If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(Jezebel)   The best advice some people will never learn: "If women keep responding to you like you're some weirdo creeper, then chances are that you're acting like a weirdo creeper"   (jezebel.com) divider line 635
    More: Interesting, sex predator, p.f. chang, Amy Pond  
•       •       •

10608 clicks; posted to Main » on 06 Feb 2013 at 12:45 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



635 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

Archived thread

First | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | » | Last | Show all
 
2013-02-06 10:21:50 AM  

fredklein: Theaetetus: fredklein: ciberido: The rule of not being a creep is, Don't come onto a woman in a way that bothers her; don't express attraction to a woman who doesn't want your attention. So, yes, all other things being equal, it's possible that Bob the Super-Handsome can do some "X" that will not come off as creepy to most women where Tim the Ugly Duckling will come off as creepy to the same women for the same "X."

You can say that makes women shallow if you like, but it doesn't change the basic fact that Tim SHOULD NOT DO "X."

But he sees 'X' working- after all, Bob did it and got laid.

Gosh, if only there was some distinction, some sort of text-but-not-text, like a con-text, that could make something okay in one situation and not okay in another...

No two situations are EXACTLY alike. Therefore, a solution that works for one situation would never work, and should never, ever be attempted in a different, but similar situation. Got it.


I had sex with my wife. It was great. I'm going to have sex with your wife. If she has any questions, I'll just show her this thread as your tacit approval.
 
2013-02-06 10:25:43 AM  

The sound of one hand clapping: Dating sites are OK, but honestly, I've found that people are way, way more superficial on a dating site than they are in real life.  I think it's because they don't have the personality to go off, so they tend to just go off looks rather than reading the profile and seeing if the person seems interesting.


Oh, I know. I went into it with that a probability. But both of those sites are free to use and only cost me some time to get things set up. So, seeing how I had fark all to do one evening, I made accounts. I turned on Pandora and went to work making the two profiles. If nothing comes from it, then there's little lost. If something comes from it, then great.

I'd much rather meet and get to know people in person. I'm just not sure how to go about finding my kind of people.
 
2013-02-06 10:29:56 AM  
If I were to try, it would be just like this (which is why I no longer try). Henry Phillips, The Loner.

If you're shy and a woman (or a gay man, or straight man who happens to unknowingly sit on the wrong park bench) there will be a man who tries to pick up on you. If you're shy and a straight guy, you are (figuratively) screwed. Might as well give up. Nothing sets off a woman's "creep meter" faster than being ill at ease because you're sure you're going to be rejected. The Forty Year Old Virgin was pretty darned close to seeing my life story on the big screen. I could write a book, but it'd be really boring, and no one would want to read it. At least dogs and cats can tell I'm an allright guy.
 
2013-02-06 10:31:26 AM  
I keep my outlook on relationships rather simple:

1) Half the liquid is in the glass.

2) The grapes ARE sour.

3) If you don't like lemonade, then you needn't worry about what to do when being handed lemons.

4) Winners never quit and quitters never win, but those that never win and never quit are idiots.

5) Always make people think you know something they don't.

6) If people think they've figured you out, do something that doesn't fit their pigeon-holing and keep them off-balance.
 
2013-02-06 10:33:35 AM  

freeforever: You are the reason the pickup artist community exists...and thrives.  Being a pickup artist is ALL ABOUT "stimulating the mind," regardless of what feminists would have you believe.  It's not about cheesy pickup lines, rude insults and trying to score on the first date.  A pickup artist is someone who uses his resources to make himself the most attractive he can be.  That you assume to know what kind of relationship pickup artists want proves you don't know ...


I'm just going to have to call B.S. on this, sorry.

At least, if the PUA websites accurately reflect the "pickup artist community," as you call it.
 
2013-02-06 10:35:00 AM  

Comsamvimes: I'm not bad looking, I'm just crushingly awkward and shy. Makes meeting girls very hard. And I have a very hard time telling when a girl is craving my wave.

/Still remember the last day of high school when a classmate said "Yeah, like half the girls in school had a crush on you."
//Responded with "Wait, whaaaaaa? They did? WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME THIS BEFORE WHEN I COULD HAVE USED THAT INFORMATION?!"


It's quite possible they didn't tell you then because it wasn't true then.  Women lie about that sort of thing when they know there is no chance of having to back it up or recant it.
 
2013-02-06 10:36:20 AM  

CtrlAltDestroy: The sound of one hand clapping: Dating sites are OK, but honestly, I've found that people are way, way more superficial on a dating site than they are in real life.  I think it's because they don't have the personality to go off, so they tend to just go off looks rather than reading the profile and seeing if the person seems interesting.

