FARK.com: (7568969) Man finds whale vomit worth £100,000. Must've tried eating the Jonas brothers

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		Man finds whale vomit worth £100,000. Must've tried eating the Jonas brothers (itn.co.uk)		47
		More: Interesting, sea salt

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7878 clicks; posted to Main » on 01 Feb 2013 at 10:17 AM | Favorite | share:

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RexTalionis		2013-02-01 09:21:47 AM

Precious ambergris!

pute kisses like a man		2013-02-01 10:19:14 AM

so, i'm reading moby dick right now... and is spermacetti still valuable?

/ i never realized that the sperm whale was so named because of the likeness of that substance to sperm.

Swoop1809		2013-02-01 10:19:20 AM

Futurama did it

hdhale		2013-02-01 10:20:27 AM

Man finds whale vomit worth £100,000. Must've tried ~~eating~~ listening the Jonas brothers

cgraves67		2013-02-01 10:21:04 AM

Which is why returning a beached whale to the ocean is like throwing a gold nugget back into a river.

/I keed
//mostly

MadSkillz		2013-02-01 10:22:41 AM

This is Murca pls use dollars

Khellendros		2013-02-01 10:22:57 AM

"Who smells like freaking porpoise hork?"

VRaptor117		2013-02-01 10:23:13 AM

RexTalionis: [images4.wikia.nocookie.net image 842x697]
Precious ambergris!

Done in one.

/whale biologist

HMS_Blinkin		2013-02-01 10:26:44 AM

RexTalionis: [images4.wikia.nocookie.net image 842x697]
Precious ambergris!

Glad to see Futurama was covered right away in the Boobies.

gadian		2013-02-01 10:28:05 AM

Gah. I can't imagine what would motivate someone to pick up a smelly rock and take it home just because it was smelly. Some fetish perhaps?

No Time To Explain		2013-02-01 10:28:53 AM

What is like to know is how it came to be that the stuff found its way into perfume?

/"hey, you know what might sell? getting whale puke and putting it in perfume then sell it to rich folks... Yeah, they'll buy anything if you say it's fancy"

Kristoph57		2013-02-01 10:31:28 AM

gadian: Gah. I can't imagine what would motivate someone to pick up a smelly rock and take it home just because it was smelly. Some fetish perhaps?

I have a fetish for $158,000, so to the smelly rocks I go!

Dr Dreidel		2013-02-01 10:31:43 AM

RexTalionis: [images4.wikia.nocookie.net image 842x697]
Precious ambergris!

Precious hamburgers?

Keeve		2013-02-01 10:35:45 AM

Better get Encyclopedia Brown on the case.

abhorrent1		2013-02-01 10:37:49 AM

I love the dog at the end.

"diggin a hole, diggin a hole, diggin a hole, diggin a hole"

megarian		2013-02-01 10:38:32 AM

Everyone laughed and ostracized me... Called me whale-vom-hoarder...made fun of the freezers of whale gold...

I'M RICH!!!!!

/can't wait until baby adrenal glands are valuable
//I'll put everyone through college

Harry Freakstorm		2013-02-01 10:38:37 AM

Did it happen to barf up an ugly swimsuit?

blatz514		2013-02-01 10:40:55 AM

Hey! Look at that, auto-play! You deserve this subby.

/NSFLunch

Smeggy Smurf		2013-02-01 10:44:39 AM

sasbazooka		2013-02-01 10:48:40 AM

FTFV: So if you smell something pungent on a beach in the future, make sure you pick it up.

?

hitlersbrain		2013-02-01 10:50:34 AM

And for some reason we can't make this in a lab?

jaybeezey		2013-02-01 10:56:29 AM

Step1) Catch Whale
Step2) Gag Whale with Giant Toothbrush
Step3) Profit!

Abe Vigoda's Ghost		2013-02-01 11:07:06 AM

hitlersbrain: And for some reason we can't make this in a lab?

The whale tank takes up too much space.

jbrooks544		2013-02-01 11:12:04 AM

Fyi, ambergris is not vomit . It is formed in the intestines of sperm whales, and is either pooped out or kills the whale and is released post mortem.

Odd Bird		2013-02-01 11:12:07 AM

Abe Vigoda's Ghost: hitlersbrain: And for some reason we can't make this in a lab?

The whale tank takes up too much space.

If they can put one in a Bird of Prey they can damn well put one in a lab.

/transparent aluminum, how does it work?
//dnrta

KingKauff		2013-02-01 11:26:15 AM

Raise the sail off the stage, I'm stuck on a sandbar
And the seagulls are wondering what's up

As the waves peel like a sheet that's not tucked in
Washing in all that white foam
What is that stuff anyway?
It's the spit of a whale and the waves they don't care
They were born out at sea
And they live to crash

/seemed somewhat appropriate
//obscure?

splat the whale		2013-02-01 11:32:00 AM

Whale vomit, you say... hmmmm...

TwistedFark		2013-02-01 11:33:42 AM

I think someone missplaced a decimal point there. Unless he found a 300 lb rock of ambergris, that stuff only sells for about 10 grand (US) for a kilogram. I know I said "only 10 grand/kg" but gold is worth about 50 grand a kg as a point of reference and ambergris is not worth more than gold.

