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(Slate)   How you lose your virginity may scar you for life   (slate.com) divider line 265
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22551 clicks; posted to Main » on 01 Feb 2013 at 12:16 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2013-02-01 01:42:21 AM  

traylor: thorthor: My first time in the back seat of moms toyota corolla,

Hey, you and me have something in common!


You both lost your virginity in the back seat of his moms Toyota Carolla?
 
2013-02-01 01:42:23 AM  
Especially if vagina dentata are involved.
 
2013-02-01 01:43:17 AM  

Peki: First time was a rape, so no study questions for me. Good news is the fiancé and I average once a day, so it's hard to say I'm scarred in any way.

/the fact that I'm bi, like to be submissive, and have a good amount of kink means I'm normal. Right?


Legitimately.
 
2013-02-01 01:44:28 AM  
When I was 17, me and this cute cheerleader chick who was in my English class got together when her parents were gone to watch a "Ren and Stimpy" marathon that I had on tape. With in a short period of time, it was my first time. However, we were so caught up in the moment that we let Ren and Stimpy play on while we got it on. At one point in time I was hitting it doggy style in rythm with the song Happy Happy Joy Joy (to be honest I sang along under my breath at one point). I think this kinda scarred me for the rest of my life, but who knows... I know csb and such.
 
2013-02-01 01:46:45 AM  
urod.ru
 
2013-02-01 01:46:53 AM  
The time I almost lost my virginity was probably a shorter, crazier story.
CSB, Dear Penthouse Rejections and tl;dr bait:

I wanted to lose my virginity with a girl I loved and cared for...up until I was 18.  I spent a month just before I was 19 at a friend's party house getting drunk, playing video games, trying weed, and being social.  This was when Tony Hawk and the first Grand Theft Auto were big, to set the scene.  I remember points in my life based on what I was playing at the time.  That is probably a good indication of why I remained virginal until I was 18, but I digress.  While I was baked, drunk and generally out of my mind, I decided that I didn't want to be a 19 year old virgin, so I began to look for girls around my area on ICQ.

I found this girl I went to high school with.  I remembered her being at least presentable in my mind, so we started chatting.  She was still a virgin and wanted to lose her purity card, too.  A few <i>sexy</i> *shudder* phone calls later and I went to her apartment.  I knocked on the door and this really ugly guy answered.  I asked if the girl was home and he called her name.  I noticed another man there getting ready to go out.  Perhaps her dad was gay.  That's cool, whatever.  I should have looked a little closer in retrospect.  The first guy was her mom.  When she came to the door I found I had the wrong image in my mind of the girl I was thinking about from high school.  Still, I was determined.

Her...mom left with the boyfriend and we were watching some movies on the couch with her nephew and niece that she was babysitting.  They went to bed and we were watching...something.  It may have had Robin Williams in it, but I wasn't really paying attention as I was thinking the whole time about my situation.  We both sat there next to each other in silence for the duration of the film.  The credits ran.  The tape blacked out.  The snow fell on the screen.  The tape rewound.  The VCR turned off.  The blue hue of the tv due to the absent signal illuminated the room.  I looked at her.  She started to turn her head and I made the final decision to attack.

I pounced on her and she started making out with me for about 30 minutes before inviting me up to her room.  We went upstairs and started getting naked.  I was fumbling around like an idiot.  I'd had plenty of above the waist action, but little down below.  I started to move down to give her oral.  She obviously hadn't showered that day.  It was the nastiest funk I've ever tasted and I spent a good part of childhood putting weird, rancid things in my mouth on dares and what-have-yous.  I couldn't do that to my little guy, but I brought a condom.  I could dress him up at least.  SCUBA divers swim in the ocean but don't walk around all day smelling like fish, right?

We finally get to the penetration.  That went well.  I took it easy.  It was a little bloody, but I expected that.  What I didn't expect was to be so turned off that I started going limp.  About 25 minutes in, and every 5 minutes thereafter for a total duration of 40 minutes, I started faking leg cramps.  I had to pull out, get myself going and then try to focus on finishing.  How I envied those men with premature ejaculation.  Finally, it happened.  I had achieved what I meant to achieve: my most disappointing orgasm to date.