Oh, I know. I went into it with that a probability. But both of those sites are free to use and only cost me some time to get things set up. So, seeing how I had fark all to do one evening, I made accounts. I turned on Pandora and went to work making the two profiles. If nothing comes from it, then there's little lost. If something comes from it, then great.

I'd much rather meet and get to know people in person. I'm just not sure how to go about finding my kind of people.


Sounds like you and me kind of think alike there then.  I went onto dating sites for exactly the same reason.  I prefer meeting in person but I've had no luck finding single girls in my age range.

I don't know if you've already tried this, but if you aren't having much luck and you have a trustworthy female friend, let her see your profile.  I literally couldn't figure out why I wasn't getting replies until my friend looked.  I thought my photo was fine and if anything I though maybe my summary was the problem.  I'd have never figured it out on my own.
 
2013-02-06 10:36:48 AM  

fredklein: No two situations are EXACTLY alike. Therefore, a solution that works for one situation would never work, and should never, ever be attempted in a different, but similar situation. Got it.


More like "No two people are EXACTLY alike. Therefore, a solution that works for one person might not work for another person, and should not be attempted until you know why it worked for that person and can be confident it will work for you."

"Don't be creepy" is probably the only universal rule when it comes to dealing with women. The basics are pretty, well, basic.

1) Never, ever, ever continue to pursue someone who has stated that she's not interested. A brief mistake here can follow you for years.
2) Do not take steps to look menacing (difficulty: using sexual humor with a stranger counts as menacing). But also do not go out of your way to not look menacing; that's even creepier.
3) Leave your obsessions at home. If you cannot do this, then express many obsessions at once: no fewer than four. If you cannot do this, you need more obsessions.
4) Do something with your hair. What matters here is just not ignoring your hair; exactly what you do with it doesn't matter so much, as long as you're clearly paying some attention to it.
5) Shower before going to meet people. If you cannot do this, then at least change your clothes. This is about smell, not sight, so change all your clothes, even things you don't expect people to see.
6) Get some women into your social circle: people who happen to be female, but in whom you are not interested romantically. Aside from having more friends -you can never have too many friends, especially local ones- this will help you get more comfortable dealing with women in general.
 
2013-02-06 10:39:46 AM  

SkunkWerks: Smackledorfer: women respond well to physically attractive, and poorly to ugly. Denying that is lying.

'Attractive' and 'Ugly' are subjective concepts.

I lie because I have different experiences than you, and I experience them differently.  Big shocker, I know.


Not completely. Find someone who would think John Merrick was attractive. Large surveys of humans show that there is a peak of the bell curve for what most of us find physically attractive. In the sense of aesthetics being shared by most humans, there are objective boundaries to both ugly, and pretty. Outliers (for one example, young guys who are very attracted to elderly women) don't negate this. None of this would apply to intelligent extra terrestrial life, whose aesthetics would have been formed by a completely different biosphere.
 
2013-02-06 10:41:05 AM  

The sound of one hand clapping: Dating sites are OK, but honestly, I've found that people are way, way more superficial on a dating site than they are in real life. I think it's because they don't have the personality to go off, so they tend to just go off looks rather than reading the profile and seeing if the person seems interesting.


It's not even that. You can't interact with a profile: you can't ask it questions, you can't bounce jokes or references off of it, and you can't watch it interact with others. It's really a very limited tool for making first impressions. People are more superficial on dating sites because they have to be: they don't have the tools they need to be anything else.

You need to keep this in mind, and consider whether you can make a better first impression online or in person. Do not use dating sites if you can make a better first impression without them.
 
2013-02-06 10:41:23 AM  

Tat'dGreaser: tinfoil-hat maggie: Heh, no. Try this guy attaches himself to two girls that walk into a bar, second dude end up engaging in conversation with first dude, girls make escape. Sorry just my 2 cents(not valid in Canada)

So dude number 1 was the creeper!?!? I like this mystery


I thought the butler was the creeper.
 
2013-02-06 10:46:06 AM  

AccuJack: If you think being seen as a "creeper" is bad, try being repeatedly friend zoned shortly after "hello".

Rejection is bad, being perceived as ruining a potential great friendship by wanting to actually *date* when that's what you had in mind from the start is really, really hard.

Seriously, I'm going to start acting like more of an asshole if it'll at least keep me from looking like someone who'd be a "really good friend".


This is so simple.  I already have a couple best friends.  I think everyone in the world has one or two good friends.  Making friends is kind of easy.  I don't really need anymore new friends, especially unwanted friends.

Go out drinking, on the ride home whip your dick out and say, "Get a load of this!".  If you are not that kind of guy, just ask 'Want to fool around?'.  You can always 'blame it on the alcohol' and say sorry I won't do it again (and mean it because you won't call her anymore).  If she doesn't want to be your friend anymore, fine, but if she does you best believe your dick is on her mind.

