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(Gawker)   If you're one of the millions of Americans planning on watching this year's Super Bowl then make sure that you're inside a Faraday cage and your tin foil hat is securely in place   (gawker.com) divider line 61
    More: Asinine, Americans, Super Bowl, illuminati, Madeleine Albright, Willow Smith, Puppy Bowl, Nick Denton, Thomas Paine  
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16415 clicks; posted to Main » on 02 Feb 2013 at 3:25 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



61 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2013-02-02 02:52:39 PM
If I want violent homoerotica, I'll google it.
 
2013-02-02 03:10:07 PM
It's Ke$ha, holding hands with Agent Cooper from Twin Peaks. They're laughing at you. But now you're Ke$ha. You're the Illuminati, and you're not laughing anymore. Your mouth is stretched back in a gaping, wordless bellow. You will swallow the world.

I think the grandest conspiracy is that Gawker made me laugh.  How deep does it go?!
 
2013-02-02 03:17:31 PM

cretinbob: If I want violent homoerotica, I'll google it.


Set up a webcam, maybe? I'd pay to see it, 'cuz I ain't watchin' no Super Bowl and no Foozball at my house.
 
2013-02-02 03:28:48 PM
You say that like I don't  live in a Faraday cage.  I'm not stupid.
 
2013-02-02 03:29:46 PM
upload.wikimedia.org

(whisper)I haven't invented a cage....yet(/whisper)
 
2013-02-02 03:30:31 PM
Of course the Superbowl is a massive mind control conspiracy. Why else do you think the Patriots suddenly started winning right after 9/11?
 
2013-02-02 03:31:39 PM
" ...our most halved of time-shows "

lol
 
2013-02-02 03:34:41 PM

Mad_Radhu: Of course the Superbowl is a massive mind control conspiracy. Why else do you think the Patriots suddenly started winning right after 9/11?


s3-ak.buzzfeed.com
 
2013-02-02 03:35:00 PM
Lamest halftime show ever. Beyonce? Come on. So many great bands out there could nail it. Lame. And on a side note, I'm betting no coaches, managers, owners, etc. get in today. None of them are really HoF and the backlog of actual players is just far too deep.
 
2013-02-02 03:35:46 PM
What the f*ck did I just not read?
 
2013-02-02 03:36:52 PM
What a Faraday cage may look like
s11.postimage.org
 
2013-02-02 03:37:03 PM
I'll take my chances

thatgrapejuice.net
 
2013-02-02 03:38:43 PM

A Shambling Mound: What the f*ck did I just not read?

 
2013-02-02 03:38:44 PM
i210.photobucket.com
 
2013-02-02 03:39:04 PM
I won't be watching the halftime show, so I will be safe. There is no way I would ever listen to Beyonce. Just hearing her bellow during promotional spots on TV, turned my stomach.
 
2013-02-02 03:39:49 PM
t0.gstatic.com
 
2013-02-02 03:46:05 PM
The Illuminati rabbit hole goes far deeper. Even Red Pandas are in on the conspiracy.

http://www.desmoinesregister.com/VideoNetwork/2134754404001/Red-Pand as -Pick-Super-Bowl-Winner?nclick_check=1

images.sodahead.com
OBEY!
 
2013-02-02 03:49:32 PM
Are there really members of the Illuminati !!?!?!

I thought it was all made up. Serious. How do I get in on a meeting?
 
2013-02-02 03:51:20 PM
"What does Big Helmet stand to gain from this performance?"


Big Helmet will stand at attention.
 
2013-02-02 03:52:08 PM
Someone at Gawker has been seriously hitting the booze.
 
2013-02-02 03:57:54 PM

Fluid: Someone at Gawker has been seriously hitting the booze.


If by "booze" you mean "acid," yeah.
 
2013-02-02 03:59:51 PM
It goes really deep.
Like in canada where the government will censor the U.S. channel and force its citizens to watch the canadian station instead.
You should see all those one frame images embedded in the canadian commercials.


/This message brought to you by Jacques Poutine, aka: Prime Minister Sweatervest.
 
2013-02-02 04:01:18 PM
We're through the looking glass here, people.

I think there actually is a conspiracy regarding alleged symbolism at the Olympics and other big sporting events, but it's about getting people obsessed with conspiracies to watch.
 
2013-02-02 04:01:21 PM

TV's Vinnie: The Illuminati rabbit hole goes far deeper. Even Red Pandas are in on the conspiracy.

http://www.desmoinesregister.com/VideoNetwork/2134754404001/Red-Pand as -Pick-Super-Bowl-Winner?nclick_check=1

[images.sodahead.com image 620x400]
OBEY!


Awww...who knew the Illuminati would be so darn cute?

Must...resist...
 
2013-02-02 04:05:47 PM
Can you see the fnords?
 
2013-02-02 04:08:29 PM
i291.photobucket.com

NOT MANDATORY
 
2013-02-02 04:11:24 PM
It's Ke$ha, holding hands with Agent Cooper from Twin Peaks. They're laughing at you. But now you're Ke$ha. You're the Illuminati, and you're not laughing anymore.