I fell asleep next to her.  She woke me up a couple of hours later wanting to go again.  I, brought a couple of condoms, but told her I was out.  She ran to her...mom's room in search of more and couldn't find any.  She suggested that we should just pull out, but I was very adamant about that condom.  Her nephew and niece woke up and she went downstairs to get them food.  I finished getting dressed and went to sit on the couch for a bit until the bus arrived.  The kids finished breakfast and started watching tv.  She came over, threw a pillow on my lap and tried to get me going again...in front of the kids.  I hastily thanked her for the evening, gave her a kiss, and left.  I went home and took the longest shower in the world.  I swear I could smell that funk on me for the next 6 months.

Addendum:
A month later, I went to her senior prom.  We drove with some mutual friends.  She wore a dress she made for renaissance fairs.  We stopped to get food and she tried to get me going under the table while we were all eating.  The notion hit me that she probably wanted to sleep with me that night.  Perhaps it was mean, but I couldn't do that again, especially with that smell so deeply ingrained in or on me.  I left her with those friends at the prom by the end of the night.  It was a dick move, I suppose, but I just couldn't do that again.

Thank god it got better.  It was nothing but quality pussy from there on out.
 
2013-02-01 01:48:27 AM  
That wasn't the time I almost lost my virginity, btw.  That last story was the time I did and was much, much longer than I anticipated.
 
2013-02-01 01:51:12 AM  

Genevieve Marie: tinfoil-hat maggie: Well said, I didn't RTFA or anything but really, what are they trying to prove?

Probably that True Love Waits and OMG DON'T HAVE SEX THE WORLD WILL COME CRASHING DOWN AROUND YOU AND NO ONE WILL EVER LOVE YOU AGAIN.

Honestly, I think the idea that you're damaged or ruined by having sex screws up waaay more people than sex itself. Looking back when I was younger- I had a lot of sex. It was mostly highly enjoyable. The only stuff that really hurt at the time was people treating me as damaged because I'd chosen to have sex.


Right, gothcha, classic male BS. I guess it was Ia good thing then I didn't have sex with a man till I was 21-22 of course I had been sexually active since 14.
 
2013-02-01 01:56:41 AM  

jdmac: When I was 17, me and this cute cheerleader chick who was in my English class got together when her parents were gone to watch a "Ren and Stimpy" marathon that I had on tape. With in a short period of time, it was my first time. However, we were so caught up in the moment that we let Ren and Stimpy play on while we got it on. At one point in time I was hitting it doggy style in rythm with the song Happy Happy Joy Joy (to be honest I sang along under my breath at one point). I think this kinda scarred me for the rest of my life, but who knows... I know csb and such.


It wasn't my first time, but I've sung Happy Happy Joy Joy during sex too. She laughed, eventually I ended up marrying her.
 
2013-02-01 01:57:45 AM  

spman: traylor: thorthor: My first time in the back seat of moms toyota corolla,

Hey, you and me have something in common!

You both lost your virginity in the back seat of his moms Toyota Carolla?



Yep. There was plenty of space in it!

/no, not in the car
 
2013-02-01 01:59:20 AM  
The first time I had sex I was really scared................I was all alone.
cps-static.rovicorp.com
 
2013-02-01 02:02:56 AM  

Wyalt Derp: Especially if vagina dentata are involved.


Yes, know you know my dark secret : )
 
2013-02-01 02:03:32 AM  

amindofiron: cardex: 13 boyscout camp circle jerk turned fourgy

Well, damn son, that's an epic tale needs told.


more or less self explanatory i was 13 and at a 2 week long camping trip with about 300 other scouts for some reason a few of us had a late night event I think it was working on the astronomy merit badge after it was over around 2 am most of the guys went bed but 6 of us decided to take a shower first while we were soaping up one of the guys got hard and it was contagious next thing you know we were all stroking two of the guys finished then ran off.  Two of the guys were from the same town and one started blowing the other, the only guy left ask if I had ever done it i said no, next thing I know he is on his knees.  Became a nightly event for the 4 of us trading who was doing who.  Kinda wish I could remember the names of any of the other guys
 
2013-02-01 02:10:02 AM  
15 was drinking with some classmates when the older sister came in stoned as hell and took my beer away. Then basically ordered me to go to her room with her. Spent the next 8 or 9 months banging her in every place and position and way possible. Not traumatized in the least, I learned a lot. Still have a thing for redheads though.
/Can you have more than one first?
//Anal?
///Oral?
////Vaginal?
 