OK, you don't have to do that, but the point is you shouldn't be afraid to lose an unwanted friendship.  Be silly, unexpected, and respectfully human.

You know what?  The best advice I can give is to just enjoy life, and have fun. Do things you like (besides stay at home alone on the computer) and be happy.  People (girls) will see that and want to join you, and then you will be rolling in it.
 
2013-02-06 10:47:35 AM  

FirstNationalBastard: /however, if you are the type to read some bullshiat self-help book, I've some snake oil to sell you. If you rub it on yourself, women will flock to you!


Especially if you rub it on yourself during the morning commute on the subway.
 
2013-02-06 10:47:36 AM  
taurusowner:There have been a number of women in this thread who say "don't do ___" or "don't hit on people in retail/bartenders/etc". But the FACT is that if the guy was hot/rich/tall/buff enough, every single on of those women would break these rules. Females bartenders DO give out their real numbers to guys.....hot guys. Same with strippers, waitresses, that cute chick at Kohls, whatever. But no guy will know if he's the one she'll break the "rule" for until he tries.

Protip:  When you introduce an opinion as " the FACT is that " that's a pretty big warning sign.  Not of being a creeper, but of someone whose comment the rest of us should probably ignore as this is someone who is here to rant, rather than discuss.

Also "every single on of those women."  Another sign you're not here to listen to anyone else's opinion.
 
2013-02-06 10:49:33 AM  

Millennium: The sound of one hand clapping: Dating sites are OK, but honestly, I've found that people are way, way more superficial on a dating site than they are in real life. I think it's because they don't have the personality to go off, so they tend to just go off looks rather than reading the profile and seeing if the person seems interesting.

It's not even that. You can't interact with a profile: you can't ask it questions, you can't bounce jokes or references off of it, and you can't watch it interact with others. It's really a very limited tool for making first impressions. People are more superficial on dating sites because they have to be: they don't have the tools they need to be anything else.

You need to keep this in mind, and consider whether you can make a better first impression online or in person. Do not use dating sites if you can make a better first impression without them.


This is true.  I was more getting at the fact that most people don't even seem to bother reading the profile though.  I do because I'm looking for someone compatible, not just someone who looks good.  I'll take a chance on someone who isn't 'my type' if they are into the same things as me.  Unfortunately it seems that most people don't do this.  As witness by the difference that simply changing my picture made.

I'm not getting down on dating sites though.  Now that I've got it figured I've had enough success that it's been worth it.

And I 100% agree with what you said about sticking to in person encounters if possible for anyone with confidence.
 
2013-02-06 10:51:26 AM  
The sound of one hand clapping:
Sounds like you and me kind of think alike there then.  I went onto dating sites for exactly the same reason.  I prefer meeting in person but I've had no luck finding single girls in my age range.

I don't know if you've already tried this, but if you aren't having much luck and you have a trustworthy female friend, let her see your profile.  I literally couldn't figure out why I wasn't getting replies until my friend looked.  I thought my photo was fine and if anything I though maybe my summary was the problem.  I'd have never figured it out on my own.


I've thought about it but I don't have anyone that I can ask. I thought, for a split second, about asking anonymous for a critique but then realized how dangerous that would be. I do want to take some new pictutes soon. But I can't, for the life of me, look good in a picture. My looks are already iffy and this inability to look decent in a photo doesn't help. I might try to overhaul the profiles this weekend.

/Holy hell Fark's new comment system is not phone friendly.
 
2013-02-06 10:54:41 AM  

CtrlAltDestroy: gulogulo: Yeah, it can be really tough. I think, too, I tend to be a little bit more extroverted than it sounds like you are, so I have lots of friends that I go out with, and when I'm out with them is when I meet those rare individuals.

I am pretty introverted, but not to the point where I'm totally screwed up socially because of it. I can get into an extroverted mood at times. Sometimes I'm in the mood for human interaction. Sometimes I need to be alone to recharge. My brother is more extroverted than I am, yet (as his girlfriend pointed out) I'm better/more easy going/more open socially than he is. I prefer smaller groups of known people to large groups of strangers. At best, I enjoy talking to others. At worst, I can fake it for an evening. I tend to think of myself as a "functional geek". When I was in customer service hell I was always one of the better employees. Nowadays I'm making a living working with my hands in a job that's a mix of an IT and mechanic role.

I'm not afraid of people and I'm talented with my hands. I'm not the stereotypical geek, even though I enjoy many of the stereotypical geek things.

gulogulo: However, for someone like you and I who are stimulated by interests and thoughts first, I might recommend trying something like OKCupid.

I'm in the SW burbs. I have an account on OKC and PoF. OKC is much better. The accounts have been open for about 3/4 of a year now. There's a fair amount of information about myself. There's enough to get a feel for who I am while leaving something to talk about in person. There's also recent and straightforward (no myspace angles) photos.

