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(Slate)   How you lose your virginity may scar you for life   (slate.com) divider line 67
    More: PSA  
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22547 clicks; posted to Main » on 01 Feb 2013 at 12:16 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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Archived thread
2013-01-31 11:46:51 PM
18 votes:
This may explain why I've spent my entire life searching for that one special someone who wants to make out in the back row of a theater during Naked Gun and then engage in a seconds-long encounter in a half-lit parking garage in the front seat of a white Ford escort owned by someone's mother. Forever alone. Forever. Alone.
2013-02-01 12:21:32 AM
7 votes:
Nice find, subby.  Most farkers could use this information when they finally lose their virginities.
2013-01-31 09:57:08 PM
6 votes:
mojoimage.com
2013-02-01 01:44:28 AM
5 votes:
When I was 17, me and this cute cheerleader chick who was in my English class got together when her parents were gone to watch a "Ren and Stimpy" marathon that I had on tape. With in a short period of time, it was my first time. However, we were so caught up in the moment that we let Ren and Stimpy play on while we got it on. At one point in time I was hitting it doggy style in rythm with the song Happy Happy Joy Joy (to be honest I sang along under my breath at one point). I think this kinda scarred me for the rest of my life, but who knows... I know csb and such.
2013-02-01 01:58:09 PM
3 votes:
No scars my first time, it was magical. I'd just moved to London, and I saw her. To this day the most beautiful, alluring, sexy woman I have ever seen. The epitomy of femininity. I met her in a club down in old Soho, where they drink Champagne that tastes just like Cherry Cola. She walked up to me and asked me to dance. I don't remember anything after that, and the next morning my butt hurt.
2013-02-01 06:08:48 AM
3 votes:
In the car, lunchtime at high school. She kept saying it was no big deal if we skipped fifth period English and did it again. I said, "for me it's not, but you're the teacher!"
2013-02-01 02:42:43 AM
3 votes:

Gyrfalcon: tinfoil-hat maggie: Wyalt Derp: Especially if vagina dentata are involved.

Yes, know you know my dark secret : )

Wait a minute...if vagina dentata "are" involved...is it there are more than one vagina or more than one dentatas? Or both?


Here's a little song that could help : )
www.justsomebroad.com
/Wut?
2013-02-01 12:45:29 AM
3 votes:
FTA: "The study, conducted by two psychology professors at the Universities of Mississippi and Tennessee, purports to demonstrate that the way you lose your virginity "is so salient that it is related to future sexual satisfaction and functioning."

So, did their study revolve around "daddy says I'm the best" and "squeal like a pig"?
2013-02-01 12:32:27 AM
3 votes:
Remember my first time? I can barely remember the last time with my wife.
2013-02-01 04:30:08 PM
2 votes:
This thread is an abomination. I have read every single post and FARK IS NOT YOUR PERSONAL EROTICA SITE. Also, could you ask be a little more detailed, I haven't quite finished yet.
2013-02-01 07:53:43 AM
2 votes:

mariner314: After seeing Scream 2 in the theater and then at her place. It was weird and had issues getting it going. Found out I'm good at going down however.

/later learned I usually need to ease in a new partner
//girthy


How YOU doin?

/WIE?
//EIP
2013-02-01 01:59:20 AM
2 votes:
The first time I had sex I was really scared................I was all alone.
cps-static.rovicorp.com
2013-02-01 01:42:21 AM
2 votes:

traylor: thorthor: My first time in the back seat of moms toyota corolla,

Hey, you and me have something in common!


You both lost your virginity in the back seat of his moms Toyota Carolla?
2013-02-01 01:25:26 AM
2 votes:
Lost mine to a Korean prostitute.  Still have a thing for Asians so this might be true.
2013-02-01 01:18:25 AM
2 votes:
I lost mine having sex and I'm okay with that...
2013-02-01 01:16:23 AM
2 votes:
... Like in the back of a Volkswagon?
2013-02-01 12:57:16 AM
2 votes:
If your sex story starts with: "Look at my horse, my horse is amazing, give it a lick... Mmmmm, it tastes just like raisins!" then there is no helping you from that trauma.
2013-02-01 12:52:29 AM
2 votes:

FizixJunkee: Nice find, subby.  Most farkers could use this information when they finally lose their virginities.


How many does one usually have?

/P.S. Your vagina's in the sink
2013-02-01 12:42:48 AM
2 votes:
So don't lose your virginity. Got it.