2013-02-01 02:10:59 AM  

Hyatus: The time I almost lost my virginity was probably a shorter, crazier story.
CSB, Dear Penthouse Rejections and tl;dr bait:

*snip*

Thank god it got better. It was nothing but quality pussy from there on out.





Mine's a little the other way. She was older (a friend of my mom's), and that biatch could suck start a Harley. I've been looking for over 30 years for a woman that could give head as good or better than her ever since. All the regular sex has been pretty good though.
 
2013-02-01 02:11:50 AM  

tinfoil-hat maggie: Wyalt Derp: Especially if vagina dentata are involved.

Yes, know you know my dark secret : )


*gasp*

well that......bites
 
2013-02-01 02:13:46 AM  

TenJed_77: 15 was drinking with some classmates when the older sister came in stoned as hell and took my beer away. Then basically ordered me to go to her room with her. Spent the next 8 or 9 months banging her in every place and position and way possible. Not traumatized in the least, I learned a lot. Still have a thing for redheads though.
/Can you have more than one first?
//Anal?
///Oral?
////Vaginal?


Please explain, your sister, or your friend's sister?
 
2013-02-01 02:17:31 AM  

KangTheMad: TenJed_77: 15 was drinking with some classmates when the older sister came in stoned as hell and took my beer away. Then basically ordered me to go to her room with her. Spent the next 8 or 9 months banging her in every place and position and way possible. Not traumatized in the least, I learned a lot. Still have a thing for redheads though.
/Can you have more than one first?
//Anal?
///Oral?
////Vaginal?

Please explain, your sister, or your friend's sister?

Friends older sister
 
2013-02-01 02:18:47 AM  

Omahawg: tinfoil-hat maggie: Wyalt Derp: Especially if vagina dentata are involved.

Yes, know you know my dark secret : )

*gasp*

well that......bites


Just be gentle or did you not see the documentary.
images.starpulse.com
 
2013-02-01 02:19:28 AM  

TenJed_77: KangTheMad: TenJed_77: 15 was drinking with some classmates when the older sister came in stoned as hell and took my beer away. Then basically ordered me to go to her room with her. Spent the next 8 or 9 months banging her in every place and position and way possible. Not traumatized in the least, I learned a lot. Still have a thing for redheads though.
/Can you have more than one first?
//Anal?
///Oral?
////Vaginal?

Please explain, your sister, or your friend's sister?
Friends older sister


Alright, that makes more sense
 
2013-02-01 02:20:23 AM  
Was to a Native American girl.

I've been in touch with the land ever since.
 
2013-02-01 02:21:11 AM  

tinfoil-hat maggie: Wyalt Derp: Especially if vagina dentata are involved.

Yes, know you know my dark secret : )


You say "yes," I say "know..."
 
2013-02-01 02:24:13 AM  
Nah, he was small.  Didn't leave scars.
 
2013-02-01 02:24:37 AM  

cardex: amindofiron: cardex: 13 boyscout camp circle jerk turned fourgy

Well, damn son, that's an epic tale needs told.

more or less self explanatory i was 13 and at a 2 week long camping trip with about 300 other scouts for some reason a few of us had a late night event I think it was working on the astronomy merit badge after it was over around 2 am most of the guys went bed but 6 of us decided to take a shower first while we were soaping up one of the guys got hard and it was contagious next thing you know we were all stroking two of the guys finished then ran off.  Two of the guys were from the same town and one started blowing the other, the only guy left ask if I had ever done it i said no, next thing I know he is on his knees.  Became a nightly event for the 4 of us trading who was doing who.  Kinda wish I could remember the names of any of the other guys


^this, is what I missed out on by not being a scout.
\was forbidden from joining, didn't know why at the time
\\turns out the local scoutmaster was a known kiddy diddler.
\\\not sure if the tradeoff would have been worth it.
 