So far I've had some luck with one girl. We conversations over the messenger and texted a few times. She eventually asks what intentions I had just to make sure that I wasn't leading her on (IE was actually interested in dating). Then later she tells me that she's about to move 4 hours away for college, which she knew all along. WTF? Anyway, I say that we should meet at l ...


Two pieces of advice for online dating:
1.  OKC wrote a blog on the best way to write a dating profile to get responses.  In general, you want to give specific examples and elaborate on them, rather than just list a bunch of stuff.
So for like "What would you like to do with your life?"
Do not say: "I want to travel."
Say: "I'd like to go to europe soon, I always wanted to visit Salzburg austria and watch a mozart opera".

This does two things. One, it makes you stand out and gives you somewhat of a personality.  And two, it gives them more information that they can find common ground in (maybe they like opera too).

2. Get 2-3 female friends to independently review the profile and tell you what to change.  Preferably not someone like a sister or really close, but someone you're good enough friends with that will tell you what's wrong with it.
 
2013-02-06 10:54:53 AM  

The sound of one hand clapping: CtrlAltDestroy: Anyway, yeah. I haven't had any luck so far. The messages I sent to others have never garnered a response and I've only been contacted by 1 person who seemed interesting. There were a couple of other messages I received. 1 lead to nothing and the other was a 1 line "hi wanna chat" from an empty profile.

I've thought about said profiles recently. I need to rework them. There's good info, but it seems too boring. I need to get more of my sense of humor in there and make it less matter-of-fact.

Dating sites are OK, but honestly, I've found that people are way, way more superficial on a dating site than they are in real life.  I think it's because they don't have the personality to go off, so they tend to just go off looks rather than reading the profile and seeing if the person seems interesting.

Case in point.  I had profiles on OKC, POF and I've since moved to Match.com.  The OKC and POF profiles were up for 2 months before I got rid of them, the Match.com one about 1 month to date.  To begin with I got only 1 reply despite sending messages to over 40 women in my area.  Eventually I got really fed up and talked to a girl I know about it.  She asked to look at my profile and said 'it's your picture'.  I thought the pic was OK but she said it didn't make me look good.  She helped me take some more pics and I let her choose which one I'd use.  And I'll be damned it worked!  I got 2 responses after messaging 15 women and a third woman even contacted me directly.

You'll always have more luck in real life if you can charm someone because they will overlook your appearance.  On a dating site most will just see if they like how you look.  I'm sure guys do the same so I'm not trying to get at women here, just stating my experience.


Yeah, I'm hating OkCupid so far. What piques my interest in women on that site (besides attractiveness) is profiles that show they're either witty, unique, subversive, or even attempting to be one of those. I can spend an hour going through profiles and not find one that meets that pretty simple criteria . All you get is, "I like good things, I don't like bad things, I like vacations and tasty food" Awesome, so does every other human being on the planet.
 
2013-02-06 10:56:24 AM  

Tat'dGreaser: tinfoil-hat maggie: Zoinks ; ) And I don't even have a cool mystery van wait that could sound weird ; )

Well if women call it a Rape Van then it's cute and saucy, so go for it.




I've got a friend that calls her van the MILF Rocket.

/and it is
 
2013-02-06 10:56:59 AM  

Repo Man: Find someone who would think John Merrick was attractive.


Repo Man: the bell curve


There are always outliers.

Find someone who is romantically attracted to Pluto- the planet large rock orbiting our solar system, not the cartoon character (well aware you could find more than a handful of the latter in this wacky world of ours).

Those terms- within the confines of normal experience- are still subjective.  The degree of variation in fetish porn alone should be proof enough of just how broadly those concepts can be perceived.

Repo Man: None of this would apply to intelligent extra terrestrial life, whose aesthetics would have been formed by a completely different biosphere.


Arthur C. Clarke once said that- if there were life on other planets- not only would it be beyond our imagination, it would be beyond our capacity to imagine.  He was pitching the idea that the very physical structure of the human brain by definition limits its capacities.

I think he's right, but I think we're talking about limits that are so far out on the horizon that you'd have to be talking about an event that represents millions of light years of distance to reckon them a factor.
 
2013-02-06 10:59:02 AM  

Tyrone Slothrop: I wasn't aware asking a woman to go out to dinner or a movie was being a weirdo creeper. Good to know. Next time I'll just grab her tits.


Good idea.  It'll reveal the real you that much faster and save everyone time.
 
2013-02-06 10:59:30 AM  
www.behindthevoiceactors.com

Fark...I am disappoint
 
2013-02-06 10:59:51 AM  
I think if you are going to be successful at approaching women you don't already know, it's important to have a really realistic appraisal of yourself. Every guy secretly believes that he deserves a beautiful woman solely by virtue of being the protagonist in his own life story. Realizing that the universe actually owes you nothing is one of the most liberating truths I have ever personally had to learn, but it's endlessly applicable to dating as well.