Lost mine of the floor of the girl's mom's apartment. MTV was playing, appropriately, Peter Gabriel's "Big Time" in the background. It was clumsy and awkward (she had no idea I was a virgin) but it certainly didn't "scar" me.

♫I'm on my way I'm making it♫
2013-02-01 12:34:25 AM
2 votes:

Anne.Uumellmahaye: Hubby punched my V card, so I suppose I'll never know the difference.


Same here. Ten years later we're still having sex so I guess i'll be ok.

/as soon as he unchains me
2013-02-01 12:25:11 AM
2 votes:
It definitely scarred me for life: I was completely pissed and fell over a timber fence, cutting the bejesus out of my knee. The scar's still there. I had meat falling out of me quite a bit that night.
2013-02-01 12:20:13 AM
2 votes:
Well, luckily I'm protected by not having a strong enough sex drive to overcome my natural hatred and distrust of other people. I'm sure dying without getting laid will in no way have negative repercussions in my life.
2013-02-01 12:17:53 AM
2 votes:
Well, this thread should be entertaining.
2013-01-31 11:42:26 PM
2 votes:
Only if you do it right.
2013-02-01 01:56:40 PM
1 votes:

NASAM: LibertyHiller: Jack's Smirking Revenge: TenJed_77: enderthexenocide: if i ever lose my virginity, i'll certainly let you guys know.

i turn 34 this year, and at the rate i'm going, i'll probably lose it to my future mail order bride.  women in the united states apparently want nothing to do with me, but maybe a nice woman from the ukraine might take a chance with me.

Don't buy anything you can't test drive.

Exactly.  If it flies, floats or farks, rent, don't buy.

/2 spaces after a period
//screw your precious bits - there's a good reason why
///Grammar Nazi in the old style
////yay slashies!

Hate to burst your bubble...

http://www.slate.com/articles/technology/technology/2011/01/space_in va ders.html?wpisrc=most_viral

Whatever.  It's Slate.  Slate is wrong about, well, just about everything.

/Two Spaces!
//Single space is for savages.


Thank you for saying what I was going to say.  Some of us like to be able to look at a paragraph and know at a glance where a period denotes the end of a sentence, the end of an abbreviation, or something else.  It helps break up the wall of text.

Also, that precious Slate author seems to have stashed his sense of irony with those extra spaces he despises.  Two paragraphs after writing, "Can I let you in on a secret? Typing two spaces after a period is totally, completely, utterly, and inarguably wrong," he wrote, "What galls me about two-spacers isn't just their numbers. It's their certainty that they're right."  He sounds like the sort of uptight person who lost his virginity in an arranged marriage.
2013-02-01 10:21:05 AM
1 votes:

nonzero: Hell, the last redhead thread was a ginger sausage fest.



I was okay with that one.  Farkettes need something to rub one out to every once in a while.
2013-02-01 10:20:56 AM
1 votes:
Well, my first time has left me unable to finish unless my father is banging on the wall yelling at us to "keep it down in there!".

No, not really.
2013-02-01 09:56:42 AM
1 votes:
It certianly scarred me.

Everytime I see a high-school gym coach I get really nervious, and start to sweat. I also get a half-chub for some reason.
2013-02-01 09:23:51 AM
1 votes:
This is not a bookmark.  Seriously, it's not.  This thread had so much potential.  Instead it's turned into a catalog of whiny biatching.
2013-02-01 08:58:53 AM
1 votes:
if i ever lose my virginity, i'll certainly let you guys know.

i turn 34 this year, and at the rate i'm going, i'll probably lose it to my future mail order bride.  women in the united states apparently want nothing to do with me, but maybe a nice woman from the ukraine might take a chance with me.
2013-02-01 08:00:50 AM
1 votes:
i really should have done it with my first love.  now i think about her every day.

but she won't talk to me cause she thinks i'm gay
2013-02-01 07:23:48 AM
1 votes:

aaronius: Genevieve Marie: cuzsis: It's funny people are complaining about the study having parameters. All studies do. And not every person is a fit for every study. If you tried to do that, there'd be all kinds of problems (funding for your exceedingly large participant base comes to mind quickly).

I just honestly can't see the value of a study on long term sexual satisfaction as related to the loss of virginity that only covers very young people who haven't had much time to enter into other relationships.

