Reminds me of Digg, before it went tits up.
 
2013-02-08 12:22:00 AM

Smgth: I'm I the only one sick of this guy?

/I was sick of him several seconds into his first interview.
//Not sick of the Last of the Brunnen-G


No, I'm completely with you. Dude is obnoxious as hell.
 
2013-02-08 04:40:46 AM

LeroyBourne: You know they are just biding their time to throw all these internet people in a house with cameras for a reality show. Let's see, we got Kai, the 'aint no body got time for that' lady, the 'lock your door, they be rapin' guy, and the list goes on. I'd probably check out an episode or two.


Throw in Bubb Rubb, and I'd probably watch that.
 
2013-02-08 04:41:12 AM
LEXX!
 
2013-02-08 06:08:16 AM
"Huzzah"

Aw crap, am I going to have to fight Balrog AGAIN?!
 
2013-02-08 10:01:46 AM
I'm so proud.

/another Kai
 
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