So be honest about your own level of attractiveness and if you get too ambitious, don't be so surprised when you get shot down. You wouldn't date a girl that was significantly less attractive than you normally get, so why should she? You're not farking special, is my point. If you really want to improve your romantic situation, work out more and wear nicer clothes. There are things you can do.
 
2013-02-06 11:01:32 AM  

Repo Man: SkunkWerks: Smackledorfer: women respond well to physically attractive, and poorly to ugly. Denying that is lying.

'Attractive' and 'Ugly' are subjective concepts.

I lie because I have different experiences than you, and I experience them differently.  Big shocker, I know.

Not completely. Find someone who would think John Merrick was attractive. Large surveys of humans show that there is a peak of the bell curve for what most of us find physically attractive. In the sense of aesthetics

My best friend has a crush on Tatum Channing. I think he's a butter face. I have a crush on Ryan Gosling. My friend thinks he's wonky eye and calls him "Male Paris". Taste is subjective and I highly doubt you look like John Merrick.
 
2013-02-06 11:06:32 AM  

Millennium: It's not even that. You can't interact with a profile: you can't ask it questions, you can't bounce jokes or references off of it, and you can't watch it interact with others. It's really a very limited tool for making first impressions. People are more superficial on dating sites because they have to be: they don't have the tools they need to be anything else.

You need to keep this in mind, and consider whether you can make a better first impression online or in person. Do not use dating sites if you can make a better first impression without them.


This is why it's best to meet that person as soon as possible.  And don't make it a date. Make it "hey, let's go do something fun we both enjoy doing." like taking a hike, fishing, etc.
 
2013-02-06 11:07:31 AM  

Tommy Moo: As for the "women like jerks" thing: I find that some women like nice guys and some girls like jerks and some girls like both. What all women like are strong guys. It's a quadrant. You can be mean and weak. Think of a sniveling, angry, bitter jerk who biatches on Facebook about how girls are stupid all the time. These guys never get laid. You can also be nice and weak, like the white knights who lavish girls with praise and complements and then jerk off on Saturday nights instead of taking a shot. It's the strength that women like, and sometimes weak nice guys mistake what girls want when they go for strong jerks. There are strong nice guys who do very well. Think of a club proprietor, the guy who goes around making sure everyone feels safe and everyone is having a good time.


Alright, I take it back.  It would be a shame to put you on an ignore list because you do sometimes say things worth listening to.

I doubt you care much about my opinion, but for what little it's worth, you have redeemed yourself.
 
2013-02-06 11:09:16 AM  

CtrlAltDestroy: I've thought about it but I don't have anyone that I can ask. I thought, for a split second, about asking anonymous for a critique but then realized how dangerous that would be. I do want to take some new pictutes soon. But I can't, for the life of me, look good in a picture. My looks are already iffy and this inability to look decent in a photo doesn't help. I might try to overhaul the profiles this weekend.


If you want to have me have a peek at it, I'd be happy to. EIP.
 
2013-02-06 11:11:27 AM  
nickerj1:

Eh, quote got deleted. I'm on my phone.

Yeah, I do actively try to add details to things like that. I should go back redo my profile in general, though. A turn off for me on a profile is generic statements with no substance. I'll keep that in mind, thanks. For the second part, I don't have anyone that I can ask to do that. Last year for me was crappy. It's a looong story, but going into last year I had only a couple of friends. After the things that happened over the course of the year, I now have none. Blarg, sad panda, etc.
 
2013-02-06 11:12:02 AM  

CtrlAltDestroy: I've thought about it but I don't have anyone that I can ask. I thought, for a split second, about asking anonymous for a critique but then realized how dangerous that would be. I do want to take some new pictutes soon. But I can't, for the life of me, look good in a picture. My looks are already iffy and this inability to look decent in a photo doesn't help. I might try to overhaul the profiles this weekend.

/Holy hell Fark's new comment system is not phone friendly.


There's your problem.  It is hard to get a girlfriend without female friends, pretty much impossible without any friends at all.  It gives you practice talking to girls.  It makes you more attractive to unknown females because they see you talking to females.  It tells everyone you aren't a creeper.  Female friends increase attractiveness exponentially.  Hot female friends increase attractiveness exponentially cubed.

If you're a hermit, you can change that by joining activity clubs.  Kickball, bocce, any local sporting stuff with young adults.  Volunteering is also huge.  Volunteer at whatever local thing to meet people.  Get off fark and go out and start doing stuff in your spare time to meet people.  Start hanging out with them, girls and guys alike.

Your objective should be: "Find guys and girls to have fun with and be friends with"
By virtue of doing that, you'll eventually come across a girl that's attracted to you.
 