2013-02-01 02:25:56 AM  

UsikFark: tinfoil-hat maggie: Wyalt Derp: Especially if vagina dentata are involved.

Yes, know you know my dark secret : )

You say "yes," I say "know..."


Hon, If I ever go too long without typo's that means I'm not drinking and something is defiantly wrong with the universe : )
/Then be afraid.
 
2013-02-01 02:28:09 AM  
you people need to make your stories longer. I'm trying to fap over here!!!
 
2013-02-01 02:28:30 AM  

tinfoil-hat maggie: UsikFark: tinfoil-hat maggie: Wyalt Derp: Especially if vagina dentata are involved.

Yes, know you know my dark secret : )

You say "yes," I say "know..."

Hon, If I ever go too long without typo's that means I'm not drinking and something is defiantly wrong with the universe : )
/Then be afraid.


yeah, she'll bite ya! ;)
 
2013-02-01 02:30:22 AM  
Well...yes. But only because I lived with that that neurotic biatch for the following 9 months.

-
 
2013-02-01 02:33:11 AM  
I don't think either of us were scarred. It was more like, "Was that it?" More awkward and anti-climatic than anything else.
 
2013-02-01 02:33:26 AM  

tinfoil-hat maggie: Wyalt Derp: Especially if vagina dentata are involved.

Yes, know you know my dark secret : )


Wait a minute...if vagina dentata "are" involved...is it there are more than one vagina or more than one dentatas? Or both?
 
2013-02-01 02:34:42 AM  
Hell my first kiss wasn't till i was 20. She was my neighbor girl also lost my virginity to her. We didn't really date or anything, just hooked up a few times. It wasn't anything special.
 
2013-02-01 02:39:20 AM  
Wow, a 20-or-30-something female Brooklynite website editor writing a column defending her sex life! Who ever heard of such a daring, refreshing concept for an article? It even mentions rape and "heteronormative" viewpoints! I smell Pulitzer!!! A+'s for everybody!!!!!
 
2013-02-01 02:42:43 AM  

Gyrfalcon: tinfoil-hat maggie: Wyalt Derp: Especially if vagina dentata are involved.

Yes, know you know my dark secret : )

Wait a minute...if vagina dentata "are" involved...is it there are more than one vagina or more than one dentatas? Or both?


Here's a little song that could help : )
www.justsomebroad.com
/Wut?
 
2013-02-01 02:55:24 AM  
Not really a CSB, but by high school sweetheart drove 300 miles through the mountains to visit me during my freshman year in college. Out of respect for my dorm mate, I rented room in an econolodge. She, uh, "borrowed" a flowing nightgown from her mother to make it special, since she usually slept naked.

We did it 8 times that night. I fell asleep inside her halfway through, so the next time during foreplay I manage to discover and extract a full condom from deep within her nether. The next day we were trolling around the grocery store pharmacy shyly inquiring about recent developments in OTC "morning after" pills, but were turned away.

But it turned out fine. Plenty of scares over the remaining years, but she didn't actually get pregnant until after we'd been married for a year, and I had just gotten a good full time job. Actually, it happened when I got sent home from work again just after "the" Sept 11th. I still remember remarking how many other kids were born around the same time.

In 13 years of marriage, never got anywhere close to 8 times ever again. But the quality, control, and coordination is much improved, even as athleticism and variety has somewhat declined.

OK, now for CSB : when I was about 13, my older male cousin gave me oral to climax while we were experimenting in his room and playing video games. My wife still can't beat that :P
 
2013-02-01 02:59:18 AM  
The wife and I both punched our "V cards" when we got married.  Suffice it to say, everything went well, and you won't hear any complaints from either of us.

However, I have to admit that I'm a bit surprised that we managed to pull it off at all.  Between getting up extra early for hair appointments, tux adjustments, and last minute stuff, a wedding, a reception, and untangling the random crap that my buddies tied to my car, we were both beyond exhausted.

