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(Gizmodo)   How to make mathematically perfect nachos just in time for the Super Bowl   (gizmodo.com) divider line 40
    More: Spiffy, Super Bowl, CAD, kosher salt, tortillas  
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4670 clicks; posted to Geek » on 02 Feb 2013 at 1:30 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



40 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2013-02-02 11:15:11 AM  
Too bad those that'd bother to do this won't get to share them with anyone.

/because OCD types have no friends
//How many letters are in my post?  Go on, count them
 
2013-02-02 11:22:26 AM  
Ah, see, but the fun is in the IMPERFECTIONS.
 
2013-02-02 11:52:41 AM  

Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: Ah, see, but the fun is in the IMPERFECTIONS.


And double dipping when no one is watching.
 
2013-02-02 12:43:09 PM  

Lt. Cheese Weasel: And double dipping when no one is watching.


SHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! WE CAN'T LET THE SECRET OUT
 
2013-02-02 01:31:20 PM  
That's an awful lot of work for a gut bomb.
 
2013-02-02 01:44:41 PM  
That's a lot of work for something that they already make and sell at the grocery store. Scoops? By... Totinos maybe?
 
2013-02-02 01:46:27 PM  
What you really want for mathematically superior food is Flex Mex.
http://m.youtube.com/#/watch?v=GTwrVAbV56o&desktop_uri=%2Fwatch%3Fv%3D GTwrVAbV56o
 
2013-02-02 01:48:32 PM  

Doctor Funfrock: That's a lot of work for something that they already make and sell at the grocery store. Scoops? By... Totinos maybe?


Tostitos (tm) Scoops (tm).  What you do is, right, you scoop up whatever sh*t you want on your chip with 'em.  Problem solved.
 
2013-02-02 01:51:24 PM  
It looks good, but that's way more effort than I want to put into nachos.
 
2013-02-02 01:55:57 PM  
Came for fibonachos, left disappointed.
 
2013-02-02 01:57:17 PM  
Oh I don't know. Could be fun for a not-too-big party. The kind where the wives are invited.
 
2013-02-02 02:09:34 PM  
Those look like the edges would hurt my mouth when I tried to bite them. But then again, my mouth is very sensitive.
 
2013-02-02 02:13:14 PM  
Mathematical perfection requires a blender.
 
2013-02-02 02:16:32 PM  
Nachos are not meant to be a mathematicallly perfect food.
 
2013-02-02 02:16:55 PM  

Araltaln: Came for fibonachos, left disappointed.


media.tumblr.com
 
2013-02-02 02:26:46 PM  
img.gawkerassets.com

Your teeth are crooked and there's a hair on that nacho.
 
2013-02-02 02:47:32 PM  
The great mathematicians spent 15 bucks and for a mini muffin tin to reinvent the tostitos scoop in a half assed way that works less well looks like it came straight out of a trailer park boys skit and spills more nacho goop while wasting most of their tortillas they use as a base for their invention Then they quantified pretty much nothing on the way towards declaring their new nachos the perfect solutiont the problem they invented. Even without quantified results they declared their solution to perfect mathematically despite its solving a problem with eating nachos that every drunk and cheese stained snacker from here to Austraila and back has solved by simply eating the nachos in front of them. Then our nacho math wizards managed to get paid for their research and developmnt by publishing it in gizmodo.

I gotta tell ya,, there is room near the top of governmental think tanks for these guys. They could pretty much guide congress with their skills.
 
2013-02-02 02:49:56 PM  

mikaloyd: The great mathematicians spent 15 bucks and for a mini muffin tin to reinvent the tostitos scoop in a half assed way that works less well looks like it came straight out of a trailer park boys skit and spills more nacho goop while wasting most of their tortillas they use as a base for their invention Then they quantified pretty much nothing on the way towards declaring their new nachos the perfect solutiont the problem they invented. Even without quantified results they declared their solution to perfect mathematically despite its solving a problem with eating nachos that every drunk and cheese stained snacker from here to Austraila and back has solved by simply eating the nachos in front of them. Then our nacho math wizards managed to get paid for their research and developmnt by publishing it in gizmodo.