2013-02-06 11:13:11 AM  

fredklein: ciberido: The rule of not being a creep is, Don't come onto a woman in a way that bothers her; don't express attraction to a woman who doesn't want your attention. So, yes, all other things being equal, it's possible that Bob the Super-Handsome can do some "X" that will not come off as creepy to most women where Tim the Ugly Duckling will come off as creepy to the same women for the same "X."

You can say that makes women shallow if you like, but it doesn't change the basic fact that Tim SHOULD NOT DO "X."

But he sees 'X' working- after all, Bob did it and got laid.


Fair enough.  By "should not do X" I don't so much mean "X never works" as "X is morally wrong."  "Should" in the moralistic sense.
 
2013-02-06 11:17:42 AM  

miss diminutive: Yogimus: Throw jizz in her face and yell: "I CAN SMELL YOUR CUNNNT!"

You know what you look like to me, with your clever quote and your cheap profile? You look like a liter. A well scrubbed, hustling liter with a little taste. Good education's given you some length of post, but you're not more than one generation from poor AOL trash, are you, Yogimus? And that accent you've tried so desperately to shed: pure Silicon Valley. What is your father, dear? Is he a LAN admin? Does he stink of exhaust fan? You know how quickly the boys found you... all that tedious sticky cybering in yahoo chatrooms... while you could only dream of getting out... getting anywhere... getting all the way to F.A.R.K.


Sweet zombie Jesus, now I want to creep you out like nobody else.
 
2013-02-06 11:23:18 AM  

Serious Post on Serious Thread: ciberido: Serious Post on Serious Thread: The thrust of the article, is about INITIAL IMPRESSIONS that project a sense of 'creepiness'. The criticism of the article is that one finds a person unattractive you are never going to find out if they are 'creepy' or 'swell'. Your lazy comments communicate the obvious and unargued, by anyone, article included point that once you get to know some one, attractive or not, you may or may not find them creepy.

That's a "criticism" of the article in the same way "death panels!" is a criticism of Obamacare.

I'm sure that sounded terribly insightful in your head as you were typing it.



Insightful?  Not at all.  Point out that your argument was crap was about as insightful as pointing out that the ocean is wet.

I did think it was the teeniest bit witty, though.
 
2013-02-06 11:26:38 AM  
This just in:  Women can be picky assholes.  Not good at public speaking or talking to strangers?  Creep.  Too respectful but still horny?  Creep.  Broke but otherwise charming?  Creep.  Trying too hard? Creep.  There is no relational fark up that a guy can commit that is not punishable by fire.  I'm SOOOOO  glad to be married and not have to deal with picky biatches any more.  (Now I just have to focus on the one)
 
2013-02-06 11:28:31 AM  

Serious Post on Serious Thread: SAT time:

Jezebel is to Gender Relations as:
a) Townhall is to Politics
b) Clowns are to Comedy
c) Fark is to News
d) Goatse is to Erotica
e) All of the Above

/Hint: The Answer is 'e'


When I see the link, I usually think of it as 'Consumerist for chicks'
 
2013-02-06 11:31:44 AM  

CtrlAltDestroy: I've thought about it but I don't have anyone that I can ask. I thought, for a split second, about asking anonymous for a critique but then realized how dangerous that would be. I do want to take some new pictutes soon. But I can't, for the life of me, look good in a picture. My looks are already iffy and this inability to look decent in a photo doesn't help. I might try to overhaul the profiles this weekend.

/Holy hell Fark's new comment system is not phone friendly.


It is hard if you don't have anyone to ask.  I agree with you 110% on not asking anyone anonymous   For starters, they don't know what you look like in person so they aren't in a position to say whether your photo's capture the real you.  And they don't know your personality so they can't really judge if your profile is a good representation.  Maybe there's a work colleague, even at a push a family member who you think might give you an honest opinion rather than a biased opinion.

And I feel your pain.  I hate taking photo's of myself and was a real pain in the ass to my friend when she was trying to get a decent photo from me.  Mostly she said it's the smile and the eyes.

Anyways, hope you have more luck and that you can work it out.
 
2013-02-06 11:32:42 AM  

plewis: This just in:  Women can be picky assholes.  Not good at public speaking or talking to strangers?  Creep.  Too respectful but still horny?  Creep.  Broke but otherwise charming?  Creep.  Trying too hard? Creep.  There is no relational fark up that a guy can commit that is not punishable by fire.  I'm SOOOOO  glad to be married and not have to deal with picky biatches any more.  (Now I just have to focus on the one)


The respect you show for your wife is awe inspiring.
 
2013-02-06 11:34:54 AM  

plewis: I'm SOOOOO glad to be married and not have to deal with picky biatches any more. (Now I just have to focus on the one)


Any man who considers his wife to be a "picky biatch", probably isn't happily married.