They really should allow a 1-2 hour break between weddings and receptions, so the newlyweds can take care of things while they're not tired as hell.  ;)
 
2013-02-01 03:01:41 AM  

Coelacanth: Back in 1974, I lost my cherry to my first high school sweetheart while my second high school sweetheart moped around downstairs because we didn't have television (my family just moved to the mountains and we couldn't afford Stone age cable back then).


Girlfriends like you are the reason I have trust issues with beautiful women.

I developed a guilt trip about that until a few years ago, I ran across the second sweetheart on Facebook. I asked her if she was still pissed off

Whoa, my bad.  I have nothing but respect for lesbians, with all the other shiat you probably have to deal with.
 
2013-02-01 03:02:46 AM  
Summer girl. I was 16, she was 17.
Nice body, face like Geddy Lee.

/no scars
 
2013-02-01 03:08:28 AM  

Betep: Summer girl. I was 16, she was 17.
Nice body, face like Geddy Lee.

/no scars


So she had a face like an old witchy woman?
 
2013-02-01 03:08:59 AM  
3 teens, I was 5. Dad claimed it was my fault.
I am sure they are dead now, so there is that.
 
2013-02-01 03:10:59 AM  

Genevieve Marie: tinfoil-hat maggie: Well said, I didn't RTFA or anything but really, what are they trying to prove?

Probably that True Love Waits and OMG DON'T HAVE SEX THE WORLD WILL COME CRASHING DOWN AROUND YOU AND NO ONE WILL EVER LOVE YOU AGAIN.

Honestly, I think the idea that you're damaged or ruined by having sex screws up waaay more people than sex itself. Looking back when I was younger- I had a lot of sex. It was mostly highly enjoyable. The only stuff that really hurt at the time was people treating me as damaged because I'd chosen to have sex.


Considering the age of the people in their study, they should also have been examining how they had been scarred by NOT losing their virginity yet.
 
2013-02-01 03:13:24 AM  
Llama-skin rugs are really hard to find, so it's hard to know if I have any hangups. Also, I'm a bit old for 18-year-old blondes. And married.
 
2013-02-01 03:19:30 AM  

KangTheMad: fusillade762: So don't lose your virginity. Got it.

No problems there, never bothered. Most of the girls in my high school were utter biatches.


Mmmmmmmmmmmmm, Utters.

/you were saying?
 
2013-02-01 03:29:49 AM  

Arn_Dee: Ain't no scars on me.


Look INSIDE
 
2013-02-01 03:32:11 AM  

Bob Down: Remember my first time? I can barely remember the last time with my wife.


Funny, I do.
 
2013-02-01 03:34:52 AM  
Yeah right. I've repressed those memories so much I couldn't remember if I wanted to.
 
2013-02-01 03:37:43 AM  

Peki: First time was a rape, so no study questions for me. Good news is the fiancé and I average once a day, so it's hard to say I'm scarred in any way.

/the fact that I'm bi, like to be submissive, and have a good amount of kink means I'm normal. Right?


As Savage said, Chinese menu sex, column A, B, and C, in increasing kink. People have a lot of A, and more C than they will admit.

(Me? Me, I like midgets wearing latex balloons.)
 
2013-02-01 03:39:02 AM  

Peki: /the fact that I'm bi, like to be submissive, and have a good amount of kink means I'm normal. Right?


That or it means your profile just got viewed by almost every guy here.
 
2013-02-01 03:41:10 AM  

not_an_indigo: Nah, he was small.  Didn't leave scars.


Well Ferk you,

You weren't even my first.

:O
 
2013-02-01 03:42:09 AM  
If you're scarred for life, you should probably have agreed on a safe word, before you started
 
2013-02-01 04:05:51 AM  

bigdanc: I hope the coont hole I saved myself for can sleep at night after, you know, pretending she didn't have a husband and then, you know, revealing she did have a husband and, you know, using him for the reason she had to break up with me, you know, after I told her how: being a catholic dude - the first time was special, you know.

/may be a little bitter @ the girl
//may have gained 100lbs in protest
///may be a little bitter @ the loss of one's eternal soul.
////Is happy he will be teaching his sons to... well, you don't want to know


Sounds like the makings for a family of Crazy Religious Serial Killers., tbh.  Actually, did they already make a movie about your family starring Matthew McConaughey and Bill Paxton?
 
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