Kuta		2013-02-01 11:36:55 AM

The whiteness of confusion
Is unfolding from my mind
I stare around in wonder
Have I left my life behind?
I catch the scent of ambergris
And turn my head, surprised
My gaze is caught and held and I
Am helpless...mesmerized

pxlboy		2013-02-01 11:52:40 AM

RexTalionis: [images4.wikia.nocookie.net image 842x697]
Precious ambergris!

This.

TofuTheAlmighty		2013-02-01 12:05:27 PM

Fantastic headline.

zarberg		2013-02-01 12:05:38 PM

I first learned about ambergris from this book ...

Which later led me to start playing Sid Meier's Pirates!

PictsieGirl		2013-02-01 12:16:14 PM

Odd Bird: Abe Vigoda's Ghost: hitlersbrain: And for some reason we can't make this in a lab?

The whale tank takes up too much space.

If they can put one in a Bird of Prey they can damn well put one in a lab.

/transparent aluminum, how does it work?
//dnrta

And now I will faithfully recite the entire movie in my head, thank you.
No sarcasm, I am now blissfully avoiding all work :)

/A keyboard? How quaint.

BTing		2013-02-01 12:17:33 PM

TwistedFark: I think someone missplaced a decimal point there. Unless he found a 300 lb rock of ambergris, that stuff only sells for about 10 grand (US) for a kilogram. I know I said "only 10 grand/kg" but gold is worth about 50 grand a kg as a point of reference and ambergris is not worth more than gold.

Based on your pricing...
10,000 dollars for a kilogram
6,000 pounds for a kilogram
100,000 pounds of ambergris
16 2/3 kilograms
36 lbs, not 300.

FWIW, I saw up to $20/gram

/were you the one that misplaced the decimal point?

TwistedFark		2013-02-01 12:25:13 PM

BTing: TwistedFark: I think someone missplaced a decimal point there. Unless he found a 300 lb rock of ambergris, that stuff only sells for about 10 grand (US) for a kilogram. I know I said "only 10 grand/kg" but gold is worth about 50 grand a kg as a point of reference and ambergris is not worth more than gold.

Based on your pricing...
10,000 dollars for a kilogram
6,000 pounds for a kilogram
100,000 pounds of ambergris
16 2/3 kilograms
36 lbs, not 300.

FWIW, I saw up to $20/gram

/were you the one that misplaced the decimal point?

No, I would be the guy who didn't give enough of a fark to convert kilograms to pounds or dollars to pounds (of the other variety).

Glad you found your calling.

h2oincfs		2013-02-01 12:27:04 PM

Keeve: Better get Encyclopedia Brown on the case.

my first thought, as well.

BTing		2013-02-01 12:41:29 PM

TwistedFark: BTing: TwistedFark: I think someone missplaced a decimal point there...

No, I would be the guy who didn't give enough of a fark to convert kilograms to pounds or dollars to pounds (of the other variety).

Glad you found your calling.

So I don't know if "the guy" was me or not, so I am going to retry my math.

$ = US Dollars L = British Pounds lb = Pound as a measure of weight.

The guy found a "L100,000" amount of ambergris.
You state ambergris is worth $10,000/kg.

L100,000 = $158,210
$158,210 / $10,000/kg = 15.8 kg
15.8 kg = 34.8 lbs

What am I missing?

BTing		2013-02-01 12:42:36 PM

Ignore me. I am an idiot having a bad day.

zarberg		2013-02-01 12:44:17 PM

BTing: Ignore me. I am an idiot having a bad day.

Around here I call that "days ending in 'Y'"

ciberido		2013-02-01 01:04:04 PM

No Time To Explain: What is like to know is how it came to be that the stuff found its way into perfume?

/"hey, you know what might sell? getting whale puke and putting it in perfume then sell it to rich folks... Yeah, they'll buy anything if you say it's fancy"

You could also make a delicious confectionery with it. Start with choicest juicy chunks of fresh Cornish ram's bladder, empty them, steam them, flavour them with sesame seeds whip into a fondue. Then the garnish, of course.

MythDragon		2013-02-01 01:19:09 PM

Dr Dreidel: RexTalionis: [images4.wikia.nocookie.net image 842x697]
Precious ambergris!

Precious hamburgers?

<I>NOW</i> we're done.

MythDragon		2013-02-01 01:20:19 PM

MythDragon: Dr Dreidel: RexTalionis: [images4.wikia.nocookie.net image 842x697]
Precious ambergris!

Precious hamburgers?

<I>NOW</i> we're done.

Goddamn you new ~~Fark~~ HTML layout

No Time To Explain		2013-02-01 02:05:32 PM

Smeggy Smurf: No Time To Explain: What is like to know is how it came to be that the stuff found its way into perfume?

/"hey, you know what might sell? getting whale puke and putting it in perfume then sell it to rich folks... Yeah, they'll buy anything if you say it's fancy"

And i was thinking of that too

/but then again, I'm not rich
//time to crap in a can, let it stew for a year or two then see if i can mix it into cheap wal mart perfume and sell it for thousands