Seven years of marriage.
Never used that word to describe my wife.
Never will.


...or maybe I read that wrong.
 
2013-02-06 11:39:58 AM  

ciberido: Tat'dGreaser: tinfoil-hat maggie: Heh, no. Try this guy attaches himself to two girls that walk into a bar, second dude end up engaging in conversation with first dude, girls make escape. Sorry just my 2 cents(not valid in Canada)

So dude number 1 was the creeper!?!? I like this mystery

I thought the butler was the creeper.


Actually, Rondo Hatton was 'The Creeper'
 
2013-02-06 11:44:27 AM  

Relatively Obscure: Just do like me and freeze in silent, nervous loserdom, then drink heavily and masturbate.


That, is so hot.
 
2013-02-06 11:45:59 AM  
Meh, the waitress one was always a mystery to me, don't even try to pick them up anymore...a buddy of mine gets waitresses all the time, he even picked up a hooters girl once...didn't think that was even possible.
 
2013-02-06 11:47:32 AM  

nickerj1: CtrlAltDestroy: I've thought about it but I don't have anyone that I can ask. I thought, for a split second, about asking anonymous for a critique but then realized how dangerous that would be. I do want to take some new pictutes soon. But I can't, for the life of me, look good in a picture. My looks are already iffy and this inability to look decent in a photo doesn't help. I might try to overhaul the profiles this weekend.

/Holy hell Fark's new comment system is not phone friendly.

There's your problem.  It is hard to get a girlfriend without female friends, pretty much impossible without any friends at all.  It gives you practice talking to girls.  It makes you more attractive to unknown females because they see you talking to females.  It tells everyone you aren't a creeper.  Female friends increase attractiveness exponentially.  Hot female friends increase attractiveness exponentially cubed.

If you're a hermit, you can change that by joining activity clubs.  Kickball, bocce, any local sporting stuff with young adults.  Volunteering is also huge.  Volunteer at whatever local thing to meet people.  Get off fark and go out and start doing stuff in your spare time to meet people.  Start hanging out with them, girls and guys alike.

Your objective should be: "Find guys and girls to have fun with and be friends with"
By virtue of doing that, you'll eventually come across a girl that's attracted to you.


Yeah, seriously... if you don't have any female friends, then you should completely put plans for dating aside and focus on getting more female friends -  and honestly focus on friends, not trying to date them.Find girls you're absolutely not attracted to, if that helps. Point is, you have to be comfortable and confident and used to talking to women as people, rather than targets.
 
2013-02-06 11:51:55 AM  

Mercury: Repo Man: SkunkWerks: Smackledorfer: women respond well to physically attractive, and poorly to ugly. Denying that is lying.

'Attractive' and 'Ugly' are subjective concepts.

I lie because I have different experiences than you, and I experience them differently.  Big shocker, I know.

Not completely. Find someone who would think John Merrick was attractive. Large surveys of humans show that there is a peak of the bell curve for what most of us find physically attractive. In the sense of aesthetics
My best friend has a crush on Tatum Channing. I think he's a butter face. I have a crush on Ryan Gosling. My friend thinks he's wonky eye and calls him "Male Paris". Taste is subjective and I highly doubt you look like John Merrick.




But my point, which I apparently didn't make well enough, is that what is pretty, and what is ugly is both subjective and objective. Studies have been done where infants too young to have absorbed any cultural bias were shown photos of human faces. They would look at faces generally considered attractive longer than they would at faces generally considered not attractive. This isn't just some arbitrary social construct. People who don't like this idea, because they have romantic idea about human nature, will refuse to accept it. But I mostly agree with this article: The Truth About Beauty.

"Just because swans mate for life, I don't think its that big a deal. First of all, if you're a swan, you're probably not going to find a swan that looks much better than the one you've got, so why not mate for life?" - Jack Handey
 
2013-02-06 11:52:06 AM  

ciberido: Serious Post on Serious Thread: ciberido: Serious Post on Serious Thread: The thrust of the article, is about INITIAL IMPRESSIONS that project a sense of 'creepiness'. The criticism of the article is that one finds a person unattractive you are never going to find out if they are 'creepy' or 'swell'. Your lazy comments communicate the obvious and unargued, by anyone, article included point that once you get to know some one, attractive or not, you may or may not find them creepy.

That's a "criticism" of the article in the same way "death panels!" is a criticism of Obamacare.

I'm sure that sounded terribly insightful in your head as you were typing it.


Insightful?  Not at all.  Point out that your argument was crap was about as insightful as pointing out that the ocean is wet.

I did think it was the teeniest bit witty, though.


Witty? Yeah, but no, not even the teeniest bit.
 
2013-02-06 11:53:36 AM  
As a guy who has recently struck out and expects to be put in the friend zone next time I see her, I'm getting a kick out of this thread.