Unfortunately, it's not exactly easy to do a study of people like you're describing.  By definition, it would take years to come to any sort of conclusion, as you would have to follow the same people for years.  But you know that, I'm sure.


If only people had some sort of number, which could identify the place they currently resided, in a way to differentiate one from another. Then, if one needed to contact them, you could send a letter to them, using that number to identify them specifically as the recipient. Of course, there would need to be a service to deliver such letters, because delivering them yourself would be defeating the purpose and as you said, not easy.

Still, one can dream.
2013-02-01 06:10:41 AM
1 votes:

Rik01: Studies done since the 60's have confirmed that your first sexual encounter actually can, to a major degree, 'set' your sexual tastes.


the only thing that correlates my first time and my sexual tastes would be the gender of my sexual partner...

For whatever reason, THIS had a more profound impact on my tastes than my first time:

cdn.chud.com


To this day i still have a thing for white cotton panties, white socks, and a great ass...
2013-02-01 05:07:57 AM
1 votes:

swingbozo: FFS, TWO SPACES AFTER A PERIOD ARE AN ABOMINATION. Enough said.


Talk about your pent up frustrations...
2013-02-01 04:55:42 AM
1 votes:
After I finally haggled her down to twenty dollars it was the finest 5 minutes of my life spent on card board boxes behind a gas station. I can't believe it's been a week ago already.
2013-02-01 04:12:55 AM
1 votes:
I wouldn't say scarred, but I did learn a lesson about kissing and telling.  I was 22, she was 25, it was the floor of her dorm room when I was up visiting.  After it happened and I returned home, I announced "I got laid, I got laid, I got laid, yaaaaaaaay!" to our mutual friends.  At that point she kicked me to the curb and ended up hooking up with someone else and I had to see them happily together two months later at a party.

So needless to say, I now keep my interpersonal relationship information to myself.
2013-02-01 03:42:09 AM
1 votes:
If you're scarred for life, you should probably have agreed on a safe word, before you started
2013-02-01 03:39:02 AM
1 votes:

Peki: /the fact that I'm bi, like to be submissive, and have a good amount of kink means I'm normal. Right?


That or it means your profile just got viewed by almost every guy here.
2013-02-01 03:32:11 AM
1 votes:

Bob Down: Remember my first time? I can barely remember the last time with my wife.


Funny, I do.
2013-02-01 02:28:09 AM
1 votes:
you people need to make your stories longer. I'm trying to fap over here!!!
2013-02-01 02:11:50 AM
1 votes:

tinfoil-hat maggie: Wyalt Derp: Especially if vagina dentata are involved.

Yes, know you know my dark secret : )


*gasp*

well that......bites
2013-02-01 01:57:45 AM
1 votes:

spman: traylor: thorthor: My first time in the back seat of moms toyota corolla,

Hey, you and me have something in common!

You both lost your virginity in the back seat of his moms Toyota Carolla?



Yep. There was plenty of space in it!

/no, not in the car
2013-02-01 01:56:41 AM
1 votes:

jdmac: When I was 17, me and this cute cheerleader chick who was in my English class got together when her parents were gone to watch a "Ren and Stimpy" marathon that I had on tape. With in a short period of time, it was my first time. However, we were so caught up in the moment that we let Ren and Stimpy play on while we got it on. At one point in time I was hitting it doggy style in rythm with the song Happy Happy Joy Joy (to be honest I sang along under my breath at one point). I think this kinda scarred me for the rest of my life, but who knows... I know csb and such.


It wasn't my first time, but I've sung Happy Happy Joy Joy during sex too. She laughed, eventually I ended up marrying her.
2013-02-01 01:46:45 AM
1 votes:
urod.ru
2013-02-01 01:35:06 AM
1 votes:

Repo Man: rfenster: Cool, I'll keep this in mind in case I ever get lucky.

/Gotta happen one of these days.
//Doesn't it?
///Anyone want to take 46 year old out for a test drive?

Look on the bright side - no chance of STDs.


I heard you could git those from the public turlit!!!
2013-02-01 01:32:32 AM
1 votes:

sxacho: I had a friend who finally screwed some fat chick in his senior year in high school. His reaction, "I'm glad I got that over with". He later joined the coast guard, not that there's anything wrong with that.


Later, he was thrown out of the Coast Guard for riding manatees.
2013-02-01 01:29:32 AM
1 votes:

Fark Rye For Many Whores: It's ok, he makes his own Real Dolls.