I gotta tell ya,, there is room near the top of governmental think tanks for these guys. They could pretty much guide congress with their skills.


It's Gizmodo. I think they actually try to come up with ridiculous crap just to drive page views.
 
2013-02-02 03:15:18 PM  
this is a trap. you are gay if you make these
 
2013-02-02 03:28:26 PM  
I thought the whole point of nachos is they're really easy and fast to make?  Why would you want to do this much work when you can just evenly spread them, use too much cheese so there's some left to scoop up with the chips you missed, and have them assembled and cooked in under five minutes?
 
2013-02-02 04:06:00 PM  
If you're sober enough to care about the quality of nachos beyond "Yuck! These taste like shiat!" then you're too sober for nachos.
 
2013-02-02 04:15:51 PM  

mikaloyd: The great mathematicians spent 15 bucks and for a mini muffin tin to reinvent the tostitos scoop


Because Tostitos taste like shiat? (Hint of Lime or whatever it's called excepted.)

but, then, lots of people eat at McDonald's.
 
2013-02-02 04:19:50 PM  

man metaphysical: this is a trap. you are gay if you make these


Gay Nachos?

New Punk Band name or Twitter handle?
 
2013-02-02 04:30:28 PM  
No thanks.

I'll stick to my 4-hour crock-pot simmered queso dip.

/no, you can't have the recipe
 
2013-02-02 04:42:58 PM  
What kind of cheese is on those nachos?
 
2013-02-02 04:55:35 PM  

foo monkey: What kind of cheese is on those nachos?


That nacho cheese! That nacho cheese!
 
2013-02-02 07:01:09 PM  
i.imgur.com
 
2013-02-02 07:09:56 PM  

Araltaln: Came for fibonachos, left disappointed.


Just for you.
worstprofessorever.com
 
2013-02-02 07:48:51 PM  
Next step: custom chip.

EPIC FAIL
 
2013-02-02 08:06:15 PM  
I boo the nacho as his father.
 
2013-02-02 09:42:08 PM  
Buy these and skip the stupid custom chip steps.
www.fritolay.com
 
2013-02-02 10:00:52 PM  
Saw the article. Immediately went to the store to buy Tostitos Scoops, hot salsa, jalapenos and shredded cheese. Made excellent non-mathematically perfect nachos for under $10 and in about four minutes. And I only took up about a quarter of the things I bought so I'll have plenty for tomorrow's Super Bowl.

/whole article probably paid for by Tostitos
//brilliant
 
2013-02-02 10:08:13 PM  
Nothing like a pointed, jagged caltrop chip to crunch down on.
 
2013-02-02 10:28:23 PM  

lordargent: [img.gawkerassets.com image 640x360]

Your teeth are crooked and there's a hair on that nacho.


I don't think that's a hair, but a crease or crack in the chip. However, that chip looks like a leaky vajayjay. It's just oozing out all over him.
 
2013-02-02 11:34:33 PM  
Spend time creating a "mathematically prefect" chip with CAD software.

i1.kym-cdn.com

Use starfish cookie cutter instead
 
2013-02-03 01:48:05 AM  
Ah, another Gawker failure.

/damned site name text is too small on mobile Fark
 
2013-02-03 05:05:18 AM  

lasercannon: Buy these and skip the stupid custom chip steps.
[www.fritolay.com image 215x314]



Exactly.

When I'm too drunk to process actual cooking, I drop a tablespoon of salsa onto a scoop with some diced Fresno peppers and some green chilli Cholula and some cheddar cheese. Put it on a baking sheet for 8 mins on 400degree heat and in 5 mins you have lazy drunk chow
 
2013-02-03 07:15:01 AM  
That's very wasteful. You should be able to get at least two, maybe three out of each tortilla.
 
2013-02-03 07:15:52 AM  
I give up. fark ate the pic
 
2013-02-03 09:14:38 AM  
Quick & good poor man's nachos

dump a Wendy's chili over a plateful of tortilla chips
cover with cheese, lettuce, salsa, sour cream, whatever
lather, rinse, repeat
 
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