For once in my life it would be nice if the woman I like and the woman I'm sleeping with were the same person.
 
2013-02-06 11:55:09 AM  

plewis: This just in:  Women can be picky assholes.  Not good at public speaking or talking to strangers?  Creep.  Too respectful but still horny?  Creep.  Broke but otherwise charming?  Creep.  Trying too hard? Creep.  There is no relational fark up that a guy can commit that is not punishable by fire.



What a sad, self-defeating attitude. Some guys truly think that being turned down by a woman is the worst thing that can possibly happen. The only reason you were interested in them in the first place is their potential for dating. Now that you know they are not interested in you for that, why do you care if they think you're creepy or not? Why do you care what they think about anything?
 
2013-02-06 11:56:42 AM  
never listen to a woman's advice on women.  seriously.  they are the worst.
 
2013-02-06 11:57:28 AM  

SkunkWerks: plewis: I'm SOOOOO glad to be married and not have to deal with picky biatches any more. (Now I just have to focus on the one)

Any man who considers his wife to be a "picky biatch", probably isn't happily married.


He means it in a good way.
 
2013-02-06 11:57:41 AM  

yapopo: never listen to a woman's advice on women. seriously. they are the worst.


Right. Because only men know what I want. Please tell me again what I want, I'm just too feeble minded to figure it out for myself.
 
2013-02-06 11:59:55 AM  

BMFPitt: When I was a hopeless single guy, I always hated when people said, "Be confident" as if it were some kind of useful advice.

That's kind of like a track coach saying, "Run faster."


I'll expand this a bit for those in your similar situation...

Be confident means...

1. Be confident in your wardrobe. Take a look at yourself in the mirror with your usual wardrobe on. Do you think girls like the way you dress? Do you think you personally dress well? Do you think you have too faded of clothes, or holes in your jeans. Are you happy with the way you dress? If not, do something about it until you are.
2. Be confident with your body. Drop down to your underwear and look at yourself in the mirror again. If you were a girl, would you want to have sex with you? If the answer is no, do something about it. Either start working out, or develop a better personality so she won't care as much about your looks.
3. Be confident with your mind. Think you are too stupid? You are... do something about it. Think girls are running away because you use too many big words, or talk incessentially about comic books and Star Wars? Do something about it. Now the trolls who can't find girls will say, "but I want to be myself". Well, that's why you are still single. Would you date a girl that constantly talked about My Little Pony, or had a room full of stuffed animals when she's older than 30? I'm not advocating changing who you are, but changing the presentation of who you are. -She can find out you are a closet nerd after she falls in Love with you. -You'll probably find out she's got some things she didn't want everyone knowing about as well.
4. Be confident with everything else. I can't cover all of the topics here, but between dress, fitness, and having something interesting to say without coming across as creepy/nerdy/whatever, there's not much more. If you have family issues you aren't happy with, do something about it... If you hate your job...  If you can't dance... Do something about it...

No girl wants a guy who whines about his problems and does nothing to fix them. That's what being confident is all about... being happy with who you are, and if you aren't, doing something about it rather than whining.
 
2013-02-06 12:02:57 PM  

Theaetetus: nickerj1: CtrlAltDestroy: I've thought about it but I don't have anyone that I can ask. I thought, for a split second, about asking anonymous for a critique but then realized how dangerous that would be. I do want to take some new pictutes soon. But I can't, for the life of me, look good in a picture. My looks are already iffy and this inability to look decent in a photo doesn't help. I might try to overhaul the profiles this weekend.

/Holy hell Fark's new comment system is not phone friendly.

There's your problem.  It is hard to get a girlfriend without female friends, pretty much impossible without any friends at all.  It gives you practice talking to girls.  It makes you more attractive to unknown females because they see you talking to females.  It tells everyone you aren't a creeper.  Female friends increase attractiveness exponentially.  Hot female friends increase attractiveness exponentially cubed.

If you're a hermit, you can change that by joining activity clubs.  Kickball, bocce, any local sporting stuff with young adults.  Volunteering is also huge.  Volunteer at whatever local thing to meet people.  Get off fark and go out and start doing stuff in your spare time to meet people.  Start hanging out with them, girls and guys alike.

Your objective should be: "Find guys and girls to have fun with and be friends with"
By virtue of doing that, you'll eventually come across a girl that's attracted to you.

Yeah, seriously... if you don't have any female friends, then you should completely put plans for dating aside and focus on getting more female friends -  and honestly focus on friends, not trying to date them.Find girls you're absolutely not attracted to, if that helps. Point is, you have to be comfortable and confident and used to talking to women as people, rather than targets.


this is a golden piece of advice.
 
Displayed 50 of 635 comments

First | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | » | Last | Show all

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


This thread is archived, and closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »






Report