Kwame?
2013-02-01 01:28:20 AM
1 votes:
i called her Esmerelda but then she turned rotten!

they all go rotten, eventually :(


t3.gstatic.com
2013-02-01 01:27:28 AM
1 votes:
I had a friend who finally screwed some fat chick in his senior year in high school. His reaction, "I'm glad I got that over with". He later joined the coast guard, not that there's anything wrong with that.
2013-02-01 01:25:12 AM
1 votes:
I remember too many first times I get them confused.
2013-02-01 01:19:36 AM
1 votes:
1.bp.blogspot.com
2013-02-01 01:08:51 AM
1 votes:
With my cousin...
2013-02-01 01:06:25 AM
1 votes:
i finally had an orgasm, and my doctor told me it was the wrong kind.
2013-02-01 12:56:39 AM
1 votes:

SpdrJay: And scars may make you a virgin for life.....
.
.
edwardjamesolmos.jpg


www.pajiba.com
It's ok, he makes his own Real Dolls.
2013-02-01 12:53:33 AM
1 votes:
Tell it to my uncle subby.
2013-02-01 12:50:48 AM
1 votes:

Fano: FTA: "The study, conducted by two psychology professors at the Universities of Mississippi and Tennessee, purports to demonstrate that the way you lose your virginity "is so salient that it is related to future sexual satisfaction and functioning."

So, did their study revolve around "daddy says I'm the best" and "squeal like a pig"?


Squeal like a pig is Georgia, sorry bud.
2013-02-01 12:40:02 AM
1 votes:
It was only scarring due to vanilla ice playing on the radio and when her dad got up to use the bathroom

"If it's my mom she'll come see why my light is still on.'

"uhhh........."
2013-02-01 12:39:58 AM
1 votes:

rfenster: Cool, I'll keep this in mind in case I ever get lucky.

/Gotta happen one of these days.
//Doesn't it?
///Anyone want to take 46 year old out for a test drive?


Holy shiat find a farking Hooker before you explode or go on a killing spree.

/just advice
//just trying to help
2013-02-01 12:37:14 AM
1 votes:

Coelacanth: Back in 1974, I lost my cherry to my first high school sweetheart while my second high school sweetheart moped around downstairs because we didn't have television (my family just moved to the mountains and we couldn't afford Stone age cable back then).

I developed a guilt trip about that until a few years ago, I ran across the second sweetheart on Facebook. I asked her if she was still pissed off about me and number one. She told me that it ruined her life (she went and married another guy who promptly got himself killed on a motorcycle).

My guilt trip is now an around-the-world cruise.


YOu should have requested a threesome, then you'd be off the hook when she refused.
2013-02-01 12:34:53 AM
1 votes:
I don't see how virginity applies here.  Every woman I've been with having a vagina size Jenna Jameson or below has been scared for life, and left with future sexual experiences as follows:

www.midlifegamer.net
2013-02-01 12:34:10 AM
1 votes:
I lost it with the Penthouse July 1984 issue.
2013-02-01 12:33:21 AM
1 votes:
Back in 1974, I lost my cherry to my first high school sweetheart while my second high school sweetheart moped around downstairs because we didn't have television (my family just moved to the mountains and we couldn't afford Stone age cable back then).

I developed a guilt trip about that until a few years ago, I ran across the second sweetheart on Facebook. I asked her if she was still pissed off about me and number one. She told me that it ruined her life (she went and married another guy who promptly got himself killed on a motorcycle).

My guilt trip is now an around-the-world cruise.
2013-02-01 12:29:59 AM
1 votes:
I avoid meat packing plants, clowns cause me nightmares and the smell of butane... no, anything but that. Finally got over my fear of eggplant.
2013-02-01 12:27:28 AM
1 votes:
And ... scene

cravingideas.blogs.com cravingideas.blogs.com
2013-02-01 12:27:07 AM
1 votes:
Great article.
Paraphrased: "The study included only college aged students whose first encounter was heterosexual, consensual and within the last 3 years. Anyone not fitting that profile was excluded from the study."
2013-02-01 12:25:39 AM
1 votes:
Cool, I'll keep this in mind in case I ever get lucky.

/Gotta happen one of these days.
//Doesn't it?
///Anyone want to take 46 year old out for a test drive?
2013-02-01 12:21:23 AM
1 votes:
Never say never.

Anne.Uumellmahaye: Hubby punched my V card, so I suppose I'll never know the difference.

 
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