The no-armed man is working for them
www.wrongsideofparadise.com
He has hairy feet, and will betray you by standing up for their whores
 
2013-02-02 04:18:04 PM
I couldn't care less about bowling.
 
2013-02-02 04:19:49 PM
Illuminati Prince Skeet Ulrich lives in the hollowed-out torch of the Statue of Liberty, where he controls the weather.

I see...
 
2013-02-02 04:20:07 PM

b0rg9: "What does Big Helmet stand to gain from this performance?"


Big Helmet will stand at attention.


media.247sports.com
 
2013-02-02 04:22:55 PM

Mad_Radhu: Of course the Superbowl is a massive mind control conspiracy. Why else do you think the Patriots suddenly started winning right after 9/11?


Yeah and 10 years later they were in the super bowl again but this time they were beaten by a team from New York. Coincidence?

/I think not.
 
2013-02-02 04:24:27 PM

Fark Rye For Many Whores: It's Ke$ha, holding hands with Agent Cooper from Twin Peaks. They're laughing at you. But now you're Ke$ha. You're the Illuminati, and you're not laughing anymore.

The no-armed man is working for them
[www.wrongsideofparadise.com image 496x396]
He has hairy feet, and will betray you by standing up for their whores


Who are these whores?

/For research purposes of course
 
2013-02-02 04:26:49 PM
www.evolvefish.com

/approves
 
2013-02-02 04:27:16 PM

Fark Rye For Many Whores: It's Ke$ha, holding hands with Agent Cooper from Twin Peaks. They're laughing at you. But now you're Ke$ha. You're the Illuminati, and you're not laughing anymore.

The no-armed man is working for them
[www.wrongsideofparadise.com image 496x396]
He has hairy feet, and will betray you by standing up for their whores


The owls are not what they seem...

/That gum you like is going to come back in style...
 
2013-02-02 04:31:43 PM

Mad_Radhu: Of course the Superbowl is a massive mind control conspiracy. Why else do you think the Patriots suddenly started winning right after 9/11?


The Saints started winning after Katrina.
 
2013-02-02 04:36:40 PM

Head_Shot: Are there really members of the Illuminati !!?!?!

I thought it was all made up. Serious. How do I get in on a meeting?


It's invite-only, but I may be able to wrangle you an invitation.  Check your third eye for it.


www.chicagonow.com

Hopefully you don't have a problem following orders from either frogs OR cats.

/I've said too much.
 
2013-02-02 04:46:25 PM
freemasonry.bcy.ca
 
2013-02-02 04:48:51 PM

Madman drummers bummers: Fluid: Someone at Gawker has been seriously hitting the booze.

If by "booze" you mean "acid," yeah.


by 'acid' you mean 'meth'

and consequently, by 'meth' you mean 'bath salts'

/The cycle of gawker
 
2013-02-02 04:53:39 PM

badhatharry: Mad_Radhu: Of course the Superbowl is a massive mind control conspiracy. Why else do you think the Patriots suddenly started winning right after 9/11?

The Saints started winning after Katrina.


And Seattle started winning after the....O schmit! HEAD FOR THE SHELTER!
 
2013-02-02 05:23:55 PM

jaytkay: I'll take my chances


ill take your chance and mine! /hot
 
2013-02-02 05:35:40 PM
i.imgur.com
 
2013-02-02 05:37:33 PM

NateAsbestos: Fark Rye For Many Whores: www.wrongsideofparadise.com

Who are these whores?

/For research purposes of course


Lara Flynn Boyle and Sherilyn Fenn and Mädchen Amick
 
2013-02-02 05:42:32 PM
i86.photobucket.com
 
2013-02-02 06:04:58 PM
"That's the subliminal message that will be spreading worldwide because everyone watches the Super Bowl."

Someone seems to vastly overestimate the popularity of American football.
 
2013-02-02 06:20:51 PM

Fark Rye For Many Whores: NateAsbestos: Fark Rye For Many Whores: [www.wrongsideofparadise.com image 496x396]

Who are these whores?

/For research purposes of course

Lara Flynn Boyle and Sherilyn Fenn and Mädchen Amick


Oh, Sherilyn....my biggest missed chance...
 
2013-02-02 07:41:15 PM
No fly zone over superbowl: Pilots have even been warned that if they enter the restricted area over New Orleans their aircraft could be targeted by missiles.
 
2013-02-02 07:46:08 PM

Smirky the Wonder Chimp: Head_Shot


Well, I'm already under the control of 3 cats...what can a stupid frog do to me? YAAAAARRRRRRG!11
 
2013-02-02 09:12:54 PM
I don't watch football, and don't have any plans to watch the super bowl. Does that mean that jack-booted paratroopers are going to rappel out of helicopters and haul me aw.... ****CARRIER LOST****
 
2013-02-02 09:46:58 PM
I researched this on YouTube, trust me.
 
2013-02-02 09:54:13 PM

Novart: I researched this on YouTube, trust me.


You didn't have to go to all that trouble, the fact that you're from the Internet ought to be good enough for anybody.
 
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